D&D Stories: They Insta-Killed my BBEG

[@XPtoLevel3]

www.patreon.com/runesmith/posts? Check out Logan's patreon!!

[@theskyidiot8419]

but hes a big weenie

[@thatonezoey334]

@@theskyidiot8419 You are a big weenie >:(

[@kurokitsune1939]

I wanna marry Logan’s glorious brain.

[@michaelmarksman743]

Imma sub to him once my paycheck comes in. My friends say I’m Logan in personality; I see what they mean now. xD

[@runedoom]

so a fellow rune master? interesting

[@zeterzero4356]

"Huh, guess I'm a druid now." *Keeps Walking*

[@Shepper99]

I guess he never stops, huh?

[@gafeleon9032]

@@Shepper99 nope, I guess he'll just keep walking south

[@zaphosnz3913]

@@Shepper99 you got a boneclaw? I bet it won't survive this.

[@Shepper99]

@@zaphosnz3913 It gonna find another party and it won't miss ya.

[@bryanna-1771]

"Oh, look, we just killed a Boneclaw." *Still Walking*

[@thejamaicanempire3561]

"I'm going South.... forever" How to do a backstory in one line.

[@davide887]

I always do short ass backstories it's easy too tell simple and fun for dms too fuck with

[@Raptorman0205]

"I quite like going south...somehow, it feels like going downhill"

[@XGMPinachet]

that's Aria Stark's ending

[@gulgaffel]

and then the dm has to change the entire campaign so everything happens to be along the path to south.

[@Aja-e5j]

@@davide887 well, if you make it too short then the DM will be annoyed because there's nothing to work with XD

[@chimerazeta1714]

"Hey man, you wanna be a druid?" I died at this part

[@Metalhammer1993]

"aaahh" "uaargh" "aaah" "uaargh" was even better. i laughed my balls off mate^^

[@malcolmpayne3598]

"I'm going south... Forever."

[@Mr_Jumbles]

Tommy Chong just as an immortal druid: "eh man you wana like... turn into animals? it's pretty far out."

[@lorekeeper685]

Oh where that may be?

[@Davernn]

Sounds like a drug deal

[@irok1]

Door: *3 Hours* BBEG: *Instakill*

[@Raptorman0205]

The magic of D&D in 5 words

[@gus-um4nl]

My dm once ran a sentient door encounter, and it had like 3 hitpionts. Me, a new player playing a lv 1 barbarian, usd up my rage on it. I was mad

[@mirrormimi]

@@gus-um4nl On the other side there's us, who spent a RIDICULOUS amount of time thinking of how to enter a fenced building, only for our barbarian to VERY CALMLY skip the low fence and walk inside.

[@DarthSidian]

At least it wasn't as bad as the Door Puzzle.

[@sethsybrandy3218]

Bless.

[@chesscankill]

truth

[@ChitenBugMan]

And the door was never even locked to begin with

[@graceelrod2283]

My god 😂

[@DragonaxFilms]

Was about to like, but this comment is at 666 and it deserves to stay there.

[@MagicBiber]

Wait...did Logan play a small person pushing another small person and a precious ring off a cliff? That seems more like the end of a quest, not the start of one, to be honest. He's essentially playing a stoned Frodo and *I'm very okay with this.*

[@defensivekobra3873]

That was an fucking accident u monster (Sorry if im rude)

[@fire99xyz]

Shit MagicBiber? Das man dich hier findet :D

[@defensivekobra3873]

@@fire99xyz *intelligble Swedish screaming* Plez speak English Will ya'

[@fire99xyz]

defenseive kobra just recognized magicbiber from his KZbin vids

[@MagicBiber]

@@fire99xyz Ich mag D&D! ;)

[@clericofchaos1]

My group one shot the tarrasque the first time we encountered it, and this was 3.5. Back when the tarrasque was actually a threat to a high level party. It's kind of a long story, but the short version is we had found a wizard's spell book really early on in the game (like back when we were level 2 or 3) and it was a book that contained nothing but teleportation spells. My guy was a wizard and he spent most of his free time and money studying the book and copying the spells down. Level 20 comes around, the dm goes "Ok, I've been waiting for this a long time. I've never gotten to use this creature before, no one has ever survived long enough to be a threat to it. You guys are going to fight the tarrasque." There were 2 veterans in our group that acted surprised and happy but most of us were noobs back then, didn't know what it was, we were just like "Ok, cool. Whatever." So, we go on this quest, find this thing, and when we find it it's asleep in it's lair. We take one look at the sleeping kaiju and are like "nope", just as the group is leaving though I remember I have a version of teleportation circle I can cast that has no size limit. Basically draw the circle and as long as whatever fits in the circle you can teleport it but only to places on the same plane. So, I grab the rogue give him some chalk and tell him to just go draw a circle around the thing. He makes his stealth check, beats the tarrasque's senses and draws the circle and I teleport it into the sun...still the same plane of existence, so it counts. There's no save or anything either (because I don't think it was ever meant to be used offensively), just whatever is in the circle gets teleported. So, we one shot the tarrasque and the dm was super frustrated and we laughed at him and had a good time.

[@rezonpokemon3854]

now thats a way to finish a quest.

[@DavidTanisDreams]

clericofchaos1 You opened a portal to the sun? And the planet survived that heat? Just saying.

[@Bluecho4]

@@DavidTanisDreams No, they _teleported_ the Tarrasque. There's a difference between opening portals and teleportation.

[@yeetsmcgee5446]

Well, recently in a game my friend was dming for 2 of my friends and I, we were all level 3 and he had us face an indestructible mirage tarrasque...the only way to beat it was literally to cast dispel magic because the desert we were in was magical...our sorcerer didn't have it...an NPC came along and destroyed it....

[@XenithShadow]

I mean technically the tarrasque isn't dead. If the sun deals fire damage then the tarrasque doesn't even get damaged by the surface of the sun. If the sun can actual damage the tarrasaque all it does is deal a bunch of non lethal damage to the tarrasque as it can only be killed by wish in 3.5.

