Divorcing A Narcissist? This Is What You Need To Know

[@RebeccaZungEsq]

Do you want to know more about what to expect and how to protect yourself during and after the divorce? Join me in my free webinar where I offer tips and tricks. Reserve your seat here. icanslay.com

[@RebeccaZungEsq]

I'll see you all there!

[@bobrijs8329]

Yea butt your playing the game of the narcissist, if your advice is that everyone must cut all their feelings when they go to court. Hell no that's not gonna work for 95% of healthy parents, especially when recovery begins from the toxic relationship because it takes years and years and then still the emotional cues are coming up 5 or 10 times as high as the normal tension. When there was structural dissociation in the relationship that is pertinent. Then they have the choice ore react direct to discharge or dissociate again shit builds up and when they have a moment to speak everything will come out at once, and that is never gonna change. THAT IS WHAT YOU MUST ACCEPT AND WORK AROUND THAT POINT BECAUSE IT'S A PHYSICAL REACTION OF THE BODY THAT AGAIN IS EXPOSED TO DESTRUCTIVE BEHAVIOR Those judges have and are self-destructive because they can't tell the difference between the normal healthy authentic (feelings, emotions) behavior of an emotionally available parent and a self-destructive emotionally unavailable parent that cuts off all authentic (feelings, emotions) behavior like Jeffrey's Dahmer & Ted Bundy with there well developt Jekyll and Hyde splitting mechanism. This way we are building a Jeffrey's Dahmer & Ted Bundy or Dr Jekyll and Mr Hyde Society. Level 7 is vital will a child to have the freedom to develop freely in long term into a mature and emotionally healthy individual Level 7: High adaptive defenses: (Affiliation, Altruism, Anticipation, Humor, Self-assertion, Self-observation, Sublimation, Suppression) High adaptive defenses are the individual’s most adaptive ways of handling stressors and are often considered synonymous of positive coping. Internal or external stressors are fully perceived without distortion and the need to adapt to them is fully appropriated to oneself. The individual attempts to maximize the positive expression and gratification of his or her own motives, acknowledging limitations of the self and recurring to external sources of help when available.

[@audreykeepers-su8mj]

Rebecca. I JUST DIVORCED my narcissist ex. I SLAYED IT! Thanks for your excellent advice, faith and support through your you-tube videos. YOU MAKE A DIFFERENCE! ❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤

[@RebeccaZungEsq]

AWESOME! That's good to hear. Stay strong over there! 💪

[@hawaiigirl8089]

My ex narcissist lied 🤥 several times in court & the judge caught him too. He shouts at my Ex narc & TOLD HIM “sir you just lied 🤥 under oath” YET HE DIDNT GIVE A shiet . It’s such a life destroying system

[@firdaushaibatanmdiaz]

Did you ex narcissist, win in any park ?

[@hawaiigirl8089]

@@firdaushaibatanmdiaz what do you mean “win in any park?” Idk 🤷‍♀️ what you’re asking?

[@jacquiesegafredo]

I’m in the midst of a divorce and my soon to be ex narc is refusing to pay maintenance. The narc is trying to prove in court that I don’t deserve the maintenance. My attorney is trying to get my maintenance but I’m still struggling with thoughts of regret and letting the narc get into my head.

[@jasongrice5465]

Love protects and guards the vulnerabilities of the other. ❤

[@RebeccaZungEsq]

Definitely! 💯 What is something you're grateful for this week?

[@jasongrice5465]

@@RebeccaZungEsq God. 🌄

[@n2bluz]

I have two things I’d like to say here about this discussion based on experience. 1. If the narcissist tells lies to cause the other one trouble to have to answer in court, they should have to answer for it. They should also be required to pay the legal fees of the innocent one. The narcissist in my life continues to tell lies to anyone who will listen and has never been held accountable. Why would they stop if there isn’t a penalty? 2. When one of the married persons decides to divorce the other in a no fault situation, that should be considered in court when deciding who should get custody of the children. Mothers aren’t always the best parent and shouldn’t expect to get the kids and destroy the husband just because they’ve found someone else they’d rather be with. Often times made up scenarios are presented to the court to make the one being divorced look just as bad as possible with absolutely no truth to it at all. The system could use improvement in my opinion.

[@kimt8162]

The only problem with joint custody is the friends. I did not learn this until she (my daughter) got into about 10 years old. They have established their friends/their school rountine which usually began in the marital residence. In this case, the father lived in a totally different school system once he left. Keep the kids in the marital home with the primary custody going to Mom. Yes, visitation with Dad. That way their after school activities are the same, the Moms of the friends do not see interruption. Moms can be very protective and if they see the "Friend" having to take them somewhere else to visit your child; this won't jive. THey don't want a problem. They usually already know where you live and the MOMS talk. They just do. Joint will confuse things and turn some friends away because of the other Moms.

[@nsf555]

Really appreciate you. Thank you so much

[@RebeccaZungEsq]

Thank you Nadia. Glad I can help!

