Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom - Nostalgia Critic

[@ChannelAwesome]

With Christmas around the corner, what movies would you like reviewed? Support this week's charity - www.hfotusa.org/

[@iHeartsNostalgiaPit]

The Nuttiest Nutcracker! Buster and Chauncey's silent night, actually those are the only two that I really, really want at the moment I'll think of another one hopefully soon oh wait, Elf, I'm not sure that's aging well, and Home alone 5 that was filmed where I live

[@dylan8736]

Con Air? Robocop? Plan 9 from Outer Space? The Stuff? Miami Connection? One more suggestion, Josh and the promised land

[@supercool2898]

Channel Awesome Bionicle 1-3

[@michellerichardson1318]

Rivew tmnt next mutation or Grimmlens 2 or both

[@paintedpig3021]

Well Doug always talks about Arthur Christmas so why not that

[@Judgement_Kazzy]

"Blue's still out there. You're just gonna let her die?" "Well, yeah." *credits*

[@douglasrau5094]

Only intelligent line in the entire movie.

[@theamazinggamerperson3474]

Honestly that would have been a good ending

[@WhosLeroyJetson]

Roll credits

[@randalgraves6979]

Ding!? No one said Fallen Kingdom 🤔

[@Silver5kull]

@@randalgraves6979 wrong channel pal

[@jdj1222]

Just thought it worth mentioning that the shooting star isn't pointless; it was a nod to Steven Spielberg. In Jaws they managed to accidentally capture a shooting star during one of the finalized shots and Spielberg has put a shooting star in movies since then.

[@astrowolvez]

Weird

[@michaelbremer35]

Astro Wolvez but cool!

[@thedopdeity]

Not an ounce of that sounds necessary so...pointless.

[@wellhello5098]

@@thedopdeity it's a quirk, might be pointless but it's cool none the less

[@ashishhembrom3905]

@@wellhello5098 why? You already have all the cool stuff in the movie though.

[@Fordo007]

I still have no idea how Claire isn't in jail or buried in civil law suits from the families of everyone who died on her watch... like her secretary who was about to get married and died trying to save Claire's nephews that Claire didn't even think to ask about... real likable character there...

[@suchomimus9460]

Fordo007 Secretary? You mean Zara?

[@player3productions502]

You mean the one who really didn't watch the kids? I didn't even know she was going to get married.

[@willier47]

Well they cartoonishly explained it away saying they Paid a record 1 or 100 billion in total (Forget) in Lawsuit settlements. Please a company would go bankrupt with how many people would be suing them. Let alone they played the government as completely devoid of intelligence or any competence. Just because they not messing with the island doesn't mean they would let dumb fucks keep going or touch it themselves.

[@navabeasy]

Don't over think this half ass movie more than the people who made it lol

[@MegaDragonmark]

​@EbberDeeMills you know vic hoskins was the leader of jurassic world private security force soooo i don't know maybe the whole thing was sabotaged by an idiot that was in the lead of their security force and a technically on the run genetic scientist that were planing on making and selling genetically modified dinosaurs that caused everything to end up the way they were. vic wasn't completely so secret about his whole plan of making weapons out of raptors. so Claire wasn't or the actual head of the company wasn't part of the blame though though the company does get closed down now.

[@destructo2030]

The little girl is the real supervillain , I ready for the sequel where she manically laughs while watching girls scouts being eaten and petting her kitty inside the thunder dome

[@greenstorm5568]

Thunder dome, then we will see goldberg vs blue for who's the real dinosaur

[@the_once-and-future_king.]

Petting her kitty? Please tell me you _do_ mean a feline!

[@camilogarciaylasaari1857]

Replace the kitty with a velociraptor and I can see that happening

[@markcasadevall9509]

they never bring up that point in the sequel

[@elder-woodsilverstein7716]

Ooo, how about instead of a kitty, it’s a Compsognathus.

[@phant0]

*- "Hey, I have just invented the most advanced weapon system ever. Want to buy it? It's worth 25 million dollars"* - "Maybe. How does it work?" *- "It's simple. You have that rifle that you point at someone that you want dead and then push a button on the side of it. Then a barely controllable genetically engineered monster comes out of no where and kills that person."* - "Wait, you've spent millions to develop a gun that kills the people it is pointed at when you press a button on it?" *- "Yep. Well, actually most of the budget went to create the whole giant killer monster thing that comes with the gun"* - "But an ordinary gun would do this without the need for an extremely expensive and impractical monster." *...* *...* *- "I... Wish I had thought of that sooner."*

[@zamirewilson7424]

Yeah, that will always bothered me when I think about what they planned for "Yellow." I mean O know it's a prototype and they could be working on other stuff but......Why????? 😓😞

[@SaltyNewt]

Look up what a laser designator is

[@phant0]

@@SaltyNewt Watch the movie again and notice what the laser designator is mounted on.

[@SaltyNewt]

phant0 that’s a laser sight. Completely different from a designator.

[@phant0]

@@SaltyNewt Yes, you are right. We can all tell that you are well versed in fictional dinosaur-based weaponry. Now you can leave happy. Nevermind the joke that went five hundred feet over your head.

[@mattmanley3520]

Her writing sucked, but the kid who played Mazie is a pretty good actress. She’s works with what she has...which is nothing

[@itsblitz4437]

Yeah I thought her character would be used better.

[@89taklung]

I think they should hurry making a "the last of us" movie and make her Ellie!

[@OjamaIndigo]

John Smith you realize they’re talking about the actress not the character right?

[@chrisjohnson4738]

Yeah, I love Critic's line "No matter how charming an actress you are, honey, you WILL be the worst part of this movie."

[@gabby_gcb]

stfu its a movie chill

[@geardog24]

Come on admit it, Chris Pratt and Blue had the best romance in the entire movie.

[@asher8754]

It’s blackly Dino old yeller who doesn’t love that

[@Infinity-xn4dk]

True

[@theresacherco9543]

Better than twilight

[@MoonShadowWolfe]

That was the entire reason I was glad I saw it.

[@vice166]

Careless Whisper starts playing

[@samueldavid1621]

They got the character motivations switched as well. Claire, whose only exposure to dinosaurs is almost being eaten by them, should want to see them dead. Owen, who has spent his career proving dinosaurs are capable of being trained and friendly like dogs, should want to see them live. That is just one of many confusing decisions made whilst making this movie.

[@pipedream2556]

I get where youre coming from but in a better written movie i can imagine them making their views clearer and Claire's distance from them for so long could let her see them more like any animal in a zoo while Owen spent all that training time well aware that anything going wrong could end his life at any moment and knows that most of the world wont stand a chance against them so its not a bad thing that theyre no longer going to be a potential risk for the rest of the world...until he gets pulled over to thinking of them as any other dangerous animal and went on the rescue mission... Yeah a better written movie would probably have to totally change the plot 😅

[@Kreinsamer]

31:09 "But [they] think bed sheets are indestructible bomb shelters." Wait, you mean they're not?!

[@BigAL68xyz]

That means the monster under my bed could have torn me apart any time it wanted to! It still could! AAAGGGHHH!

[@simbasorariku3]

I imagined that in Bakugo's voice.

[@Thatonegirl989]

Kreinsamer no they definitely are, critic doesn’t know what he’s talking about.

[@KingCakeGator]

I think you’d know if bed sheets were bomb shelter Kacchan

[@WhatIsThatThingDoing]

That would be a hilarious thing to try. Surviving a nuke or gunshots by way of a single sheet.

[@Tachyon836]

Also, Dinosaurs would make terrible weapons. Even if you could get them to obey you perfectly, they're just big targets to hit. Sure the Ankylosaurus has armor that teeth can't pierce, but that means nothing to high caliber rounds or explosives. A literal minefield would render your entire fleet of raptors useless. An autoturret like what North Korea has would kill any dinosaur. One tank, just ONE. Literally no dinosaur could do anything to it. The T Rex could step on an Abrams and it wouldn't do anything. Wanna move it? Good luck, it can weigh over 60 tons, more than 10x what the T Rex weighs. If that gun fires, the T Rex is red paste, that's like a 110mm bore cannon. Not to mention jets, attack choppers, drone strikes, or worse yet....mustard gas and the like is only banned against humans. We could literally just gas the things, or shell them with artillery, or use another banned weapon. Sound. Anything over 190 dB would be lethal. 210 dB is loud enough to rend holes in steel. I still don't see why we couldn't just nuke Isla Nublar. Fuck the dinos

[@aformofmatter8913]

To be fair, I think WMDs would still be illegal to use on dinos because humans might get hurt by them too; one of the big reasons chemical weapons are banned is they are difficult to target, so human collateral damage would be likely.

