Coffee Chat: Dealing with Hard Times

[@TallWeedsandRust]

You're not just another dude! So very few would honor their marriage vows the way you continue to, so many walk away for far far less reason. Your wife is a very blessed woman to have you as her caretaker, and your children are equally blessed to have you. God surely had His hand in your union, knowing you'd be there for your family through all that was coming your way. ❤

[@DIANNEELEE]

I had a neighbor that was the opposite of what happened to you as far as the marriage partner. A young couple was married and had two children. The husband had a job. The wife took care of the children. They saved enough money to buy a home. But as they moved into their home the husband had a stroke. He was confined to a wheelchair and never really recovered. Her name was Rosie and she got a job and she supported her family. Back then jobs for women were not that plentiful. But she never deserted her family and took care of her husband . He passed away years later but had always been taken care of by his wife. She never remarried . She never thought of herself as a hero but to me she was, as you are even though you wouldn't say it .

[@williamshumate5720]

“If you can’t fly then run. If you can’t run then walk. If you can’t walk then crawl. But whatever you have to do You have to keep moving forward.” Martin Luther King Jr.

[@ozonethegreat6948]

You got it! He definitely moved forward with a lot of women, just not his wife ;)

[@fredstanley5758]

Thank you, John for the encouraging words! You are just a Regular Dude but that’s what makes you special to so many of us. You don’t portray yourself as anything other than what you are which shows us that we can do it too. Just by being that Regular Dude you’re such an inspiration and mentor to me. I am honored to know you and call you my friend! ~Fred

[@manny4445]

We moved to WV when I was 13 yrs old. Came from a big city lived in a very nice house. Fell on hard times and Mother wanted to move to her hometown to be closer to her family. We had an outhouse, rain barrels, cook stove and an old ringer washer. We gathered kindling in the woods behind our house, raised a garden, built a chicken coop with found lumber. It was the hardest time of my life but also the best time. My Gramps taught me about medicinal plants, and how to work hard. It gave me character to know, if I had to I could be self-reliant. When we found out our son had Muscular Dystrophy, it was another of those moments where you dig your heals in and get with it. You have no other choice! Mother Teresa once said, ""I know God will not give me anything I can't handle. I just wish that He didn't trust me so much."

[@AmerijamAcres]

As someone who has had three different life changing events I can say the best advice you gave was to not get into a depression. DO NOT WALLOW IN SELF PITY. I wasted several years doing that when injuries ruined my military career. It was devastating and I made it worse by allowing myself to sink into terrible depression. When my wife dies after the birth of our son 19 months ago I refused to do that again! She was gone. I couldn’t change that. I have a newborn to care for plus a three year old as well as a teenager. I could not let the depression take root. That was the most important thing. If I let depression take over things would only get worse and my children are the ones who would suffer for it. I could not let that happen. Focus an something positive! No matter how bad it is there is always something positive. Find that and focus on it. That will get you through the worst times. Now that doesn’t mean it was easy. It was the most devastating thing I ever experienced. And that’s bad when thinking what I’ve been through. There will be nights filled with tears and mourning. Let that happen. Just don’t let it consume you. God bless Good video.

[@moonlitedaze5688]

AMEN....thank you sir

[@lynhanna917]

I am so sorry for your loss. When things got tough I write in a gratitude journal three things I am grateful for each day, it may be as minor as my coffee was hot (some days it took alot to find something to be grateful for) this worked for the kids too.

[@RA-zl6iw]

" I have often been broke, but I've never been poor. Poor is a state of mind."

[@joshdownie2521]

Just wanted to say thanks for making this video. I lost my job recently and even though I've been knocked on my butt plenty of times it's been hard. You're the kind of regular guy that reminds me I can make it if I keep pushing. I'm very thankful I happened to run into this video tonight. Happy Thanksgiving to everybody!

[@virginiareid5336]

I love your using "LCE". I have been faced with one now that I retired. I had already paid my debts way down; however an LCE forced me back to my cards. Now I'm trying to get them back down lower. I have learned so much from you and Mrs. Bev about bread, canning, and making enough to freeze. My chili and other recipes make a five quart kettle full. Cutting it in half never tastes right. So, just before retirement , I bought a small freezer I could pay cash for. I've learned to freeze the overages and stretch these meals,. Thank you and Mrs. Bev for all you have taught me...God Bless

[@joziemolody3592]

When caring for a loved one 24/7 I'd have to add that the caregiver needs to be kind and forgiving to themselves. Every once in a while you might have an argument or get angry with the sick person. The guilt can be terrible. You need to let that go. No one starts out perfect nor does caring for someone automatically make you perfect. We took care of grandmother with Alzheimer's. I completely get the need to be with someone 24/7 and how draining that can be. Forgive yourself and take a break once in a while if you can. Just a day makes a world of difference

[@jeanettewaverly2590]

Regular dudes like you make the world a better place.