[@hawaiigirl8089]

Well it’s up to the judges to freaking ASK FOR MORE JUDGES & Maybe GO TO WORK MORE

[@hawaiigirl8089]

Yea and m On my 3rd LAWYER & no one gets this. My ex is on his own & winning - the Judges & laws FAVOR MEN IN CALIFORNIA

[@Chloe-licious]

Dealing with a narcissist husband might have to go to court with him and kind of nervous. Need strength cause am all alone and need your prayers 🙏

[@Ashley-Berk]

It's seriously broken

[@lincolnking9039]

I just want to say thank u Rebecca because u have made me see who they really are for 7 years I stuck up for them even when they lied and I know they did it got to the point where we would fight every day and I just gave up I got to the point i barely ate anything I was stressed I bottled everything up and I was just not my self and I took all my bottled up anger every thing they did to me and took it out on the people that loved me the most now that they have left mine and my mothers relationship has been better than ever I keep apologising to her because it wasn’t her fault I’m truly sorry I put her in that situation and I feel guilty every day most likely for the rest of my life I have this very heavy weight lifted off my shoulders so thank u your videos have really help me see who they really were

[@hawaiigirl8089]

Judges can be LAZY & FAIL TO READ THE HISTORY & then make judgement on who’s the best actor

[@scootypuffjr.]

Nothing new under the sun

[@hawaiigirl8089]

@@scootypuffjr. how does that help?

[@scootypuffjr.]

@hawaiigirl8089 It doesn't. It means that is how it always has been and always will be. The system is designed by lawyers, for lawyers, to extract the maximum amount of wealth from people going through the hardest time of their life.

[@derrickbarker6100]

Is there a way I can obtain paperwork for a proficient 23 year timeline condensed to applicable use for attorney?

[@derrickbarker6100]

❤

[@derrickbarker6100]

My interest is it keeps me in my lane and you dredge things I forgot

[@pamelawarner6896]

Legal profession are in denial about their abilities and do not rectify their mistakes

[@hawaiigirl8089]

You are right! My hot shot lawyer totally blew an easy Ex Parte two weeks ago. Silence of the lambs. Everything I asked him to do he REFUSED. Then stood there & allowed my ex to lie about me & I TOLD HIM HED DO IT. Our trial is in June - these lawyers have repeatedly subpoenaed my ex’s job the DFAS - NAVY WONT GIVE HIS PAY GRADE

[@jacquiesegafredo]

Dear Rebecca, if the Judge ruled in my favor in my divorce could he change his mind if the narc has damaging evidence against me? I’m so worried about it. He used my disability against me.

[@bethhinkle7087]

Thank you

[@sujiezhang9023]

Slay the Nar!!!

[@LOVEtoPLAYdrums]

"Judges are people too under those robs..." Former Creek County Judge Donald Thompson was sentenced to four years in jail for using a sex toy during trials. He was released two years early for good behavior. Thompson's been serving his sentence in far western Oklahoma, some 250 miles from his former courtroom.

[@lourdesmadrid1526]

What happens when you are not married but we are living together for last 7 years?

[@jackleprevost9021]

I've been in Family Court in both Maryland and Massachusetts's. Both are completely broken. This third Divorce for me; I'm not appearing anywhere. They simply don't care about being married to a Narcissist. I will say I had a Female Judge in Mass. and I had the case dismissed on complete lies by my ex. Document everything. Especially when it comes to money, child support; and especially any visitation issues. Fathers especially have no rights in this Kangaroo Court. I'd rather be in a cell next time...

[@charlenemyers188]

Dena Burney Raymour

[@maryvance2350]

I have to ask What about the men out their that are victims from wives being narcissistic and having all these things you’ve been informing about a narcissist spouse I’m helping my son for it seems his wife has made 180 degree turn and he has found out she has a friend that’s supplying her with gummies that she ended up confessing to him when he came home from work and she knows him being a police officer can’t have that for they got in arguments about it and they finished adoption last child out of 3 they adopted Long story But I’ve been through a marriage of 28 years of a narcissist spouse his dad and my son is seeing the true colors of his dad after I’ve divorced myself 8 years ago and now my son is going through a divorce from his wife that he seeing how narcissistic she is by my showing him your videos What is things you can advise him for he only has myself and his brother standing by him and yes he is getting council from his vet being in military as well and told his counselor everything and they say that she has this planned for a long time

[@laurajean8857]

They can lie through there teeth, and get away with it!

[@hawaiigirl8089]

And the judges can’t be that NAIEVE

[@maggietafila6398]

Shut them down!

[@RebeccaZungEsq]

Louder!

[@hawaiigirl8089]

We’re not stupid. Our attorney won’t care. They throw us under the bus for their own bad case timing in their schedules. I listened & my attorney FAILED TO LISTEN TO ME & RESPECT ME

[@hawaiigirl8089]

My ex stole my car- we went Ex Parte” my idiot lawyer never asked for Sanctions & he let my Ex husband BLATHER ON & On I’m paying my lawyer $450/hour while he refuses to clear up my ex husband’s lies

[@Jackgritty28]

Don't risk going to court,it takes money,do you have the time and resources to deal with it?🚩🆘❌✝️💲✔️❔

[@marialucas1810]

Shut them down

[@cindyjohnson4378]

Slay the comments

[@pipnipipa7627]

Narc Slayer I Saw It Cringing

[@hawaiigirl8089]

THE STATE AND JUDGES SHOULD GET OUT OF ANY MARRIAGES WE HAVE KICKED CHRISTIANS ASSES FOR INNOCENT THINGS LIKE SEPARATION OF CHURCH AND STATE. So stay out of the CHURCH

[@cindyjohnson4378]

Shut them down

[@RebeccaZungEsq]

Proud of you! You got this ❤