How Kathy Jewell Tried to Find Her Abuser Whilst Hiding From Him | Handsome Devils | TCC

[@rynneviolet4291]

The wife he left her for must have heaved a deep sigh of relief…

[@CK8smallville]

Unless he killed her too?

[@carolync6446]

I was wondering why the first wife didn’t seem to try to warn her..😞

[@Rosaliarose897]

Really! So she. Played nooo part in his seduction. Please don’t play the I had No Idea ..

[@chrissyc1996]

Why would the wife he left be obligated to warn his mistress about anything? Plus, if she did try, he would've pulled the old my ex is crazy or my ex is bitter card.

[@Roy-w2o3f]

I think she should have written the EX a letter of apology for disrupting a marriage when she had the afair with John..

[@ceilconstante640]

These types of programs need to be shown in High Schools with discussions on Narscissist, Psychopaths & Sociopaths. Please, if you have young people in your life, especially sensitive empathetic types (which are the preferred Target) encourage them to watch and learn! Long before YT many of us have had hellish experiences that still give us nightmares.

[@thenewyorkcitizen]

You are exactly right

[@officerfarva3666]

Needs to be shown to judges and court employees who handle divorces even more. They don’t think this stuff happens in real life.

[@ceilconstante640]

@@officerfarva3666 unfortunately, judges ans court employees can be high functioning Narscissist, Psychopaths & Sociopaths.

[@VioletJoy]

I couldn't agree more. Personally, I think such topics of human psychology are far more important than much of what is taught in school that will never be used. I wish I had known the warning signs.

[@ceilconstante640]

@@VioletJoy I wish I would have known also. I was brought up always hearing be nice to people and they'll be nice back but it doesn't work that way. But I've since learned to pay closer attention to behavior, body language, eyes and attitudes. And to take my time getting to know anyone new and never use the internet to meet people!

[@mpschafer]

I can’t help but wonder if the wife he left felt as though she’d been given the best gift in the world? Freedom from this man.

[@lcam9241]

Yeap

[@NikkiC777]

Probably!🤷‍♀️ She was probably celebrating. 🎉🍾🍻🎁

[@donnamariedavidson5065]

Most definitely.

[@marjoriemanduli2935]

My exact sentiment

[@patricialagrier5218]

He probably killed her also, look at all the identity he had. He was a broken little drunk that took his anger out on women he met.Always move into their space. Very jealous man, he killed before I believe.

[@Sadbuttrue-ThatSwedishGirl]

The “I wouldn't have acted that way if I didn't love you so much”🤮brings back so many bad memories and it normalizes abuse mixed with love.

[@StellaFl]

“When people show you who they are, believe them the first time.”~Maya Angelou

[@SharonDavenport-v7j]

🎉 Maya❗️

[@Argeaux2]

That’s very trite. Abusers are experts at making people believe they can change.

[@StellaFl]

@@Argeaux2 ummmmmm, exactly? You basically explained why we should believe who they are the first time 😺

[@laniyoungblood4241]

You have to manipulate your way out. I had to! My abuser held me hostage for 2 days… that feeling of being free or “released” is something fierce. Never leave when they are around , never say you’re going to leave out loud. Plot in silence … make them think everything is ok… and when you’re alone … you put that plan into action and YOU GET THE F OUT AND NEVER EVER LOOK BACK! 🏃🏾‍♀️ 🏃🏾‍♀️

[@NikkiC777]

Right the most dangerous time is when your leaving.

[@helenaa2487]

I'm so glad you made it out and didn't become one of these stories we're all watching

[@EWAMILENAP]

Spot on♡

[@Cc07]

Yes sadly you have to fight fire with fire. You can try the straight path and go through the courts but it’s shown not to work many times.. you can try therapy and involving family and friends but what usually work is using the same manipulation.. you have to make them think it’s their decision not yours. I’d either feed their ego or do anything that makes me undesirable in their eyes.. usually just giving them reactions they want is all that it takes. It takes a long time to get past the fear tho And yes always be 110% positive they are far away before you pack and leave.. many have surveillance apps and devices which happened to me so you have to be careful. Take your car immediately and look for a tracker too. Prepare go bag in the car if possible too. There are also women shelters and probono counselors that maybe can help..

[@gussygatlin3093]

TRUTH!!!!

[@JosannaMonik]

The minute a man acts like he owns you, that's it; you are no longer safe.

[@scotsman6712]

Same with crazy women.its not just men .

[@xelip973]

We know that! It's just a question of how many men and how many women!

[@belindascott2747]

@@scotsman6712 BS! Women are murdered in DV every day, men are not!

[@crimedramadvdhotspot7720]

@@scotsman6712 Str8up there be some crazy women out there

[@JosannaMonik]

I agree some women are possessive as well; but to put it in context; a lot more women are murdered by male partners/ex-partners than vise-versa. @@scotsman6712

[@anja2716]

Time and time again we hear the same longing, reasoning. "I just wanted him to be the 'man' I fell in love with!" That man didn't exist, he was NEVER real. You fell for nothing more than an act. The violent, abusive, narcissistic, controlling, jealous liar was the real man. Everytime!

[@cindytrayer4279]

100% truth. And narcissists are incapable of love. They despise themselves and you. You are nothing but an object for them to get their supply. Soulless creatures.

[@dorindadouglas2847]

Exactly!!

[@adrianahalmi3337]

That’s exactly right… and the sad part is that it’s you who still stay in that abusive relationship believing that he’s going to change in that man that was at the beginning… the same still ,, monster’’ was than… now… and never ever change !!!! Psychopath!!!!!

[@heidimedel]

That just goes to show how effective love bombing and trauma bonding works on the human psyche.

