Can Reddit write a smooth pickup line one word at a time

I've disobeyed every "Don't try this at home" disclaimer I've ever seen and yet even I, in this instance, feel the need to say: please don't try to use any of the lines you see in this video 💀

[@Lord__Voldemort]

Please don’t suck my nose

[@rekhavmenon1507]

I

[@olaoaoaoaoaoaoaaoaoaooaooa7484]

why not

[@chickendinnerthewinner]

*sucks*

[@meekotheotter2801]

u gonna stop me sweetcheeks?

[@plasmasack]

Stop having such a succulent nose then

[@shapooopiefour7173]

One Redditor may not be able to get a girlfriend, but with the power of teamwork, *many* Redditors may not be able to get a girlfriend.

[@doughboywhine]

Like crabs in a bucket

[@kyokazuto]

Can they get a boyfriend tho

[@Davian2073]

​@@kyokazutoThat sounds... Kinda gay ngl

[@klsad]

​​@@Davian2073science says that it is 100% straight to fuck guys

[@dampseeker]

ape together still not strong

[@defective6811]

I used the 'a penis is just a cabbage' line on my wife while she as playing nintendo and now she's playing nintendo AND listening to an audiobook so she, quote, 'wont have to deal with (my) bullshit.' Thanks reddit!

[@EternalShadow1667]

Reddit: helping couples raise their productivity by 200%

[@BeastBeatsYoMom]

Just wait until she starts eating cabbage, then say it again

[@dizzy_jump]

you got it wrong

[@Orangekid65]

​@@dizzy_jumpyeah, it should be "cabbage is just penis in disguise."

[@TheRealBatabii]

Your wife plays nintendo? Damn, you got lucky

[@Armadeus]

"are you my mom because you look like my father's wife" gets me giggling every time

[@navnibrijesh7258]

Fr it sounds like a lost child finding his mum 😭

[@nyankitttyy]

3:25 is timestamp if you guys need it

[@FilipinoNoob69420]

​@@nyankitttyy w

[@nyankitttyy]

@@FilipinoNoob69420 thank you and yw

[@yesy8s52]

I read it as "are you my mom because you look like my wife's father"

[@straybricks]

“Comment removed by moderator” is such an underrated inclusion.

[@Hi-dx1xk]

What in the world could that one word have been?? 😂

[@LarryTheTugaGamer1511]

​@@Hi-dx1xkSome things are best to remain unknown..

[@lolliii5477]

no beings shall know what horrors lie beneath such statement...

[@darthvaderbutwayshittier7054]

It makes the joke funnier.

[@T-Gwen-T]

There’s only one word that’s more horrific than a swear word. That if I even said it here I would get banned.

[@ThatOneSeal]

"I’m horny, so watch out" is the one sentence for the whole internet

[@mistercrimson63]

“You can’t sum up the internet in one sentence.” Me, an intellectual:

[@slametdinatadinata645]

Internet can be cool

[@kianbeheshti5471]

i sure am💀

[@tubaraofluente]

"NEVER make decisions when you're horny" someone smarter than me, probably

[@LucreciaCrescentIsBestGirl]

Zeus be like

[@homosexual7]

Only redditors can come up with a pick up line as beautiful as “Lets burn calories by skipping quickly, through pillows”

[@IcedCoffeBestCoffee]

Let’s intercourse for many seconds

[@TT35109]

What’s funny about these pick up lines is that the humour of the line itself is what makes it a great pick up line. Better to bag someone with a sense of humour anyway. XD

[@maazfarhantheepicgamer311]

the funniest is hey there Asshole!

[@pixelzebra8440]

Why did I get chills reading that one

[@gunslingergirl2579]

@@TT35109 As a short, overweight, bearded, Japanese card game-playing guy once told my brother, "As long as they're laughing, their eyes are closed. And if their eyes are closed, they're not looking at all of this." I think he's pretty good-looking in the face, though; the fat was nice to his chin.

