Awful Player Gets Revenge On A Terrible DM Part 1 || D&D Story

Petty Player Vs Incompetent Idiot CIVIL WAR
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[@gilgamike3164]

An unstoppable force meets an immovable object

[@wierdpeopleotherdude1422]

And then don’t forget all the gods observing this war

[@Gamer88334]

The ground beneath your feet shudders!

[@lspuria8440]

Thor's hammer vs Captain America's shield.

[@yog-sherkoth1782]

One punch man vs superman

[@justsomeguywholikeswater3566]

Roll for rip in the space time continuum

[@privatizitat815]

The only thing making op a good person is the self awareness. He knows he's awful, he knows it's petty, but the DM actually seems like some kind of psychopath.

[@MartinBlackArcano]

As good as a gritty, grimdark early 90s antihero can get.

[@1Kapuchu100]

That is the one factor that makes it something I can stomach. OP knows he's being an asshole, and feels bad about it.

[@demonsforge1391]

. That's pretty much the saving grace isn't it? It would be way worse if he was being shitty and thought he wasn't!

[@Necrotaku999]

meh at least its doing a good, id say this would qualify as lawfull evil but even if he is doing it because selfish reasons he its saving those guys from a completely awfull DM

[@demonsforge1391]

@@Necrotaku999 maybe chaotic, leaning towards chaotic good. He is looking to save the good over the evil, not completely ruin everything and everyone for his own goals

[@eee04]

Well, atleast OP is aware that his actions are petty, and not trying to write himself as the hero of the story.

[@truckwarrior5944]

Well, not really. While he said it was petty he then continued to try to portrait himself as the one dethroning a tyrant. Seems more like he inserted a small "it is petty" sentence after he wrote his hero-fantasy.

[@dozensofknives9104]

@@truckwarrior5944 That's still better than other bad players.

[@DemonKing19951]

@@truckwarrior5944 I will say that from his wording I'm getting the sense he knows he's wrong. He just doesn't like the other person enough that he doesn't care. I know a few people who base the morality of a situation on how much they like a person and it's always fun to trip them up by not including who was involved in a situation.

[@truckwarrior5944]

@@DemonKing19951 not sure I get the same Impression. Through out the whole story he tries to portrait himself as a villain, except for that once. He even tries to portrait the DM as someone who does not know the rules, just demonstrating that he himself did not read the rules even after that confrontation. He tries to appear like the hero freeing other players from the tyranny of a bad DM, even though in passing he mentioned that the other players liked the game the way it was a lot. He literally does not even mind contradicting himself (like when he said the DM did not talk to them before the game but then insisting he knew about his D&D experience in detail as soon as the game starts). He feels morally right cause he dislikes the other person and felt the need to destroy that group because he could not accept that other people could be moly something different than him.

[@oscaratriano8534]

@UC3HrJkBcLqawvnqUy8Z5xaw well he didn’t do it specifically to destroy the group, he did it because he thought the person was genuinely a bad person to be around (and his girlfriend getting sad cause the dm’s an egotistical cnt) and you can see in game where the dm is just a massive cnt to him and the players. He says himself that he was petty, explaining that he manipulated another player just for the purpose of getting back at the bloke. I agree it’s a bit dog to bring other people down into your situation but even though he came from a place of pettiness, what’s wrong with encouraging players to Dm their own games? It’s not like the dm was encouraging players in his games, he was just being gronks to them making them roll for everything making it slow as shit as well. All in all They’re both in the wrong, OP could’ve gone through a more diplomatic manner, and the DM being a genuine piece of shit.

[@links-gut-versifftergrunme1809]

Ah, yes. An exquisite dumpster fire to warm our human decency and which shines lights on the shit we should avoid brought upon us by the king of crabs. Thank you, crit.

[@bradyweed4124]

Isn’t there something so morally warming to watch evil destroy itself?

[@Eliphas_]

As a terrible DM, this is quite accurate.

[@drakoslayd]

Atleast you can get better with time. I'm just a new dm and player

[@tronche2cake]

terrible player here. Can confirm

[@Michi_no_Koka]

Hey admiting that yer terrible, means that you know you can improve.

[@fearlessdrago21]

Terrible person here I also agree it’s accurate

[@wierdpeopleotherdude1422]

Terrible existence here can confirm

[@intboom]

A party that doesn't have a single member that knows Identify? Not gonna lie, that sounds like one "experienced" bunch. No wonder they stuck with Oldboy for so long, they probably didn't realise how awful he was being.

[@chadsmith8966]

Yeah, sounds like a bunch of first timers. Makes me feel bad for the other players.

[@generalledger3353]

Agree. My guess is that Oldboy has been their only and forever GM for ages, and in their early campaigns he discouraged the use of Identify or modified it into uselessness. So that it became a dreaded forgotten spell in the group's eyes. Something like: "You said when I cast Identify on the sword, it was a Singing Sword." "No, I said you THINK it is a Singing Sword. You rolled a 10 on your spell check, so you miscast it and got bad info. It's actually a STINGING Sword, so every time you swing it, the handle stings you for 2d8 damage. No save." That would also explain why they never experimented with their gear.

[@basedeltazero714]

​@@generalledger3353 There's the other alternative of always having NPC casters to do it for you, which by RAW is the better option: At least as of 3.X The material component is so expensive that the small fee (10 GP) to get someone to cast it for you isn't that big a deal, given that it frees up an early spell slot to spend on something else. Of course, a scroll of Identify isn't that expensive either (125 gp). (A wand is a huge one-time expense, by contrast). Though that definitely didn't seem to happen here. (There's the other other option of the GM not bothering and all items coming 'pre identified') Also since Oldboy *did* let them use identify well enough, just felt he needed to punish them for having magic items (which, okay, unlike 3.X, 5E isn't designed with the Christmas Tree in mind, so raising difficulty if players have lots of magic items is fair, but... eugh), the players had done this before and seen that it didn't help them.

[@truckwarrior5944]

Well he was not awful. OP literally admits that the other players have fun with Oldboy as DM. They enjoy the way he dms, so he is a good DM for them.