[@Fornax42]

Logan never ceases to amaze me. He truly is a doofy, creative genius

[@yearnie4207]

1 shots a boneclaw. Cant open a door for 3 hour

[@dakotabarnard787]

He mastered the "life just be like that sometimes" lifestyle.

[@gabrialsperka422]

I wanna like this comment, but it's already at 69 likes ;-;

[@MagicBiber]

That's one hell of a honeymoon...

[@skycrafter2042]

Yummy

[@empagaming2341]

Again, creativity is possibly the best weapon in D&D.

[@rainingcomplete3018]

Empa5taman It most certainly is

[@justsomedude4547]

This is proven by that one time I made thermite and used it to burn through a jail cell

[@toddmorningstar4206]

In a 3.5 campaign as an artificer, I would use indisputable possession on big rocks and teleport them to my palm whilst holding out my open hand faced down to drop it onto enemies.

[@jenbooob]

@@toddmorningstar4206 I see you've taken the dm spell of "rocks fall and everyone dies"

[@greenmind3488]

This story basically defines the best parts of DnD. Good on you Jacob for gritting your teeth and allowing this amazingness ro happen!

[@d9hh803]

I'm pretty sure the bone claw is going to have a phobia of logan by the end of the campaign.

[@kurokitsune1939]

Danut Neagu Dammitloganaphobia?

[@bookworm3696]

i would think it would be gnomophobia

[@AnthanKrufix]

"Oh no not again." ~ Petunias

[@frozenlizard7738]

Now all I can think of is this terrifying monster screaming/ running for its life the second it sees logan

[@gamingman2720]

Frozen Lizard just no not that gnome again

[@2MeterLP]

My players quest: Kill an evil wizard their solution: Cast both polymorph and haste on one of them and let the hyperactive T-Rex chew the wizard to death. An encounter rated "deadly" solved without losing a single hitpoint. Not sure if I love or hate my players.

[@D.Dragon]

Polymorph's a stupidly powerful spell for reasons like this, and True Polymorph even more so. There's a reason why Legendary Resistance has to exist and there's a specific rule in place for handling players' polymorphing themselves in ways the DM can't handle.

[@gatoneko]

A simple solution to having them turn into a T-Rex is to basically say do they even know what a T-Rex looks like, are they even in your game, and if the answer is no, then no they can't turn into something they never seen or heard about.

[@2MeterLP]

@@gatoneko Yeah well, they did fight a T-Rex in the feywild. We play in the forgotten realms setting, dinosaurs do exist in that world and it was a really cool fight.

[@deman182]

Speaking of Polymorph cant you turn an ally into a I don't know a Tarrasque for example?

[@2MeterLP]

@@deman182 no, only beasts which CR is equal or lower than the targets level. T-Rex is the strongest beast at CR7. EDIT: Beasts are normal animals and their giant versions, Tarrasque is a monstrosity, so not elligeble

[@eareandilthemariner9361]

Logan: Kill BBEG with a flood and 8 snakes while one inch tall. Me: That’s got to be the best pirate I’ve ever seen.

[@ethanreads8504]

The thing is; Boneclaws are psychically attached to their MASTER. Have fun Logan, you just annoyed the hell out of its owner.

[@wx7fm]

Well, if the master knows that they own the Boneclaw

[@ethanreads8504]

@@wx7fm True. There is that element to it.

[@xleonhardt4416]

@@socail2 that player would have to be pretty damn evil for that to happen. Boneclaws don't attach to good characters. If the person they are attached to becomes good then the Boneclaw finds another master.

[@megaman3001]

@@xleonhardt4416 actually the boneclaw dies for good in that situation. heres the info from the book on its immortality: Limited Immortality. A boneclaw can't be destroyed while its master lives. No matter what happens to a boneclaw's body, it re-forms within hours and returns to whatever duty its master assigned. The boneclaw can serve only evil. If its master finds redemption or sincerely turns away from the path of evil, the boneclaw is permanently destroyed.

[@feartheghus]

Noah McArthur wait, what if the master is good, what does the bone claw do then?

[@fireknight4151]

I guess you can say that boneclaws was "Sleeping with the liches"

[@MagicBiber]

*Hot.*

[@moiramain2k]

Luck bugger if the liches be hot!

[@MrJlong]

I hear the sound of applause.

[@nucleargandhi2709]

Fuck you, have your fucking like.

[@gamingman2720]

George Gebhard best and worst pun

[@Blizzic]

They insta-killed my Big BonEclaw Guy

[@FourElemental]

Hahahahahahahahaha It's funny because Blizzic capitalized the parts of the words to spell the acrynom BBEG

[@znorel1895]

I thought it was Big Bad Evil Guy

[@jonathanmartin8716]

Ditto

[@CydonianKryptid]

@@znorel1895 Woooosh

[@fifthfire_4474]

Tobleronz r/woooosh

[@alexandercross9081]

This reminds me of this one time the DM built an encounter with some super lizardfolk, and he thought oh, it might be too hard because half the party can't make it tonight. So I just walk up, and my DM has forgotten I can speak draconic, so I make myself as intimidating as possible, and do my best to give the indication, I'm their superior officer, and it works well enough to get them into a close formation, and I stealthy lift my staff of fire, and blast them with it, killing 3 of them, and their lizard hound, outright, then I throw down a stinking cloud because we got to roll initiative, and I got a nat 20, and have +1 higher dex mod than any of them, as such all seven of them die without making an action

[@rainingcomplete3018]

Grand Admiral Thrawn You fool. Keep them as minions.

[@alexandercross9081]

@@rainingcomplete3018 I was not in a position to recruit at the time, since then I am, as my character has discovered not only is he of draconic heritage, said draconic heritage is from the Nidhogg, the original dragon in setting, father to dragon, and god to all reptiles, the plan is to orchestrate a coup, and pull his worshipers out from under him, on the premise a boss that has at an absolute worst case scenario, minimal interest in eating you, and is willing to put a good word in with the Allfather on your behalf, is superior to one who will more than likely consume your corpse when you die, and then consume your soul for all eternity

[@demonzabrak]

@@alexandercross9081 your DM didn’t know how initiative works apparently.

