8 Signs Non-Monogamy is for You | Sex and Relationship Coach | Caitlin V

Open relationships, polyamory, and more... Could non-monogamy be right for you? I'm Caitlin V, and as a sex and relationship coach, I get this question all the time. In this video, I break down what non-monogamy is, go over 8 surprising signs that it might be for you, and break down the do's and dont's of a non-monogamous relationship. 🏋🏼‍♂️Apply for 1:1 coaching🏋🏼‍♂️
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00:00 Start (Caitlin's dance break 💃)
00:24 How do you know if Non-Monogamy is really for you?
01:21 8 Signs Non-Monogamy is for you!
01:31 WTF even is Non-Monogamy?!
05:22 The Different Types of Attachment Styles
10:57 3 Red Flags of Non-Monogamy ⛳️
12:50 I want to help YOU in this journey!
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#CaitlinV

[@CaitlinV]

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[@MonogamishPodcast]

Ethical non-monogamy is the best. It changed our life! Not just the sexual freedom, but the community is the best. Awesome video.

[@jeffreywalters1031]

Another extremely thought provoking video full of advice and explained in a way everyone can understand. Your are awesome!

[@ihategooglealot3741]

Really like the way you explain and explore this potentially wonderful minefield, and the humour you do it with.

[@JamesFarrand]

What a great freagin video. Smart, helpful, non-judgmental info/content presented in a fun and easy to consume fashion. Officially a fan. Forwarding this to women I’ve met and tried to communicate all this stuff, but stumbled too much. Cheers all!

[@spiritzweispirit1st638]

Thank You Caitlin! Such Nurturing Wisdom'ness! Always Stay Amazing In Your Awesomeness!🌈🍀🌌

[@chrisspezowka8417]

Great vid thanks Caitlin V

[@Wolf-cc9qv]

Just found your channel this was and is a great confirmation and another of great info. Thank you

[@purposeandtalent2010]

I tell you I just enjoy your energy sooo much. This is better than HBO

[@purposeandtalent2010]

I imagine the biggest challenge is you being board easily... Are you an aquarius??

[@dawnhoward5537]

Excellent video! Thank you.

[@TsiSiFa]

Love seeing this content! I hope we can see more "outside the box" stuff- maybe some gender talk for nonbinary folx like me!

[@maidenlord6663]

I always start a relationship with trust until I'm given a reason to not trust

[@munkeefinkelbeen5395]

I'm actually somewhere between wanting something monogamous, and something non-monogamous. Monogamous because it's always been something I've wanted...the standard wife and kids spiel, but I'm also finding myself attracted to a lot of women. I dunno...at any rate I have no plans to rush into anything. Great video! :)

[@royrieder2113]

Great video. You relay information in a very supportive, sex-positive, easy to understand way. It's the sex ed many people never got, but definitely need

[@jeffreywalters1031]

I have not found too much advice on your channel about older men and younger women.

[@sacred_alchemy]

You’re amazing!!! ❤

[@sacred_alchemy]

I have learned so much and I just started. I want to know everything about sex, relationships, intimacy. I had several kundalini experiences. Consciousness expansion.Ascension. Now I’m consciously creating as I started dating. This topic is so important. Thank you for everything.

[@williamkendig6509]

Very informative. I thought the red flags section was very important 👍. Also the you might just have to end your current relationship to be honest, brutal but honest.

[@thesecondtonone9204]

Wonderful topic

[@downtoearthconstruction7768]

Tbh my friends find it strange that as a male I enjoy seeing my wife intimate exploring. It's all about good fun, feelings, different sensations, everyone has different smells, ect. We've been married 12 yrs it took along time to get misses to except it but has been alot of fun for both of us. Emotions are involved in many ways but I have to consent on them. Communication simple but complicated. We've done mmf ffm but we both enjoy mmf more even as a straight man. At the end of the day were all human we have desires, feelings, and with communication and a mature attitude the things that can be explored are euphoric. Jealously has happened with us on both ends which came up unexpectedly but their are ways to talk and reassess boundaries. Communication simple but the most important and difficult thing to do sometimes. Something's are hard to discuss with a partner, but if you can't do so and have an understanding for each other it'll never work. Me and my wife love your channel and has really helped her understand some of the pros and cons to this lifestyle and if it was right for us.

