Chinese history is always insane

Chinese History wouldn't be complete without a Chinese emperor being insane. And Emperor Jiajing is maybe the craziest.
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Source:
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Palace_...
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jiajing...
Song name:
Authentic Chinese Classical Music - Ming Dynasty Court and Taoist music (Yanyue)
00:00 normal Chinese history
00:16 normal Chinese history video over
#chinese #china #history #memes

[@MasterofRoflness]

What other moments in Chinese history should I do next? www.patreon.com/masterofroflness Discord: discord.gg/g2A92uCz6N

[@quintonlim4275]

Opium Wars. Some of them had some wacky tactics too. The Qing thought strapping Monkeys on rockets were a legitimate naval strategy. Least crowded city. Kowloon Walled City. Actually not really relevant to China but animals in warfare could be an interesting topic cough cough Soviet anti tank dogs that killed more soviets in trenches then they did German tanks.

[@oofoof4875]

that thing where the guy tried to assassinate the emperor, but the emperor kept running around a pillar to evade the assassin

[@haoyanglee7111]

You should do Emperor Qianfei (Liu Ziye, 刘子业), absolute funni Among many other funni, he locked his uncles up and likened them to pigs, and some stuff he did: "Emperor Qianfei was very suspicious of his uncles-that they would rebel against him-so he gathered them in Jiankang and put them under house arrest in his palace. He often battered them and treated them as less than human. He, in particular, put Liu Yu the Prince of Xiangdong, Liu Xiuren (劉休仁) the Prince of Jian'an, and Liu Xiuyou (劉休祐) the Prince of Shanyang, all of whom were overweight, into cages and measured their weight as if weighing pigs. He referred to Liu Yu as the Prince of Pigs, Liu Xiuren as the Prince of Murderers, and Liu Xiuyou as the Prince of Thieves. Because another uncle, Liu Hui (劉褘) the Prince of Donghai, was considered obstinate and unintelligent, he referred to Liu Hui as the Prince of Donkeys. He often wanted to kill Liu Yu, Liu Xiuren, and Liu Xiuyiu, but each time Liu Xiuren flattered him and caused him to change his mind. In one particular incident, he tied Liu Yu up like how a pig would be tied up, and had him delivered to the kitchen, stating, "Today is pig-killing day." Liu Xiuren, however, stated, "This is not the pig-killing day." He angrily asked Liu Xiuren why that was the case, and Liu Xiuren stated, "After your son is born, then kill the pig and take out his entrails!" Emperor Qianfei liked Liu Xiuren's joke and did not kill Liu Yu." "Late in 464, Empress Dowager Wang grew extremely ill, and she summoned Emperor Qianfei to see her. He refused, stating that in sick people's rooms there would be ghosts, and he could not go. In anger, she told her servant girls: "Bring a sword and cut me open, to see how it is this animal came out of me!" She soon died." (Wikipedia) When he heard of a coup attempt (his supposed replacement was Liu Yigong), "Emperor Qianfei personally led the imperial guards to attack and kill Liu Yigong and his four sons. Liu Yuanjing and Yan, and their sons, were all killed as well. Emperor Qianfei cut off Liu Yigong's limbs, cut his abdomen open, and pulled out the entrails to be cut to pieces. He also gouged out Liu Yigong's eyes and put them in honey, calling them "pickled ghost eyes.""

[@jihadijohn9408]

@@oofoof4875oh when Qin Shi Huang basically kited against the assassin like an adc in league of legends?

[@504karson4]

Chinese : What's the problem in this?

[@BeaglzRok1]

Maybe the real immortality was the absolutely insane historical footprint you leave behind for eternity.

[@OhitsONnow]

So in a way--it worked

[@edwin7788]

People died when they forgotten, So yeah, he kinda immortal in a way

[@kerritarian4945]

immortal in stupidity, but immortal in a way

[@micosstar]

it works

[@baph0met]

That's the thing people say about Gilgamesh, he wanted to be immortal, well he kinda achieved that goal, the Epic of Gilgamesh is the oldest written story known to man. Poetic.

[@abnerdoon4902]

Dude makes the most unhinged of Roman emperors sound reasonable.

[@applesandgrapesfordinner4626]

Caligula has nothing on Chinese emperors

[@vitorpereira9515]

Elagabalus was a serial rapist.

[@jaif7327]

@@applesandgrapesfordinner4626i actually wonder if most of the stuff written about caligula is propaganda or not

[@digge2210]

​@@jaif7327it is

[@scarymonster5541]

​@@jaif7327hmm probably not propaganda

[@bernardocampos8363]

Most family friendly Chinese history moment

[@starmaker75]

Me studying east Asia history as a middle schooler: oh wow china is so cool with technological advancements, can't wait to study more when my reading skills improved. Me reading china history as an adult:.....Jesus when it rains, it pours in east Asia.

[@zetsu154]

History itself is very gruesome. I mean shit still happens

[@DANtheMANofSIPA]

@@zetsu154 It just seems like the far east, particularly China and Japan, has always been much more evil and brutal than any other society.

[@thegamiac9539]

@@starmaker75 this da reason china wants to erase history

[@user-xv1jr8gy3c]

Too many people and too much power.

[@Ealsante]

Lol, you guys. This is only maybe 30% of Jiajing's insanity, and Jiajing wasn't even the most insane of the Ming emperors. His predecessor Zhengde was quite the piece of work too: he wanted to personally command an army against the Mongols and his officials begged him not to go, so he said "Okay, I shan't go. But the Great General of the Armies, Zhu Shou, will go." Then he just changed into armour, called himself Zhu Shou, refused to be addressed as the emperor, and led the army anyway.

[@applesandgrapesfordinner4626]

I like this guy at least. I don't like THIS one though.

[@CannibaLouiST]

Cheng-te Emperor was exceptional. He even tried to turn the whole empire Muslim and completely ban pork, but he was "wise" enough to see that its outright impossible so he withdrew the decree. (Well actually the bureaucrats were freaking out when they saw the decree, plus the emperor never stopped eating pork)

[@jaif7327]

@@CannibaLouiSTwasn’t there a tang emperor who larped as a turk and even assumed a turk name? dude dressed in turkic clothing and lived in tents lmao

[@starmaker75]

Yeah the more you look into ming dynasty, the more you understand why there were a lot of hans that supported the Qing dynasty when it was getting power

[@applesandgrapesfordinner4626]

@@jaif7327 It's a good vibe tho

[@chasemcnab7610]

Yet you could still go thru 5 emperors like this before losing your “Mandate of Heaven” privileges

[@oatmealman1586]

Yeah. The way that mandate revoking stuff was decided was by floods or natural disasters that didn't happen on a cycle (like the unpredicted floods hitting China right now).