[@alexandercross9081]

@@demonzabrak surprise round, and a follow up via nat 20 intative might not be in the 3.5 rulebook but definitely qualified for rule of cool

[@demonzabrak]

@@alexandercross9081 there is no surprise round when both parties are aware of the other. Your first attack before rolling initiative was the first round. They should have then acted in sequence, with the rolls below yours happening that round, and any rolls higher then yours happening on the second round.

[@akhaa3534]

He started walking and everything went south...

[@juliendacoolien3454]

Best comment.

[@sylph8005]

Underrated comment

[@jakerambow7030]

"I set it up, you guys are in a TAVERN!" "Woman was in another TAVERN!" "You guys happen upon another TAVERN!"

[@bigbsumm7501]

more ale!

[@zichithefox4781]

Hey, the best part about taverns is coming up with names. The Far Oak, Broken Lantern Tavern and Inn, The Brass Bottle, Captain's Nook.

[@BloodyBay]

@@zichithefox4781 I remember playing in another airman's D&D campaign while I was stationed at Keesler. The town we started in had four taverns: The Cracked Mug, Handkel's Pub, the Gentleman's Alehouse and the Dagger's Blood. Guess which tavern had at least _two or three_ bar fights _every frickin' night._

[@zichithefox4781]

@@BloodyBay Hah! That is outstanding! My guess is The Cracked Mug, but I can easily see a rogue stirring up trouble at a place called The Dagger's Blood.

[@BloodyBay]

​@@zichithefox4781 It was the Dagger's Blood. ;-) Naturally, that's where the DM started us. The local Thieves Guild sent some goons to intimidate our party into staying out of their business at the docks, my Fighter responded by smashing their speaker's face in with a warhammer, and our party's Thief stole a good-sized cask of ale from the Dagger's Blood and log-rolled it down the street, while my Fighter and the other Fighter were up to their armpits in thieves and local yokels; I had the good sense to thump the dumb townies with the _pommel_ of my warhammer, while the Thieves Guild goons got my warhammer's "business end". So our party drank well that night! ^_^

[@thebluewizard3094]

No one: The Travelocity gnome: I guess I'll kill the most powerful being in existence

[@hobg5786]

The Travelocity Gnome met someone who was like "wanna be a druid" and they were like "sure" Then they encountered someone who said "Wanna kill God?"

[@lukeengelhardt6454]

So wait... They’re a female half-elf that dresses in male drag that dresses in Tiefling drag? That’s like... four drags.

[@alvesh129]

He was a halfling to begin with not a half elf they were both tiny peeps lol

[@chainattack6412]

What a Drag

[@nebs6888]

@@chainattack6412 oh sweet summer child

[@shiny_owl9171]

@@nebs6888 I think he made a joke and isnt actually asking what drag is

[@nebs6888]

@@shiny_owl9171 no

[@DaedhrotheElf]

my dm mapped out a really cool boss fight with a fade spider in a lair. he was very excited about us fighting it. our drow rolled high enough to understand what the spider was communicating and she would mimick the sounds back. long story short she was able to convince it to be her pet. now we have a pet spider and a salty dm

[@mimirudoll6705]

LOVE IT! 🤣

[@ROYBGP]

If I were the dm, I'd be so happy.

[@zephyrstrife4668]

and I know why the DM is salty... They were expecting to have a fun, tense fight that would have you all talking endlessly about the time you fought this big, creepy spider but when it came down to the wire you all won... but no, you just had to go and turn it into a pet... A good DM wants to help players get awesome scenes, a great DM rolls with the punches and makes a great story that makes the players think they had planned for this all along.

[@infinitejellyfish1591]

Lolth would be proud ^^

[@pencilbender]

@@zephyrstrife4668 and the best dm also has fun when all his plans turn into shett

[@silvertheelf]

Logan:”I’m just some random adventurer...” *Kills a bone claw 8 times jar jar binks style* Logan:”totally not some evil mastermind who was replaced by count dooku because everyone hated me... totally”

[@kapitan19969838]

I understood that reference!

[@christopherfleetwood5252]

@@kapitan19969838 And I understood THAT reference

[@Dozerz]

@@christopherfleetwood5252 what reference

[@christopherfleetwood5252]

@@Dozerz avengers (2012)

[@twistedblast5253]

At least he wasn't killed by a naked screaming hafling riding a Bassett hound

[@mr.potato2223]

Ok what the fuck happened

[@Suo_kongque]

mr. potato some weird shit

[@mr.potato2223]

Now I know the story of mud the lizardfolk

[@acorns-r-us]

Booze bottles are basically flasks of oil so the first bout of fire damage would be on average 5 for firebolt plus 5 per bottle of booze. Assuming a bar has at least 20 oil-flask sized bottlea of flammable liquid, that is about 105 fire damage. I dunno how high the cliff was but if it was for MAXIMUM SPOOK FACTOR then let's assume 100 ft above sea (in this case river) level. Since bludgeoning is 1d6 per 10 ft thats at most 60 damage, average 30. Mechanically, this is hilarious. 👍

[@jordanertz3034]

What about the damage from getting smacked by debris from the tavern?

[@freindlycommentator1710]

Steam explosions are something unnacounted for

[@gabrialsperka422]

You also forgot the gunpowder explosion Jacob mentioned

[@LightPink]

I don't think you layer 100s of flasks of oil to insta kill anything that touches it

[@Sky-yb4jg]