[@keithpierce1888]

You are not weard and not alone

[@matthewandrews3883]

I'd really like to know more about how you talked with your wife about this and ended up convincing her.

[@rohans7194]

Couples who get into such relationships have good level of understanding between each other.

[@scottschumacher5844]

Liked her term “multiple entanglements.” Right up there with “searching for Pablo.” I still use that one when I’m down there between the thighs.

[@mr.horrorchild4094]

You're super cool

[@TheBigGuppy]

Can’t keep the woman I have happy why in the Hell would I want another one. 😀😀😀

[@TheHybridlogic]

This is the comment I was looking for

[@KenSchafer63]

I've said it before, but guys, if you're in a relationship with a woman and she is sleeping with other men, you need to legally protect yourself. You need an iron-clad legal document requiring a paternity test if she gets pregnant and also stating that you cannot be required to support or care for children who are not yours.

[@kbanghart]

My wife biologically can't have kids, so we're good there. Maybe someday I'll experience the joy of watching her being pleasured by another guy.

[@KenSchafer63]

@@kbanghart LOL, Yeah "the joy". You get to do all the work, so some other guy can have all the fun. I would never put up with that.

[@ChristopherNealBUSHIDO49ERS]

I just came here to say I don't need eight signs. LOL Love ya', Caitlin!

[@augusthavince8909]

I don't tend to be the jealous sort, and I am definitely averse to being around jealous energy. I think I'm in the later stages of inner exploration of non-monogamy, and I think it's safe to say that I am non-monogamous. The thing is, I've said this out loud or in text before, and it is a sure way to get socially assassinated by the conservative culture I live in (and some places that are liberal, but still get furious about non-monogamy). I get why people will think I'm full of shit, since I'm a cis-man. They think I'm incapable of love if I'm attracted to more than one person. I am who I am. Because of being socially assassinated for the past decade, I'm woefully neglected in intimate relations (on top of not being especially good at socializing anyway). I'm demisexual (I'm simple, I need to get to know someone and know that I can trust them for a bond to start to form. Am I avoidant?). I'm sapiosexual (when a person is knowledgeable and wise without trying hard to make sure everyone recognizes it, it's just good energy. That and intellectual curiosity). I'm attracted to people that are not putting on airs (I think this may be why I have a tendency to be attracted to women that are in relationships. They are more relaxed, not on the hunt or trying to be hunted and just being their core selves. Flirting is fine if it's not fussy, but just comes naturally). I'm complicated. I'm not one of those guys that can just go out and find a woman that night or weekend and bed them. Or, at least I've never come across anyone that has turned me on like that. I guess I like energy to flow naturally, and see if that chemistry is good before getting to know someone physically. Maybe I'm just a slow processor. Oh! Communication is ABSOLUTELY necessary! I'm tired of being forced to mind read, especially when you are pretty certain you're right about something and they will say "I never said that." Mind reading is not enough. Being absent for too long is not enough. These things cause me to get distant and any bond to start fading. So, these are things I know fully about myself now. Why did I say that all here? You know.

[@davidswanson6219]

One day can you do a video of you about ur open marriage and tell us about it how is it working out for you and your husband just asking think All of us look like hear about it

[@droningharry]

After 38 years in the same bed (well, multiple new beds) I'd be shot but I love my sweet wife and She's totally worth it.

[@kbanghart]

Same!

[@atruepimp1]

I can definitely do it, never met a woman that didn't eventually want to lock me down though....

