“The Perfect Man" - 5 Traits Most Women Find Extremely Attractive

[@TheUpwardsSpiral]

Key notes: 1.) He is capable 2.) He is unreactive 3.) Women love him, he isn’t scared of rejection 4.) He is willing to die for what he believes in 5.) He sticks to the mission no matter what

[@user-wn3xj4kv1i]

#1. He's attractive

[@byronbaldwyn7330]

1. Being capable for the task at hand (very good). Additionally, make it look effortless. 2. Being unreactive (Don Draper). 3. Two Life Philosophies - I. Stoicism. II. The belief that he’ll be okay, no matter what happens to him. 4... Analyze video further (watch the video after 3:30 minutes).

[@randomvideosshideos8508]

He is agent and he has govt at his back

[@jdmnissan]

Ok boomer

[@j.i.s.l178]

That's a point of view 😉 ...

[@DBZMacky]

Step 1: Be Bond Step 2: JAMES Bond

[@gustafrindestal]

Step 3: ;)

[@SiimLand]

Shaken not stirred

[@RN-lz6fc]

Free Littlefinger. FTFY

[@Woody10719]

Thanks Goku!

[@juandelangel1418]

*slow clap*

[@RedShipsofSpainAgain]

3:57 "Bond doesn't waste energy on needless anger, frustration, threats, or worry. If he can change something to his benefit, he'll act, but otherwise he just moves on. This makes sure that he doesn't get stuck in his head reliving past mistakes or worrying about the future." This is an excellent point and is actually a trait of Stoic philosophy, which essentially says, "If something is in your control, then control it. But things that are outside of your control: don't worry about them, since you have no control over those things anyway." It's a remarkably helpful and practical philosophy. I'd never realized until watching this video that Bond does indeed embody the virtues of Stoicism. There's a scene in the movie Seven Years in Tibet, where the Dalai Lama tells Heinrich (Brad Pitt): "We have a saying in Tibet: If a problem can be solved there is no use worrying about it. If it can't be solved, worrying will do no good." That philosophy is very much embodied in James Bond's: if you can take action to solve a problem that's in your control, then you should take that action. But if the thing is out of your control, then don't waste energy worrying about it getting angry about it. So Buddhism, Stoicism, and James Bond: all have much in common.

[@witoldschwenke9492]

I live by that, started living by it in my late teens. It's not even about making progress or achieving goals. For me it started out being about ignoring the hardships of my life and the endless conflicts with my siblings and bullies. It's a very good attitude and allows me to be a good managerial type as well because it's so easy to move on when meeting obstacles in projects/tasks. Groups of people easily get stuck in cycles of uttering frustration or needles fruitless discussions.

[@boostergold3935]

Throw Christianity in there too

[@shanequigley7552]

Rejection is not failure, failure is giving up

[@kirilmihaylov1934]

@@thecarenthusiast8886 no....

[@kirilmihaylov1934]

@@thecarenthusiast8886 because you can't make her love you

[@thecarenthusiast8886]

@@kirilmihaylov1934 What's the harm in trying? 😭😭😭😭😭

[@kirilmihaylov1934]

@@thecarenthusiast8886 you can't make her love you....end of story.try and see for yourself

[@khurramqasir6815]

In other words "You only lose when you give up" (PM Imran Khan)

[@charleslung7984]

Maybe he just doesn’t spend his first 20years scrolling on KZbin.

[@MementoMori1001]

@@r3str1ctor25 consider it one

[@imanmukhlis5241]

Triggered

[@06livefast]

Niko Lahajner are you triggrrrd?

[@keaeyhechem]

Better late than never

[@faraz007]

Ouch! That hurts.

[@keithsoon3366]

He learns everything he can. When you truly know a lot of things, you will naturally be unreactive because you see through things objectively.

[@rrrwwwooo]

Never stop learning.

[@oscoe]

This is true. Experience develops objective approaches. And move towards the finer things in all aspects of life…..

[@bookswithbenjamin8902]

He does excercise, daily. They don't show it in the movies, but Ian Fleming's books are more detailed

[@SuperTregs]

Benjamin W. Roberts He also smokes 80 cigarettes a day, and drinks an unspeakable amount lol

[@DarinDmarkovic1]

We just assume that he does

[@Mikeplaysdbd]

What is the best book to begai with?

[@reinorekkakuski2312]

@@Mikeplaysdbd Of course you start with the first one, casino royale. Read them in order

[@Mikeplaysdbd]

@@reinorekkakuski2312 oh ok thanks

[@RealCoachLee]

He stays who he is no matter what the other person is doing. He doesn't feel the need to artificially draw attention to himself.

[@jmcenanly1]

Drawing attention to oneself can be lethal in Bond's line of work

[@abdisamadadam288]

The big problem is need of attention in our generation

[@bengough6772]

@@abdisamadadam288 infinitely magnified via the cheery picked images we show off through the social media lense

[@abdisamadadam288]

@@bengough6772 the cheery picked images we post in social media effect and hurts our personality and confidence

[@thecowboy9698]

@@abdisamadadam288 - I think it can be very accurately said that "needing" attention is a form of greed, and like all forms of greed, no matter how much you have it'll never be enough. I think the real secret is trying to be the very best man or woman that you can be, with how you take care of yourself physically, both your appearance and your health, and how you strive to conduct yourself, which I hope is in a positive and decent way, in how you treat others, and how you treat yourself.

[@joanofarcxxi]

As a woman, I can honestly say: a man who is confident and does not show he is fazed by rejection is immediately interesting, regardless of how he looks or what he make$. Because it takes strength of character to be able to get to that point.

[@keennickolas8575]

You know, that this is bull-sh*t? It is ONE particular skill that is trained! AND it is USED by so called pick-up artists! It tells you NOTHING about the person themselves!