[@___________________________-.-]

The guy who placed a comma after "kids" is a true hero

[@lolliii5477]

KIDS, comma, NOW

[@chaoschaoschaoss]

that couldve, ahem, gone uh very wrong

[@BlakeH..888_]

Wait, what?

[@chaoschaoschaoss]

@@BlakeH..888_ the sentence couldve turned into, uh, any number of sexual prompts involving children-

[@Biggest_Idiot_Around]

"Everybody wants romance but nobody wants my gonads" is so criminally underrated

[@dreamingscarlettm5415]

Sounds like song lyrics actually

[@martyruth77]

god i wish - an ace

[@GumSkyloard]

@@martyruth77 thanks for playing along with the joke

[@kianbeheshti5471]

dont worry someone will like them eventually...... hopefully

[@kathryn74]

fr 😭

[@0ri0nssuspenders]

Just picturing a person yelling "SOMEBODY STOP THE LONELINESS" At a shocked looking person with a drink in their hand over booming club music is sending me 😂

[@isitsweet9567]

It's like something out of a novel.

[@robinrehlinghaus1944]

That sounds like it has happened already 21 times in 21 clubs and 21 pubs in 21 countries for 21 men

[@N95j]

@@robinrehlinghaus1944hmmmm, technically wouldn’t that be a bit more than 21 times? just curious

[@badwulff]

@@N95j 21 times per club y'see

[@isitsweet9567]

@@badwulff Wouldn't you have to adjust the number of instances per country for population and popularity of club culture in that country?

[@fish-champ]

Matt Rose is like an internet archeologist, he’s constantly finding posts from a time long ago

[@Capybara_Productions]

@SidTheSquid999you

[@alicebthegachaweirdo8378]

@@Capybara_Productionsa

[@SauceTheSecond]

Pineapple?

[@25VolarSleet]

@@SauceTheSecond cuz

[@IndigoMoons]

@@25VolarSleet bromelain

[@shennyboi110]

4:02 -“Did god have sex with an ostrich?-“ That’s got to be the MOST random setup line i’ve ever heard but the punchline actually works 😂

[@Brass319]

does it?

[@thatonecabridog]

_does it?_

[@robinchesterfield42]

Which god are we talking about? If it's Zeus, he DID actually bang a chick as a swan and have twins that were born from a frickin' egg... Mythology is fun. :P

[@palmossi]

500th like!

[@Mag3.1415]

*_does it?_*

[@starlightbard]

"Bonjour, je brûlée amoureux" is probably the most threatening thing here, omg lol "Good morning, I burned in love"

[@Zarmdthecoolest]

Sounds like they set their SO on fire

[@doo_lissdu_lighost6133]

I fell into a burning ring of fire

[@vincenttrigg4521]

Sounds romantic to me, sounds like they are burning due to being in love with them

[@ElectricalStorm]

@@doo_lissdu_lighost6133 and it burned burned burned, the flames went higher

[@rsnnramlall9642]

i love that part where reddit decides to sing sweet caroline cause it actually may work as a pickup line

[@icecranberry2148]

Well, her name has to be actually Caroline but yeah.

[@LordAJ12345]

@@icecranberry2148 Or you have to be a really good singer

[@DitzyNizzy2009]

@@icecranberry2148- "Who's Caroline? My name's Rachel."

[@Alfonso162008]

@@DitzyNizzy2009 "Whoops, sorry!" *starts singing "Rosanna" by Toto*

[@smileyface81mc77]

I loved that part, it was genuinely really charming. Like, it was absolutely a “task failed successfully” thing, but I loved it lol. Like, everyone in that thread was like “bollocks to this, let’s sing some Neil Diamond!”

[@mikethegoo]

"Tonight, you will wank" sounds more like an answer to the pickup line than a pickup line itself

[@Gary-Eng]

it sounds like the beginning of a movie trailer

[@The_Professional_Moron]

“The doctor said you’d never wank again… It’s a miracle!”

