Chris Voss on Unlocking Open-Ended Question Superpowers

[@saleswithKyle]

This is one of the better interviews I've heard with Chris, kudos! IT stays on track, and emphasizes what he's talking about, not about the interviewers credentials, experience, etc... Great job.

[@Press1ForNick]

Wow. Thanks, Kyle! I appreciate your support.

[@securityvlogger6825]

I sell alarm systems to home and small businesses for a living. By far the most challenging ‘negotiations’ I have to deal with is with my wife. If I ask her “How am I supposed to do that?”, I feel like that would be a dream come true for her as she would help me with 1000 micromanaging ways to run my life taking it as an open ended invitation to tell me exactly how wrong I am!

[@Joey-kr4mn]

Most of this is gold. However in enterprise software sales, i’m dealing with experienced buyers, often c-level. The answer to ‘how am I supposed to do it’ is 9/10 times: that’s your problem not mine, instead of the other way around. Just labeling it as the limit of the negotiation is too easy. That ends every negotiation I have with a non-favourable outcome from my side. It would be great to hear other plays from people that counter this move I hear over, and over again.

[@at-last]

How supposed to do that? Whats your most important challenge. Stops one dead in tracks. Slow Thinking... Forced Empathy... Issue"s not the answer. Its One thing but so powerful. Grand slam home run. If put back on you...then dealing with non collaborative. Found the limit without pushing them away from the table nor radioactive toxic waste. If you want the deal you're going to do it

[@orlovae1]

What is wrong with open-ended questions starting from "Why"?I heard some doctors artistically using them to make a patient start thinking what is wrong in their life style, and have their own solution, which may be more motivating for changes.

[@AaronCPalmer]

Because 'why' is an accusation, 'why' is a burner on a hot stove. Best used carefully. Seasoned with salt.

[@negarsiadatnejad5963]

Because "why" implies that you're doing something wrong. Like you said, "to make a patient start thinking what is wrong in their life style." The point is not to make someone feel like they're doing something wrong but to draw awareness to what what they are actually doing, (there's more depth w/ this method) because often times our actions are unconscious. Instead a physician can ask, "what comes up for you when every time overeat or take that second drink.."

[@orlovae1]

@@negarsiadatnejad5963 Thank you. Clear. In the case I had in mind the situation itself was not such that the blaming would be natural. It was about high heart rate and insomnia. I see that in the situations like that you mentioned "why" might hurt.

[@Press1ForNick]

I completely agree. Why put people on the defense. What is more neutral.

[@ironcross1252]

In what context would you use that phrase “how am I suppose to do that?” I wouldn’t know when to use that

[@Press1ForNick]

One example would be if someone is asking you to reduce your price for service.

[@ironcross1252]

@@Press1ForNick dude that is a excellent example! Wow thank you

[@Press1ForNick]

👍🏻

[@mgnwill]

Just responding to “What am I supposed to do about that?” with “That’s your problem” is not being uncollaborative, it’s being collaborative expecting the first speaker to take their share of the collaborative responsibility. To say “What am I supposed to do about that?” in the first place is not being collaborative. It’s as good as saying, “I’m not going to lift a finger in this negotiation, because I expect you to take responsibility for everything/to make all the concessions”.

[@Press1ForNick]

A slight tweak to your comment. Chris Voss says "How am I supposed to do that"? This makes it more collaborative.

[@MarcMancuso8]

He sounds like Al Pacino

[@georginajovanovic]

I would like to train with you and teach me negotiation if you are ever teaching in the uk

[@Press1ForNick]

This should provide you more information: www.blackswanltd.com/services/training-for-individuals

[@aliciastewart3037]

As a Healthcare employee, I've unknowingly asked this question to upper level management. I have several certifications and I was experiencing management to do specific tasks. I've had management tell me "to figure it out". Now, I understand they were not collaborative. But when it came to a sim month review and/or review, how 🤔 do I request an appropriate raise?

[@Press1ForNick]

This video might help: kzbin.info/www/bejne/a2rNpGpqlLdrY7M

[@georginajovanovic]

What are you trying to prove in terms of your intention of this line of questions?

[@Press1ForNick]

The goal is to get the other person to keep talking. The more they talk, the more information they share.

[@iFreeThink]

Better than Greek worsening.

[@johncarnettie6804]

This is like instead of Jordan Peterson you have a barstool guy telling you stuff

[@Press1ForNick]

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