Dissociative Identity Disorder// Ashlie- How I found out I have D.I.D.

[@Storm-hawke]

I wish you the best on your journey!

[@lilme7052]

You're so young looking!!! I thought you were about 16!!! I need to know your beauty secrets!! Good luck on your journey xx

[@ashliehere1020]

Awe your way too sweet!!! Honestly don’t have any beauty secrets or skin care routines. But I always use lotion before makeup if that helps 💕💕

[@lilme7052]

@@ashliehere1020 Interesting one!

[@blobs5432]

Love this, welcome to the community! Xx vlogs are a great way for communication, we are very new in our journey too, im just learning the terms like blended and stuff, Thats so relatable, our discovery started as a joke too, like omg its like i have 'multiple personalities ' lolol then was like oh wait ... Thank you so much for sharing this xxx All our love Fern and the others

[@ashliehere1020]

Thank you love!! You’re welcome! Thank you for helping me decide to just do it! You guys are amazing! XXXX -Ashlie💕

[@heathercarpenter6800]

It's hard finding others to talk to! It's only been a couple months since I found out I have DID. A lot of times I feel completely alone and the system is all I have. We are still working to coexist and so many times I just wish there was someone I could reach out and talk to. Your not alone!

[@ashliehere1020]

We are here if you ever need to talk! I wish it wasn’t such a lonely disorder and such a confusing one at that. Glad to have you here on our channel! 💚-Alexis

[@YourRoyalMajesty.]

It’s been months, I hope you’re all doing well 💞

[@ashliehere1020]

We are doing good! Thank you! We will be doing a life update as soon as we can. We have made a few changes! 💕

[@mirandagarcia9334]

Thank you for sharing, it’s stories like these that help people like us feel less alone. I related to so much of your story, I would find myself outside only at night without any recollection of how I got there. It was scary, and it’s still frustrating from time to time. I hope you’re journey has progressed for the better, communication takes trust and time, but even just the effort can make a difference sometimes. Hope you have great rest of your day~ great video

[@ashliehere1020]

I’m glad we could make you feel less alone!! Always here for ya

[@lonelybirdsings5875]

Good luck on your journey, it can only be up from here 🥰❤

[@cassandra1032]

Thank you for sharing, happy KZbin suggested you, I’m subbed💛

[@ashliehere1020]

Yay! Welcome I’m glad you found us! 💕

[@goopydoopyart]

It was really good to hear your story

[@ashliehere1020]

Thank you💕

[@retropockystick]

I am in no way a therapist or a doctor, but I am in the same position you are in currently... I feel extremely in the dark, I personally have no direct communication with my parts- but one way that has helped them communicate with me (one way street, unfortunately) has been to name my "other personalities"... So when my partner tells me they think I'm acting different, they pointed it out, and over a bit of time we decided that some of those personalities were different enough to give them names- I named them and they have taken those names... In my experience, the body has Aphantasia- We cannot visualize in our minds eye, and therefor we cannot create a proper inner world to communicate in. Giving them names, and a purpose, has brought out at least one- but potentially three of my parts so far... I wish you luck

[@ashliehere1020]

Thank you! We wish you the best as well! All Our love!

[@larazen3720]

I love you Ashlie! You are amazing and I think vlogs will be super helpful to you and others! 🖤

[@ashliehere1020]

Thank you love!! Especially for all your love and support throughout our lives! You are truly the best friend anyone could ask for! Love you lady! 😘😘😘

[@anjachan]

DID is so interesting to me. Wish you all the best!

[@papadong8100]

I have huge lapses in memory, I just remember 5th grade like one day I just became aware in 5th grade. Then I have huge lapses in high school too, one of my friends says she remembers in high school I was walking around in a haze and didn't talk just wanted to work. Atm I am in a gray out, I can't access anything in my head, I am so overwhelmed and I am trying not to worry about it, but it's hard when everything feels alien to me, but yet I know what to do? Idk it's odd feeling.

[@ashliehere1020]

We have a lot of time missing from our childhood as well but random bits and pieces will pop up from time to time. If your brain isn’t feeling safe or in a safe place atm they may not want you to access your memories. There are a lot of disorders with a lot of the same symptoms especially when there is a history of childhood trauma or any of trauma for that matter. I would suggest and always suggest therapy first. But I know most people are not lucky enough to get access to therapy but maybe you could check and see if your local area has any community centers that offer these kinds of things at sliding scales or discounted. That way you can start healing and learning why your brain is hiding information from you and possibly get a diagnosis. If not research helped us soooooo much. Just looking to disorders that felt like they fit. It’s so time consuming but so worth it when you find what clicks! Hope this helps at all! 💙-Alice

[@papadong8100]

@@ashliehere1020 thank you Alice! I appreciate you answering me and giving some shed of it being okay. I feel as if the people around me will not understand what I am going through. So it's probably why I am so distant, when I put my feelings into Google, the video from Multiplicityandme was recommended, have been going down this rabbit hole, I have an appointment with a therapist soon, so hopefully I can get some help or just finally have answers. Thank you so much for recognizing me, you have a wonderful day! ❤

[@ashliehere1020]

@@papadong8100 that’s such good news! Therapy is seriously the best key to help. Other people sometimes have a really hard time even accepting the mental illness even exist so our disorder gets bagged on a lot so I understand how it can leave you feeling so terribly alone! Just remember you are not alone we are here and you are loved and so valid! Of course! That’s what we are here for! Hope you have a wonderful day as well! 🖤-Jane

[@gracelove2774]

Grateful for listening to this vlog

[@fienevandijk7224]

Do you think that 'before' most of the time you were out, or that you had amnesia of the amnesia or something like that? I just think it's so crazy how you can be in a relationship with someone for 12 years and not notice... (please don't read this with a sceptical/ironic tone, I tried writing it differently but I just can't make it read genuinely curious)

[@ashliehere1020]

So he IS the one who noticed. I always knew I had sometime loss but I didn’t want other people to know because back then I was also an alcoholic and I wanted people to think I was ok and not blacking out all the time. But come to find out that I still black out even when I am not drinking and I used to make excuses for it. Or pretend I knew what people were talking about when in all reality I had no clue. I do think that I still have Amnesia of my amnesia. But times like that are really hard to know about, because you can’t tell unless somebody’s askes you if you remember something and you look back and have no memory of that. That’s how I can tell I had time loss sometimes cause it’s not all OBVIOUS to me cause I’m so accustomed to it and it’s just something my body is used to doing. That being said it’s still a hidden disorder and still tries to be completely covert even to me. This is probably super confusing and hard to understand. Maybe I’ll make a video on it from my perspective to “help”?

[@fienevandijk7224]

@@ashliehere1020 I think I understand but if you feel like there's more you want to explain or you want more of your audience to know, you could always make a video :)

[@Shadow-nlr]

How were you diagnosed so fast?

[@ashliehere1020]

Well i had already been in and out of mental health care, for years prior to this last "realization". So i did give them a run down of my past experiences in the mental health care, prior diagnosis and hospitalizations. Then we talked about what my husband brought up to me and then just went from there! We are currently not in therapy and working on our mental health at the moment. so we won't have any content coming out soon. But i do hope this helps and i wish you the best! All our love!

[@RondeWeijze]

Turn up the volume. I can hardly hear you.