Destiny Talks About (Hoe_math, The Ick, Comparing Partners)

[@ivansmirnoff6987]

"I'm breaking up with you, I just don't have feelings anymore." "Appeal to emotion fallacy." "I just feel like you don't care about me." "Strawman fallacy." "Please just leave, don't make me call the cops." "Appeal to authority fallacy."

[@The00man]

Underrated comment

[@cjpack]

@@The00man appeal to credibility fallacy

[@picardcook7569]

​@cjpack appeal to fallacy fallacy

[@cjpack]

@@picardcook7569 no u fallacy

[@picardcook7569]

@@cjpack non-sequitur fallacy

[@kullenberg]

This is just every Reddit relationship advice thread ever. Woman makes her boyfriend feel insecure: "You mean ex-boyfriend? It's not your job to placate his pathetic, fragile little ego. Dump him, you deserve so much better! NTA" Man makes his girlfriend feel insecure: "Buddy, you fucked up big time. Your girlfriend deserves someone who is considerate of her feelings and isn't a self-absorbed piece of shit. YTA"

[@channelname5938]

Considering these messages tend to come from progressive audiences, it’s pretty sad how they reveal themselves to still expect men to be emotionally self-sufficient and supportive all at the same time.

[@emperortgp2424]

There were two posts posted some time apart on AITA which were the same, except in one OP was a woman and in the other a man. The results were as expected

[@thomasalbrecht35]

Relationship advice on Reddit is the perfect example of globalist, "progressive", judaised America. Keep people single, more individualism, less community. More degenerate, low-brow, destructive hookup culture, less marriage. "My boyfriend and I argue over household chores and it's taking a toll on our relationship. What should I do?" "Break up with him, queen. You deserve better."

[@isaiahvaldez3330]

Aw shit, no comments to base my opinion off of.

[@JohnSmith-eo2yx]

Totally agreed

[@darrenr90]

I'm waiting for a few more comments before I give my opinion.

[@orangetaho4u207]

*Blind comment about how you're wrong and my guy is better.*😜

[@Clamflesh]

​@orangetaho4u207 ?????? I'm about to read a bunch of shit I've never cared about before for the next two hours just to destroy this one comment. I'm also going to write about how your own perspective doesn't even follow and actually works better for my argument. I'll end my comment with an attempt at disenfranchising how you feel about yourself based on your inability to have a unique thought.

[@RayTheomo]

Turtle guy coming in clutch to call Destiny racist😂

[@spsawyer22]

Destiny is 100% right about the throw away comments staying in partners minds. Told an ex at the beginning of our relationship something that she brought up when i broke up with her. Also 1000% agree re: getting girls off being their problem lol Finally...amen to "dont ask questions you dont want the answer to"

[@QMS9224]

There's no such thing as a throw away comment to a person who is interested in you

[@spsawyer22]

@@QMS9224 you're not wrong but sometimes you think something will be super casual and the next thing you know you're living together

[@Alba-rc4ou]

if u mean you agree that girls are responsible for making sure they get off themselves then that is not a hot take or unique opinion. you don’t have to specify that you agree with it lol it’s always been like that

[@GreiverFenix]

Comparison is the thief of joy.

[@Zgembo121]

Also fear

[@CrazyRockwell]

No, fear is the MIND KILLER... maaaaaaaaan.

[@CutACrow]

Good relationships require mutual respect. If either party lacks such, it will go to ruin.

[@jarad9946]

polling your audience on a meme question will defiantly give a reasonable result

[@jackordway2016]

defiantly

[@idrathernottell361]

Comparisons are such a mind fk. Can and will instantly end relationships 1000%

[@Plight_]

Ex told me her last boyfriend had 10inches. Poisoned the well from there

[@Vinzaf]

I understand what Destiny's saying about The Ick, but honestly the word on its own is just so distasteful that it gives it the appearance of being horrible character flaws. Also, girls do describe the ick as "icky" quite often. It's a massive tiktok trend to do so.