[@fra2025]

Ahahahahahahahahahah

[@pr00009]

and you would spend the rest of your life trying to bend him to your ego. thats not love. its utter bs

[@joanofarcxxi]

@@pr00009 You are confused. Try to understand: the kind of man I am talking about doesn't bend. He doesn't have to. He is valuable and in demand because he's already worked on himself. He is an emotinally developed adult. Additionally, I don't need to bend anyone. I don't have to change anyone, that would be exhausting, unproductive, and too much work for me. I like to relax and enjoy life. If a man did not pass my standard requirements from the beginning, he is free to go, I wish him the best. I like my man the way he is, self actualized, mature, and high value. It's why I am attracted to him and love to be with him. I don't want projects. Does that make sense?

[@joanofarcxxi]

@@keennickolas8575 No. You need to have more experience to understand. Don't be angry. Just learn.

[@harveyts3]

Confidence and getting over things quickly with a sense of humor served me well when I was single and still does married.

[@hudibitekthesecond3235]

I think you meant "served me well"

[@harveyts3]

@@hudibitekthesecond3235 Indeed I did. Funny how I have not come back to this since making a comment, and it is a pretty well-liked comment. You are the first to correct me, and thank you. I hope this finds you well.

[@rogeliorodriguez8518]

Survive should be a common verb now. Yeah those cooking skills, have survived me well. Those street skills? Have survived me well too. Those French language course? Have survived me well too.

[@harveyts3]

@@rogeliorodriguez8518 The number of upvotes this has with that spelling is amazing to me. lol Good call out. I don't go back and look at comments often and for sure don't check the spelling apparently.

[@IAmTheSupremeEmperorOfFails]

@@harveyts3 I like how you didn’t get upset about it, you just said “oh yeah algud”

[@DanishSatkut]

"That's because you know what I can do with my little finger." DAMN!!!

[@bicerpbro55]

Danish Satkut what's that mean

[@antonyjp8341]

Danish Satkut Aru u thinking what i am thinking

[@samahamara8543]

Omg...

[@bicerpbro55]

Ohhhhhhhhhh

[@Lithrus_]

what dat finga do

[@ivanstayner8818]

I was diagnosed as a "high functioning" sociopath. And I have been told I kinda act like James bond. Since I struggle with feeling emotions. I tend to keep them bland, and too the point. I don't let outside forces change how I feel. I chose how I want to feel. Iv been told I'm very charming by multiple women in my life. That's why they hooked up with me. (And yes. The relationships I've had unfortunately ended quickly once they kinda figured out I didn't really care all that much for them) For some reason. Society likes emotionless men. But let me tell you this. Not being able to feel grief, anxiety, sadness, depression, empathy, along with a few others can and will get to you. You feel like you are missing a part of you. So instead of being emotionless, be emotional with control. Chose how to feel. Pick the level of reaction you want. Be...in...control.

[@davidcolon13]

Interesting. If you could be a sociopath or not, what would you choose? Also, what do you mean you were diagnosed as a sociopath? That is not possible; it’s not a medical term

[@ivanstayner8818]

@@davidcolon13 Diagnosed with ASPD. And IDK. Iv always been this way so it's hard to say if I would like being normal or not

[@davidcolon13]

@@ivanstayner8818 It’s really interesting to me that you’re a sociopath yet would be open to being normal. Thought anyone with ASPD would never want to be normal. Probably naive from me

[@noalane3626]

Dude get over yourself you wanna be sociopath can’t tell you how many wannabes like you I’ve met…you can’t handle a real one so just be quiet lmfao you’re a wannabe dude you’re nothing at all

[@dark_SDKR]

yea... except if you were like Bond you wouldn't seek validation on you tube comments.

[@MethenySco]

Reminds me of Marcus Aurelius: 'Begin each day by telling yourself: 'Today I shall be meeting with with interference, ingratitude, insolence, disloyalty, ill-will, and selfishness....Neither can I be angry with my brother or fall afoul of him...Bond is a stoic.

[@agittens]

Agreed

[@abhishekgururani6993]

great point, I was thinking about this the whole time!

[@antoniopetisce3417]

Exactly 💯

[@abbynormall207]

He has and shows confidence without being obnoxiously arrogance

[@gavinreid8351]

Confidence : knowing you are right. Arrogance: refusing to admit you are wrong.

[@---cr8nw]

@gavin Reid, confidence isn't knowing that you're right. Confidence is separating your value and identity from your correctness. A confident person can remain confident even when he is shown to be wrong because he knows that being wrong doesn't diminish his identity or his value.

[@j.i.s.l178]

@@gavinreid8351 Nothing to ajout You say all Nobody's is perfect... You perfect yours skills with Time...(experience)

[@MylesKillis]

That's the opposite of how the actual characters view him though lol

[@individualthoughts4427]

My motto is: "Become the man you need to be, not the the one you want to be." I'm just sharing my motto to help the one who need it.

[@MasteryOrder]

Respect to you.

[@piyushrawat42]

Do what's right, not what's expedient.

[@rashidgaylon1236]

the man you need but not the man you deserve

[@mikeandrews8272]

That is a great motto.

[@bielasp]

Wtf ? I think that both of these are the same, at least to me

[@jonnyb_good8769]

Bond doesn't waste energy on needless anger, frustration and emotion he just act and do what needs to be done - that was the most enthusiastic line I got my attention stucked on

[@matthewtaylor6533]

'acts and does'

[@harikrishnan-bi7kx]

Same in my case

[@matthewtaylor6533]

Acts and does stuck on

[@meacomefeyou]

Bonds a scripted fictitious character

[@hindenburg1596]

@@meacomefeyou Are you a genius or something

[@rashedulkabir6227]

James Bond version of Daniel Craig is confident and introverted.

[@psn.malgus]

You're correct, his personality type is ISTP (Introversion, Sensing, Thinking, Percieving) :-) Functions: Ti, Se, Ni, Fe.

[@rashedulkabir6227]

@@psn.malgus are you sure?

[@psn.malgus]

@@rashedulkabir6227 Daniel's Bond is @ the bottom of the list :-)

[@rashedulkabir6227]

@@psn.malgus Where?

[@sng3939]

He’s the best imo

[@Davran2742]

Another good message. It's good to remember that the character of James Bond had been through WW2, and would not have been a young man when Ian Fleming wrote Casino Royal in 1952. Bond was a compilation of various commandos Fleming knew during the war, and one human may never be able to be as skilled at everything the character is.