[@amydavis8350]

I just love the way you look at life and the great example we can all follow.

[@FullSpectrumSurvival]

Sometimes people have oh crap moments far too often for comfort. Great advice to getting through.

[@tammymurphy1268]

FullSpectrumSurvival. yes few to many for me lately..wowza

[@danmcdonald1202]

Thanks for the inspiration! You exactly right tough times don't last but tough people do. God bless.

[@moonlitedaze5688]

Great advice John.....so many of us do not understand repurposing items when we can. No one ever taught them. I love the thrifty tips from you and others.....please keep them coming! I lost 2 of my 3 children due to a family disease....I wish they had outlived me...a parent should not outlive their children. But I did and here I still am, Thanks to the Good Lord getting me thru the LCE's . Thanks for all you share. God bless you and your family and friends.

[@Ladythyme]

Peacefulness or contentment is just a matter of perspective...one can either sulk in self pity or find the little light through the closed doorway and slide your way through... I’m glad you found the light...Many Blessings

[@danfraser7479]

John I went thru this LCE in 1999. I have not been able to work in all that time. My wife worked till 2003 and her health failed. It was hard because I am in a power chair. I finally got ssd as did my wife. that helps but it takes creative financing to make it work. It is 19 years later and we are debt free and not broke the second day of the month. God was good to us and we give him all the praise. thanks for sharing your story.

[@cherylknight8239]

Hard times shows us what we're made of. Been going through it for the last 2 years. Best lesson of my life.

[@tfr51]

John, your truly a good man and inspiration. God bless you.

[@inthestyx8726]

The sweetness of victory will never be tasted without the bitterness of failure.

[@appalachiashomesteadwithpatara]

And this is why people love you and your channel. It's REAL. Thank you, John! 👊

[@adavis9665]

God bless you for the knowledge thank you

[@jeannemiller306]

Thanks for the encouraging coffee chat

[@rosemarie741]

God bless you and your family too, John.

[@bkinney2109]

Thank you for your honesty.... We all go thru hard times & sometimes you need too take a few deep breathes and figure out a plan.

[@bbcustomoutdoors]

A positive attitude and unwillingness to give up are nearly impossible to beat. Great video. God bless you and your family!

[@djay3104]

Nice video! Your humility and positive words are super qualities!

[@BlessedFarm]

Amen brother all are great ideas more family time and NO electronics. GOD IS GOOD

[@rlbgardener6465]

Very well said my friend, i was 51 years old when i my life changing experience, and little over 2 1/2 years ago i had heart surgery i can't work anymore and still in the depression and angry stage because I can't be in extreme temperature so I'm stuck inside a lot, but I'm still trudging along. Thanks for the words of encouragement and god bless you and yours.

[@lynhanna917]

you are being hit with a double whammy - major surgery and the depression that comes just from having surgery, interesting fact people who have heart surgery can also suffer from depression as a result of the surgery (so that is double depression) and no longer working - that in itself can cause you to be depressed and angry. Hang in there it does get better.

[@davemcavene]

Well said Jnull. Everyone experiences life changing events, it's all about how you handle it and come out on the other side. Tough times build character. Always have a plan no matter what.

[@jodysappington7008]

nice seeing ya again...thank you for sharing....

[@thecatdaddyexperience1222]

You’re a great man. I totally enjoy when you talk about how you made it through your “LCE”. This is something everyone needs to know how to dampen the blow of. You need to write a “LCE” book. I’d buy it

[@theronrobinson9632]

I had a major LCE. To be specific I suffered 5 strokes. I had done well in life and was a software engineer for 33 years. Well needless to say our life changed in one day also. I like you fish and that is about all that I do. Now I do cook some and can get around well. I just cannot write software any longer. I used to bass fish but can no longer stand up all day and cast. I took the huge paycut and retired early. So a bunch of what you talk about we have been thru. We are very blessed . I currently live in a townhouse near Dallas but I want to get out of town and get rabbits and maybe other livestock. Thank you so much for sharing. It is very lonely when folks look at you and think you are fine but you are far from fine. God Bless you and I am a regular dude who will be praying for you.

