Today Now! talks with a diet book author who reveals that many things are surprisingly edible when you are driven mad by hunger. More coverage at: onion.com
Пікірлер: 2 200
@vexivero9 жыл бұрын
Air has about .057 calories per breath. Reducing your air intake will significantly help in losing weight.
@Dcook859 жыл бұрын
+Vexivero VXVO Especially once you get to the decomposition phase of your diet. THE FAT JUST MELTS AWAY!
@aidanmco7 жыл бұрын
Tregeta Doctor who!!!
@abcd1239067 жыл бұрын
Vexivero Absolutely not true. There are 86,400 seconds in a day. If we take a breath every 3 seconds, that would be (86,400 / 3) x 0.057 = 1,642 calories. That's over 3/4 of the recommended 2,000 calorie daily intake. So we should only be eating
@klille7 жыл бұрын
that's those hidden calories she was talking about in the video
@colton21937 жыл бұрын
I'm too fat to look it up, but if air did in fact have calories, it would be considered a constant or stable variable,. This means that since we are all breathing (as we are living) any calculations of necessary daily caloric intake would be independent of this. I found vexivero's comment to be hilarious, then i found yours and thought it was intelligent, but logically inconsistent. I may or may not be onioning you right now... But it sounded damn good.
@abcd1239067 жыл бұрын
Think about the fact that they actually had to find a woman who was that thin who was willing to make a parody of herself. I mean, she is a real human actor after all. Where do they find these people!?
@atlanticmetal60016 жыл бұрын
They didnt. They made her.
@omikron62186 жыл бұрын
Reico Dov they locked her up until she looked like that
@jodiebug15 жыл бұрын
This is the only thing I can think of as I watch this
@joshuastoughton94445 жыл бұрын
I wonder that all the time, especially when they hire people to play the part of really fat/ugly/whatever unsatisfying role the actor is playing so the audience has something to laugh at; I still enjoy this kind of "offend everyone humor", although only if its intended to entertain and not solely mock an individual, but anyways I dont know how some actors put themselves through it.
@LusciousTwinkle5 жыл бұрын
@May Robinson I think you are right. She might have Marfan Syndrome or something..
@hannahmullen48978 жыл бұрын
Wherever this woman is, I hope she is OK.
@jackspicer49077 жыл бұрын
She exclusively eats inanimate objects. She's not OK.
@harrisonbraun48627 жыл бұрын
...............but this isn't real?
@steeldutchess7 жыл бұрын
Of course, it isn't real (the show and her character), but her body is quite real. Actors do do weird things for their roles: Christian Bale lost 60 lbs for his role in The Machinist. But that was for a FILM and it took him several months. And still, he didn't look as malnourished as this actress. So, the concern for her health is reasonable. I don't know how long it took her to prepare for the role, I just hope she isn't this skinny due to an illness.
@AtlasReburdened7 жыл бұрын
Unfortunately, it's more than likely that she has a genetic disorder which doesn't allow her body to store fat or produce some key metabolic enzyme. I doubt she forced herself into that condition. The ethics of it breaches even what the onion is willing to do. All things considered, if she made it to that age she probably has access to appropriate enough treatment that she should have a relatively normal lifespan, and its probably better than the opposite.
@VineFynn7 жыл бұрын
Yeah if she loses some weight she'll be fine
@hoonaignachowaneha5 жыл бұрын
This is one of the darkest things they ever did holy shit lmao.
@magnuspeacock58574 жыл бұрын
Have you seen porking across america? That one is dark.
@Creedio904 жыл бұрын
have you seen the “death penalty” skit? that one is dark
@fbk27664 жыл бұрын
@@magnuspeacock5857 Because of this comment I watched it and now I'm completely scarred for life. Thank u.
@magnuspeacock58574 жыл бұрын
@@fbk2766 sorry
@Crystal-od5is4 жыл бұрын
@@magnuspeacock5857 lmfaooo I'm so glad I came across your comment. It's a masterpiece in disguise.
@grumzley9 жыл бұрын
The onion and its teaser headlines! My baby is only 6 weeks old, but has got mistaken for 8 weeks old. I want to know how to make her look a beautiful 3 weeks old again!