[@Jelly_Jan]

Its like how they fire like an entire magazine into a dino and it shrugs it off! If dinosaurs were back and faced with any kind of modern weapon, that fight would last less than 5 mins. Plus, I mean "Lets release all these dinosaurs on american suburbanites! What could possibly go wrong?" XD

[@ethanblack940]

I agree. The whole using dinosaurs as weapons idea is just not a very good idea with the technology we have today however, it probably would have worked half a millennium ago though

[@pisces2569]

Beni not to mention the care needed to take care of them. It’s far easier to maintain a tank or any weapon than an animal

[@simbasorariku3]

If it makes you feel any better, the government napalm the island in the book, and the Telltale game reveals the government was planning on doing that until something off-screen stopped them.

[@dadeleemurphy85]

Blue: "It's Over Owen! I have the high ground!"

[@zpeter2590]

Zero Cool if a Sci-fi fantasy movie with space wizards and laser swords have a better understanding in lava physics than this, then you know you have a problem

[@insertnamehere7925]

Mary:"They're alive, like me" Me: THEY'RE DINOSAURS, YOU'RE A HUMAN, you can't bite a man arm clean off but they can, hell most of them could either stomp on you, or eat you whole.

[@ursaminor9780]

Evidently 2018 was the year Chris Pratt started in big budget franchise entries where humanity is doomed by a single character’s dumb decision.

[@Zacman1123]

@@ursaminor9780 wow you're right.

[@masatotanaka999]

Agent J-23-1991 there was a part where the camera focuses on her eyes and i almost thought they were going to make her part dinosaur.

[@RedCrusader-ph2vk]

I COULD do all those things, you don't know my life

[@insertnamehere7925]

@Jerry Graham Now yes the herbivores wouldn't eat them but a little kid just getting to close can easily get stomped by 1

[@BessieRiggs]

Wu wasn’t just a low-key lab rat like they portrayed him in the first movie. Crichton wrote him as the lead geneticist in Jurassic Park. But, like Hammond, he was killed in the book.

[@mariobeaupre1626]

Yeah but Holywood Frankensteined the shit out of most characters in movie history

[@konradpietrzak3842]

Easy, he will die in dominion

[@taker30055]

He got away to create an empire later on and then took on the persona of "Fiendish Evil Doctor Wu" and created some malt liquor to shrink black men's d$@k. Fortunately he met his end at the hands of Black Dynamite.

[@AlejandroLZuvic]

I never saw him as a low-key employee. Maybe I missed something.

[@questworldiangreenknight7455]

@@AlejandroLZuvic SAME!!!

[@BrixieAnn]

I'm pretty sure the Jurassic films are just the prequels to The Flintstones at this point.

[@zpeter2590]

Brixie Ann ok that makes TOO much sense!!!!!!

[@dylankaiser5546]

*x-files music plays*

[@IsaPodrasky]

Flintstones. They're the Flintstones. They're part of a post-apocalyptic family. From the Isla of Nublar...

[@WorldWalker128]

LOL

[@imaadshahrukh4829]

Brixie Ann Could be. Considering how in the Flintstones there is Christmas, and modern-looking tech made with stone.

[@kainrazielim4571]

Shes a clone in a Jurassic Park universe - doesn't that mean she's partly a frog ?

[@nanuqo2006]

Lockwood's daughter's DNA wasn't millions of years old, so no need to fill in the nonexistent genetic gaps with anything else

[@ursaminor9780]

GojiraGuy 1954 I’m pretty sure they were joking.

[@codylgarcia]

Well you’re 50% a banana, so what’s the difference?

[@kikiwhite_creates]

Nova JT oh lord I’m getting Splice flashbacks🤢🤢🤢

[@niansillabffs]

SHE CAN CAMOUFLAGE

[@DWAkhaten]

14:34 - 15:18 Doug's hatred for this side character gives me life.

[@JPGH_Extras]

As a Jurassic Park Fan... Yes. Same here.

[@AckleyAttackTV]

Well that's nothing. Wait until you see Detective Pikachu. No really, Justice Smith actually does a much better job in Detective Pikachu.

[@nine_tails137]

Glad I'm not the only one who wanted to see Justice Smith get eaten. That character was annoying AF!

[@ladypool1404]

@@AckleyAttackTV He's good in Dunbeons and dragons honor among thieves too! Simon is a likable character, he's not annoying and his magic is cool 🙂I like when he saves everyone from a giant dragon, that was awesome!

[@AckleyAttackTV]

@@ladypool1404 Oh, yeah. I agree. Justice Smith was also really good in Dungeons and Dragons: Honor Among Thieves. Such a shame hardly anyone seen that movie and I think it deserves more love.

[@zorgolon4100]

The protagonists try to keep the dinosaurs alive the same exact way Hollywood keeps the Jurassic films alive

[@MrHodoAstartes]

Not really. Making more and releasing them in a planned way into controlled facilities would be the smart way to save dinosaurs as a living species.

[@CyberSpider35]

Only Halloween 2018-style remake can save it now.

[@koichidignitythief7429]

@@CyberSpider35 It wasn't a remake. It just ignored every other movie before it.

[@ColinG943]

Actually, this movie is still really good and evolves the franchise, bringing it in a new direction, which I love!

[@josuealmeida9571]

The same way that Konami tries to keep the Metal Gear franchise alive

[@Gezere9]

"Malcom when did you turn into a white woman?" I figuratively died. Also the T-Rex is like the Solid Snake of dinosaurs. She's a goddamn NINJA! Wide open field and no one sees or hears her until she dies to murder another dino.

[@treyowen9213]

Metal Gear kicks ass. 😎

[@FoxUnitNell]

under the cardboard box is where she is before jumping out from no where.

[@sevuvidramus1717]

T-rex's have been recently proven to be quite stealthy, along with a long distance call that no-joke is the genetic known sound of death and nightmares

[@K.Gthealmighty]

thats because she was on her toes

[@raggens]

Speaking of Metal Gear, anyone notice the writer who wrote this film is also announced for the screenplay of the Metal Gear film?

[@corbinhaynes5754]

I think the "they're alive like me" bit was about her being a clone but it would've worked better had she known from the start and been treated poorly by other people progressively getting worse and worse the whole movie so that by the end she no longer related to humans but only other clones. It would've made her reasoning more clear and still given her a bit of sympathy since we'd understand the why even though we don't like what the consequences will be

[@mephistovonfaust]

Even then, letting them out is the single stupidest decision in the entire movie. When Claire was about to press the button I was thinking "No, please, you can't be that stupid." What a relieve when she didn't, but then we got this idiot kid to do it. The only good characters in the entire movie were Owen an Blue. That's it.

[@K.Gthealmighty]

WOW let’s just look over all the trauma she had to endure that one night and the fact that she’s a kid

[@CompletelyNewguy]

Here's what would have worked: Having someone tell her what she just did. "I hope you understand that you caused a mass extinction of the animal kingdom. We'll survive, we always have, even more so thanks to our technology. The animals however will be left at the mercy of these killing machines. Understand that you killed them all. But hey since you're a fellow clone of them why don't you go talk to them? See how that works out."

[@K.Gthealmighty]

hodor I’m not saying what she did wasn’t bad I’m saying what she did wasn’t unrealistic or unexpected after all she endured that one night idiot

[@K.Gthealmighty]

hodor really there’s clearly no point in discussing this with you you’re obviously just another troll

[@gianfrancoespinoza8828]

"I'm not as soft as your combat implys" I'm sorry but you're a civilian who works at a computer making BuzzFeed quizzes on what your zodiac symbol says what dinosaur you are, they are a mercilessly Navy SEAL trained squadron. KNOW YOUR PLACE

[@Eccegato]

Well, in the end she did SOMEHOW managed to survive (ironically by being rescued by the most cowardly character in the movie), while many of those mercenaries are slaughtered by dinosaurs. GOD THIS MOVIE IS STUPID.

[@onemanarmysswampparty]

THE ROCK SAYS KNOW YOUR ROLE AND SHUT YOUR MOUTH

[@nolilado5452]

@@Eccegato Pretty sure that's called "Plot Armor"

[@adamgrunther1367]

Rob is a perfect John Hammond!

[@Seanatonin]

Miracle on 34th Street with Mara Wilson anyone?

[@Seanatonin]

@@SQUIDBEARSTUDIO you forgot the last time the Critic reviewed a Mara Wilson film. What she did was unholy and unkind to the Critc

[@K.Gthealmighty]

no he is not

[@patrickoliver9133]

Spared no expense...

[@AaronTheBlackDragon]

They have a great setup for the next movie... I wonder what they gonna focus on instead when they make it.

[@Dalipsingh111111]

Instead of a Movie about Dinosaurs going after humans and becomming a real threat or using them in warfare, they will make a movie about hunting the dinosaurs down and the main charakters are trying to save them.