[@generalledger3353]

@@basedeltazero714 True, but if Oldboy is adding spell component requirements to spells that don't have them in RAW, I would not be surprised if he didn't up the cost, or put up other barriers, to NPC spell casting. It'd be pretty easy to say "The only wizard in town that knows Identify is the Court Sorcerer and he's not taking appointments." Regardless of the tools at their disposal to do so, the group viewed figuring out what the magic items did as more of a bane than a boon.

[@Samuraiedge2]

I'm honestly a bit surprised other people in the store or even the workers didn't seem concerned about the DM, at the top of his lungs, threatened to slash people's tires.

[@iglidor]

Its a thing. If you play with someone for years, you will overlook things for which you would immiditealy kick newer member of the group. Even when everyone acknowledges that that person is awfull, they will still go along with it instead of stomping their feet. Had similiar friend/player years ago. He started playing with us during high school, where we regulary met for 2 hours after school to play a bit. Since it was only for short whiles, the gameplay was not that much serious. But after two years we started playing more seriously, making all day long sessions over weekends etc. and there nasty habits of that player surfaced in full. Bit of cheating with dice, always boosting his stats, equipment and abilities way beyond rules (we ussualy used point-buy systems and he regulary used like double the points he should have), combining things that rules explicitely forbade and in the end even outright making his own extremely OP stuff. I think the crown was his made-up feat that gave him +6 to strength, +4 to vitality and -2 to charisma. Gave him that ability where you can fight on even with 0 health and also gave him basic Cleave. All this in single feat. And he did not run this by DM. He simply made this up and aplied it to his character (which was Ogre Fighter) without telling anyone. Of course very soon we noticed that his char is weirdly OP so when DM checked his sheet he was astonished. Outside of bagfull of other rulebreaking stuff in it (like 4 more feats then he should have) this really took the cake. When DM confronted him about his insane feat, his explenation was that he did not run his made up feat by Gm because he felt that that feat was well balanced. That all those good things were balanced by fact that it gave -2 to charisma and by fact that that feat (which he made up specificaly for his character) is limited only to Ogres. You can not make this stuff up. Second most outrageous thing was when we played Shadowrun (Think cyberpunk but with magic along technology) with point buy system. We had homerule that you can use your points to buy more then one character, but you would not get more points for them obviously (so with 400 points you could buy for 50 points average nobody with no significant skills, no magic and no equipment or contacts.). His result was that he created four characters, all with good skills and abilities and contacts and gave them EACH way more equipment than what you could get with single character who maxed his money. I took it personally and calculated that he used up almost 2500 points for that. And he did not find anything wrong with it.

[@Samuraiedge2]

@@iglidor Daaaammmmn. First story is why I tend to stay away from homebrew feats.

[@lliamthrumble]

Its almost like he never said it and OP just made it up

[@_maliciousIntent]

​@@lliamthrumble OP did not make it up.

[@rossjohnstone4689]

More drama betrayal manipulation and backstabbing than the KZbin fashion community? Thems fighting words critcrab

[@obsidian1612]

He's not wrong.

[@rossjohnstone4689]

@@obsidian1612 I never said he was, just saying thats a tough thing to prove X3

[@obsidian1612]

@@rossjohnstone4689 Not really. The dnd/ TTRPG community as a whole is not perfect, just like any another community, the Dnd community has its own sets of problems and drama. It's just not present in as large of a scale, or as popular as the fashion/ make up communities, which has been quite as of the time of writing this, in addition it's only big figure heads such as make up youtubers that initiate said drama. While, Dnd is more prone to drama within the community itself due to its context and the types of people that play the game, dnd players are very different from fashion/ make-up enthusiasts.

[@sea_triscuit7980]

The only time I have a problem with players is when they try to exploit loopholes in the rules to make their character superhuman at early levels. Then just finish an encounter in one go. Meta players ruin d&d because they aren't using the imagination aspect of the game and just want high stats and hit rolls all day. Their character barely speaks in roleplay areas and when they're asked anything they go murder hobo.

[@alexandrews6256]

@@sea_triscuit7980 I have nothing against Min Maxers. They find fun in big numbers and have a dopamine rush for beating strong encounters. Now I will say that it isn't fun when they aren't invested in story, roleplay or anything else in the game but high damage. I actually Min Max to an extent myself, but while I do so, I also make myself flawed in gameplay and roleplay. I usually play fighters, so high Strength and Con and usually highest armor class, because I chose to be the Tank of the party. However, while I am the Tank, I also love the moments where I'm forced to use my low stats, like my Charisma, Dexterity and Intelligence. It was fun being caught by a maid, and using the fact that I was a Knight from where I lived as an excuse to meet the Lady of the house. Later I had to knock out the same exact maid, cause the Lady was batshit insane, and I specified it was non lethal... so I nearly rolled a Crit (18, I was playing a Champion fighter, I get crits on 19s) and I had to medical check her before getting the fuck out. That was fun. That Strahd Campaign sadly didn't finish.

[@Pundae]

This is like watching a horror movie where the main characters all decide to take a vacation in the haunted forest. Very easily avoidable, potentially dangerous, but also where's my popcorn?

[@gecko2.617]

it is much like an accident: it is horrible and gets worse but you can't "not watch" 😅

[@xuan.1611]

I feel its more like watching someone blow up a pile shits. Its stupid, it’s disgusting, its smelly but damn would it be entertaining to watch. From a safe distance far away to even smell it.

[@poisonousmushroom5183]

But instead of the average main character, it's Reboot Dante. Can't say if it's better or not.

[@1337motif]

Dude crit failed an IRL perception check to catch the DM being snooty and condescending to his girlfriend, smh...!

[@nerovalentine865]

More like he had low passive perception

[@robertcajucom3203]

@@nerovalentine865 gotta min/max u know amiright?

[@funnyvalentine6360]

To get multiple crit fails like that... oof

[@ghekj]

I mean, how? How do you not notice that kind of shit happening at your table?

[@Orloft]

@@ghekj I'd guess because there were 10 people in the room.

