Birth Plan Requests That Actually Make Sense (What I Wouldn't Do If I Gave Birth)

[@Chislevs]

As an anesthesiologist who used to work in obstetrics a lot - we did not have any objection to patients eatint and drinking while in labor. Your gastric emptying is impaired anyway. Never had a woman throw up during the csection either - making sure blood pressure is adequate usually does the trick anyway.

[@katherinep708]

This makes me pissed that the nurses and doctor forbade me from eating during my induction

[@HomemakerSuzy]

I woke up hungry, but my water broke before my actual labor started, so I went into the hospital super early (3cm). I ended up getting an epidural, but was starving and was only given popsicles. I had GD and it was this vicious cycle of sugary popsicles, check sugar, ooo its high, time for some insulin! On repeat. I told my povider this and said this doesn't seem that productive, to which they agreed. Because our first came early we disnt bring snacks, this time I am packing snacks, water mix ins, etc. I told my husband I would NOT be tortured again if that happened. Also currently packing the freezer and canning up some quick meals for postpartum, because I remember how little help we got last time. Luckily our toddler is excited for baby brother and always wants to help.

[@mamanursetina]

Gosh I am so sorry!! Like its just too long for our labouring bodies to go!!

[@NekoArts]

I am 3 weeks postpartum and if I could have a do-over, the first thing I would do is find a provider that is willing to respect my requests for labor, birth and postpartum. Unfortunately for me, neither one of my requests were adhered to and I was given no valid reason for why. I was given an episiotomy even though I didn't want one, I was given Pitocin (and it was brutal) even though I asked to avoid medical interventions unless absolutely necessary, they cut the cord immediately (the midwife told me that if we delayed the cord clamping, baby would get jaundice for having too much blood and they'd have to take her away from me), no skin-to-skin, they fed her formula behind my back even after I had told them that I wanted her exclusively breastfed (again; unless there was a problem where I couldn't feed her), etc, etc. If I said "no" to anything (like the Pitocin) they'd go behind my back and ask my husband instead (and he never says "no" to doctors so there's that). From beginning to end, it was a pretty bad experience and I wouldn't wish it on anyone. Baby is here and she's happy and healthy which I'm very thankful for, but I so wanted our experience to be different..

[@SomeonesGhost]

I'm so sorry! That's sounds miserable! I'm glad you are both doing well now tho!!

[@mamanursetina]

Oh my gosh. I’m so sorry that all happened.

[@sagarue]

I'm so sorry, the only thing I am ask from my husband is unmoving support of my decision. I hope/belive he will come through he hates doctors so I got that going for me

[@pienkunicorn]

That's horrible! It makes my blood boil that moms are treated like this

[@miap.s.795]

Wow, this is infuriating. The audacity of people to ruin such a sacred and wonderful experience for another smh.

[@natashatsimbler]

Planning for the postpartum period is sooo important! If there's ne plan in place, you are in for a very tough time...😅

[@mamanursetina]

I agree so much. It’s the most intense phase of life changes!!

[@laurenmawe3678]

Other things that helped me so much postpartum include: set up a meal train, order supplies for you, mama (a pack of adult diapers and then different levels of pads, hydration packets, some nice shampoo, conditioner, soap, etc.), give a thought to some post-partum outfits (gentle on your swollen tummy, consider breastfeeding, also feeling a little put together), try to stock up the pantry and freezer a bit (microwavable breakfast burritos and smoothie bags for the win). Lastly, for me, being pretty open to having loved ones around while I was a hormonal/crying mess. Consider a making a list of audiobooks / shows / movies to look forward to.

[@mamanursetina]

@@laurenmawe3678 yes yes yes!

[@laurenmawe3678]

I feel like this is the most practical and useful advice about a birth plan I’ve seen. Thank you.

[@mamanursetina]

Hey, I'll take it! And you're welcome :)

[@kenziemayrae3568]

My big #1 I did not want a doctor present unless there's a problem. Coming from someone who is trying to become a doctor! Doctors are for emergencies, certified nurse midwives are the EXPERTS on "normal" uncomplicated births. I wanted the experts. 💛 and in an emergency, the doctors are the experts : )

[@PinkTikiria]