[@ZACKMAN2007]

​@@oatmealman1586I guess the CCPs mandate has run out

[@13gan]

The Mandate of Heaven doesn't really care about the personal flaws of the emperor, rather on how he manage his country. This mean that he can be a degenerate cannibal but as long as he manage the country well (like low corruption, efficient bureaucracy, law and order, etc), he still retain the Mandate of Heaven. Natural disasters and nomad attacks only serve to reveal existing flaws in government so if the government is well run, they would naturally pass those tests. Basically, not all disaster is a sign of losing the Mandate but failing to deal with those disaster and its aftermath meant that they have lost it.

[@notlessorequal3777]

@@ZACKMAN2007 The CCP caused, and lived through the deadliest famine in recorded human history (The Great Chinese Famine) resulting in millions dead, yet they're still around and kicking, I'm sure a flood or drought or two here and there aint gonna bother them that bit too much.

[@CannibaLouiST]

@@notlessorequal3777 the great leap famine and the later cultural destruction are essentially genocides, both ethnic and cultural

[@theicepickthatkilledtrotsk658]

''There was a time when a completely crazy person took power in China and millions died'' Do you have the slightest idea how little that narrows it down?

[@equilibrum999]

"There was time in Tianxia where 1 kuangren was granted the tianming, and had wanwan renlei killed"

[@greatmusic142]

@@equilibrum999haha bro just translated certain words to mandarin

[@kakahass8845]

@@equilibrum999Wait isn't 天下 just literally the world? So you just inserted a random word there no?

[@namantherockstar]

Master inspires me.. My parents said if i get 50K followers They'd buy me a professional camera for recording..begging u guys , literally Begging...

[@starmaker75]

Even after china got rid of the emperors, Mao still showed that a ruler can still cause some munch death.

[@polarbear6479]

You’d think with that level of horseshit he would be dead within months from assassination or health issues but no he gets to have the second longest reign of the dynasty. Life just ain’t fair

[@lettuceman9439]

One of the good emperor btw before the heavenly mandate expired

[@sultan9givewey]

Maybe virgin menstrual blood is effective afterall, brb gotta do something

[@applesandgrapesfordinner4626]

Tbf, mercury poisoning isn't a nice way to go out and he still never got the immortality he wanted.

[@MUSKETPENGUIN3000]

@@applesandgrapesfordinner4626 sounds like a repeat of history to me

[@applesandgrapesfordinner4626]

@@MUSKETPENGUIN3000 I mean, considering the first emperor

[@lordnoobus7260]

Wikipedia timeline for the Ming dynasty, 1540: "The Jiajing Emperor announces his intention to seclude himself for several years to pursue immortality; a court official says this is nonsense and gets tortured to death"

[@thesittingacheroraptor7565]

"My emperor respectfully what the fu" "Death"

[@LinkoofHyrule]

average ck2 playthrough be like

[@ibrahimchowdhury9779]

THIS ALWAYS MAKE ME LAUGH 😂😂😂

[@1saadx]

@@thesittingacheroraptor7565 Average CN webnovel

[@Diamond-bw8fu]

"1564: Eunuchs drop peaches into the Jiajing Emperor's bed and tell him they fell from heaven"

[@alexmelling5261]

Emperor: *most insane, demonic conduct known to man* "It was the will of heaven dude"

[@ascendedbox612]

just trust me bro

[@equilibrum999]

Emperor: the Tianzi Tiantang: yes i have apointed him to be an emperor what do y want why y say that he copies Jesus, it was he who copied this title totally 100% no scam

[@vit968]

Its always "It was the will of heaven/god" with these egomaniacs

[@youtubeusername1489]

"it is what it is'

[@Zellwand]

@@vit968Taoism

[@teal_m_101]

I feel like Chinese emperors make a better case as to why the pursuit of immortality is a great folly than most stories where the villain seeks immortality.

[@cheesewokka2930]

Theyre Chinese Emperors, they ARE the villains

[@spookyghostwriter3110]

There is a Chinese fable where a emperor is actually given an elixir by a divine being and has to ask for advice if he eats it. The first two guys say he should because of all the possibilites he could do with his life. The third guy points out that if he becomes immortal, everyone he knows and loves will die before he does. The emperor does not take the elixir.

[@JoeSmith-sl9bq]

I don’t think Chinese (Emperors… of course) are capable of love

[@_Lumiere_]

@@spookyghostwriter3110 he was satisfied with just virgin blood

[@yeeyee5057]

​@@JoeSmith-sl9bqdepends on the emperor, as emperors overtime became more depraved and lazy as time went on.

[@BrakeCoach]

Fun fact: 99% of ALL chinese emperors quit just before achieving total mandate of heaven

[@polarpob7858]

💀

[@drek273]

LMFAOOOOOOO

[@user-up4wj9vi3w]

RAHHHHH 🦅🦅🦅

[@claytoncallaway6412]

The emperor had the Mandate of Heaven by default. The Mandate of Heaven can only be taken from the emperor when they’re overthrown by the people

[@major_dude]

The relationship between the Hongzhi emperor and his son, the Zhengde emperor is pretty funny; Hongzhi was one of the only Chinese emperors to take no concubines and stayed loyal to his wife, while Zhengde had so many concubines there were legit problems keeping them all fed, some starved due to the inability to feed them

[@jaif7327]

bro probably into anorexic women

[@historyafficionado478]

Viserys II and Aegon IV be like.

[@nathanseper8738]

I think feeding your harem ought to be the most basic form of decency that any emperor ought to do! If you can't afford to feed your concubines, you really screwed up!

[@youneskasdi]

​@@nathanseper8738imagine owning all of china's riches and you can't spare some food for the women u hump all night

[@stanchanze3702]

the chenghua emperor, who was hongzhi’s dad, didnt even know hongzhi was a son of his until he was 5 years old. yeah... chinese history is weird af

[@mirceazaharia2094]

The entirety of Chinese history seems to be one long sucessions of saying "What the f*ck", "And then it got worse", and "Meanwhile, in China...".

