Crossdressing, Sexuality, Gender Dysphoria, and Transgender Identity.

[@clara_cross]

I'm gonna drop some time stamps here because (at least for now) this video doesn't have chapter divisions, and I think it would REALLY benefit from having them. I hope people will find these useful. 0:00 Introduction, Clarification & Foreword 3:43 Definitions 4:45 Three Common Patterns of Behaviour 6:16 Pattern Group 1 Introduction 7:00 Pattern Group 1 Vector A 9:36 Pattern Group 1 Vector B 11:44 Pattern Group 1 Review 12:40 Pattern Group 2 Introduction 15:05 Pattern Group 2 Vector A 17:39 Pattern Group 2 Vector B 22:36 Pattern Group 2 Vectors A & B Review 23:30 Pattern Group 2 Vector C 26:21 Pattern Group 3 27:56 Final Thoughts 29:53 A Word of Caution Regarding Assumptions 31:03 Closing Statements

[@DRZPHD]

Thank you so much for doing this. I don't always have time bandwidth to create them. Will cut and paste into description box.

[@clara_cross]

@@DRZPHD You're welcome! ¦D I'm so flattered that you added them to the video. ^.^

[@Phoenix.Sparkles]

It makes me angry whenever I hear about people that crossdress getting hate or shamed for it, they have beautiful personalities and the lack of support just makes them harder to find as friend or a date.

[@DRZPHD]

Totally hear you.

[@LaLa-sz3vn]

Yes You are so right!! The choice of my clothes and footwear, doesn't illustrate the person that I am. It is an expression of the spiritual freedom that I have within. I'm a Straight Male who is a Transvestic Women's Shoe Fetishist Who wears Women's Footwear especially High Heels. It's

[@paulharvey7541]

It's funny....It started with my shoe fetish. I bought a pair of mary janes...and 2 years later I'm trying to pass as a woman....(that's a huge mountain to climb!).....

[@SHADOW-nb4ok]

As a long time fan of drzphd she’s saved my life by being here she has helped me push forward with my transition even though it meant due to religion in general that I got disowned by my entire family if she says something it’s ether 100% correct or close enough to it so far since 19 when I joined her Chan it’s been 100% correct

[@Valerie_Valkyrie315]

Ever since I started HRT I feel more like me wearing feminine clothing. Before it was sort of wishful thinking, if that makes sense. I wanted to wear it but it felt like I was just cosplaying, but now it feels 'right'.

[@DRZPHD]

Totally get this.

[@percsie3072]

This is very nice to read

[@impreza021]

Hello Dr Z, i really want say thank you, i wish i would have had this vid four years ago , but i am sooo happy that you made this one now. this one really does or at least gives a path for most common ways to classifying and identifying gender dysphoria for many of our sisters, brothers and Non Binaries. Tgroup one was the most relevant to me with just feeling more at peace, much happier as my hormones distance my male skin away, and loving my body matching my core identity. Thank you for all you do, we love you because of how you have put in such heart and passion into helping our community.

[@DRZPHD]

So glad it was helpful to you.

[@clarissanavarro2762]

The Irony is.... for me, as a Transgender woman,...all the time I was boy-moding, I was engaging in cross-dressing. Now that I am transitioning, and presenting 24/7,... I am finally not crossdressing anymore. lol...

[@DRZPHD]

Thanks for sharing.

[@Valerie_Valkyrie315]

Yes!!

[@emmajay4495]

Clarissa yes precisely that. #metoo

[@blu-i3s]

Same!

[@Shalanaya]

I know, what has changed is a need to cross-dress as a way how to escape somehow and relieve stress, now it feels like there is no need to escape, like we're home.

[@r9h]

Please, help. I can't figure out who I am. I didn’t have dysphoria or any signs, only in childhood when I saw my face in the mirror, I considered myself ugly and didn’t want to look. At the age of 14 I started crossdressing, in porn I always imagined myself in the place of a girl, and that was the only thing that excited me. Afterwards, I was ashamed and disgusted. I knew that I was a guy from birth, I I will never be a girl and I didn’t even think about becoming one, since after all, I got a man’s body and I can’t choose and change it, I didn't think it was possible at all. I recognized myself as a guy with a man's brain and body. But my crossdressing and orientation caused shame and disgrace, I often threw things away, sought salvation in faith and struggled with myself. Two years ago I lost faith in God and again my attraction led me to crossdressing. I never played for female characters because I knew that I was a guy and therefore had to play for male characters, but I decided to try and I really liked it. I was addressed in the feminine gender, I was able to be sweet and feminine, I was able to have sex in a feminine way in the game and I realized that it would have been better for me to have been born a girl. I did not suffer from the fact that I am a man, but rather from the fact that I want to be a woman, it is ruining my life. I spend a lot of time taking care of myself, a lot of money on hair removal, I even pulled out all the hair on my facehrough the pain.I don’t want to spend $20,000 on facial surgery, that’s my salary for two years, but I still want it, and I can’t do anything about this desire. I cannot tolerate this desire, my brain forces me to do this without my consciousness. I understand that this is all nonsense, it’s easier and simpler to live as a man, I’m tired of fighting with myself and decided to accept myself. In terms of dysphoria, I didn’t have any pain from being a man, but I have a persistent desire to become a girl, which used to disappear after masturbation, but now this doesn’t help either. Recently I finally accepted that I would never be a beautiful girl, and fell into apathy and depression, having lost the meaning of life, I didn’t want anything, I can’t live like this now and I realized that I still have to To follow the path of feminization, and this will at least correspond to what I feel in sex. I don’t perceive my male body and gay sex as disgusting in this regard, but I would like to be a girl. Then I thought how cool it would be to wear dresses and long hair and jewelry and no one would say anything to me since girls can do this. I was bullied as a child, and I didn't have a father, but when appeared steppded He was like a tyrant, constantly punishing for minor offenses, it seems to me that there was not enough love and perhaps my brain decided that being a girl is a way to get love and not be bullied on the street And at school. I don't know. Now I really want to start hormone therapy and I have already come out to my parents, but I am still ashamed to go out as a girl. Sometimes I feel like a guy in a woman clothing . There are many things to tell. Please tell me that I'm transgender, I would really like to accept myself but I don't. I hate myself because I'm not transgender, just a freak, a pervert..

[@percsie3072]

First off, you’re not a freak and you’re not a pervert. You are very confused about your sexual and gender identities and Internalized transphobia/homophobia have lead you to believe the hateful misinformation that bigots preach. I’ve never related to someone’s life experience more than this. I can’t say my advice will be very good because I am no professional but from the sounds of it you’re a repressed trans woman. You talk about how you “don’t have dysphoria” but then talk about how your brain constantly reminds you “you’re just a man and will always be a man” and that’s exactly what my dysphoria sounds like. You have a strong desire to be the opposite sex and have had that desire for a long time. You want to start hrt. Cis people don’t think like that. If you aren’t already I would highly recommend starting therapy and preferably a therapist who specializes in helping trans people. Start to try and work on improving your ability to argue with your self loathing thoughts. It isn’t going to be an easy journey but it will be worth it. Remember, you are loved and there is light at the end of the tunnel.