[@mr.horrorchild4094]

No way, you're the wanderer

[@jwallace4398]

Part time lover, totally dedicated half the time, selfish the other half.. maybe this would help fill her gap(pun intended). If just for her side, or both.. now just to untangle the mixed thoughts of being happy/exited about it, yet vulnerable to feeling less then the others. Uhh.. you make us question ourselves, both thank u and dam u Caitlin. Haha

[@alexmason3472]

Well after this Video I'm sure that Non-Monogamy is not really for me, with some exeptions. And I'm even more certain that my GF, who is more interested in that than me and the reason I'm watching this specific video, is unfortunatley further away from doing practicing this than even me. 🤷‍♂️ Thank you very much for this video it is very interesting and helped me alot 😁

[@stephentuthill4598]

I guess some of us have always known... The thing is to be honest at the start of a relationship.

[@kbanghart]

And, throughout. People change, after all.

[@redblueiris]

I knew this when I was a fetus

[@mr.horrorchild4094]

No, you couldn't, you were just a clump of cells

[@williamcook5634]

Catlin, you are beautiful and very much loved.

[@robertlong7841]

Really interesting. Not ONE negative comment about "open relationships". Not even ONE. Weird....

[@allistair61]

must ask, how did you know about the big bird costume?

[@47ooB]

I am looking into pursuing this lifestyle , I am in a very successful relationship ,where we have had 3somes, I think bringing in another partner (with the correct morals and lifestyle) would only add to the greatness of my partner and i 's friendship ☯️ I am willing to accept difficult situations and feelings ☮💜♾ My intentions are pure ✅💎

[@MrZZooh]

Not too shabby.

[@lindahendricks4507]

Morals? When I think of morals I think of Christian morals there is nothing Christian here. Just lust

[@MrZZooh]

@@lindahendricks4507 i agree. I could care less about the religious aspect of it but it's basically naked lust and concupiscence disguised in a fancy term. It's basically a liberal version of polygamy.

[@47ooB]

Get your head out the gutter. if you cant shut down your sacral chakra when conceptualizing something like this then it is not for you. It's not all about sex ☯️

[@MrZZooh]

@@47ooB Sounds like somebody figured out how to shut down their sacral chakra and have foursomes at the same time. Must be nice!

[@servmlrcc]

Liked this video just because of Caitlin admitting that she's non monogamous ❤

[@jameswhalen4903]

You may want to make a video of how couples children deal with this Much of this seems to be for people with more free time and family that doesn't ask questions etc. Most busy working couples with 1 lover struggle to give one another enough time, so it seems this web could be exhausting trying to juggle more. Tossing ideas out.

[@kbanghart]

My kids wouldn't care.

[@Scott924m]

being Demi sexual it's not for me . i'm not sex repulsed but I need a deep personal connection for a relationship . My lady is my goddess and the air I breath . because of these video and Ms Caitlin I have learned alot .

[@littlesfabshop]

6

[@greenlean8890]

I love this! I'm glad you cherish and honor your lady, I'm sure that just adds to the special deep connection you two share. I completely agree with your stance, it's also not for me. I could never be okay with my partner spending the night with someone else then coming home to me the next morning. And the next time we have sex all I'd think about was my partner having sex all night with another person. Monogamy is definitely for me!

[@walnesblanc]

Hello caitlin and have you thought about live streaming on twitch and starting your own podcasts and starting your own tiktok account and starting your own patreon account or onlyfans account in the future in the future

[@DigigodGamer]

only been with one person my entire life would love to just try out the idea of having multiple partners

[@kbanghart]

Me too. My wife and I have been discussing it. Hot as hell.

[@mr.horrorchild4094]

Yeah, it will be fine. Do it

[@spiritzweispirit1st638]

My Term Is 'Multi Connective' Always Spirit to Spirit Nurture As First Value, Via Pre Communicated Safe Adult to Adult, Healthy Compartmentalized,Time and Space Shared, Bio Physical Expression! Life's Linearity of Moments Progressively Accelerate! - Kind Spirits Are Amazingly Beautiful' Live Now!🌈🌎🌍🌏🌌

[@lindahendricks4507]

Has anyone else noticed that the majority of people that approve are male?