[@ipe0nu]

i learned that i am a boomer and didn't know ick just meant "turn off" thanks for keeping me young lol

[@davec3618]

I one time asked an ex about if there was anything I could do to help a better lover. She proceeded to recount having a train ran on her by the university of Nebraska basketball team and how big they were and if I could get bigger and have as much stamina as 5 professional athletes.... I'm 6'5, well endowed and work out regularly.... She saw my face die as she spoke and immediately started apologizing but the damage was done. I wouldn't have judged the past experience but telling me I would never live up to it was wild.

[@bigdadybojangls9219]

This is 100% a made up story lmfao

[@jxdinglol]

Bro what the fuck? First of all, sorry that happened. Tbh I'm surprised that she even had enough self-awareness to apologize at all. She sounds like a person who used to be extremely shallow before she met you, and she was probably trying to change for the better, but that behavior resurfaced at the worst possible time in the worst possible way, ruining everything y'all had built. Old habits die hard, I guess. Hope she learned her lesson and doesn't do that shit to anyone else ever again. That was BEYOND shameless and that story should've remained an "inside thought."

[@DetectiveStablerSVU]

Wuttttt.

[@davec3618]

@@jxdinglol I was doing 80mph on the highway back from a college football game with her and I asked "baby, is there anything I could do to be a better lover for you?" I wanted to roll the car lol. I'm a pretty sexually successful man so it's not jealousy or anger just not a great feeling when your partner is fantasizing about something you can never be... aka a locker room full of basketball players. I wish I could tell you that she has changed. Later in our relationship she revealed that she had borderline bpd and shortly after that she went no contact from thanksgiving to Christmas which led to a breakup. She has since weaponized some the local "are we dating the same guy" groups to call me a liar for saying that she ghosted me... I don't know what going zero contact with your boyfriend for a month straight until he confronts you and it ends is called besides ghosting but I needed closure.

[@davec3618]

@Akam-pc5pe I don't even judge the experience. I'm pretty damn adventurous and I've done my share of wild experiences and typically in group play I've been the performer... but what I don't do is tell my girlfriend about it in a way that is obviously going to make her feel inadequate. I'm more into the d/s scene and I like some things that make more vanilla girls feel uncomfortable but I have the social damn ques to not ruin someone's confidence.

[@Midnight_Muse313]

Most people want what they can't have, and conversely do not respect or dismiss what they do have.

[@echograpefruit]

When you compliment your partner by saying something is really good or the best ever, you are praising them. When you compliment your partner by comparing them favorably against a previous partner, it can feel like the statement has more to do with your feelings about that previous partner which is why it's weird.

[@narutofan4545]

Sometimes I want to give out purposely bad compliments in order to devalue someone and to let them know that I only see them in a superficial way

[@ghostrecon3834]

r/NPD will be a helpful space for you, friend :)

[@joshtanner8048]

@@ghostrecon3834😂

[@Etaiin]

me when i derive joy from being an insufferable human being 🤗

[@narutofan4545]

@@ghostrecon3834 you sound wounded

[@AnimosityIncarnate]

​@@narutofan4545 watch out for godkillers. They exist 🥴

[@Inst9727]

I feel its about the focus of the compliment, when you point at someone specific like ( your hair is done in such a better way than my Ex used to do ), it doesn't feel like you're complementing the person, it sounds like you're putting the person up so you can put your ex down. Almost like you're using the compliment and by this way the person you're complimenting to say what you really want to say.

[@awsambdaman]

19:00 DESTINY!! THE RULE IS “NOT EVERY TRUE THING NEEDS TO BE SAID. Truth in the service of love”

[@Kaaosification]

In case anyone is interested, the reason why you can't directly make comparisons to other people when complenting someone is because it sound as much like an insult to the other person as a compliment to this person, and throwing petty insults at exes and other people gives off a very negative vibe

[@bearjack3629]

Ick is 100% a new way to call guys creeps

[@bigdadybojangls9219]

No not at all, it’s just a shitty way for women to say that they see a particular behavior as effeminate. I think a lot of guys (NOT ALL) probably get a similar feeling when they see a woman do something that’s particularly masculine like spitting or shotgunning a beer.

[@Maxamush]

It started as a way to describe a single action that makes you lose all interest in a person. This is a totally real feeling that everybody experiences. Shit like being rude to waiting staff or whatever gives you the ick. I can't speak to every usage of the word but it's a totally understandable feeling that people have.