[@siatlemore6130]

Time and time again we forget that no one is immune to manipulation and that childhood trauma affects our judgement as adults especially in relationships… don’t judge

[@gabbypage6929]

I grew up with this. My father and his constant put downs of my mother and me. My father was an alcoholic and threatened me with a gun when I was 17 years old. My mum wouldn’t leave as she said he would find us and kill us. My brother was obnoxious and abusive,he also threatened me with a gun. This became normal behaviour in our household. My husband also tried to kill me after a couple of years of marriage. I was divorced at 25 . I’ve spent most my life alone since. You never really get over it.

[@hodasaleman3161]

You deserve the best ,aljfe that far away from this kind of people

[@carlywright5127]

The male like this is a coward and a fool in mine eyes. If they treat their partner we'll, it is a win, win. Seriously, this bashing and put downs is not normal.

[@katarinamills8530]

❤

[@dinamireles4030]

I wish healing for you ❤

[@lambsauce1468]

❤

[@TraciDoering-hw8hu]

So glad she was able to save her cat! I love how. She said, "I took my cat, and…."

[@VelveteenRabbitinRedFern]

Yeah, I took my cat and my clothes though, when I left mine.

[@bhumphries1360]

Anyone else get the "Sleeping With the Enemy" vibe when watching him straighten up those hand towels?

[@chelsealavaya7263]

Yes!

[@joyceroy2355]

😂😂😂

[@quantumnature514]

Totally

[@darlene4152]

THAT MOVIE. I CAN'T SAY IT. AM OK NOW....those soup cans?##@%$%#$

[@LeahDyson-kq4bd]

Yes

[@AltClev37]

Never confront your abuser. Just leave them. Preferably when they’re not around. Just leave!

[@cindyreeves5048]

Yes, did it. ✔️

[@Erizou90]

Yes. He was the only one I broke up with via phone call when he was at the airport-gate going out of the country

[@missrayelyn3045]

A guy shoots through a door into a room you are hiding from him in, and you move to an isolated place with him? I can't understand that.

[@spindeltass]

If he can shoot through a door based on delusions he has, he can for sure do a lot more harm to her. She lived in fear for her life, you "can't" just get up and leave. She lived in fear for almost a decade after she left him, and he never really let her go either. Unless you've been in that situation, you don't have the audacity to think anything of her.

[@pappyreeves3336]

Just 2 observations. I also repeatedly lock and unlock my door every night. This does not mean you are a murderer. It means you have Obsessive Compulsive Disorder, as I do. Also, if anyone threatened to murder my cat, there would be no second chances. They would never ever see me again.

[@margochanning6868]

I do not have OCD but I thought the same thing about John having OCD and that was so unrelated to him being a homicidal maniac. Also, YES, I looked at my kitty and thought the same thing. That is such a common MO for these abusive and controlling monsters to kill the pets of their victims. People that put up with these threats and abuses not only put themselves in danger but also everyone around them - as we saw with Turi. I doubt the ad was Turi's first head's up red flag.

[@bm-ww8kb]

no it means you are acting compulsively. it does not mean you now have a diagnosis lol

[@surrealsteph]

AGREED! The moment anyone says something sick like harming an animal, I am done! I will not allow any innocent beings to be harmed by some evil POFS like that man is!

[@bonnylouwho76]

@@margochanning6868 As I held my kitty watching this and my doggy too.

[@Sheerkat7]

Sorry to hear the girlfriend confronted him over the newspaper article. That was a bad move. She should have hidden it. If someone seems too good to be true, they are. He did the classic narc ploys: love bombing, presents and romantic gestures, until he got them hooked. Once he moved in, the real monster came out. Of course, he said he'd change, and the cycle started over. Too many women fall for it again and again.

[@carolinemartin2254]

How right you are. I have recently had a lucky escape after 20 years of hell but I do fear for the next victim, especially as he is likely to carry the anger of myself ending our marriage. I say this because he came to me harbouring anger from previous relationships that women had ended with him!

[@Sheerkat7]

@@carolinemartin2254 I'm glad that you escaped. You have to cut off all contact. That can be hard to do.

[@billy6pack887]

Try being married to Vladinir Putin.

[@christinamenhennett]

@@carolinemartin2254 definitely cut off all contact and don't ever let him know where you are. Change your number too and make sure only trusted people have it. Glad you got out. I narrowly escaped my ex-husband but I did 20 years ago.

[@cindytrayer4279]

My first thought too, all the classic narc traits - narcissistic rage, control, everything was her fault , etc. And the terms she used to describe him- demonic, the soulless eyes, hating her. Been with a covert narc for 13 yrs and went no contact a couple months ago. There’s no fixing them.

[@Kathy-20J-73]

That's not love Kate....that's control That's not a house in the woods. That's isolation Never ignore Red Flags

[@patriciamcallister9261]

A man shot through the door twice to kill her, and she goes back to him! Wow!

[@cindytrayer4279]

And move to an isolated place.

[@star_light_kid]

@@cindytrayer4279boggles my mind!

[@janjohansson4292]

sick she have the chance to leave

[@ellafacebooktruecrimecases3644]

Right dumazz

[@JayFal68]

If he's a narcissist they can charm the birds out of the trees. She loved him too and believed he would change

[@jacquelinecroasdale7115]

As an abused person myself in the past this set off so many old memories. I couldn't believe she went back to him after he threatened her with a gun the first time.

[@fauna3989]

I can. It's a trauma bond.