@gardenofroses1979 жыл бұрын
why do I feel like this is a math problem?
@grumzley9 жыл бұрын
***** please tell me you are just playing along. If you are actually taking my comment seriously....yikes.
@TCt830676956 жыл бұрын
gardenofroses197 lol it reads like it is
@UnitAlir6 жыл бұрын
Stop feeding your baby razors. Razors contain a shocking 70 calories.
@lordofthecats63975 жыл бұрын
I put my baby in a pressure cooker. 10lbs less, and four inches shorter, which is the key. I've had a few people ask me "when are you expecting?"
@RowdyDandy4 жыл бұрын
She truly seems happy, her saying it over and over again at the end really convinced me
@dylancombs4168 жыл бұрын
"I saw the brocade. It had to be inside me." I can't stop laughing at this.
@TheTitanJesus6 жыл бұрын
What's brocade?
@spiddyman00795 жыл бұрын
Alexander Schoen idk. What is it
@spiddyman00795 жыл бұрын
A-Innovations ya same
@Anastas17865 жыл бұрын
@@TheTitanJesus Brocade is highly-decorated shuttle-woven fabric, often in silk and sometimes with gold or silver thread. Basically, she ate a _really_ fancy-looking pillow. Wikipedia is your friend.
@mattrogers51889 ай бұрын
@@Anastas1786 It can be a lying friend, though. I know because I used to edit Wikipedia. It's easy to post disinformation there that has staying power. Just make something up, post it, and add a really lengthy source that takes a long time to double-check. When someone finally removes the disinformation, quickly put it back with a different source. For definitions, I just do a search like "brocade merriam" to find the Merriam-Webster entry. It's a little shorter than Wikipedia, but I know it isn't just made up.
@CWINDOWSsystem326 жыл бұрын
I wonder who the actress is, and what her condition is. At least she's able to make fun of situation by being on the Onion...
@reanetsemoleleki82194 жыл бұрын
She doesn't have to have a condition. Some people are just that skinny.
@alyssapc25244 жыл бұрын
No one is ‘just that skinny’ on accident. She either has an eating disorder or some sort of physical disorder. This does not ‘just happen’ in America. Something is wrong.
@staalman12264 жыл бұрын
@@alyssapc2524 I have an internet connection, which entitles me to make profound statements about someone's health with little to no qualification, and completely ignore the poor people in America who can't eat enough, just based on how someone looks!
@reanetsemoleleki82194 жыл бұрын
@@staalman1226 I think that was sarcasm.
@staalman12264 жыл бұрын
@@reanetsemoleleki8219 Alyssa PC definitely wasn't, I might've been . . .
@JadeyCatgirl99 Жыл бұрын
As someone who struggled with anorexia, I can attest that these are the crazy leaps your brain starts to make after a while
@placeholderdoe Жыл бұрын
I hope your struggle becomes less hard
@doltBmB11 ай бұрын
problem with malnutrition is it makes it hard to think clearly unfortunately
@totalweirdo853811 ай бұрын
I'm mostly recovered from my eating disorder, but there was a point where I was genuinely googling how many calories you could gain from chewing at your own mouth.
@luke832910 ай бұрын
You should try the eat some food diet, It has always worked for me.
@salsamancer6 жыл бұрын
This is the most uncomfortable I've ever been watching the Onion
@HaxxorElite5 жыл бұрын
Why?
@revolver2655 жыл бұрын
Yeah, throughout this entire video I was so tense just waiting for her to keel over.
@AlexWyattDrums5 жыл бұрын
Try Porkin Across America. Yikes.
@joeyexos65675 жыл бұрын
That was pretty lame comment
@gendoruwo63225 жыл бұрын
you wanted to eat her didn't you? aw don't worry about it, we've all been there.
@adamchahine88704 жыл бұрын
It’s been 12 years and I haven’t seen a comment acknowledging the beginning? Chinese acrobats who make you forget the horrors of their government was probably one of the funniest parts of this clip
@krismine994 жыл бұрын
So true, essentially that's what their version of diplomacy does. No problems in Hong Kong here, or Wuhan, those muslims volunteered to be educated by the state. Everybody just turns their heads
@daftzilla4 жыл бұрын
All the comments you're looking for were censored and the Chinese government dragged off the people who said them
@kcfish48623 жыл бұрын
New ones coming up with India and Taiwan
@Emile.gorgonZola3 жыл бұрын
Hollywood makes you forget the horrors of their government - same thing
@jenm13 жыл бұрын
@@Emile.gorgonZola Thank you.