This was funny to watch. I have had a similar thing happen with me side the fact I was pretty much Logan. I was playing a campaign as a half elf druid from a steampunk style world that was dragged into a different world by gods to fight fallen gods. Now my dm let me have a special feat which he later regretted that let me turn anything into a familiar as long as I defeated it and got a high enough roll. So before I met up with my party I had entered a Cave with Shadow's in it. Three to be exact. At this point in time I had moon beam which is the most op druid spell ever which does radiant damage which Shadow's are weak to. So I instantly vaporize two of them and get a nat 20 to turn the last one into my familiar thinking "Hey why not." So I pull up the stat sheet and attacks for the Shadows and there attack is called strength drain that, well, drains the strength. The thing is strength gets to zero while using strength drain it instantly kills the target.. and any humanoids killed by this are revived as a Shadow in 1d4 hours if I remember correctly. Now I am sure you can see where this is going. So me and my part of four including me are heading into a dungeon to fight our first fallen god. After a hard dungeon where I haven't used anything but spells we get to the boss chamber and begin the fight with this fallen god which has the stats of a young red dragon, may I add we are all around level five or six at this time. We begin the fight and the fallen god instantly makes the cleric which had already been focused by the undead in the dungeon start making death saves. I rolled super low so I was going last. The paladin and the bard attack the fallen god and do almost nothing to it. It then gets to my turn. I am here with no spells left and so I say "Might as well bring the Shadows in" with a sigh thinking we were about to be killed. The eight shadows popped up and attacked the fallen god bringing there strength down to zero and killing it instantly. All bosses after were immune to strength drain

[@codyrhodes2473]

Nano There’s an easy way to fix this as a DM lol It’ called Strength Drain, meaning it’s moving somewhere else, not just being destroyed. The shadows suck up a FALLEN GOD’S life essence and immediately turn against the party. Take a snack/piss break while I write stats up and we’ll come back to this in 10 minutes. There’s always a way, if you’re a good DM lol

[@IdoZemach]

@@codyrhodes2473 This is not a good fix IMO. You shouldn't bend the rules when you see fit because a character is too OP - your suggestion might make sense if the DM decided to rule that's how shadows work beforehand, but if he changes the rules of shadows afterwards, it's just pointlessly cruel. The REAL problem, as OP said, was that he has a WAAAAY overpowered feat. The DM should sit with the player and adjust the feat to make it more balanced, unless everyone in the table okay with OP being overpowered, in which case they can just do whatever. But pulling your player's legs is never a good solution. I had a game in which everyone had tons of homebrew overpowered abilities, I (a wizard) had a staff of magi, our ranger had the ability to manipulate gravity at will, etc etc, and all of that by level 5. We ended up scratching that game entirely and starting at level 1, this time with balanced characters, and so far I think we're having more fun.

[@codyrhodes2473]

Ido Zemach Ido Zemach He has a way overpowered feat. There’s no fixing that in the moment. How do you know thats not how shadows worked prior to this situation? Have you seen shadows eat a fallen god before? No? Oh, okay. It’s a new senario. Maybe when I designed the fallen god, i ruled that his power would go to the creature that slayed him. I can bend the rules there, right? Cause I created the monster myself from scratch? I never changed the way shadows work, and from a character standpoint you shouldn’t and wouldn’t know “how shadows work.” You would simply know you feel weaker after encountering them. The mechanics of that is a mystery to you in character and frankly, out of character because again the DM decides how these things work, not a book. Your DM bends the rules when they see fit all the time. What the actual fuck do you think the DM screen is for? It nullifies and creates natural ones or twenties based on the situation. It exists for the single purpose of letting the DM control the entire game from the guise of random chance. You don’t want true chance to run your games, and deep down you know random chance doesn’t run your games; you’re just upset with me because I pulled the curtain back and you saw Oz.

[@StephenHutchison]

@@codyrhodes2473 Seems like a cheap fix to me. I'd probably not stick around a game where that kind of adjustment happens... if the GM gives you something OP, then the GM has to come up with something that doesn't reek of metagaming to make it NOT be OP.

[@codyrhodes2473]

Stephen Metagaming: Characters acting on player knowledge. This isn’t anywhere close. This is, again, Shadows eating a fallen god. You have no frame of reference for that, nor my rules for what happens after the fallen god is killed. If we were sitting at the table and I did this, you wouldn’t question it for a second. I’d wordsmith the shadows viciously consuming this fallen god, ripping his soul to pieces, and the eerie smile on the god’s face as the shadows forms twist and morph into black horrific faxcimilies of the god, and turn to look at you with a deep hunger. You’d go “Oh, shit”, kill the shadows and move on with your adventure, where I could revise that (honestly SHIT ability) OOC. Which brings up, btw, that I love how none of you are bitching about enemies after this point being immune to the Strength Drain, cause THAT’s not lazy DMing or extremely convenient for the BBEGs LOL THAT kind of sudden and convenient change is definitely fair to do to you, isn’t it?

[@fmorneweck5513]

Creative kills are always the best. Especially when the monster is wayyyyyyy out of their league.

[@Canadian_Ry]

Boneclaw: "Snakes... Why'd it have to be snakes" "ooh, looks like you're in a bind now!" "Oh ho! The scales have turned" "That's a wrap!" Every gnomie's gone surfin', surfin B-O-A Just had to get that outta my system.

[@berniebroig8745]

I can respect it

[@TmaireTame]

Play smart, not hard. That's how you win D&D.

[@hossdelgado626]

Yes

[@gagne6928]

:( I'm always hard when I play dnd

[@hossdelgado626]

@@gagne6928 no

[@FordFemboy150]

I was dming once, it was one of my first times as a dm, so me and my party agreed to not take that game too seriously, only enough so It doesn't become a shit show. The party was an Ogre Barbarian, a High-Elf Sorcerer, a Wood-elf Ranger and a Thiefling Bard. Long story short, later on the campaign I made then encounter a Mind Flayer. They weren't supposed to fight it. The Ogre just said "Thing scary, me kill" and ran towards the thing. The mind flayer tried to use mind spells to control him and stuff, but, here's the thing, the Ogre was a int 1 character. Long story short, the guy who was playing as the ogre just said "I'm too dumb for his mind spells to affect me", I made him roll to see if he really would resist the spells, he got a crit resist, which not only allowed him to resist, but also made the mind flayer really confused, which left an opening for him to attack it and eventually kill him. So yeah, he single handedly killed a fucking mind flayer because he was too fucking stupid to be affected by mind spells.

[@alexrivers8163]

if you have an Int of 1 your character is brain dead. Like not being funny. His brain literally wouldn't work, and he wouldn't be able to walk let alone talk. I think the lowest you can have and still even be a sentient creature is 3.