[@pointynoodle]

"Are you going to take it?" Oldboy looked at me with eyes glowing in anticipation. "Nah." lmfao

[@georgewiggins7271]

I had my own horror story a few weeks ago. DM: Alright guys, Easter Sunday. No game tonight.

[@Konpekikaminari]

I just wanna point something minor out The whole "handing out magic items without telling it's magic" is like, one of, if not the most childish move I've heard of

[@THEPELADOMASTER]

Aren't I smart? I know all the items they have, they're all OP magic items and my players don't even know! *childish laugh* Honestly, what's the point? Feeling smarter than the players? Of course they're not gonna know they're magical if you don't even hint at it slightly.

[@truckwarrior5944]

@@THEPELADOMASTER The point is fun? Doing it like that is actually fun for quite some people, which is why that was in the rules on how to run it for multiple editions and even adviced.

[@eddoh2701]

This video became quickly: Oath of vengeance Paladin going HAM

[@HojuMedia]

DM: Makes puzzle Also DM: Ooooh MY character knows the answer to the puzzle

[@robbygomez9966]

“Finally a worthy opponent, our battle will be legendary!”

[@nailin18]

Oh man, this guy is my hero. Most stories where that guy is the DM are about players giving the DM too many opportunities to take things too far and never standing up for themselves or just leaving, but this is the first that I see the player coming for the DM with a vengeance, good stuff.

[@firockfinion3326]

Yeah I wouldn't say OP is a faultless paragon either, but I definitely take his side over the DM's, at least from what's presented here.

[@jesternario]

That wasn’t nearly as bad as I thought it was going to be. It was almost entertaining, in a sadistic revenge fantasy sort of way.

[@DoctorMagoo111]

I'm not sure I'd have the patience to do what OP is doing, but I can't fault him for it. Maybe it is a bit petty, but hopefully he gets the other players out of the bad situation they are in with this weird DM.

[@priestshrek3738]

The true fight of the ages.

[@PUNishment777]

Yes, comrade 🙌

[@priestshrek3738]

@@PUNishment777 indeed brother

[@TindraSan]

"terrible accident" that's an ominous way to cut in the story O_O *OP, wearing a revealing night gown and a flowing, feathery night robe:* Oh, I don't have a single clue, officer~ I'd just woken up this morning to find my dear husband, Oldboy, DEAD at the bottom of the stairs! I am so devastated, oh, I think I might faint~

[@ianlawrence1576]

I had a situation where there were too many players in my campaign. I made room, adjusted the plot, and in the end, it actually worked out.

[@georgia4706]

My old dm has same situation. She was amazing.

[@morehbein6207]

A DM I once had got us into a situation in which we split into two opposing groups. That way we had separate sessions with only five people instead of one with ten. It worked out great

[@Jaaaannnneeee]

How does this dude’s gf feel about all this?? Does she know? I feel like she’d have to know, and be on board

[@TBaker-xu5is]

In comments the OP replied that the first time she came, was the last time she played with that group. She found another group to play in . A quote from him in a reply post: "My gf left after session 1, and found her own groups - one as a DM and one as a player. Though when D&D is cancelled and a few of us want to hang out in a small group to play boardgames or something, she will sometimes tag along..." There is more in the post, but I will not put it here because it will give away the ending, since it is from part 4 of the story.

[@Jaaaannnneeee]

@@TBaker-xu5is that’s good that she found her own groups! Hopefully they don’t talk down to her. I guess I meant like, does she know about her boyfriend’s revenge quest lmao

[@thomastegroen1274]

She'd have to know, right? Op says he told her he was going back every week after she said she was put down by Oldboy.

[@SlyLilFoxo]

I hope at least OP mentioned the Tomb of Annihilation campaign and offered it to her.

[@DaxterL]

i think petty on OPs lvl is something that is ok in my book. As long as no real harm comes, be petty as you want. This was beautiful.

[@truckwarrior5944]

Well he deliberately tries to crash a round that went well and the players all enjoyed (as he had admitted)

[@SlyLilFoxo]

It was vengeance for his girlfriend and to try and save the other players. To be honest, I don't think what he did was bad.

[@haleyspence]

@@SlyLilFoxo Yeah, imo as long as the players are still having fun at the end of the day, nothing worth losing sleep over. Maybe just buy the pizza every few weeks lol

[@APerson-ws4cw]

@@SlyLilFoxo he was bad, but not THAT bad all things considered

[@erindunn6689]

The Chinese word for contradiction uses the characters for “shield” and “spear” respectively. It comes from an old story about a merchant who claimed to sell shields that can block spears and spears that can shatter shields. One bystander asks him what would happen if one of his shields and one of his spears met. I think this story just gave us the answer.

[@destroidhak2556]

I think that the OP is right here. I am a vengeful person myself, and, man, this guy TOTALLY deserved the trollege. And it was the best kind of trollege.

[@tronche2cake]

le epic trollg

[@Ashtari]

I don’t know, he’ll have to step up his game if he wants to hit Old Man Henderson levels of trollage.

[@ulrichbrodowsky5016]

You see, obviously the DM is a bad DM, but he may or may not be a bad person. But more to the point, OP dragged all the other players into this with him. They certainly didn't deserve that

[@Parasolhyena]

@@ulrichbrodowsky5016 Hmm I dunno, the dude did say he'd start slashing tires, might make him a little bit of a bad person if he follows through. (it could have been a joke of course but we're just getting one side of the story)

[@risottopose9970]

@@anjafrohlich1170 It sounds like these people were first time players, possibly been with this DM for a long time. This is in no way their faults

[@turtlehub2731]

Man, people in these horror stories must have PTSD after all of this BS.

[@brunop.8745]

bad players/DMs are the number 1 cause of people quitting the hobby, sadly

[@Carbadonia]

As a person who has lived through a year's worth of similar stories, yes.

[@rararasputin8608]

Diagnosis? Craig, who is said to have more experience... has main protag syndrome. It's a very gray zone.

[@c6rn6g2k1d]

The fact that there are jackass neckbeards in the ttrpg community that make anime fans and anime in general look bad would give *me* ptsd.