[@youneskasdi]

China is a different breed because uniting that much land and people under one central beirocracy is not a good idea for the people that is

[@jason-qc5lr]

@@youneskasdi yet somehow every single dynasty lasts for centuries.

[@uncle_sanguine852]

@@jason-qc5lr "lasts" more like sickly stumbles with moments of lucidity.

[@kameronjones7139]

​@@jason-qc5lr"last" in a very lose term

[@jason-qc5lr]

@@uncle_sanguine852 all kingdoms are like that

[@vitorpereira9515]

I swear if it wasn't real I would swear it was a comic book villain. It's absurd how much of an idiot that demented person was.

[@yuluoxianjun]

indeed there are lots of worse emperor in China history,some emperor even cut his parents and brothers s feet/arms,and fack their sisters...and even some eat human meat

[@mr.nobody5493]

Hey! Reality is stranger than fiction as they say

[@MegaKnight2012]

After watching the documentary, Hitler's Circle of Evil, for ideas for fictional villains, the truth hits that fictional just aren't as depraved as real ones

[@blazi2293]

Fiction makes more sense than reality, because fiction is made by a human brain and the human brain tries to imagine things that make sense. Reality? Random bullshit goes

[@ocinprofession]

@@MegaKnight2012 We just need depraved authors to make characters which measure up.

[@henryliu1620]

I just want to point out that Jiajing emperor somehow lived up to 60 years old during the late 1500s and while taking mercury pills

[@feifeili1658]

The gods were truly on his side

[@bennygoodmanisgod]

Maybe the virgin period blood actually worked for a while 🤷🏻‍♂️

[@oblivion5390]

virgin menstruation is the best source of protein confirmed

[@zeedingy]

It wasn’t actually that abnormal for ppl to live to 60 in the 1500s, average lifespan was lower because of higher child mortality but if they survived childhood adults could often live a long life. The mercury pills on the other hand probably didn’t help.

[@porkcutlet3920]

@@zeedingy Uh, the average lifespan of Ming emperors was 44. He lived longer than most of the other Ming emperors.

[@AegisAuras]

Props to the maids that actually tried to do something about the problem. They should’ve had a backup plan or two though.

[@ezwan7656]

Yes they should do a 360 no scope with cross bow.

[@AegisAuras]

@@ezwan7656 or anti-freeze in his general tso’s chicken

[@cocacola37281]

they were bunch of teenagers come on

[@OhitsONnow]

L why didn't they just stab him??

[@catenjoyer76]

​@@OhitsONnow I don't think they would have access to any weapons and they were also very young.

[@theicepickthatkilledtrotsk658]

The search for immortality was a favorite pastime of a lot of Far-Eastern rulers. There is a surviving letter from Genghis Khan asking for the secret of eternal life from the heights of all Taoist monks Qiu Chuji. An Immortal Mongol Warlord now that is a scary thought.

[@gregghunt8859]

The best part about that is he was told he would become immortal if he stopped having sex and stopped hunting. But Ghengis basically said “Eh, immortality is overrated anyways.”

[@Limrasson]

@@gregghunt8859 Monks: "Stop hunting and having sex for immortality." Ghengis: "I refuse"

[@ericmotta1]

@@gregghunt8859 didn't he also kill the guy who told him that?

[@kakahass8845]

@@gregghunt8859Wait I'm asexual, aromantic and a vegetarian WHERE THE HELL IS MY IMMORTALITY?

[@kail4997]

What’s the point of immortality if you can’t even get laid.

[@hjluke4807]

He’s also, supposedly, one of the good emperors.

[@DonVigaDeFierro]

Cunny juice got him acting a bit unwise.

[@mirceazaharia2094]

Holy sh*t. China, you cray-cray! 😂

[@equilibrum999]

but no one can beat Da Yu, the only emperor with the title of Great

[@yuanlee440]

Not the most terrible of the Ming Dynasty(by god there were a few bad ones) but definitely not one of the good ones, when it comes to rating him on his personal virtue or achievements he scores poorly in both.

[@everynametaken]

@@equilibrum999 (Possibly) not existing makes him hard to beat

[@OnionIlan]

Least insane moment in Chinese history

[@drstone2358]

😂😂

[@Changed.User100]

Most sane chinese emperor

[@henzy7397]

Not even that false considering he was one of the tamer emperors lmao

[@eco___2016]

"30000 people were eaten"

[@esda2345i6oo]

@@eco___2016 thats kinda low ngl. The most brutal thing Ive ever read is a chinese court history book saying "in the 60th year there was great famine. People ate one another."

[@monkemode8128]

You forgot "and then 300 million peasants died in a civil war because a peasant thought his toast looked kinda like Jesus".

[@MegaKnight2012]

He already did a video on that. 'Chinese Civil wars be like...'

[@monkemode8128]

@@MegaKnight2012 that's hilarious

[@HWDragonborn]

​@@monkemode8128lol, only 20 million people died in the Taiping Rebellion. If 300 million people died at that time, China would be in a demographic crisis even worse than Russia's.

[@linshitaolst4936]

Isn't this a matter of the Qing Dynasty? This video is about the Ming Dynasty emperor

[@MegaKnight2012]

@@monkemode8128 Morbidly so

[@targetseeker]

Too slaaneshi for Khorne, too khornate for Slaanesh.

[@Remitonov]

The Chaos Gods thought they were hot shit, until they saw what the Sons of Heaven get up to.

[@targetseeker]

@@Remitonov even Nurgle was disgusted. Tzeentch is too baffled and just said " i want to see where he's going with this shit"

[@DonVigaDeFierro]

Just heretical enough to be purged 👌

[@oatmealman1586]

​@@targetseekernurgle would probably love Japanese unit 731.

[@mirceazaharia2094]

​@@oatmealman1586 Slaanesh would love anime. As well as the lewd variants.

[@manksui1990]

Most sane chinese emperor

[@mintallylost222]

That fact this is kind of true, considering he was one of the "good" emperors 💀

[@DM-rx2eb]

@@mintallylost222 Only better than his grandson

[@CormCLL]

When you’re in a supervillain contest and your opponent is a Chinese Emperor:

[@jodofe4879]

Well, most emperors were not like this. There were hundreds of emperors and most were pretty mundane and unremarkable. It is the ones that stand out for something that get remembered.