[@SerenaLi-dl9bl]

A creepy behavior can be an ick but icks are usually just dopey or too effeminate behavior.

[@AnimosityIncarnate]

​​@@Maxamush only women I've ever met who used this are Narcissistic as fuck bro, objectifying yourself and others causes that I guess 😂

[@MenchieExtrakt]

Wearing a tank top with a hood is an ick. Its not creepy nor effeminate, its just a turn off

[@Thehatter106]

Not sure if I'm going to watch this, I just wanted to show appreciation for that thumbnail

[@DandyAnnieTime]

"The Ick" as used by most women online is meant to imply something is wrong with the man a lot of the time. Irl it's a lot different, but maybe that's cause I'm a guy so the women I know aren't going to be brazenly sexist in front of me. Personally I think it's cause they're good people but who knows.

[@Nosirt]

Women are probably brazenly sexist towards you in real life- you just don’t care or push that interaction down. Think of a situation where a woman (friend) wearing a short skirt is with you walking and a wind blows her skirt and you see her underwear. Do you feel instinctively uncomfortable for her? Do you think by “seeing” you have caused her uncomfortable feelings? It may sound like a joke but this is part of the sexist model. But you as a man would go your whole life never realizing that “why would it be my fault if she choose to wear it, and a wind happens to blow it? Why would I feel guilty?” When your GF initiates sex, she is never in a million years thinking she would get rejected. That is entitlement- and many men fearing the ridicule of “why wouldn’t you have sex with a woman? Are you gay” would accept their GF’s invite even if they don’t want to. This is also part of the sexism. But I’m sure you never “felt” like it. It feels weird to see yourself as a victim, especially aginst a woman. Women do many things that are blatantly sexist, abusive, and manipulative wide in the open. But many men push down their logical faculty in these situations for social pressure.

[@Tyreeceholmes]

This is something few people understand...I figured this out around 22, and the schlamazzle slaying skyrocketed on till i got married

[@Trecesolotienesdos]

some people enjoy compliments on innate things. since it's part of them. it depends obviously on the person.

[@edwardpeniche1907]

Great, this video reminds me of my past relationship. Now, adult me is going to have to convince child me that suicide isn't the right option for the rest of the day.

[@nathandewar8864]

I think "the ick" is result of someone who knows the type of man they want or don't want. As in they have really narrowed it down to specifics. Now we as Men have often said they we like Women to know what they want and they know that but they will rarely say this type of stuff out loud because it can leave them open to be manipulated. So they keep those specifics hidden except in certain situations or in as in the case of "the ick" it comes out subconsciously.

[@Trizzer89]

Destiny had no argument and he ragequit, LOL.

[@mangarino94]

He doesn't try to engage in good faith with Hoe_Math's content on this stuff. Destiny and HM are both correct in differemt ways about this stuff Yes HM's shit is reductive af but generalizations have their uses

[@SerenaLi-dl9bl]

It’s not bad faith to think something is dumb or reductive. He probably genuinely think it’s too reductive or not useful.

[@g.aathoz1211]

@@SerenaLi-dl9bl You have to listen to more of Hoe_math's content and argument to even come to the conclusion that it is dumb and reductive. Destiny barely finished 3 minutes of his content and did not actually engage in it, Destiny therefore is in no position to call Hoe_math's content dumb or reductive regardless if that is true or not.

[@rhett3185]

@@g.aathoz1211yeah it’s literally what Hassan would’ve done.

[@JackH_123]

@@g.aathoz1211you and hoemath both need to get a life

[@g.aathoz1211]

@@JackH_123 Wow shots fired... Why would you assume I haven't got a rich life outside this comment field, just because you don't? Sounds like you are projecting hard? In regards to hoe_math I really do not care about him, I do not watch his content and think he at best kicks in some open doors and at worst is reductive or just plain wrong. What I pointed out that this Destiny video was lazy and as bad as Hasan's empty chair, no arguments just preaching to the choir. Adding hoe_math in the title was obviously just click bait. It is sad that you do not even read comments before going into simp defense mode for Destiny.

[@Bai_Su_Zhen]

It's pathetic how many people lie about their virginity. I'd be curious about the actual stats but everybody lies so it's always bs.