[@Spacemongerr]

Fun story, but it doesn't make sense, unless you are using very heavily homebrewed rules ;) - Like Alex said, a creature with an intelligence of 1 would be too stupid to be able to speak or do anything that requires more intelligence than that of a moth. Ogres typically have an INT of 5, which is indeed very stupid, but leagues smarter than a moth or earthworm. - Being stupid (having a low INT) makes ones mind _easier_ to control, not harder. Be it by magic or not. Both by common sense and by the rules of the game. - There is no such thing as a "crit resist". Rolling a 20 only gives you a crit on attack rolls, _not_ on ability checks or saving throws. But hey, as long as you had fun, that's what counts :)

[@gabrialsperka422]

Lowest int required to still be sentient, not including talking, just processing what's going on and understanding it, is 3. If I recall, lowest int for speaking a language is 5 or 6. Lower int means it's easier for you to be manipulated by things like spells or mind flayers, while higher int means you'd be a higher priority for a mind flayer, as they consume the int of smart creatures.

[@Aplesedjr]

I was able to kill a instantly kill a lich by getting him to hold my staff of the magi and absorbing one his spells, which made the staff explode and cause about 800 damage to him.

[@davewantz1766]

“This story is....” Me: all about how my life got flip turned upside down

[@brandie3344]

Here before the heat death of the universe kicked in.

[@liosdrkblood]

And that boys and girls is why d&d is the greatest game on the planet

[@HunterSentinel]

I did something similar but blew up 42 goblins and orcs in an abandoned fortress that we lured them into and proceeded to beat to death the rest with themselves and oil lanterns filled with glass. I also defeated a dueregar fortress with a makeshift anarchist fire bomb made out of their own oil barrels tied together with metal fragments, rusty weapons, nails, more lanterns... many of them cooked to death screaming... I would have felt bad if it didn’t feel so good being the one coming up with the plan. I came up with both... I’m making it my characters thing to be good at total domination tactics. No chance of failure, large amounts of destruction, making a statement about my superiority with every fight. My character is the Prophecized hero of an ancient adventuring guild turned crime family. He’s supposed to be a worthy successor to the guild/families original founder. I think I’ve done good so far. I was an enforcer for the family before I was to become the Capofila.

[@barbarahelens5240]

I really want to see a movie about those two guys. They have such awesome personalities. "I'll wait" killed me

[@hearttheart6229]

This kind of reminds me of my first time playing D&D. I played with my sister, my cousin, a guy friend, and a girl friend of mine. Now it was only about his 3rd time being a DM, and the entire party had never played before. All of us were super excited and it was hilarious, we all had so much fun, people got arrested at some point, one character wore booty shorts everywhere, it was great. So along the line this unstable NPC we called shaky boi rolls a Nat 1 in some forest combat and quite literally falls off a cliff. We all knew he was important and so we were laughing but it was painful. We get to this fortress in the mountains and enter immediately, with no worry about what’s inside. We kill 2 goblins, go into a room, and there’s a literal demon. No idea what kind of demon, but he was speaking infernal and just radiated dark magic. So we all get ready to fight, except our Tiefling rogue (my cousin) gave him a long speech about being part of their kind and that we meant no harm and all that Jazz. She asked if she could roll for seduction. She rolled high. He kept rolling low. At one point I started casting spells to try to make everything better but I was making everything much worse. At the end, a last ditch attempt to win before absolute death for all, she hugged him. Natural 20. He opened a portal, stepped through, and left. And that’s how we won. Later the DM told us shaky boi was supposed to lead us away from the demon but yeah he died. Good times had by all

[@SW337x7007H]

This... Is beautiful. An attempted horror story derailed by the Lawn Gnome Druid.

[@sanddry738]

Wow. The ingenuity Of players is amazing at times. Reminds me of the hag story in the bonegrinder mill

[@trikstrogaming5828]

After this the bone claw probably felt like he was playing dark souls

[@donuttheturtle2.070]

Great vid like always I was watching Rune Smith when you uploaded this

[@gremlinwc8996]

This was the inspiration for my favorite dnd character: Nath, the tiefling draconic sorcerer drag queen. His ancestors worked with other adventurers, a local army, and a gold dragon to fight of a demon incursion. During that time, 2 things happened: the dragon pretended to be a human and had it's way with nath's ancestor, and the demon lord who ran the incursion, Graz'zt, cursed nath's ancestor. Cut forward to nath, who has magic and human parents. He grew up to become a popular drag queen with his disguise magic, and became a fan favorite. He decided to become an adventurer to bring good and himself to the people of the world. Sorry that was a rant but yeah, this is what inspired the basic idea.

[@ethanotoroculus1060]

Wow, this actually plays shockingly well off of the entire premise of sorcerers. Gotta have that high charisma stat!

[@gunrugger]

The first time the BBEG gets killed in the river actually makes the thing even more menacing. I can't imagine doing that to someone/something and then encountering them again. That would be a bone chilling experience.

[@Xeconis]

It wasn't instant, but I rolled highest on initiative, and proceeded to spend my turn to kill Tiamat in two stabs. Thanks, 18th level Rogue!

[@Xeconis]

@@GoblinUrNuts Using all the Assassin Archtype features, including Death Strike because the DM rolled a 1, the fact that is was a weakened summon because of a lack of masks, and that I had a magic dagger that dealt bonus damage to all dragons.

[@Xeconis]

Also, the second attack was because I managed to apply Surprise on Tiamat because my DM allowed that considering the context of what happened right before I attacked.

[@Xeconis]

I also just got lucky as fuck with my rolls

[@Xeconis]

And both hits were automatically crits. First because she was surprised, second because she hadn't done anything yet.

[@Xeconis]

Also this was 5e just incase you were calculating a different edition

[@jamesonsan8539]

You two are so amazing, I am so bereft that I am only discovering this now, as clearly i found your channel after this came out. Oh the backlog. I could really see this in my mind and it brought me such joy.