@prophetofprosperity11079 жыл бұрын
This episode and the one where the cancer patient dies live were the two most risque of all time. They went there.
@hampannswede9 жыл бұрын
prophetofdoom where can i find the other one?
@DragonslayerProd9 жыл бұрын
+hampannswede Courageous Man Refuses To Believe He Has Cancer
@batron60306 жыл бұрын
prophetofdoom risque, I thought that was a joke word :0
@kyleyoung19826 жыл бұрын
as long as you're willing to double-click words, English never stops
@colinmurphy22144 жыл бұрын
Risqué means sexual? No?
@firstnamelastname69298 жыл бұрын
How to make your baby look younger........ I'm speechless.
@hhds1139 жыл бұрын
How many calories from laughing at this video?
@gardenofroses1979 жыл бұрын
hhds113According to Vexivero VXVO, you're on your way to significant weight loss.
@hhds1139 жыл бұрын
jackthayer Hay I'm not fat
@harrisonpost58466 жыл бұрын
267 its all in the book
@magicawesomemukbangasmr16156 жыл бұрын
Enough to eat 3.5 standard pink erasers or 16 paper clips!
@CherryBlossomOhka5 жыл бұрын
Not enough
@catherinestickels25914 жыл бұрын
Everyone talking about the anorexia, nobody talking about the pica
@Apricus14 жыл бұрын
Anorexia Nervosa and Bulimia Nervosa are the two eating disorders that people usually know. Nobody really talks about the other eating disorders or any of the subtypes.
@hannahferolie-ragin83474 жыл бұрын
Exactly what I was thinking, but i guess people don't always know what that is.
@kitcoffey71943 жыл бұрын
And no one talking about untreated pancreatic disease that can cause this. Uncontrollable diarrhea ain't fun, inability to digest fat ain't fun. Maybe this society should have any puboic restrooms at all
@geopat42983 жыл бұрын
I know, I have pica and eat Kleenex and toilet paper... I'm like, what's the joke?
@agneskirsch83353 жыл бұрын
@@Apricus1 you're completely right, how did I miss that?
@SomeChickNamedStella Жыл бұрын
As an anorexic woman who is still suffering from this disease I believe my ticket to hell has been upgraded from coach to first class after laughing so hard I couldn’t breathe to this video.
@poiewhfopiewhf11 ай бұрын
you're not alone
@barsabe11 ай бұрын
@@poiewhfopiewhfhi diagonal me
@placeholderdoe10 ай бұрын
Wishing you well in the future, you deserve help. I really hope its gets better for you
@jonaspaulsson99129 ай бұрын
❤
@localCrows3 ай бұрын
hopefully you didn't stop breathing after reading the comments about calories in air. ;) And I hope you are/get as well as possible. ❤
@brendonhavener4 жыл бұрын
Nobody I know of who started the no food diet has complained about it after the first month or so.
@drabberfrog4 жыл бұрын
That sounds like a good sign if you ask me
@Blueberryyymuffin3 ай бұрын
It’s the quitters who complain 🙄
@EGarrett0116 жыл бұрын
Not only do these guys do great comedy, they have balls of absolute steel. Can you imagine pitching this sketch to a network?
@BigOlSmellyFlashlight Жыл бұрын
crazy is that the onion did air on a network for a short time in 2011
@leminjapan Жыл бұрын
Yes, because this actually aired on TV
@EGarrett01 Жыл бұрын
@@leminjapan I wrote this comment years before the Onion show aired. Onion news network debuted 12 years ago, this comment is 14-years-old.
@joshhauskins8939 Жыл бұрын
@@EGarrett01 holy shit i've never seen a youtube comment thread span over a decade
@mattrogers51889 ай бұрын
@@joshhauskins8939 E Garrett had to come back and defend his honor
@joeskis9 жыл бұрын
That's great that she's willing to make light of her situation. Kinda like Michael J Fox in his Curb Your Enthusiasm episode.