Gave birth to my first two sons in France at the hospital, regular vaginal births are attended by two midwives and a nursery nurse, that’s it. For the first one after almost 2 days with no results (3cm dilated only and lost my water 40h before) the intern showed up once I agreed to an epidural to avoid a C-section. Head of OB showed up like 5h after when they prepared for a C-section. Luckily didn’t need one as he finally decided to cooperate on the last try haha. Second birth I barely saw the midwife as she told me I was doing great and she was happy to stay but if I’d rather be alone with my husband she would leave us be. We just called her when I felt I needed to push to check if I was dilated enough and so she could catch the baby! Third birth was a home birth in Greece. Two amazing midwives who followed my every request (unfortunately hospital births are not at all the same here, mostly bad experiences from what I heard- hence the home birth), and again no doctor. Doctors are a great option to have for emergencies, but when things are going well midwives know better and most importantly they adapt to you and your needs, not the other way around! When I was looking for a hospital in Greece and asked a few questions I was flabbergasted at the answers I was getting, for example when I asked if I could give birth on my knees they said I would have to lie down on my back because I should think of the doctor’s confort (no shit they literally told me that)… 😳

[@juliennetully4814]

It makes me so furious that so many people get robbed of having a vaginal birth for ridiculous reasons (baby is “too big”, breech, etc.) c sections should only be for life and death risks for mother and baby during a vaginal birth. Ladies, you do have the right to refuse inductions and c sections. Don’t let doctors try to manipulate you into getting those when you do not need them!

[@mamanursetina]

Absolutely have the right to refuse anything, really. The provider ‘should’ be able to explain to you very clearly why having a c-section is less risky than waiting and attempting a vaginal birth. I just did a whole video on ways to try to avoid a c-section, the rates are consistently rising

[@loganthompson5374]

Had a homebirth recently, my 2nd breech baby boy! “emergency” c-section with my first and a completely natural labor up until that point until they saw he was breech. Had bad side effects from it and I had to keep going back and forth to the hospital for the first week so I couldn’t be with my baby as he needed me to be. I still hate that memory to this day. I will always choose homebirth unless intervention is TRULY needed. Most of the time, it is not. Not to mention, crawling into your own bed with your baby after birth is heavenly.

[@amyraszipovits810]

My cousin delivered a nearly 12 lb baby vaginally. Superwoman.

[@MrsMacWifey]

I was given standard consent forms to sign in preparation for my midwife-attended hospital birth (to release the hospital from liability, etc), and the section on "risks of C-section" was about a paragraph, while the "risks of vaginal birth" section was a page and a half long. It's total insanity.

[@a.ekundayo]

@@loganthompson5374so you had a breech HVBAC ?!❤ that’s amazing. My first baby was breech, I had been planning a home birth but had a c-section & am still traumatized now pregnant again and so afraid that this baby will be breech again, planning another homebirth and considering if I will still stay home if baby ends up breech.

[@jaymeseifert7432]

I would add that if this is your first baby or if you’re having a hospital birth in general, hire a doula! They will advocate for you and will be one of the few people who will make sure you get the birth you want! But also take a birthing class that goes over what your rights are in the delivery room.

[@monicataylor7414]

Yes a doula for my first daughter was a life saver. She was advocating for me the whole time

[@Account-wx1qz]

I’ve held this in long enough. I was induced! My baby was hurting me… so I had the balloon!! That medicine was causing contractions that stung and burned really bad. So every time the nurses left I would push because something kept whispering for me to push. They thought the baby was declining because her heart beat went off the monitor at the front. I mean they ran in pulling my bed for an emergency c-section. They lifted the blanket and said the baby head is out😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂! She said PUUUUSSH! Her dad was on the couch sleeping! I screamed for him to get up! I pushed 2 times and she was out😂! Yes she’s a Covid baby! So that was my experience ❤️

[@michaellaivey5904]

Induction scheduled for 6 days from now. My birth plan is already flying out the window. However, I still believe I can have an empowering birth.

[@mamanursetina]

You ABSOLUTELY can

[@jonesfamilyfarms9325]

Oh my friend I’m so glad I caught you in time!! Look up midwives brew! I just had my fourth baby (second I drank midwives brew with) and I went into labor four hours later with both of them :)

[@michaellaivey5904]

Thanks, but I'm good. I'll stick with what my medical team have reccomended.

[@jonesfamilyfarms9325]

@@michaellaivey5904 no worries, best of luck! Enjoy those sweet postpartum snuggles 🥰

[@SomeonesGhost]

Thank you so much for this video!! I haven't done my birth preference sheet yet, but this will help give me a good starting point! Thank you!! (FTM Due October!)