[@asagoldsmith3328]

Yes, yes we do.

[@frost68nskate]

Honestly thats a pretty kickass way of introducing new players. Traped on the island the players just got to who were on a mission but got attacked. Like thats both believable and fits the story.

[@Aspensauce64]

Moral of the story: experience does not mean someone is good at the game, much less that they are compassionate and understanding when it comes to being a DM.

[@truckwarrior5944]

Well the DM is good though. OP admitted that the Players all had fun and liked returning to Oldboys games. That is what makes a good DM, nothing else. OP did not like the playstyle all the other players enjoyed, that does not mean Oldboy is a bad DM, that just means that OP does not fit in the group.

[@THEPELADOMASTER]

@@truckwarrior5944 gotta say, handing out magic items without even a hint that they're magic items is pretty assholey. And when they find out they're magic items you get pissy and say "well, guess I'll have to increase the difficulty". So is forcing you to have the actual spell components (with no value). A wizard can start with an arcane focus. Fuck your spell components. Adding components to spells that don't have them seems like a way to limit what your players can do. Having an OP DMPC that can solve the puzzle you just invented, come on, how asinine can it get? A 50lb brass brazier to cast find familiar??!

[@thomastegroen1274]

@@THEPELADOMASTER Especially when it's a class feature that you're supposed to get. Holy hell.

[@Explosive_Pineapple4124]

On this day, the Crab Army is witness to the Second Blood War.

[@nickieBurke]

as Craig's tombstone rattled, we realized what was happening it was time for another war

[@hixel1268]

I just started watching CritCrab, _what in the goddamn fuck happened that required a first Blood War?!?!?_

[@nickieBurke]

@@hixel1268 oh, young crustacean, he is a foul beast, a creature of darkness and rage in an of itself. It's name is...... craig.

[@hixel1268]

@@nickieBurke Wow ok

[@Explosive_Pineapple4124]

@@hixel1268 Put on your AC 18 plate armor, say your prayers to whatever god you serve, and study your spell book. For a dark evil lies hidden within the tomes of the crab lore; a demonic tomes speak of the great devourer. If you are not prepared, then perhaps its strength will too much. But worry not, for thousands of crabs have gone before you and won the fight. Follow our mighty king into battle, and you will be triumphant! Long live the crab army!!

[@IMXLegedaryBard]

This story made me look up how thunder wave works.....I cannot believe the years as a player and dm that I had this wrong the whole time

[@stammesbruder]

Thunderclap is centered on yourself - you clap, and the vibrations go all around. Thunderwave is in front of you - you push it away, creating a wave. That's how I remember.

[@IMXLegedaryBard]

@@stammesbruder no reading it now I realized I messed up. I always thought thunderwave was like force repulse, where you're blasting enemies back!

[@truckwarrior5944]

@@stammesbruder Thunderwave can include you if you want it to. It's a kinda wonky rule in D&D when it comes to cones. You as caster can choose about the cone including or not including yourself.

[@espio87]

Ah, a classic "Pay evil unto evil" story. They never cease to amuse.

[@ricknaturalls2065]

"Avengers Civil War." Captain America- Am I a joke to you?

[@christopherlie3590]

Smh, Civil War was just an Avengers movie without Thor

[@risottopose9970]

@@christopherlie3590 Hulk: “Am I a Joke to You?”

[@akl2k7]

@@christopherlie3590 True, it was basically Avengers 2.5 as opposed to a Captain America movie.

[@Blackferret66]

I have an experience similar in which a DM let players in, but didn't want to, and made playing the game hell. In my freshman year at college, I joined the school's gaming club. I couldn't find any game except a very large D+D group. During my brief time, I discovered that the game had it's core clique, and the DM only let in other people because the club required DMs to be welcoming to new members. I made my character, and was introduced to the group's leader, a dwarf. As an elf, I made a snarky, but friendly, jab as a greeting. The dwarf's player informed me that he was a prince (nothing of the sort was told to me to indicate that) and that I should just go away. I had my character hang around in the background and listen in on their plans as a way of trying to be included in the game that was not intrusive, hoping to be let in eventually. Instead, the dwarf and his entourage which were the core clique, had me grabbed, thrown into a cell with some infamous "anti-ranger" from the game's history, who proceeded to kill my character. This was played out in combat, while the dwarf's player and his friends gleefully laughed and cheered my character's murderer on. Being a young, socially awkward guy who just wanted to play a game, I made another character and just blended into the background until I died again by a trap in the first adventure. The good news is, after that, I met a small group running a different game who let me and and they were some of the best players and future friends I had in college.

[@YouW00t]

I love how had Oldboy not patronized OP's girlfriend, none of this would had happened.

[@aydan8535]

IKR. Also like how OP downplays the fact that he doesn't believe girls need special treatment but then goes out of his way to get revenge for her despite not actually wanting to go back.

[@stammesbruder]

@@aydan8535 Equivocation, man. He was saying that girls don't need to be treated special, but that doesn't mean that he can't or shouldn't treat his partner specially. Also, he was annoyed that oldboy treated everyone bad at the table - his girl especially so. It was petty revenge not just for her, but for everyone who had the displeasure of playing with him.

[@truckwarrior5944]

I love how it is basically the GF not knowing the most common Joke in the D&D community. "It's the one with the 20 on it." and variations of that is not him insulting her, that is just a joke so common i've at least heared it a thousand times since i play 5e. And that was the strongest example of Oldboy beeing mean to GF that OP had.

[@YouW00t]

@@truckwarrior5944 OP is petty, he admits it himself. Still, Oldboy was not a cool dude, if it wasn't OP it'd had been someone similar or worse in the long run.

[@truckwarrior5944]

@@YouW00t Why is he not a cool dude? He just plays in a different style from OP. And more important: He plays in a way that his players enjoy. OP admits that the other players had fun and thats why they come back to Oldboy. That is very cool

[@spectralumbra1568]

Reroll is pretty cool, I've used it before. I wish they had more free options for character customization, what they have available is very limited, but the character sheet aspects of it are very nice.

