Boss Up and Change Your Life - Make the best first impression

Boss Up and Change Your Life - Make the best first impression - Get respect

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Күн бұрын

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@frankvaden772 Ай бұрын

Women often use a rising inflection at the ends of their sentences. Don't do that any more if you want to take charge of any situation. I was once in charge of a huge convention and nobody was taking me seriously until I began to 'state' my arrangements instead of seeming to be asking permission all the time. It was a valuable lesson, I got to assume the leadership role and the convention was a smashing success!

@CarnivoreSeventyOne 2 жыл бұрын

You’ve been needed young lady for a long time! Tell the truth like you’ve been doing. Love this 😁

@unblahyourself 2 жыл бұрын

Thank you!!!

@CarnivoreSeventyOne 2 жыл бұрын

I am keeping my standards 😁

@CarnivoreSeventyOne 2 жыл бұрын

I love the look! Actually that’s the classic look 😁

@katechadbournebard 6 ай бұрын

Thank you so much for this video. So helpful and clear and kind and exactly what I have needed to hear. As a creative person in academia, I’ve always tried to stay true to myself by wearing my free spirited, artsy clothes, but I have learned there is a price to pay. I remember sitting in a circle of teachers, all of whom were wearing suits. We were asked a question and each person answered in turn. When the facilitator came to me she simply skipped over me as though I weren’t there. I don’t think she meant to do that; I think that I was functionally invisible in that environment because of my clothes. The irony was that the department chair said I was the best teacher in the program, but I never dressed the part. I was rebelling against what I saw as a boring tyranny of corporatized education- but I see now that it didn’t serve me. What I’m taking from all this is that if you want to succeed, dress for the game you are playing. Thank you again.

@unblahyourself 6 ай бұрын

I mostly made this video because I have gotten in my own way so many times!

@JehanineMelmoth 3 ай бұрын

You probably inspired many of your students to be individual and true to their own style. As an academic you were an authority figure, and you almost certainly made a good impression on those who matter most in academia - the students.

@katechadbournebard 3 ай бұрын

@@JehanineMelmoth Thank you! That’s very kind of you to say, and I agree with you completely: our students matter most. It’s a joy and a privilege to teach them!

@loosilu 7 ай бұрын

This came at exactly the right time. After all of these years of being told I need to follow certain rules for dressing for work, you are the FIRST one who explained WHY and made it make sense.

@loosilu 6 ай бұрын

Diana, to be more specific, I was always irritated about following rules because I thought it was about fitting in. When you explained it in terms of distracting from your ideas, that made so much sense.

@CarnivoreSeventyOne 2 жыл бұрын

Yes! High standards. And people will not like it.

@gailwilliams5278 2 жыл бұрын

This is excellent information, and comprehensive.

@unblahyourself 2 жыл бұрын

Thanks Gail!

@edennis8578 3 ай бұрын

I wish I could "like" this video a thousand times.

@kimsnader8777 7 ай бұрын

I agree that whatever your work dress culture, keeping yourself and your ideas the focus instead of your clothing is key. My "boss" wardrobe move is "the third piece", as in, a top, a bottom, and either a blazer, a cardigan or a crisp overshirt/shacket. I have worked in manufacturing, the creative fields, the knowledge field and traditional business environments (all very different types of work dress culture). Dark neutrals are bossier than light. Monochrome and subtle patterns are bossier than brilliant colors and bold patterns. Excellent tailoring on crisp-lined pieces is bossier than flowy, sensuous fabrics. Don't forget handbags, totes, briefcases, footwear, outerwear and umbrellas. Sturdy, durable, no-nonsense accessories with clean lines and few embellishments that are appropriate for the context speak "boss". Nothing is worse than creating the boss illusion, only to destroy it with a trendy backpack, a juvenile umbrella, worn shoes, or any accessory more appropriate for clubbing or a picnic, or something that creates a hazard or an obstacle in performing your work.