[@mamanursetina]

Eeeek! Exciting!

[@lvkw22]

I'm having my first in October too! So exciting! 🎉❤

[@SomeonesGhost]

​@@mamanursetina Thank you!!! We're really blessed and very excited!! 😊 Your videos have been so helpful so far!!

[@SomeonesGhost]

​@@lvkw22 what's your due date??

[@rachelbroughton6457]

I feel bad for the US mothers who are not allowed to eat in labour! So crazy! I’m Australian and people are always talking about/writing blogs about/posting on social media about what snacks they are packing for labour! I just wanted small sugary things to keep my energy up in labour - yes I did throw some of it back up again but in the moment it felt like my body needed it!

[@mamanursetina]

It’s bonkers to me that this is still a thing.

[@pienkunicorn]

This is great info. But why are we as patients put in the position of having to advocate for things that should really just be standards of care? Like why isn't delayed cord clamping standard? Why do you have to ask if your cervix is ready for induction??

[@mamanursetina]

These are very valid and fair questions. The answer in my mind is because the climate in the obstetrical world needs to change. It’s starting but there’s still a LOT to be done. For example delayed cord clamping is standard in a lot of places where 5 years ago it wasn’t. But there are still some places where it’s not or maybe you want longer than the standard. I would love to be in a world where it wasn’t this way but truth is it needs work and work to change.

[@pienkunicorn]

@@mamanursetina well you're helping the change. The more women see your work and advocates for themselves the faster it will hopefully go.

[@annam.m.2909]

I had to be induced for 4 days because my water broke. No choice there. C-section was an option on a 4 day which I really didn't want, so epidural and pushing. Could eat and drink with no restrictions. Here in Germany most of the C-sections women are awake, so no problem with food nor drink.

[@AprilLee1996]

I ate a Jr. bacon cheeseburger and fries from Wendy's as I was being induced 🤣 very proud to say I kept it down 🤣

[@jademccalister6847]

I’m 38 weeks today and my last baby in 2017 was a c-section and immediately after cutting me and such i threw up. I did turn my head to the side as you can’t sit up but i just let it roll down my cheek to my ear to make sure it was all out. And I was safe. Honestly after it happened i forgot i even did it and when did i, or them, clean it off of me

[@mamanursetina]

Man, throwing up is the worst!!

[@jademccalister6847]

@@mamanursetina seriously 😣😮‍💨

[@nancyjohnson6557]

Last time I got a cervical exam I had been in labor for the whole day and my midwife checked me and I was still only four centimeters, so she said to call if anything changed, then things picked up so fast that she missed the birth. I ended up catching my own baby while my husband did counter pressure. It was possibly my best birth, but that’s what I’ve said about every birth I’ve had.

[@mamanursetina]

Whaaat? That's absolutely wild...BUT....I bet you felt so empowered, like a total boss hey??

[@monicataylor7414]

I honestly wish I had a birth that went like that. My hospital experience was hit or miss

[@acoe2012ac]

I so desperately WISH this video was out a month ago 😮‍💨 I had an induction July 16th that turned into an emergency C-section because baby was distressed (Bradycardia) I definitely would be talking more about my cervix prior to Pitocin

[@mamanursetina]

Shoot! I am so sorry. Hopefully you are soaking up all the baby snuggles with your little one now.

[@acoe2012ac]

@@mamanursetina I’m glad I know now 🥰 but despite complications, everything went well! baby and I are fine and I can attempt a vbac in a couple years ♥️ thank you for your videos!!

[@mariaocean2165]

My 1st pregnancy lasted almost 42 weeks, i had bracket Hicks an few times. So i was induced by pitcon, i threw up non-stop for 14 hours. They tried putting the needle in my spine, but i couldn't stop throwing up. When it came time to deliver i was barely conscious. The doctor ordered the nurses to feed me orange juice and ice cubes to keep me awake, pushing was going well, but for some reason they wanted me to push (or was it pull) on my legs during active labor, but i kept getting confused if it was push or pull. My 2nd pregnancy, the obgym was famous for doing an c-section for everyone, no matter what, an young female obgyn. I have blood clots disorder and her hospital didn't keep blood on hand. Apparently she had an crying fit in the hallway because she wanted to do an c-section because I when into labour on my own an month early. The baby was head 1st and doing good and my blood pressure was good. Bags of blood were send from another hospital and bags of platelets too, for after birth. The birth when well and baby was jus over 5lbs, apparently an uti triggered my labour, they discovered after i gave birth.

