How did you like this video? Would love to know your thoughts!
@toddhaydon7834 ай бұрын
Great story! Do you have a story about having kindness and compassion for all beings?
@stevejordan95054 ай бұрын
Beautifully said and so simple to understand.
@jiayijiayi72814 ай бұрын
very enlightening. ❤
@DG-uh8uv4 ай бұрын
Thank you so much for this video! I’m a shadow coach (the work developed by Carl Jung). This is such a simple and beautiful way of explaining how things trigger us, why they trigger us, and that it is all from within us. We cannot control others…or an empty boat. we can work on learning about ourselves, and why we react the way we do. We can learn to have compassion for ourselves and for others.
@pauldow16484 ай бұрын
Resonance
@spiritinflux4 ай бұрын
“Anger is the punishment we give ourselves for other peoples actions.”
@michaelmccoy17944 ай бұрын
That Is an outstanding nugget of proverbial wisdom to emphasize the lesson of the monk's tale..😊
@Dreamskaype4 ай бұрын
I'm a therapist and I often use a variant of that to help my clients rethink their anger. "Feeling anger is punishing yourself for a crime someone has committed against you."
@HiddenBrilliance3 ай бұрын
Ooooooh.
@ProgressMastery3 ай бұрын
Interesting
@little.bear3443 ай бұрын
@@Dreamskaype Hi. Can therapy help with insomnia? Also, can people be prescribed something for insomnia and have therapy?
@encompassvideo54294 ай бұрын
I took an anger management course during covid. Best thing I ever did. I stopped taking everything personally and began to see things from all different perspectives. I never knew that a simple course like that, perhaps two months in length, could have such a positive benefit for me and my family. It really works, and I recommend it. Don't let anger control you like I did. Life is too short. Do yourself and your family a big favor. And believe me, I was the guy ( maybe like you) who thought that anger management was for wife-beaters, criminals, etc. I was wrong and I am glad I did it. Try it!
@PeterPepper934 ай бұрын
Underrated comment
@little.bear3443 ай бұрын
I'm angry that I can't have self control. All I want is to not be angry and that itself makes me angrier because I am rarely in control of my emotions. I'm getting help but it's been difficult because I'm poor and don't have access to good mental health care. It's a nightmare because I also have chronic insomnia, which makes controlling my emotions a thousand times more difficult. I'm trying, day by day.
@ProgressMastery3 ай бұрын
Appreciate you sharing this
@DistracticusPrime3 ай бұрын
@@little.bear344 I'm no expert, but I noticed in myself a positive change cycle where I gradually slept better as my emotional discipline improved, and better sleep made it easier to respond instead of react. It took work and changes in both areas to see results in either.
@little.bear3443 ай бұрын
@@DistracticusPrime Thank you, that's actually insightful. If you don't mind me asking, did you see a therapist and did you have anything prescribed to help you sleep or what methods did you use to get sleep, besides disciplining and controlling your emotions? Reaction versus response- I also appreciate you saying that. It's very true.
@JDavidHopkins4 ай бұрын
I was worse than that monk. One time, I was walking my dog on a leash & I saw 2 unleashed dogs hanging around a man working on a car. I thought, “What an irresponsible dog owner!” & walked away self-righteously condemning him. Then, a few minutes later a women drove up in a car & said she had lost her 2 dogs & asked if I had seen them. I realized the man was not the owner & I was falsely condemning him. What a stooge I was!
@eabutler68614 ай бұрын
why does a dog need to be leashed if they are not a nuisance .... how would you like to be leashed? Respect all life.
@infoseeker4 ай бұрын
@@eabutler6861 Many places throughout the USA have laws requiring dogs to be on a leash. Dogs should only be off-leash on the owner's property and nowhere else. It's also a safety issue as well.
@eabutler68614 ай бұрын
@@infoseeker i was kind of kidding, but America is a damn police state these days.... go find some killers and leave the dogs alone and let me choose to not use a seat belt if I'm driving 1 minute away...lol. again all jokes but it can get tiresome, china doesn't even bother people for small things like that.
@sjckb044 ай бұрын
Well your also a bit of a Karen as dog owners have every right not to have the dog leashed as they would be on the owners property!
@theatomic4304 ай бұрын
@@sjckb04 You're.
@franksullivan18734 ай бұрын
As someone told me long ago ,”you cannot control what others do but you can control yourself.”
@grayrecluse74964 ай бұрын
Not exactly,true.
@SusannaSaunders4 ай бұрын
That that right there shows the total stupidity of it all. Nothing you do makes a shit load of difference.
@mmo53664 ай бұрын
Some people can’t even control themselves.
@BC-wj8fx4 ай бұрын
Someone told me that too. That someone was a covert abuser, attempting to silence me when I was going to expose the group of corrupt co-abusers that this person was linked to. Abusers love trying to convince you that you can't stop the abuse, you can only go off and heal yourself. This is a devilish deception. YOU CAN influence people. Everyone absolutely influences the people around them. You can't 100% absolutely control what others do but you can 99% influence what they try to do in future. If you just silently take abuse without showing anger, they will most likely do it again and again and again. If you instead push back and show you won't stand for it, most likely they will stop or at minimum moderate, hesitate or delay the next abuse. :)
@AlterAbility4 ай бұрын
You can control yourself in the sense that your opinions of good and bad are entirely up to you because no one can force you to hold an opinion (i.e., belief, judgment). It will likely take time to undo many of the opinions that cause us to mentally suffer.