[@tonyapena9928]

Wow!? So sad 😢!! Thank God shes alive

[@pattih7]

Yes, I’ve been there, and felt every pain these ladies had inflicted upon them; as if it was me and my former husband. I’m healed to an extent, owing this to God and His Grace. You always have a remnant inside that responds, when you see or hear that haunting voice, though. Mine has passed on, and I recurved a boost of healing Grace after he was gone. It’s sad that a person can be so full of evil, as to effect someone this way. I am alone, and will remain so. I’m not bitter nor having problems socially. Just have no desire for a coupling with another . I’m aging and have health issues, and really haven’t the energy for much but my own needs. It would be unfair for the other person. I give my love to others through praying for them and trusting in our wonderful Lord God. He is our Savior; not another person or place or thing! 🙏🧡🙏🧡🙏🧡🙏🧡

[@anandjoshi8554]

another fool lady/American !!!!..Terri...if that person photo was in paper...why she argued with him instead of going to police???

[@fauna3989]

@dennismcconnell4222 she was in love with what he pretended to be. Don't blame her. He lied about who he was.

[@giantcheeseater3650]

Being 'in love' is no excuse for going back to a pysco. she had no kids, was financially independant and yet went back!?! smh!!! She's very lucky he didn't kill her the second time around! People - when a person shows you who they are - believe them - you cannot change them!!!

[@acanadianfarmgirl2667]

Believe who they are the first time they show you who they really are.

[@CK8smallville]

She called him a monster etc. She needs to take a good look at her intelligence since she finds monsters lovable.

[@istudios225]

@@CK8smallville Brilliant!

[@Amarillobymorning777]

U don’t understand The vicious circle they created it . They are very very good in manipulated they victims. It’s like u r a rabbit and don’t understand the power of a leopard or a jaguar can do .. blessing 🙏

[@persephoneszeliga]

That’s what I was thinking. Not married, no children and has her own money. Why stay?

[@star_light_kid]

Kathy moved to a remote area with a man who tried to kill her once. I will never understand this.

[@JayFal68]

If you love someone you believe them

[@officerfarva3666]

These personality types get you to believe it’s your fault, that if you just try and change for them they’ll be better. It’s weird, but yeah, you can’t see it happening in the present tense, only past tense.

[@VioletJoy]

@@JayFal68 That's not love; that's fantasy.

[@VioletJoy]

@@officerfarva3666 While that's understandable, as I can attest, once he literally tried to kill her, it's a head scratcher as to why she'd go back.

[@alisonj9533]

It's called " babe, we just need a fresh start, new surroundings, leave everything behind and all those memories and start again!" Translation: I'm taking you to isolation, you'll only have me to listen to and rely on, you'll have no friends and no career, no contact unless it's through me, you'll rely on me for money and permission to do mundane things!

[@johannawatson4167]

I am sure his previous wife was thanking Kate for taking John out of her life. This story is crazy and tragic

[@marjoriemanduli2935]

And unfortunately even if the first wife had warned her, she wouldn't have believed her

[@bridget22868]

Thats assuming the first wife was alive when he walked out for the last time.

[@VioletJoy]

We never heard about her. I'm curious what happened there.

[@kirstyhesketh1416]

❤

[@TheAuthenticIsOutThere]

There is a need for a narcissistic awareness program and informative classes related to this topic in high schools! There is also a need for the law to provide financial and mental aid to those targeted by narcissists! This is a must!

[@binathere2574]

I've said this and people just laugh at me saying, impossible narcs are everywhere therefore it would never happen.

[@carolfrazer8067]

Years ago I was married to someone very similar to this man. Praise God I and my child are alive and well. Both of us are safe.

[@trj1442]

Why would she buy an isolated cabin with clearly a psychopath 🤔.

[@nicolebrown1927]

Right! So frustrating!🤬

[@monak2752]

It was like watching a movie and saying, Noooo...don't do that!! 🤦‍♀️

[@tyc1Z.Z1]

A guy shoots at her & then she buys an isolated house to set up a dream relationship with him . That's like signing up for her own death sentence knowingly & willingly. Empty headed to the extreme

[@MegaTrivial]

Fear. He has threatened her to kill her family and friends

[@istudios225]

Delusional stupidity. I hate to say it but that's my opinion.

[@moonstar7775]

Many women have had near-death experiences with controlling and abusive men and those who live through it suffer one way or another for the rest of their lives. I suffer from PTSD from almost being murdered by someone whom I trusted. Women, please beware of wolves in sheep's clothing.

[@debbiethompson14]

Marriage is way way way way overrated!!!!! I was married for 26 years to a narcissist and now I've been divorced for 20 and I've never been happier. I'm 66 now and I look and feel great

[@sunnyadams5842]

58 and finally free and feeling human for the first time, too. Narc Daddy and alchy Enabler Mum. Me? Came out High Functioning CoDep Big Time!! Hooked up with narc Lover after Narcissist after Narcissist...till I was just about dead 3 years ago. CPTSD is REAL, guys. And CURABLE!!

[@MusaA]

Loneliness will kick in at some point and you will be full of regrets!

[@Madronaxyz]

​@@MusaA BS.

[@lisamh9037]

​@@MusaAshe's already got enough regrets. Now she's free. Nothing is better than freedom. Nothing is worse than feeling alone when you're in a relationship.

