BLACK KNIGHT SWORD & HOTLINE MIAMI (Zero Punctuation)

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Fast-talking Ben "Yahtzee" Croshaw reviews a new game each week in this animated series that combines informed critique with cutting humor. Watch the next episode of Zero Punctuation a week early, only on The Escapist.
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[@nurb101]

"IF YOU CAN DODGE A ROCK, YOU CAN DODGE DEATH!"

[@riddleblue-eyes8768]

That doesn't make any sense

[@Kuronii01]

@@riddleblue-eyes8768 Oddly enough, it sounds like a TwoSetViolin reference: "If you can play slow, you can play fast".

[@mossfoster5317]

Hotline mimi is one of the best indie games I have ever played! My only downside on the game is that FUCKING STEALTH LEVEL THAT TOOK ME SO FUCKING LONG!!!

[@Jacket430]

Surprisingly it took me.. 3 maybe 4 tries? Which i think is pretty fair! :D

[@mossfoster5317]

***** Yeah well done!

[@mcarpen89]

***** Yeah it was a little tricky but I had far more attempts at just about any other level in the game. It wasn't a huge pain, just a slight speed bump, which I got the feeling it was meant to be a speed bump.

[@mossfoster5317]

Ultimate K/D Yeah, I get you I think I'm just terrible at stealth!

[@erandbizati9662]

the thing that screwed me over is that damn headache you have after about 10 steps

[@TheFaithfulRedeemer]

"Killed a dozen guys while wearing a unicorn mask because a phone message told me to. Then I went home and played Hotline Miami was a pretty good game. 10/10" -Some guys review on Steam. I quoted it, you're welcome.

[@andrewtaulane9716]

"Gritty and realistic gameplay"-IGN

[@TheFaithfulRedeemer]

Andrew Taulane you... you gave a +1 to your own comment. People like you make me sick. *grabs unicorn mask*

[@andrewtaulane9716]

...Well, I'm screwed :/

[@potatolemon9442]

Hotline miami 2 coming out soon bitches, more virtual massacering whoo

[@caycekelley5728]

***** IT IS AMONGST US!

[@MrTombombodil]

"Brown Sweaty Racism" got me. 10/7

[@nicolasriveros943]

10/7? i would say more like a 9/11

[@juanpablomontalvo4715]

+Nicolás Riveros Brown sweaty racism That sounds like 7/11 if i ever heard it

[@HarryBillyBobGeorge]

Orange Nerd Crowbar Brown Sweaty Racism Blue Kleptomania Bow Green Stoic not-Lightsaber Black Renegade Penis Green Twink Shield Red Blue Jumpy Jump White hooded- wait a second Ezio what the fuck

[@lopey5035]

Just bought Hotline Miami 1 and 2 for $5 on steam. Bloody good fun

[@ACE_CMH]

Second one isn't that good compared to the first one

[@ACE_CMH]

Not really it had a bad ending

[@ACE_CMH]

It didn't feel like hotline Maimi

[@edgetables8300]

guess what, i pirated it bitch got it for free

[@lopey5035]

theinternetisgay shit dude your cool dude shit dude

[@am2160]

I got Magenta Nutcase Kitchen floor for a buck 50 on steam and boy do i feel like i ripped off the devs. Edit since this gets alot of thumb ups i might as well say hotline miami two was well worth the 15$ but you could probably catch it during a sale like i did the original.

[@Dakurar]

50? Really?

[@Discoh]

Picked up the combo pack for $5 a little while back. I get the same feeling.

[@roykennedy]

Fun fact: The devs said, "If you can't get Hotline Miami in your country just pirate it." Hell they even patched the pirated games quality to make it better for players.

[@MrAlexanderLang]

I can't wait for Orange Nerd Crowbar 3....xD

[@maestrozero117]

At this point I'm not quite sure if we'd even get one before the reboot.

[@matthew1882]

@@maestrozero117 well wait no longer lads cause Valve made a whole game to confirm it.

[@adains8819]

@@matthew1882 it'll take another decade to get here and it'll be 2 hours long

[@mitralingreyman5835]

Big oof.