[@reneebrown5598]

What you have said is so honest.I've been disabled since 2012. Still haven't quite got my disability started. Partly my fault for the wait. I tried my hardest to keep working but I couldn't keep my balance and was in extreme pain. I finally filed for disability in 2014. So I understand exactly what you are speaking of. I've learned what I can live without and how to save money in so many ways. This year I'm starting my garden. I've had a lot of plants in pots but now I'm ready to put in a raises bed so I can garden from chair or wheelchair. Sometimes the hardest times can be the worst times or the best times. It just depends on how you think of things. Keeping an open mind and analytical problem solving save the day and knowing that you will survive will keep your mental health. Otherwise you will drive yourself crazy.

[@WildAboutBeingOutdoors]

Great video !! I am disabled do to a traffic accident and my wife and I know exactly what you are saying. That O SHIT moment came 2\20\2016... And waiting for disability sucks. We finally got a hearing Feb.8. We need this !!! Send prayers

[@mikewoods897]

Thanks for sharing your life changing event testimony and how you made it threw. Great advice on stretching those pennies. May the Lord continue to bless you and your family and continue to fill you all with His peace and joy that surpasses all understanding. Bless you brother.

[@andyd.1793]

Great to listen to your coffee chat while I have my afternoon coffee here.

[@GriffinBenchmark]

Always look forward to your coffee chats! Tough times come for all. No avoiding it! It's always nice to know that we all have each other and we're all in this race together. God bless my KZbin brother!

[@bearfootinkitchn]

Thank you for sharing your knowledge and experience. May our dear Lord continue to bless you and your family.

[@daddyosink4413]

Everyone preps food, water, first aid, etc.... but they overlook "entertainment" When things are bad, you need to be able to take a mental break from "the suck" to keep your sanity. I always make sure to have decks of cards and some dice in all of my preps, friends make fun of me, but you have to keep your humanity whether it is a snow storm or the zombie apocalypse.

[@greywindLOSP]

Back when I was a wee lad me Granddad told me you're going to step in dog shit now & then, he said you can worry and wipe & scrap and wipe & smear and get upset that it won't come off, or he said set them aside let it dry and it will fall off & blow away, sit down and think about it life is the same way! Well done sir!.........ATB!

[@darrellblake799]

You are indeed a motivational speaker.

[@nearlyorganicnoshing2798]

I really enjoy your honest, to the point, way of doing things. My dad has Parkinson's, that has progressed very quickly. It has opened our eyes, to being prepared, and pulling yourself up, and moving forward. I think, you are a pretty amazing "regular guy". Thanks for your advice, and wisdom.

[@lindakinsman6215]

Thank you and God bless you, that was very inspirational.

[@muddyacres9334]

"I get knocked down, but I get up again....never gonna keep me down" and repeat!.......God bless you too, John.

[@66mustang15]

GRT ADVICE JOHN...THANK YOU

[@PRINCESSDREAMYLYN]

great advice ... It's true if you improvise when ever life happens, it's the only way to survive this world I've done it many times over in very different situations. it's like passing a test it's not the event it's if you pass the test still standing on your feet that counts. Common Sense goes along ways too.

[@rutten69]

Thank you!!! God Bless !

[@dreamweaver3676]

Thanks For The Awesome Coffee Chat !!! :-)

[@andrewmacphee6676]

From Canada...... Wise words brother. Had a LCE recently and we circled the wagons! Each day things get a bit better. God bless you, your family and America!

[@ohiooutlaw4598]

As my momma always said you just have to look at problems and just remind yourself that problems never last forever, it'll always get better eventually by the end of it all

[@mikemagnum7987]

John, you put this in a pretty good nutshell my friend! Yeah, I've been through some pretty tough times in my life to! I have to say though that GOD never left me in a spot where there was no way forward! He always left a lit path..... Frustration, anger and sometimes fear may have caused temporary "blindness", but it was always there waiting to be discovered. Our Father will never test us beyond our means. Material things mean nothing when the chips are down. I recently went through an ordeal that took 2 1/2 years to get through due to the nature of how getting old, forced to retire due to medical problems and the workings of the SSI go...... I learned some things about myself that I had forgotten and I discovered the real value of patience. I got rid of virtually everything that owned and some of that stuff, I thought were things that I would never part with under any circumstance! I kept a close relationship with God during this time..... asking only for his guidance and gift of patience because at times, I just wasn't sure that I could make it on my own and I didn't want to be a burden. I tend to ramble on a bit..... My contribution here is a simple one really, if true hard times hit you out of the clear blue sky; grab your immediate family and love them like you have never loved them before! Get with your Father in Heaven and make things right with him if you need to, but make sure that you put Him in control of your recovery and endurance through the circumstances. Hold on tight and do not give up! You WILL be ok and WILL make it through to a bright and sunny tomorrow. To thine own heart, be true.....

[@IndiAcres]

Good advice. Thanks for sharing. God bless you.