[@sweetiepie7396]

So happy for you ❤️

[@lcam9241]

We have to stop participating in our own harm ladies. ❤️

[@bm-ww8kb]

and stop acting like we are to blame for it :)

[@MegaTrivial]

Stop fear somebody who threatens you. Report that cowerd to the police

[@Sisflowflow]

Yes we certainly can AND should take precautionary measures

[@aprillove570]

People really never know a person, and if someone actually loves you they never try to kill you. Once they point a gun at you, you don't ever trust them and you damn sure don't stay or go back to them. Your life is way more important than finding love

[@YuYuBee2017-cn3xh]

I can relate to this Ms. Jewell wholeheartedly. Our stories are very similar. The anniversary of my near-death experience at the hands of a psychopath happened 35 years ago on the night of March 9, 1989. He uttered the same words to me "You are going to die." Since that day I have always considered California as a God-forsaken state, especially northern California. I would be dead today had I not escaped. I fell down a steep cliff near the ocean and hid until the next morning when I managed to find help and ended up in the hospital from injuries I received from escaping from him. The stories vary but those of us who live through such horrific experiences can only warn other women to be careful who they trust since predators can look and act so normal and charming. One never knows what is hidden inside them.

[@joyful_tanya]

100% agree.

[@erikaweger2829]

I'm so sorry you had to go through that! My most scary abusive relationship was also in northern California but i am still here, trinity County. I wouldn't call mine a near death experience though, And I don't blame you one bit for leaving! Up here where it's rural it's so much more dangerous to be still near them.

[@joyful_tanya]

@@erikaweger2829 FACTS. You cannot heal if you are still in relationship with abusers. This is where "no contact" can save your life. If someone has children and needs to co-parent with them, techniques such as "grey rock" and low contact are a good choice. 💜

[@sw6118]

Message: NEVER GO BACK. A partner acts badly towards you, walk away for good in the first instance. In this case the obsessive phone calls, well before the gun incident or he had isolated her up at Gold’s Beach.

[@repentjesusiscomingsoon1529]

Even just those obsessive, crazy phone calls, waaaay too controlling, she shoulda DUMPED HIM IMMEDIATELY! Very, VERY bad sign!

[@delwynhallett565]

A married man is always OFF limits

[@dolladollabillsyo7698]

The line they use is, they are separated or soon going to be divorced... but they are still married.

[@jackieann5494]

Delwyn ... I AGREE ! separated , rotten wife , misunderstood does not matter at all . Married=off limits

[@MusaA]

Steal somebody else's spouse means you also stole somebody else's problems too.

[@GenderLoin]

That’s the least of the problems here 🤡

[@stephaniewilliams4273]

Kinda married? Is that like being kinda pregnant?

[@jackieedmondson8422]

If someone is accusing you of cheating then they are projecting and insecure.

[@vanessakelly5993]

So many red flags - just like my ex who was insanely jealous & would not listen to reason. I thought loving him would show my devotion but after a couple of drinks , he would start again. He also threatened to kill my cat. Finally he physically assaulted me & was arrested. He called me 6 months later when he was in new relationship saying we could start again - even though my house was being repossessed due to him being bankrupt. Now so many years later I am living my best life by myself ❤️

[@bluesunquake]

Exactly

[@ginnysnyder]

WOW !! I dated a fella Yrs Ago that called me all Day long from his job. At first it was sooo sweet but I started to realize it was a bit too much !! SO, One day, after shopping, as I walked up to unlock my door...the phone was ringing & I had NO Doubt it was him !! I sat on the steps & listened as it rang & rang & rang !! Then Silence, just to start again in a few minutes !!! This went on for an hour + till I answered it ! " Where were you ???" was what I heard..RED FLAG 1 !! Then one day he let it SLIP that he was waiting for me to get off work at 12am to secretly following me home...Every Nite !! RED FLAG 2!! THAT WAS THE END OF PATRICK !!!! PAY ATTENTION TO THE RED FLAGS !!!!!

[@repentjesusiscomingsoon1529]

Oh, I sure do hope you RAN RAN RAN from this controlling sicko!!!

[@humbleopinion1499]

The warning signs were there. It's a shame when someone is longing for a relationship so badly that they fail to see the warning signs - the first sign of trouble - GET OUT and don't go back - EVER.

[@dee7353]

It was not a failure to see the warning signs. It was a deliberate act of choosing to ignore them.

[@humbleopinion1499]

@@dee7353 on reflection- you are correct.

[@queenashantee1957]

THEY DID NOT FAIL TO SEE THE WARNING SIGNS. THEY FAILED TO ACT ON IT.

[@queenashantee1957]

@@dee7353 I JUST SAID THAT. TOUCH....

[@humbleopinion1499]

@@queenashantee1957 Fair enough - but do you have to shout?

[@clintshaw3786]

Wow , great story , ending was so surprisingly tragic , true narcissist to the extreme !! I feel bad for the guy who was blinded:( and RIP Turi.

[@cindytrayer4279]

Truly a psychopathic narcissist.

[@katrinahetherington3425]

So he tells her "I'm almost divorced"? Is that like being a little pregnant? You're either divorced or you're not.

[@CAL-zq3dk]

Ha ha , good one .

[@oliviaedralin1436]

These women really get themse😮in trouble when they choose their emotions against better judgement,,, they give them excuses to behave grossly inexcusable!

[@ponygirlusa]

Exactly.

[@denisebenedict6102]

She even said there were red flags at the very beginning.

[@bm-ww8kb]

@@oliviaedralin1436 well i must say this comment does prove your point..

[@lady3219]

I feel terribly sorry for the guy friend that went blind 😢

[@tyc1Z.Z1]

The only one who really deserves any sympathy in all this. His goodwill altered his life forever.

[@tyc1Z.Z1]

Dr. Randall George Nozawa, the friend who was shot died a year back coz of Covid. His KZbin channel was active till 4 months back..

[@naomiledger1374]

@@tyc1Z.Z1 Yes, Randall's a hero in my mind and with his sense of humour in tact, too. An astounding human being.

[@user-st8vt5de6p]

She brought him into a dangerous situation instead of getting out of the house or calling 911

[@laurab7302]

She should have explained to Randall that he was about to walk into a potentially dangerous situation.