@RyanLynch17 жыл бұрын
joeskis it's a satirical show
@TheChickenRiceBowl7 жыл бұрын
Ryan Lynch Yes we know but she still has a good sense of humor about her situation because she's on The Onion. Y'all are so excited to jump on anyone that falls for the satire you're making yourselves look like idiots.
@TCt830676956 жыл бұрын
joeskis what is her situation? Does anyone know?
@maxjacobs61886 жыл бұрын
TCt83067695 anorexia obviously
@TCt830676956 жыл бұрын
Max Jacobs it might be something else not so ostensible
@EmperorsNewWardrobe4 жыл бұрын
The joke is structurally good, granted, but I’m actually glad that so many in the comments section are human enough to be more concerned about this ill actor than the satire itself
@bigbonedalbert14524 жыл бұрын
If she wanted pity, she would have been on a real morning show. Just have a laugh like she intended
@EmperorsNewWardrobe4 жыл бұрын
Big Boned Albert, sympathy or not (which is distinct from pity by the way), it’s not necessarily only about her. It’s about whether we laugh at people who are genuinely suffering.
@h10hunter3 жыл бұрын
"ill actor". I have decided that she is ill, i must point it out and feel happy that I tell myself and everyone else - I accept her! All that I can talk about is her because she is the only thing about this video that is outstanding! Our coulture can only accept people by separating them from "normal" individuals!
@alcarbo86133 жыл бұрын
She an ACTRESS they probably put her in make up to make her look worse in real life she’s probably just naturally thin
@Punkini3 жыл бұрын
It looks like it’s Marfan syndrome, a disorder of the connective tissues that causes extreme thinness. With appropriate treatment the syndrome can be managed luckily :)
@blakliffy15 жыл бұрын
Did you know? "eating a box of thumbtacks will keep you feeling full all the way to the hospital" that was win
@1purapericulo9 жыл бұрын
Alana looks amazing and so healthy!! She's so inspiring
@DrDomich5 жыл бұрын
And so happy, isn't she? 🙂
@gendoruwo63225 жыл бұрын
so happy happy
@kingofthorns2033 жыл бұрын
She's an inspiration
@manuel5114 Жыл бұрын
@Leandro Aude Bet she's been eating too many phone cords
@faraht2276 жыл бұрын
“I’m happy with myself. I’m happy with my body image. I’m just a happy happy person. Oh I’m just so happy. Oh boy Am I so happy!” Cracks me up
@angelofdeath2754 жыл бұрын
I know the onion is satire but I hope the “author” lady is ok. I hope shes like recovering from an eating disorder or a genetic disease and was willing to joke about herself
@drabberfrog4 жыл бұрын
Same
@Punkini3 жыл бұрын
It looks like it’s Marfan syndrome, a disorder of the connective tissues that causes extreme thinness. With appropriate treatment the syndrome can be managed luckily :)
@RichoRosai3 жыл бұрын
Yeah, because actors don't exist.
@punkgrl3253 жыл бұрын
She's just a skinny old lady.
@dewilew21372 жыл бұрын
@@Punkini I couldn’t place the disorder at first, but once you mentioned it, I rewatched and noticed her long hands and fingers, particularly her thumbs, and I think you’re exactly right.
@Cloudipy4 жыл бұрын
"so practical!" lmao I love how these 2 always react so professional and impressed no matter how crazy the script is
@kreskinkun16 жыл бұрын
When she said she's still fat I just died laughing. I love how these guys go on about this stuff so very seriously.
@MelB8684 жыл бұрын
It made me sad and uncomfortable
@shrekonion83074 жыл бұрын
@@MelB868 well stop being a bitch then
@cameronschyuder9034 Жыл бұрын
common way anorexic people perceive themselves, so unfortunately this is not far from reality
@superhond173310 ай бұрын
@@MelB868i normally dont say this. But... Nobody asked.
@faceoctopus457110 ай бұрын
@@superhond1733 You should say it even less often.