@jamesbrady21562 ай бұрын
My son has been trying to teach me this lesson for years. Now that I have seen your video I see the lesson I must learn AND my son's efforts to teach it to me. Thank you.
@timothyjones744 ай бұрын
I was taught by my Sicilian wife this process. It works well when confronted by an empty boat with or without intent.”Just because someone or something opens a bag, you don’t have to jump in”😂
@little.bear3443 ай бұрын
I think all mothers teach a similar lesson when you do something wrong because your friend did it and they say, "So if your friend jumps off a bridge, you'll do it too?"
@jsmall106714 ай бұрын
I had never heard that allegory before. I like it a lot actually. A saying that was meaningful to me was: "Others don't make you angry. You allow yourself to get angry over what other people do."
@ProgressMastery4 ай бұрын
Exactly!
@kiraflash45964 ай бұрын
You wouldn’t believe how much it angers people when they can’t anger you..
@nickiemcnichols53974 ай бұрын
You will no longer be brought to anger when you don’t desire to anger others.
@ProgressMastery4 ай бұрын
Truly!
@hobowithawaterpistol90704 ай бұрын
It’s funny how that works, almost every situation good or bad, people want you to feel like they do in the moment!
@gomer28133 ай бұрын
It angers them more when you are angry.
@tigalbaby4 ай бұрын
Removing bitterness, anger and hate from within is so necessary but so challenging. Yet we must cleanse these harmful emotions from our minds to achieve deep inner peace. Gratitude to the Buddha for this wisdom . May those empty boats we encounter always remain neutral and harmless vessels to our emotions. Om mani padme hum .
@HocusPocus69694 ай бұрын
There is nothing wrong with anger, it is a natural emotion, you will never be “cleansed” of it or any other emotions. Its what you do with them that matters.
@its_me_dave4 ай бұрын
@@HocusPocus6969 Good luck with that ...🤣🤣🤣
@michaelmccoy17944 ай бұрын
@@its_me_dave it's not about luck, lad. I mean Dave. 😊
@little.bear3443 ай бұрын
@@HocusPocus6969Anger can be countered and diminished with more positive qualities and traits without bottling up the anger. I'm a firm believer in expression and anger is no exception but its expression should be constructive, not destructive.
@augustwest85593 ай бұрын
I learned this same lesson from the movie pale rider. It’s what people know about themselves that makes them afraid of others.
@ESLTeacherTom4 ай бұрын
Don't demonize anger. It's a life-saver. Just don't dwell there.
@barbaratruitt94844 ай бұрын
Thank you.
@Live-Life-Freely4 ай бұрын
Anger is a spirit that you can either feed or observe until it realizes that you won't engage in it's stupid emotional games. Most women live and thrive of off anger and men with anger are just like women. "Hell hath no fury..."
@Hurt-to-Healing4 ай бұрын
@@Live-Life-Freely and you are so better than women?
@pearljones53884 ай бұрын
Who is that empty boat that said men with anger are like women 😂 can we push it over the waterfall
@Senjinone4 ай бұрын
@@Live-Life-Freely Wrong. The goal is the right feeling at the right time in the right amount. Anger at the right time in the right amount is absolutly vaild and pretending otherwise is some fake masulinity bullshit. With that said, most people have the some part of that wrong.
@SusannahDKirksey4 ай бұрын
This story has completely shifted my perspective on the work that is before me right now in my life. I love the title of the story too, and find it a useful mantra when going into situations that could trigger me. Empty boat, empty boat, empty boat…
@SusannahDKirksey4 ай бұрын
“What begins with anger, ends in shame.” Benjamin Franklin
@superflea724 ай бұрын
I needed this today…thank you
@ProgressMastery4 ай бұрын
You are welcome
@mrsmirnoff87154 ай бұрын
But then the Monk saw someone on the bank of the lake who yelled to him, "Could you bring my boat back, I forgot to moor it!".
@morrisstewart15284 ай бұрын
And the monk quietly whispered... this mothafu...
@reallue4 ай бұрын
Or he saw his toxic ex had stolen tht boat, rowed all the way out to the middle of the lake, just to ram it into his boat as hard as she could, trying to sink his boat & ruin his day, if not his life, outa nothing but pure, unjustified spite. That's the boat that keeps running into me, anyway. It's definitely not empty. & it's hard to convince myself its not intentional, when she does it all the time
@paddlefar91754 ай бұрын
@@morrisstewart1528You Morris’s, are one funny dude!
@GBJHMVLCJ4 ай бұрын
@@morrisstewart1528 lmao
@ryandegrave89784 ай бұрын
Then the monk remembered that lakes have shores, not banks, and realized it was again all in his mind.