[@GwennGates]

At age 4, when I feminized crossdressed, I felt 'right' in female clothing. As I moved into puberty, crossdressing did bring an amount of sexual pleasure. You mention how dysphoria may increase as one sees themselves for the first time crossdressed. The first time I was able to crossdress and apply makeup, my dysphoria (I didn't know it was dysphoria at the time) magnified exponentially. I have been diagnosed with Gender Dysphoria, and my desire for sexual pleasure while being crossdressed has decreased in magnitudes. I started HRT and transitioning 15 months ago, I am also not crossdressing anymore because I am presenting as female. What I found interesting, is, I have come full circle from age 4, in that I am comfortable and feel 'right' as a female. That puts me, I feel, in group one. I feel more relaxed, more happier, and very much more comfortable in my body as the hormones align my body to my core identity. Thank you for, as always, another wonderful and introspective video! 💖💖

[@DRZPHD]

Thank you for sharing.

[@alemusicgirl]

thats typical autogynephilia

[@GwennGates]

@@alemusicgirl I'm sorry, are you a certified psychologist that has diagnosed me with auto gynephillia? I defer to the mental health professionals that would disagree with you.

[@alemusicgirl]

@@GwennGates you dont need to be a professional to understand those funtamentals

[@GwennGates]

@@alemusicgirl

[@AdrictaTDT-Twitch]

Thank you for remaking this video Dr Z. I insist on the importance of going to a therapist to sort things out, in the end you have to do a thoroughly self examination to get to the core of who you are and being opened to the answers. I don't like to label myself even though I did it for a loong time. I felt like a deviant and the fear can be paralyzing however I come out of the doubts little by little, the patters I've had my whole life are complex and I'm evolving with them but it's slow. I remember my firsts sessions with the therapist and I was always telling her that I wanted to be a woman but that I was a pervert, it was so difficult. What I do now is that as time passes by and I step forward clarity comes everytime more and more. It's not that I don't feel doubts sometimes or fear, but it doesn't paralyze me.

[@DRZPHD]

Glad this was more clear and yes, it is often confusing and shame and guilt associated with the behavior makes things even worse.

[@lennagriffiths1008]

Your re-shoot still does a brilliant job of dealing with the very difficult and controversial topic. There are issues with linguistic interpretation and usage with-in the community that is regional and/or generational in nature. I rewatched Episode 60 of your KZbin video series from about 2 years ago that I would recommend those that are still confused watch/rewatch that video as it may help clarify some of the points you are making.

[@DRZPHD]

Thank you for sharing.

[@joerubi6249]

DR Z. I was so glad that I found your video. Ever since I was little, I always love women's beauty and fashion. Even more so now that I am slowly transitioning. I have reached the point in my life that I must live the way I live my life with no boundaries. I know that I am more than a crossdresser but transgender but all I can think of living and dressing as a woman without having suicidal thoughts, which I have in the past. Being who I am is no turning back! Thank you for this video and by the way, you dress chic and stylish. ♥

[@bssalesstories2042]

Your videos have been very helpful for me in my journey. Thanks for all you do.

[@JessRenee91481]

Lack of functionality for me was the best thing about HRT. I hated it so much when things would stir.

[@DRZPHD]

Thats also very common.

[@jfan1320]

I was cross-dressing many years before I came out as transgender when I was in my early teens while I was cross-dressing I felt myself in those moments but the hormonal piece made it hard because back then I had testosterone in my body minus the estrogen also puberty so there was even more of a disconnection i liked cross-dressing it was what led me up to finding out what it really was but it wasn't enough I needed that psychological and hormonal piece I couldn't start HRT when I was younger cause my mother wasn't supportive I also had a vivid memory of a moment of me in a dress when I was a toddler I was in the closet for a long time finally got help at 18 and was diagnosed with gender dysphoriaI didn't know what gender dysphoria even was back then and when I finally found out what it was no question or second thought that was it I was also very feminine to begin with it I acted feminine I talked feminine I hung around more girls than guys but it was hard for me to look at myself id have panic attacks and crying fits I'm grateful to have a good team of health professionals that have my best interest in that back of their mind

[@DRZPHD]

Thank you for sharing.

[@tremereowen]

Thank you Dr.Z for this re-shooting, it is amazing that you are able to follow the conversation and adapt on the go. I actually felt confused by the first video, now I think I fall most closely into group 2.2, but I'm aware of some degree of incongruence since the times I was a child, more clearly from puberty and later, increasing over time. Getting a label is relieving, quite a big deal, it provides some ground to step on. Now I just need to know what to do about it , though chances are I will manage to uncomfortably live in my gender assigned at birth till my last day. Thank you so much!

[@DRZPHD]

Glad this one clarifies in a better way! I am all for clarity!

[@StevenRay-dh4cv]

Hello to all! I have to be a case study for most of the good Dr.s content here- especially this video. I turn 60 next month people- The only part of this video that doesn't speak to me is the group with the artists and musicians(love both). Obviously my story is very long, 50+ years! I found DrZ a few weeks ago and found my self in a video binge. I am in partial state of shock as I now have learned so much, in a short amount of time. Which unfortunately means that I may have at least 50- 55 years exposed to gender dysphoria and most of that time was unware if not totally oblivious. It has left me no doubt as what my trans identity is - I haven't worn mens underwear in 20 years. To summarize- I was and still am Trans-Fem and nonbinay long before I ever heard the word transgender- DR . Z thank you so very much for your brilliant work! I would be my pleasure toget my diagnosis from you!

[@DRZPHD]

Thank you for sharing and I am glad the content is helpful.

[@neowolf09]

i think i get it. im part of the first group i'm sure. i could mostly care less what im wearing when having fun times as long as im being treated the way i like, i mean i enjoy making my partner happy when i have one so if they like an outfit ill wear it during but thats mostly for them, for me its always been about comfort, same reason ill just hang out alone in my room, playing videogames or watching a movie as i normally would until i fall asleep dressed. thank you so much i think this actually cleared up a lot for me!

[@DRZPHD]

Glad the video was helpful.

[@carlbenj1668]

Iam 65 been married 42 years all had this feeling i should of came out 40 years ago , wife would of stayed with me or left, but i didnt, now 4 kids later 11 grandkids, i know if i came out i would loose everything..i know how they feel about it.I cant start over some say yes you can.. No I cant, so I stay in the closet .. I got a safe place I go to everyday for 6 hours by myself where My lady comes out, then I go back to my man side and stay there till my next day.some say Iam nuts you are either a man or woman but you cant be both.....

[@christine_penn]

I knew something was up when I was 4. I started cross dressing at @ 7 years, and there was no sexual arousal related about it all during these early years. (I definitely equate to expressing the way I felt inside as an external manifestation.) Later on with puberty, sexual arousal did become a part of cross dressing, which created a lot of confusion for me. Much later in life, I did have a hard time trying to distinguish what was core feelings and what was more of a fetish to the cause of the arousal. Even with that...it was never quite satisfying to me. (There was always something that seemed to be missing.) Eventually, I did come back to the core of that I truly was transgender, that my sexual identity had really never changed, and that I truly identified as female at my core. But wow was that confusing for a long time. (It can be rough in the closet....) So glad I got through all those times and made it to who I am today.