[@aldiascholarofthefirstsin1051]

@@jodofe4879 This here is probably not a good way to stand out.

[@generalrubbish9513]

> ingesting toxic metals to prolong your life Ah yes, the floor here is made out of wall

[@PicesQ]

That shit is working, though. Man lives to be 60 years old, while the average life span of a Chinese emperor is 40.

[@e-tan3911]

@@PicesQ Some people just built different, I guess...

[@forsociopoliticalstuff2629]

@@PicesQlife expectancy in prior to the late 18/early 1900s tend to be heavily scewed due to death by childbirth and childhood mortality rates. Chances are he roughly had a normal-ish life expectancy for someone of his wealth/status/power who made it out of childhood alive and (obviously) didn’t end up pregnant at some point.

[@henryng914]

there were so many "interesting" emperors in Chinese history, I highly recommend to have a look at the the Wei, Jin and Northern and Southern dynasties, here are two examples and the entire periods were filled with these "fun" guys. Liu Ziye( 464-466), his childhood name was literally called wizard (法師), incest with his sister, made his aunt into the queen, killed almost all his uncles and grandparents, became emperor at 15 years old, got killed in 17 years olds, did almost 3000 absurd things in two years. Latter Deposed Emperor of Liu Song (472-477), had to kill someone every day or he wouldn't feel well, and brought torture devices whenever he went. Emperor Wenxuan of Northern Qi (550-559), a super alcoholic, killed people whenever he got drunk, he killed his favourite concubine, then used her bones to make a fiddle and cried sadly while playing that fiddle, he also threatened to marry his mom to barbarian for criticizing him. The period was packed with fine specimens of men like these, it was a very WTF period of history to look into.

[@dannylo5875]

God. Someone should have had a pointy gun. These are worse than Nero. Now Cinderella and princess Kaguya.

[@user-ip2nh3bd1o]

魏晉南北朝 中國最瘋狂的時代

[@linshitaolst4936]

The royal family of Northern Qi was later identified by historians as suffering from familial inherited mental illness. The founding emperor and second emperor of Northern Qi were very powerful, and they fought everywhere, defeating neighboring countries in the south and west and occupying a portion of the land (at that time, China was in a period of three political divisions). Then, they marched northward to conquer the nomadic country of Turkic, achieving a complete victory. The Turkic Khanate married the princess to the first emperor of Northern Qi, But since the third emperor, absurd behavior has emerged. For example, the emperor likes to stand on the city wall and excrete downwards, and orders his ministers to catch him with their mouths. For example, after getting drunk, he likes to run naked in the city. For example, the emperor killed two of the country's best generals on a whim, one of whom was his younger brother

[@clewrites]

The Northern and Southern Dynasties trying to produce an emperor who isn't a psychopath or a hedonist or a massacring usurper who murders 27 relatives or all three. And if they aren't one of those they're probably either dead after 10 minutes on the throne or a child.

[@fanti888]

I just read about Liu Ziye and holy hell was that guy trash. This is what happens when you give this kind of power to an arrogant, stupid teen with anger issues, ig. The amount of people he killed and the stuff he did in just 2 years is astounding. He killed people and their children left and right for the stupidest things possible. “He summoned the princesses to the palace and ordered them to lie down and allow his attendants to have sexual intercourse with them. When his aunt refused, he had her whipped and had her three sons executed.” - His wiki page. Damn

[@HerzegovaGI]

Everytime i learn something new about Chinese history,i realize that reality is truly stranger than fiction.

[@princesswisteria]

Right? It just occurred to me as well 🥲 I really love Chinese historical drama though...Xianxia & Wuxia...they seems so majestic

[@foodeater1236]

@@princesswisteria Wuxia villains will recoil in disgust when they meet an average Chinese Emperor

[@tty9869]

@@foodeater1236 The government was short of funds every years during the Jiajing period, but the Ming treasury was well-stocked when he died. he was did well at money。 all his family all dead because sick,jiajing also sleep 24hours daily in bed. doctor cant help jiajing and he ask some buddhism monks and taoism believers to help him，some taoism belivers turn his body healthy,and he get longevity and crazy in learn taoism. the truly story much longer than it in video

[@legateelizabeth]

Man if I had a nickel for every time a Chinese Emperor neglected the state and performed horrors in pursuit of alchemical immortality I’d have like three nickels and this would definitely be the bloodiest.

[@christophernakhoul3998]

I know of Qin Shi Huang but who's the other?

[@jason-qc5lr]

this guy, believe or not, actually was ok at ruling

[@jason-qc5lr]

until he started getting more and more obsessed with immortality

[@boiii2148]

I am sure you would have like 10 nickels

[@Changed.User100]

@@jason-qc5lrthe fact that it was the mercury that killed him and not menstrual blood is crazy

[@shallowseller3893]

“The Jiajing Emperor announces his intention to seclude himself for several years to pursue immortality; a court official says this is nonsense and gets tortured to death” - Timeline of the Ming Dynasty, 1540

[@M-D-]

😂😂

[@YonIon996]

No wonder Japan are more advanced.

[@SerpentCommando]

​@@YonIon996Japan only start to out advanced China in the late of 19th century tho. Your argument is not valid. Arguably, the technology of that time was still pretty much easier to catch up than today technologies.

[@caseytatum5837]

his advisors: let him cook the emperor watching the palace on fire: let her cook

[@ough.]

who let him cook the 🐈 elixir

[@geodixohard1616]

EDP as a chinese emperor who uses young women is soooo fitting lmao

[@mee091000]

Especially after he just got caught trying to get another underbaked cupcake

[@NucleaRaptor]

WHAT'S A GUIZI GOTTA DO TO GET SUM RED LEAD AROUND HERE!?

[@Cadriul]

@@mee091000 I might be missing something here, but is “underbaked cupcake” a metaphor?

[@leobriccocola8141]

@@Cadriul No, it's absolutely literal.

[@Cooldude-ko7ps]

@@Cadriuly’see one time when he got caught he used the excuse that he was just getting a cupcake the kid made for him. The most recent time he got caught one of the two people confronting him dressed in a cupcake costume.