@gordonwalter42934 ай бұрын
Beautiful and deeply consistent with all of Buddhism but cleverly framed in Zen.
@Da_Xman4 ай бұрын
Isn't Zen the Japanese form of Buddhism?
@agrobeson64714 ай бұрын
From the ninth century CE, migrating to the Island Kingdom. Important to note here: it's practice is known as 'zazen', literally 'not Zen'. Difficult to speak of Zen ~ hence the parables. Yes, the strawberry was good.
@flemmingbisgaard5213 ай бұрын
I learnt almost a life time ago that all reactions to life is a choice. It has almost taken a lifetime to understand to act and not react.
@readplanet234 ай бұрын
And a blessed day to you. 🙏🏼
@ProgressMastery4 ай бұрын
Thank you
@Calidastas4 ай бұрын
Anger is your subconscious protecting and warning you. You may or may not need protecting in that moment, and it’s up to your wisdom and experience to know whether you do, but anger is a critical part of yourself. It is necessary and useful if managed properly.
@getmetoine4 ай бұрын
I think that is more like fear. Anger is, in my opinion, the result of feeling like control over the situation is taken away or something happening that feels unfair/ unjustified. Anger is the tool we use to recapture the previous situation: to regain what we think we are entitled to.
@hobowithawaterpistol90704 ай бұрын
Well said!
@hobowithawaterpistol90704 ай бұрын
@@getmetoineRight or wrong anger exist in all of all and it’s natural! I believe the action you attach to it is important!
@AlterAbility4 ай бұрын
@@hobowithawaterpistol9070 it is natural because it exists. However, it is based on ignorance. The boat should have hit me due to cause & effect, even if it was intentional. Anger comes from a dislike of reality. Something our mind judges as bad has happened, so now we’re angry. We prefer the boat not to get hit, so we decide to meditate with our eyes open while floating down the river. If we get hit, there’s no anger because we understand that this is reality, and disliking it causes mental suffering and, oftentimes, makes external outcomes worse due to negative emotion blocking rationality.
@hobowithawaterpistol90704 ай бұрын
@@AlterAbility Very true!
@Jimages_uk4 ай бұрын
Buddhism has so many good lessons to teach, but not all boats that hit you are empty, and if a boat is driven at you with intent, pretending it was empty is to delude both yourself and those who would wish to cause harm.
@Shawn-so3zk4 ай бұрын
An empty boat or one operated by another person are still the same: a factor outside of your control. Getting angry at someone running into your boat is as unnecessary as getting angry when an empty boat runs into you.
@sm55744 ай бұрын
The point is not their intent but our reaction. Whether they intend to cause us harm or not, our response is always our choice.
@patriciasalem36064 ай бұрын
Agree. Pretty sure the "boats" hitting the kids of Gaza aren't empty, nor did they "attract" this into their lives, as the video says. The same thing applies to victims of abuse and crime, etc. This philosophy would have them think that: a) it's all their fault; and b) to become righteously angry about it is wrong. I'm so over this toxic positivity and law of attraction crap.
@neelroy29184 ай бұрын
What the monk is doing is getting angry _when his eyes are still closed_ . That is imagining without knowing truth of the matter at hand (not "the" truth). I have done that so many times to know that if I would just look at the other side with "eyes open" as it were, I wont have to be miserable. Yes, people will have bad intentions (boats not empty) but this story can definitely cover those situations with one's state of "eyes closed". Perhaps the interpretation of the story is little far fetched. If you know the intention of next person, you could be justified in feeling what you feel I guess. But then again, how many times we know someone else's intention *for absolute certainty* ? Though I agree that sometimes it's just right in front of you.
@sm55744 ай бұрын
@@patriciasalem3606, the only thing I disagree with in this video is the idea of "good" and "bad" emotions. Emotions simply are. This has nothing to do with fault, and there's nothing "wrong" with becoming angry. The problem is when you think that others have the power to decide how you respond. They do not, but until we learn that, we are incapable of taking control of our lives.
@peterjhillier76593 ай бұрын
Excellent, I have learnt something positive this Morning that I will remember and share with others. Thank you for sharing.
@piper5526f4 ай бұрын
In other words you can’t control all circumstances, only your reaction to them.
@sammuis014 ай бұрын
Such wisdom.... I hope I'll remember this story/lesson forever and I'll try teaching my daughter this. She's only 9, but smart and sensitive enough to pick up on this truth I think.
@LovesLakes4 ай бұрын
Then you might enjoy more of the Buddha’s wisdom. It does not detract from or compete with any other religion you might follow.
@sjb1030523 ай бұрын
I think it’s true that emotions like anger and others originate within ourselves and we ultimately choose what and how we feel. While watching this I was reminded of my psychology studies in the early 70’s when we learned about Rational Emotive Therapy . Same teaching, different sources.