[@DRZPHD]

Thank you for sharing.

[@BCSchmerker]

+DRZPHD *Thanks for the corrections this vid.* Seven vectors between three groups cover the majority of applicable cases.

[@DRZPHD]

Glad it was more clear.

[@candycox3007]

Tremendous video, very insightful. I had to watch it 3 times so to understand fully, but I'm an engineer analyzing things. Most informative revelation was how we evolve with time, and feelings repressed slowly come forth. I first was exploring my gender expression, probably based on hidden TG. That lead to some sexual pleasure, but it did not last for too many months. I realized a deeper reason that feminine dress felt correct- it matched with my inner core.

[@DRZPHD]

Glad to hear it was helpful. The topic is complex and not as simple as many state.

[@Christine_Robyn]

This was a very informative video. I have tried to convince myself over the course of my lifetime that I am not transgender. I have always tried to rationalize what I was feeling is just a sexual proclivity or a fetish. I know deep in my heart that I am transgender, but have not been able to accept it. When my wife divorced me because she did not want to be with a transgender person it sent me into a fit of anger and denial. I even went to the extreme of the "Purge" which was a huge mistake. Four years later the anger and denial is gone, I had to let it go. Now I am once again trying to come to terms with who I am.

[@jasonwismer2670]

It is a sexual disorder. Its a sexual fascination disorder. If you had no sexual fascination, you wouldn't care.

[@serenasynthesis]

I want to offer my own experience with crossdressing, which I was not comfortable with sharing on that first video... this video seems to at least come closer to the mark. I __COULD NOT TRANSITION__ when I was younger. Very occasional crossdressing was one of my few outlets. Being able to see myself as female allowed me a little tiny crack of light and happiness in my life. I further ended up conflating these tiny crumbs of imaginary gender euphoria with one of the only other things that allowed me to self-soothe for many years, which was self-pleasure. _Because of the messages of the time I grew up and the shame I felt with both behaviors_, I never had a chance to really understand who I was. The other benefit was by indulging in self-pleasure, not only did I get an extra dose of happy brain chemicals it also came with a very clear sign to stop and wallow in shame. Crossdressing in public for me was never an option because I was incredibly conscious of how my body looked and my safety, much less the fact that I had a family. Not everyone can just throw on a cute dress, look in the mirror, and find gender euphoria... especially because my "socially acceptable" method of self-soothing was overeating, which creates a fat man in a dress. It's so easy to end up in such a deep shame cycle. I downvoted the first video and I did not attempt to say why. I hope you can see why, because all of this makes me feel not only shame but also a ton of trauma. I really do wish that I could have transitioned ten, twenty, thirty years ago. I am incredibly angry at myself for not knowing this stuff when I was ten, twenty, or thirty years old. I am deeply frustrated by life and society for not only being how it was when I was younger but also for being how it is right now too. I did start transitioning three-plus years ago. I am hoping that I have a chance at being the person that I wished I could have been in all of those horrible lonely shameful nights where I could just barely touch the idea of gender euphoria and could only self-pleasure out of a need to have some small happy feeling in my life. I'm trying so hard to get there and I feel like I am trying my best in order to obtain this life. Ultimately... if you're reading this comment, I hope that you attempt to interrogate your feelings surrounding this long before I did.

[@DRZPHD]

Hi. I am so sorry to hear of your pain around this issue, trauma and shame. Thank you for being vulnerable and share with others and I wish you all the best.

[@Johnny_T779]

I am happy to know that you are able to transition at last! Believe me, it's never too late, I started T at 50 and now, 4 years later, I feel better than I have my whole life. Nothing wrong with being a fat lady, it even may help you to look more feminine and curvy. The important thing is that you feel like the lady you always where. 😊

[@serenasynthesis]

@@Johnny_T779 You are right in that there should be nothing inherently wrong with being a large woman. The problem is that the world unfortunately makes it a problem for large women, especially large trans women, and in the very early going in my own gender journey receiving such a backlash and having my safety directly threatened would probably have locked me in the closet for the rest of my short life. This is why I spoke up, because i do hope that others can find a space for themselves after having to deal with shame and stigma for so much of their lives.

[@brianr6704]

It sounds like we had very similar experiences. I’m sixty years old and started transitioning two years ago. I spent most of my life deeply ashamed of my desire to dress like a woman and the sexual pleasure it would bring. Now that I’m transitioning I no longer find sexual pleasure in wearing women’s clothing. I dress like a woman because I am one.

[@fatoumata7624]

​@@brianr6704 You lost it because hrt kills T, not because you are a woman (as you are not).

[@Claire.sterling]

Wonderful video. There really is so much going on here. Very complex. I think for me something that I have found as a personal identifier of the possibility of me being trans (still working through this process, very new to so much and still working to find answers rn) is that I experience a lot of Gender Envy. In fact the more I’ve meditated on this the more I think I married my ex wife because I wanted to be her. When we were sexually intimate I would imagine myself in her position. I do this all the time and not only in a sexual context. I haven’t watched all of your videos but I would be super interested in watching if you have on covering the topic of Gender Envy, trans, nonbinary and gender fluid.

[@DRZPHD]

Thank you for sharing and gender envy is something I hear a lot about. Will def do a video.

[@laurenemilykoster7362]

Thank you for doing this video! I think a lot of us who experience arousal or used to at the beginning are troubled by this because we think it means we cannot truly be transgender. But then we also know that we have feelings of dysphoria as we express ourselves as the target gender and that those feelings intensify as we progress further in our journey. Are you saying, in essence, that crossdressing behavior is unmasking gender feelings that were already there and are not the main thing, but merely a means to an end?

[@DRZPHD]

Hi. For many, Crossdressing does mask Dysphoria that is already present for sure. For others, Crossdressing has nothing to do with gender Dysphoria.

[@GeniMagi]

The term used by the man mentioned regarding sexual arousal and cross dressing I think was important to include in written format such as on the screen or at least in the description and or pinned in the comments because the first thing I wanted to do was to view that video and or information. Or simply spell out the term. Simply because it is an uncommon term which I cannot easily spell out by hearing you say it. How is the term spelled? 14:14 Autogynephilia

[@jameelarosetafoya2058]

You described me to a T almost exactly 💯 I'm so glad these things are more available today than when I was a child

[@DRZPHD]

Thank you.

[@ArquiVeo]

At 38! I am finally understanding myself. Boy i should have taken action much much more sooner

[@william63]

When I was younger and entering puberty (in the mid 1970's) I would become so excited and aroused if my family went out and I had some time home alone. The reason, because I would open my mother's wardrobe and put her clothes on and then I would fulfil the arousal, feel shame and put the clothes away. When I was older and had an opportunity to dress and I would go out to cross-dressing clubs, groups or spend nights out dressed, the sexual element and arousal became non-existent. And when I dress now, there is no arousal or sexual activity. This chimes with what Dr Z is saying but I am still not 100% certain if I am transgender. I probably am but life, society, body shape, hair loss and much more gets in the way.