[@jakemay637]

I think Bond in the books began in his mid-thirties and doesn't age much.

[@Luxeley]

This is one of your more astute, articulate, ambitious and accurate observations about true strength. Well done.

[@Charismaoncommand]

~ Appreciate this! Glad you're digging it :-)

[@de8517]

Yep, keeping calm when someone is trying to bait you, harass, etc. I noticed those scenes too when James Bond is not reacting but keeping cool. It's extremely hard to do, not react. Your video is refreshing.

[@magyver7890]

Yes I agree

[@justinz9225]

To be fair, he was terrible at parkour. He was just running and jumping and falling. The entire point of that scene was to demonstrate what a wrecking ball of an athlete he is, compared to the finesse and agility of his opponent. The beauty of James Bond is that he IS the embodiment of masculinity. All the positives and negatives thereof. He's a womanizer, but it always bites him in the butt when he's left betrayed and unsatisfied and alone. He's strong but too insensitive to others. He's wise but untrusting. It's why men are drawn to the series. It's everything they want to be as men, while also being a caution against the challenges that often come with masculinity. This is why a female bond will never make sense or draw a crowd.

[@TheGeorgeD13]

They're not making a female bond, though. Just a female 007 when Bond retires. She recruits him for a mission and then after that, Craig goes off into the sunset. Next bond will still be a dude. Bond is a dude. 007 can be any gender or race. They're not necessarily the same thing.

[@intelcom4964]

Loooool

[@kungfuman82]

@@TheGeorgeD13 Ian Fleming would disagree.

[@TheGeorgeD13]

@@kungfuman82 Well, he's too dead to say anything about it, so who cares what he thinks? The franchise right now still thinks Bond is a guy and will always be a guy. 007 can change. It's the BOND Franchise, NOT the 007 franchise.

[@TheGeorgeD13]

​@@notlNSIGHT Casino Royale, Goldeneye, and Skyfall make a weirdly good trilogy to watch even though the middle part in this just now made up trilogy has a completely different Bond.

[@countermove4909]

Regretting past mistakes and worrying about the future instead of living in the present. So often done but rarely discussed. This vid hit it on the head with that one!

[@Boros777]

The 3rd point always reminds me of the saying "Confidence isn't being sure they say yes, but being able to deal with the no". Great video!

[@joshblanchard3719]

Confidence is not giving a %$#@.

[@parkerdodson3350]

I love Daniel Craig's Bond. He is the only "rough" Bond of them all. The rest are very clean cut, always in shape, and always suave. And there's nothing wrong with that, but Craig's Bond is sort of the everyman's Bond. We all see a little bit of ourselves in him. We deal with personal issues like bad relationships, health (I think Bond fails his physical test in Skyfall), and loneliness. But he stands resilient as we all try to do.

[@aikonoklas]

Parker Dodson yes, exactly. Glad craig fits perfectly in this bond.

[@meenakavali7378]

No that just takes away what makes James Bond James Bond. Craig’s not as charismatic in my opinion

[@ThorstenWieking]

While I do enjoy Craigs Bond, it is the clean cut, suave, well educated and elegant man that started my fascination with him. Just as I prefer Remington Steele to Rick Simon. But at the same time in the real life, I prefer Jeans, Leatherman and sneakers over a suit.

[@meenakavali7378]

ThorstenWieking thankyou

[@thefruitdealer4970]

You are objectively wrong though, Timothy Dalton did the "rough" bond 20 years earlier, and 10 times better than Daniel Craig. But Daniel Craig timed it better, as the audience wasnt really ready for a darker, more serious Bond in 1987

[@subutaynoyan5372]

Bond's usually depicted as someone either in his late 30's, or 40's and 50's He's an ex commander of British navy, someone who's read at Oxford at some time. Thus he had a lot of time in creating a lot of ambigious abilities. And also he's a bit of an omage to WW2 era blue blooded aristocratic army officials who also have a very rough, masculine physical men whilst being a very intellectual, educated and sophisticated fellow. And also, his success at showing prowess usually comes through his sheer will to never relent or yield. Craig's Bond is the most obvious of that, James Bond has that British stubbornness to not let go. And if his ''skills'' won't avail him, he usually finds some smart way to get results.

[@AhmedAbughadeer]

That's exactly what I had in mind two minutes into the video. And the only reason I viewed the comments, to find your comment. I wouldn't have expressed it better than you did. Well done.

[@enderwiggin8947]

In Ian Fleming’s books, Bond was a good golfer, loved scuba diving, was taught to ski as a boy by his stepfather, and trained in small arms and personal combat for hours between cases of which he had maybe, at the most, one every two years. He also read a lot. Reports on all sorts of things. Oh! He was also an excellent card player. In casino Royal, M said that Bond had been sent to work for months with a famous card “mechanic” Bond said it was agony. Point is, the books are basically better. And that’s saying something because I love the films!

[@mercenaryknight5419]

They are especially better than more than half the films.

[@calebfuller4713]

I'm a big fan of Fleming's novels. One of the best writers of the 20th century, IMHO. But I will say, I'm pretty sure in the novels it mentions Bond getting a field assignment about twice a year, not every two years. Of course, they're not all movie (or even book) worthy assignments, I think a lot would be taking out minor enemy agents or some form of field recon. But yes, between assignments, even James Bond has to work at a desk, doing paperwork and what I guess today would be called "data science", sifting through endless reports and bits of intelligence and trying to make sense of them.

[@brianjetton6912]

The bit about not getting stuck in our own heads, worrying about the past or future, is a major tenet of stoicism. Much of our worry is built up in our imagination. So much energy is spent thinking about what others think. It took me years to get that point where "I don't care," but it feels good being in control when others are losing their minds...

[@mogullnstinct575]

Bond is so fluid. Like Bruce Lee said “Be like water my friends.” Bond is so focused on his goal he doesn’t care about anything else. That is why he is so successful as well. He keeps one goal in mind at a time and goes at it 100% he is calculated and cool about it as well.