[@celihenry3227]

I just want anything I can make an ettercap on

[@Arcticmaster1190]

Ngl, OP knows this is stupid for the first two parts. He is not pretending to be the good guy in this situation. And I can definitely see him seeing that this path to petty revenge is... dumb. That aside, looking forward to the dumpster fire that will be the next two parts/next video.

[@redstoneraptor8101]

Huh. I always thought Thunderwave was centered on the player that cast it, but because it “originated” from them, it didn’t effect them. I didn’t realize the spell allows you to be on the corner of that area of effect for maximum potential. I wonder how many other spells are worded like that.

[@ChurchAtNight]

Been playing too long when my first thought to this whole story was “Hah, an Illithid in the Shadowfell.”

[@jimmyteeling737]

It's always a good day when CritCrab uploads

[@spectralumbra1568]

I'm pretty sure I've heard a story similar to this one before with a castaway setting. I think more than one of the players might have complained about the DM in an rpg horror story, this setting sounds just too similar to the other one I heard.

[@blasterboy123456]

Sometimes firefighters have to start the fires To stop even bigger fires

[@SirDavid290]

I heard making holes in big holes closes the hole, instead of making a bigger hole.

[@alexandrews6256]

So far OPs actions haven't been that bad. I mean, he is intentionally screwing with the DM, but right now it looks like he's trying to give his party tools just to actually function as a party... Now I don't know the full story yet, and I know you can manipulate people to seem like an angel with a Devil standing right in front of you that seems to cause more harm, while you're entirely terrible as well. I'm just saying, from this point he is aware and doesn't seem that bad.

[@pointynoodle]

I went to different areas of the map, watched him take half an hour pulling out the maps and monsters he was going to use to try and kill us, then immediately said "Nah this looks tough, let's go to the other place." That was fun. Aahahahahahahhahahahahhahahaaaaa

[@pyrosianheir]

Oooooo, part 1.... Excellent. Edit: While the motives may be petty, it sounds like this DM is one of the WORST people to have in the game, on either side of the screen, so I'm kind of on the player's side. Especially since - given that he's doing this to get back at OldBoy - he likely doesn't normally play or DM like this. Depending on if the other players had played with anyone other than Oldboy, it might be a case where if he'd talked to /them/, maybe hosted a one-shot if he had the time to show them how the game can be better than what they'd put up with, then he could've just jacked the group and left the guy to be kicked down the road for someone else to deal with or something.... Idk.

[@YCCCm7]

He should've used his divination wizard powers to give his DM the 1's he rolled that morning

[@Kurogane893]

Ah yes, the ultimate "fuck you".

[@arienmartinez5025]

Damn the ending at that seven minute mark was crazy, I can’t wait to finish this

[@grassypond4996]

I'm glad that OP was at least encouraging the other players to DM a game, because hopefully figuring out how the rules are actually supposed to work may open their eyes. But on the other hand, there is a chance they may take up all the bad habits of the old DM.

[@truckwarrior5944]

Oldboy did everything by the rules though? Literally everything mentioned is how the rules are supposed to work.

[@MartinBlackArcano]

The unstoppable That Player meets the immovable That DM.

[@Kurogane893]

I mean... he really doesn't seem to meet the requirements for being a "That Guy". Like... he's not being super obnoxious at the table or even going out of his way to put others down because "how dare they try to steal the spotlight from me!" Yes, he is trying to make the DM fail but not in a way that drives players away from the table and the game falls apart because of no players. Hell his biggest sins are making the DM pull out maps and shit and casting god damn Identify. Is that enough to be labeled That Guy? Im not so sure.

[@MartinBlackArcano]

@@Kurogane893 OP is morally ambiguous still.

[@Kurogane893]

@@MartinBlackArcano Morally ambiguous? Gonna hard disagree here. Petty? Yeah I can see that, especially with the map thing.

[@thehowlinggamer5784]

As usual, another warning story that satiates our cravings for the depraved side. Thanks for the delicious story, King of all crabs!

[@CrowePerch]

Chad Terrible Player vs. Virgin Godawful DM: the Final Showdown! Looking forward to the sequel!

[@williambrown5934]

I just wanted to say, while *I am not saying you’re wrong* at all, but I am on the side of the OP in the revenge thing... I just am a believer in what goes around comes around, revenge is a dish best served cold, turn about is fair play... You know, don’t let ppl get away with BS or there is no ‘chance’ they will ever change. I enjoyed this story and look forward to part 2.

[@UDOD0NE]

OP's self-aware and that's what makes it 100% better

[@Dannydarko27]

This is the first time im up to date with a multi part story that hasn't finished

[@Bereii]

You need to be boiled and buttered for uploading part one and keeping us waiting several days for part two 😝

[@donniejefferson9554]

Nice. I was just watching one of your other videos and thought it had been quite a while since you'd made one. Perfect timing

[@iank472]

Well so far from what I've seen in this video I'm absolutely in support of the OP. As I see it he's saving a group of players from becoming either 1. Stuck in a douchebag DMs game/games forever or worse 2. Becoming future That Guy players who berate their DMs for being "Too soft" and "Handing out magic items like candy!". If they have already been conditioned that badly it's a concerning possibility.

[@beesbutinabox1105]

I kinda like the anti-hero, I support his goal

[@branhan215124]

I definitely get Oldboy initial reaction when it came to that Thunderwave thing- the spell says in the range section that is Self (15ft Cube) and spells with a range of self have the effect originate from you. So technically speaking, it does say in the spell that the cube originates on his character- its the rule on cubes that breaks that standard. Not to mention Thunderwave is the only spell with a cube area of effect centered on self, and considering it says in the spell it travels in a wave from you, it should really be a cone. None of that is an excuse for his behavior, nor does it save him from being wrong about not knowing how cubes work. I just had to double check the rules myself because cubes are so underused they rarely come up.

[@truckwarrior5944]

Well they were both wrong though. You are the point of origin, so technically you are part of the cube, you may just decide yourself if you are effected by it or not. And then again this DM does have quite a few houserules, he could have decided that for him it always includes the point of origin.