[@thunderjolt69]

Damn, compliments are more complicated than I thought.

[@ego.solvent]

Was he talking about MBTI when he said 'especially ESTs'?

[@jfklmk13447]

24:05 Idk how this is true, I get the ick about so much shit all the time with women. Aren't most guys like that? You gotta have class and standards, hello?

[@MylesKillis]

6:45 it’s funny because that’s how I know women just don’t find me attractive. Not because they’ve ever told me i’m ugly, but because when I hear them talking about men they do find attractive they never describe men like me. like you’ll sit there and watch them go he’s so tall or I love his hair. but then people are like why are you insecure? Because my entire life, I’ve watched women gush about men they like and not once have those women describe someone like me.

[@tatamigalaxy-i5r]

You can't be serious. If that's you on your profile, then you are the most conventionally attractive fboy on this planet. Hell, if YOU get these reactions, then I might aswell just jump of a bridge, because you look so much better than me. Again, if that's you, then it's definitely just in your head and you need to work on your confidence and social skills. If you are not attractive to women then humanity would probably just end lol You literally have the gigachad jaw/chin and you are ripped af and everything, nahhhh

[@ScottyEdwards801]

I think the complementary part of the stream has to do with specifics vs vague. Specific and she has a clear image or something to latch onto and that can go poorly depending on the situation. Vague and she can come up with the image in a far less threatening way of a singular girl that she has to now feel compared to. It’s like talking about your mom (specific) to women in general (vague). Specific can be powerful but you better be sure you don’t fumble it because it could go to the peak of the mountain or you could end up in hell.

[@gianni50725]

no comments on this specific video from hoe_math (his videos are very hit or miss), but the impression i get is that guy falls into the same RPer archetype of "guy who did absolutely nothing with his life until age 30ish until he figured out what agency is and now has a bit of a complex about it" you can see the cracks come through any time money is discussed, and most of the time only when money is discussed. at the very least he never tries to give whatever nonsense career advice other RPers try to give, so he's still ahead of them on that front for whatever it's worth.

[@aguspuig6615]

7:00 wait am i crazy or that isnt a good example? if youre with a 5,4 gir, wich i assume is short right? and you say ''yeah short girls are so hot'' she probably knows shes short, being short isnt negative for most girls as far as i know, i dont think that would be a mindfucky comment. Like imagine youre a guy with brown hair, and a girl says ''yeah my first bf had brown hair and i loved it, i rly like guys like that'' thats just a compliment. Its not like sayhing ''wow that girl had such bigger tits than you i loved it'' or something like that. Maybe the example wouldve been better if he at least prephrased it saying the 5,4 blonde girl is already insecure about her height

[@chzbrgr123]

Hearing Dman say the main fault is with the woman for not protecting the man's feelings when the man was the initiating party was definitely not a take i was expecting

[@pawel322]

Just reverse the roles and the take makes perfect sense

[@perfectiondreamusa]

even the post itself is an absolute knife in the husband’s insecurities. what she said in person was probably around that bad. any partner should be aware of their partners insecurities and try to avoid attacking them the way this woman is

[@jayoz7746]

@@pawel322no it doesn’t. If your partner asked to have a threesome and the other person is doing a better job than your partner. Then maybe they should take that lesson and try to do a better job themselves. It’s not my fault if I just happened to like it nor would it be my partner’s fault either. Remember, they asked to have this experience. They just didn’t think the experience would also mean the other person could do a better job

[@trumpisarap1st]

If it’s just some dude she’s fucking who cares but it’s her HUSBAND. There should be more consideration of feelings when it’s a spouse.