[@ElEternoPoetaLuis]

Daniel Craig is my favorite James Bond.

[@anonymoussvp3031]

ElEternoPoetaLuis i agree

[@JPCPSeto]

In my opinion though: Daniel Craig has portrayed one of the least attractive James Bonds. Partly he just doesn't have a lot of 'natural' charisma, like for example Pierce Brosnan did have. His version also jokes a lot less and he makes the jokes not work as well. Next, he doesn't have the captivating smile, the fine facial contours or nice hair. Pierce Brosnan was a slick, cool, charismatic James Bond. Daniel Craig is just a tough guy in a suit.

[@charlieshin9868]

Sean Connery says hi

[@Hardeneer]

Undoubtedly

[@MycroMatter]

@@JPCPSeto I like them both. Thier manly and cool in thier own way. Daniel broke the mold that a Bond doesn't have to be this fancy face doll. But a confident unreactive and very capable being.

[@JamesRDavenport]

I find being an authentic man is knowing who you truly are no matter what the rest of the world does, and acquiring wisdom. When you've become seasoned by experience and knowledge you automatically gain some confidence.

[@questor5189]

A superior demonstration of masculinity. Thank you Sir for this video. Bond exudes confidence when faced with challenges, and exhibits courage in the face of danger. These two attributes will take any man anywhere he wants to go....or is forced to go.

[@todd2962]

I can definitely relate to number 2. That’s something that I need to work on. Being able to quickly realize what you can and can’t control and being in complete control of your emotions, shows a lot maturity. Being in complete control of your mind and emotions is HUGE and is a big part of masculinity. Nobody has much respect for someone who loses control over small things that you cannot change. If you can’t control the bad thing that happened to you, have your brief moment of being pissed off for a second, throw that aside and handle it.

[@abhishekalfred3452]

It's a shame this generation doesn't know the importance of James bond

[@umont13]

Abhishek Alfred please tell me his importance

[@zach2352]

The reason is because most people don't understand the physiology

[@csyd22]

Purp purp

[@mr.t3520]

Thats because most people from this generation havent really seen any of james bond. The older generation buried those memories and is barely even now releasing some of their past lives, due to kids moving away from home for college, work, or a new family of our own.

[@lescamerounais8740]

exactly

[@WillKlein]

This breakdown is one of your best. I really appreciate your take on healthy masculinity, and your encouragement to reflect and adapt at the end.

[@89Husker]

I'm going through a divorce where my wife cheated on me with multiple people. Thank you for making this video. The ending especially was motivating for me to keep moving forward and to not let this define me.

[@thestrawberryshogun8373]

89Husker her loss use this experience for growth

[@89Husker]

TheStrawberryShogun thank you brother

[@sidharthkasi]

You'll become something truly great. Keep learning and growing.

[@nathancarranza9860]

Best wishes, stay strong and God bless you my friend.

[@tuomashirvonen8473]

I hope all the best for you man. For a guy like you theres plenty of fish in the sea.

[@OFFICIAL_VIDEO_AWARDS]

I can fix cars, survive in the wilderness, fly a plane, cook (did a professional chef course since I love cooking), do basic wiring, moderate carpentry, drive anything, captain a fishing boat, do your investments as I worked in super and investments until two weeks ago, freelanced as a journalist for a magazine, lived in three countries and 6 cities and I turned 30 last week. You can learn all of these things t just depends on how your life pans out.

[@kosarkaroki6515]

So,does capability brings you women ? Or its just the fact that u probably meet many people :P

[@OFFICIAL_VIDEO_AWARDS]

kosarka roki I'm not sure. I've always been shy and under-rate myself. Maybe, when I was 14 a much older woman started grooming me, I've had some girlfriends since but then again, I always saw myself as nothing special. That one time I had a 15/10 girl I felt like I was in out of my league Happily engaged now

[@IsrarTaj83]

I'm surprised that this comment hasn't already been pinned. it's impressive.

[@badcornflakes6374]

I've done these things. But then I woke up :(

[@arnabdas7019]

Dude you are awesome.

[@abdullahahmed3843]

Some young men who call themselves “alpha” today, can’t even change a car’s tyre😂👌

[@tytydonta3541]

@@alexjeon5863 bruh it's brits

[@CaptainAMAZINGGG]

@@alexjeon5863 your ignorance in your rude comment was hilarious, just sayin ;)

[@mrsalviboy94]

You went too far, these "alphas" can't check the tire PSI....

[@tytydonta3541]

@Typically Anthonium different 'part of speech', different meaning. different tire.

[@ReachingFullPotential]

You projecting g

[@CountessOfOle]

On that last point, I suspect him /not/ adhering to that resolution to wall himself up emotionally in the following movies is probably why he's one of the most popular incarnations of Bond among female audiences. Coldness and detachment is his immediate response to being betrayed, but in Skyfall, Silva gets behind that wall by hurting someone Bond was attached to before he built it. After that, Bond's wall comes crumbling down, because, if he can still be hurt in spite of it, what's the point of cutting himself off from human connection? So then, in Spectre, we find him once again opening himself up to someone, making himself vulnerable to being hurt, but this time, he isn't betrayed. The gamble pays off. Even in Quantum of Solace, the weakest of the bunch, set during the height of his emotional wall, he still can't wholly shake his innate desire for human contact. He stays distant and guarded, but the inner attachment is clearly still there. All of this serves to make him much more complicated and interesting than many previous portrayals of Bond. Women are much more drawn to that than to someone who always views women as little more than pawns to be manipulated or sacrificed to achieve an end.

[@DarinDmarkovic1]

Psychology says that woman like it when a man shows his vulnerability, this bond shows a more human side. This bond is also highly criticised than ever before.

[@soumyabhattacharjee6442]

Why pick bond when you could have done a better video with Johnny English?

[@QUARTERMASTEREMI6]

@soumya bhattacharjee _"Good morning, gentlemen! MI7 at your service."_

[@nothere941]

I propose a better Johnny... Johnny Bravo

[@johnnycalvino7490]

Could even have done a better video with Mr. Bean.