[@huey_xan6107]

Hope everyone has a magical day🙏🏿

[@quox3987]

Cheers friend.

[@links-gut-versifftergrunme1809]

I cast _Identify._ How magical is it and which is its effect?

[@tronche2cake]

@@links-gut-versifftergrunme1809 it's very magical and will grant you 1 month of crab completely free

[@SeventhSeraphOfficerRevolver]

Same to you

[@bndllama9067]

Whenever I feel like I'm being a bad DM I find the CritCrab and realize every time; "Nah, I'm actually too nice to these assholes". I don't require spell components, good Arcana checks are treated like Detect Magic, and if they attune to, or wear, a magical item without Identify I give them hints or just flat out tell them because I find some of that stuff as tedious as my players. I also actively try to not kill them, if they do something I don't like I hurt their characters feelings or I mess with their heads. If you're enjoying your character and having fun then I will protect them, to a degree, and I'm confident in my creativity so evil and chaotic characters are welcome; you just probably won't want to do it because of the nonsense I'll put in front of you. I had a character get laid in a pocket dimension, taunt me with the phrase "pull-out game weak", and proceed to hit it and quit it without realizing the party would have to return to the pocket dimension. What they found when they returned I took straight out of Rick and Morty; they found a Goliath themed Froopyland with all the "Hills Have Eyes" horrors I could justify. No one had to die and now my "Chaotic Stupid" Goliath cleric has an inbred great-grandson NPC/familiar and actively wants to improve upon his life, dude is now asking for Tomes of Knowledge so his character is less stupid. That was a proud moment.

[@q-tip9962]

God, deciding which one is better is like deciding what brain cancer I prefer, I'm too busy gasping for air and foaming at the mouth to even care which is better. Yes I got that from Text to Speech Emperor, I found a situation that the analogy was perfect for and used, it's too great not to use.

[@zealotoftheorchard9853]

I hope that guy wins against that guy

[@tronche2cake]

what‽ You're for that guy? I'm 100% rooting for that guy and anyone else is wrong!

[@JangoFox]

As an Envoy of Vengeance, I think OP should've just walked away instead of trying to go all "Spy vs Spy" on Oldboy. The best revenge you can have is living a good life and all that. But with all THAT said, I'm rooting for you, OP! Take no quarter! :D

[@jerameysattler5291]

I agree. It's a fun story but I would like to know what his girlfriend though when he said "I'm going to go back and hang out with that guy that made you cry instead of just finding another group we can both be a part of because obviously you enjoy this hobby too."

[@TM-nv]

"Required spell components" Laughs in Arcane Focus

[@thomastegroen1274]

"Arcane focuses actually work differently in my game. Instead of replacing spell components, I'm now just requiring both."

[@shadenox8164]

That's also how the component pouch is supposed to work. If he won't honor that he's not honoring a focus. Also didn't one of them mention being a warlock in a previous campaign and never getting the chance to summon their familiar because of requiring the brazier?

[@ericblankenship1131]

As always a great video!! Love them all

[@QueenCreeps]

Jesus, that cliffhanger hit me like a train O.O

[@thepostaldude2217]

That player is a god damn genius

[@flameofmage1099]

I just now realized how Thunderwave works lol

[@THEPELADOMASTER]

It's always a concern when players are all different levels.

[@Bofore13]

Ah yes, the cranberry vampire, a cranpire.

[@petedarock1521]

op sounds like the type of person to register for a class with a teacher they hate just to ruin it for everyone else out of spite

[@TheUnluckyEverydude]

On one hand, I feel like he should've just stopped playing when he learned the DM was a garbage person and that doing all this is a petty waste of time. On the other hand, I want OP to take this dude down.

[@kayrupe125]

But imagine the satisfaction

[@KertaDrake]

You know, anyone who tells you "One of those dice with the most sides" would be a very good reason to carry a real d100. Anyone who talks down to a player like that should be made a fool of by pulling one out.

[@truckwarrior5944]

For making the oldest joke ever in pen and paper history? That is not talking down to people, that is trying to lighten the mood.

[@GypsyScot1]

For someone who supposedly makes his players track material components that thoroughly, it's weird the DM just let the player cast Identify without the 100 gp pearl that's required

[@truckwarrior5944]

That hit me as akward as well. OP does not seem to be to consitent. Although his examples for DM beeing a bad guy are... not very good? The "It's the one with the 20."-joke is super common. And asking a new player at the table about knowing rules is normal?

[@QuixoteBadger]