[@hernanhenriquez6778]

It's gonna be about blue getting on the US Senate trying to enforce dinosaur rights with the main argument that they are not weapons and their gonna spread the word by using hashtags such as #dinosaurlifematters #dinaosaursareplptoo #usedasweaponsMetoo

[@pheunithpsychic-watertype9881]

@@hernanhenriquez6778 I believe it

[@nidohime6233]

Nah, it would be a Mad Max dystopian world with the last of humankind behind huge walls like in Attack on Titan. But with DINOSAUUUUURRRRSSSSSS!!! \:V/ 🦕🦖🦕🦖🦕🦖🦕🦖🦕🦖

[@zanesage6857]

Sigh... ikr, the whole set up for the next movie is the only reason this one even exists... if they screw that up to... I just hope they don't...

[@joegreenwell5476]

9:56. What's worse here is that unlike other movies, they didn't even just meet each other in the first one. They literally just went back to being broken up like in the first one. I just they just copied and pasted it and forgot to change it.

[@joegreenwell5476]

They sure seemed like each other since they kept kissing each other.

[@idealab5289]

Joe Greenwell They kissed like... once

[@joegreenwell5476]

I remember they kissed once he took down a pterodactyl and when they found each other in the infirmary type area at the end. That was their whole story. They were dating and broke up but the whole deal with the Indominus Rex ended up getting them together again. EDIT: I looked it up and they don't kiss in the infirmary, but they look at each other really nicely and they say they should stick together as they walk out together.

[@joegreenwell5476]

Do you guys just run around kissing people with no romantic meaning?

[@joegreenwell5476]

@@ninjahombrepalito1721 logically they shouldn't have because they have little chemistry, but that's how they wrote it.

[@ajsteenkamp3070]

That girl that freed the dinosuars moment has the same energy of the end of Mulan 2:" hey. Shitloads of people are gonna die, but fuck you, becuas love."

[@nine_tails137]

Mazie: I had to. They're alive. Like me. Well thanks kid, you doomed us all!

[@johnteets490]

The clone daughter thing is implied to be the reason Lockwood and Hammond disagreed and split up. Not saying that makes it better, that's just the "why" of it.

[@Dargonhuman]

Yea, I guessed it abut 40 minutes before they revealed it when Lockwood kept being super evasive about her mom and wouldn't let her see any pictures of her mom. Even then, when they did reveal it, the characters reacted more like, "Huh, well, that happened," and move on way too quickly.

[@557deadpool]

@@Dargonhuman i called the twist the moment they started referencing her

[@Ghostwalker2061]

And it's also possible that she maybe part raptor.

[@TufteMotorsport]

@@Ghostwalker2061 Hahahaha! What the fuck man? Somebody didn't pay attention.

[@johnteets490]

@@Ghostwalker2061 Can't tell if you're joking or not. Regardless, there was no hint of her being a hybrid. Lockwood never is said to have wanted that, only wanting his daughter back, and given thatvshe looks exactly like her mother in that one picture of her mother as a child that she sees, I'd say she's a straight-up clone. It kind of makes sense when you think about it: cloning humans, a complex but current species, seems like a step towards cloning extinct ones. The only problem is the moral dilemma of cloning a fellow human, and all that that entails for both the parent and child. Also, it sounded kind of like Lockwood only really wanted to clone his daughter: he had no original interest in the dinosaurs, it seemed. But, it also seemed like he was a close friend of Hammond, since they started together alone. And what with Hammond having passed away and the dinosaurs following closely behind, he decides to do this for Hammond's memory. That's my take on it. Honestly, I want a movie exploring the history between Hammond and Lockwood, and how it all began. It'd be a nice tale.

[@morgangobin9985]

My god! Rob looks JUST like his dad in that John Hammond makeup!

[@MandleRoss]

Yeah, must have been a laugh when Doug saw him. Hope he took a photo with Dad.

[@hanyuu05]

Jesus, the one chick's laughter from Garbage Pail Kids felt less forced than Claire's.

[@Shadowpack95]

theoretically the blood transfusion could work but probably only once, a second time would most likely kill Blue, Dog blood has been successfully transfused to Cats when it was the only type available, so its not entirely out of the realm of possibility for a Trex to give blood to a Velociraptor

[@mr.mystery9940]

Yeah, but a T-Rex is still not the best choice for it. There were more better donors and less dangerous ones for it on a ship, like Galimimus

[@Quickpatch12]

@@mr.mystery9940 like there were no other species of rapters to take blood from?

[@mr.mystery9940]

@Quickpatch12 Gallimimus was a better choice since cladistically, it's closer to Dromeosaurids than Tyrannosauridae

[@footclann0043]

Rob killed that John Hammond role😂😂😂

[@ironcladnomad5639]

"Hey, Rob, how would you feel about playing John Hammond in the Fallen Kingdom review?" *"I'll show you."*

[@QuartuvLarry]

He's like the coolest douchebag

[@olleselin]

@@QuartuvLarry Yeah

[@timothymorris157]

Which is exactly why he’s gonna be featured in Jurassic World Covenant. Lmfao 🤣

[@user-dr2yz8um3d]

Wait that was a role? 😂

[@sploosh578]

Not to be THAT guy but... That was a Brachiosaurus, not Brontosaurus. ...I'll see myself out.

[@Kaldin0203]

LITERALLY looked through the comments to find this comment. Thank you, good sir.

[@K.Gthealmighty]

no be that guy point out how stuiped it was for doug to mistake the brachiosaurus for the brontosaurus

[@maxis2778]

:) your a funny guy

[@tinyvigil1513]

Fg

[@MaguireMemes]

odblog Doesn’t mean anything he mistakes the brachiosaurus for a brontosaurus.

[@Codraroll]

Worst thing in this movie for me: The dinosaurs escaping into the wild is seen as some sort of apocalyptic event. But the first act of the movie (as well as Jurassic Park 2, for that matter) shows those very same dinosaurs being captured with relative ease in their natural habitat by a band of mercenaries. Besides, how many dinosaurs were there in the big escape? 50? You know what they call a species with 50 specimens left in the wild? Critically endangered, that's what. And they weren't even of the same species. Even if they all miraculously survive this new climate none of them has ever seen before, with all that implies for food availability or their chance to stay warm in winter, inbreeding would do them in within a couple of generations. And that's before considering how many trophy hunters there are who'd like to have a dinosaur head on their mantelpiece.

[@suchomimus9460]

Erlend Andenæs Aren’t you forgetting some people?

[@jamesoleary2476]

Erlend Andenæs yeah they say it would take 50 people to propagate the human race. 2 T. rex aren't gonna be save the species.

[@PaveMentman]

@@jamesoleary2476 To be fair though, in the original / first "Jurassic Park"-things they reproduced asexually / via parthenogenesis. And as far I for one am aware, there has been no mention whether the "Jurassic World"-staff were able or even willing to gene-splice(?) this feature off. --- --- ---

[@cpenner7086]

jeez did you even pay attention to the movie or wait god forbid you actually use your brain. the dinosaurs can be now ILLEGALLY cloned by nefarious people.

[@fenixiliusstrife1253]

Which will do what against a species with NUCLEAR EXPLOSIVE type technology. The whole thing in the last two movies about dinosaurs being "weapons" is stupid. The human race has bullets, missiles, and bombs, WTF is a dinosaur going to do against that exactly. Die, that is all they will do. It is such a stupid premise.

[@jamesverner9132]

I want to see the next film JUST to have a body counter for the deaths by dinosaurs. Every single one will be the clone girls fault. It would be hilarious.

[@benmiller5015]

Bro, how disappointed must you have been lol I agree with you it would have been cool but I just had to torment you by bringing your attention back to this comment lol

[@nine_tails137]

When I first saw Mazie press the button to release the dinosaurs, my response was: "Way to go kid, you doomed us all!"

[@TheZeroNeonix]

Honest question, why was Jeff Goldblum in this movie? Was he brought in just so they could use his lines in the trailer?

[@ZaydinTTV]

More than likely.

[@TheGuardDuck]

Yes.

[@daltysmilth]

He had a day free.

[@rissarae3]

They really shouldn't have. His character right off the bat explains how keeping the dinosaurs around *is a bad idea* . In like the first 10 minutes I'm already on his side and find the protagonist's reasons really stupid and irresponsible. Not only to humans but the whole ecosystem. Now I just want the next movie to be Jeff Goldblum telling everyone "I told you so"

[@ZaydinTTV]

@@rissarae3Funny thing is that he has an overall bigger role in Jurassic World: Evolution compared to this.

[@astafford2901]

Even the T-Rex's roar sounds exhausted... :_( That's truly heartbreaking.

[@alexbenjaminlubbers]

She's 28 years old, Rexes only live to about 30. She's like 90 in human years.

[@itfigurescomics6704]

But...those roars are nearly the same as the others in the past...

[@TheRealRiptide01]

DVJFan no u

[@DarkEclipse23]

trex: “I’m a mother fucki-- aaahhh we’re still making these? I’m getting too old for this shit.... *just leaves*”

[@Multi-Guard]

She's a clone?........ "Watch out for those wrist rockets!"