[@bagamingshow]

So he liked Hotline Miami......Good.

[@naumsei6221]

Best comment...

[@yharnamenjoyer7648]

Good

[@CommissarChaotic]

Hotline Miami is a tune, it must be sung together...

[@BrotherofSteel935]

I just bought Hotline Miami with some Christmas money and it's one of the best games I played in a while. The song "Crystals" is one of my favorite in the game.

[@Turtleproof]

Hotline Miami is terrific, just remember to hold Shift most of the time. The collision detection is so bad that sometimes you can swing a baseball bat through someone's head or have multiple bullets go through someone, but most of the time it's Edge Of Tomorrow fight-die-revive fun. The soundtrack and story is great, everything gets even better in Hotline Miami 2.

[@Zyphon44]

The Story of Hotline Miami(to my understanding. Major spoilers ahead): Is this the "read more" bit yet? Good. Alright, so, at the center of everything is an organization known as "50 Blessings". You find pamphlets throughout the game, including one in Jacket's(the main character's) apartment before the first level. 50 Blessings is an ultra nationalistic organization. They find people to further their goals by spying on their members, finding the most unstable, and easily manipulated people. Jacket is one such person that they've contacted. This is never fully explained to him, and they send him the locations of Russian Mobsters to slaughter via "Hotline Miami", using a system so that these phone calls cannot possibly be traced back to them. Jacket is more than happy to kill the mobsters. It's suggested that "Beard", the guy who Jacket meets at the end of every level, is also working for 50 Blessings, hence his strange, indirect praise after each level, and giving Jacket free stuff. Eventually, after all the bloodshed, Jacket begins to slip into madness, reality becomes blurred, and he's becoming increasingly unstable. To remedy this problem, 50 Blessings replaces Beard with a man named Richter, who spies on Jacket, until breaking into his apartment, killing his girlfriend, and shooting him in the head, sending him into a coma. Jacket then loses his memory, and is confronted by three masked figures. Richard, a representation of himself, Don Juan, his girlfriend, and Rasmus, a mobster. Jacket then starts to remember the events that led him there, but in a surreal, blurred way(hence the presentation of the game), starting from his first job on April 8th, 1989. As he remembers all that he's done, he is periodically confronted by the masked figures. Jacket's character is brought across in a clever way. all three masked figures are part of his mind, so they all represent aspects of him, and parts of the story are told in how the environment changes from level to level. I have to respect how well done all this was. Eventually, Jacket wakes up form his coma, and escapes the hospital. He goes on a rampage, attacked the police station, and killing Richter, as well as stealing case files so that he can find whoever is behind everything. At this point, Jacket doesn't care what he has to do, but he wants to bring an end to everything. He goes deeper and deeper without understanding what is going on. 50 Blessings uses this to their advantage, and directs him toward the Mob Boss of the Russian Mafia in Miami. Jacket, not caring about having been manipulated, and only wanting everything to end, kills the mob boss, and the game ends. To give a clearer understanding of 50 Blessings, the game then shows an alternate, non-canon timeline, putting the player in the shoes of The Biker, a far more stable vigilante. The Biker wants out, but to do this, knows he must go after 50 Blessings. Being nothing more than a hired killer, he tracks down 50 Blessings, and tries to take them out. He finds out how they created to Hotline so as not to be tracked, and whereas in the main game Jacket is sent to stop him and kills him, in the alternate time line, it's The Biker who kills Jacket. From this point, The Biker goes to confront 50 Blessings, and talks to the two janitors at Jacket's apartment building, who are only two members of the large organization. The "normal" ending has the two janitors say that it was all just a game to them, and they were just having some fun. Going back and collecting all the little shiny squares gives you the "secret" ending, in which Biker hacks into the computer first, and finds out enough information about the organization to properly confront them. They admit that they are a very large organization, attacking various different political groups from Russia to destroy the American-Russo Coalition, forcing the two countries into a war, hoping for America to crush Russia and display their superiority to the world.

[@Zyphon44]

That One Guy That Likes Top Hats Yep, doesn't mean that people will stop calling him Jacket though.