[@and9091]

The irony is that many emperors who seek to prolong their lives are likely doing so because of the emptiness after all their desires are satisfied (seeking longer lives so they can have more time to savor their emptiness), and regardless of their whether life spans were actually extended or not, they all spent far beyond this extended lifespan at seeking longer live(assuming they were, or at least weren't shortened by some horrific attempt)

[@starmaker75]

Also being an absolute monarch, especially a big and powerful country messes with you. You have so many responsibilities with the economy, military, and religion state, keeping the commoners/peasants to not riot, you almost have no privacy as all the nobles are watching you(even your sex life). It's no wonder why a lot kinda lost it and or become empty.

[@MatthewTraceur]

Sounds like my ck2 playthroughs

[@dannylo5875]

Yeah.

[@SerpentCommando]

​@@starmaker75Not to mention that Emperor who battle through the chaos era actually had that kind of achievement feeling where your hardship pay through and you become the monarch of an Empire. Meanwhile their childrens will just inherite it with no actual purpose in life outside of "be a good emperor" that everyone want you to be.

[@chrismarple]

“I said in my heart, “Come now, I will test you with mirth; therefore enjoy pleasure”; but surely, this also was vanity. I said of laughter-“Madness!”; and of mirth, “What does it accomplish?” I searched in my heart how to gratify my flesh with wine, while guiding my heart with wisdom, and how to lay hold on folly, till I might see what was good for the sons of men to do under heaven all the days of their lives. I made my works great, I built myself houses, and planted myself vineyards. I made myself gardens and orchards, and I planted all kinds of fruit trees in them. I made myself water pools from which to water the growing trees of the grove. I acquired male and female servants, and had servants born in my house. Yes, I had greater possessions of herds and flocks than all who were in Jerusalem before me. I also gathered for myself silver and gold and the special treasures of kings and of the provinces. I acquired male and female singers, the delights of the sons of men, and musical instruments of all kinds. So I became great and excelled more than all who were before me in Jerusalem. Also my wisdom remained with me. Whatever my eyes desired I did not keep from them. I did not withhold my heart from any pleasure, For my heart rejoiced in all my labor; And this was my reward from all my labor. Then I looked on all the works that my hands had done And on the labor in which I had toiled; And indeed all was vanity and grasping for the wind. There was no profit under the sun.” ‭‭Ecclesiastes‬ ‭2‬:‭1‬-‭11‬ ‭

[@sarpyasar5893]

The worst thing is he probably thought it was working due to second longest reign in ming dynasty

[@xuanchenzhou9813]

I as a young girl reading Ming dynasty history thought that worked. Debated with myself for a while when I saw my menarche on if I should lick it

[@kingsley.]

⁠​⁠@@xuanchenzhou9813thats stupid

[@SerpentCommando]

Oh dear, i glad you didn't

[@baoanhnguyen9186]

Even more amazing, Jiajing was recorded as intelligent, and did not neglect court matters, despite later not attending court, as well as whatever the fuck shown in this video. It’s wild.

[@jason-qc5lr]

he was intelligent, but he went down the deep end

[@Xx_SuperPenis_xX]

​@@jason-qc5lrvirgin blood got him acting unwise

[@jason-qc5lr]

@@Xx_SuperPenis_xXlol

[@Phoenix-fw7bm]

@@Xx_SuperPenis_xXlmao

[@RKNGL]

He lived the longest not because of the Virgin blood but because he was terrible. Some of the worst rulers tend to live the longest if they manage to avoid assassination. This feels like it's a law of the universe at this point.

[@Xx_SuperPenis_xX]

The people you despise the most live the longest

[@bennygoodmanisgod]

“The Tao” one might say (I’m not sorry)

[@blackkennedy3966]

Because people fear them. but if you are too terrible people fear you too much that they band together to kill you. There’s a fine line I guess.

[@equilibrum999]

the law of the Yin side of the Dao

[@SuperGGLOL]

Yes the bad guys live the longest and the good guys die early. It’s the universe’s way of balancing. The good guys are too.. OP!

[@unowno123]

It's a mystery to me why chinese emperors aren't a hot thing for horror movies in hollywood Only chinese genius can create such horror

[@zebimicio5204]

the cultural backlash would be insane If there's only one group tht can made fun of their emperors, its the chinese themselves

[@AikisDominator]

That would dishonor CCP because it dishonors Chinese story and culture and that is a big no no.

[@giantotter319]

Because china is a market with solid amount of money

[@zebimicio5204]

@@AikisDominator trust me, its not even about the ccp, the average chinese would raise a fork pitch. You have no idea how nationalistic the chinese can get, and its has been a thing for millenias too

[@apropercuppa8612]

@@zebimicio5204 I'm sorry. How exactly are Chinese people in China a threat to American people in America with pitch forks?..

[@pechorin5842]

An emperor refuse to do anything is usually better than an emperor who try to do something.

[@bennygoodmanisgod]

As Lao Tzu once said “he who does nothing does not make for good memes but he who does something does make for lols”

[@brenobassocenci6571]

I think that the punishment inflicted on the palace maids was not very good, he made the noob mistake of not killing the cities from where they came from.

[@lord_napoli]

They could do that to all cities of the 300 maids and still lose 1% of the total population.

[@brenobassocenci6571]

@@lord_napoli where are you ketting your math lesions? It would be way lower than that.

[@pll3827]

It sounded like the punishment was his queen's idea, which was why he was so upset. Which brings up the also crazy consideration that he may have been perfectly fine with forgiving at least one of the maids for trying to commit regicide.

[@socialistrepublicofvietnam1500]

​@@brenobassocenci6571they said the entire cities, not just the maids

[@life_is_a_myth]

Based

[@shubashuba9209]

The emperor really said, "They were trying to kill me? I thought they were just being kinky." 😭

[@tzeentchnco.7441]

I was eating my cup of vanilla yogurt. I was eating it at a normal pace, but as the video kept playing and the amount of degeneracy I was subjected to. My normal pace of eating turned into a sluggishly slow pace of absolute traumatic terror...

[@1saadx]

Then you haven't seen enough...

[@dannylo5875]

Maybe it was your yogurt that was traumatic. I am positive about it wasn't the video. But the vanilla flavoring did so.