[@apocalypse8818]

*Plays Jurassic Park Theme*

[@justanasshole588]

Micah Wolf just like the simulations

[@kindleyfever258]

Is this a Battlefront reference?

[@ellnats]

you wish, actually so do i that would give it points up from me

[@calebkopp7636]

That was such a deep pull into my childhood.

[@Shadow62x]

Nah, I knew she was a clone when she first sat on the bed and the grandfather was telling her she looked exactly like her mom. My first thought was... yeah, dinosaur cloning has been reused multiple times. What's next? Right, human cloning.

[@truthwooph4083]

Is she legal that's the real question 😅

[@Shadow62x]

@@truthwooph4083 I'm not sure where you are coming from with that, but... I guess it would depend if clones are human or not?

[@minnesotanfreedomist3147]

@@truthwooph4083 Depends. Is it an anime? Then Yes. Real life probably not.

[@minnesotanfreedomist3147]

@@Shadow62x Once you’ve watched enough hentai questions like this just come up regularly.

[@truthwooph4083]

@@minnesotanfreedomist3147 I feel ya man, I probably should of been more clear, the punchline of the joke was more about the legal system and all that fighting and drama a situation like this would cause in real life You'd assume the same laws that already apply too humans would also apply to clones... But knowing humanity the way I do, it would end up in a huge political nightmare with people bringing up all sorts of events that have nothing to do with the situation 🤣😂 Until it's in court ... Lawyer 1: the law should not apply to them they are not real people ! Lawyer 2: so you are saying we should be able too murder them at will ? Lawyer 1: Da economy !!!!! And so on 😭

[@KeatonKing]

Wait, Claire wasnt the owner of the park in the last movie, that indian guy in the helicopter was the owner.

[@somedudewhodraws9377]

his name was simon misarani he bought ingen after john hammond died

[@cristhianmlr]

@@somedudewhodraws9377 *Masrani.

[@louisduarte8763]

I think after he died in the helicopter crash, Claire became the default owner.

[@bolbyballinger]

Oh right, the guy whose computer technician had a poorly developed crush on him and who has had absolutely zero impact on the story? I refer to him as pointless asian dude.

[@Dierbolical]

another one of nostalgia critics many fuck ups

[@BagazZ123]

Oh... the t rex and a raptor were in there... yeah that was the right choice little girl. The right choice.

[@OppressiveMaul]

Blue was already out there

[@OppressiveMaul]

But yeh there was a T-Rex, a Carnotaurus, and an Allosaurus

[@devilmikey00]

@Malcolm Harris I mean until the army/cops bring out a bazooka and end these things lives. This is 2018 and a few dozen large dinosaurs are in no way an existential threat to humanity.

[@AS-zh9iq]

@@devilmikey00 when will everyone release nostalgia critic is just awful He says tom and Jerry never talks tom talked in three cartoons Jerry only talked in one For all his the horrible CGI effect and animation that's clearly what he is doing And worst of all in Jason vs Freddy review it us pickachu head cut of while ash was crying and he made joke about it 😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩😤😤😤😤😤😤😤😤😤😤😤😤😤😤😤😤😤😤😤😤😤😤😤😤😤😤😤😤😤😤😤😤😤😤😤😤😤😤😤😤😤😤😤😤😤😤😤😤😤😤😤😤😤😤😤😤😤😤😤😤😤😤😤😤😤😤😤😤😤😤😤😤😤😤😤😾😾😾😾😾😾😾😾😾😾😾😾😾😾😾😾😾😾😾😾😾😾😾😾😾😾😾😾😾😾😾😾😾😾😾😾😾😾😾💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔👎👎👎👎👎👎👎👎👎👎👎👎👎👎👎👎👎👎👎👎👎👎👎!!!!!!!!

[@rminkof]

@@ninjahombrepalito1721 Not in the short term. But, well, try googling "invasive species" & "Australia"

[@knifetoucher]

You missed the actual dumbest part of the movie, the part where they demonstrates how the endo raptor works...by pointing a laser pointer rifle at the target they want the raptor to kill... Like..why not just point an actual rifle and kill the target with bullets?

[@blondbraid7986]

Exactly, the whole idea of weaponizing dinosaurs is stupid. We've already had war elephants in real life for that purpose, and they got phased out once tanks were invented because relying on large animals who easily get startled and go berserk is a terrible idea.

[@milhy6567]

Just drop some caltrops or fire, animals are terrible in war because they can easily be scared off.

[@xBloodxFangx]

Zeroni not the belgian malinois. Those dogs are fearless and run strait into the gun fire and explosions to help out. They even jump from helicopters. It’s thought a mal was the reason they found bin laden. Now imagine that dog was a raptor, who you could just clone again if it died.

[@theguyintheworks8838]

Because that is not as fun :(

[@AcenMasterX]

How it should've ended already used that joke, and these comedy-analysis channels try not to cover the same ground as each other.

[@TheAnchorArmsChad]

The thumbnail screams: *"I'LL SMASH IT WITH A HAMMER!"*

[@joyunicycle]

IT'S BRILLIANT BRILLIANT I TELL YOU!

[@treyowen9213]

Or to save on postage, I'll just poison him with this. *i say grinning holding up a vial of unknown liquid*

[@Twinleaf_2623]

I'll turn him into a flea. A harmless little flea. And then, I'll put that flea, and then I'll put that box in another box and then I'll mail that box to myself and when it arrives... *AHAHAHAHA!!! I'LL SMASH WITH A HAMMER!!!* It's brilliant, brilliant I tell you! Genius I say!

[@animalanomalies1601]

ohhhh feel the power.

[@willigagbob8243]

Mallet.

[@scytheseven9173]

Oh no! If we don't save the dinosaurs, then they'll go extinct, and we know from Jurassic Park that that means they can never be brought back to life again!

[@matthewcollins4773]

Exactly. The biggest and dumbest plot hole in the film. All you need is DNA samples; even if all the dinosaurs die *you can remake them like you did last time.*

[@jeremypedersen6894]

@@matthewcollins4773 also they ARENT BEING BURNED. So... They can die and you can get more

[@scytheseven9173]

No, but my pet doesn't try to eat me most of the time.

[@scytheseven9173]

I'm not saying "kill all the dinosaurs." I'm saying "don't save the dinosaurs because any attempt to do so (as shown by the movie) will be a fiasco and you can bring them back anyway because that's literally the premise of the entire franchise."

[@scytheseven9173]

Dying by volcanic eruption is neither slow nor painful, especially compared to the brutal fights against humans and other dinosaurs that tend to kill them in both this and previous movies. Saving them is not worth the many human lives that were lost in the endeavor, especially when extinction is not at all an issue in this setting. It was stupid to put them on top of a volcano in the first place, but that stupidity does not justify the additional stupidity of a dangerous mission to rescue them. Obviously, if it were possible in a Jurassic Park movie to handle the dinosaurs safely and humanely, that would be the ideal choice, but the movies have shown time and time again that doing so is impossible and will always lead to massive casualties, both human and dinosaur. The entire point of the movies is that humans interfering with dinosaurs, including their resurrection, is a bad idea.

[@xBluegamerx]

To be fair on the stupid IndoRaptor they did say it was a crazy unfinished prototype they just planned on getting rid of.

[@Ananasbringer]

The "Is this a gang sign? Are you in a gang?" joke always makes my day :D Also, there should never be more than one premature celebration scene in a movie! Fun fact: There are actually studies about using captive tiger blood on domestic cats, for the sake of saving some endangered felidae species. Apparently the compability was around 3/10 samples or something along the lines.

[@laracelsmith]

Fun fact: the mechanics of the face cloaking hat were actually stolen (then inverted) from Phineas and Ferb. Dr Doofenschmirtz, for example, was always unable to recognize his nemesis Perry the Platipus as soon as he removed his hat.

[@ngairebarr1708]

Perry the platypus!!

[@peterelliott6460]

14:26 who else noticed Chris Pratt's hand flicking some lava with absolutely no harm done to it?

[@idealab5289]

I noticed that. Considering it would cause incredible damage and pain to his hand, I just assumed that a bubble of lava just popped where his hand was

[@Openreality]

Or the fact that he didn't die from the toxic fumes of being that close top lava or the fact that a little girl doomed mankind because of her own existential crisis.

[@idealab5289]

Or that he was completely engulfed in volcanic ash over 1000 degrees

[@Mr_Original]

Thanks for pointing that out, I wasn't sure if that was just me or if that actually happened. XD

[@NoESanity]

i'm guessing ya'll have never watched any of actual people playing with actual lava videos... all over fucking youtube.

[@nickyliu8762]

Just wanna point out: the guys that got devoured after the beasts got released were also alive, like her. Some of them maybe had family, while the monsters will die off anyway after killing many more families, because they won't find a female, or another beast to fertilize the eggs.