[@BiancaTallarico]

I felt sexually arrosed when I first started dressing because, in my own opinion of my appearance, I actually felt sexy and confident. Nowadays I just dress if I want to go out. It's a hassel to put on hose, garter, sexy bra, and dress every day. 😆 Otherwise, I put on my panties, thigh-high socks, throw on a tee shirt, and jeans. My co-workers do the same. Seen ladies in Guns n Roses tees or Motley Crue tees at my job.

[@DRZPHD]

Thank you for sharing.

[@pythosdegothos6181]

I am definitely in Group 3, I SOOoooo wish it was far more embraced by our society. As I earlier said I wish all gender and sex based dress codes were thrown away.

[@Jagovanni]

Thank you so much for explaining a huge part of my life to me!

[@DrayseSchneider]

I think this video is much better than the previous one, but I still don't know what group I fall into. I know that I'm trans but I can recall feeling a bit from all trans identified categories though not equally mixed. I mean, I know I'm trans, I've been diagnosed as having dysphoria and I'm happy that I'm finally transitioning. In the end, what does it matter except if one has to make diagnosis. Which I don't have to.

[@DRZPHD]

I think it’s less of a matter which group you belong to and more that you now know your identity. Thank you for letting me know this video is more clear.

[@harrispinkham]

I discovered I have facial hair dysphoria in that I’m AFAB and WANT facial hair for the first time when I used a gender swap app. I’ve never felt pretty or good looking and suddenly when I started questioning my gender, I was like, hey! I make a handsome dude! I’ve been trying out fake beards and I’m always so sad to take them off as I feel handsome and attractive for the first time! I never would’ve imagined this in my 20s.

[@DRZPHD]

Thanks for sharing.

[@patriceferguson7340]

I have been masculine oriented since 6 yrs old. My mom actually had her sister make a duplicate pair of pajamas that matched my brothers at Christmas because the family brought me long pink gounds and she knew if I opened them it would lead to tears and self isolation in the attic. Yes I often by that time go lock myself in the attic room because they would dress me in girl clothes. It was so embarrassing. Back then I got sent to many a psychiatric visit to figure it out because I would not come out of the attic for days even to eat and it locks from the inside. I was luck that when puberty came along it was slow and out of sinc with typical female development. Then they started questioning everything about me. Turns out out I have a chromosome Chimera. So I got the boy body of my dreams minus the equipment. But didn’t have the upper body breast or hips. Straight flanked wide neck big shoulders and hairy. I was pleased with that but my parents were even more alarmed 😱. They wanted their little girl a pretty woman. They tried everything in the way of hormones to get that. I finally had enough of them and left joined the peace corps. Back then psychologists were not very sympathetic. They encouraged and even shamed me and said I would be a lesbian. Jobs were hard to find. True that society see’s what they want and reject that which doesn’t conform. That’s why Trans people go through all these bodily changes to fit into their identity because society sees these traits as unquestionable chizzeled validation of being a sex. They equate sex with character. So is to say. You are a screw if you have the anatomy of a screw. Or a socket likewise you can’t be the other. How dehumanizing that we compare humans to objects, non living things. I just say I got the wrong address for soul delivery upon arrival.

[@nicholaskelly6276]

Please increase volume, can’t hear working in machine shop lol

[@jaygent2836]

very clear helpful and useful clarification of these distinct (edna) modes

[@DRZPHD]

Glad it was helpful!

[@juligrlee556]

I think you focus your counseling on the American Culture. But I wonder about other cultures like the culture of the various parts of the Russian Empire and the various Asian cultures, places like Hungary and so on. There seems to be an explosion of Transgender and transexual hate, M to F and F to M. I read something yesterday accusing trans woman as being misogynistic. I grew up and sought out the women's gatherings in our family. I found it very difficult to hang out with the males in our family. I identified with women from my earliest memories. I think a lot of people do not understand and do not want to understand personal identities. My first memory of my father was of him attacking my mother and yelling that he would not allow any "queers" in his family. I was confused and frightened and I sought ways to hide my identity for most of my life.

[@DRZPHD]

Yea I think there are many experiences based on population one works wirh for sure.

[@juligrlee556]

@@DRZPHD I'm thankful for people like you who are not seeing the trans experience is monolithic but with some common processes. I see how the trans women of India seem to have a much different experience of trans people in say the Gay section of San Francisco or Chicago.

[@amandageorge9465]

I identify with group one and two and to me it seems progressive in many respects. I am 61 yo and thought crossdresser and transvestite was my situation. Over the past 5 years it has all progressed. I went to several therapists, and a couple trans specialists, and have been diagnosed with gender dysphoria. I guess I am "officially" trans. I have a family and really am trying hard to keep this all bottled up, but it is a challange. The education Dr Z provides on the topic is excellent. Question to the group, has anyone found a good way to slow this down. I am trying just to run out the clock before this pushes me over the edge.

[@DRZPHD]

Thanks for sharing and I wish you all the best.

[@ActualResponse]

Just wanted to let you know for better audio quality :) That is a side-address microphone, so you're supposed to speak in to the side of it, not the end of it. At least if you use the cardioid mode, which is highly recommended for just one speaker that sits in one place as it picks up a lot less reflections of your voice from around the room :)

[@DRZPHD]

Thanks,.

[@ActualResponse]

@@DRZPHD I apologize.

[@hockeyhacker97]

For me I started cross dressing in private in starting 6th or 7th grade, while whenever I would feel depressed and for whatever reasons it helped me get out of depression back to normal (well what was normal for me anyways, will explain later), I didn't know the why at the time it helped with depression, and even now I can only make logical assumptions as to the why (It is probably a pretty safe assumption seeing as I also did things like when I was 8 years old I stole my mom's birth control pills because for some reason I knew that they contained hormones and my body was wanting those hormones). But yeah I used cross dressing in private as a way to deal with depression. And what do I mean by "normal for me anyways", well by that I mean even alleviating the observable issues of depression and felt normal for me, well recently nearly 25 years later I finally realized who I am and accepted who I am and having had that brief sense of actually being happy for once I realize that what I viewed as "normal" growing up I was still probably dealing with mild depression but just didn't notice it because it was just normal for me, I didn't realize how miserable I had felt for so long until I finally had a reference point of not suppressing who I am, because once I was able to actually feel happy it made me realize just how "not normal" my sense of "normal" was for a very very long time. But yeah for me cross dressing was how I managed to ignore depression and keep it at a "normal", manageable level. I would say I really wish I hadn't suppressed who I am for so long, but it is really suppression when the thing you are suppressing is something you don't even know is a thing? I guess what I should say instead is that I wish it wasn't such a taboo subject so that if you sense something is off you can actually talk to someone about it and do something about it as a pose to having to ignore it and pretend like you are fine.

