chronic illness & ms // artist diaries

[@CharReed]

I appreciate your sharing your journey through this whole process. I just got diagnosed with adhd this year at 40, unfortunately the super low energy/brain fog kind that made me think I had an autoimmune disease, it’s been so bad. I work 4 jobs and my only way to get healthcare is to stay poor enough for my state’s medicaid program. It’s allowed me to get several diagnoses over the past two years, medication and treatment. It’s not super fun to juggle, but I’m hoping to be able to swap at least two of my jobs out for my art career one of these days. I initially saw your ‘it’s ok to work slow’ video and then saw this one. I wanted to offer encouragement to keep continuing on and stay open minded, flexible and think outside the box. If i’ve learned anything over the two decades I’ve been trying to make an art career for myself, it’s that another job can help you do your art, it doesn’t have to be your identity. Also extending your timeline out might not feel like an option, but it could help you to ultimately achieve your goals. But of course, do what’s best for you and know there are people out there relating to your story and wishing you the absolute best ❤

[@ShojiPanda]

I am grateful to you for sharing this. I also have chronic illnesses and have been looking for videos from fellow artists dealing with the same issues, as inspiration. It's difficult to see videos of healthy people saying 'just do this or that and you can be successful like me' when they don't have the added burden of navigating life with chronic illness. Please don't give up. I look forward to your pursuit of building this channel. Sending hugs from one spoonie to another.🐼💕

[@petty.artist]

Im chronically ill/immunocompromised and an artist too. I was also diagnosed at 23. Thank you for this video, it’s really difficult to talk to people about my experience and to get them to understand what I’m going through. I’m one of those people who aren’t as privileged to access adequate medical care and the struggle is very, very hard. Of course it’s difficult for anyone to become disabled but when you don’t have proper care and support you feel like you’ve fallen into a dark pit that’s impossible to get out of. I’ve had to accept that I can’t go into my chosen field of animation because of my joint pain. I’m not even sure if I can do art at all anymore. I really empathize with your fears and struggles (chronic fatigue and brain fog puts a lot of limits on what I can do too). Being an artist has also been my why, and I can’t help but feel like I’ve lost all grips on who I am. I’m trying to find new ways to being an artist that’s accessible to me and finding your channel a month ago and seeing this video now makes me feel like maybe I can still do something artistic that is attainable and worthwhile to me. As you’ve stated there is no certainty when it comes to chronic illness and things can change very quickly. So who knows? But I hope it works out for the both of us.

[@CharReed]

I dont know if your joint pain would make it so sculpting is out of the question, but if you were able to do that, you could marry sculpture with stop motion and pursue animation that way. And even if you dont sculpt something from scratch, I’ve seen really successful stop motions just using articulated toys and action figures. Where there’s a will, there’s a way! ❤

[@aidamaria_reads]

I feel this on so many levels as a chronically ill person who’s a creative as well (I love writing stories and poetry and would like to one day make that my source of income, although I’d like to take up drawing again as my ‘slow’ hobby). Currently looking for a ‘boring’ job I can do remotely, but since the worst of the pandemic is over, employers want their employees back at the office where they can see them (which is hard to keep up for me physically). There are so many annoying factors you have to take into account to make it possible to work fulltime and not take to much from your body in the process (e.g. (public) transport, tough schedules etc.). I hope we can both find a solution that will tap into both our physical and mental/creative needs. Sending you lots of love 💗🍀

[@HajarAli-u4e]

Thank you so much for showing up for yourself and inspiring others with your honest and brave journey. I feel seen and heard as i also navigate a path in pursuing creative fields whilst managing a chronic condition. It does get scary and anxious at times, but I remember that there will always be hope. ❤❤❤

[@dwimmered]

I don't know how to use any fancy words but I still wanted to tell you I really really hope your health stays well under control so your body can serve you well into the old age creating art and following your dreams

[@AshWednesday06]

I know it’s cliche to say but please stay strong! 🙏🏽 Don’t give up, you are doing great! You have an amazing mindset about your future and don’t let those hard, scary days win! I’m 35, a single mom of two, I’ve had to work hard & physical jobs, my hands hurt everyday, and it scares the shit out of me to think that one day I may not be able to pick up a drawing pencil anymore. Unfortunately I wasn’t able to follow a path in art, but idk where I’d be if I couldn’t create anymore. And believe me, I’m not trying to compare my situation to yours at all, but the fear of not being able to create art anymore I do understand! Please keep up what you are doing, you have the passion and skills to make it!! I’m rooting for you!! 🙏🏽💪🏽🩷

[@zoepollock7010]

Don't give up on your dreams, you can make it work. You are strong and brave and you will do it ❤

[@misaandcoart]