[@deborahstrickland9845]

She should have called 911 instead! She knew the police were looking for the guy and she had a phone and chose to call her poor friend instead.😥

[@nimue4325]

And why did it take so long to put that ad in the papers? Why was he not on America's most wanted list? Why did the second victim confront him instead of going to the local police to get their side of the story? And if someone points a gun and orders you to kneel, you know what's coming so why comply? John obviously fed off the fear of others.

[@laurab7302]

@@deborahstrickland9845 exactly!

[@marksmith7054]

when someone is scared to death they just want help they can't think clearly

[@gaiagreen2690]

I don't think she knew he had a gun or realized the real depth of the danger they were in.

[@desireekagan1885]

I had a relationship like this....sucked the fight out of me for 5 years. I was legitimately not myself at all...all of my friends and family were quite literally mourning me....he Finally almost killed me, and having been taking to a woman's shelter....Finally safe. I snapped out of it. There are too many things to be said about why you don't leave....

[@katarinamills8530]

😢same here.

[@HAI.1]

The moment John said to his first wife I'm leaving you I want a divorce...the wife would of thought...thank God finally my prayers are answered.

[@marjorjorietillman856]

Wow, that was pretty deep when Kathy said, before the Cop told her John was dead, she already knew it. She said, it was as though the fear he had instilled in her, passed out of her, as his soul went to hell. That’s the 1st time I heard something like that, and I believe it, because he was evil! 😳

[@binathere2574]

That's how deeply they entangle you. To the people who have not experienced one, they will never understand.

[@nickybrooks6942]

If anyone threatened my pets they would be out the door so fast they probably wouldn't have time to open it , ! I paid for my daughters locks to be changed as soon as i found out her boyfriend had threatened her dog , it was only later she told me about the abuse she had suffered from him . As an abuse survivor myself I hate the fact that she felt she couldn't tell me what was happening because she didn't want to bring back that trauma . What we have to remember is that 1 in 4 women here in the UK have suffer domestic abuse , 96% off murders off woman are carried out by partners or ex partners !

[@fionamckinnon1167]

Omg he shot at her and she went back unbelievable.

[@relocatetoEUROPE]

Any doctor who comes onto a patient is a POS ( the fact he was married and she knew it gave him permission to manipulate her because they both agreed to move into a life devoid of morals) the amount of doctors who are psychopaths who go on to murder their wives/partners when they can't control them is astounding

[@lcam9241]

Some good points made

[@burntblonde2925]

Narcissists are attracted to positions of power

[@stevetrivago]

@@burntblonde2925 yup

[@stevetrivago]

I don’t think she was devoid of morals. It’s called being human. After all, he said he was almost divorced. I guess you’re perfect and have never done anything even remotely immoral.. good God 🤦🏻‍♂️

[@kathyjones5085]

@@burntblonde2925 You think she is a narcissist?

[@carolinemartin2254]

It is true how the love bombing is apparent with flowers and presents, sunsets and sunshine... then the uncontrollable anger and threats, and worse!

[@cq9882]

Why do so many Women still ignore the 🚩 Red Flags. One must retain their independence and themselves as individuals, with friends, family and other interests. These Men do not want them to have this.

[@cindytrayer4279]

@@cq9882cognitive dissonance- it’s a real thing. Been there myself.

[@fabiwilliams4644]

Once a person proves themselves to be this kind of person you can never go back, especially someone so unwilling or incapable of change

[@PlatinumIrishrose]

My dad did the locking and unlocking of the door. He was ocd . . . Very controlling too. He almost beat me to death. The neighbor saved me by saying he was calling the cops if he kept hearing me screaming. I didn't know this at the time, not until much later. Just making that one comment saved my life. IF YOU SEE SOMETHING, SAY SOMETHING!!

[@susanharting4545]

When his current girlfriend saw the picture of him in the newspaper, she should’ve secretly called the cops and told them he was there. They would’ve come and arrested him instead of her getting killed and her friend getting shot in the face. Why did she call her friend over instead of the cops?

[@NikkiC777]

Right! WTF was she even thinking?🤷‍♀️🤦‍♀️

[@fritula6200]

This was a dumb decision.

[@NudePostingConspiracyTheories]

Hallelujah. Someone said it. !! Selfish off the charts. “Oh- a man is violent and its really dangerous. Come over”. Who needs enemies.

[@NegleLir]

Oh how easy it is to be smart in hindsight huh! You can victim blame all you want (only says a lot about your character) but at least be appreciative that you have never and most likely never will be in her shoes!! Oh, and try to grow a little empathy and forethought ❤️

[@darladawn1111]

@@NegleLir Can't tell if you're unhinged or just triggered. ❤️

[@renee1961]

My heart hurts for Randall.💔💔💔💔 His Suffering, and Losing so much ,is Devastating!!

[@tyc1Z.Z1]

Dr. Randall George Nozawa, the friend died a year back coz of Covid. You can still see his vids on his KZbin channel

[@istudios225]

May he rest in eternal peace!

[@supernova4995]

Never make excuses for people's behavior.. Warning signs are there to warn you, these actions are tell tale signs

[@jessestewart169]

Someone shot at me twice I would never go back. I'm not that desperate for love.

[@michellenolan8626]

That's the biggest mistake I ever made with friends ..