@TeddyCavachon4 ай бұрын
The best summary of Zen philosophy of finding balance I’ve seen is in the movie Siddhartha where is sitting on the bank of a river and a man on a boat who is tuning a string instrument says that if the string is too tight it will break but if too loose it will not play and the music is found in the middle. Zen isn’t about always being good but balancing the bad things life throws our way with good when the opportunity presents itself, like smiling and tossing out a compliment about something a stranger driving or is wearing or things like offering to park their shopping cart for them in the parking lot on the way into a store. Nowadays in urban environments those small acts of kindness shock people at first with skepticism 🤨 but then always brings a smile 😊.
@trinkabuszczuk61383 ай бұрын
Each situation like like this is an opportunity to practice patience and understanding: take it and you’ll feel better❤
@robinshankland34993 ай бұрын
What a fantastic and concise way to explain anger. Thank You so much for taking the time to make this available.
@channelsusan72524 ай бұрын
And then one day you realize your own boat is empty too.
@ProgressMastery4 ай бұрын
Powerful
@jt.81444 ай бұрын
that's what the video stated "copy and paste"
@Fegga19554 ай бұрын
Yep
@mebeingU24 ай бұрын
Your boat is not only empty, but it’s sinking, too!
@davidsr97194 ай бұрын
@@mebeingU2my boat is not only empty and sinking but it is also on fire….
@TedSawyer-v5o4 ай бұрын
Anger is an emotion that tells you when you feel powerless. Think on THAT and you will truly see anger in a different way.
@TedSawyer-v5o4 ай бұрын
You can't help someone if they don't take responsibility for themselves. If that's what you're dealing with, you need to get help for yourself. If the person is willing to do their work, then I have 2 suggestions, both lift the mind out of the limbic system. First, the simple controled breathing exercise that's going around. Each of the 4 steps is done while internally counting to 4, breath in, hold, breath out, hold. So simple but over time, if done rigorously, it can calm the mind. The other tip, look up. The position of the eyes access different parts of the brain. To get out of emotion, take a walk and look at tree tops or the sky. Be well.
@shishir19694 ай бұрын
Absolutely stunning. The last Tarana was so evocative
@mrlanpp4 ай бұрын
My father is not an empty boat. When his spirit bumps into my meditations it reminds me why the meditation brings communion, which is an expression of journeys met and journey’s arrivals.
@timcolaba4 ай бұрын
Thank you. It is a good reminder of how to handle anger.
@xlsyor2 ай бұрын
I was snorkeling once, just watching and listening to what was going on around me. Years later, it occurred to me in the midst of one of my frequent bouts with anger over some nonsense, probably an encounter on the road, that none of the fish I'd ever observed ever retaliated in anger that I could discern against another one for crossing its path without warning. My mantra, if you will, became "be the fish" whenever some trivial situation got twisted by my monkey brain into an assault on my (imaginary?) persona. Has it worked? In some measure, yes. I understand that my resorting to anger had always been a behavior rooted in some sad childhood misapprehensions, either ignored or misapprehended in turn by adults in my life. Some peace has grown over those mental hangnails with the knowledge I've been touched by some pretty special people who I've grown to feel urge me silently to pass on the benefits of our encounters. All this to say, all is not perfect, but taking the good with the bad, there's some balance, mostly. Feel free to pass it on. Thanks for reading this.
@n40tom2 ай бұрын
Whenever I get angry I think about the little man in the boat and that always brings a smile to my face
@neilsthompson5894 ай бұрын
Blessings to you and to all living beings.
@WildBillILL4 ай бұрын
I am 41 years old and I have no doubt that I needed to hear this more than anything. Thank you.
@ProgressMastery4 ай бұрын
So happy it brought value for you
@WildBillILL4 ай бұрын
@ProgressMastery Accept my mind is a little more complex than that. Maybe a different analogy would help. I don't know. Who's the asshole that led his boat float around in the lake by itself?
@WildBillILL4 ай бұрын
Or maybe it was one of the many inept people that go to work every day and do their job wrong. They made the rope the tides boat to the dock. Who knows
@velomitrovich34254 ай бұрын
I believe it was Seneca who said that we get angry when something takes us by surprise. The monk was not expecting his boat to be hit by another; you don't expect that car to pull out in front of you; you didn't expect that parking ticket. Your anger is just a reaction to something you didn't see coming. My youngest son used to have a real anger issue. I told him this and his anger issue disappeared.
@scottcates2 ай бұрын
Very helpful. Thank you.
@robertyerry81184 ай бұрын
This is great, thank you for sharing and God Bless.
@TrikesterHal4 ай бұрын
A Course In Miracles clarified further with this beautiful story. Thank you. ❤
@S.tebban4 ай бұрын
Everyone else is an empty boat. I'll remember that one.
@flynnzilla87964 ай бұрын
Emotions are neither “good” nor “bad”: they are the intelligence of our being trying to guide us…
@Hurt-to-Healing4 ай бұрын
It means they are good.
@Senjinone4 ай бұрын
Nope. Emotimes is just the residue of our toughts.
@davidwuhrer67044 ай бұрын
@@SenjinoneEmotions come first, thoughts second, if at all.
@Senjinone4 ай бұрын
@@davidwuhrer6704 Nope. 99% of your emotions are created by your toughts.