[@AngelBirdo]

@@Gary-Eng A horror movie trailer, the quote very much feels like a threat

[@erihtea0719]

It sounds like a command

[@saccorhytus]

@@AngelBirdoget ready for the wank of your life

[@imthepigeonguy]

I love how they can't form a coherent sentence but as soon as someone starts singing Sweet Caroline everyone's all in

[@wumfumblus]

"How hard is calculus? Not as hard as my.. prostate" is possibly the best pickup line ever

[@Slimeball21_3]

Last guy saved it from being worse lol

[@macaronandcheese18113]

@@Slimeball21_3 not as hard as my... heart :(

[@amerain1729]

Bro has prostate cancer 😭

[@that_one_paperclip8373]

this is probably one of the few videos that I haven't heard Matt say "skullemoji" and I am genuinely surprised.

[@LobsterMobsterTheCrispiestLoaf]

Huh, true. I didn't think about that...

[@user-ez8gv]

Well he has the one piece skull on his shirt💀☠️🏴‍☠️

[@avivyoukerharel2140]

Emojis are kinda a taboo on reddit

[@73frogs]

he did use the skull emoji in the description!

[@anomalousanimates]

SKULLL EMMOJIIII

[@arvt_]

this is the equivalent of re-translating a phrase into rarely used language hundreds of times

[@aionicthunder]

Eh, not enough instances of "I came". Or insisting they are "grounded and high"

[@isitsweet9567]

@@aionicthunder I see you are a man of culture. But the truth is, I'm gonna end my father. Him. All.

[@AXAXAXAYt]

​@@aionicthunderwhen you ask gays what they did at the party

[@Ellisepha]

Especially the "Let's intercourse for many seconds" one.

[@EpicLaserMage7198]

@@aionicthunder a possible Book of Mario fan?

[@Lassoloc]

"Cabbage is just penis in disguise" gives a new meaning to Matt rubbing the cabbage in his lap in the intro

[@luthorr000]

I JUST REALIZED

[@human01.1]

"they have already breached our defences"

[@hughcaldwell1034]

Best part is that lettuce used to be a potent sex symbol... okay, lettuce isn't cabbage, but come on...

[@zeldagamelover24]

Need more of these "one word at a time" videos, cause this is hilariously amazing

[@BozKol]

"You look like a fookin horse" immediately followed by "Let's intercourse for many seconds" had me WHEEZING.

[@dumaass]

I have never heard of a better pickup line than "Let us intercourse for many seconds".

[@Unidentified952]

FR LMAO

[@alansmithee419]

verbing nouns will never not be funny.

[@bjorncorvin4568]

Henry 8th be like:

[@De19thKingJulion]

Sarah Jessica Parker

[@8squared007]

“Lemme get us a table at Mcdick’s” is CRIMINALLY underappreciated

[@Jupiter-T]

Yeah I'm not into men, but for people who are, surely that would work, no??

[@8squared007]

@@Jupiter-T Nah, it works for straight guys too. “Hey girl, lemme get us a table at McDick’s. What’re you orderin’?”

[@Jupiter-T]

@@8squared007 Straight men like to be called girls? XD

[@Secretly-Selina]

4:48 missed opportunity for them to spell “Tonight, WE STEAL THE MOON”

[@somerandomgamer8504]

Tonight, on Top Gear-

[@ElClubGatunoCR]

"Let me get us a table at McDicks" had me wheezing of laughter lmao. It sounds like something you COULD say, but you just royally screw up

[@Demoli1584]

are

[@pinkcowqueen]

@@Demoli1584 you

[@dragooon784]

@@pinkcowqueensure

[@pinkcowqueen]

@@dragooon784 that

[@chickendoodle32]

@@pinkcowqueen you

[@fivepainbbles]

“Methamphetamine sure tastes sweeter on tits” is actually a great pickup line

[@cursedbeans5560]

No

[@Coercioner]

@@cursedbeans5560yes.

[@HotdogWaterVibes]

Im gonna use it on my friend and see how they react lmao

[@Smoldragoncat]

I never expected to hear this from someone with a Ralsei pfp

[@sholamakinde430]

what happened to ralsei how did he get on this horrific part of the internet why did you stoop down to reddit

[@SavouryGalette]

"No one DARES to suckle my t e e t before bathtime" made me laugh so unnecessarily hard.