[@libertylovesnails]

What are your thoughts on declining cervical checks?

[@mamanursetina]

I have shorts on this. IMO there’s a need to know and a nice to know. I personally think declining ALL cervical checks is really dangerous because sometimes what is found can actually have an impact on how or how quickly you (should) give birth. But I do think it should always be explained to you why that professional believes this cervical check at this moment is important to your plan of care and have your consent before doing them.

[@libertylovesnails]

@@mamanursetina i appreciate that and I’ll check out your shorts!!! My last cervical check caused a tear in my water bag (thankfully it was 2 days before i was due) but i want to be very mindful this time of like you said: need to know over nice to know. Thank you!!

[@asana_awakening]

@@mamanursetinasecond on not declining all cervical checks! I’m 11 days PP and I wanted limited checks. i was only checked twice, when I was admitted and when I wasn’t progressing. I ended up being stuck in transition for four hours at 9cm because I had a lip of my cervix stuck. We would have never known! My midwife ended up having to manually move it out of the way during a contraction, I was so grateful things got moving after that!!

[@MrsMuffin11]

I told my midwife and nurse that I wanted to be the one that requested them and they had no problem with that. After the initial one to make sure my water broke I requested one when I thought I was at 8cm (I was at 4 lol) and then one after my body started pushing and I couldn't control it (I was at 10) 🙂

[@nicolescheer6615]

Where was this video a week ago? I ended up getting induced 6 days ago and after 3 days had a bishop score of 2. Did cervadil, cytotec, and pitocin. Made the hard decision to get a C section instead of the foley balloon. Good thing too as baby had the umbilical cord wrapped TWICE around her neck. She's healthy but I feel like I should have noped out of that induction much harder.

[@funnygaming2672]

Pitocin has traumatize me FOR YEARS ...i pass hours not been able to breath and eyes turn white back in my head scaring my husband and needed an epidural ....i was 1 week "late" i was like 41or 42 week pregnant and was opening normally but the hospital decided that i must take that med to open up which it doing fine by itself ! i had my daughter at 21 and until to my 35 years anniversary i did not know that it was not normal to not have a break to breath so a miss on having kids!!! no one has explained to me the effect of what was injected and what it does. Now im 35 trying to get pregnant and mad because i loos precious time to have kids !!!I want a no touch birth at home because i cannot trust the hospital the strong contraction was a walk in the park until i got that poison!!! For info i kept having 5 up to 7 contractions with no stopping point to breath! plus i end up birthing on my back destroying it and having 2 dose of epidural ...🤬🤬😤😤 no more meds!!! over my dead body! i will never say ok to Pitocin !!! I rather be in pain and be able to breath and move around like i want and feel the best position to give birth ,i was so upset when a random nurse enter my room asking if i enjoy their pool or the birthing ball after i deliver my baby ! 😭😭

[@rebeccastanley9920]

I requested delayed cord clamping with my baby and the nurse said they didn’t like to wait more than one minute because there was an increased risk of jaundice. Is that actually true?

[@PinkTikiria]

My midwives for my third birth did delayed clamping and told me it’s their standard and the baby was fine, just a little jaundice but nothing to worry about je didn’t need lamps or anything (actually had less than my first who was clamped right away)

[@twitch.0230]

Im currently 21 and im 8 weeks and 5 days pregnant with our first baby. Honestly im a ball of nerves and just hoping for a healthy pregnancy and baby. I have a cyst on my right ovary and an early scan showed blood in my uterus around baby. They assured me in can be normal and to try not to panic but im an overthinker and im so nervous.

[@lydia1634]

I barf during labor. With my first, I didn't know this, and my mom handed me some applesauce after my water broke before I went to the hospital. I barfed seven times in five minutes. So with my second, when I realized I was in full blown labor while cooking dinner, I did not eat. I didn't bard until they made me eat ice chips some time after midnight to wake up my baby for monitoring. With number three, it was the middle of the night, I did not eat, and I still barfed just before delivering. Nasty. But if I wasn't like this, food would probably be a good idea.

[@mamanursetina]

Uuuuugh....I HATE puking, I'm so sorry!

[@amandasolis6184]

On the point about pitocin, what should I do if my water breaks but my cervix isn’t ready? This happened with my son. My water broke at 1am, hospital around 3am and started pitocin. By 5pm I had only dilated to 2cm with intensely painful contractions due to the heavy dose of pitocin. Currently pregnant with number 2, due in a few weeks, and I’m hoping to have a different experience this time around.