[@FrancisR420]

And your point is? humans kill a lot of stuff too I mean just from your example that little girl killed Humanity probably Also all the dinosaurs also had family you just didn't care about them.

[@nykerianash1590]

Maui Randall So this already shows how sick you are. So because some humans kill that means that those people deserved to die. For all you know some of them could hav been vegetarian. The fact that you think their lives are less than a creature (dinosaurs) that cannot try to see from the perspective of another species , that has no empathy, etc. Says a lot about you. We some people kill they feel guilt, some change, some try to do good, when a Dino kills it woo the give you a second thought. Also, they are clones and they only made many so I don’t know think they have families.

[@ryuudraco592]

@@nykerianash1590 here's the rundown, yes they are clones, yes they will eventually die, but a T-Rex can eat 500 pounds of flesh and bone in one bite, a velociraptor is believed to be as fast as a cheetah, guess what I might like non human animals more then humans but I still say let those over grown geckos die, I don't care if your a clone like them mazy your a human that doesn't kill to survive and can easily be taught things, dinosaurs are wild animals that went extinct millions of years ago and they shouldn't have been brought back to life cuz as you can see we can't control them

[@alexbenjaminlubbers]

@@ryuudraco592 All of you are missing the point of Maisie releasing the dinosaurs. She is supposed to represent their side of the argument to the audience. Yes, they are clones, yes many of them are carnivorous, but they have a right to live regardless. Her "they're alive like me" argument gets so much hate. I could find a disabled pitbull at a shelter and take it home. Someone would surely say how "dangerous pitbulls are, why did you adopt that thing???" Why? Because, I have a disability just like this 3-legged pitbull. I have compassion for a seemingly dangerous creature because I share a trait with it. Understand now?

[@ryuudraco592]

@@alexbenjaminlubbers except 1 the pitbulls are no more dangerous then any other breed of dogs it's just that pitbulls are conceived as dangerous because they had a bad owner who abused them and media uses them as the go to junkyard dog. 2 dogs are trainable and have been bread to be much more controllable than their wolf ancestors. Dinosaurs or at least in Jurassic Park movies can not be trained as quickly as a dog and since their related to lizards they can't be trained like a dog since their brains can only process food, mate, and fight/run. where a dog and humans like Maisie can learn good behavior from bad behavior

[@MrThankman360]

“It’s not as safe as the bed sheets but it’ll have to do.” LOL. I lost it at this.

[@cjhs2006]

I Didn’t Know Detective Pikachu’s Partner Was in This Movie

[@AxeMan562]

And the fact that we all enjoy his character in Detective Pikachu and despise his character in Fallen Kingdom shows you the destructive power of shitty writing.

[@AnimatedTerror]

@@AxeMan562 honestly he wasn’t too great in detective pikachu either. But he was leagues better in that film because he was actually a character with dialogue and motives and not... well he wasn’t skittish nerd #673.

[@emerald773sstudio2]

@@AxeMan562 Here's the worst part, he's coming back for the final film.

[@CaptainCat101]

Not a good first impression, but at least he significantly improved (I think)

[@patrickgogan3517]

@@emerald773sstudio2 apparently Dominion isnt going to be the last one

[@ejoshcoron]

I can't give Rob enough credit for his John Hammond 😂😂👍👍

[@glyphsaiyan858]

The fact that it's a terrible one? Yeah, hit the nail on that oversized head.

[@abdizur8765]

Spare no expense

[@SingingWhileDrunk]

@שחר א. That might be true but fuck you anyway

[@mariobeaupre1626]

@שחר א. you do know everyone does their best on this show right? Everyone works hard to give us a good time and you just shit at their face because there's ONE member of the team you really love At least acknowledge that they're doing their best, geez

[@mariobeaupre1626]

@@glyphsaiyan858 what an unnecessary comment

[@xonxt]

And not even a single one "I'm a dinosaur" from Rob? I'm disappoint

[@Plamspam07]

Walter killed dinosaur!rob.

[@Chris_Cross-pf3dp]

Anyone remember in JP3 that kid said doctor Malcolm was high on himself? Well to me the Fallen Kingdom was indeed high on itself!

[@floricel_112]

to me Malcolm was the only character in the series that ever made sense

[@dweebdraws]

Gotta be honest..... The thing about this movie that REALLY pissed me off was the FALSE ADVERTISING!!! Like, in ALL of the trailers, they showed the T-Rex and a lion having a roaring contest. I'm like "holy shit, that's awesome! I have to find out for myself how things got to that point!" Only for it to be lazily slapped into the last five minutes of the movie! Im pretty sure they made the trailer and then just realized that they couldn't release it without actually having a movie to go with it.

[@turkeygod6665]

nah

[@suchomimus9460]

D. weeb You never saw the first two official trailers, did you?

[@Williamohightower]

i liked this movie but it did feel like a place holder

[@GoGojiraGo]

It was a quick clip as part of the "dinosaurs are now in the world" thing in the end.

[@keyanstoney1742]

D. weeb it still happened so I don’t know what your complaining about

[@darthbradmedia8929]

24:50 Isn’t sad that I care more about Hammond’s cane breaking than Lockwood dying! Still oh no not the cane!! 😢

[@mariobeaupre1626]

Yeah, that cane was really fucking dope even in the first movie

[@matthewmspace]

That thumbnail is pure gold. Will watch this after I get back from work tonight. Just came in to say that real quick.

[@OfficerFriendly2006]

Matthew Miller you work at this hour!?!?!? What do you do?

[@cardflavor8486]

No one gives a fuck go put in your time at your part time job and stop reaching bitch

[@SangoSon12]

That thumbnail is pretty good. It made me want to watch it as soon as I did. I'm not even into the Jurassic franchise. I just knew it was going to be good... and it was.

[@frankf684]

I watched it at work.

[@lootcat1230]

I'm surprised that nothing was said about the fact that Owen shot 2 holes into the sphere they were in under water with a 9 mm pistol, when Jimmy Fallon cameo in the first movie said "it can prevent a 50 caliber bullet".

[@AlJP286]

Ok, here's something that I have been meaning to say about this movie ever since I've seen it. 1. Why is this movie set 3 years after the 4th film? In 3 years this island would have had poachers, and rival business people from Biosyn trying to steal the dinosaurs. So how their dinosaurs still on the island. This should have been 6 months after Jurassic World, that would have been way more believable 2. Why does Wu need the Indominus Rex bone or Blue? He has the genetic code and realistically blood samples of both animals, before the park's closure. Just clone another Raptor and make it more motherly and compassionate. 3. The Clone thing. Now I know a lot of people think the twist is stupid. But I think what makes this twist stupid is that it undermines the entire dinosaur plot. If Ingen was able to clone an actual human being, they would be making billions from cloning body organs alone. Who needs the dinosaurs when we can grow a heart and an arm in less amount of time and with less amount of money.

[@christopherbennett5858]

Ah, the clone thing. It does undermine that, doesn't it? In fact, we do have a Jurassic Park movie with Human Cloning... The Island. It's not great but it's better than this. I think they did it because it was hinted at in the novels that Hammond was cloned after his death. It's pretty silly, really.

[@1224wolf]

and another thing. Why the hell is mankind doomed?? America has a military and a huge ton of weapons. Do the writers really think this dinosaures can survive even a month?? They would be dead faster then they could breed. Its stupid to think that a few dinosaures can be a threat to humans. So why is this ending seen as dramatic???

[@justafaniv1097]

I won't defend much of this movie, but as to point 3, I don't think it is ever implied that they can grow organs separate from a whole body. If you wanted to grow a new heart, you have to grow an entire clone person to maturity to get that heart. Though I'm not saying InGen isn't unethical enough to go all "My Sister's Keeper" on the whole venture, governments probably would prohibit such organ harvesting. Many already have bans on even attempting human cloning due to the ethical minefield of such a prospect, so the kid being a secret kinda makes sense.

[@Frankoman64]

@@justafaniv1097 We can already grow organs outside of a body in real life

[@ПавелПовх-з3у]

At least skull island knew what it was. This movie was inconsistent.

[@cranberryaftershave2228]

"Again, LITTERALLY Malcolm" I love that line and am sure that bit was made after he read the review's script.

[@danielclark241]

Dr. Wu has become the Revolver Ocelot of the Jurassic Park/World series.

[@albertschoise8091]

Daniel Clark the what?

[@larrychu6396]

Hahaha

[@cadethumann8605]

Too bad that he is nowhere near as half as cool as Revolver Ocelot.

[@maneoj46]

He was pulling the strings the whole time!

[@Sigismund697]

@@cadethumann8605 he only reembles him in the playing with all teams and none at all And to be honest Ocelot lost his charm after 2

[@TyTitan77]

"they're alive like me" *shoots her* *credits play* (THIS IS A JOKE)

[@phantomshadow4289]

We would all do the same thing, why have dinosaurs alive when they're just going to kill everyone!?