@Squidlark4 жыл бұрын
"That telephone you've been craving, go ahead you can eat it Just don't eat the cords and the buttons." "Oh, why not?" lol
@whatdoesthisthingdo5 жыл бұрын
That poor actress. Hope she’s alright.
@natedog694203 жыл бұрын
She wasnt even that anorexic
@Appleeater01153 жыл бұрын
Always wonder where the onion found all these highly professional and dedicated actors/actresses. Even stranger, none of them are familiar faces from any other programs, which makes their fake news/talk shows appear even more authentic.
@Mr_Valentin.2 жыл бұрын
I'm a big fan of her, i ate all her books.
@maryjanehansen79474 ай бұрын
pppppphphphhphhhhp
@Grandpaconway16 жыл бұрын
I am in tears. "I looked at a pillow and I had to have it." A tennis ball is filled with air. I have been reading the Onion since it's inception and it is still funny.
@leonthethird7494 Жыл бұрын
still funny 14 years later
@bohemianfarmlady46194 жыл бұрын
as someone with an eating disorder, this video make me laugh my skinny ass off. all the comments saying “i hope she’s ok.” don’t worry about it, she’s obviously able to make jokes about whatever condition she has, she is an amazing strength. one of my fav videos when i’m down, so funny.
@randominternetguy35373 жыл бұрын
Hope you are getting help for your eating disorder. Also, yea, she didn't do this for pity, she did it because she understands comedy
@nonyab56403 жыл бұрын
Not everyone who sees a very skinny person talking about losing weight thinks it’s funny. They might think it’s disturbing. You can get the joke and still not like what’s happening. She’s literally dying. People have compassion.
@bohemianfarmlady46193 жыл бұрын
@@nonyab5640 just because we are able to laugh with someone about a situation doesn't mean we're not compassionate. I think you're mistaking the laughing at this video with laughing at her, rather than with her. If you don't like the joke thats okay, no one is forcing you to watch this video.
@nonyab56403 жыл бұрын
@@bohemianfarmlady4619 Boy do you like to tell people what to do! Don’t ask if she’s ok, don’t worry about her, don’t watch the video. You assume a lot too. People don’t get the joke, people don’t understand you can be both humorous and compassionate... I took issue with you telling people not to worry if she’s ok. That’s it. How about, people are allowed to worry and it’s fine and normal to worry. You don’t get to tell them there’s something wrong with that. They are also able to get humor at the same time.
@bohemianfarmlady46193 жыл бұрын
@@nonyab5640 that’s literally what i’m saying as well. when it comes to not to worry, it’s in reference to the rude comments on her weight that people often think is “supportive”. she participated in a comedy skit and reading comments shaming her body as a way to “ worry”or be “concerned” probably isn’t fun lmfao. everyones aloud their opinions but if it’s rude to a persons appearance or is super unnecessary, then it’s probably best to keep it to yourself.
@rowelle16 жыл бұрын
I love how all the guests on this show, even though they're actors, look very genuine. Their acting is so real sometimes I forget I'm watching something that's fake.
@powerpc1278 жыл бұрын
I feel that people just need to love the skin they're in. Once I became happy with my body, I was able to stop worrying about the calories in the piece of floss I was using or the fingernail I had been chewing on all day and just eat them. Sure, I notice people staring at me and saying things like "He must weigh 120 pounds," but if that's the price of happiness then I'm willing to pay it.
@Mischa21xo7 жыл бұрын
😅😅😅😅💜
@themagicsweettartpills95186 жыл бұрын
Why of all places do you choose this video to say this?
@Tracuer2216 жыл бұрын
This is bad advice, though. There's no calories in either of those examples. Rather than being content with being a fat pig/brittle skeleton, educate yourself. Be healthy, happy, and educated instead of "happy" and unhealthy.
@jeffthevomitguy11786 жыл бұрын
what exactly, calories are actually just a hoax designed by the US government to keep the public distracted from real problems. WAKE UP
@justinfung43516 жыл бұрын
Please be joking. I legitimately can't tell.
@aidanchalkley80724 жыл бұрын
“I’m still fat” sent me 😂
@KABOODLE56215 жыл бұрын
Wow, I can't believe that amazing info. about eating the phone! I've been eating the whole blessed thing, buttons and all. No wonder my thighs rub together.