This vaguely reminds me of a game I ran over discord last November for a group of 5 players. It was 8 originally, but more on that later. It was my first time as a DM and the setting was a homebrew I came up with on the fly. For clarity, it was meant to be a semi--casual combat light game to give the players a chance to just relax and have fun, which I made clear to the players from the start. The theme was based around the start of a four horsemen style apocalypse that would play out around the players as the campaign progressed. I spent two weeks gathering reference material, writing a few dozen campaign and session notes, approving characters and homebrews my players recommended, and more than twenty open tabs on my web browser from various dnd wikis. Most of the players were polite, experienced, and poignant. All of them were about half my age (14-16ish) but they were all surprisingly mature and excited to play with a new DM. But then, there was a problem... One player who shall not be named directly, both for their privacy and out of principle. We'll just call them Succ, as they wanted to play a homebrew succubus devil prince. Now, Succ was one of the main DM's this group of players had to suffer. Somewhat ironically, they were the one who dragged me in to DM for them. Besides the OP Homebrew race, Succ was mostly quiet for the first week as I worked with the other with the other players to refine their characters, define how certain spells work, etc. As soon as the first weekend came however, our horror story began to unfold. I wake up Saturday morning to near constant pestering from Succ. Not anything related to the game, mind you. Flirting, Invitations to nsfw discord servers, and just generally being an exhausting pain in the butt whenever possible. This went on until four days prior to session zero, when Succ finally submitted their character sheet. Can you guess what it looked like? Can you guess what their first few questions were on what they were allowed to use? Not a single stat below 18 (they promised they rolled fairly). Fire, poison, and necrotic immunity. not resistance, Immunity!. A pitchfork as a weapon, fire spells for days, a tinder box for good measure, even asking what magic items I'd be willing to let them have at lvl 2. I had to remind them that succubi are neutral evil and would not just go burning down random houses for the fun of it like a chaotic stupid idiot, and that there are other players just trying to play the game and have fun. They were quite disappointed. I told them that they would have to reroll their stats for the sake of the rest of the party. There were other players with high stats, sure. But given my recommended roll of 3d6 with +1d4 or reroll (player choice) for stats lower than 6, it was very unlikely to get character stats that high, and I wanted the rest of the group to be able to have fun without one player stealing the spotlight. They fought tooth and nail to keep whatever OP shenanigan fuel they could until it came to the point a day prior to session zero I had to break down and tell them to reroll their character to be PHB compliant with a standard array for their stats, or they couldn't play. No OP homebrew, no shenanigans, no cheating, Period! Of course, their response to this was to go back into the discord and whine to their entire gaming group of over twenty people that I had banned all spells and homebrews and was picking on them. After a dozen or so pm conversations later where I explained that had not been what I said at all. Several of the responses to which were unexpectedly sympathetic to my plight. We came to the conclusion that we should reschedule, as two players had to drop out due to scheduling issues and irl problems (I had reiterated to the better players that real life takes precedent over the game every time, so no one was too bothered) and Succ was removed from the game completely. Come the next friday, The day before session zero, I was messaged by one of the younger players telling me that they were losing their minds after a session of a game DM'd by you can surely guess who, and they just needed to play a normal game to get their head straight. Luckily, everyone else had the day off, so that is how session zero started. The campaign wound up only being two sessions in total, as my own lack of experience as a DM (probably obvious at this point) and more scheduling conflicts (half the players were in different parts of Europe and the other half were on the east coast and central US). But the remaining players and I had a blast. If any of them read this, little Bessie yeolk Never forgets a face! Especially you, skelly bro! tl;dr: Never trust a succubus...

[@salempistorius7395]

I’ll never understand DMs like this. What fun does giving your players magic items but not telling them what they do bring them? What fun do they derive from never letting them succeed no matter what they roll? What fun does forcing your players to hit each other with spells bring them? What went wrong in their life that caused them to need this power trip over their players?

[@truckwarrior5944]

People like to have fun in different ways? I mean OP admitted the Players all enjoyed it a lot and were having fun this way, so good for them? Just like some people like total sandboxes, some like total railroads and some like stuff inbetween.

[@nikolai1566]

He's not the hero we deserve but the hero we need

[@TheAfker]

for real i kinda liked the way the DM introduced them in to an alrrady running campaign, i mean dude handled it terribly but pretty cool

[@OhmegaMan]

No notification for this... Really liked it when I saw it!

[@randyranderson690]

This is why fighting fire with fire works. It's not pretty but it works.

[@kaiceecrane3884]

Crustaceans freak me out, especially after being swarmed by crabs and attacked, but this crab character is really cute

[@Lucario690]

It's a heavyweight battle of the Craigs, two enter but only one can retain the title of human dumpster fire!!!

[@dew-it8744]

Honestly, I also thought thunder wave came from you too.

[@primeemperor9196]

Thing about the Thunderwave: It can have you in the center or with you on one of the edges. Both DM and player were correct.

[@KaitouKaiju]

@@UrsulaMajor Why couldn't the center of the face be the one on the ground at your feet?

[@truckwarrior5944]

@@UrsulaMajor Check the phb yourself i'd say. Cause the phb states that every cube can include the point of origin, if you chose so.

[@Linkolnverse]

Thunderwave feels like it centers on the self tbh, like Mind Blast from Dragon Age II

[@truckwarrior5944]

Yeah, thats why many groups handle it like that. And the wording which technically does state that you are the center.

[@THEPELADOMASTER]

It feels like it based on the wording. The whole "15ft originating from you" and all. But apparently it's not. Crawford himself confirmed it. I just found out too.

[@truckwarrior5944]

@@THEPELADOMASTER No you are the center of the thing, it originates from you. But it does not hit you, if you don't want it to. That is how the rules specify. You just need to look at the spell and the rule for cones. The wording is just very bad, cause just looking at the spell you would think that means you are included and logically you should be, but for balance there is the rule that cones that originate from you do not effect you, if you don't want them to (which mean they could)

[@THEPELADOMASTER]

@@truckwarrior5944 you're not the center. The cube originates from you and you're located on one of the sides of the cube. It's been confirmed by jeremy crawford in a tweet. *Question* Thunderwave Spell:Where is the cube? Is the caster at the center of the cube, or on one side of the cube? Caster's choice? *Crawford's answer* The point of origin of a cubic area of effect, including thunderwave's, is on a face of the cube (PH, pg 204), not inside it. Note that he says "the point of origin of a cubic area is on a face". In thunderwave, you're the point of origin. So you must be on one of the sides of the area, and not inside it.

[@truckwarrior5944]

@@THEPELADOMASTER That is a contradiction to the rule he is pointing to. The rule points out you are technically inside but you do not count as inside for the effect if you don't choose so.

[@spleeneater9481]

thank you for singlehandedly destroying my own self doubt with this video

[@unintentionally_edgy5867]

the Funeral pyre this guy was building this episode was impressive. cant wait to see it go up in flames with OldBoys campaign

[@MilkyMonstrosity]

I would have just left and ran my own campaign and spent more time with my girlfriend, and I wouldn't want the other people there in the game because of the fact that if they are so foolish to hang out with a total prick and be cool with him being so, they aren't people I want to be around. That's just the cold hard facts.

[@truckwarrior5944]

And then take into consideration the examples of DM beeing a prick to GF. They are given so they must be the worst things he did, correct? 1. He did the "It's the one with the 20 on it."-Joke. Propably the most common joke in the D&D community. Not mean at all, it's just a bad joke people make when someone does not instantly take up their die when they should roll. Funny? Depends on your taste. Mean? Nah. 2. He asked a new player in his game that he did not know, about her knowing a rule. How is that mean? He does not know her. OP literally wrote that when they wanted to explain their levels of experience the DM did not have time and waved them off. So from DMs perspective he knew nothing about her level of experience.