[@pampofski8751]

Mate did richter kill beard?

[@Zyphon44]

Pofski That would appear to be the case, but really, nothing that we see from Jacket's perspective can be seen as 100% true, he kind of lost it after killing Biker. :P

[@Zyphon44]

Pofski Though, both Beard and Richter were confirmed to be playable characters in Hotline Miami 2, so maybe we'll have a clearer answer then.

[@MartinSawyer]

So Biker ending is a non canon timeline. Thanks for the explanation bro!.

[@I_am_ENSanity]

3:56 That's pretty much the noise I made!

[@Ward1706]

"Trial and err- Restart, try again!"

[@TheJackMouse]

Yahtzee, the assassin of games, I'm glad you spared my favorite game of all time, Hotline Miami, and for this I thank you.

[@petergreen5047]

Well, the game has to be innovating and good so it was spared for a reason.

[@zeta4334]

Hotline Miami sounds like my kinda game. Retro + Fast Paced + Bloody Massacre = HOLY SHIT THIS IS MY SHIT Where can I get this wonderful sounding game?

[@Bonchanoize]

Steam or PSN as far as I know

[@davidjambedebois3330]

Pirate Bay

[@TerrmediaReturns]

David Jambedebois (- - )

[@davidjambedebois3330]

TerrmediaReturns melon

[@zeta4334]

OK, I'm playing it right now and it is.......FUCKING AMAZING

[@MrSmiley-en1ej]

funny how i spent more sweat in hotline miami 1 & 2 than i do when i go outside

[@AhmedHassan-ru4uz]

Wait you go out?!?!?!?

[@TheMuchEpicIdiot]

Yes tell me what the outside is like

[@vhvelazquez7187]

out to the restroom and the kitchen.

[@Secundussy]

+Joe Chu I've heard the graphics are alright.

[@repodan12]

More than a peado in a nursery.

[@somethingironicetc.807]

3:18 that image sums up the game really good. :D

[@VanguardFencer]

I really enjoyed Magenta Nutcase Kitchenfloor. I found out the AI is very exploitable. Just make a loud noise behind a door and they'll come at you. Then grab a melee weapon and just hack em all. Still, its no fun that way. BANZAI!!!

[@EdanR]

Shit, man, I do that in Half-Life. Just crouch next to an open door with your SPAS-12 and blast the Combine soldiers one by one.

[@VanguardFencer]

Edan R Come to think of it, I did that too. Its always better to bait enemies into a trap rather than go after them

[@neoman289151]

Can't wait for H.M. 2, the first one was so much fun.

[@caycekelley5728]

It has arrived.

[@ratthew8071]

Cayce Kelley And it's oddly disappointing.

[@degiguess]

ラッキージェイミー ***** I like it its not as good as the first but its far from disappointing

[@killingfeveronline_archives]

ラッキージェイミー My first hotline miami experience is with the sequel and I freaking loved it, honestly. I will give Hotline Miami 1 a try, but the second installment is pretty damn great despite some of it's issues.

[@TheMightyP00tis]

***** I do agree with this, though the game was still fun the character-specific levels should have made the level design better, not worse tbh

[@castle9165]

When he said you can measure quality by how quick you respawn I knew he’d love Hotline Miami.

[@Phish89]

just got hotline Miami and the sword thing really does work

[@Crowley9]

What do console games have against being able to load a saved game during gameplay?

[@blitzburn2871]

I think it is less a console game thing and more about Suda having delusions about difficulty automatically justifyin awful game design. Because while there is still a craving for challenging games, most people does not know how to make them. Any developer can make a game hard, but few can craft a game that is both challenging and enjoyable.

[@raestar7454]

nothing I play ps4 and it has games that save pretty often actually.

[@gavindillon1486]

Most games i know of are fine with saving and loading.

[@caycekelley5728]

And here comes Hotline Miami 2!

[@fearanger1]

One of my friends actually got addicted to Hotline Miami... He's stopped playing it now but I think he's managed to become a tad bit crazy now.

[@Anans1_Spyd3r]

That Cricket reference made my day considering cricket is the second largest played global sport which was dominated by non-European, American or Asian region for a great run.