[@NoManLP]

This is almost as rough as when Zito spent over two hours writing his BBFG For TFS at the table. And Grant, who plays Ezra, a comical Rogue Performer. Uses 1000 metal ball bearings item to trip the boss, he rolls a nat 1 on his save for the trip, then they have severity roll, guy rolls another 1, which is 100% fatality. BBFG throws his flaming weapon into the air as he falls, weapon comes right back down on top of him, impaling him through the ground, but before that, their Bard Eloy casted Heat metal on BBFG's plate armor. So when the dude fell, his searing hot armor burnt the floorboards underneath him, they were on a wrecked ship out in the ocean. He went right through the bottom of the ship and drowned in his burning plated armor as he rolled a 2 to try and stop himself from drowning. That's how Team Four Star wrecked their DM's Boss Fight.

[@DragoLucifer260]

Jman LPGuy what about when they turned an evil Druid into a firecracker

[@THENAMEISMEGAMAN]

Ah yes. First Johnny Dark Souls, then the wendigo.

[@kuroshinigami9143]

ahh the shenanigans of Johnny Dark SOuls and the Windigo firecracker, i miss those days. or should i say, those Dagons bye

[@kana22693]

I miss Eloy. :(

[@altonblue6921]

Damn it... Booze Context, I was running a game with my father and a few friends (But we'll only focus on the main two culprits), my dad was playing a Half-Elf Sorceress named Marjorie with a smart-ass Mimic Bag of Holding and my friends was playing a Human Fighter/Rouge named Engle who was blessed with an immortal liver by a deity from a different world (The one he transferred that character from) because he drank so much booze, like a Liquor Store wouldn't be enough to satisfy this man's thirst for booze. Well they took up this quest where they had to investigate a cave that a party had disappeared in, and long story short it was infested with a Spider Hive, they eventually made it to the final cavern where 8-10 Giant Spiders were protecting their queen. Well, my dad had the bright idea to interrogate the drunken rouge and this is how it played out. *Marjorie*: "Engle, how many times have you vomited in my bag behind my back since we met" *Engle*: "10 times..." *Marjorie*: "Engle...!!!* *Engle*: A day". Now just so you know, the party had known each other for nearly a year now. So my dad proceeded to have his bag spray out the gallons of vomit that itself was alcoholic, so now these giant spiders and the queen was covered in flammable vomit... And next thing I knew there was a flaming arrow soaring through the air, setting the vomit on fire and killing all the spiders in the cavern... And to this day, that was known as "The day my party killed a Spider Hive with Vomit" Now please be aware, this was my very first time DMing, so if any of that was against the rules I didn't know

[@ohwowitsthatguy9154]

Disgusting, I love it.

[@bluefan898]

The only issue I see is Bag of Holding weight limits. But you have your fun.

[@monkeysue61]

Sounds about right to me

[@boolossus2436]

Rule of Cool my dude

[@g80gzt]

bag of holding weight limit due to how density of fluid works would make it rupture before it filled to spatial capacity, thus doing a 10ft sphere of cut from material, paste to astral.

[@Perimish]

I was checking your channel for a new video and then i got the notification you'd uploaded one. I don't care if it's 1:07 in the morning. I WANT D&D!!

[@idavisband]

Yep

[@hemuli3817]

1 AM ain't even bat it's 4 AM here haha

[@hunterkoons2008]

Hearing stories about these characters really hits differently after seeing them in action in Evenfall.

[@BoltofGreece]

10:39 look how proud this mother lover is, it's hilarious

[@pillarsofsnow7940]

This story needs to be animated and synced up to bulk and skull’s theme

[@bigmemes9604]

From these vids u decoded to start a game with my friends im a bard i like it thanks for making these vids so i could see how fun dnd is

[@BloodyBay]

I never really had a BBEG get one-shotted, but I did have a BBEG get TWO-shotted once. So it was a homebrewed "D&D 1.5 Edition" campaign that I ran from 1993 to 1996. For one of the later adventures, a la "Expedition to the Barrier Peaks," a big spaceship from the future came screeching out of a wormhole and crashed down in the mountains. My players' party went up there and had to fight a few buttloads of robots, cyborgs and futuristic shock troops just to get inside. After a long adventure with the usual epic skirmishes and a few comedic moments (like one of the fighters Grappling a vending machine to get some free snacks, then botching a Strength check to open a foil bag and failing to open it), they met the enemy commander and mastermind of the whole invasion: Captain Stane, coming out of the cargo bay in a big battle mech. And the moment I finished with all the scenery porn about Stane arming up his multishot railguns, plasma rockets and such, one of my players said, "I cast Disintegrate on the mech." Captain Stane booched the Saving Throw, his mech crumbled to a shower of rust and powdered plastic, and he popped out of the crumbling cockpit with a chaingun winding up. The same player said, "I cast Polymorph Other on Captain Stane." And Stane rolled horribly low on the Save vs Spells; I think I rolled a Natural 2. So two spells completely wiped out the BBEG whom I had spent an hour or two crunching all the stats for. Naturally, I was pretty well pissed off! :-D

[@EvilPaladin11]

I wish that I had fellow players this creative, and a DM that would allow this crazy degree of rule of funny and rule of cool.

[@jacobkeyser8628]

in my first ever campaign, my ranger buddy and I(assain rogue) accidently on purpose set a building on fire as a distraction. turns out it was a brewery, we leveled an entire city block including a libray with rare tomes. or wizard was none to happy about that.

[@Twinklebrightly]

I sympathize. I created a nice little game with an ice queen 20th level wizard, my players walk in and then the bard that has a vorpal blade crits.... At least he was bummed that he lost the chance to romance her.

[@Nukestarmaster]

"Off with her head"

[@topdogjr0068]

Dis she have legendary actions

[@rutgerkemperman2830]

I'm really enjoying these, they're comedy gold as well as an incredible source of inspiration for both player and campaign!

[@dontme6996]

My party was fighting a gigantic monstrosity yesterday and our bard polymorphed it into a badger. It fell 500 ft and the dm decided to use an app where it took 50d10. So... Needless to say, it died.