@AndrewRKenny Жыл бұрын
I hope she's okay. She delivered an amazing performance.
@Draginvry212 жыл бұрын
"How to make your baby look younger." LOL
@goodsleepinghobbits52655 жыл бұрын
"I saw the brocade, it had to be inside me.."
@apindian16 жыл бұрын
What about Tide pods ?
@TheTitanJesus6 жыл бұрын
Underrated
@lordofthecats63975 жыл бұрын
Terrible amounts of fat. I have no idea where this "they are superfood ideal for growing adolescents" thing came from. Stick with proven methods such as breaking off tree bark with your bare hands.
@jacobp9485 жыл бұрын
Stfu
@nuclearcatbaby11315 жыл бұрын
Tide Pods are certified kosher.
@Lana-my2tj5 жыл бұрын
Absolutely unacceptable those are way to fatning
@jodanfett861110 жыл бұрын
I suddenly feel very very very obese.
@zhiaxiz75788 жыл бұрын
This is beyond satire...
@JohnDoe-iz2po8 жыл бұрын
Grow some balls
@kyliodatter8 жыл бұрын
+John Doe No shit.
@gendoruwo63225 жыл бұрын
careful , even balls have calories.
@kornpops12613 жыл бұрын
❄️ alert
@andyt85042 жыл бұрын
These two onion cohosts are fantastic. The female, “Tracey Gill” is just wonderful. Her facial expressions when her male partner is talking are priceless.
@axl_tamm7182 жыл бұрын
0:10 AAAAA, Onion has absolutely 0 filters in their writing LMAO
@yautjacetanu9 жыл бұрын
This is dark!
@Heraclitean Жыл бұрын
Those news anchors are two of the greatest "straight men" of all time.
@Melissamms3 жыл бұрын
I would honestly hope this woman went on this show because she was recovering and thought joking about it would help on her journey.
@thegreatcthulhu80494 жыл бұрын
"Just don't eat the cord and the buttons." "Oh why not?" 😂
@damdamfino3 ай бұрын
“I saw the brocade and it had to be inside of me.” One of the best lines I have ever heard.
@soccernoodle17x4 ай бұрын
This lady is able to laugh about her own condition. She’s accepted it and knows what’s wrong and that’s the biggest part of recovering. I hope she’s great!
@JerkDouglas5 жыл бұрын
The Onion yet again knifes their audience and bleeds them out quietly in an alley.
@H1SD3 жыл бұрын
Kind of sad that the chinese acrobats bit at the start is still relevant
@lordtalon6916 жыл бұрын
I usually don't let any of these bother me haha. But i'll admit my jaw dropped when i saw the author. I mean in all seriousness i hope thats either edited or she is getting the help she needs. That aside once she started talking i couldn't stop laughing. And the "did you know?" facts are absolutely hilarious....
@DuckInGameStop3 жыл бұрын
"Did You Know? A bowl of thumbtacks will keep you full all the way to the hospital!" 😂😂😂
@waIIflower15 жыл бұрын
I would recommend this diet to anyone. I lost 291lbs in just a couple of months and I'm telling all my friends about it! This truly is a miracle diet!
@Paclac15 жыл бұрын
2:21 "Chewing On Rocks Just Three Hours A Day Burns As Many Calories As Doing Twenty Sit-Ups" LOL!
@frak7190 Жыл бұрын
"A bowl of thumbtacks will keep you feeling full all the way to the hospital" made me laugh out loud
@brianna0948 жыл бұрын
Oh the ending is just too good
@rweikert65547 жыл бұрын
+Bri I like her honesty towards the end of the clip where she admits to still being a big fat porker.
@jjackson47545 ай бұрын
She was so great. Fit the part and a damn good actress. In fact, the acting in ALL of these skits are top notch. Why can't the Onion bring these back?
@userneime4 жыл бұрын
Wow her acting is eerily good. She's able to convey this mental and physical instability with her look, her shaky voice. So much so people are actually worried about her in the comments. Her delivery is very deadpan and she established a complete character with so few lines.