[@DRZPHD]

Thank you for sharing.

[@t-man5196]

I have gynandromorphophilia and I've had it since early childhood. Do we know what causes it? My instinct is to assume that it's not a natural part of sexuality since studies have shown that there is usually a hypersexuality component to it but I don't know. Thanks in advance

[@toddandrews9829]

I started x dressing in my early teens for the novelty and sexual arousal. Still did until about 15 years ago and haven't been aroused since then, but my want and or need has almost become all consuming. I'm trying to find my way with the help of my therapist and hoping to start transitioning in the near future.

[@DRZPHD]

Wishing you all the best.

[@MathewRainTranslife101]

I am trans and I fall into the third category. I'm a trans man and I gender bend which is very confusing for a lot of people. I can't afford top surgery which is a struggle but have been on testosterone for 2 years and 3 months. I like feminine clothing but don't identify as a woman (my AGAB) or as non-binary. It's hard to feel seen and it's hard to dress and express myself the way I want to because it confuses people. If I say I am a trans guy (and people can see that anyway because of my voice, my masculine name and facial hair etc but I have breasts) they understand but then if they see me in a blouse or a dress - big confusion. I guess it is the same for AMAB people who are non-binary or cross dress they tend not to do so in general public, for me being AFAB it seems to have an added layer of confusion for people. I feel suppressed and that I had to sacrifice the clothes etc that I previoisly could wear with ease in order to transition but not transitioning also meant suppressing my true identity. I am finding it hard to cope with not being able to fully be myself. I could go by a gender neutral name and call myself non-binary to feel more freedom in expression but it is not how I identify and I would still be betraying myself. I'm depressed because of this feeling of not being able to fully express myself as a GNC trans man. I know society won't change and become understanding very night so maybe I just need to be the change and express it anyway ut it also comes with the risk of being misgendered as a women which still happens often even in gender neutral clothing. I don't have a lot of facial hair and like I said still have breats 😢

[@DRZPHD]

Thank you for sharing.

[@patriceferguson7340]

I got them too that upper rack that was from parents trying HRT to develop a daughter. Intersex/ Trans. Actually de transition reversing the parents decision that I should develop as a female they wanted. Now I have boobs I normally would not have. But dudes boobs these days enough to fill c cups. So a good way to tuck that rack and shape it more masculine without binding would be to use shapewear body molding for guys your size. Mine works great. Even helps move the fat in typically male areas.

[@pythosdegothos6181]

Do you think if crossdressing, gender bending, and or gender non conformity was more accepted, and sex based dress codes were done away with, there would not be as much as an issue when ti comes to gender issues. I have preferred "feminine" style since 5 years of age, but was shamed for being such, and up until 2 decades I hid my style preferences. I hesitate to say I am a crossdresser (except if we use the dictionary definition, which makes almost everyone crossdressers), and I have never desired to be a woman. I just like the styles, more than masculine styles. My life would be VERY MUCH easier and better if GNC was more accepted and not stigmatized.

[@fatoumata7624]

Not clear at all = what is the différence between sexual trans of group 1 and trans with AG in section 2 of the 2d group ?

[@DRZPHD]

Hi, I am sorry to hear this is not clear to you. The group #1 are people who are feminizing/masculinizing as extension of who they are, and while sexual arousal may be present, it is not essential component. Group 2 are people who who engage in this behavior due to sexual comment and may or may not also be transgender.

[@fatoumata7624]

​@@DRZPHD You tell that in group 1 some continue dressing because of sexual pleasure.

[@WarMachineSSVHoldenG8]

Great video ❤❤ . Help me to understand the difference

[@DRZPHD]

Glad it was helpful!

[@WarMachineSSVHoldenG8]

@@DRZPHD , your video have been very helpful. Appreciate all you do. Just starting my transition. You videos have made me realize I need to live my truth. And I thank u 🙏🏿

[@DawnJones-t6s]

I'm still lost. My husband came out to me as a "crossdresser" recently. He says hes secretly done it since childhood and its not sexual. He says he doesn't want to transition and he only sexually likes women. He says the clothes make him feel calm and feel right. Are you saying that he is actually considered trans? I'm new to all of this and am trying to learn. Is it ever just femanizing or is he definitely trans in some way? I don't know if he's even sure.

[@DRZPHD]

Hi. No I am not saying that when a person crossdressing its always because they are trans. IT can be, but not always. Sounds like there is still uncertainty and I would suggest to engage in therapy with a local therapist to explore more.

[@Tonyawayne1968]

I was a cross dresser but now im a trans women ive been on hormones for over 2 years or more and i am 54

[@rasmachris94]

For me it was a sexual thing at first, but i never addressed it directly as such since it was a one-time thing. Then i found myself buying cute clothes, feminizing makeup and learning how to make a more fem voice. Even though there is some doubt, the signs that i had mostly forgotten from when i was younger came bubbling to the surface and it became clearer to me that i may be trans. I say may be because I'm partially in denial still - mostly because of social pressure and fear of rejection. But the counter balance to that is: Why would I be trying to become more fem if it was purely sexual in nature? Surely at that point I'd be comfortable continuing to wear fem clothes for sexual arousal. And yet I'm taking it way further than that just for the joy of looking fem without sexual contexts or gain. So whilst there is still some doubt I'd say it's an 80-20 trans-not trans in my head. And that's about as certain as anything gets in life.

[@DRZPHD]

Thanks for sharing.

[@johnsexton7621]

I was all district in football and wore thistle pink nail polish

[@joanna62]

People who feel comfortable identifying as crossdressers would be better to use the term gender variance. Under this umbrella of gender variance there can be dysphoric and non dysphoric people. Crossdressing should be seen as an anachronistic term particularly since if women exhibit gender variance it isn't seen as crossdressing. Additionally many trans people exposed to Blanchard were stigmatized by the thought they might have a paraphilia instead of aligning with their identity.

[@DRZPHD]

Agree.

[@joanna62]

😀 your videos are helping a lot of people :)

[@hobosarepeopletoo]

Love you Dr Z!

[@clara_cross]

I think that I fall approximately (though not completely) into groups 1B, 2B, and 2C, relating to certain elements of each. I relate to 1B because this behaviour was always motivated by my incongruency between my gender and my sex assigned at birth, but there was also a distinct sexual component to it from the very beginning, even despite the very early age at which it woke up, long before puberty. Although, once puberty did roll around, that sexual component kicked into high gear and then I developed the confusion surrounding the conflation described in group 2B between my trans identity and my sexual thrill, and then that's when I started to develop the thrill/guilt cycle of group 2C, both of which really drove my "am I really trans or is this just a phase/fetish" uncertainty which has been a huge contributing factor in my taking way too long to finally decide to transition. It's been 20 years since that cycle started, and I've still not fully moved past it. I don't think I'll ever be able to fully get over that guilt cycle until after I'm on the other side of transition. However, I don't relate to the part about group 2C where you say that the crossdressing behaviour is not related to gender identity. But you did also seem to be implying that this is kind of amorphous, and that the lines aren't exactly so clear-cut as the presentation would make it sound. "We're not all little tickboxes" and all that. So I don't think that this discrepancy is inherently contradictory. I do also relate to the point that, as I've started to really embrace my trans identity and stop fighting it, and accept who I am, the sexual thrill that comes along with the crossdressing has substantially diminished as it's grown more normalized in me. It still helps in achieving orgasm, and it's still an important ingredient in the experience, but it's blended much more into the "actualization" side of things than anything else. That's not to imply that it hasn't always been involved in actualization-after all, that's where it all started-but, now that I'm no longer really "starved" for it, if that makes sense, it seems to be settling home more in actualization and less in sexuality. Also, just as a little aside, I have a transman friend who's very dear to me whom I've known for the better part of a decade now, and I think I would assess him to fall into groups 1A and 3. Oh, also, I think that this video would really benefit from chapter divisions. It would have made reviewing the relevant sections after I was done watching it the first time a lot easier. I've taken it upon myself to compose some and have left them in another comment here. I hope people can find them useful.