[@natekite7532]

Ow oof 20d10 is max fall damage and a polymorphed creature reverts to its original form on dropping to 0 hp or dying

[@stijndevries6175]

@@natekite7532 The extra fall damage would still carry over into its original form though, right? Also, I think a lot of people homerule the cap on fall damage

[@natekite7532]

@@stijndevries6175 no; overkill doesn't carry over. And yeah, I think most people basically just skip the did rolling step to say that if something gets dropped 500 feet, it's just dead. Which honestly makes sense bc how often are you really going to drop things off a 500 ft cliff except in a narrative moment? And in a narrative moment you just want the thing to die, no uncertainty or die rolling required.

[@Suo_kongque]

Nate Kite ahem.... you were not the dm for this game, nor were you a part of it. hence, you do not get a say.

[@dontme6996]

@@natekite7532 he actually would've dropped to a minimum of 1 HP, but we were playing with house ruled fall damage and (unfortunately) crit fails (I made an attack roll and the DM felt like having my battle hardened warrior nearly fall off this bridge as well by swinging so hard he misses and catches himself on the edge with the axe. I had to make a strength check with double Dis because of a Crit fail.)

[@LordGingivitus66]

Ah the old "Ignite the bar full of nitroglycerin to detonate the cliffside and drop the BBEG into the perilous river below" gambit. A classic tale really, one as old as time.

[@jetpizzashere1228]

Is it bad I knew BBEG meant big bad evil guy the second I looked at it

[@cloudvii166]

No its not

[@Xeconis]

most do if they do story driven rpgs

[@sanddry738]

Considering the fact BBEG is fairly common when referring to big villains I’d say no.

[@idavisband]

No

[@rodrigoa.m3566]

I'd no clue

[@Pip8448]

Bone Claw became the DnD Jessie and James. More show and annoyance then actual threat.

[@danielmasom7132]

It’s like in TFS when they insta-killed that demon guy because he rolled 3 natural 1s

[@MostLikelyMortal]

I just wanna play a Travelocity gnome campaign. Go around the world staking out vacation spots and creating a medieval travel agency.

[@Telleryn]

ah you see, the best way to kill dark and sinister is always with creative whimsy

[@xotube2206]

Basically killing the boss in character creation :D

[@adriannelson4214]

Damn, now I kinda wanna play a chill af Gnome Druid. 😂😁

[@thenintendobros9918]

This reminds me of my gnome druid Gnate Gnelson. There were hordes and hordes of undead crawling out of cracks in the ground, so knowing my dm was incredibly lenient and had no idea what he was doing, Gnate just "no u"ed them by casting create water using his highest spell slots, washed them back into their holes, and buried them under the loose soil, which was now mud, until the cracks reformed into solid ground. Good times, good times

[@thalesfreitas1361]

this video has the first foreshadowing of stibbles codex...nice

[@ThreadbareInc]

Reminds me of how my players would routinely steamroll my boss enemies back when I ran a 3.0-3.5 campaign. Partly it was the system to blame and partly I needed to bring in more enemies than just one guy with an apparently high CR, but either way I'm happy that 5th edition gives you monsters with legendary actions and mountains of hit points.

[@judepultz6033]

Ah yes, alcohol in D&D games. Basically dynamite.

[@michaelhengeli7817]

Rule #1. If you are running a boss fight.. never give your boss robes. If you describe your boss with robes, of any kind (if you mention the word robes) your players will assume it is a spell caster and they will go through hell and high water to throw every possible resource they have to defeat that boss in one round.

[@jhart6764]

So his names are logan, logan, runesmith, logan, and logan.

[@adwitatherealadwita]

J hart And Larry.

[@tuffy1992]

NPC: "Why are you doing this?" Logan: "...I just felt like walking."

[@SpawnOfJenova]

Reminds me of a CoS session where my lvl 3 party ran into 3 hags. So my halfling cleric proceeded to bring the entire building down on them causing it to fall off a cliff. Chaotic Good, baby!

[@D.Dragon]

The 3 hags near the beginning of CoS are always a sauce of tons of stupid stories.

[@htspencer9084]

Don't they have a bunch of kids tied up, upstairs?

[@jeremyvanauken5011]

Reminds me of the time I made a boss fight have a puzzle element that ended up having him be almost one-shotted in the first turn of combat. Basically it was a huge undead amalgam formed from a powerful curse the party was attempting to lift. I had the chamber lit by two massive braziers full of flaming oil. I intentionally placed these as a creative way to chunk the boss’s massive health pool in an interesting way The rogue went first and immediately cottoned on. Shot down both braziers and rolled the resulting 40d6 fire damage. Now, that’s a lot I know. But the boss had 400 hp and was supposed to be a slight puzzle. I also had taken into account that as an undead he’d be vulnerable to the damage. What I didn’t account for was the rogue rolling almost *MAX* damage on all those d6s. And that’s how a boss went from 400 hp to around 30 hp in one turn.

[@TigerKirby215]

The purest form of the players ruining the DM's plans.

[@WeaponizedGoochsweat]

I thought I would share this story of my first Champaign where we actually killed the BBEG without even starting combat, as well as every other enemy in the room: We are in a cave. Rogue rolls a nat 20 perception, and notices the baddie who I believe was some sort of necromancer (we never really found out due to the next events). I was playing my Shadow Sorcerer named Saggus Nuttus, my second character ever (rip Elisif the Cleric). Other than the BBEG we see a few bugbear (if I spelled that right), giant spiders and some other enemies I can't recall. We also see a huge dwarven statue with giant emerald eyes, which we obviously wanted. We had to come up with a plan, because some of us were hurt. We decided that the eyes were probably rigged with a trap, so we might use this for our benefit. We stayed behind as we sent our rogue with invisibility on as well as a high stealth roll to grab the eyes to see if there was a trap. He gets the eyes, and yes there was a trap. The ceiling rocks and stones fell down and crushed everyone in that part of the cave but the rogue who was protected by thr statue which fell on top with his arm not crushing them but covering them. Every single enemy including the BBEG failed their saves, and all of them died instantly. The DM didn't know how to feel because just days before he prepped a big part of the character, including their own voice and a whole dialogue before we roll initiative, which took him some time. They never even knew what hit them. Saggus took his staff, and went on in her search for the power to trample her enemies and be a total tsundere.