@unblahyourself 7 ай бұрын

I think people should read this comment instead of watching my video!

@loosilu 7 ай бұрын

THis is my struggle. In terms of colors, I'm a light Spring, and oh man. Darker neutrals fight against me. They make me look like a pale lab mouse. Navy looks ok, but I wore navy for 12 freaking years in Catholic school, and when I wear it, I instantly turn 14 years old. If I wear a navy blazer, cardigan, or trousers, you might as well stuff me in a locker. I'm currently trying to work out what to do, but I suspect it will be shades of gray.

@kimsnader8777 7 ай бұрын

@@loosilu I hear you, and understand. I've known some light spring folks. Wear the darkest of the neutrals that suit your coloring. That will probably be taupes, rich browns, lighter charcoal grays and deeper chambray blues. Wear the light, bright colors that suit you best in your blouse or a scarf close to your face. A jacket in a menswear tiny pinstripe or herringbone fabric may strike the balance you need between dark neutral and the sun-bleached tones that are best for you.

@kimsnader8777 7 ай бұрын

@@unblahyourself Thank you. Having worked in so many different fields, it took a while for me to understand how "the boss" at a particular job was so easy to identify. Hint: it's rarely the one who dresses to impress about their wealth. It's the one who dresses to command respect and be in control of themselves, their team, and their managers' expectations without saying a word.

@loosilu 7 ай бұрын

@@kimsnader8777 This is enormously helpful. Thank you so much!

@latinaalma1947 3 ай бұрын

Well having been a university administrator and professor. I dressed like a "boss" because I was one in the 80s and 90s. The strong shoulder of a blazer helped with toning down my cheerleader body. Hems at the knee. Small heeled pumps/court shoes. I bought two dark blazers one eool one summer,two dark straight skirts at the knee, button up shirts when I got my first professorial job then each year I would buy very high qualwork wardity blazers one summer and one winter each year as needed. I had a great work wardrobe and it lasted me the entire 20 years. I did NOT buy fashion trends for work.

@modgirl3292 7 ай бұрын

Excellent advice here especially for recent grads. I always kept 2 blazers in my office (or, car), a heavier one for cold temps & one for summer) that way you can always throw one over your shoulders if you go to a meeting. Keep a lint roller & little sewing kit with dbl-sided tape 4 wardrobe emergencies. The inner work of doing your work is essential; the more you know the less you will fill up conversation with the ums, ahs, & the most-dreaded-word that shows your immaturity “LIKE.” Carry a business folder to corral your papers/laptop. No funky tote bags, think structure. You don’t have to pay for expensive leather ones, since there are plenty of others available now. And, please cover your tattoos.

@d.-beck7205 6 ай бұрын

A decent pencil or fountain pen, if you keep notes by hand. A spare light and a spare dark TShirt in your office drawer in case of spilled coffee or tomato sauce also helps. Shoes with moderate heels or flats, in which you can stand firm and walk well.

@cherylmclin4509 2 ай бұрын

This is a great video. It is helpful to be clear about professional vs personal style. I used to feel conflicted about expressing my personal style at work - like I was not being true to myself if I didn't wear my more fun stuff to work. I found your video last night and it made a lot of sense and it helped me. I'm not conflicted anymore. Thank you!

@marylopez3777 7 ай бұрын

Thank you Diana. You are so wise, patient, kind, generous, and realistic. Be the Boss when bossness is required. Be the Queen Baddie all the rest of the time!

@marylopez3777 7 ай бұрын

Thank you Diana. You are so wise, patient, generous, caring, and realistic. Be the Boss when bossness is needed, be the Fun Feminine Queen Baddie ALL the rest of the time!

@unblahyourself 7 ай бұрын

Right, we don't need to boss all the time! Sometimes we need to Baddie!

@jaynethorne4540 5 ай бұрын

Thank you so much for this information. I also want to share the psychology of color. Darker coolers, especially Navy blue invoke a feeling of authority. You instinctively chose that color!