@davidwuhrer67043 ай бұрын
@@Senjinone You don't know me. Don't assume too much.
@sweeabn67364 ай бұрын
Makes perfect sense. The limit is that people are not empty boats. They are full of their anger or whatever. To the point of this story, my anger is within me and I am responsible for it.
@moabfool4 ай бұрын
There are valid reasons for anger. What isn't valid is letting the anger get in the way of a rational decision or extending grace for a legitimate mistake or a contrite offender. Even worse is letting anger become bitterness or resentment. Holding a grudge is like drinking poison and hoping the other person will die.
@DG-uh8uv4 ай бұрын
Thank you so much for this video. I am a ShadowCoach (the work developed by Carl Jung) and this video beautifully sums up why we are triggered by certain things and react the way that we do. Everything is within us. We tend to project onto others what we are feeling and blame them instead of looking within to resolve inner conflict.
@nothanks58464 ай бұрын
Is there a particular training course or certification process involved in becoming a ShadowCoach? I have never heard of this profession/designation before, but am interested in learning more.
@DG-uh8uv4 ай бұрын
@@nothanks5846 Hi. Yes, there is a particular training/certification course that I’ve taken. Right now I’m in the process of getting my certification and I still need coaching hours. The coaching I do while getting my certification is free of charge. If you would like to contact me, we can talk about it and I can tell you about shadow coaching. You can reply to this comment and I believe it will show up on my KZbin. Let me know if you wanna talk about it and I can send you contact info. I can tell you that it’s very deep self work and it has been life-changing for me.
@DG-uh8uv4 ай бұрын
@@nothanks5846 I thought that I answered you, but I don’t see my comment. I will comment again: Yes, there is a course that I took and I’m in the process of my certification as a shadow coach. I still need a number of hours to complete my certification and during that time the shadow coaching is free of charge. I also want to say that its very deep self work and has been life-changing for me. If you’re interested in talking about it, respond to this reply and I should get a notification on my KZbin account. I can send you contact info and I can tell you about it.
@jonathanweintraub4 ай бұрын
I once dated a boat full of baggage.
@sethtenrec2 ай бұрын
😂👍
@wascawywabbit09874 ай бұрын
The boat is only empty if there is no intent. If there is intent, then the boat is occupied.
@markdomar49444 ай бұрын
You seem to have entirely missed the point.
@wascawywabbit09874 ай бұрын
@@markdomar4944 And so Sir, do you.
@BC-wj8fx4 ай бұрын
True, malevolence is a full-time occupation for some. In those cases anger is useful in setting the precedent that you will not tolerate this further - because asking nicely does not work for these people.
@Chiefonenut4 ай бұрын
@@markdomar4944 Or did he miss ... the boat? Bwahahahahaha
@Adelicows4 ай бұрын
@@wascawywabbit0987no, sorry, you're the only one who missed the point. The point is that anger comes from within yourself, not other people. The boats occupants and their intentions are irrelevant to the story.
@Bears-mhy8882 ай бұрын
Anger I recently learned at 64 is a result of over amped anxiety . I haven't gotten angry since. Help a Veteran, a Senior or a Neighbor today ❤
@joycekepic89472 ай бұрын
My thoughts are that you taught me a very good lesson this morning I live with three grandchildren and every day is a challenge now I will think of the empty boat and it will release my mind
@EastmanD3 ай бұрын
this works for many situations except for the situation where the boat that collides with yours happens to have someone in it and that someone is climbing into your boat with really bad intentions
@7thHead_4 ай бұрын
Emptiness is suddenly attainable with this simple realization. Cool video
@SonicGland4 ай бұрын
Thank you, Jude Law!
@ProgressMastery4 ай бұрын
Haha!
@Deelynn-woohoo4 ай бұрын
Yet anger is a healthy response to being abused, hurt, or disr3spected without cause.
@tjjharris4 ай бұрын
Anger is an early stage we are naturally prone to or later, conditioned too. Hurtful, inconsiderate, disrespectful people are ignorant of a better way to live, with insight and compassion, and your compassionate understanding of them will not give them the reflexive response they internally expect of you so as to feed their self-hate-based self-image. They were denied as children, and are compensating. Work on your own growth and enlightenment, for it is the best you can to for the world.
@Deelynn-woohoo4 ай бұрын
@tjjharris I have already achieved the compassion and understanding to allow me to live a joyful life. There is a time when all must face the fact that true evil exists. Sociopaths and psychopaths will use our compassion to abuse and torture us worse. It seems to truly offend them to see kind and happy people. They see us as the rabbits/victims of society. They cant change and psychopathy is basically untreatable. Their joy is hurting others. Making excuses for them, or denying this will only get you or others into perfect victimhood. Pointless really, unless you are a Masochist.
@RandalO-h1c4 ай бұрын
I understand your reasoning but the Spiritual path transcends conditioned responses of hatred and fear. Is it better to live in peace and die at the hand of a murderer or live a fearful and vengeful life and die of old age?
@Deelynn-woohoo4 ай бұрын
@@RandalO-h1c I'm sorry but I can't make sense of your answer. I'd rather live a peaceful life and make it to 100, or however long the good lord wants me to.