[@ModernArcher262]

Ever noticed how most divorces are initiated by females? 😂

[@christophermartin367]

Chris

[@angelkittyart5997]

I love you

[@shozanhanma2709]

I only do open situations; open relationships, and non-monogamous entanglements. Any woman who wants me to be her personal slave AKA monogamy has to go elsewhere

[@morthenpedersen3289]

👍👍

[@ast-og-losta]

I prefer a multilateral monogamy.

[@MrZZooh]

So how is this any different than polygamy? The only difference is that it's legally non-binding and it's open to both the male and female but at the core it's the same.

[@AndyGeesGarage]

It is not the same, nonmanogamy is different than polyamory

[@nelzen9529]

I enjoyed the video despite the singing! ;);) /jk

[@nelzen9529]

You talk really well and keep viewer attention.

[@tbateman9902]

Is sharing your gorgeous wife non monagomy?

[@Karrikua]

Or maybe you're watching this video and already know you're non-monogamous

[@octobre4623]

Monogamy is not for my wife. That has made my life quite painful.

[@Swearengen1980]

Yeah I call BS on a lot of this lifestyle. The degradation of our society and all this weird shit going on in our country and suddenly so many people are "ethically non-monogamous". The thing is, from what I've seen, it's WAY more women than are doing it. Half the damn dating profiles I see are married women whose husband is ok just hearing the stories or knowing nothing at all about it (other than she doe sit). I call it like I see it: These people want to be a whore. This trying to make it spiritual and all this other nonsense is justifying their need to sleep with a bunch of people. And that's where I think she's wrong - It is mostly about sex, not communication. Simply put, if your spouse wants to fuck other people, she doesn't love you like she says she does. You're a convenience and comfort factor, but not much more. I'd end any relationship in a heartbeat because she's telling you, you're not enough for her. Obviously this works for men too, but it seems to be far more prevalent with women. It's blatantly an open assault on true ethical values as we've watched this country to descend into chaos the last 5 years. The same people who don't believe in monogamy also tend to think boys wearing skirts should use our daughter's locker room. It's not just one thing, it's part of a larger picture.

[@octobre4623]

@@Swearengen1980 I am European married to an Arabic woman. We married because we both have the same job and we both wanted children. We made a business, we made children. Fine. Now she is an intelligent pragmatic business woman. She wants something or somebody, she gets it. No theory, no feelings. She says that marriage is only to make a family with children. Otherwise do not marry. She says also that every woman after fourty feels the life boring and will make all efforts to get a lover. Feelings simply do not exist or are an error. As an European it was a hard time to swallow the pill. We love our children and our social position. "What does not kill you makes you stronger" (Nietzsche). That is what happens to me. I am growing much stronger. You see, it is not exactly like what happens in America. But at the end, be strong and know what you want. Women's theories are only made by women for women. I don't say go your own way, but only be strong.

[@Swearengen1980]

@@octobre4623 Sorry man, you're just being played for a fool. She's a narcissist, plain and simple. She has the nerve to speak on behalf of ALL women over 40 to justify her wanting to bang whoever she wants. Everything you just said on her behalf is 100% a narcissistic viewpoint using lies to justify her behavior and you accept being a doormat. Those weren't even "women's theories", that's HER theory. I'm curious what part of Europe you're from, because My German, English, or Italian immigrant friends would never put up with that nonsense.

[@octobre4623]

@@Swearengen1980 From France. Hypernarcissist she is, you are right. I am much older than her, but with some spare money and I was slowly loosing my job when we started together. Her youth and her ability for business proved to be precious at the beginning. Later my only reason to live and to accept this non-acceptable situation was our three children. Now that they are at university my mission approaches to its end. I no longer work, only rest, travel, do gymnastics and see if I can get a girlfriend or something like that. Meanwhile she goes on working and making money. That is my life. Maybe a stupid one. I hope to live at least 20 more years - maybe 30 - and make the most of this time.