[@cidredwood6170]

Almost christmas.

[@kc-ip2vc]

Yeah its (xp to level) 3 more days

[@JayF2912]

@@kc-ip2vc *_B O Y_*

[@TriforceChad]

Our last campaign finished with me accidentally soloing the final boss. Compelled duel is my new favorite spell.

[@jatasang4873]

Was in a gestalt party where we beat a Terrasque in 3 rounds

[@krowodom5719]

How?

[@JayF2912]

@@krowodom5719 probably dropped it from orbit or something lol

[@Nukestarmaster]

The 5e terrasque is surprisingly doable in 5e, it has no attacks that have range more than 20 feet and a rather paltry 40 feet of movement (although it gets to move half its movement as a legendary action). An ancient white dragon would only take about 50 rounds to kill it while kiting it with it's breath weapon and never taking an attack. A white dragon is a CR 20 monster so any level 20 pc can be true polymorphed into it.

[@JayF2912]

@@Nukestarmaster white dragon breath is dc 19 and the tarrasque has a +10 to the save. It will more then likely make the save, so damage is 27 per turn. Average hp would mean it would take 26 turns to kill the tarasque as an adult white dragon - but. Dragons have to roll to recharge their breath attack. Every. Single. Time. Do you really think they will roll a 5/6 26 times in a row? And the blasts range is only 60 foot - a dash and a legendary action would put the terrasque 100 foot towards the fucker. 2 turns is all it would take to catch up to it if it attacked both turns. No, its not 'suprisingly takeable'. This is all bearing in mind you even get a level 20 wizard in the first place who has the spell and a 9th level spell slot. So many things have to go perfectly for this to work - no cover because the dragon cant get close. Nobody else attacks the dragon and breaks con, the fight has to last less then an hour, he has to recharge every round.

[@Nukestarmaster]

@@JayF2912 Maybe it will take 60 turns instead of 50, 75 if the terrasque makes every single save (27 average damage every breath weapon will kill the terrasque in about 25 shots, and the dragon shoots one shot every 3 turns on average). The ancient white dragon has a fly speed of 80 feet and can move an additional 40 as a legendary action, so that 100 feet dash of the terrasque is a complete nonissue. And this will work with any true dragon of adult or older and doesn't have a poison or fire breath weapon (so no brass, gold, red or green), in fact an adult bronze dragon is only CR 15 and has a breath weapon that averages 66 damage with a DEX 18 check (the terrasque has a 15% chance of succeeding on that check); it could probably kill the thing in less than 40 turns. The party would need a 17th level bard, warlock or wizard, but if you're fighting a terrasque your party should be a pretty high level anyways (and the one getting polymorphed would not be the one casting polymorph so no con saves).

[@ruffles4scruffles]

The beginning of this video was amazing for me because I too, am a Logan. Hearing my name so many times on a short period gave me an touch of anxiety. Lol.

[@bluefan898]

God dammit. Logan would fit in great with my players.

[@NomNom1970]

It's stories like this that got me into D&D and kept me playing for so many years.

[@Demonamic777]

So completely distracted and off-topic, Jordan's non-binary character sounds awesome as fuck.

[@dilophosaurussk4333]

Jacob: Noo you cannot just kill the creepy bbeg at level 1! Stibbles: *Hehe snek go sssssssssss*

[@olavapedersen6049]

I love how these stories are basically just him 'shaming' his players. Reminds me a bit of the pet owners posting pictures of their pets with a sign saying something bad they did Keep up the great content 👌 Stay awesome

[@ChestersonJack]

That reminds me of how we were about to fight some kobolds that had previously kidnapped the mother of one of our party members. The mother had broken free because she was a badass, but the kobolds were still encroaching on her farm territory and so the mother needed help fighting them off. Here’s the thing: our party member? A teifling. So while her elven mother ran this nice farm, her father was this fairly powerful devil who simply did not have time to deal with these assholes threatening his wife’s farm. So he gave us some gifts to help us out (I got some sweet adamantine splint armor). At this point, it’s like, these people are pretty powerful, why do they need our help with some kobolds? Well, as it just happened to turn out, there’s more than just kobolds overrunning the farm. There’s wolves and giant magical badgers and all sorts of things. So my 8 intelligence fight is sitting with his party in the farmhouse, having dinner, sipping fine elven wine, and going over our plan of attack. Anyways that’s when I get what I think is the genius idea of making essentially Molotov cocktails with this fine elven wine… When it comes to the wolves, I didn’t get a single hit in, and when we got to the badgers, our Pandarin monk became friends with them and tamed one as a pet, and the kobolds??? I thought it would be funny to have my dumb as rocks fighter try to talk to them first, because of course it would be silly to try and reason with the kobolds, but it actually worked and I got them to help work for our delivery company instead of the dragon they were serving under??? Like these three, built up fights with lots of prep and they just sorta… don’t happen.

[@beapritchard7645]

One time I accidentally killed my friends bbeg by combining lv 2 chaos bolt and hold person, it was op

[@morphadomus2385]

You see this is when you make a plot twist in that the BBEG wanted to die to become stronger than the party could possibly imagine, then begin to telepathically haunt the character that killed him.

[@zlambert23]

I wanna see a game with Kurt Savory so bad, they sound awesome!

[@snickerdoodlekid1]

I love these stories so much

[@kevinbarber2795]

Who would win? Forest Hippy or one SkeleBoi?

[@Fandomnut]

I love this channels stories so much

[@X3._.n3]

BBEG? Big Bad Evil Guy?

[@oz_jones]

Years late, but yes. The main baddie of the campaign.

[@raffaeleramieri3411]

Fake Lich: can teleport Game master: I'm gonna pretend I didn't see that

[@del5493]

Ah yes BBEG... Big Bad Evil Guy

[@kc-ip2vc]

Bsmssbecesei

[@stefanjentoft8107]

I didn’t one shot the BBEG, I just destroyed their spaceship and left them to die on a completely deserted desert planet in a Star Wars campaign.