[@jayoz7746]

@@trumpisarap1st yeah but where was the consideration when he asked for a threesome? How was she supposed to know when he asked for this experience? If my girl were to ask me if we can have a threesome, I’m gonna assume she doesn’t have that insecurity

[@m.czandogg9576]

20:54 Akessonellen vs Destiny. Sheesh, she is S T R O N G

[@ThePyrotechniss]

I would be pissed at the girl for not communicating what she liked she, said he knew exactly what to do, we'll tell him what those things are

[@devaxionrl8189]

2:00 holy shit this pisses me off to no ends

[@WylliamJudd]

OMG, someone tell my wife she doesn't have to tell me about her diarrhea XD

[@Lupostehgreat]

So chemistry is an intangible that just happens when you are with a person. It's this nexus between them not just being "good looking" but having the features that you are drawn to (note, this is why plenty of "ugly" people somehow will land in stable, loving relationships while looks-maxxers will be stuck pursuing other looks-maxxers and utterly alone), a certain charisma that makes them want to spend more time around you (Sense. Of. Humor. Is. Compatible), share similar interests (this is one of the reasons it is easier to meet people at social gatherings for interests you share, and is why older dating sites used to try and group you according to similar interests rather than enshrine physical attraction as paramount when that is the feature most likely to be flexed when picking a long term partner) and similar values (religion, politics, philosophy). It usually comes together at some point when you've spent enough time with a person, and involves interacting with them face to face. The Ick is just another word for "red flags," "deal breakers," etc. As usual, the next generation comes along and believes it's found something new when they just invented a new word for it.

[@calebloveshockey]

"Red flags" and "deal breakers" implies it is something legitimately bad, and worth breaking up over. Not how "the ick" is used at all. The ick is applied to good, normal, and acceptable behaviors.

[@jenispizz2556]

Ranking people is a kinda bad way to look at things, in my opinion. I think of my relationships like I think of food. Sure the food I want to eat most is pizza (romantic partner), but that doesn't diminish how I feel about spaghetti (sister). And sometimes, I just want to go buck wild on a bag of gummy worms (scuffed friendship) more than anything else, even though that food isn't something I'd enjoy as a full course meal. I appreciate many things about each of my exes. Their personalities and bodies were all unique in some way that I appreciated, but that takes nothing away from my current partner. I couldn't rank the sex with them because one had huge tits, and another was super tight or something. I enjoyed each of them uniquely, and because of that all of my partners have been very comfortable with me talking about my exes, and were very comfortable and trusting of me during our relationships. Even though my exes were special to me, my current partner is also super special to me, and that's always been enough for them. There's not an objective list of traits that are better than others, it's just about what you value. Understand that, and express yourself as if you're giving your preference instead of listing a hierarchy of qualities someone can have. After all, Marvel movies are some of the most popular, but does that mean they're "objectively" better than all other movies and you're wrong for liking Blade Runner? No, obviously not, so don't rank people as 7/10 because most others would rank small boobs as worse.

[@halfbloodprincess989]

The "ick" doesn't really have anything to to with being creepy.

[@MrCharly780]

Though editor meant LCK as the lol korean league, sadge.

[@Demirx00]

is there an update on the MMF sex situation?

[@babyelephant3077]

The any sexual contact changed the game 😂

[@AntonioAkaPablo]

You added a lot of women and non gamers to the viewership, so the demo was always going to change

[@kettenschlosd]

if you define masculinity as "doing stuff" then it is no wonder that every ick has to do with lack of it. this guy is playing philosophy on easy mode with definitions as broad as his mom

[@bulldozer8950]

I don’t like the word ick, not because of its meaning or whatever, but because I hate the way it sounds as a word. That and jover I hate. I just hate the actual sound of the word.

[@Solutionsarejustcompromises]

Moar Destiny vs Hoe Math plz

[@67wdz51]

the way I would crash tf out washing my girl get touched up like dat

[@tomlaw8821]

Imagine taking ANY advice from Destiny on girls 😂

[@jjunior2282]

Imagine being one of those guys who has no relationship experience

[@tomlaw8821]

@@jjunior2282 Projecting, I've been with my recent gf for 4 years and we have never gotten in one fight. Destiny is the problem 100% of the time, maybe one day you will learn that.

[@kalipiana3880]

people are seriously taking relationship advice from this guy who has been divorced twice ???

[@AymanPlayer]

You cannot say that he doesn't have enough experience

[@heraldofoblivion499]

Just do the opposite of what he says.

[@VerniasAugoeides]

being divorced twice = literally tautologically and ontologically wrong on everything relationship-wise instantly and forever

[@kalipiana3880]

@@VerniasAugoeides the reality is if destiny was so great at relationships he would not have been divorced twice / had two failed relationships, you are just a destiny simp who will blindly follow his terrible advice..............