@MoonChild14515 жыл бұрын
"The telephone you have been craving, you can eat it." LOL You can also add a side of fresh ear bud spaghetti and ping pong balls. XD
@ForrestEvans42013 жыл бұрын
"Ive Gone home and looked at a pillow and had to have it" ahhahahah
@TheGloriousLobsterEmperor Жыл бұрын
How do you think the casting for this went?
@karlhungus5554 Жыл бұрын
Probably better than it would go today.
@AneeshSeeYay3 жыл бұрын
Please help me..... I'm dying of laughter 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
@fettuccinewrap77157 жыл бұрын
its called a breatharian not kidding look it up
@dustingleason59255 жыл бұрын
Fettuccine Wrap you didn’t watch the video
@kenyonpapen26085 жыл бұрын
Dustin Gleason he did but it is a real thing
@dustingleason59255 жыл бұрын
Kenyon papen i know but they eat nothing. The joke here is that he eats everything other than actual food.
@theuncalledfor4 жыл бұрын
@@dustingleason5925 Breatherians _claim_ they eat nothing, but if someone monitors them to make sure they're not lying, they _mysteriously_ begin starving to death. Also, that's not the joke here at all. I do not understand how you could possibly misunderstand such an obvious joke this badly. Besides, it's not the same thing. Breatharianism is about being enlightened and subsisting off the magical "prana" in the air and not _needing_ food, whereas in video they want to eat as little as possible in order to lose weight. Eating non-food is just a way to shut up the screaming hunger pains in your stomach.
@Skindoggiedog4 жыл бұрын
Kids be like "look it up" to things most people have known for decades.
@inquiririddles3 жыл бұрын
She freaking ate this role up 👏
@rowelle16 жыл бұрын
The Onion is awesome! I love how all the guests on this show are so believable! They're all such great actors :)
@shoepermanbutthman21889 жыл бұрын
She became serious while saying she is happy with herself and her body... Moved me....
@0Heavy0Metal012 жыл бұрын
So true, so true. I too love chewing on the conference table at work. And Post-It-Notes! What a treat! What you don't realize is that even though your taking in those extra calories, you are getting valuable roughage! The fiber content of plywood is stunning! And paper...well, it's off the charts. So don't feel too bad. Your intestines will love you!
@mtotowamidiri4 жыл бұрын
After watching Porkin’ Across America I really needed to come back to these to remember when Jim was happy
@plmafx1865 жыл бұрын
How did they find a woman willing to do this
@tdriggers736410 жыл бұрын
I wonder how many calories I intake my licking my mouse?
@gigabic74879 жыл бұрын
*deep russian voice* one million calories
@Colin124757 жыл бұрын
No, that's the number of bacteria per square inch.
@jjlatinopedia6 жыл бұрын
I serve myself 1 Tablespoon of my own semen. It's an addiction really.
@muiresuilgorm34526 жыл бұрын
OrganicChemistry2 lots of protein.
@Randopatchi6 жыл бұрын
Computer or rodent?
@colleenwilliams16894 жыл бұрын
"How to make your baby look younger" sure was comic relief. The video reminded me of a book I read about Shostakovich that focused partly on the Siege of Leningrad. Their food was bombed and while some people hoarded butter and chocolate and ate well, others were eating the glue from book bindings, which were derived from animal parts. Or worse things.
@GC-fj4lc3 жыл бұрын
Didn't think I'd come across a comment about the 7th symphony and the siege of Leningrad, but you're so right about the horrors of the ordeal. There are also numerous reports of cannibalism during the siege. I feel for the victims who are now forgotten because no one talks about it.
@YeahButCanISniffUrPantsFist3 жыл бұрын
wait, Shostakovich survived the Leningrad Siege? omg..
@YeahButCanISniffUrPantsFist3 жыл бұрын
@@GC-fj4lc its understandable that prople dont talk about it. Not everything needs to be talked about
@jayking7713 Жыл бұрын
That opening line...
@keribere2442 жыл бұрын
“A bowl of thumbtacks will keep you feeling full all the way to the hospital”.
@jfuite16 жыл бұрын
Excellent acting - all three; great writing; slick presentation; these skits deserve more views really.
@kieranbrady1240 Жыл бұрын
It totally is, but I have to ask is this account still active?