[@LibeliumDragonfly]

Go read up on the Liu Song dynasty from 5th century DE then...... And no yogurt this time.

[@henrylam9959]

You forgot to mention that Jiajing literally went on strike for more than 20 years by refusing to attend any cabinet meeting.

[@zhouxinghan6986]

That's right, and he somehow managed to keep his control over the government and his officials. I think dude is just tired of all those civil servants

[@prasanth2601]

​@@zhouxinghan6986 How is it even possible!?

[@tty9869]

​@@prasanth2601 most chinese belive he is the smartest emperor, everyone were played in his hand。 every power official who gived power by jiajing, always whole family and all officials who had friendship with power guy were executed in the end, and all their money into Treasury, nobody able to corruption money in jiajing's life

[@esda2345i6oo]

@@prasanth2601 during the ming dynasty, the government was divided into 6 cabinets, each in charge of an aspect of governance. It is believed that 2 of the heads of the most powerful cabinets (finance and burreaucracy) are his puppets

[@Tmb1112]

“Second longest reign in Ming history.” So you’re telling me… it might’ve worked? 👀

[@ReincarnationofiForgor]

I gotta try that to make sure

[@MohitPJoshi]

Jiajing Emperor- *getting strangled by all his present concubines* Also the Jiajing Emperor- 🙄

[@TruthSeekers13]

He must like bsdm

[@stanisawzokiewski3308]

You know what? I’m fine with being mortal. I’m fine with being a regular ass normal non notable human being. I don’t do anyone any wrong and I’m fine with that. Have a nice day everyone reading. I hope to forget the content of this video soon.

[@user-ft9ul5ul5v]

Have a nice day too! ^^

[@gunbun1048]

I would like to know the source behind the concoction's recipe and working. The guy who made it surely must've been trolling on an insane level or was actually insane

[@mori5481]

he wrote the recipe as a shitpost in the middle of actual chemical processes and people took it seriously (I hope)

[@Chocolacchio]

It seems they saw menstrual blood from virgins as some kind of pure extract and obviously it's red

[@thesittingacheroraptor7565]

This is like future scientist taking 4chan recipes, and actually trying them

[@cryingbananajo]

Must have thought in this direction: young girls are pure and sweet so the blood they remove during menstruation is what keeps one looking young and when they hit menopause they become old. So taking the blood would make one live long. The people where lucky that the person that gave the Emperor advice did not give the idea of eating baby's or the like. That would have been pure horror.

[@Tian-wi6qr]

@@cryingbananajo Considering this guy was one of the more "sane" emperors, I wouldn't be surprised if those other less sane emperors ate babies as a pastime.

[@JahNuhThunDeeTheOneAndOnly]

Chinese history is literally more insane than LOTR, Star Wars, Harry Potter, Metal Gear, Zelda, Final Fantasy, Halo, and Elder Scrolls *COMBINED*

[@upisntdownsilly]

i wouldn’t say lotr… have you read middle earth lore? Sauron loses a 1v1 duel against a big doggy in the silmarilion book. in truth the 3 lotr film adaptations capture like less than 5% of the content in the lotr books, and the lotr books only cover a specific few years in the third age of middle earth, and there’s like many thousands of years of events that unfolded before then because Tolkien just had that many ideas. it’s honestly funny if you read into the lore, because all the formidable and powerful characters in lotr itself are really either mid or weak, like in the first age there were high elves that solo’d balrogs and the wizards and sauron are only maiar, which basically makes them demi-semi gods since there’s 2 more levels of god above them

[@crimson6864]

Pelinal Whitestrake might have something to say about that

[@FlatChestsAreDelicious]

Chinese history be like: >Chao Ling takes power >Billions perish

[@stanchanze3702]

here are some more stories about ming dynasty emperors. the zhengde emperor, who is the cousin of the jiajing emperor (the emperor shown in the video) created a palace called "Bao Fang" which houses leopards and lions for his own enjoyment. a year before he died, he was drunk while boating and fell off the boat, almost drowning in the process. the jiajing emperor’s grandson, the wanli emperor, was so fed up with his ministers that he didn’t attend any court meetings for the last 20 years of his reign, basically neglecting his entire empire for 20 years. wanli’s son, the taichang emperor died 3 weeks into his reign, which is ironic since his dad, wanli, reign for 48 years, which is the longest in the ming dynasty. the taichang emperor fell ill and had very severe diarrhoea. one official suggested the emperor to take a red pill to counter the effects of the diarrhoea. he initially felt better after taking it but died shorter after. he died so quickly that the wanli emperor’s body was still lying in state. the ming dynasty period is vv amusing and the stories i told here barely scratches the surface on the things that happened back then

[@Ndles-we1xv]

Also don’t forget Liu Bei apparently was chill with some farmer feeding him his wife, ditched his wife and baby when his enemies attacked, and then further proceeded to chuck his own baby as a sign of thanks to the guy that saved the baby. He is considered extremely virtuous.

[@AnimusFerrus]

If I'm not mistaken, Cao Cao (the villain/nemesis of that era), found out about the whole 'wife eating' thing and was absolutely mortified at the situation and all parties involved.

[@quoccuongtran724]

but then Luo Guanzhong was a Han fanboy so his writing for the Shu faction is likely biased

[@yeeyee5057]

​@@AnimusFerrusCao Cao also killed his benefactor's whole family because 'I would rather betray the whole world than let the world betray me', and then proceeding to massacre cities in the Xu province because his father died in the ambush and the perpetrators were supposedly involved with the governor of said province. There's also the fact that Cao Cao got Dian Wei and his first son Cao Ang killed because he slept with the govenors widowed aunt in law. So he's not as good as you think either

[@yeeyee5057]

​@@quoccuongtran724Luo Guanzhong was also commissioned to write the records because he was one of the few people who lived throughout the entire period.

[@jason-qc5lr]

this was a war period, so its nothing surprising tbh. if he had died with his wife and children who would inherit his position? it has something to do with china's questionable system of "respect" and honor. judging an eastern civilization with western ideologies. why am i not surprised.

[@teal_m_101]

This make the Romans look like Star Trek's Federation.