[@rhett3185]

I agree with the sentiment, but it’s also important to realise that ‘succeeding’ at a relationship (ie marriage or whatever) is relative. There are people who are still married and due to whatever circumstances aren’t divorced but have terrible relationship dynamics and/or advice themselves. If you’ve ever asked your grandpa/grandma about dating you’d be getting literally outdated obsolete advice from out of touch idiots that got lucky.

[@HandthatRockstWorld]

You know how people lose their minds in a debate with destiny and don't represent their point and then blame destiny for why their point is wrong? That's what's happening here. A man wants a thing. He does not examine that or try to figure it out or really plan for it. Women have to give it to him. So when that goes wrong if given what he wants or if he doesn't get it, there is an external thing to blame without knowing the steps the guy missed in examining his own desires. I have an anecdotal example. I'm bi. My ex husband and I were poly. I mostly agreed because he really wanted it and I was coming out of a religious cult I was raised in AND dealing with military SA I had survived but not gotten therapy for AND I had just given birth to our son and have weird hormone imbalances after babies that make me really dislike sex and intimacy. These were all a disaster waiting to happen. BUT we talked about what would help him and I never told him I would rather not have sex until I wasn't breastfeeding anymore because that would have been hurtful to him. He had other partners but was really in love with a woman that I liked. He wanted to have sex at a concert and I hate concerts and was "feeling the ick" about sex in general. So he went with her. I was happy both of them liked it and had fun and sort of admired them for being brave and sort of wild in comparison to me because I dont have that behavior in me at all. I'm very closed doors for intimacy. He was angry I wasn't hurt or jealous. Meanwhile, I had already planned when we agreed to go poly that IF I had another woman as a partner (his rule was women and no men and I immediately agreed due to the military SA that I wanted nothing to do with more than one man at any time in the room) it would be for me and her and wouldn't be performative or some voyeur thing where we served him. I'd had girlfriends before him and was just bi not some porn star acting out a fantasy for a man. This was my prior planning without anything happening at all yet. Whereas he was all reaction and his insecurities (what he later admitted informed his all women but no men rule) stayed and he never planned for or worked on them. This made every single choice he made or thing he did, my fault. Even when I asked him NOT to do something with another woman, it still ended up as my fault. I made a ton of mistakes here for sure. Im ashamed I could see the difference the moment I caved and started getting therapy for the SA trauma. But by then, it was WAY too late to safe my marriage. He still blames me though. We've been apart for 14 years and divorced for 7 and he STILL blames me for his relationships failing. I've had three since him and I'm taking it super slow since I have so much work to do on me and this third one has stuck a really long time. I want to be a good partner so I have to give it time and care. He's dated over 50 women and I'm to blame for every single one failing. We don't even live in the same state! This is what I mean by men just failing to examine what they want. They aren't trying to work on themselves. And blame the women planning (sometimes to the extent of overkill for sure) well into the future and examining their desires through hypotheticals and experiences). Men just go "me want thing me have" and then RedPillers say that animal idiocy is biology and natural and fake that men haven't already proved how much better they are than nature. Men just need to do the work they've done in the world throughout history on themselves INTERNALLY and grow up a bit with regards to rejection and insecurities. They absolutely can manage this because they've managed other amazing things and this one is easy and kind of boring. I think men have got this but they need tough advice and to stop being coddled for being wrong online all the time.

[@JoyfulSeal-sh9cw]

Crazy amount of yap 💀

[@AnimosityIncarnate]

You destroyed his brain and he lacks the internal mechanisms for a healthy relationship. You gaslight by saying "he was doomed to be that way anyways genetically", despite you being the obvious trigger for him and you still going on about it aswell. Move the fuck on

[@alephnull8377]

It’s the husbands fault because it was his idea

[@danielmccormick2667]

dr k just went in one ear and out the other

[@allisons6910]

How so?