[@gerrymarmee3054]

Good stuff. Hard times do happen

[@MrLouis79]

Good video. Thanks as always

[@HumbleVoyager]

My favorite quote from the Bible is, “And it came, to pass...” Everything will pass; the bad as well as the good. Just keep it moving. God bless you too, John.

[@loriannryder6274]

Thanks for sharing. Have a blessed day

[@kencampell625]

Thanks Jon for those words of wisdom learned from the school of hard knocks. Blessings to you and yours.

[@josephagamble8863]

That's hardcore buddy , thank the Lord you've done the right things to stay strong ...

[@josephagamble8863]

I've got Monopoly on Xbox lol

[@TheOriginalFreak]

LOL...The toilet think. "If it's yellow, let it mello, if its brown, flush it down!!"

[@pawpawshobbyhomestead4081]

Great advice to follow! Thanks for sharing!

[@SquiggySquog]

God bless you sir.

[@donnaweeks1311]

Thank you for sharing. Wonderful reminder on how to persevere.

[@theresa121075]

Bless you.. Thank you for this video.

[@terryeabbott7554]

As always John, your love and concern shows through and you have such a big heart. Great advice, and we have to remember to take it slow, don't rush into anything at that moment. God always has a plan for us.

[@cillaloves2fish688]

He speaks the truth...

[@nkyhomesteading6500]

Preach it brother! lol We are going through a tight spot this year. Work is starting to line up for the spring though and I'm sure we will pull through somehow. We decided last fall to pay off our house and land and left us with no savings at all. Was a risky move but eventually I'll feel good about it again.

[@lisaclairemont4842]

You are wonderful. Thank you for the encouragement. I think that more people, myself included, need to practice for hard times BEFORE they happen. That way it is not a kick in the gut when they do.

[@JohnJordan78]

In the middle of some hard times myself. Thanks for posting this.

[@colleenrodamer6230]

I got to say THANK U for sharing your life with us God bless y’all

[@lisabooker6405]

Very well said John. We just can’t ever give up. No matter what we have to push forward. TFS! God Bless you and yours ~Lisa

[@browndogdude5400]

Great speech from a "real" person! Well done!

[@ronhart8857]

Thank you John, very good video. I also hope Mary is doing better! I enjoyed watching her fishing in the summer!

[@anthonyfrizzell6159]

Thank you, very helpful. I believe everyone of us are going to have or have had a hard time. I appreciate your ideas for what to do when they do happen. God bless.

[@IAMSCOTLANDFOREVER]

Proud of ya brother God Bless

[@cichlidlover27]

You know I truthfully wish there were more people like John in this world it would be a much better place. I hope someday to meet up with him and maybe do some fishing. John appreciates everything and knows what it it's like to go through hard times. Great videos John I really enjoy them keep them coming.

[@grasshopper9449]

Thank you. Going through my own hard time now due to a MVA not my fault. Life changing event for sure. God Bless

[@larrybuehler6246]

Good advise John. As long as a man don't let his wants exceed his needs he will do all right. Sure do enjoy watching your videos. I admire your love for the Lord. He wont let you down. God bless you and your family.

[@abetterme1238]

My oh crap happened ten years ago when my doctors told me i would never walk or see again which made trucking cross country impossible. Eventually i did get my vision back thanks to God and i tought myself how to stand and walk at home. Ten years later and things are still rough but better than they were. Maybe some day i will have my own homestead. Im learning everything i can while in town. Hoping to move back east in the next few years. Dreams never end. They just changed😀

[@nanacarpenter7770]

Awesome talk..

[@amberlamb6708]

Yep I put god first and everything falls in place. We all deal with hard times.God bless you and your family.

[@kathleenblight5071]

Blessings sent your way for the whole families health and well-being. You do what you gotta do and don't worry about anything else...we will still be here *hugs*

[@dazie1245]

Very well put thank you

[@dannystrickland8674]

Brother you just told me something I didn't know that I've never realized life knocks you down just a reason to get up thank you God puts us all here for a reason and we go through everything for a reason watching this video you saying that it's a lot of things in my life in perspective thank you and God bless

[@terraspath2642]

Hey! Thanks.... That was just what I needed to hear right now! God Bless you too!

[@d-c-g6525]

Thank you for your encouraging words!

[@beckie0512]

very well said and also if you have less you learn to live with less, and it shows you that you really didnt need all that stuff anyways

[@traceyheadford9760]

Thanks jnull0 I'm so glad I found your channel. It's hard to see a way out when your in the middle of a storm and having channels like yours, that offer sound tried and tested advice really helps. God bless you and yours xx

[@princessleah341]

John, you are such an inspiration. God bless you!