[@jesper8836]

I’m absolutely begging you do this again, I’ve already watched this 3 times and died cackling every time Edit: watched it for the fourth time and laughed so hard I was clutching my stomach and straining to fucking breathe. If I die, it’s gonna be because of this video. I was trying so hard not to just start screaming laughing, my whole family is asleep!

[@kh6853]

How do not wake everyone up? Seriously

[@JackFennec98]

I was out with a couple of friends not to long ago and one of them brought the line "Excuse me but I shat in my bed, can I sleep in yours tonight?" Worst part? It actually worked

[@emilysmith2965]

What are people DOING out there

[@pixelzebra8440]

Bro 💀

[@0_dearghealach_083]

Excuse me?!

[@saccorhytus]

What the cow

[@elsandwich7481]

How the absolute fuck did that work

[@Thereischeeseindeed]

Him calling his partner his "other half" is actually so sweet

[@2cv693]

It's an old British saying (at least I've only heard older people say it), I'm pretty sure it's more common in t'North

[@neblolthecarnerd]

​@@2cv693I hear it a decent bit and I'm down south

[@Avendesora]

"better half" is the one I hear a lot in the pacific northwest of the US, personally

[@cursedbeans5560]

@@2cv693can agree,it is said a lot in the north,even by some of the modern generation

[@caitlinrix294]

​@@2cv693My boyfriend has been referring to me as such for the entirety of our relationship thus far. He's 30.

[@transbiologistthetransesto7956]

I keep trying to pick a favorite and I just keep rewatching. That one's my favorite

[@XYZB0RG]

I think transgender and biologist is a bit of an oxymoron, isn't it?

[@CR1MSONACE]

​@@XYZB0RGIf you had more than a basic biology textbook you would know Gender isn't just male or female. Mushrooms have roughly 6 Billion.

[@olivercharles2930]

@@XYZB0RGit is

[@norged]

@@XYZB0RG Truly

[@AstroTheKing1144]

"pubic hair dost not tangle if thou shave" was my favorite

[@JustAnEverydayAccount]

No, no they can’t. Out of any group of people ever, Reddit are the worst possible people to be charismatic

[@zorapianist]

Agreed. They're as charismatic as a wall

[@donpollo3154]

@@zorapianist even a wall is more inviting to run into than a redditor

[@SuperHGB]

​@@zorapianistThat's an insult to walls

[@EdnaK728]

Some people have told me that I was wrong to date Comic Book Guy because he looks like he spends an ungodly amount of time on Reddit

[@yell0w-man]

@@donpollo3154what about a disc mod

[@KMDT_BLITZ]

And like always. Reddit is just the equivalent of a classroom of 8th graders hicked off ecstacy

[@HashSl1ng1ngSlasher]

Tbh this is from the golden period 7 or 8 years ago. The platform has since botted up and devolved noticeably.

[@shadow_flux2304]

Yup. THATS WHY THAT HAPENED OMFG LAST UEAR WAS AWFUL😭😭😭😭💀

[@husky0098]

@@namantherockstar You seem legit. Though advertising in other people's comment sections isn't cool. That stuff can ruin your public image. I'll make an exception because you do actually make videos, but don't do this again.

[@BiggiecheeseAKAgod]

​@@husky0098 Bro they're a bot they literally spam this on a ton of videos in order to get views and subscribers, they definitely are NOT legit.

[@wingerwc]

Been there done that-

[@KITT.007]

“Let us get a table at McDicks” was my absolute favorite pickup line, made me snort

[@SkyEcho751]

The reaction of Matt telling his girlfriend a random pickup line constructed by the hive mind of reddit and her finding it nice is just, a knee-slapper.

[@tireiron3452]

It starts off normal, then there's always 1 guy who says some wack shit, and the rest of the redditors try to salvage the line. That's how we get "Girl, you are hotter then sunburns on my Aunt Pam."