@patriciasalem36064 ай бұрын
@@tjjharris How'd that work for the people who thought if they just took the higher road with Hitler, everything would be rosy?
@kent47864 ай бұрын
An empty shopping cart 🛒 once rolled into my car while I was in it, causing $1500 in damage. I looked over and realized that the shopping cart was empty and so I didn’t get angry
@DeeVeations4 ай бұрын
Lol
@FlatlandMando4 ай бұрын
I had one like that...on a windy day, & a shopping cart blew into my vehicle making a small dent & dislodging paint. The cart was empty but I realized a thoughtless person had not tended it after loading their own groceries. I will never meet that person, but I will be cautious where I put my vehicle on a windy day!
@0dinseye4 ай бұрын
😂😂
@irap214 ай бұрын
I took the cart home.
@csc-photo4 ай бұрын
What were you doing in an empty shopping cart
@charleslanphier80944 ай бұрын
In other words : chill., don't worry about every passing boat. I feel like a new Buddha
@fjb49324 ай бұрын
Love is like anger, triggered by an empty vessel... ☆
@PaynesPrairie4 ай бұрын
So the empty boat story first occurs in the writings of the Taoist Chuang Tzu and has a somewhat different interpretation. But it's a good parable and can be read in different ways, as so many teaching stories can.
@Peace-tk3gr4 ай бұрын
Mmm, yes, except for the part when you're angry at yourself... Anger itself is not the problem, it's how we express it/what we do with it.
@nvsv_wintersport4 ай бұрын
A lot of people don't realize they should angry at themself because of their own actions, but it's easier to channel that anger to 'the other'.
@Da_Xman4 ай бұрын
@@nvsv_wintersport Avoiding personal accountability is like that...
@eoinoneill42414 ай бұрын
I have to agree. A former boss & mentor, who could see that I was overreacting and taking work matters personally, left a lasting impression when they told me “you can’t choose how you feel but you can choose how you respond”
@AlterAbility4 ай бұрын
Our actions result from what seemed most reasonable, so we couldn’t have done differently, but we can in the future because we learn from experiences. Does it make sense to be angry with ourselves? In that sense, our past self is the empty boat.
@little.bear3443 ай бұрын
That's the ultimate nightmare right there: when you reach a point that you can't even live with yourself anymore, when you're no longer content with yourself. Being unable to get along with others is bad enough, but man, when even you can't stand yourself, it's time for professional help.
@connieebinger63434 ай бұрын
Love this. I will remember this. Thank you.
@jerrysharp97224 ай бұрын
Becoming empty felt easy, however it took me 17 months of isolation and only 30 days of community and I am unable to remain empty .Alas in this chapter I am able to choose what I allow to flow through us . lol I am not alone anymore.. I am,,,,,Over flowing with whatever we choose ..Jerry Lee ❤
@MikeSmith-km9ff3 ай бұрын
The Metallica song Waste my hate is about this. James Hetfield got mad that this guy with sunglasses in his car outside a diner kept staring at him. He got more and more pissed off and the guy until the drive showed up and woke the guy up who was asleep with his sunglasses on with his head turned tward the window
@Private-v1l4 ай бұрын
Emotions are primordial. It doesn't matter which emotion we are talking about. When emotions arise unchecked, they consume our thoughts and actions. In other words, they take control of the mind and body. The higher self loses control. All it takes to control emotions is time. Ignore the emotion and the circumstances that created it. Wait for the feeling to dissapate. Then your higher self can clearly see all paths to a righteous solution.
@arizonadreaming41834 ай бұрын
great comment
@Private-v1l4 ай бұрын
@arizonadreaming4183 Thank you. I put this in to practice, and it has worked wonders.
@gomer28133 ай бұрын
Disagree. I’d suggest all readers to examine evidence about emotional regulation. There are many ways to regulate emotion - suppression, distraction, re-appraisal - generally reappraisal along with long-term consistent effort in suppression is the way to change your feelings. Ignoring emotion (distraction) is the least effective. It works in the short term but not long-term. You will just live a life of the emotional rollercoaster - constantly getting upset, and constantly pausing your life to settle down. It’s possible to have better long-term ability to negate those emotions before they bother you at all.
@Private-v1l3 ай бұрын
@gomer2813 While I respect your opinion, I reject this idea because to suppress the emotion is not dealing with the emotion. My technique is simply to not allow the emotion to take control of your higher judgment so that you can see clearly all paths to deal with the situation that created the emotion. By not allowing the emotion to take control in the moment. You can see other options you won't think of if you simply react to the emotion. When we suppress the emotion and cover it up, it festers and poisons the mind, body, and soul.