[@c.h.r.i.s.t.i.n]

The problem with Kate not finding "the John she knew" anymore was because he was never the John she thought he was. I know this from being defrauded myself. Someone waltzed into my life, swept me off my feet, and threw me against the furniture, picked the locks when I was taking a bath so he could traumatized me worse than anything else to that point, after which he put a hole in the wall of MY house (he sure didn't pay for it) and body slammed me repeatedly over and over and over again to punish me for not falling when he shoved me. Because I braced myself when he came charging my resistance to his force, broke 3 bones in my foot. The problem is with people like Kate and me and other ladies who get stuck is we believe in the 1st person we met. We fell in love with the mask they wore, not with who they actually were. If I had known my husband would put me in a wheelchair, I wouldn't have even gone on that first date. He was nothing more than a monster in a man-suit, and we often don't realize it until way too late. My marriage actually caused me to die as well, and but for Jesus showing me my work needs working, I wouldn't be here now. But I knew something of God when I committed suicide in 2001 because nobody should have found me. And I knew of death because I died before so it was easily recognizable physiologically. I just didn't know that I didn't know Jesus so while it's true I've wanted to die since I was probably 10, it was 5 years after painful disabilities robbed me of living so I figured I'd just stop even trying. But I know now with zero doubt and zero hesitation that Jesus is Jesus and once you've seen Jesus and he changes you, nobody will ever get away with being able to treat you how they want. When you know who you are in Jesus, there's nothing man can do to you to make you ever feel worthless or hopeless, even while helpless and hurting because all thus is temporary but the stakes are really high in this game we call "Life", and we will either be punished for our sins or rewarded for our faithfulness. I do pray every viewer comes to know these things, even if it isn't through me because chances are you're watching this because you relate. I can't imagine any narcissistic monster setling in for a night of "Lifetime" shows and movies with their honey and a bowl of popcorn.

[@margochanning6868]

EXACTLY!!

[@joandellapaolera6486]

​@@margochanning6868Jesus is The Way,The Truth, and The Life 💯

[@randibass7558]

Amen, sister!

[@RaeBattleRapsMood]

This is crazy. I think Turi shouldn’t have not confronted him about it. Just somehow got away from him, but that’s tough when they have your address. That’s why I’m super slow to reveal my home address. That guy blinded for being a friend, totally screwed up. Wasn’t even his mess.

[@tasmaniandevil7610]

People who are alcoholics are so cruel . At one time I was to and I decided to record a party .I was so astounded at the hatefulness I portrait it left a timeless scar on my heart . To this day I don't drink It's truly the devil in a bottle

[@Mr.Sp0cK]

I think the Demon(s) are in the People before and the Alcohol just opens the Door.

[@julieoluna8887]

​@@Mr.Sp0cKExactly!

[@indiabilly]

My mother was a narcissist and an alcoholic, I spent my childhood wondering if she was the nice mother or the screaming bitter child beating one, took years to accept that she was always the vile one, nice was for other people’s comfort

[@repentjesusiscomingsoon1529]

Not for nothing is alcohol called "SPIRITS"!!!!!!!! Personally, after she said he had, "Black, black, BLACK EYES!" I truly think the man was possessed. He need a deliverance EXORCIST and I do not say that lightly! Possession is REAL!

[@ashleydunstan5393]

I just simply cannot believe that she went back and stayed in that house in the Woods by herself after he got away …. Until eventually, the police told her she shouldn’t stay there. … Uh derr … And she is very lucky to be alive and that he didn’t come back and finish the job before she eventually left ….

[@naomiledger1374]

Right? I wouldn't have the nerve to go back there alone. NO WAY!

[@melindaturner3311]

How can a grown woman see an article like that and confront him?? Nuts!

[@ElizabethDebeer-kd3fe]

It is mind boggling..

[@mojosuzo9617]

And call a friend to come over too.

[@r-l1214]

Apparently grown women can be judgey and self-righteous, too. Also nuts…

[@kathyjones5085]

This man was pure evil. He must have been possessed.

[@repentjesusiscomingsoon1529]

I really believe he WAS!!!

[@phumzamakhamba9325]

She was the best thing that happened to the Wife .

[@Stella-bl7te]

Kate, you have to Thank God every single day for keeping you alive and safe from John. It is so sad that through ignorance Turie's life was lost and her friend's sight was gone!

[@bernadettekeane3479]

That's why they call it spirits! It opens you up to demons!

[@repentjesusiscomingsoon1529]

ABSOLUTELY!!!! Personally, after her making that remark about "his eyes were BLACK, BLACK, BLACK" when he became enraged, I believe he was actually possessed! He needed an EXORCIST and I am not kidding!

[@anja2716]

Omg. Shot in the face. Still calm enough to count 11 breaths and smiles whilst recounting. Be a rich man if you could bottle that strength.

[@jodiefreeman3914]

I literally could believe it

[@tracey5601]

My heart goes out to all the victims involved. He was a disturbed man, it's not your fault Kate. May one day you find peace. Hugs♥️

[@dawna4185]

she does shoulder some blame...he showed his true colors but she dismissed them and went back to a very dangerous situation BY CHOICE...she is in part complicit...

[@binathere2574]

He was a narcissist.

[@binathere2574]

​@dawna4185 you will never understand

[@christinefuller3743]

This is one of the reasons I am single… by choice… blessed be you!! Stay strong!!

[@binathere2574]

Me too.

[@A-Grammie-On-the-ROCK]

Abusers love to take their "possession" away from famil'y and friends Ive learned from other stories so that little "cabin in the woods" was perfect for him to continue his nasty ways under alcohol consumsion

[@victorialockheart5213]

Sometimes family can be the abuser. I married an intelligent man raised to respect elders especially his parents. I thought it was admirable and noble until I realized how controlling his mother was. She visited us 3 times in one year for a total of 8 months where she dictated under the guise of help how to dress/feed/etc our first born. My husband was too polite to step in. I felt like it was not my place to spoil this special time in our life. In 5 years I lost hope and asked my husband for divorce. I wasn't married to his mom but it sure felt like it. He immediately confronted her and explained that she is stepping out of line. I was surprised because by that time I lost quite a bit of respect for my husband and believed him to be a spineless mama's boy. So, I stayed. Now, we have 20 years of marriage and 4 beautiful children, grandkids talk to their grandma on the phone and we make sure to call her at least once a week to see how things are going. But, if she ever tries to give unsolicited advice, we stop her immediately. Private life is private for a reason. Although she probably feels a little cut off.