[@danielmccormick2667]

@allisons6910 the entire latter half of their conversation emphasized that this approach of being st the behest of the other person's wants and needs is a bad mentality, and maybe it's good for manipulating people but I'm not sure it's a great long term strategy

[@joshtanner8048]

Lasting change takes a long time to implement

[@allisons6910]

@@danielmccormick2667 ohh true. I haven’t been keeping up as much anymore given he seems intent on throwing away opportunities, growing in character for a day or 3 followed by doubling that time undermining it with "Nebraska Steve" hot flashes or "jokes" that last permanently. He's been on the internet long enough to know that nice gestures/good days don't cancel out thoughtless mistakes/bad days. However, if it were _only_ that, I'd still be here in the trenches defending, but he's gone off the rails with the Israel focus, which I did not complain about once for the first 4.5 months. But after a few weeks post Finkle, and now his next "arc" is to study -WW II- WW I?! It's an election year- No, scratch that. It’s a

[@bb-3653]

​@@danielmccormick2667dr k emphasis alot that its better for people to accept you when your not perfect or a whole person either because then you know your not relying on extremely conditional categories to keep the person around.

[@Satallizer]

the one actual thing I’ve been wanting to talk to destiny about is 3 somes. he doesn’t believe there’s people who watch him who have sex. I’m married my wife and I enjoy women together and have been doing it for like 10 years. we’ve been together almost 15 years and i’m 33. his takes on relationships aren’t too far off, I just usually disagree with his personal relationship decisions which sometime spill over into his commentary on relationships. I’ll say it here since I was banned on kick for it. Letting your wife fuck another guy is a recipe for disaster. always full stop. women can’t love more than one guy in 99.999% of all cases. men on the other hand can have sex with other women and feel nothing for them and still love his wife more than the stars in the universe. it might just be because I only have sex with other women with her but fucking other women changes nothing about how I feel about my wife. if anything I love her more.

[@Alphabet7]

Empathy in a relationship is just being fake and a people pleaser that's what Destiny is saying

[@MrSemanticprison]

Wait but she didnt come back and tell her bf - he was there and saw it happen. How is that her fault?

[@xokirei]

love destiny and don’t have an opinion on hoe math, but felt a bit strange for him to make that comment abt confidence being the most important character trait, then for some reason not understanding saying the exact same thing in different words? maybe he didn’t like the breakdown of confidence into a masculine vs feminine cause he is a feminist (objectively good thing btw not whatever cringe social media shit ppl think of), but i feel like he goes a little too hard on the not gendering traits thing when 1. that’s how most ppl operate even if it’s not what he does so it’s a useful lens to understand and reference, and 2. are those auxiliary traits not even necessarily flowing down from stuff he already thinks on a fundamental level. to be specific (although i wouldn’t phrase it this way just cause it feels strange optically) is the whole “doing things” vs “having things done unto you” not literally just a generalized abstraction of “men are the ones who approach” and women are the ones who approach”- which is very literally the thing he was saying in the beginning of the video, and for better or worse just a lender of the world the vast majority of ppl operate on and will probs always operate on. to the video’s point, i think it’s more than fair to generalize getting the ick as just not liking when someone you’re attracted to, but not enough to tolerate everything from, does something that goes against the gendered expectations associated with them. like with the video of the woman i thought it was kinda funny that she was literally just saying the inverse abt what destiny said abt possessiveness; she enjoys it on an individual level even if she’ll say she’s against it on a general and collective level. that’s true with so much in life that idky we have a problem saying aloud when women do it? an example for a man (i don’t think his personal anecdotes are typical male experiences so maybe that’s the disconnect) could literally just be finding a woman attractive, but not attractive enough to tolerate things that you even superficially care abt from, so when they’re are out drinking even if *HE’S* were the one that invited her out he’ll feel “the ick” or turned off by her actually getting drunk. ridiculously common thing that happens with men and it goes in line with what he said abt it’s not even a matter of objective behaviour, but i think where he would say “chemistry”, most ppl would interpret to just mean what you are or aren’t willing to tolerate from someone you’re just starting to build an attraction towards. that’s why i think it’s a fair observation to say most of these stories are never coming from married people or people in long term relationships, cause even if certain behaviours/traits presented themselves that you know you don’t like, your high level of attraction to them will supersede your dislike of those traits. i don’t think that’s an unreasonable position

[@HandthatRockstWorld]

I caution all couples about men who want threesomes. They think they want it because they're stupid with porn brain but they never do want it later and even if the guy demands it, when he hates it, its your fault. Also, I disagree with hiding your thoughts from your partner. But I agree that you shouldn't ask questions you don't want answers to AND that you should always find the kindest way to be truthful with your partner. The dude in the reddit story seems more upset with realizing he needs to improve than he is with getting what he wanted. There are kind ways to help him be better at sex and if he still resists, he's the problem and needs to do tons of work on himself. Since he's your partner, you should facilitate that and be patient and understanding while he works on himself. Partner means the dude doesn't have to do it alone and you've already agreed to help him the best you can.