@gomer28133 ай бұрын
@@Private-v1l recent research on emotional suppression shows that it works. Sometimes has the paradoxical effect, which is what people who are opposed to suppression/repression assume to be the case, but almost always has either a weak or null effect. For the record, emotional acceptance also can have a paradoxical effect. For example, both “accepting” and “seeking” happiness makes people less happy. Most non-modern non-western cultures use suppression and it seems to work well. Eastern cultures use it far more than western cultures and there is little evidence that they are more insane or miserable. The Western hatred of suppression/repression comes from dogmas of the early days of psychology, which is a time when psych gurus did not often back their theories with evidence or experimental results. As for distraction, studies indicate that it has a powerful short term effect but absolutely no long-term effect. Some modern researchers think that suppression works best when paired with re-appraisal, which means rethinking your opinions and reinterpreting the things around you. The idea is to get to the point ideologically where the thing that frustrates you seems like a stupid thing to be frustrated about. Sometimes this also means learning “how to deal with it.” But not always; depends on what kind of thing it is. Then, you simply have to tell yourself “don’t buy into my own bullshit.” There will be a period of years where you still are upset about this thing, even though you know how to deal with it. During that time, you use suppression to deny your emotions (that’s the part of “don’t buy into your own bs”). There is a lot of evidence in surveys and from case studies for the efficacy of re-appraisal, the only problem is that it is hard to “make” people do it in a lab setting.
@satsumamoon4 ай бұрын
Its not the world that causes or invokes our feelings, its our thoughts / beliefs about those things. Thats my take from this. My mother used to say " I dont do anger". She developed a large hump at the top of her back as a way of expressing such feelings, it was more pious I guess, and nobody would blame her or judge her or tell her she was bad. As.a result of being brought up with such ideas, I too learnt to dissosciate from emotions. I was in my forties when I resolved these issues , it was a long introspective journey . The result was not being afraid to feel, but first I had to be unafraid of feeling that fear. I lived all those years not even knowing I was afraid , all.the time...well, most of it. The chronic anxiety manifested physically , it caused a lot of illness. Please dont give such messages to the world about anger being bad, but rather give enlightened understanding about its causes, function and purposes ...and teach people how to deal with it healthily. Pretending youre not angry is very harmful, and thats what happens when people are shamed for it and shunned for it.
@Darci33333 ай бұрын
Dont let the anger within you destroy the person that you can become....
@scottcates2 ай бұрын
Thank you. This is helpful.
@dj31144 ай бұрын
Another story that tends to keep me grounded in Apollo 13. When it happened, the real Jim Lovel is the one that shared the story with Ron Howard who put it in the movie. They were all initially angry when the damage occured and pointing fingers, but Lovel came to grips and told them that they can yell for 10 minutes and at the end of that time, the are still in the same situation but with wasted time and less 02. Spend that time dealing with the problem.
@thomasholland95684 ай бұрын
It took a monk hours of meditation before common sense was found to recognize that anger is something internal to himself. Like happiness, anger is a choice.
@evanhernandez14504 ай бұрын
Oh, I've met plenty of "empty boats" in my life. They are also, the "lights are on but nobody is home" people as well.
@lenering10844 ай бұрын
You can’t control what you feel, but you can control what you do
@preciousone54964 ай бұрын
Sometimes so much easier said than done. ☹️
@annihalited4 ай бұрын
You cannot control the outcome of your actions, you can only control your actions. You are not entitled to the outcome of your actions, you are only entitled to your actions.
@Leto854 ай бұрын
With meditation you can get a better control of what you feel.
@Leto854 ай бұрын
@@wideeyevideo Meditation can help you get more control over your own thoughts and therefore your feelings, mood, and actions based there off. I won't say full control, as I doubt it's possibility but first and foremost I think it's safe for us peopke that a lot of things work in our subconsciousness - which we don't have direct control over. Why do you think that all control is an illusion? I'm curious to read your answer.
@Leto854 ай бұрын
@@wideeyevideo Thank you for replying still. I deem your info rather important and inspirational to me personally, hence I would find it very worthwhile for it to stay undeleted. I to think we don't have free will, which I understand contradicts my previous post about gaining more control through meditation. Now I think of it 'awareness' would be a better word rather than control. Still, I try not to think about it too much as I feel it will holds me back from doing whatever it is that I feel like doing. And yet, our society with its punishment and reward system is based on the idea of individuals having free will and control over their actions, which if the absense of free will would be proven to be true and accepted as such, our society will no longer function as such. Therefore I choose/am programmed to not think about it too much. I've read about thought control to be some sort of paradox because: you can't think what you'll be thinking next. My conclusion so far from that is that because we can't think what to think next our thoughts are not our own. What are your thoughts on this? - yeah, even that very question makes little sense now, does it? XD
@TheDennzio4 ай бұрын
very timely...I needed this
@jolovesnailart4 ай бұрын
Beautiful story, one to remember ☺️ Thank you so much for sharing this 🙏
@airfiero47724 ай бұрын
Great and powerful thoughts
@Anabsurdsuggestion3 ай бұрын
Read Seneca on anger. Same observation.
@ProgressMastery3 ай бұрын
Will check it out!