@jfuite Жыл бұрын
@@kieranbrady1240 Why do you have to ask? You can check out the activity of this account yourself. Anyway, the answer is no.
@kieranbrady1240 Жыл бұрын
@@jfuite so I even get a reply 14 years later? Fascinating
@jfuite Жыл бұрын
@@kieranbrady1240 No, I answered after about three hours later.
@kieranbrady1240 Жыл бұрын
@@jfuite no I mean the original comment I was replying to was 14 years old, this account must be ancient
@7cassandraecw3784 жыл бұрын
How to Pica and still count your calories! You can eat your pillow stuffing in moderation! Just keep a schedule and face facts!
@cronot77 жыл бұрын
THIS is the Onin that will make them viral again!!!
@spyguy62497 жыл бұрын
this video is from 2008............
@ameliabrittain1584 жыл бұрын
As someone with it an eating disorder, it do be like this sometimes
@patrickmcdaniel81233 жыл бұрын
"It's a journey." .......I'm sorry, but I just had to laugh out loud! This is such dark humor! OMG!
@micktrice469 жыл бұрын
What about strings from my blanket? How much are those?
@lucasboden10 жыл бұрын
She was featured on Dr Oz.
@DarleyHavidsun6 жыл бұрын
Todd Boden what's her name??
@RodrigoBorgia12 жыл бұрын
Really I NEED that advice! My 12 month daughter looks like 17 month and I just want my cute little baby back, not that older getting freak.
@alexhodgson72543 жыл бұрын
loool jim is so good the way he said “what do you do when you hit that moment of weakness” hahaha add tracys classic morning show agreement/empathy nod im ded 😂😂
@lifesnova13 жыл бұрын
This is the funniest video yet! I laughed so hard when she said she was consuming "post it notes" and "wash cloths"
@JohnSmith-ms4xd4 жыл бұрын
3:19 did the host actually say "cringe"
@lategamer66844 жыл бұрын
If you listen I think she might’ve said “great”
@jasonluong3862 Жыл бұрын
In case you are wondering, the actress playing the author had a medical condition that caused her to be emaciated.
@mutedonkey8361 Жыл бұрын
I believe her condition was called finger down throat syndrome
@vhsjpdfg6 жыл бұрын
Really dark, really well done.
@MWorsa Жыл бұрын
An ounce of rubber is more fattening than an ounce of plastic.
@johnnysilverhand6045 Жыл бұрын
“I know I’m still fat but I’m getting there”
@AidanofVT3 жыл бұрын
This is the strongest Adult-Swim-uncomfortable vibe I've gotten from an ONN video.
@confusedsteak45704 жыл бұрын
Anyone who is able to consume an entire bowling ball deserves those 2,300 calories
@bobelliott57834 жыл бұрын
"Oh boy I am so happy" I was kinda expecting her to just threaten to kill herself on live television after that
@meowpizza24033 жыл бұрын
Her diet works wonders! I used to weigh 120lbs, now I weigh 30lbs. Hoping to hit 20lbs soon!
@SonglyWryt.Bon-Burr2 жыл бұрын
Used to go to school with a girl who had this condition. Her sister had it and it was when I saw their father that I understood it's genetics.
@pinglauwa14 жыл бұрын
"26 calories!" Lol
@0_dearghealach_0832 жыл бұрын
I really hope that lady is alright.
@ignis_infinitus_infernus Жыл бұрын
In 2017 she died by untreated idiopathic transverse myelitis, at age of death she weighed 86lb's.
@0_dearghealach_083 Жыл бұрын
@@ignis_infinitus_infernus Oh dear. May she rest in peace.
@anandmaha110 ай бұрын
@@ignis_infinitus_infernus lol what? as if you would know what her name is. making shit up like that isn't funny idiot
@LordMaliscence3 жыл бұрын
This is literally breatharianism
@TheChickenRiceBowl7 жыл бұрын
It's awesome that she has such a great sense of humor about it.
@breakfreak318111 ай бұрын
It's not even satire. There actually are people who have damaged their bodies because they thought that they could survive on minimal food, fresh air and sunlight (Breatharians - seriously!) A guy in Russia recently went to jail for murder because he convinced his girlfriend that their child could survive on no food. Sadly the child died.