[@rosepinkskyblue]

Then why does the wack shit get upvoted lol it’s obviously better that way

[@chinsaw2727]

Its as if you have rehearsed a pickup line, but as you go to ask the person out, you stutter out a slip of the tongue, then try to salvage it.

[@bonedude1286]

Do You Want To Sex? My Bed?

[@sleepdeep305]

“Are you my mom cause you look like my fathers wife”

[@bellhel227]

I genuinely love that line 😂😂😂

[@Un_prønøunceable]

This is one of my favorites now actually. I’m over here practically cripplingly sick and cackling my coughing ass off watching Matt’s videos with zero regret in regards to my sore throat

[@tommyl5319]

I have to keep rewinding because I miss the next ones from laughing 😂

[@Matt_Rose]

Feel better soon! ☺️

[@Fun_maths]

same

[@zetametallic]

Get well soon. Being ill is shit. X

[@arnerademacker]

Literally same, thank you for brightening our sick days, Matt!

[@wolf.haley48]

PLEASE SEQUAL THIS IS MY FAVORITE EVER

[@HenrySoloss]

Short answer: No Long answer: No, but with examples

[@strangecolouredbird]

If Matt ever does "Parents getting franchise names wrong", I once showed my Mum a song from DHMIS and she said "Is this from Dont trust me I'm naked? The one with the Duck?" ☠️

[@tailpig6417]

He already did that with movie names, with some other ones thrown in, so this would be a sequel

[@lalas181]

Man, I sure do love hit KZbin series turned somehow just as excellent TV show Don't Trust Me, I'm Naked

[@mazzy_ivy]

SKUH-HUUUULL EMOJAAAY

[@inkcloudss]

IM SORRY BUT THIS SO FUCKING HILARIOUS WHAT

[@TheNewOrchestra]

"Don't Trust Me, I'm Naked" sounds like the worst porn parody in the history of porn parodies.

[@tornadey018]

I'm surprised no one dared start with the word "Never"

[@okesjsjs]

Have

[@epos.nephilo]

I

[@L3NORE.RAWR.X3]

​@@epos.nephiloeaten

[@L3NORE.RAWR.X3]

​@@pleaseenteraname1574hair

[@LobsterMobsterTheCrispiestLoaf]

Weiner

[@goldenapplesaga5446]

Bro im only half way through this video and this is proving to be my favorite Matt Rose video

[@fiedlerheise]

"Are you going to poop first?" Dayum, I knew dates could get weird, but emotionally scarring card games never crossed my mind

[@isabellacrump103]

Off topic but like why does Matt’s wife sound like the nicest lady ever LOL

[@Matt_Rose]

Ye she's a goodun

[@koiifsh]

she sounds like she makes the best cookies

[@j_cannot_type]

SHE IS 😭😭😭💗💗💗

[@mr_dumbgogles4281]

Yeah I met her personally yerterday night, she is a sweetheart ❤ 😊

[@j_cannot_type]

​@@mr_dumbgogles4281is this sarcastic or not IM GOING INSANE

[@IagreewithDmitri]

I don't want to alarm you Matt, but Bamboo has turned into a cabbage.

[@nealjroberts4050]

I don't want to alarm you but that wasn't his Bamboo.

[@olivebrosnan4437]

@@nealjroberts4050r/whooosh

[@rob3rtbigtoegaming431]

No, that's not Bamboo, that's a penis. Remember, cabbage is just penis in disguise.

[@werul]

@@namantherockstar how old are you?

[@thething.s]

​@@namantherockstarbeg more

[@AlexReynard]

I don't know _why_ this is my favorite video you've made, but I am in literal tears laughing right now. The cabbage foreshadowing was pristine brilliance.

[@leonardrechain2626]

for those who didnt understand the french part, it can be roughly translated to: Hi, i burned your lover.

[@captainpalegg2860]

fun fact: there actually is a sub specifically for this kind of thing: r/onewordeach . not just pickup lines, either; could be anything from "what should i get my girlfriend for her birthday? owe" to "help i stole owen wilson's lucky underwear and now he's sending a hitman after me! owe" might be fun to do a video on that sometime.