[@JoyfulSeal-sh9cw]

woman for sure

[@connorp3030]

You're right, no dude has ever enjoyed a threesome Anytime anyone has a sexual interest that isn't missionary it's just porn brain

[@Trecesolotienesdos]

Dest providing autistic correction tips to his audience.

[@georgewarrick3535]

Holy shit destinys kick chatters are deranged

[@righteousrawb7225]

4:03

[@aguy9071]

Hoe math is funny lol

[@bb-3653]

Hes funny but spreading alot of missinfo and pseudoscience etc. He makes these charts and what not but its actually re packaging red pilled rhetoric in a way. It seems straightforward and "logical' but who the hell will look at that content and want to even attempt to persue women after that if they believe this is how it works. Crazy Like "ah yes you stepping on your lace slightly killed attraction in your gf because it showed a loss of control and therefore lack of masculinity" as exxagerated as it might be it points to milder semblances of truth which can still arguable be negitively percieved because its still rediculous if womenas a whole actually thought like that . So yeah i find it funny but bad overall.

[@Valfor-kt3im]

5:25

[@plormfingaround9962]

16:22

[@g.aathoz1211]

Here I expected a long awaited take down of Hoe_math but well I guess Destiny has no arguments... I mean are you lazy or just farming clicks putting Hoe_math in the title but not even engaging in his arguments? I mean Hoe_math may have shitty psycho-analytical arguments but you lose on walk-over when not even listening properly and not engaging his arguments.

[@Mintlll]

So my roomate believes the most masculine thing a woman can do is give birth. He’s insane right?

[@Peri_Dovis]

Perfectly.

[@amagicallaura]

i don't think so. going through a terrible ordeal, being brave & strong etc. are v much coded masculine

[@Mintlll]

@@amagicallaura but why is being brave and strong masculine coded? Would make a lot more sense if they’re fighting a war but instead they’re giving birth. When you say it like that it doesn’t work

[@allisons6910]

@@Mintlll Your rm is a sexist, lmk if this gets censored

[@amagicallaura]

@@Mintlll i agree that being brave & strong isn't essentially masculine, i'm just saying those traits are societally coded as masculine

[@_moonmoth]

Guys who get mad over those ick videos and freak out over it are screaming with entitlement. Like, obviously someone can get turned off of someone over seemingly small things. It’s what happens. And just because you’re down bad and could never see the girl you’re interested in as less attractive for any reason doesn’t mean she is. Fuck it, just accept it and move on

[@SleepBeforeYouThink]

A girl getting cancer or saying she loves her mom doesn’t give me the ick. But women have said those two things give them the ick when referring to guys. It’s more than just a turn off, it’s an empathy thing. When I see these type of “icks” I’m gonna shit on the girl saying it idc.

[@radioact1ve808]

Aren't you just doing the same thing? People who are mad about ick stuff are basically just saying having an ick chart is their ick. They ARE entitled to get mad over petty behavior and small faults like that.

[@muddavadda]

I havent watched a lot of these, but I think the issues for guys are 1) girls presenting their "icks" in a pretty condescending and disrespectful way or 2) the "icks" being quite... unreasonable (which is fine if it turns them off, but guys are also allowed to make fun of them).

[@orangutanenthusiast5631]

This comment is icky

[@_moonmoth]

@@SleepBeforeYouThink I mean yeah that’s horrible and extreme but I’m willing to bet that kind of stuff is also not very common. Same can be said for the fringe of guys who say if a girl has been with more than two guys in her past she’s a whore who belongs on the street. And it’s valid to make fun of people who are so extreme, but not the whole concept of turn offs or icks.

[@anubisgod23]

I did a MMF with my missus. Worth it. So much fun