[@Swearengen1980]

@@octobre4623 Sorry to hear that. Although I disagree with the notion that children should be subjected to a dysfunctional marriage and pretend it's for their sake. I don't believe it's healthy at all. Divorce is better than growing up in a F'd up household. And even if they didn't know particulars, no doubt kids pick up on subtle tensions. Their instincts are strong, even fi they don't say anything to you. You must be one of the most patience men.

[@gamaethiarachchilayagunara4904]

Monogamy should be prohibited, because it is boring and drives the man kind to the grave sooner not letting female to have enough sexual exercise to keep her deteriorating female organ in good condition.

[@mr.horrorchild4094]

Sounds like swinging

[@scotthopper1965]

Why be in any relationship if you want to be non-monogamous?

[@piecesoftheheart9231]

For the same reason they want to be in one relationship, just multiplied… love, connection, affection, etc… For some, less is more… for others, more is more… My husband and I (17 yrs married) have experimented with non monogamy/polyamory temporarily, just cuz we’re adventurous like that….. we had fun and always enjoy our adventures together, but we find that we love and prefer monogamy.

[@mr.horrorchild4094]

It's a way for you to have sex with various people with the benefit of someone waiting at home when those you hook up with turn out to be losers

[@ryanmacphee427]

Are you married lady

[@ahmedsalek976]

No.

[@47ooB]

☯️🧿

[@ahmedsalek976]

@@47ooB ?

[@47ooB]

Perceptions vary ☮💜♾ all love 📈

[@ahmedsalek976]

@@47ooB go away.

[@jdenns7691]

Why does it have to be "ethical " ? I don't want the ethical part of it...I just wanna do what I wanna do with who I wanna do it with, when I wanna a do it.

[@piecesoftheheart9231]

I think the “ethical” element mostly just refers to not lying/hiding… If you want a relationship you can lie in, without hard feelings, you might have a hard time finding a match… not impossible, but really unlikely.

[@blackstar12310]

I’m just wondering what’s her body count is 😂😭🤦🏽‍♂️

[@AmericanWithTheTruth]

As someone who has been involved with non-monogamous relationships on a couple occasions in my life, I can tell you that this area is very dangerous. I’ve also been married twice and my first marriage was 25 years which ended because of the problems with a non-monogamous relationship, this is not something to be taken lightly and can have drastic consequences if the moon and sun do not line up 100% in the sky. For one… This video discusses nothing about the differences between men and women in physiology, and in biochemistry. There’s everything from estrogen, testosterone and hormones that are 100% different, and men and women treat relationships differently as well.for instance, women are more emotional because of estrogen and also not to mention the oxytocin release during orgasm is completely different than vasopressin release through orgasm from men. The more partners women have during their lifetime the least likely they are to pair bond in a monogamous relationship. This is also why the red pill movement rejects women that have been run through by multiple men because the more men they sleep with the less likely they are to be able to be Monogamous inside of a relationship long-term. This has the ability effects on long-term health especially when you have a family with kids. The inability for a woman to pair on, also has a magnitude of physiological and psychological problems that can manifest throughout years and even decades down the road. None of this stuff is discussed by Kaitlyn in this video, which is a very dangerous and under emphasize topic. if you’re going to get in a monogamous relationship or marriage, you better damn well have a PhD and be in the most stable relationship possible on the planet because it is literally that difficult to maintain and you have to constantly work very hard in order to make it work. So the real question is, is it really worth the amount of stress and difficulty in the end, because you can’t tie down to one person and dedicate your life 100% to one person?

[@gordonbecker1456]

Emotionally healthy people would be in a purely monogamous relationship

[@gordonbecker1456]

If you have a secure attachment style you would NEVER be ok with this

[@gordonbecker1456]

There is not so many relationship styles. There are people that manipulate, use and abuse people. Like you

[@gordonbecker1456]

Gaslighting

[@gordonbecker1456]

This video is pure gaslighting