[@TailsClock]

The GMPC that knows how to get through past the dungeon traps is something my DM did. But it was done so well that it's sad to imagine it being done badly. Basically a hobo rogue who lived in the dungeon we were exploring, he's a friendly guy that dislikes confrontation and enjoys the quiet. But naturally he must get a bit lonely too. He escorts us down there one time, and showed up another time at random. He's not a bad fighter at all, but he never overshadows anyone. He gives covering fire with his crossbow and works as a casual trap detector. He fills a slot we simply don't have filled already. He isn't able to overshadow any at all. He's perfect! Also he has a dark past that we all know is going to be revealed in a cool way that might result in so many wacky situations that would be much harder to do with a PC. His life can be in danger and we will know that this is a legit risk. He's a DMPC done right. Even when he does solve puzzles and get us into new rooms, it's still a team effort all the way. I love this character type, the dungeon hobo with his pile of treasures, staying down here to collect more and more. So really damn saddening to see a GM create a character as a dungeon explorer with the sole purpose of taking puzzles away from the players is damn weird and awful. That should be a last resort to use the character for, when the whole party spends 2 hours trying to solve the piano key puzzle... Which is what happened in my game. We spent so long on one puzzle whilst having no dungeon hobo to help us out, and I just can imagine our GM's frustration. I myself was finding it all quite funny, and ended up being the one that finally solved it. In suc ha dumb way that no-one knows if that was the real answer, or if the GM just said it was to move us on. Puzzle helpers are a safety net, a last resort, a good idea. Misusing them this way just has made me dang mad. I hate to think that any of these players might be put off of games that use a similar character from remembering their bad experience.

[@TOPACE31]

This feels akin to Godzilla vs King Ghidorah, both are horrible monsters causing mass destruction in their wake but in the end it's Godzilla (OP) we want to win.

[@SilentCartagrapher]

OP knew he was being petty but he declared war for the lols.

[@billvolk4236]

I played in a retro AD&D campaign once. I rolled well enough to make a paladin. The DM got really salty whenever I tried to detect evil. He kept trying to change the rules for the ability on the fly. "Is he evil?" "Well, you see, that only detects when someone has evil intentions at that moment." "Does he have evil intentions at this moment?" "Well, um, it doesn't work unless he's an evil cleric." "Is he an evil cleric?" "..." The dude literally sent a disguised evil cleric with evil intentions at us in town and then forgot that that was within even the ridiculous restrictions he placed on Detect Evil.

[@Commonwealth_Of_Pennsylvania]

My group jokes about doing things like this occasionally. We have fake "Dark side contingencies" for a bad dm situation. Usually it's playing a dumb character idea like just playing the covenant from halo or playing all famous dictators but we wouldn't actively try to fuck up a campaign. Op definitely has some red flags going and this is honestly pretty petty. The dm is terrible but op definitely isn't trying for the moral high ground

[@veronicabaranowski6976]

I don’t think he was. I think he was trying to level the field after his gf was treated like crap by a misogynist.

[@Commonwealth_Of_Pennsylvania]

@@veronicabaranowski6976 that's still not exactly claiming the high ground. The dm is horrible, that we agree on. For me personally, I would view this as not worth my time. Obviously I can't speak for op and maybe my opinion will change in part 2 but until then, the only person I really sympathize with is the girlfriend. Thanks for not being an asshole tho. I respect that

[@truckwarrior5944]

@@veronicabaranowski6976 Where? Can you explain to me how DM is a misogynist? I'm not an english-native speaker and I dont see that at all. There is only 2 examples of interaction between DM and GF we get. 1. He makes the "It's the one with the 20 on it."-joke. That is not sexist. That is just the most common D&D-Joke propably in existence. That is a joke done very commonly and has nothing to do with sexism. 2. He asked a player he does not know about her knowing how prof.-mod works. He does not know anything about her, so why would that be sexist? New players at the table might or might not know how rules work.

[@christopherdossantos9250]

wake up babe new critcrab

[@IzzyMarrie]

The first story gave me flashbacks to my technically first D&D game. Me and the guy I was dating at the time were told that we could join an ongoing campaign, but what we weren't told was that our introduction was going to be us chained to a dungeon wall for over an hour in real life since the other player characters would have to find us. And it didn't matter what we did to try and escape, btw, no matter the trickery, strength, even a nat 20... The DM took a while to finally just tell us that we might as well not have turns until the others rescue us as it's a waste of time, and no matter what we did, we wouldn't be getting out by ourselves. This of course annoyed me to no end, but looking back at it makes me pissed. An hour passed until I decided I had enough, but oh THEN the DM chimes in that the others were close to finding us. Bologna. Not to mention, but I should've taken it as a red flag to begin with when he started us off chained to the wall saying *if* the others find us, we can escape. Like wtf, just say you didn't want us there. Luckily, my second campaign years later was better, although definitely not the best since it was me and one other person new to the game, and the DM (he was trying his best!) hadn't dm'd before. It took around 5 sessions before I understood what I could do during a fight as a rogue since he was so nervous dm'ing, he'd drink the whole time and unfortunately would give us conflicting answers to our questions. Other than that though, we still had some fun. Never will forget the time my rogue slithered into town with my friend's monk, got drunk after being told he wasn't going to buy him breakfast, and subsequently convinced an entire town he was their militant God.... Upon returning from a little adventure, our DM managed to successfully role for the God to notice I was impersonating him, and I made the incredibly lucky roll (nat 20) to convince him I was sorry and wouldn't do it again lol Because we were practically dead

[@canthandle5088]

Now the eager anticipation for the next video begins

[@SaintofM]

10 minute mark, started laughing. I like OP

[@kcollier2192]

Time to break out the popcorn- and I'm not all that fond of popcorn.

[@mpeterll]

What I'd like to know is how on earth someone as bad as that managed to get (and keep) a full group.