[@chefrowlet]

"Magenta Nutcase Kitchen-Floor" Just... Yes! Win.

[@PrettyPinkPersephone]

As a Hotline Miami fanatic. Magenta nutcase kitchenfloor is my new favorite name for it

[@josephstanhope8054]

Wish the sequel wasn't Hotline Miami 2 but instead Hotline (insert city here). Maybe a Hotline Detroit with a funky 70s soundtrack or a Hotline Chicago set in prohibitions times with a jazz infused sound 🤷‍♂️

[@baritonoid]

That "new" guitar riff at the end there is honey. Thanks, Ian.

[@OldJerzyDevil]

05:37 Best use of math ever! Had to screenshot that for future reference.

[@FatherTime89]

You know that if Yahtzee recommends a game it's something special and indeed I had a lot of fun with Hotline Miami. Can't wait for the sequel.

[@JakTheGuardian]

Bloody-Red Murder-Man Shuriken-Lightening-Gun. Man, I like this naming system.

[@cablekibble2942]

I tried hotline miami about a year ago and, despite my affinity for trial-and-errquickrestart games, I found it inplayable due to some mechanical discrepancies, like how for some reason the mouse moves with my character, and some confusions like the finnickiness of picking up and throwing melee weapons. I think I’m willing to give it another chance now though, since no one can shut up about how great it is.

[@burntivoryking558]

Hey man the Black Knight Sword is pretty good in Dark Souls

[@burntivoryking558]

Pope Funktastic VI Its definitely better for an experienced player on a quality build with that tasty c/c scaling. But for new players, any Black Knight weapons are a guaranteed easy playthrough

[@physe8052]

"I am so fucked in the head that my frontal lobe is a bell-end."

[@Frostuin]

[...] is [Essentially*] a bellend

[@lisameakin1]

Lol that executioners blade on the upgrades stripped away bit xD

[@a131830]

Hotlne Miami is one of those games that you will always remember.

[@MatiPryjomko]

I love Yellow Critic Knob gags.

[@INGLEBOP]

I LOVE the longer outro

[@MaAlGon3]

Cyborg Ninja Katana, Space Marine Gun, Dark Rich-Man Batarangs, Green Elf Boomerang, Blood Inmate Chainsaw, Brunette Survivor Knife, Grey Nanosuit Bow. That's all I've got.

[@romxxii]

a good thing Yahtzee's made a Dreamweb Let's Play, otherwise I wouldn't have recognized that reference to such an obscure British cyberpunk point-and-click surreal murder simulator.

[@spinnenente]

i loved magenta nutcase kitchen floor

[@lesbaker7379]

I approve of the new naming system.

[@scarygamesrocks24]

the knife in Hotline Miami is AWESOME

[@TheRaveous]

Hotline Miami 2 confirmed WOO!

[@chris1vidyt]

I know, people have such a fondness for someone who they will never be that it makes them look like they are trying to resuscitate a dying old man with a tire iron all while telling the paramedics that he is doing a great job and is as good as they are, also the old man's kid is the paramedic.

[@kerbal666]

Frothing bollock milkshakes! I now have a new curse to teach my kid brother :)

[@rotom9199]

red plumer feet ,green guy in sute gun, the list goes on.

[@AandDnetwork]

Oooh! Oooh! Try this one! Black Suited Bar-code! Grey Realistic Zombies! Green Undead Massacre! Tan Apocalyptic Gambling! Blue Minecraft Shooting! Purple 2-Planed Minecraft!

[@qdllc]

Had to double check. 2:50. Miami doesn’t have 3 Is.

[@bladesofseven]

Same here. I also thought Gray Russian Trains was Metro 2033, and Gray Nutcase Plastic-bag may have been Manhunt.

[@hdips497]

loving that cat on sternum simile, true in effect to every cat owner/gamer.

[@colinchildress1251]

I saw the title and thought it was going to be about Dark Souls lol!

[@HamTheBacon]

Get Dunked.