[@anthonyclarkson5209]

@@nothere941 Bravo is the best role model for men

[@CharlesCowart-x2w]

@@nothere941 Man I'm pretty!

[@bsn0730]

Omg "letting go" of stuff like anger at someone cutting me off driving is something I adopted before seeing this video and it helped me so much! I will not give someone the power to allow them to ruin my day. It's helped me have a lot more good days and even though I sometimes forget it, I come back to it regularly which helps me be more forgiving, more at peace, and somehow, more assertive.

[@ClearYourCanvas]

Duuuuuude! Yes! This is what I've been looking for. The inner work. The shadows within. Integrating all of what makes us up and looking at it critically for improvement. Your mission resonates with me. I'm gonna comb through all of your videos now. Thank you for this. This was quite insightful.

[@JamesBondsLibido]

Thank you, everyone!

[@marlo5424]

James Bond you better change that picture to sean

[@zizobriencavanough721]

Anytime my man's

[@invisibleman4827]

I'll be honest, ConC has a point about walling yourself up, it does make it hard to connect with friendships, relationships and romantic attachments. Having said that, I'm a bit like that myself, largely because of some childhood experiences of sexual harassment and assault. When I broke down because of it, I felt that people treated me with contempt, and that taught me the lesson "nobody cares if you're opening up, they'll treat you with disdain, especially if you're male" and I think that there's some truth to this. All too often, society has a two-faced attitude towards that emotional openness because when they start urging it as ConC does - not that ConC does this but some others do - they don't like those emotions and mock them, sneer at them, treat them with contempt which really takes away the incentive to emotional openness. I ended up closing off for fear of being hurt again, and not wanting people to pity me. I hated being in the position of losing control over my emotions and it's very rarely happened since, but it makes the relationship side of life much more difficult, because like Bond at the end of Casino Royale, you feel you can't trust or open up to anyone.

[@url4345]

Love the analysis here of masculinity and I couldn't agree more. In the real world, developing mastery isn't sexy, it's slow and difficult but personally rewarding, and being a 'man' means accepting you are vulnerable and that you can fail, be wrong, be hurt badly etc. And yet connecting with people and pursuing what you love sincerely anyway.

[@fightsmart6836]

Charisma on command! MAKE A BATMAN PERSONALITY BREAKDOWN!!

[@bicerpbro55]

Fight Smart this would be perfect

[@RandomGuitarGuy]

As much as I love Batman movies, series and comics, I gotta say that in 90% of the material he appears in, he is by far the least interesting character, personality-wise. He has a fantastic backstory and is a force that nature itself can barely contain. But full of personality? Not really. Would rather see a breakdown of why we all kinda love The Joker, despite the fact that he is a vile, destructive maniac!

[@fightsmart6836]

RandomGuitarGuy I agree on what you said, but instead of a personality breakdown, he could do a "Batman characteristics" video. Batman does not have the most liked personality overall since he is NEVER welcoming or has open body language. But he can do a " Why Batman is popular" or "Why we like Batman." From there he could give his characteristics from cartoons or movies such as "Patience, will, motivation, focus, showing no fear, e.t.c

[@davidmunoz8215]

Agree, the warmth part of his charisma may not be his main strenght, yet he has a high degree of authority and respect , similar to Tywin. The video could even focus on his detective/ deduction and preparation skills. Potentially,, a duality/ dichotomy video such as the Iron man/ Captain America one could be a good fit for him and Joker.

[@fightsmart6836]

David Muñoz Well said.

[@hemorrhagicintelligence]

I am 6ft3 tall, I am in excellent shape, strong and athletic (from martial arts), some say "good-looking", I am rather extroverted and I love to meet and mingle with people, I have a PhD in engineering and I own a biomechanics-related company, I have many useful or just weird skills like I can tailor clothes, cook rather elaborate dishes, do semi-decent painting, also with oil, acrylics and airbrush, I speak 5 languages fluently (with some slightly more "rare" ones like Finnish and Japanese among them) and more. Also across my professional landscape, I have a wide variety of skills from advanced applied math, to knowledge in medicine, software development and many more. I can confirm that even with all these "desirable traits" you often feel every bit as useless, lame, cringe and insignificant as anyone saying they are aspiring towards any of these traits because they think it will make them feel more confident.... It really just has to come from within.

[@Crambull]

Man, this has been an overdue breakdown.

[@kapitansiemka]

because?

[@ian74747]

kurist Because James Bond exists almost 40 years, and we have yet to discover how to become like James Bond.

[@relinaskye9620]

I think you should do a video on how Teachers can win over a classroom. Because that is not taught in any way, shape, or form in college. You either sink or swim.

[@xplays7992]

good idea

[@meganhartmann180]

Excellent video! Definitely one of the most inciteful and useful on this channel. I can definitely vouch for Lesson #4: pushing on in the face of adversity. It is one of the most attractive traits can a person can have. Also, I love the message here, that we should strive to emulate the strengths of our idols (realistically), and learn from their more negative traits.

[@meganhartmann180]

As a side note, Craig's James Bond does eventually learn to re-open his heart to love, which is one of the reasons why his character arc works so well in the latest movie. He gives a final goodbye to the woman who broke his heart and gives himself fully to his relationship with Madeline.

[@kevinericsongs]

a return to some good old fashioned ideals of masculinity wouldn't be a bad thing

[@chaosdweller]

Yeah I tried my hardest to do that yrs ago, now I've been forced in a metaphorical panda sanctuary getting my metaphorical rectal tempature regularly checked. In some sorta strange reality were the universe and my slave owners or owners negate or neglect the idea of the definition of discontent everyday, as if im the only inmate in a pink jumpsuit, surrounded by others with the traditional orange, would be a good ex i think? Lol. Yeah that's how I live now, ever since I was told I couldn't get what I wanted, and thats what I wanted to do.

[@alexogilvie9668]

The clickbait version of this is "why every man SECRETLY wants to be like James Bond" XD great vid as always

[@fun_at_work]

It is fascinating that you avoided the word "stoic" or "stoicism".