[@myyoutubeaccount4167]

Sounds fun

[@N95j]

why is owe at the end of both sentences? and im guessing owe = one word each.. but my question still stands

[@captainpalegg2860]

exactly@@N95j

[@MandMs05]

@@N95j I have two guesses, the first one I thought of first the second one I think is more likely 1: That's how you end a sentence, similar to "goodbye" on r/askouija 2: These are post titles, and they're formatted to have "one word each" at the end of each title.

[@fyra_cat2119]

​@N95j probably so if someone sees the post out of context, they know it's one word each

[@elisecode2212]

WAIT Matt stroking the cabbage at the beginning was foreshadowing. “Cabbage is just penis in disguise.” I feel so clever.

[@ce7624]

You ARE so clever! I didn't realize until I read this comment, haha!

[@elisecode2212]

@@ce7624 thanks lol

[@SSYX336]

Having pains in my side, watched this, pains got worse, 10/10.

[@ZUPKA_]

3:22 I CHOKED ON MY WATER HELP- 😭😭😭

[@hobbytunez2519]

For those who don’t know, google translate tells me that the French one means “Hello, I’m in love.” Maybe everyone else can tell and I’m the idiot who only knows 1 French word, but it’s telling that the only somewhat affectionate pick-up line Reddit could come up with isn’t in English at all.

[@N95j]

damn

[@OntarioTrafficMan]

3:15 it says "Hello, I burned infatuated" where burned is the adjective, not the verb. Basically it makes no sense.

[@hobbytunez2519]

@@OntarioTrafficMan Ah… that’s more on brand for Reddit. This is why I had the “google translate” caveat. That’s probably what they used to make the post.

[@MetaBloxer]

​@@hobbytunez2519"brûlée" is probably from hearing "creme brûlée"

[@hobbytunez2519]

@@MetaBloxer Okay, upon retrying the translation, I got something closer to what it actually means. I must’ve mistyped it or something the first time but you’re right, thinking about it now, they almost definitely just chose a random French word.

[@scarlett5065]

Moral of the story: no, reddit can not, in fact, write pick up lines with one word at a time Edit: The replies 💀💀 that took a dark turn FAST

[@dantelawrence4676]

And I don't think KZbin, Twitter, 4Chan or Tumblr can either.

[@itsAGMbtw]

​@@dantelawrence4676bet. Are

[@idcgaming518]

​@@dantelawrence4676I don't know. Tumblr went through a phase a few years back of absolutely nailing pickup lines.

[@RushWheeler]

Idk, "You look hotter than a sunburn on my aunt Pam" actually works pretty well.

[@pvzgamerlegisniana6492]

can youtube do it though?

[@user-nu8xi4sl1e]

"My horoscope told me the secret recipe to your heart" would've been so good if those added on words weren't there-

[@QuadteRr]

For me, this is the best video on the channel. I just come back to it about once a month and can't breathe properly because while laughing at one hilariously delivered line, I hear another and laugh even harder. Simply brilliant.

[@justin2308]

“I’m. Sorry.” Nono, that comes AFTER the pickup line.

[@necron8992]

Matt sitting there with a cabbage between his legs was genius

[@DatFrogGuy]

exactly what I thought 😂

[@Stellar3929]

I’m glad someone other than me noticed

[@2nukitv218]

He was petting the cabbage.

[@mazzy_ivy]

@@2nukitv218 yeah

[@stardewofpyrrhia4381]

“Cabbage is just a…” OH

[@jwensauer2080]

"Black tights lightly skim your beautiful yet ghostly bum hair" is the all time favourite now :')

[@Nychthemeron07]

This is the funniest video I've ever seen ever and that's not an exaggeration

[@Glegh]

Matt caressing a lettuce made me feel something, something really wierd

[@mrtwistr]

remember cabbage is just penis in disguise....

[@MielBeta]

"Lettuce is just a pp in disguise" WAIT

[@dragos1239]

​@@MielBeta so he was masturbating the whole time...