[@angeldeb82]

LOLed at the whole thing! Especially with the stabbing the dogs and the weird names for video games! Oh, and Call of Duty 3 eating up dollar bills before dropping off to sleep! XD

[@atlerthedark3639]

Yahtzee says that it's easier to just bumble through the levels than to plan them out. And a lot of people seem to agree with him. If that's the case, then I'm either really smart or really unlucky, because I planned out virtually all of them and could barely manage to kill two people if I ever tried to blitz it. That said, it's a great game, but I can't help but notice that it builds its greatness on superb gameplay, only to do everything in its power to reverse that gameplay towards the end. For instance, most levels consist of stealthily killing most people and massacring the last few when they have no reinforcements. Then they have a series of levels with forced combat and (as Yahtzee mentioned) forced stealth. Then towards the very end there's a few levels where you can't switch out weapons with the people you killed, which was not only pivotal, but essential for the earlier majority of the game.

[@Sylumdota]

That was a good murloc impression yahtzee

[@RetroEjit]

Never heard of Black Knight Sword before this review but Hotline Miami was the perfect blend of retro hard and addictive replayability thats right up my alley, I cant wait for Hotline Miami 2 or should I say Magenta Nutcase Kitchenfloor 2

[@whitemanfromtown8888]

Flatline is easy. Besides, I like the calmness of the level and the song in the background. Gives you a break after murdering 50 mobsters before going to murder all of Miami PD.

[@pyroparagon8945]

It's Trauma. Deadline is the mission with the van flying through the doors at the end

[@GoodRogue]

@@pyroparagon8945 And Flatline is the title of a song by Scattle that plays during Trauma. So yeah, he wasn't that very wrong here. :D

[@pyroparagon8945]

@@GoodRogue I know, I have the album.

[@Secret72062]

You may actually be psychotic for that opinion

[@skeletonking2501]

It felt like a nauseating headache which was very accurate to what Jacket must have felt

[@crazyspireman]

I lost it at Rooftop Asian Jumping

[@phil_cassidy]

For some reason I couldn't stop laughing after the Red Dead reference...

[@melvynlennard]

More imaginative than naming a game after the main character...

[@Phe0niz]

Imagination? In a shooter? But imagination means creativeness and originality!

[@DaInsano]

Holy Duck! A 720p Zero Punctuation Video!

[@Jessimo223]

Black Knight Sword sounds alot like Maximo: Ghosts To Glory (a game no-one has heard of) Where you can only lock 3 'perks' with one of the first you recieve being a basic 2 hit combo. When you die, you lose any that aren't in the lock slots.

[@ZelddaLinkFreak]

Agreed, I lost it when I Bust through a door and slam one gaurd into the wall with it, bludgeon the next with a lead pipe and duck out of the room as his friend comes into the room to check on the noise, Throw some boiling water into his face, steal his gun and clear the next room out by pinning their internal organs to the wall.

[@MeekahMania]

I couldn't hold back any longer near the end and lost it

[@hebrewgoldman2697]

Hotline Miami has one the best stories

[@roreksr5147]

Bioshock is System Shock where instead of upgrading via machines (System) you upgrade via genetics (Bio). Beyond that, both have lightning throwing. That's how I figure it.

[@MapleFlame99]

Reminds me of a fast version of a channel I used to watch. Angry Video Game Nerd. Had a catchy theme song, he did.

[@SPEP363]

Me too! And maybe it could rhyme with something along the lines of "Hax Slain".

[@BlargleWargle]

"Frothing Bollock Milkshakes" -Ben Croshaw

[@StallordD]

"Bloody windows" describes my entire playthrough in 2 words.

[@plagueman049]

Well, the entire review of Hotline Miami checks out. Music critiques are subjective, but, we already know that. Funny but down to the point enough for people that wanna buy it. Yes, I'm aware I'm 7 years late to this video.

[@Kristiants1]

3:57 THAT SOUND LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL

[@JanoyCresvaZero]

I'm genuinely glad he enjoyed Hotline Miami. Not only is it a fun romp into motiveless mass murder, but it really helps you question why you're doing whatever it is you're doing.

[@BlueCosmology]

+Joshua Davies Yes he is.