@madhumaniar18014 ай бұрын
Beautiful story, thank you for sharing
@hobowithawaterpistol90704 ай бұрын
I think every emotion including anger should be experienced, but after a few moments or minutes, it’s best to let it go. Happiness is great to have as long as can, but the side effect of happiness can be sadness because you can’t hold onto it! So trying to live life with just simple existence for me is the greatest life I can live and then when those emotions surface, it’s easier to go back to contentment without loss or gain!
@KeithHays-ek4vr4 ай бұрын
📣 Come in number 7. - Your time is up............
@crackerbarrel69654 ай бұрын
🤣
@chrismilbank4 ай бұрын
Very true.
@LuckyJim50504 ай бұрын
It’s not size of the boat, it’s the emotion of the ocean
@ProgressMastery3 ай бұрын
Interesting!
@AindréasMacHoireabáird4 ай бұрын
Thank you
@Akashb715 ай бұрын
To the point! Thank you
@ProgressMastery5 ай бұрын
Thank you for your comment
@ls-kk4pq4 ай бұрын
Major food for thought! Thanks!
@My-Nickel4 ай бұрын
Thank you sir 🙏
@kayfeezell14334 ай бұрын
What an insightful story .Awesome really .Thank you .
@travelwell80984 ай бұрын
"All ire lies within."
@briseboyАй бұрын
All ire is land. All rocks are sham. All licks are gay.
@Jay-qq7so4 ай бұрын
But there’s no getting away from the stupidity of others 😢
@RisingTidesAC4 ай бұрын
Anger is necessary to our survival.
@marshalmcdonald74764 ай бұрын
anger has the same root as angel....
@TheDennzio4 ай бұрын
not really
@TheDennzio4 ай бұрын
@@marshalmcdonald7476 and....
@RisingTidesAC4 ай бұрын
@@TheDennzio Definitely.
@marshalmcdonald74764 ай бұрын
@@TheDennzio just thinking they're related, like magnetism and electricity....mostly just riffing..
@DeborahPinder-f5t4 ай бұрын
Thank you, thought provoking
@23ograin534 ай бұрын
Same applies to "being offended". No one can offend you (or me) with speech, we make the choice to make ourselves "the offended".
@Sicilia9284 ай бұрын
Words only have the power to hurt you if you give them that power. They're just words, sound expelled with air. I figured out a long time ago that hate does far more damage to the hater than it does to the target of that hate, especially if the target considers the source and puts no value on the hater's words or beliefs.
@BC-wj8fx4 ай бұрын
@@Sicilia928 Malevolence absolutely has the ability to harm you even if you don't believe the words at face value. It's called psychological warfare. I dislike the target-blaming implication that it's one's fault if they lose anything under the duress of psychological warfare. Dehumanisation works. Some personality disorders are considered to be complex PTSD from years of dehumanisation and invalidation of their personhood.
@Sicilia9284 ай бұрын
@@BC-wj8fx There are always exceptions, especially when you up the ante by describing situations of constant repeated verbal attacks, especially beginning and lasting through childhood. I'm talking about an insult and you're talking about programming. In no way did I blame any 'victim' and I stand by my comment. Words have the value you give them and harboring and spewing hate is very self-destructive irrelevant of whether it affects the target or not.
@gomer28133 ай бұрын
That is massively wrong.
@LOwens-xf8yo4 ай бұрын
When people harm you, that’s their karma; how you respond, is on yours
@Da_Xman4 ай бұрын
WHAT AN ✨EXTRAORDINARY✨ VIDEO...! Thanks loads for posting such a wonderful reminder! ✨♥️👋🥴👍✨
@MRoachthe14 ай бұрын
The most dangerous tools creat the most impactful results. Anger is a tool.
@Jgjules4 ай бұрын
Thank you 🙏🏻
@YouilAushana4 ай бұрын
I remember my first Buddhist book
@kt63324 ай бұрын
Good one, thanks!
@reneangler3 ай бұрын
Thanks
@Thekeninger4 ай бұрын
I think that comparing other people to empty boats could lead to misunderstandings and misconceptions.
@raynic11734 ай бұрын
I here what you're saying, but, the boat is not they're ignorant or some other judgement. It's that it's often unintentional, and how you judge is from you, all you.
@BillJones4 ай бұрын
U wot m8?
@boonraypipatchol72955 ай бұрын
... 4 Noble Truth... .... Buddhism......
@misscatearcher4 ай бұрын
There is a reason why we respond with those feelings, and these reactions are survival tools. So do not ignore your reactions they are healthy responses to real life situations. If you supress your emotions they will someday surface with a boom.Understand your responses and try to solve the reasons that trigger them, not in a wishing well way, but in a realistic way.Improve your conditions, accept what you cant change and support yourself with boosting little bonuses, this can be anything that makes you feel good about your life. Pretending everyone else is an empty vessel and that you can control anything is not a healthy way to deal with real life situations.
@no_regerts51764 ай бұрын
I find anger quite useful!
@WayneRetchford4 ай бұрын
Thank you how true 😊❤
@FueledSelf-Discovery18 күн бұрын
May the Lord watch over everyone.
@Original504 ай бұрын
Anger is the energy we release when our boundries are challenged. It's there to educate the assholes who fail to tie-off their empty boat too 😊