[@mgoVEX]

You just saved the James Bond franchise with this video. They would put this video in front of the next movie if they could, but probably reconstruct it with interviews.

[@samward2416]

My wife's boyfriend confiscated my nintendo switch until I watch this video.

[@FabioDerBali]

SJW SafeSpace what??

[@glorious_help]

SJW SafeSpace you pathetic looser

[@letsgoooo9200]

SJW SafeSpace 😂😂

[@Being__Ricky]

Wtf ???

[@ri3hegunpro271]

Wow

[@Rvxigga]

I am so happy Jason Paul was included in this video for the Parkour mention

[@PppPppPpp1]

- Capable (instant skill set without unsexy practice); - Unreactive to words, reactive to life threatens (If he can change he acts, otherwise, goes foward, what action can I make to shift this?) - Unflustered to women rejection, stays playful and charming, not pushy, not coward , not take personally, possible to reconsider - Willing to die from his ideals, stick to the mission.

[@colorsandcats]

Thoughtful social commentary and a dash of public philosophy plus charisma tips? Let's get some more of this kinda stuff! Keep it up Ben and Charlie!

[@EthanResendizOfficial]

A lot of people aren’t taking into account James Bond is 40-50 years old and has had his share of learning difficulties and issues the problem is when Young men try and be as wise and skillful as someone who is 10-30 years older than them.

[@dawsonowens7398]

I hope you're making the bank with this youtube channel, you're really good at what you do.

[@mattlewandowski73]

"can you imagine James Bond (practicing)" well yes I can... but he does it off camera... we mainly see him "on the job". I expect every bit of his free time is spent training, or with his nose in a book learning something new.

[@Geminias]

The mentality you're describing of not getting flustered/moving on and not wasting energy is usually attributed to the fact that he's a psychopath. MI6 recruited broken individuals to do the job(s) that normal people couldn't do.

[@AlaluofNibiru]

This was common traits of men when fathers were doing their job.

[@aguyfromnothere]

Before they were kicked out of their families by divorce laws and courts. Divorce rate of 50% not fathers fault especially when women file for divorce most often. And doesn't even consider out of wedlock birth where blame rests on both parents. Its a lot of stuff, no easy answers.

[@intosilence1773]

Touche

[@aplexas4206]

My father never returned from war ☹️

[@HelloThere...]

@@aplexas4206 my condolences. That must have been difficult if you were old enough to remember.

[@Slidewxyz]

Bonds an orphan

[@TacticsTechniquesandProcedures]

Never mistake a quiet man for a thoughtless man if you want to live.

[@pranavsinha9739]

Also a quiet man can be planning ur murder in his head

[@sguraya7223]

@Jedem Das Seine "Also things great men say". See the difference is in implementation.

[@mikeitani8189]

no one plans a murder out loud

[@sguraya7223]

@@mikeitani8189 lol nice

[@valideno9592]

@@mikeitani8189 I am extroverted in some MBTI personality scheme so I must plan murder with my family and friends.

[@spider-man500]

Pitch for next Bond reboot. Have a young James Bond(18-25) One who is still fresh and a little more naive, but mostly IMPERFECT, one who has to develop into the peak man he is.

[@choudhurysudip666]

Above all, James damn intelligent.. you'll see his enemies stronger, faster, more capable than him, but James overcomes them with shrewd quick thinking and sharp wits. That's his power. That's his true intellect. For example, re-watch the parkour scene. His opponent is way better, but James wins only with his quick brain. Remember, intelligence is sexy ;-) (Not new, it's always was and will be)

[@14AspenDrive]

He wins the parkour chase because of brute savagery as opposed to agility

[@audreyadams9498]

Sudip Choudhury not to mention its just a movie🤷🏻‍♀️

[@oapeleftherotisaftistisepo9540]

@@audreyadams9498 and?

[@rms-vp6hf]

The point ISN’T to shut down, or wall up. It’s to immediately focus on the mission even if it means rejecting “love”. Clearly you’ve never been in a gun fight to know there is a time when you MUST shut feelings down to focus ALL your energy on killing and surviving. THAT is Bond.

[@MrDroenix]

For those who aren't secret agents, what is the mission?

[@iammrbadguy9706]

I guess the mission are our believes.

[@later_daze_4080]

Ok tough guy

[@Aldo7899]

Even for the proverbial trained assasin, there is an appropriate time to put the killer instinct aside, if he doesn’t want to scare any potential friends or lovers away.

[@jeanalexandre1105]

In any relationship the person that cares the least is the winner. It's a sign of abundance

[@UmbrellaGent]

He's skilled at parkour?! I think you should rewatch the scene.

[@nicolafeo6139]

true! That was more about taking bad falls and still getting up XD

[@jazzx251]

... which was part of his military parachute training. I agree - that scene was about how someone UNSKILLED in parkour was determined to catch someone who had all the silky skills ... favourite moment: the parkour guy does a great move through an airvent .. Bond just crashes through a plaster wall, taking a shortcut. [that whole chase is surely the best chase in all of Bond]

[@MechaJutaro]

He's skilled at parkour?! I think you should rewatch the scene. Relieved to read that I wasn't alone in doing a double take there. Swell video otherwise

[@MrDavidKord]

He has a few pretty stellar rolls when he hits the ground. He's not a master at parkour, but he's good enough to make it work.

[@highestsettings]

To be fair, I think that makes him even more capable, he's not really attempted or practised it before, but he's able to keep up with someone who clearly has. That's being a capable person. If you learn a wide enough web of skills you can pull from each of them to adapt as you need. If there's one thing that people are good at, it's adapting existing knowledge to new purposes. That's how society even exists in the form it does today. Without that innate ability, we'd be fucked.

[@ravshars]

Thanks for this video. I am glad I found this video. Thanks man. I appreciate.

[@Charismaoncommand]

~ Our pleasure! Thanks for watching. :-)

[@brucewilliams7903]

Frfr this is a great guide to start on what im trying to do

[@ModernDatingMastery]

*These insights will definitely help anyone looking to improve themselves and attract the right partner!*

[@SuperDud3ed]

You become non-reactive by detaching emotionally. Bond's detachment to his betrayal is a masculine lifeline to action. If you want to be more masculine learn how and when to detach.