@mireille1594 2 жыл бұрын

I think you are bringing important points, Diana. I would add that it also depends on the field you are in. A lawyer boss would dress differently than someone in the arts, for example; in some areas, creativity and personality are important.

@unblahyourself 2 жыл бұрын

I agree even though I was definitely in the arts in these situations. I was a music producer, which is a male dominated field and it was tough to be heard and taken seriously as a woman. I was actually asked, "so do you do all if this yourself? " in one meeting. If I were an artist or some other kind of creative though, then these same rules would not apply. Then I would get really crazy with my look. But most opportunities in this world are not that.

@edennis8578 3 ай бұрын

I think you would be surprised. Most successful people in the arts have not and do not dress wildly, certain notable outliers notwithstanding. For painters, all black is common. So is business casual. I saw a makeover of a painter who dressed wildly. Very punk, with face studs and bold colors to boot. The public were afraid to approach her, and the only men who wanted to date her were unemployed punkers. The stylists put her in button down shirts and khakis, took her studs out, and gave her natural hair and makeup. It was the girl next door look. Immediately, people began to approach her as she worked in public on a painting. She was also able to date men who were stable and had good jobs. Maybe that isn't for everyone, but the crazy artist look can be self defeating.

@JMLin-l6q 6 ай бұрын

Really impressive presentation. Couldn't agree with you more. Local news stations across the country would do well to have their female presenters view this video.

@4Renee9 6 ай бұрын

Excellent video. I used this technique for many years before retiring. A wonderful reminder ! Thank you!❤️🌸

@amyhayes8965 7 ай бұрын

Dealing with this now. Thank you.

@unblahyourself 7 ай бұрын

Yes boss! ❤

@leitanewman8991 6 ай бұрын

Great tips! Thanks

@cherylshiflett4384 6 ай бұрын

I long dagger nails or brightly colored nails.

@marycash4933 7 ай бұрын

It really depends on the environment of the situation you find yourself in. I thought a little formality was in order so I wore a basic black sheath dress with a black blazer and I was asked " what are you so dressed up for?" It was a job interview. Go figure.

@unblahyourself 7 ай бұрын

Lol then what were you supposed to wear??

@neanea1173 5 ай бұрын

Yes! I am a Legal Assistant. Back in the day, we dressed up! In 2021 I went to the job interview of the job I have today..nice skirt and blouse, low heels...I got "You don't need to dress up...don't wear heels... They Were Low. I wear dresses, etc if I want. Culture has gone too far the other way. BTW. I don't miss sand colored hose in 90 degree heat. 😂

@melindad.217 4 ай бұрын

This video is brilliant! 🎉

@unblahyourself 4 ай бұрын

😘

@user-ov4wr5yu4r 7 ай бұрын

That's not an A line skirt. It's a dirndl skirt. But, I get your point, much too soft and fluffy, and colorful.

@plw7930 5 ай бұрын

It has an A line shape.

@schoolingdiana9086 7 ай бұрын

I hear what you’re saying on gold jewelry, but as a Native American, gold jewelry makes me look like my liver is dying off. Looking terminally ill isn’t going to send the right impression.

@unblahyourself 7 ай бұрын

lololol ok no gold for you! Native American skin looks sooooo good in silver. Definitely do you! ❤

@edennis8578 3 ай бұрын

In that case, pearls would be the way to go. Freshwater pearls are affordable and come in subtle colors as well as white and black. Or cubic zirconia set in silver, plated in rhodium or platinum or white gold.

@maryokeefe5351 6 ай бұрын

Lots of wise advice here. As an executive, it is very difficult to offer this type of advice to young women in the workplace when the way they present themselves is not helping them. I need to be me (purple hair, large visible tattoos, weird piercings)! I have great tits and want all the men in the office to see them! People can be very quick to call discrimination so most bosses won't take the risk of pointing out where they are going wrong, so they say nothing and the person ends up marginalized and can't understand why nobody listens to their ideas.