[@goddepersonno3782]

to bring peace to humanity, you have to first conquer the world the Romans just didn't get to finish the job #Ceasardidnothingwrong

[@lettuceman9439]

China : *I* Roman : Fighting each other Bharat : Divided Mesomerica : Dying

[@piper2432]

Nah, read the kinda shit Nero or Caligula or Tiberius gets up to

[@greatsageequaltoheaven8115]

​@@goddepersonno3782Ceaser was a tryant #Brutusdidnothingwrong

[@plazmaguy13yago9]

​@@greatsageequaltoheaven8115#brutus was a traitor and he is now burning in hell

[@jiangtai5170]

Chinese Nationalism loves this dynasty, for it is ruled by the Han Chinese Emperor, and this so-loved han Chinese dynasty deleted Mencius from the Confucian philosopher list. Some of Mencius's ideas: 1. To the state, the citizen is the most important, then is the nation itself, and the emperor is the least important thing/ 2. If the emperor treats his people like dust, then his people have the right to treat the emperor like their enemy/

[@badart3204]

True pioneer in social contract theory

[@giao2908]

虽然明朝的皇帝大多昏庸荒唐，朝廷官员贪污内斗不止，可依然做到了天子守国门，君王死社稷，和晚清那量中华之物力，结与国之欢心的统治阶层对比不要太明显

[@Zero_Li24]

The great fall of the ancient chad mindset

[@equilibrum999]

the 2nd one would be more like 'It is a part of Mandate of Heaven for if a ruler rules unjustly and with terror for his people to revolt'

[@AlphariusOmegon618]

This Mencius guy sounds fucking great

[@cheesyfromindonesia9969]

Least delusional emeror in Chinese history

[@jason-qc5lr]

thats bullshit

[@dimasakbar7668]

No cannibalism = sign of good times and orderly reign

[@izzatsufian2796]

Most normal history in China.

[@ApostleOfDarkness]

"Another day, another Chinese history video, another happy day" -Confucius

[@arnavrawat9864]

I can't imagine how painful the final moments of those maids who died from slow slicing must've been. Excruciating beyond every measure, just for failing the most basic task of tying the knot right. The beauty of the universe is boundless, but fate is really cruel sometimes.

[@altithoraxperotorum5133]

This makes gengis khan look like a reasonable Person

[@vishnu2407]

Bro fed the girls like they were silkworms

[@luonggiaphat7946]

Imagine if the "medicine" had actually succeed, and this story spread to Europe, the Middle East and South East Asia, things won't be pretty for hundreds of little girls.

[@yelloweyes8345]

Oof

[@adrianoarne-ritz249]

The one thing that made me relieved that nothing is immortal

[@MTTC-me5dj]

​@@adrianoarne-ritz249death is a blessing for many at the end of the day

[@Tian-wi6qr]

Things probably already weren't good for little girls during that time in any part of the world, considering most of the people had no human rights.

[@Zero_Li24]

​@@Tian-wi6qrdamn I wished I lived in that era

[@greatkentuckian9032]

So many people trying to achieve immortality, but fail at every way possible

[@zebimicio5204]

ironic thing is he's the second longest reigning emperor for the ming dynasty!

[@bennygoodmanisgod]

That doesn’t mean we shouldn’t keep trying!

[@ough.]

@@bennygoodmanisgodmhm. maybe it doesnt exist, but hey lets let ideas flow

[@FreeSpeechAbsolutist1776]

Eternal life does exist, but it only exists as a free gift from Christ Jesus whom He gives to all who put their faith in Him.

[@MotherGapshin12]

Don't forget the concubine who somehow managed to escape to Japan and becoming the wife of some random provincial daimyo.

[@starmaker75]

Small world

[@augustovasconcellos7173]

If a villain in a movie did half the shit you average Chinese emperor did, you'd have lambasted it as unrealistic, cartoonishly, over-the-top evil. But these people existed. I have to apologize to the people who write old-school cartoon villains. Their work was far more realistic than I could have known.

[@RealEMojomaker]

Bro let his wife burn to death over a ho that tried to kill him, now that's just Top J behaviour.

[@OperationNonsense]

He’s announcing to the world “hey! I’m not just disgusting, I’m also stupid!”

[@abcdef27669]

"Perhaps I was too harsh on you..." - Myself towards the Qing Dynasty, after seeing this video.

[@jaredjosephsongheng372]

This is a real china moment right here

[@jason-qc5lr]

true. ive seen much worse from the west though. lol for instance nero, who watched an entire section of rome burn

[@ough.]

@@jason-qc5lrdayum

[@ough.]

i personally think all sides have their weird shit round

[@jessietricia1609]

Qin Shi Huang: great idea, why didn't I think of this?

[@how_to_be_a_Old_legionary44]

that a good one bro! XD

[@standard-carrier-wo-chan]

I like to think that he actually did became immortal, but not invincible, which is why the mercury poisoning got him.

[@richardchang4743]

This is truly the sanest emperor in Chinese vast history.

[@bennygoodmanisgod]

You really underestimate the Chinese, then…

[@tomli9793]

nop

[@CannibaLouiST]

Also, his early reign saw the imperial military defeating the Portugese navy who were occupying the Lantau Island and the surrounding areas of Hongkong - Tamão

[@minecraftlover-oj2xj]

I swear, there's always a way people use to achieve "immortality" even if its nuts.

[@themememaster9582]

Literally every single aspect of this entire story is batshit insane. I wouldn’t expect less from the country that gifted us with General Dogmeat.

[@Mortablunt]

General Dogmeat is the great poet of 20th century China. “Fuck you. Fuck you. Fucking bastards. And fuck you, too. I’ll fuck your mothers. And fucking kill you.”

[@Elenrai]

I will blow up your mum. Best insult ever

[@socialistrepublicofvietnam1500]

He tells me this He tells me that You are all b*stards Go f*ck your mother

[@jason-qc5lr]

only looking at the dark side of things is very biased just so you know

[@life_is_a_myth]

Better than the country you come from at least

[@Zetact_]

It's like in an RPG when they make a new enemy by palette swapping one of the previous ones, they just took Qin Shi Huang and painted him with menstrual blood.

[@aaronrichardsoong4110]

Nah man. Qin Shi Huang although brutal was much more ambitious and contributed to China much more

[@jason-qc5lr]

seriously? comparing qin shihuang with him? thats the most superficial thing i have heard in a while.

[@Meme-Republic]

Post-Story: he ascend to immortal realm and became the Patriach of bloodbath sect.