[@randomlady6899]

I wonder what happened to him as a child to create such monstrous anger

[@brotheramartey777]

What's the matter with some women? Don't they have any discernment at all? The moment a man hits or threatens you, that should be it!

[@sandrahatherley2184]

I think sometimes they just can't let go of the "fantasy" of their fairy tale....they will ignore reality for a long time.

[@cynthiapressley8455]

What a good video. It was almost like watching a horror movie. Thank you for the upload. It's so tragic though. RIP Turie😪

[@JayFal68]

It's a book by Anne Rule too

[@christinahagar4816]

Why would anyone go back to a man that tried to shoot her? Baffling. She needs as much mental health counseling as he does. Just nuts.

[@kathykay6602]

You can forgive someone but that does not mean reconciliation.

[@norriskp]

Wow, lots of victim-blaming in the comments. Not everyone knows, people; how about a little compassion? Kathy, I'm so sorry you experienced this person's abuse, gaslighting and manipulation and wish you healing. Thank you for sharing your story to help others who may be in a similar situation.

[@margochanning6868]

Yeah, maybe enough people will read these comments and get an education. Both Turi and Kathy are cautionary tales of women who can have red flags flashing in their faces and still ignore the warning signs. I feel sorry for Randall.

[@LittleNinja2013]

Sorry but it’s like jumping infront of a car and being hit. He shot at her through a door and she went back. I don’t think it’s wrong for ppl to question her bad decisions. Also she could have saved a life if she reported him the first time he shot at her. It’s all just very irresponsible.

[@spiritfox507]

This was really good. Thank you!

[@linda9115]

When you name someone's nasty side with a name Dirk you got to know there is a problem.

[@ileanamuntean7338]

Randall is so brave! A stand up guy.

[@susanleslie4809]

Plain weird from the get go that a “dr” would draw his patient’s blood himself...

[@jennifermaddy2442]

Exactly that's what I thought was weird

[@margochanning6868]

John was probably not an MD. Most likely a chiropractor and quack.

[@ponygirlusa]

Probably just a M.A.

[@naomiledger1374]

with all those fake IDs I immediately wondered was he even a real doctor?

[@jenmrodrigues]

I've been there. It took me eight years to realize what my ex was doing to me. I've let him destroy friendships, career opportunities, the little amount of self esteem I had. All because "he cares so much for me" and "nobody will treat me like he does". I'm glad I've passed through the workshop though. I said thank you and left. I can still hear him saying "You will regret this decision, I won't be here when you change your mind". Ha. Will never ever put myself in a situation like this again.

[@masakivlogs]

The problem started with Turi, after she saw John's news in the newspaper, she was supposed to report to the police instead of telling John, RIP Turi.

[@renee1961]

My heart goes out to Randall.🙏🙏🙏🙏

[@jonathanpickering1457]

If someone turns violent in the first place just leave them straight away because they will never change I know that through the relationship I had with my girlfriend I just waked out because she was very violent person you can't help people like that I fee so sorry for both ladies and also the man who was blinded if anyone who is in a violent relationship they should leave straight away

[@tammysavoie9771]

Truly horrific. I'm sure his first wife knew how fortunate she was after seeing his face in the paper.

[@gabrielle916]

I feel REALLY bad for thinking to myself, why does this man have sunglasses on? The things he went through that day to make it alive and tell the story with such humor is nothing but God.

[@AS-rk5zz]

Omg how did she go back to the house . I’m surprised she didn’t go insane , she’s so lucky she survived him

[@misstbull]

She didn't sense he was lying bout being almost divorced? She could sense he was dead but couldn't sense he was DEADLY!!! I would NEVER give another chance to any person who points a gun at me.

[@margochanning6868]

Kathy weaves her own stories. Not sure what is truth or fiction with Kathy. But John was certainly a malignant narcissist psychopath. Some of the things Kathy said in her storytelling were dubious. Not what John did to her but what she was saying trying to paint herself in the best light instead of an incredibly dense woman in denial.

[@tyc1Z.Z1]

Exactly

[@sheilaboston7051]

... and then "move north" and not involve the police!

[@katielight9544]

I have a hard time feeling empathy for Kathy, when she knew he was married. Bummer, she thought she would have him.

[@zariballard]

Well he obviously left his wife because he moved in with Kathy.

[@tyc1Z.Z1]

Kathy doesnt mention what happened to his wife /divorce. Did she even try to find out the facts abt this before or when they were together ? Doesn't seem like it . She was happy living a fairy tale life with her prince charming -- no purpose in getting into the depths of finding about his family or first wife

[@bm-ww8kb]

@@tyc1Z.Z1 we could ask you the same question. did you even try to find out the facts before publicly posting your sins?

[@jennifermaddy2442]

Why on earth didnt Turi call the police after reading the newspaper

[@themysteriousdomainmoviepalace]

"Look into my eyes." While he's drawing her blood....And she's hooked! Hmmm....

[@juanitarichards1074]

Hypnotism....

[@bkm2797]

So many things wrong with this picture, so much left unexplained. What was shared showed how we can choose to make excuses for the most obvious red flags, or we can actually love ourselves enough to get the F away. Wonder if she really learned anything from this. I can tell you for sure he never did.