[@gstrader73]

Amen...thanks brother.

[@tombob671]

You speak the truth, brother... I learned this from being in the Marines in 1966, ADAPT AND OVERCOME, AMEN

[@bettyadkisson1681]

You are such good person to teach all person's that haven't gone threw hard times. But I'm still learning every day. I'm the middle of 7 kids. With 3 children. And I still can and garden with one good hand. But with help from friends to can. You have a blessed day. Some times you all are what keeps me going.

[@carolyngaulin7822]

God has given you a special gift !

[@cheaphomesteading]

agree

[@smartfishing9094]

I understand this video and your sacrifices. The LCE's haven't stopped for us. A few years ago, we were hit by a tornado. Everything was destroyed. Two years later, I got burglarized so bad I lost two homes (one I was living in, trying to sell, one I was building) and had to file bankruptcy. At the time, they even stole my underwear I had packed up to make room during our build. We lost everything and my insurance used a loophole to avoid covering it. (We had Allstate for 15 years, no claims!) My credit rating fell and I lost my job working as a government subcontractor. I could not maintain my security clearance because of my credit. I went back to school, hoping to get a new job, maintained a 4.0 and earned a full ride scholarship to study mechanical and electrical engineering. After the stress and extreme downsizing, my wife had a stroke from the stress. She had her stroke on the day I was supposed to accept my new scholarship. She is with me and she is OK; however, she is not the same. Recently, I got so sick from genetic food intolerance (had no idea what it was) that I couldn't eat, sleep, or hold my train of thought for more than a minute or so. It was just a couple days ago learned that it was food that was making me sick. No matter how hard you work, it can be taken away in the blink of an eye. It doesn't matter if you are a good person and walk the line. My father is an alcoholic and my mother is a drug addict. I had no one to ask for help. Be grateful for what you have. Because even if you're the hardest working person in the room, it can be gone in a minute. I don't know anyone that tried as hard as we did. We were determined to claw our way up into the comfortable middle class. I went to get food assistance at one point. However, all they would look at was my previous years taxes. Therefore, I was told an able-bodied White-male in America has no business asking for food assistance. Even in emergencies. Regardless of what the news says, it sucks being White in America sometimes. Because when we suffer, everyone says it shouldn't happen and they blame us and ignore it. Be good to the people you pass on the street. You have no idea the load they carry.

[@MBFModernHomesteading]

God Bless you John! We have had a few LCE's. In fact going through one now with Jeremy's medical release from the military. Ya just gotta keep on keepin on I guess. You're awesome by the way.

[@stevetaylor9415]

You do what you have to do to get by. keep calm and carry on.. All the best from Scarborough in the UK

[@dannash831]

love your homesteading, and fishing vids. hopefully we will see a new homesteading vid soon.

[@vangazmicvoyage5077]

Amen brother! Last year my brain damaged son and I finally got priced out of the rental market in the Boston area so we had to give up the apartment and move into an old van. But we have stable incomes, low incomes but stable. At least for now but God only knows what devious plans those politicians have to gut social security, medicare, and medicaid. I'm retired and receiving social security retirement and my son gets disability. I had the skills, tools, and knowledge to turn the van into habitable space and we're surviving a New England winter without too much discomfort. The money we are saving on rent and utilities is over a thousand dollars a month. Soon we'll have enough money to buy a nicer van with a high top and extended body for greater comfort and we'll be able to spend next winter in Arizona. Its not as hard as people may think to strip your life down to a more minimalist lifestyle and the sense of security it brings cannot be measured in dollars. No landlord, no rent, no neighbors, mobility is liberty. I have a KZbin channel under this name where I am documenting our transition to van dwelling, I hope you will visit us there. You have a beautiful piece of property out there in the country and you can probably cultivate or hunt food for yourself. I own a little piece of heaven on earth in northern Maine and there's nothing quite like that privacy, solitude, and peace with nature that you cannot achieve in the city. God bless, I have confidence you will pull through the hard times to better times ahead.

[@donmafu365]

GOD Bless You and Yours. Thank you for sharing this message. Kindest Regards

[@usageorgepa.3293]

Hard times,,Always got thru them some easier that others..I found acceptance of what is and stopped wishing for what was,and I must say that thought always popped up,just made a conscious effort to push it away. One foot in front of the other,eyes on the road ahead and just keep walking..Things change maybe not for the liking but I don't know any alternative to life. I do know things like wishing for what is no more and hiding in a bottle only makes things worse.. I'm with you brother....TY for sharing your experiences.

[@susieawalt7416]

Blessing to you and your family

[@bigh650]

good ideas - all the best