[@mokubah]

It made me feel weird the first time too, but you just need to embrace the feeling. You will learn soon enough, then unlock a world you thought you could only ever visit in your dreams.

[@ajmkittens9_YT]

​@@MielBetaOH WAIT I JUST REALIZED TOO

[@unnamellie]

"Can you help me financially" I felt that😢

[@thedetermined1]

About as smooth as sandpaper.

[@RedPandaKT]

I love the foreshadowing for the 'cabbage is just penis in disguise' at the start there

[@rcotton3137]

The way he deliver it make it sound like an actual compliment 2:43

[@ThomasTheThermonuclearBomb]

It was, haven't you heard of that classic line?

[@TheScrunker]

man, your comedic timing is ON POINT. I was laughing my ass of the entire video because of it

[@Country.Cowboy.Solace]

“doge doge doge doge doge and she left” “ *starts singing sweet caroline-* “

[@PepperOhNo]

2:19 my favorite genre of flirting is literally just “uhhhh I uhhhh intercourse”

[@stapoldy_propaganda_account]

3:17 "hello, i burned in love."

[@officerdonut27]

thank you

[@stapoldy_propaganda_account]

​@@officerdonut27 you're welcome

[@Plut0TheCrypt1d]

thank you goo

[@stapoldy_propaganda_account]

@@Plut0TheCrypt1d i'm not goo i'm the stapoldy propaganda account...💔💔

[@Plut0TheCrypt1d]

@@stapoldy_propaganda_account wowzers

[@aidanaylward9237]

"girl can you help me financially" Signed, the aroace community

[@yuzamei]

REAL?!

[@aidanaylward9237]

​@@yuzameireal :)

[@shinekitten7669]

so real

[@mrvoidschannel359]

1:43 straight forward line, got me dead lmao

[@Skywolfhd20]

0:27 fun fact: this can be made *worse* "girl, are you from mississippi? cause your the only miss whose piss i wanna sipppi"

[@monicaraybrandt]

i'm guessing you watch elira pendora

[@Skywolfhd20]

@@monicaraybrandt i used to

[@robinchesterfield42]

I assumed that's what they were originally going for, only it got screwed up. ;P

[@sammieegoldwand]

Last night I randomly thought of the pickup line “are you a siren because you make me wanna jump into the ocean” It was 12 am and I now realize how fucking horrible that is.

[@derekeastman7771]

Are you a siren? Because I’d jump in the ocean after you. Still not great…

[@thekicker2517]

Are you a siren? Because you're a man-eater with a voice that makes sailors drown themselves. That's definitely not going to work.

[@kh6853]

Are you a siren? Because you make me want to tie myself to the mast

[@alpha_c.]

2:11 the “(comma)” was a genius idea ngl

[@knockingjack]

fr he thought of that

[@luna_nova_09]

…can you explain the difference please? My brain isn’t co-operating with me today

[@alpha_c.]

@@luna_nova_09the initial idea you’d expect with “kids” is something about making babies, but “kids,” with the comma, implies that the person is talking to children, so pedophilia

[@agentmc7868]

​​@@luna_nova_09"kids now" Is like talking to kids or just referring to them And "kids, now" Is like saying "You should get pregnant, now!"

[@luna_nova_09]

@@agentmc7868 ohhh

[@n018b5]

no not the cabbage, it was so innocent at the start of the video.

[@kniviritsyn]

“Help me blow up my thang” had me dying 💀

[@TOTALLYnotmaddix]

“Is your dad a terrorist? Cuz you are the bomb” WHAT THE FUCK

[@GryphinHusky]

I was in an absolutely horrid mood, but now I'm crying and wheezing from laughing so hard. Ten out of ten, Matt.

[@ursidae97]

These dudes are mathematically determining the funniest cursed sentences

[@kibertyisgay]

I hope everyone noticed he was petting a CABBAGE eat the beginning. 🤨

[@roundy4717]

“Cabbage is just penis in disguise.” Matt: (petting his cabbage in front of the world)

[@KingDuckGuy]

This is the most redditors have ever worked together and it's just beautiful. Like art.