[@DRZPHD]

Thank you for sharing.

[@twixzy6095]

You described me and I am still uncertain if I'm trans

[@clara_cross]

@@twixzy6095 Hi there, sweetie. If it helps you at all, I started HRT (hormone replacement therapy) about four months after I made that post that you say described you, so I've been on HRT for five months now. And I can absolutely and unequivocally say that this is the single best thing I have EVER done for my mental health, my emotional health, my physical congruence, and my personal confidence, in my ENTIRE life. Like, bar none. It is absolutely no contest. I have literally never been happier. There definitely was a part of me that was still kind of doubting when I went into it, but... I decided to stop looking at it from a "negative wins" perspective. I flipped it on its head and changed my view to a "positive wins" perspective: Instead of "I think I might be trans, but I'm not sure", I shifted to "I'm not sure if I'm trans, but expressing womanhood and being seen as a woman brings me so much joy." And, from THAT perspective, it doesn't fucking matter if I'm this or that or the other thing. It makes me happy. End of. Full stop. That's all that matters. "Follow the joy", as I recently heard someone say.

[@twixzy6095]

@@clara_cross Hello, thank you for the response. I think I want to talk about this with my parents as they might provide me more clearance or can offer me advice. I have talked to some trans people online and many have similar "symptoms" than I have. I know you mention that I shouldn't ask myself "am I trans?" but that I should just be myself, but these thoughts are unsuppressable. So I am heavily questioning my gender identity and keep in mind I am only 16, which maybe adds to the doubt part of "just a phase" (although I have wanted to crossdress and look like a girl since about 7 years old; the urge has grown substantially stronger over the last month's though and my mental health is getting a bit worse). It feels great being called she / her and a girl on the internet and it gives a a huge confidence boost and euphoria rush. I also feel like this would not be accepted in the area that I live in... I really want to talk to my parents about this as I know they'd be supportive. But idk what to say: I think I might be trans? I just really want someone to talk to

[@clara_cross]

@@twixzy6095 Firstly, I just wanna clarify that I didn't mean to say that you "should" anything. The only thing I think you "should" do is whatever you feel is right for you. That said, those are defo some pretty trans things to say, girl. :P Cis people don't really struggle with these sorts of questions or feelings. Not for very long anyway. Sounds like you've been dealing with this for half your life. I'm not here to tell you what to do, but that sounds pretty trans to me. "Phases" don't really last nine years and counting. Keep watching Z's videos, though! They helped me A LOT! Also, know that there will more than likely NEVER come a time when you'll ever feel 100% certain. That trope is just that: a trope. Very few of us ever go into this with absolute 100%edness. We don't typically find that until afterwards.

[@SarahjTaylor-cd6nz]

Hi there I am trying to live I have just lost my daughter I have had a bad start to live what do you think of what do you think I am a transgender women just to live again I only have my dad I have been told all my life I have been told that.

[@Johnny_T779]

It really made me think about famous cross-dressers like Jeffree Star and F1nnster. Lots of people are confused when these men say they are comfortable with their male gender but love the feminine aesthetic. I knew men like that, it doesn't surprise me. I felt the difference when I tried to feminise myself for goth parties before transitioning (I am a trans man), I really felt like I was cross-dressing and even though I looked cool, I felt uncomfortable. It reminded me of every time I had to wear girls clothes in my childhood for occasions (uniform in the choir, graduation ceremonies...) and felt disguised. A good way to make cis people understand what's like to be trans is to make them wear opposite gender clothing and ask them how do they feel... Then ask them to imagine what it would feel like to dress like that for years. But yes, femboys and studgirls are a thing, and often they are not trans.

[@clarissanavarro2762]

Many people have a difficult time differentiating between Gender Identity, and Gender presentation. F1nnster's gender Identity is man, ... his gender presentation though is woman. His behavior is not exacctly feminine though, so yes, the Aesthetic can be considered feminine, even as his behavior is masculine. Gender is complex.

[@FrozEnbyWolf150]

There's also the fact that gendered clothing in terms of men's and women's fashion has reversed over the past century, and will continue to change as time goes by. There's a lot of variation in gendered clothing throughout history, and across different cultures today. My go to example, look up the childhood photos of FDR. Yes, that's him.

[@clarissanavarro2762]

@@FrozEnbyWolf150 I think gendered clothing is just a bunch of bullshit. We would be better off with no gender restricttions on clothes. Then people could wear whatever they want. While women are free to basically wear anything though, Men will still resist. Homophobia being a constant concern for men. "Hell no I am not wearing a skirt.... I'm not gay"

[@DRZPHD]

Thanks for sharing.

[@fatoumata7624]

Star is not a transvestite but camp gay. He does not dress for sex, nor to relieve a pressure. He dresses because he has a strange taste.

[@jwenting]

Much more balanced than the original, and much more focus on the phenomenon being harmless rather than a sign of sexual deviancy (which, though unintentional, did bleed through quite a bit in the original in my opinion). Ironically I started wearing feminine clothing (especially skirts) not primarily because I am transgender (though looking back on things the idea may have had something to do with it) and definitely not for sexual gratification (it doesn't come into play at all), but for purely practical reasons. Having chronic lower back and knee injuries, it is at times impossible for me to pull on a pair of trousers or even shorts (and the weather here being what it is, shorts are simply not an option for a large part of the year anyway). But wrapping a towel or sheet around my waste allowed me to open the door to take delivery of groceries (when I'm in that state I also can't drive, I can barely walk, so depend on deliveries for everything, for some reason the delivery drivers don't like nudists). Looking for something a bit more stylish I ordered me a few kilts, found them too heavy and cumbersome so ordered some sarongs and wrap skirts instead. And they're so much more comfortable than jeans or slacks, I dreaded the days I had to go back to the office and put on those to meet the dress code for male employees.

[@fatoumata7624]

Sexual déviant bases on fabrics is harless and indeed dressing for sex is a sexual deviancy.

[@DRZPHD]

Glad to hear the clarity came through.

[@jwenting]

@@fatoumata7624 you misunderstood: many people think crossdressing is a precursor to, or even part of, pedophilia, rape, etc. etc.