[@IcameIsawIread]

No he lives in Brisbane, he mentions the floods and the rating refusal for Saints row 4

[@BlueCosmology]

A hell of a lot of people don't live where they are from.

[@Threnan17]

***** He is... or was... he moved to Australia years ago from England.

[@PowerJugs]

*Whistle* Check out the extra pixel of sharpness.

[@TheRainySky]

Its actually a take on the makers early work Systemshock, which was a cyberpunk game.

[@Never_heart]

2:27 love the silent hill 2 reference

[@weedspagon4522]

Watching this while stoned is oddly comforting

[@Orrkist]

I both knew and didn't know the same ones as you - although I think British Assassin Teleporting might be Dishonored, and Brown Horror hiding might be Amnesia. I think what you thought was Amnesia - Darkness Writer Flashlight - was actually Alan Wake

[@xenosphobatic]

Excellent summary of Hotline Miami.

[@DesertCavalier]

After Lollipop Chainsaw, Yahtzee asked for a game with a two-word summary. Black Knight Sword = "Knight battles."

[@thrupert]

The boiling water weapon, in hotline miami, kills on touch. You wouldn't need to smash his head against the ground.

[@OvermasterP]

By that logic, the game Fire Space Cowboy Pirate Ninja Diamond Golden Titanium Platinum Missle Fist Punch Box Shoot Gun Out must be the marketing team's pride and joy.

[@he110me]

the Biology of your body is being shocked to hell in BioShock, that's what

[@wallybal1297]

You arent an alien ... are you? Pulls out squirt gun

[@InsertEpicness]

That's where the "Infinite" part comes in. Infinite refers to the infinite realities. Its called Bioshock because its of coarse a Bioshock game.

[@TH3LAST5TAND]

just PERFECT...

[@7Blau7]

i like the new naming system

[@doorto6152]

I've noticed that he's started saying out right if he recommends a game or not, and I kinda like it

[@Maksymaxi]

Damn, hotline miami really was pretty damn good! thanks yahtzee :D

[@falloutghoul1]

I think the term you're looking for is 'Chronoshock'.

[@joeldunsdon]

Hotline Miami, a recommendation from zero punctuation is well deserved here.

magenta nutcase kitchen floor sounds fun.

[@colinhawley8050]

GRAARGHL!!!!!!!! (beserker mode activated)

[@50_Lizardss]

I like ho w accurate the review of hotli- I mean , Magenta Nutcase Kitchen floor actually is

[@florbengorben7651]

I absolutely love Hotline Miami and it's sequel. Not only is the gameplay excellent but the use of unreliable narrators in both games is done in such a way that isn't frustrating but instead sort of gives a big looming "what the fuck" over every moment. I'd say the second game is better in terms of story but you need to play the first one in order to fully experience the second. Great game(s) 9-10/10

[@user-tw7jd9pk5v]

BLACK KNIGHT SWORD (A.K.A) We want to be Dark Souls.

[@DankLordDemaar]

FUCK Best thing is that in Dark souls there is a sword called Black Knight Sword. darksouls.wikia.com/wiki/Black_Knight_Sword

[@user-tw7jd9pk5v]

Didn't ask for anyone's opinion but okay.

[@blarg2429]

+FUCK And no-one asked for yours either. Should that stop you from giving it? +SPEED WEED And your name is "speed weed", so you're one to talk. Calm the _fuck_ down. :P

[@E_blanknamehere]

blarg2429 i forgot about this comment its so old but whats wrong with my name? at least it's not fuck.

[@blarg2429]

SPEED WEED For one, caps-lock is not cruise control for cool. Observe: knowyourmeme.com/photos/751672-caps-lock. And lest you think I'm getting off topic, bear in mind that your username itself is in all-caps, not just 75% of your comment I replied to. I'm pointing this detail out because I'm worried you might actually miss it otherwise. Secondly, the only thing wrong with calling oneself "fuck" is that it's childish; this flaw is, in my opinion, something it has in common with your name. If SPEED WEED is just fine and dandy, why object so strenuously to FUCK?

[@OvermasterP]

That's a much better name by far.