[@TyTitan77]

@@phantomshadow4289 well then we go dino hunting

[@TyTitan77]

@Philip Good but it gives no reason for her to release the Dinos that will kill other humans. Also THIS IS A JOKE. I watched the movie. It's just a freaking joke. I enjoyed the movie.

[@TyTitan77]

@Philip Good Even though she was 5 and found out she's a clone it still gives her no reason to free the Dinos because they are like her. She's allowing others to die

[@MegaDragonmark]

@Philip Good as well as other people feel strongly about this being the stupid part of the whole movie. i mean sure i love dinosaurs and would be heart broken that they would of died but apparently this is not an island house. this is actually on the mainline. as much as the money grubbing villain is stupid for taking the dinosaurs into the main land, it was just as stupid for someone to let a little girl that is currently having a existential crisis after finding out she is a clone press the release all the dinosaurs out onto the world button. i am not saying shoot her, i am saying secure her and offer the girl some therapy after words.

[@Fire_Summoner]

Jurassic World: Fallen to Copyrights- Nostalgia Critic.

[@LamirLakantry]

Girl runs from undoraptor. Owen: "It's okay. She's a clone. We can make more. She's even wearing a red shirt."

[@OnDavidsBrain]

Basically every time Franklin opens his pie hole, ORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORA!!!!!!

[@johnangelotenorio]

Was going to comment this...

[@margarethmichelina5146]

And Franklin will be on Detective Pikachu starring Ryan Reynolds

[@Ludee27]

MUDA MUDA MUDA MUDA MUDA MUDA MUDA MUDA MUDA MUDA MUDA MUDA MUDA MUDA MUDA MUDA MUDA MUDA MUDA MUDA MUDA MUDA MUDA MUDA MUDA MUDA MUDA MUDA MUDA MUDA MUDA MUDA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[@JokersPalace3384]

OnDavidsBrain I wanted to say this!

[@douglasrau5094]

When it comes to future Jurassic Park sequels at the box office, they don't require our assistance. They require our absence.

[@TheSteamLord]

When are you and rob gonna review the grinch? (2018 one)

[@ChrisNeufeldMusic]

If you’re talking about the one with Jim Carrey in it, it’s already reviewed.

[@smuglytherat]

When the chart says

[@TheSteamLord]

No the 2018 one

[@ChrisNeufeldMusic]

Oh, the new animated one? Maybe next Christmas.

[@TheSteamLord]

I meant a sibling rivalry or a Doug reviews

[@Kevbotomy]

"Did those sequels just puke up a hunger over Jeff Goldblum?" "Spared no expense" Made my morning :)

[@Asaylum117]

Oh yeah, this little girl is a genius. Let's UNLEASH an extinct species that half of them are carnivores that eat meat, including human beings which are babies, orphans, kids with parents, parents with their mothers and fathers who are also known as old people and let's not forget that these dinosaurs won't last very long, considering that we have the military forces ready to gun these things down and blow them up with rockets. .... That girl did NOT think this through did she? XD

[@asher8754]

I’d have don’t it sorry but the ranking is dinosaurs, current animals, people, plants, fungi, hipsters, anyone who thinks film is meant to be anything other than entertainment.

[@tylerwestbrook2392]

But we need dinosaurs just like we need air water and sunlight. We also need to get some Woolley mammoths dodos and saber tooth tigers up in this world 😉

[@eeveestar6826]

She's 9

[@Asaylum117]

EeveeStar 682 SO? No 9 year old would be dumb enough to release dangerous wild animals on the freaking streets.

[@eeveestar6826]

>9 year old >high stress situation >probably didn't think of the consequences

[@animationfan957]

Jurassic Park, one of the most iconic and epic movies ever. And now it’s turned into the ”Long Before Time” franchise.

[@olleselin]

Land

[@user-dr2yz8um3d]

But these dinos don’t talk

[@schattentaenzerin]

​@@user-dr2yz8um3d "Alan!" Sorry, couldn't resist 😅

[@chasehedges6775]

@@schattentaenzerin💯😂💯

[@JoeyfilmingTv]

One of my biggest questions in this film and the previous movies after the first film is...do the humans in these movies really deserve the levels of dinosaur related vengeance that they receive? I mean most of the people who die are just ordinary people killed so that the audience gets to have their big dumb monster moment (the first movie only kills four characters (five if you count the opening), and all of those were off-camera and never played up as these glorious or awesome moments outside of "clever girl." The deaths were all dramatic and mattered because they happened to named and well established characters. None of these clowns have anything to them and feel like either pieces of cardboard or cartoons so I find it so difficult to even think it is awesome or satisfying.) I for one don't really enjoy this unjustified level of gratuitous violence, and that's not because I'm against gore or violence in films either. I don't mind something like Evil Dead and its violence because it is either purposefully silly or serves some dramatic and tonal purpose, and I don't mind the murder of innocents in something like No Country for Old Men because I want to see Chigurh succeed. I don't have any desire to see the personality-less T-Rex or super lizard mutant monster whatever to succeed in their overly violent killings of randos. This film(the others too) makes it seem like "Oh yeah, all of the assholes of the U.S. are going to die now! Awesome right?" What about all of the old people, children, mentally ill, physically disabled, and homeless that are essentially going to be ground up into chum? Half of them wouldn't even understand what was happening to them, but would get killed because I guess the metabolism of reptiles is so impressive that they need to constantly eat small and scrawny little humans that run away and fight back, causing the dinosaurs to expend way more energy to actually kill them than they would receive. You ever wonder why sharks don't eat minnows? Same principle. Ever wonder why gators and crocs attack in short bursts and give up easily? Same principle, though it is also because reptiles have low stamina that shows itself in great bursts of action. Most of the time dinosaurs would be struggling to maintain their body temperature lest they die (another thing reptiles must do, either by alternating between the sun and the shade, or the sun and a body of water). I'm not saying these movies need to be animal planet, but it is at walking dead levels of "Oh nothing is happening, throw a dinosaur on screen and let them just kill some people who should know better."

[@SentientMeatloaf1]

I think you may be giving the creators of this movie too much credit. I find it unlikely that the dinosaur related deaths have anything to do with "punishing" the people involved, that would indicate a level of self-awareness and subtlety that simply doesn't exist in these movies. The high body count is much more likely the result of when an incompetent writer wants to raise the stakes for a sequel gets his hands on the script. If ten people died last time, then 20 need to die this time. But Mr. incompetent writer doesn't want to sacrifice the main characters or any of the supporting cast he spent all of five minutes crafting, nor does he want to introduce any new named characters in order to fill out the mandatory self-imposed death toll. So the killing is delegated to random civilians and incompetent soldiers to make things easier. You have to be sure the soldiers are totally and unequivocally oblivious and stupid though. Heaven knows if any of them knew how to use a rifle the entire "invincible monster" illusion (not to mention the plot) would evaporate.

[@colinmartin9797]

I enjoyed precisely one thing in this film. Chris Pratt method acting a man with all four limbs asleep trying to flop his away from the lava was fucking hilarious. Rest of the movie was traaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaash.

[@lonebattledroid4474]

Like the critic said it's so ridiculous and stupid I love making fun of it.

[@ashgreninja-flurriko2173]

Aside from that, you have to admit that it's stupid because lava doesn't work that way. If lava was ever that close to you when you're on the ground, you would be on fire already.

[@muskatDR]

@@ashgreninja-flurriko2173 If you imagine him trying to wriggle his way out of this shitty movie it makes more sense

[@ashgreninja-flurriko2173]

@@muskatDR That's more logical.

[@adaptorperish1322]

@@ashgreninja-flurriko2173 I was about to type a “Hahaaa! NOPE” comment, when Critic started pointing that out.

[@brittanyyates6527]

Yay it's Wednesday, time for Nostalgia critic 😎

[@thefantasticretroreviewer3941]

HUMP-DDAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAYY!

[@adj789]

This was one of the funniest reviews I've seen all year

[@thefantasticretroreviewer3941]

@Anson Hartzler Chill

[@spikeshadows5877]

Friday where we Australian NC Fans are! 🤘🏼😎🤘🏼

[@SlashinatorZ]

Wish hed stop pretending the channel awesome controversy never happened

[@averageguy1469]

Why would the girl save the dinosaurs when she spent the last few minutes running from one?

[@just-a-silly-goofy-guy]

The action sequences were superb, but overall a terrible plot

[@ChaseHukill]

Could they get any more cliché with Dinosaurs and a volcano?

[@antisora13]

Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom is a lot like Godzilla (2014) and The Last Jedi, in that I hated it so much that I sincerely wish death on everyone involved in its production.

[@islaydragons1563]

kremit the frog THANK YOU

[@dorfcrunklstein9462]

It was really fun to watch.

[@feralchangeling97]

Hi again.