[@fayper2213]

Well judging by how he ruled more than 45 years maybe his immortality alchemy wasn't so bad after all

[@adrianoarne-ritz249]

Blud acted unwise and OD'ed on 🐈 elixir

[@itsbromine5371]

Gives a whole new meaning to the phrase “bloody Mary”

[@TakCWAL]

The Ming Dynasty had an entire catalogue of Caligulas and Neros. It's a miracle the Dynasty lasted as long as it did, especially considering 1/3 of the Dynasty's lifespan, its Emperors were nowhere to be found. Hell, Jiajing wasn't even the worst example.

[@ReincarnationofiForgor]

Respect the grind 💪

[@harristsang2]

The worst part? Those actions were considered relatively normal when it comes to Chinese emperors. I can name quite a few much more insane than this

[@oofdotcom]

I feel like lots of people had ideas to keep young with blood as I remember a story my Slovak parents told me of a woman who lived on a castle and killed young girls to bathe in their blood

[@Dawid.O]

Elizabeth Báthory. A myth and legend made up to slander her by nobles and seize her land.

[@jayasuryangoral-maanyan3901]

​@@Dawid.Owell, it is disputed by historians so it could have happened

[@sdgedfegw6508]

how this guy took all kinds of toxic shits and still became the 2nd longest ruler is nothing short of miracle

[@shinigamik3027]

As a Chinese person, I apologise for my ancestors 💀

[@ezwan7656]

No need for that. This Chinese emperor oppressed your own Chinese people. 🤣

[@tomli9793]

💀

[@sophieirsa1306]

You don't have to, my man

[@menelmacar0109]

Jiajing（嘉靖）originally meant "great and peaceful", but has the same pronunciation as “家净” （family bankrupt） in Chinese. One furious official, Hai Rui, pointed this out,（嘉靖，家家净也）hinting that every single family in China had gone bankrupt under His Majesty's Most Benevolent Rule. Surprisingly, Jiajing did not kill him for this offense (because his favourite minister told him this would make Hai Rui look like a martyr), but instead dumped him in the royal prison. Years later, Jiajing died, and his successor always held Hai Rui in high esteem. So guards in Hai Rui's prison prepared a feast and told him the news. However, Hai Rui lamented Jiajing so badly that he began to cough blood. Scary ancient China.

[@hawkingstar1698]

China does have a history of self trolling

[@pangkamotegames]

*homie emperor got the full metal alchemist commercial lmfao*

[@nont18411]

“I don’t brush my teeth because I’m like a tiger and a tiger doesn’t brush its own teeth.” - Mao Zedong

[@Jalreal]

"I bathe myself in the bodies of my women" - Mao Zedong (allegedly)

[@ough.]

nah all their philosophies going wild

[@infweaker]

Dude's reign was also crazy. Considering his fantic love for Taoism he almost never attended morning assemblies (which most emperors would attend/ lead every morning at 6am), however still remained strong political power by diplomacy and keeping two factions always in opposition. He did however fucked up when flood hit southern part of Ming and basically just did fucking wizardry instead sending help and starved like 100k

[@giacomoromano8842]

They picked a knot that did not tighten? Thank the Buddha i did Scout, so that's not an issue i will incur if i ever decide to murder someone with a ribbon.

[@Triantafyllos_Strantzalis]

Most sane moment in Chinese History and the most sane Emperor.

[@jason-qc5lr]

naw mate

[@Triantafyllos_Strantzalis]

​@@jason-qc5lrhi

[@szczepan4737]

Chinese and Roman Emperors would be best buds

[@bruhm4571]

The Roman emperors would be horrified with this

[@scoopish2880]

i was just watching another video of yours and when i tabbed back this was up, lets fucking go

[@jayck7686]

The fact that nowdays millionares are making transfusions to replace their blood with those of young kids to better their bodies and on top of that is working makes this look like the wrong aimed shot of a visionary

[@pandemicphilly60]

I mean. He did live pretty long for an emperor. Might have been onto something.

[@OhitsONnow]

Actually. Now that I think about it. A lot of animals eat the placenta after birth. I know that a number of women need iron pills after periods. Is it possible that because of the """high Nutrition content""" of the blood and his, erm, change of diet that he lived long?

[@maxthexpfarmer3957]

well ingesting blood is very different from injecting it

[@KaoticReach1999]

Uh...source?

[@jayck7686]

​@@KaoticReach1999i am really trying to answer you but it seems my answer gets auto deleted

[@marwapranata5698]

The part where the kids were taken to the palace for the emperor's live prolonging medicine reminds me a lot with Warhammer 40K, there's an actual lore like that

[@The-Opium-Den]

40k can stomp other sci-fi universes, but lore wise the franchise has nothing on China! Wouldn’t surprise me if a Black Library writer decided to borrow heavily from Chinese history for his next book.

[@SwissCheese34]

​@@The-Opium-DenSome sci-fi universes. I would wager on The Culture or the Qu (they were even more insane) if they were to meet the IoM

[@The-Opium-Den]

@@SwissCheese34 I didn’t think I’d encounter a Culture fan here. I’ve only read The Player of Games and I must say I liked it quite a bit. Indeed, the Culture does have the Imperium of Man beat, but sadly the Culture books aren’t part of a multimedia franchise like 40k, Harry Potter, or Lord of the Rings.

[@SwissCheese34]

@@The-Opium-Den It's quite overlooked sadly

[@HARDTEKKK]

“Two Chinese men bump into each other” -400 million perished

[@anasibrahim8178]

Why is no one talking about how heavenly the music is. It is so nice and soothing

[@MoskalMedia]

How has this story not been made into a movie?? I'd love to see somebody like Wong Kar-Wai make a movie out of this story.

[@Aztesticals]

Bro wtf they had him tied down and didn't just bash his head in with a pot or a rock. Or stab him with a writing implementation or decorative weapon. Theu deserved their punishment. Can't pass down that lack of competency under preassure

[@theclowninghasbegun3442]

Whoa, a Chinese vampire

[@ReincarnationofiForgor]

💀

[@Tonnex]

This was WAY more wild than what I was imagining when I klicked on the video

[@yuzihua]

you forgot the best part! in 1540 he announced his intention to seclude himself for several years to pursue immortality and a court official called that nonsense and was tortured to death