[@fatoumata7624]

@@jwenting Many people smoke too !

[@rebeccasam3434]

I hate the conflation among bigots between women and men who have a sexual preference...hell, I'll even see those men claiming they're trans 🙄 Sexualizing marginalized groups is a go-to move for facists of all stripes. This was all well said. I doubt myself ENDLESSLY but at least I know it has nothing to do with sex, so I don't have to worry about THAT or have that complexity. I can't remember if I saw the first video/what it was (probably?) but this is good. The DSM is such a mess on multiple topics... At least it generally stumbles in the right direction, thought the monsters are trying to slip their bigotry into it.

[@DRZPHD]

Thank you for sharing, this is a complex topic often abused in a wrong way.

[@MKlol2]

I am NB, doodling artists, also I really like emo/goth/punk style. So I often combine feme and masc garments. I do it for aestetics and feeling hot. Andwhat to say, guys garments are mostly boring and much more covering body shape to straight lines. T-shirt, trousers and that is. Also there is almost nothing leather or vinyl for guys. It's a "women material". I see women wear leather pants or moto jackets, but guys are banned wearing them, because it's gay stereotype. Topcrops? Cutethings? Instant death in my country. But thanks to nature, balls failed to make me huge guy, 5 05 height. So I can choose even boots. But whats bad, it's hard to not being fat.

[@derekdolcy5839]

😊✋❤️ good after noon friends

[@wigglyduck3690]

I don’t know if that’s something anyone else has experienced too, but first of all I am gay/bi trans masculine. I wasn’t aware of gender incongruence in myself until a few years ago (I am in my late 20s now). Since I was in college (that’s also around when I started dating as a cis girl), I began to feel sexual pleasure from the concept of someone in a female body but also with a penis. So that includes but is not limited to some trans women. I eventually started getting sexually aroused by fem boys as well. So any category that falls under “the concept” and it didn’t have to be a real person. I’d rather not to masturbate to real people if possible because I don’t want to fetishize or objectify them. So for several years I continued on like that until I tried a few things and realized that I had a strong desire to have a penis. I didn’t have obvious gender dysphoria from childhood, but I have always been somewhat gender neutral or masculine, so when I finally tried going outside with a passable appearance and got mistaken as a dude I felt what others call gender euphoria. I’m usually attracted to masculine men, so I don’t know how to dissect the whole sexuality thing for myself. Why I can’t stop watching femboys and trans women. Why I like that over straight up gay porn and so on. I feel like, with the topic of this video, if I were a female assigned male at birth, it makes more sense but I’m the other way around. So this whole time (until I started connecting dots and figured I was trans) I thought I was fetishizing certain groups of people or I was a pervert, but it’s also true that, though I have a couple of friends who are trans women, I was never attracted to them or super interested in their private matters like transition and sex life, just as I won’t with most women in my life. They are just friends to me. So that also furthered my confusion. My inclination in self pleasure have always pointed to my desire to have a penis, and perhaps a full male body. I’m 90% sure I’m trans masc now, but sometimes my sexuality confuses me a lot and puts me into a state of self doubt, like I might just be making everything up to cover my feeling of guilt or shame. I don’t know many trans masc people who are also bi or gay to begin with, so I just really feel like there may be no one else who go through or understand this weird interplay of gender and sexuality. One way of looking at it which may make sense to me is that I am projecting what I want to be/think I should be in those people or fictions because 1) I am pre transition and have a female body and 2) I lean more toward a passive role during sex. I never got to talk to this with anyone including my counselor because the appointments were about my gender identity and I was not comfortable talking this in depth about my sex life. I’m just so confused…

[@DRZPHD]

Thank you for sharing.

[@derekdolcy5839]

Agreed 💯😂 Dr PHz.🥰❤️👍👍

[@DRZPHD]

Glad to hear!

[@dezmod1644]

Id call it dressing how i like, femme and masculine in one body, i think the social systems rely on putting people in the binary. Id say, be you in all your glory

[@LaHayeSaint]

Dr Z -- Off topic again, but an emergency arose. A trans woman was in a restaurant and asked the bar staff where the toilets were. A woman X with her 11 year old daughter on another table interjected, "You can't use the restroom as you're a man..." I thought, how dare she. How arrogant, how rude! Since when has anyone got to ask permission in a public place to use public toilets? I would have ignored her and just used the ladies' loos, but would have started a video on my phone, anticipating a sexual bigot who would escalate. If she followed me in, I would still use the loos. If she started banging on the door or creating a disturbance, I would still use voice record and call 911. And if she attacked me, I would defend myself using proportional defence. The excuse X made was that "it made her daughter feel uncomfortable!" Really? Rather, she meant it was against her twisted philosophy and therefore you couldn't do it because she said so. X was an arrogant bully, but I wouldn't waste my breath as you never get anywhere presenting logical arguments to sexual bigots. This matter of trans women using ladies' powder rooms is a recurring theme and needs to be addressed, when confronted by sexually bigoted women who won't back off.

[@DRZPHD]

Sorry to hear this happened to you. I think all bathrooms should be gender neutral.

[@LaHayeSaint]

@@DRZPHD Dr Z -- If bigot X had quizzed a cis woman, she would be told to "F**k Off." If she touched me I might have to invoke self-defence. I would have preferred to leave her talking to herself. If I need to go to the loo, I'm not going to ask permission, and transphobic bigots can try, if they dare, to stop me.

[@LaHayeSaint]

@Jane's Musings Jane -- The Sunak government in the UK in 2022 looked at the question of neutral gender loos in new public builds and craftily said they might be included "only if there was room?" That is a carte blanche to builders not to include them, and they will make damned sure that "unfortunately, there was no room." Trans women must therefore use female facilities as they are women and not men. A trans woman could be humiliated or raped if she used men's loos.men's loos are an unsafe space for (trans) women. If (trans) women use disabled toilets, they are preventing more needy (disabled) users from accessing toilet facilities, which is wrong.

[@LaHayeSaint]

@Jane's Musings Jane -- It would be easier still for all trans women to use the ladies. Cis women are no more in danger of attack from trans women as they are from cis women, or from a cis male who lies in wait (to attack all women) in the ladies. It is all in the mind, with a very strong transphobic agenda.

[@pupstarproduction15]

Very interesting Because i can definitely see what you mean that even if i do CD for the pleasure. But there is always like this confusion about if there is more. I do not help to have skitzofrenia and constantly hear voices. But i will say it definitely have given me some food for thought. I do wonder how do you become more sure that i have or dont have gender disforia.

[@DRZPHD]

Thanks for sharing and time combined with small steps are ways to help know more.

[@pupstarproduction15]

@@DRZPHD Thank you so much for the help dr.

[@anneallison6402]

In my case I began crosdressing when I was 11 y/o just a little before I knew what sexual pleasure was but ever since I can remember I wanted to wear girl clothes and going the fem way even coming to wish I was born a girl so I could do it this before transgender people were a thing

[@DRZPHD]

Thank you for sharing.