[@skinsarentskill259]

look up r/place

[@Scypek]

@@skinsarentskill259 and of course r/AskOuija.

[@thereyvan]

​@@Scypek as someone on r/AskOuija i can confirm this

[@symmetricksambigrams]

​@@skinsarentskill259no this is better than r/place

[@aidanaylward9237]

​@@skinsarentskill259getting flashbacks to bad apple being expertly drawn while Canada can't draw a fucking leaf

[@johnalexanderaylward]

This is the first video in a long time that consistently kept me laughing for a good 97% of it

[@tinyahhquarks]

my favorite is "KIDS. NOW."

[@madysonandres9571]

Reddit making up pickup lines is the funniest joke of the year.

[@ftwgaming0]

1:56 I love the thought of him not having soundproofing, Neighbours hear that late at night and decide "lol no."

[@n1ch0l4st8]

1:48 HE SAID IT! HE SAID TW@!!! FINALLY!!!

[@bruce5015]

AT 3:55 I TRIED TO TURN THE VOLUME DOWN BECAUSE MY MOM WAS NEXT TO ME BUT INSTEAD I TURNED IT ALL THE WAY UP 😭 😭

[@Wildflower485]

💀💀💀

[@VictoriaWolczynska]

R.I.P. Bruce 1978-2023

[@CDG-PRODUCTIONS]

I remember in school back in the day I overheard 2 of my classmates talking about girls. In that conversation one of them said that how he got with his girlfriend was by following her everywhere she went, and when she asked why, he responded: *"Because my mother told me to always follow my dreams"* This has got to be the best pickup line I've ever heard. But I would be very careful doing this with someone!

[@alansmithee419]

Maybe if you're out with some friends you can tail them for the outing. But yeah don't start randomly following someone. Very unlikely to go well.

[@avvy0.2]

2:37 Matt is a rizz God fr

[@yggdarsilyae6807]

Didn't have such a good laugh in a long time. Worst is, "Everybody wants romance but nobody wants my gonads" resonated somehow

[@jaycampbell5145]

Its been 3 months and this is still my favourite video ever

[@CR1MSONACE]

It's been ~7 months now, is it still your favourite video?

[@jaycampbell5145]

@@CR1MSONACE yes actually :) Closely rivaled by the r/askouija video though

[@GIGATHEMAD]

3:34 got me💀

[@alecity4877]

your other half's reaction to the aunt pam's sunburn pickup line was the second best part of the video, only surpassed by the face you did afterwards.

[@wolfsweet1046]

the best pick up line I've ever heard is "Are you an entire cheesecake? because i want to eat you and regret it later"

[@HeisenbergFam]

Born too early to explore Space Born too late to explore Earth Born just in time to witness Reddit's pickup lines

[@trystankitty5393]

.

[@epos.nephilo]

Okay Heisenberg. Don’t you ever smuggle methamphetamine into another comment section.

[@SweetKake24]

@@epos.nephilo he subscribed to everyone ever

[@trystankitty5393]

@@SweetKake24huh

[@grosskidsid]

WHY ARE YOU EVERYWHERE (you have impeccable taste)

[@bag_head7]

there’s something nice about Matt referring to his partner as his other half.

[@RADZIO895]

that's not his partner, he literally split himself in half

[@inker_monkey]

he used a knockoff four sword

[@lian9276]

5:13 hey that's Princess Vanessa, I've seen her comment around a ton of videos

[@Baku_bro]

2:02 that’s my favourite one 😂

[@moonbatt]

Do not date the guy who asked, “What is a condom?”!

[@husky0098]

No, no, he wants you to demonstrate, like when people say they don't know how shampoo works.

[@moonbatt]

@@husky0098 😂😂 Is that really a thing?! 😂😂

[@husky0098]

@@moonbatt It's a classic

[@moonbatt]

@@husky0098 WOW! 🤣🤣🤣

[@MamaTrixxieAsmr]

​@@moonbattlook up what the labelling on snow fairy shampoo says lol