[@scottieman2]

The first Jurassic Park is the best. Jurassic world wasn't bad.

[@cpenner7086]

thank you. also the first Jurassic park had similar flaws as all the other movies but since it came out first no cares XD

[@scottieman2]

At least the first one tried.

[@Hermitstatus]

The only memorable moments in Jurassic World were the loosing of the dinosaurs on the general public and the T-Rex/Velociraptor tag team match. I swear, I don't want to remember any other "characters" in that movie, they either never mattered and were axed with little fanfare (except for that secretary that was tasked with looking after those kids, God rest her soul) or were so irritatingly 2 dimensional that one cannot help but tap their feet impatiently waiting for more scenes with what really mattered.....dinosaurs.

[@scottieman2]

@@Hermitstatus yeppers

[@kenrickkahn]

I liked Jurassic World! I was shocked and saddened at the sequel.. They had something going with Jurassic World and they fucked it all up..

[@MythicSuns]

So....Star Wars: Episode III had a more accurate idea of how lava works than Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom?

[@-m.d.n-9019]

Lol. When a movie about space battles , extremely hot sticks who can use telekinesis has better knowledge about how physics work. You know there's a problem.

[@Telcontar86]

You are correct, absolutely 100% correct! Also, this movie has no idea what a pyroclastic flow is if only the people in Pompeii had known all they had to do was run away from the 1800 degree cloud of pure death

[@urielt1504]

@Biollante86 Great point! Pompeii's residents were not killed by lava, which is not particularly fast moving or even wide-ranging since an eruption blasts it horizontaly, rather by the pyroclastic flow. These idiots would have been grey death status before they could have ever escaped since they were so close to the eruption. Pompeii was a solid 10 km from the volcano and it was wiped clean within 24 hours; Mr and Ms generic are within a jogging distance. Not only do they misrepresent dinos in every way (lizards with no feathers rather than giant bird-like creatures, roaring like fucking tigers even though they have no Syrin, highly intelligent and social despite the fact they were, in reality, dumber than rocks with primitive and proportionally tiny brains...), now they also get into meteorology.

[@Eli62104]

"We're seconds away from this thing talking!" More like 18 years ahead(Alan)

[@StrunDoNhor]

Bad pacing aside, the scene of the Brachiosaurus dying in the volcanic fumes did tug a few heart strings for me. In an otherwise bombastic and fast-paced movie, it was a surprisingly dark and somber moment -- which was only magnified by the Brachiosaurus' role in the previous movies (especially the original Jurassic Park). It's just a shame the pacing couldn't do a better job of framing the scene's tragic vibe. Instead everything before and after is all, "Gotta go, gotta go, gotta go right now!"

[@mariobadia4553]

Too bad in the scene before that the MCs drove a magical truck that can jump upwards off a completely flat surfasce and somehow silently land on a boat where the bad guys somehow can't recognize the red headed cunt even though she's just wearing a hat.

[@Fi_Sci_]

StrunDoNhor I think the part where it did that pose was a little unnecessary, it should just vanished in the ashes, would’ve made me actually feel something more than “oh it’s doing that thing it did in the first movie...cool?”

[@mariobadia4553]

@@ninjahombrepalito1721 Bullshit. All it takes is too look at her face for a second and they'll instantly recognize her.

[@mariobadia4553]

@@ninjahombrepalito1721 It is a big deal because people acted like a magic anti gravity truck didn't just jumped on the boat. Don't even get me started on the mentally retarded 9 year old in this movie(yes my head canon is that she's mentally retarded from the cloning process).

[@Tabbimura]

I'm sure a lot o people will get trampled by the dinosaurs released by a clone girl. Have any feels for civilians?

[@AlexReynard]

I do not know why the cinnamon Toast Crunch bit made me laugh as much as it did. Hell, this whole intro was one of the funniest you've done in a while.

[@louisduarte8763]

My answer to their question is "sugar, that's why!"

[@HaohmaruHL]

AlexReynard I've never tasted it myself since I have to import it from usa to try but this joke does make me chuckle

[@AlfredoPuente8]

How is a football player twice as expensive as all dinosaurs on earth?

[@thestwinner680]

Simple: he's a 1960s' football player (he himself is a dinosaur) He's most expensive because how often do you see any of the other dinosaurs *play football!*

[@unclecreepy9202]

He’s just pointing out the terrible writing where all the dinos were sold for less money than just one footballer.

[@JanetStarChild]

Which football player? Are you referring to Cristiano Ronaldo?

[@silverblade357]

@@unclecreepy9202 Hell, they're being sold to bad dudes that treat dinosaurs like nukes or some kinda advanced weapon. They're wild animals! You can try to tame them, but I'd put my money on trained humans with guns that aren't held down by inept writing!

[@jurassic420]

@@silverblade357 yeah... but they're goddamn dinosaurs

[@ledestroyer22]

I was not a fan of the movie, but the Brachiosaurus dying scene made me cry. It was the first creature we ever saw and at the end it’s just an animal that wanted to live. The lack of dialogue also made it much more impactful. That was the best scene of the whole movie

[@elder-woodsilverstein7716]

The scene made me sad too. The Brachiosaurus is my favorite dinosaur.

[@Marvelfanatic3658]

Cringe.

[@ledestroyer22]

@@Marvelfanatic3658 stfu goofy, u like 12 years old commenting sum dumb shit like that

[@ledestroyer22]

@@Marvelfanatic3658 stfu, with a response like that ur definitely a 12 year old kid if not u got the intelligence of one

[@Legoartboy]

18:02 a normal platypus? Perry the platypus!!!!!!!

[@Calthir]

"Hahaaaaa, he's afraid of the T-Rex!" ....Implying he shouldn't be?

[@cartoonnetworkdisneyxdsupe6864]

Bryan Jackson Implying that “he’s afraid of the T-rex” is a horribly unfunny joke.

[@1000000man1]

He's not saying the guy shouldn't be. He's saying it's a Forced Joke. It's a shit character trait with No Pay Off. We Never see him up against the T-Rex. He should've been eaten by it.

[@anonymouspotato1082]

No but it was pointless since he never actually sees the T.rex.

[@arthas640]

I wouldnt be afraid, but I am already dead and I've got a few dragons on hand

[@houldenmelville5530]

@@1000000man1 He wasn't, then what was the point of that joke if you don't go for the obvious punchline! That's like having Bugs Bunny go to the woods and not antagonize Elmer!

[@thesuntitan]

Gotta say, jokes were on point, one of your best reviews in a while, guys. Also, MORE CAT

[@ApoLk_]

Doug is a genius, i -usually- don't watch videos with more than 20 minutes, but the script of his videos always catch me, the reviews are really fair and direct too.

[@adamgray1753]

I'll say, TheSunTitan. Man, Fallen World really sucked. I went to go see it in theaters and the best part of the movie was my popcorn and drink.

[@ericconnor9590]

But malcolm and Tamara were just barely in it

[@K.Gthealmighty]

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAha good one the jokes in this review good okay

[@arlwithac9285]

@@K.Gthealmighty They were

[@TreeckoJedi9]

When I saw this movie with my mom, neither of us had anything to say. We just left the theater in silence.

[@Never_heart]

Okay I can 100% believe Chris Prat is only knocked out by a dinosaur killing tranquilizer.

[@NeroCM]

not even that. he was only paralyzed. Also, he's apparently immune to heat damage and his Luck stat must be over 9000. (Yes, I'm using old memes and video-game's jokes. Sue me).

[@SuperReddragon90]

It was stated that the wrong dosage, to much, could potentially kill a dinosaur without even specifying how much because those thing have to be messaged to the animal. It could easily be believed that one dart would have minimal damage to a person.

[@koichidignitythief7429]

@@SuperReddragon90 It was still enough to almost immediately sedate Blue a fully grown 700lb dinosaur. Chris Pratt should've been dead.

[@SuperReddragon90]

@@koichidignitythief7429 the Raptors in the film only weight around 180. Try again.

[@koichidignitythief7429]

@@SuperReddragon90 They're about as big a a tiger or lion which weighs a hell alot more than the average adult man.

[@thomasgrindol9124]

I remember watching the Meg and being incredibly dumbfounded that they also had a character die trying to get a tooth. Is this becoming a thing now? Is this the new jumping the shark?

[@asher8754]

The guy in the meg to be fair just wanted to make sure the thing was dead

[@SilverPlayer2002]

This is one of the best thumbnails that stick to the true nature of the Nostalgia Critic...An angry, short temper, ranting, cussing, fourth wall breaking, critic who just wants you to see the flaws in every movie you love and full out destroy. So basically Adam Conover.

[@jamescallanan2443]

What?

[@ArsyaUtomo]

Which michaud are you related to?

[@JunkPhuJP]

“You will be the worst part of this movie...”