[@nobione_kenobi2114]

This sorta makes me want to bring up vaginal birth again to my dr. My first ended up as a csection & multiple blood transfusions after(they said he was stuck and were concerned, was never offered vacuum or anything when I was pushing, and I had an on call dr since it was the holiday weekend). Dr has told me she's concerned about bleeding, but I wonder how much control with bleeding there is cutting me open vs vaginal?

[@christinebrito6535]

This might be a dumb question but for delayed cord clamping is delivering the placenta not anything to worry about? Or do they have to cut it before this happens?

[@PinkTikiria]

For my third I asked for delayed cord clamping and they delivered the placenta first. They only clamped it once mal the blood was out of it. Can’t remember how long exactly that took as I was tired and busy breastfeeding but I remember it being quite a while after.

[@khsbtbotl1015]

I know this is off topic but do you have advice on miscarriage. My husband and i lost a baby and there isnt much out there other than try again or not... your choice.

[@mamanursetina]

There are some situations where it might be worthwhile to look into a few things before trying to conceive again but from my understanding that's usually after several losses. Would be best to check in with a reproductive endocrinologist for some answers as it isn't at all my area of experience. I'm sorry for your loss.

[@SamanthaDorsey-ng6qt]

For delayed cord clamping my dr told me if you’re type o blood it’s not the best bet because of some bilirubin issue? Can you explain it?

[@mamanursetina]

So technically all delayed cord clamping has a risk of jaundice. So you need to be counselled on the benefits of delayed cord clamping up against the small risk of jaundice and ensure your facility could treat baby with phototherapy should they need it. That's what I have read from ACOG. There isn't mention there about a different blood type being a no.

[@MicksMixedMedia]

Honestly I feel better about pooping on the table thinking about trying to poop postpartum lol I hear it's the worst thing

[@ameliakolesa2287]

What if I just want to pump and not directly breast feed because i want to do combination. Any tips?

[@monicataylor7414]

I had to solely pump because baby wouldn’t latch properly. I started pumping in the hospital and my milk came in as normal. I just pumped both breasts every time she ate so it would mimic her feeding schedule and I would have double stored up. I’m no expert but that was my experience.

[@salemthorup9536]

Cytotec has a garbage safety record though.

[@szfrj]

❤

[@bfam7492]

LOVE LOVE

[@PinkTikiria]

Gave birth to my first two sons in France at the hospital, regular vaginal births are attended by two midwives and a nursery nurse, that’s it. For the first one after almost 2 days with no results (3cm dilated only and lost my water 40h before) the intern showed up once I agreed to an epidural to avoid a C-section. Head of OB showed up like 5h after when they prepared for a C-section. Luckily didn’t need one as he finally decided to cooperate on the last try haha. Second birth I barely saw the midwife as she told me I was doing great and she was happy to stay but if I’d rather be alone with my husband she would leave us be. We just called her when I felt I needed to push to check if I was dilated enough and so she could catch the baby! Third birth was a home birth in Greece. Two amazing midwives who followed my every request (unfortunately hospital births are not at all the same here, mostly bad experiences from what I heard- hence the home birth), and again no doctor. Doctors are a great option to have for emergencies, but when things are going well midwives know better and most importantly they adapt to you and your needs, not the other way around! When I was looking for a hospital in Greece and asked a few questions I was flabbergasted at the answers I was getting, for example when I asked if I could give birth on my knees they said I would have to lie down on my back because I should think of the doctor’s confort (no shit they literally told me that)… 😳

[@monicataylor7414]

Your Greek doctors sound like our American doctors. Not as harsh but I was told I had to push on my back to make it easier to catch the baby. This was after I was allowed to move wherever I wanted to labor. The hardest part and they put you on your back lol

[@lw6138]

I asked only that my baby not receive vaccines, or eye goop. I don't have an STD and my newborn seems pretty safe. The nurses changed towards me. They also didn't like that I breastfed. I went home after 24 hours. I would have loved another night in the hospital but I felt unwelcome. They really had no right. My son is vaccine injured. Maybe I have a better idea of what is good for my baby based on what happened to his brother, right? Anyway, that kid is 23 and has never had a single vaccine. Not even flu. And yes, he gets sick. Every October, near the end of the month, he gets a weird two day pukefest. He eats Halloween candy without restraint. But after that, nothing that they have a vaccine for.