While I don't have a chronic illness I am currently pursuing a potential diagnosis for ADHD and can understand the brain fog. I'm also recovering from pneumonia and the massive work with emotional regulation and being more present has definitely helped with being kinder to myself as I recover. I cannot imagine what it's like for you, even hearing your story I can sympathise but can never truly understand as I haven't experienced it myself. I want to express how much I admire your strength, to share your story as well as enduring through all of that. It's so easy to take health for granted, I've only been off work for 2.5 weeks and it's made things so much more difficult already. I cannot imagine how I'd cope if I had something like MS given my reliance on my body as it's a physically taxing role. I think that for your support you should consider doing a Patreon with rewards that don't put too much pressure on you. Even just a monthly group Discord call so you didn't have to physically do anything, and that way you'd have an extra revenue and your community can help support you. Also I can understand if it's something that you wouldn't want to consider, but potentially have a think on potential other countries you could see yourself living in that provide free healthcare. I noticed you mentioned you enjoy travelling so it could be something that would allow you to continue your creative career while also providing the support you need. ♥

[@fancysmudges]

Thank you so much, I really appreciate that!! It's definitely a challenge but I'm determined to eventually find a good balance for myself. I am also planning out a Patreon page right now which should hopefully not be super taxing in the long run! Thank you so much for watching and I hope you take care as well 🧡

[@Renagade14]

I really honestly love how real and awesome your videos are. Please keep going! You have so much talent and so much to offer. You definitely made my day a little bit brighter.

[@andrea15026]

I recently found and subscribed to your channel with the "it's okay to make art slowly" video. I really liked the message in the video and I also really liked and appreciated your sincerity and honesty on all of your thoughts concerning artists and their relationship to their own art; I really related and took the advice to heart. Your sincerity and honesty really shone through in this video as well, and I appreciate that you shared with your community this difficult thing that you have to deal with because I know that a lot of people are also going through something similar, with both their health and their future careers, which can cause feelings of fear and uncertainty, but having another person who also knows what it's like is comforting (in a solidarity and supportive sort of way). I know that it was helpful for me at least, not to mention I'm also attempting my own art career endeavors in the face of being in a field that is not art related at all. The attempt to pivot in that direction is there, and I'm kind of scared but I'm also hopeful. All of this to say that I can relate, and it's tough out there, but I don't think success is out of reach for any of us artists. I truly believe that it is possible to figure things out and that things will work out, even if it's scary at first. I'm not great with words, so I hope that the message got across okay, but yeah, I admire you, and I'm rooting for your success in your art journey and beyond! You've got this!!!

[@shebonyshand]

Hey love, im a carer for my mum and she has MS as well, she relapsed in 2017, I feel for you , she was diagnosed in 1999 and it was horrible for her as the doctor was blase about it, im happy she was able to walk and hear throughout my childhood. MS is weird as hell, the numbness around the abdomen is scary. Sorry for the long paragraph. I'm just happy that you are kinda okay and medicine has gotten better nowerdays. I pray for your wellbeing and hopefully art can be your peace ❤❤

[@Martina.Mustac]

I wish you good luck and hope you succeed. I myself also deal with autoimmune and inflammatory disease and you hit the nail in the head with saying how sleep affects it. Take care and stay positive ❤

[@TheBlackHatOutlaw]

First and foremost, I'm sorry you have to go through any of this, chronic illness is no joke. You don't realize how much something like that affects a person, how it can get into the tiniest cracks of everyday life until you feel it for yourself. I don't quite have a chronic illness, but I do live with mental illness with physical symptoms and my father was a cancer patient for 15 years. I know brain fog so well. You can think about something simple, like taking a sip of your drink only to realize you're extremely thirsty and reminded yourself to take that sip 6 times in the past 3 hours before you actually do it. Sadly I don't have much advice to offer you because... well... affording care isn't in the cards for me, but I do think you can get through this. I can tell from this video how much strength and determination you have and I wish you the best of luck with this.

[@JCarrera_ll]

❤👏

[@ambubb]

I hope it will work for you to porsue an art carrier! Handling life and pacing with a chronic illness is so hard!

[@blippo]

Hi! We sent you an email! Looking forward to hearing from you! 💜💜

[@bychechisart]

Following dreams as an artist is scary, so I can’t imagine how you feel after being diagnosed, I wish you the best of luck 🤍✨. I understand so well how you feel as an artist, but please don’t give up on your dreams, your art is beautiful and I think someday we will make it ✨

[@HajarAli-u4e]

Thank you so much for showing up for yourself and inspiring others with your honest and brave journey. I feel seen and heard as i also navigate a path in pursuing creative fields whilst managing a chronic condition. It does get scary and anxious at times, but I remember that there will always be hope. ❤❤❤