[@diogeneslantern18]

Everything you've described describes Stoicism.

[@lazytime9788]

" Real strength is not walling yourself up from getting hurt It is shown by opening yourself up to getting hurt because caring is worth it All the while knowing if the worst happens you have what it takes to pick yourself back up and move forward"

[@andrewgrey1551]

I think you missed Bond's most important quality: Everything he does, is for a purpose Bond always has a mission that he needs to complete, and whether he's winning poker games, or sleeping with women, the end goal is to complete the mission. If he were to get rejected by the girl or lose the big hand at poker, he would find another way to complete the mission. That's why he doesn't get flustered; he's not doing it for himself, per se, he's doing it for the sake of the mission. So in his mind, it doesn't matter if he'd lose that poker game, and it doesnt matter if he got slapped by the women for coming on to them. Those things were never his real purpose, they were just steps that couldve been taken to help complete his mission. If they didnt work out, he wouldve find another way to complete the mission and never given any of his other "L's" a second thought. It'd be like walking a path and coming to a fork in the road. Both ways still take you to where you want to go, if you start on 1 and find out that the path is blocked part way through, you just go back and use the other one. Once you get to your end destination by taking the 2nd way, you don't dwell on the fact that the first way didn't work out for you. Taking the first way was never the goal. The end destination was. I think that's how more people need to think when they go through their lives. Of course you can't have this purpose with every single thing you do, but if you look at the big picture, things will get easier. For example, if you're a guy out at a club with your friends, your end goal is to have a good time that night. If you approach a girl and she rejects you, it doesn't matter. Because the end goal is still to have fun, and if it doesn't happen with her, you just find another away. And if you end up having a fun time, you're not going to dwell on the fact that the girl said no.

[@debangshukantha6210]

Inder Grewal you killed it bro!!

[@joaoguerreiro52]

Inder Grewal I

[@AcaciaMovies]

Love this! So nice to see something that analyses the subtleties of masculinity without just branding the whole idea as toxic.

[@MuscleBandit]

Being numb and walled up and desensitized to the point whereby you no longer enjoy life just for the sense of strength and control is actually a reflection of not being able to cope when the worst happens. I needed that, thanks for the content.

[@owenwilson4533]

*standing in front of the cashier in a grocery store with no money* Me: what would James Bond do? *S N A P S T H E C A S H I E R S N E C K*

[@travel9304]

"Wow"

[@larryenroth9198]

Be OWEN and act sheepish.

[@donaldcook3112]

. . . Apologise first , then personally return all the goods from whence they came in the store . And then remember your wallet from that moment on - especially when shopping ... It is known as ' having good manners '. Your reply clearly shows that you have not being paying proper attention . . . all these decades .

[@theawesomeduo54]

he's no parkour expert, he just throws himself.

[@period5304]

Legions and legends and eventually lands on a haystack The Leap Of Faith

[@VinchenzoC]

And how fulfilling it would have been to be a real parkour expert.

[@A7xeno]

That makes him even more capable in my opinion. He doesn't know how to parkour and yet following a parkour expert like an absolute badass.

[@DevilFrog61]

People misunderstand “emotional numbness”....it’s not an internal numbness AT ALL. it’s strictly how you present yourself on the outside. There’s a time to cry and grieve, but that time is not in front of your team when you’re their leader. Men must not SHOW their emotions, but everyone needs an outlet. A balance is necessary, but nonetheless, there’s no doubt that being “vulnerable” and being incapable of deception (in terms of how you’re feeling) makes you significantly less powerful in life.

[@hifives2]

Also helps if you happen to drive a DB5

[@rhaegal5650]

Or any Aston Martin apart from the crazy racing specialised ones. They just ooze class

[@MrCool-qi7cy]

@@rhaegal5650 they oooze money.

[@aaaht3810]

"What he is, is what so many young men are kind of wishing they could become." That has been true since Dr. No was released in 1962.

[@chivalrousjack]

Charlie, your down to earth, approach, free of false bravado is what makes 1 of your videos superior to a thousand others attempting to accomplish the same thing. Don't let it go to your head.

[@fukinsginvain832]

A RICH LONER AND A WOMANIZER... YEAH I CAN LIVE WITH THAT.

[@WhySooSeriouslol]

“Perhaps you’re just out of practice” dang.. that is clever and smooth. I’ll have to remember that one

[@swapneil5549]

What does this line exactly mean

[@matsrudeng5355]

Swapneil Basutkar exactly what it says

[@johnbingaman3645]

@@swapneil5549 he said to her you're probably out of practice, meaning she probably cheated and has low Integrity from before, but with his charm she went along with him..

[@tacobellalugosi2527]

Yes fellas be like Bond . Never let a girl get u down or break your heart . Remember ur the prize . Most women fall for the bad boy . I’ve been with a few women some I really liked and some I liked for a week or two I know that is cold but I’ve learned that women don’t like nice guys they do however enjoy a good guy . The old sayin never be a door mat ! It go’s both ways . So fellas never put down ur guard. I’ve been a happy single guy for 20 plus years last time I fell in love the girl broke my heart . And after that I told myself I’d never fall for a woman again . And I’ve stuck to my guys . So stick with what they video teach u “they really do work “ with women and getting RESPECT from other guys “it works” this video is prolly the best he has done ! He really breaks it down ! So as a fellow guy I wish u good luck stick with what they videos being and u will go far ! ❤❤❤😊😊

[@sayakpal3459]

This is the only video I need to motivate myself. It has all the points like - - knowing how to do things, -not wasting your energy by reacting to useless insult about oneself, -be true to the work that you love doing, -and handle betrayals/break ups.

[@huncho2824]

“Knowing what truely matters and focusing on action above your ego, will make you a happier and more attractive person“ Word

[@anubiscreationsbyandy6288]

I always loved the stoicism of Bond's 'failures' by just going to the next thing 😊

[@blackpeter70]

1. No vomiting 2. No farting 3. No belching 4. Don't start a conversation with, "Did you see Big Bang Theory, last night? It was fuckin' top, mate!" 5. Don't ever go to the toilet It's that simple.