[@amateurishauthor2202]

When I saw the Auction scene it made no sense. Sure these dinos are better than what worker animals we have today, but anything a dino can do a machine can do. A machine you keep fueled, maintained, and only needs refueling when it runs out from usage. A dinosaur? Constantly fed, overworked and it can't do anything due to exhaustion, and chances are they'll eat far more than it takes to fuel a machine to do the same job. The only job I can imagine Dinos being used for is military, Raptors would make for better attack dogs but would need to be stealthier as part of the stealth of an attack dog is that people tend to write off dogs as just mutts! Please correct me if I'm wrong, but these dinosaurs wouldn't have been flying off the market like a loaf of fresh bread. Only the risk taking experimenters would be willing to auction a Dinosaur. The rest are there to see what this Dinosaur fiasco is all about. I'd be there, but I wouldn't buy anything.

[@badgerman4022]

Amateurish Author well some dinosaurs can be used for other things, and I do agree with the facts that a machine could do it but besides that the baryonyx could be used for fishing, carnotaurus could be a sheep wrangler,(ok I know your probably like 'it would just eat the sheep' but I'm talking abut if they were like properly trained) allos be used in illegal military business, stygimoloch(spelling could be incorrect please correct if wrong) could be for entertainment like bulls, raptor=military, triceratops can be used for pets and zoos(the same goes for gallimimus, parasaurolophus,ankylosaurus,sinoceratops) the apatosaurus is just their and the Trex is the same, the pteranodons could be delivery shit idk and compys, well were fucked they have no jobs but being pests.

[@badgerman4022]

Sorry didn't read it before sending, if there are any errors please just ignore them or correct me please

[@amateurishauthor2202]

@@badgerman4022 Oh right, Entertainment. You could always open a park and- we've seen what happens twice now. Good suggestion, but I don't see the benefits of these enormous primal beasts over what we have currently. Cattle can't be scared or it effects their quality, and having a Carno for wrangling cattle doesn't seem like a good idea. I don't know what it was like first getting dogs to herd cattle, but one issue is that dogs are typically smaller than humans and don't typically fight unless in packs. A Carno is a solitary hunter, chances are they'd just eat your cattle and stress them out. In paper having Dinosaurs around seems like a good idea, but the question is what industry could they improve? Military? sure, new weapons are being developed every day (look up Dino D-day) entertainment? sure, anything could be classified as entertainment, including as stars in movies, performing parlor tricks in a diner, racing. Etc. Dinos would also make good security, heck we use guard dogs to help in that department. For mining, agriculture, delivery (Carrier pigeons were a specific breed of pigeon that's long since gone extinct) no, I don't see it, at least not at first. if we had a Triceratops irl people would bang their heads together as to where a creature would fit in our industrial age of modern society, other than being preserved so they don't immediately die out/indirectly killing off the native wildlife. But this is just my opinion, maybe you see some benefit of having a Dino doing one of these jobs. But with the current cost of Dinos, no. It would have to be puzzled out, refined, then trickle down to the working class. Walmart's not going to use Diplo's to help stock their shelves immediately after they've been brought back from extinction, it would cost more than it would save by using ladders. Sorry for the wall of text XD

[@badgerman4022]

Amateurish Author I completely agree with you, I just think they decided to auction them off because the greedy rich fucks in the movie just wanted to brag about having a dinosaur and how there helping it(I'm guessing they would say that if the authorities arrived) I guess either military use or entertainment is all they could be for or being a pet. The carno thing was me just literally running out of ideas and spitting out what I could I know it would never work but would be enjoyable to watch.

[@badgerman4022]

Amateurish Author I'm going to try and give a Dino bank(I guess you could call it that) for what they could be used for in a more simpler way(the names will be dumbed down to make it easier) Anky:military tanks or for carrying things(like a giant donkey/mule) Para:I don't know I guess since they are mostly peaceful you could put them in a zoo Trike:same as para but they could be a cool construction dinosaur to help with construction (but as you said that would be a waste of money) Gali:get them the fuck out of America Compys:the same too but there venom could be tested and used as maybe a weapon Carno:I don't know just a cool creature to have for a rich man I guess or they could be used for fighting(you know that illegal animal fighting stuff) Bary: back to fishing or they could be set as a rat control in the sewers(I know I'm stretching the ideas a bit but just roll with me ok) Also:exact same as carno Trex:the exact same as carno also cause it's a Trex Raptor:better hunting dog or could be tested on to see if they can make other animals as intelligent like dogs or cats Styg:animal fighting or if tamed could be a pet(dangerous but non the less a pet) Stego:is the same as para Pter:maybe delivery or military use or fishing Apato:same as para but would be a bit more difficult Sino: same as trike

[@juggernautk.captain5845]

To be fair, I doubt a 7-9ton bipedal animal would ever run at top speed on such a rainy day; especially for a 'chicken nugget'

[@asher8754]

Eh given that the island is very imbalanced in predator prey ratios I’d imagine food was scarce

[@narendramartosudarmo]

Also, she is like 30 years old now, which is like 60 in dinosaur years. But they did say that cloned animals have different lifespan than the real ones.

[@kindred3152]

The profile pic makes it better lol

[@dr.k8610]

I even said while watching the movie, YAY THEY PULLED A GHOSTBUSTERS 2. I do appreciate the Parks and Rec jokes.

[@FlickorTreatProductions]

Not to mention, they also pulled a Smokey and the Bandit 2. The same relationship problem happened in that sequel too.

[@suchomimus9460]

Boss Man Spielberg and Crichton planned to make this a 6 movie franchise.

[@GamePlayMetal]

@@suchomimus9460 And? That's irrelevant. This movie is still a steaming pile of dogshit.

[@suchomimus9460]

GamePlayMetal You know, it’s amazing. You are one hundred percent wrong. I mean, nothing you said was right.

[@dr.k8610]

S.P.E.W I recognize that quote, but I don’t remember from where

[@Professorgutierrez]

This film: Maisie is a clone. Dominion: She’s not a clone, her mother had her asexually. WHICH ONE IS IT?!

[@johnathanholmes1297]

Writers; Whichever we decided.

[@cjhs2006]

Hey,Isn’t The Auctioneer The HYDRA Scientist That Worked For Red Skull in Captain America:The 1st Avenger?

[@ComedicStaffWriter]

Jodee Rebecca Davey yes he is and the Dinosaur guy who wanted teeth was Buffalo Bill

[@cjhs2006]

Jay Rocksteady ok,Thanks

[@Jack1994hoo]

THAT'S WHERE I'VE SEEN HIM. Thank you! That question has been in my mind ever since I watched that movie for the first timw

[@cjhs2006]

Jack1994hoo no Problem,Glad to Help

[@LeeLeeBellePBJLee]

Zola ;) He becomes the computer Zola brain... thing... in The Winter Soldier.

[@MartialKaiju98]

“That’s uh that’s a chaos theory.”

[@forsakenracc]

In my theater at the end when Clair is about to push the button someone shouted “Push the button!”

[@CronoXpono]

Lol!! I would pay to see that!

[@hernanhenriquez6778]

Hilarous

[@scarletpsychowolf3578]

Eye patch XD I'd push the button too

[@CrasherX2000]

*PRESS THE BUTTON* NOT YET!!!

[@keyanstoney1742]

Eye patch I want to see that

[@thesmellofadventure5370]

Best Nostalgia Critic episodes: 1: Temple of Doom (I love every single thing! It’s hilarious!) 2: Batman and Robin (Doug’s descent into madness cracks me up) 3: Fallen Kingdom (Sarcasm and satire at its finest) 4: Spider-Man 3 (Destroys my least fav movie with silly ideas) 5: Search For Spock (Last time on the Nostalgia Critic video…) 6: Force Awakens (The entire thing feels like a 20 minute intro) 7: Out of the Shadows (An epic crossover of the ages!) 8: Nostalgic Commercials Saga (An important part of the channel) 9: Back To the Future (Covers some of my favorite movies) 10: Eight Crazy Nights (As a Jew, the intro gets me everytime) HM: Ghostbusters II, The Dark Knight, The Lorax

[@alexcastellini2672]

Sequels cannot be contained. Sequels break free. Crappy sequels uh, find a way.

[@autobotproductions1244]

welcome... to sequel world

[@alexcastellini2672]

@@autobotproductions1244 *JURASSIC PARK THEME INTENSIFIES*

[@ColinG943]

Actually, the sequels were contained.

[@mafiamace2209]

32:59 Was genuinely expecting the good ol' "It was a life!" clip from that Warriors of Virtue movie.

[@Chrono_Mitsurugi]

missed opportunity for sure.

[@Fubukio]

Chaplin The Cat makes everything better.

[@klimmr]

He's like Bill if he was a cat.

[@dvader518]

Chaplin the Cat vs. Lloyd the Cat

[@MrThankman360]

“I’ve got a whale of a tale for you.. he hee. That’ll be funny in a minute.”