[@ColaSpandex]

I feel the urge to comment on several aspects of this video and I could easily go into great depth but then hardly anyone will read (in my experience). So I will focus on one basic thing for now. Semantics (and how it relates to classification). This isn't really a criticism but I would suggest that there is further room for improvement here. For one thing I find it very interesting that you seem to make an association between "transvestism" and "autogynephilia" (correct me if I misinterpreted). To someone like me, who is acutely aware of the disparities between British and American English (partly because I am British and partly because I am interested in linguistics), I can only describe this as a mistake. As far as I'm aware Brits and Americans tend to agree on the basic meaning of "autogynephilia" but the word "transvestite" is a very different matter. And this is just one example of the linguistic minefield that you are now standing in (seemingly unawares). I also get the distinct impression that you're going out of your way to stress that autogynephilia is perfectly OK and not to be frowned upon as misogynistic in nature. My gut feeling is that this is at least part of the reason for the remake. I just wish I had seen the original video. It is important though, either way. It has a lot to do with the aforementioned semantic disparity relating to the word "transvestite". I can probably help you navigate this minefield if you're interested but I'll leave it there for now.

[@DRZPHD]

Thank you for sharing your thoughts. Autogynophilia and transvestism are seen similarly as both entail sexual arousal with autogynphelia taking it further to convey arousal not just to crossdressing but the idea of self as feminine. It's ok if you do not see autogynophilia as perfectly OK, I understand that my views formed by my background and may not resonate with all. I do strongly feel it is a sexual preference. Thank you for your input.

[@plastictouch6796]

I don't think I fall exactly into any of these categories. But maybe I didn't genderbend at a young age because of massive self repression or just the idea of gender didn't play as strong a role in my mind as it does now. Definitely not a sex thing for me, being gendered correctly during sex is just affirmation of my identity.

[@rogerbober8916]

I can't like this video enough.

[@FrozEnbyWolf150]

Here's a tip for how to dress nonbinary. Step 1: Be nonbinary. Step 2: Wear clothes.

[@DRZPHD]

Thanks for sharing.

[@michaelaandrew9038]

It's the shame and the hate people put on ALL THE LBGTQ 😡

[@monicaperez2843]

My concern is those who claim to be transgender when they are really doing it for sexual satisfaction, dragging their wives and girlfriends into their sexual fantasy. I agree the shame factor causes them not to be honest and upfront about their sexual fetish with their wives (before marrying) and girlfriends (before they get serious). Thank you for your clarification.

[@DRZPHD]

Yes it’s important to understand if it’s a case of sexual preference or gender Dysphoria or both.

[@AdrictaTDT-Twitch]

Can you give an explanation of this? It would be really nice of you

[@joanna62]

Some who are gender variant with strong sexual motivation try to remove stigma by identifying under the trans moniker. However as Dr Z says you can discover later on that there was dysphoria underneath in some of those cases. If someone begins to express gender variance at or after puberty it's a stronger bet that it's sexually motivated rather than identity motivated.

[@monicaperez2843]

@@AdrictaTDT-Twitch I think Dr. Z is talking about those with a sexual fetish, who cross dress as a part of expressing their sexuality but call themselves "transgender," because many people are very hostile to fetishists.

[@That_dark_ranger]

I would be Interested in finding out what percentage of your viewers identify with either transgender , transexual or non binary , if there is any way or finding out ??

[@DRZPHD]

That’s an interesting question. I don’t think there is a way of finding out. What I can tell you is this. Many of my clients age 50 and up align themselves with transsexual term and have a hard time understanding non binary identity. Others who are younger align with transgender.

[@personwhoexists8684]

​@@DRZPHD maybe I'm just a weirdo , but I'm 23 and I like and use "transsexual", not transgender.... My reasoning is like, I didn't/am not altering my gender.... I am altering my sex (ie hormones, and etc). There fore transsexual, to me , just makes so much more sense and the word transgender almost feels like an insult if aome one tries to apply it to me at Least

[@DRZPHD]

@@personwhoexists8684not a weirdo at all. Many younger adults identify as transsexual too.

[@Grimmsborith1992]

@@DRZPHD as to how to know which percentage of your audience identifies as Trans, Cis, Non-Binary, unsure or not willing to share, you may actually try one of the community Polls youtube allows. Even though it is not an “official academic statistic“ as this Poll may exceed your subscriber-range, but it may give an indication of the rough percentages. You may actually put in the discription of the poll that you are looking explicitly for subscriber-only-feedback, which might help keep the percentages more aligned with your audience. I actually started looking into the whole transgender topic when i participated in a Poll and my answer was in the 3% part of “yes“ for changing the sex permanently without possibilty to return. (I expected a yes in the high 40-ish Percent.) And through the research i found out that i am, in fact, trans (and came to accept that really fast). But i am at the very Start of my Journey, so nothing has “really“ changed for me.

[@RonnieClaudy]

Iam a man and I love wearing women leather boots and gloves

[@fatoumata7624]

I started in group 2. With AG (I wanted to be female in sexuality). Over time, dressing sex became less powerful and I started to want to kill myself BECAUSE I was not female (looks like gender dysphoria). I have no mental problem but I feel symptoms of dysphoria = irritability, desperation, sadness, anxiety and apathy. Very labile. I suspect I always had gender dysphoria and that I used sexuality to sooth the inner pressure linked to gender problem. Hence when sexuality was less efficient to sooth the suffering, I stopped dressing for sex, I mean stopped sex. And stopped living (no sex, no love, no job, no social life...). I spent all mental energy to think about trans. To arrive at the conclusion that I was likely trans. Still do not know what to do with this. Ils have taken full hrt for 3.5 years in the last 5 years, I spent 13 years in therapy with 5 shrinks. I had 4 shrinks in the same period of 4 years! All the 4 knew about trans and told I was trans. My only goal in life = being a woman. Problem = I know it is not possible as only females can be women. I am not helped by my anti lgbt father who tells that he prefers me dead than trans. I live with him. Never left my parents...my mother died 8 years ago. I felt relieved from a pressure when she died as she was telling she would kill myself of she sees me dressed as a woman. By the way, she wanted a girl. Not because she liked kids (she hated kids and wanted no kid). Because in her mind a girl never drops her mother while a boy goes away to take care of another woman...

[@DRZPHD]

Thank you for sharing and I wish you all the best.

[@marcielynn4886]

Autogynophelia is NOT trans.

[@derekdolcy5839]

😊😀👍👍😍❤️❤️💜💛💛🌈🌈🌈🌈

[@fatoumata7624]

It is not after but auto gynephilia.

[@DRZPHD]

Hi, yes thats what I discuss in the video, autogynophilia.

[@fatoumata7624]

​@@DRZPHD I know but you tell after. May be because in Russian you tell aftamat ?

[@fatoumata7624]

​@@DRZPHD аyто and not афто.

[@fatoumata7624]

Is the necklace part of an erotic transvestism ?

[@DRZPHD]

?????????

[@fatoumata7624]

@@DRZPHD It looks like christamass decoration !