[@rattingcheese687]

But it was fuckin top mate

[@blackpeter70]

@@rattingcheese687 No.

[@rattingcheese687]

@@blackpeter70 lmao. Was a good comment on your part

[@shadowrealmcitizen1149]

Please do Vito or Mike Corleone (or both)

[@noelserrao9680]

Was thinking to say it

[@reyinsarcade]

Yes

[@maruetsane3616]

Bond is a stoic. Being masculine is not evil. Embrace it

[@halcyonp7724]

Do a character breakdown of Don Draper from Mad Men! Ben if you see this please do it.

[@levishhunted7593]

Cool

[@nejcrebolj2013]

Phoenix Rising who's Ben?

[@gustafrindestal]

Ben is Charlies companion on Charisma on Command. He made the video "4 steps to make people instantly like you" and also has his series on the paid version of Charisma University where he talks about work relationships. Really good content. Well reccommended!

[@ArchShockzPS3]

Yessss

[@smithsj227]

Yessss!!!! Don Draper is my man!

[@TheHelghast1138]

I've actually found walling off my emotions to be one of the most useful techniques I know how to do, especially since it has an on-off switch.

[@nealfry2230]

I've Always Admired my Accomplishments from Coast to Coast and Around The World.

[@nealfry2230]

" In God We Trust "

[@fejj12]

Nice video, guys. It was fun doing something a bit different, looking at the male ideal. In fact, the 2nd part on being nonreactive/unphased really intrigued me and I would love to see a follow-up talking head style video on it, really diving in to it to the topic to see how to best incorporate this charismatic quality into our everyday lives. Of course, there are times when it’s a really good thing to feel and show emotion, whether it’s passion, disappointment, or sadness, as showing raw emotion is a sign of courage, vulnerability and strength. And then in this video, we are seeing a man who is basically emotionless. So, I’m curious to see how we can balance the best of both worlds in our everyday lives. When to let a situation impact us emotionally and when to shoot for unphased nonreactivity, not to mention the tips to do so :-) . Thanks for all you do.

[@ian74747]

Jeff Dimon you mean "unfazed"?

[@highestsettings]

It's control of yourself and understanding what you can or can't control. If you can fix something, you do it. If you can't, you let it go. I think showing emotion and feeling emotion are different things. I would argue that emotion can be more powerful when you choose who you show it too. If you're always hiding your emotions and controlling yourself, then when you show someone how you really feel that's a real connection.

[@thesurvivorssanctuary6561]

Jeff Dimon Personally, I liked the description given, but disliked the images and example presented. I likened the description of unreactive to a healthy and powerful emotional metabolism. Basically, your emotions don't get clogged up, you can express yourself openly, as you desire, and then let everything go, 😎

[@aaros4407]

Let women chase you.

[@rjdiggs738]

Aaro Samuel You gonna be waiting for a long time or you'll die alone.

[@tv2109]

Rj Diggs agree 1000% man. That tactic may work if you're a drop dead gorgeous millionaire but not good advice for the average guy

[@Aldo7899]

Rj Diggs - it works a lot better than you might think in today’s society. Not to that extreme, of course. Letting women do some of the work does make you more marketable in a time when the vast majority of men slobber and cling to women from the get go.

[@MrCmon113]

Don't bother studying. Let the knowledge come to you!

[@theworldofwonder]

And you will wait and die alone. Women will not chase a man unless they need something and not for who you are as a person. That’s not what you wanna be chased for.

[@billysinge8977]

I liked Timothy Dalton’s version best, quite similar to Craig’s, but with a bit more conventional charm.

[@seekchristwithin4464]

dalton had 0 charm or charisma as bond. he was the worst.

[@BrettMaverick]

Make a character breakdown of Cullen Bohannon

[@wearevenom6464]

Brett Maverick you here bro

[@edwardkenway2652]

I think Brett you want to become like a James Bond

[@jessehenderson4922]

YES!!

[@basingold3651]

The part about rejection is fantastic, it reminds me of a story if you care to listen. Their was this really nice girl that worked at the counter of my local grocery store, she was really nice and we always had a chat everytime I went there. After a couple of months I wanted to ask her out, I felt the best way to do it was when everything was paid and I was about to leave I'd hand her a prewriten piece of paper with my number on while saying "If you are ever free, I'd like to get to know beter over a coffee or something (hand her the piece of paper) here's my number, or just throw out, but make sure it's a recycling bin if you do" I already had the rejection part of the rejection taken care of, if it was going to happen and with a little joke too. Yeah, she never called me and I can't shop there anymore.

[@milossavkovic6994]

You had us in first half xD

[@IsrarTaj83]

You need to go back there. She probably might have lost your number. Furthermore, just because she rejected you now, chances are that she might take you up on it later on.

[@bighennybihh8532]

Bruhhhh

[@AlexGreeneHypnotist]

Preach this from the mountain. This is the fifth video to come out this past few days alone which has shown the exact same thing to do to face rejection. In fact, in the last video I watched, the presenter recommended to the viewers to go out and actively seek to get rejected, just to practice your reaction - which, by the way, should be precisely what is described here. Spot on 100% right, all the way through. There have been two themes these past two weeks - train yourself to master being rejected gracefully, and Teslas coming a cropper when they meet swimming pools. Learn the above skill. Avoid ever going behind the wheel of a Tesla.

[@jefflo1320]

Be like James Bond, pork a widow right after her husband's funeral. Charisma huh.

[@SugaryPhoenixxx]

Maybe you are confusing charisma with integrity.

[@cosmotect]

Did you even listen to the narrator?

[@CountessOfOle]

But make sure you save her life from her husband's murderous coworkers first, or she won't give you the time of day.

[@nobleskywalker4639]

Sure her murdering husband that killed innocent people

[@DPickho1]

Makes me think of the scene about the hang glide accident from Wedding Crashers with Will Ferrell!