[@juanitarichards1074]

@@bkm2797 We don't need to make excuses for a traumatized victim who obviously learned from this dreadful ordeal. She has never remarried, she has great remorse over the woman who was killed......not everybody knows what the red flags are, especially if you grew up in an abusive home where abuse and cruelty is the norm......and her abuser for sure knew he was wrong......he had done this many times before even if he hadn't killed them....I bet he had a few escapees who were living in fear. He never attempted to get help for himself and I know that experienced therapists refuse to take on narcissists and psychopaths because they are so manipulative and convincing that they end up taking the therapist down with them. You need to research Trauma bonding and Stockholm Syndrome.....some victims feel its safer to keep the enemy where you can see them......rather than living the rest of their lives in dread of being found...

[@bkm2797]

Juanita, while she may have learned enough to completely isolate herself, would she not repeat the situation with a somewhat less traumatizing scenario had she remained a part of society? Like I said, there are a lot of gaps in this story that would make it more clear if we had them. Remembering how in the very beginning when he was drawing her blood, what she was detailing about him, which was all superficial, which may say a lot about her as well. How many really bad signs repeatedly over and over she made excuses for, but never thought to seek therapy. Yet she chose to leave everything and move to the middle of nowhere with someone who showed not only serious verbal abusivness, but physical too, makes this story like a movie instead of reality. What happened to the wife he was supposingly married to while she saw nothing wrong with flirting with this married man, no details about that, just selfish behavior on both their parts. Let's face it, in her fantasy she saw a doctor and her being the future wife of said doctor, it was all about looks from the get go, no love. Love doesn't hurt, but lust can and does, why so many women mix up the two has more to do with selfish behavior than anything close to love. Most of us did come from some kind of fk'ed up background of some sort of abuse, some of us recognize this and listen way sooner to the alarm going off, while others are a bit more selfish thinking we can change what's literally smacking us in the face. It's frustrating because I'm sure her friends tried so hard to warn her, but as usual she ignored them thinking she had what they wish they had. It's sad!

[@sofyabet66]

Right??? Vampire vibes...

[@renee1961]

Kate is a Lovely Woman, and I wish her all the Best!! I'm sorry for her, and the other Innocent Victims. 🙏🙏🙏🙏💐💐💐💐🥀🥀🥀🥀💔💔💔💔

[@AdamLockwood2209]

I love how the actors are so reflective..

[@molliemae6855]

She wasn’t “forced” to do anything!! 🙄 she didn’t have to put up with it!!! The narrator saying she was pisses me off! She had a choice!

[@sandraspengler4740]

Wshe was manipulated, it is called coercive control

[@terrybain828]

It doesn't help victims to give it a name so they feel like they are free of all responsibility and can just throw themselves a "pity party." If you really care about victims, empower them by showing them what they could do differently so that they can take responsibility for their part in enabling their abuser, learn from it and move on with their lives.@@sandraspengler4740

[@lesley_lezley]

Omg the poor man shot in the face and now blind 😭💔

[@lovearttherapyalways]

So scary that these creeps charm women so well in the beginning. I am so sorry for what they went through and the last victim and her friend.

[@germyw]

Yep but I need us, as women, to have more discernment. It could literally be life or death.

[@naomiledger1374]

And the crazy thing is if they can be so loving and sweet then why not just be that? That's what I can never understand. They have what they want already - why sabotage it? Bizarre.

[@christinas2035]

"I think I'm falling in love with you".. classic NARC 101 tactic

[@JBrodo]

Aw, when I saw the one gentleman with sunglasses I thought oh no, he was hurt by John...

[@barbwall3678]

She was a big tease & a player. Knew he was married. “But we’re almost divorced…& we started seeing each other”. She liked the attention and being catered to. The dude was seriously OCD, controlling, an alcoholic, & a sicko. She ignored massive red flags instead of getting out. Stupidity abounds.

[@seventieslove8783]

He wasn't "almost" demonic. He WAS demonic. That was the crux of the sickness. Demons. Inside that dude.

[@s_vincent6942]

This is a prime example of a person who is damaged. All of the red flags and she still stayed. When people show you who they are, why give them second, third and fourth chances?

[@leahstenbro4593]

I had a relationship almost the same. 3 years. I still love him which is crazy I know. He died 2 years ago. I had mixed feet about it. Sadness, Relief, empty, angry, hurt...on and on and on.😢

[@irenegray3974]

Why would you stay with a man like that for 8 years?? Really. So many red flags from the start. Don't understand this.

[@dorothyhendrix1610]

Party hats and doing the dishes, that’s why. 😂

[@orangewarm1]

You get sucked in gradually. You fall in love. You become dependant. They eat away your self esteem and confidence. The abuse isn't constant.

[@juanitarichards1074]

Trauma bonding, like Stockholm Syndrome....look it up.

[@helenejarry4878]

Supposed to be a smart woman...After the accusations and especially the punch in the wall, she should have kicked him out and ended it. After he threatened her and her cat with a gun she finally leaves, but then still takes his calls and listened to him? Come on, you're a grown independent woman!

[@SnarkyStuff1]

The 2nd woman should have called the police and asked questions later. Its best to take extreme caution and not confront someone like this. I married a narcissistic sociopath that had a white collar criminal past. This guy seemed OCD, and Pschycotic and Kate seemed like an empath. This is a prime target for narcs. There are always signs and I learned the hard way NOT TO IGNORE THEM.

[@jkshanahan007]

Dude sounded like a creep from the very beginning.

[@LenaL146]

Randall is amazing the way he describes things. What happens to people to have this inside of them?