Do I Truly Feel Proud? - Getting Real About Disability Pride Month

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

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[@sunnylove1008]

Your kindness, sense of humor and generosity of spirit are accomplishment enough. You are so warm and soothing whenever I feel down or lonely. You really shine dear one. 💕✨

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

That's just about the best thing anyone could ever say to me! Thank you so very very much 🥰

[@flowersstorms8863]

Brilliant video, dear Finn! Yeah - it's a tough one isn't it?!? I've always felt am I disabled 'enough' to count myself as disabled, but I think that's my own internalised ableism from growing up in the society I did. I think Disabled Pride is extremely important to make us remember, at least for a while, that we're valid, our struggles are valid and that we aren't alone in having to deal with all this. Much love and big hugs as always xx

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

Thanks lovely. Yes it is tough and the internalised ableism takes forever to deal with. Very good point about Pride and feeling valid, Disabled Pride gives a sense of community belonging doesn't it? And with that comes empowerment, validity, and strength in numbers

[@flowersstorms8863]

@@FinnTheInfinncible 100% agree! Yes, having a wonderful community around us, with the validity that gives is really empowering! x

[@kaz555]

Hiya, am here from Beverley Butterfly's recommendation (I am subscribed to her channel). I don't think you give yourself enough credit. You explained things really well, better than I can. I have hidden disabilities which were diagnosed a number of years ago. I certainly cannot climb mountains or even run down the road without possibly spraining my ankle....yet again! Randomness is cool and who doesn't love a rant now and again 😀. X

[@BeverleyButterfly]

Also I hope you write about this journey one day too xx

[@oliverg6864]

Dang, it's enough to be proud of the fact that you got clean and sober, never mind that you also went to school and wrote a book! Being in recovery is something to be proud of!

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

Thank you so much my dear friend

[@amyayars-evans4666]

You should be proud of how you press on and on and on, against all odds. A Phenix rises and you sir, are cream of the crop! Love you so big!!

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

Love you so much you amazing soul!

[@BeverleyButterfly]

There are so many feelings wrapped up with disability and the word pride! I'm so glad you made this video all your thoughts I think too! Inspiration porn is everywhere or we are made out to be villains... very similar to the trans community I think if you see what I mean? But yeah it's so hard to feel pride when we did nothing to get it. I've added that book to my list too xx

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

I agree, this is very complicated isnt it? Being proud of being different, of being who we are is one thing, but being proud of being unwell, in pain, etc, thats such a hard thing to claim pride of, and we are already told far too often that we need to just "get on with it" let alone being told we now also need to be proud of it! Very loaded and complicated indeed! I hope you enjoy Devon's book, it opened my mind to a completely new way of seeing the world and of accepting my chronic illness!

[@mypathunfolding]

I'm so glad you exist, Finn!

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

Bless you, what a lovely thing to say!

[@jasonstucker2102]

I love the tee shirt Finn.

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

Thank you!

[@pequenogaio4771]

Thank you so much for this video❤️ It really made me think about my own ableism and my own strugles... You are such a positive influence in my life:) Much love

[@adamhilliar3446]

I damaged my spine 3 years ago, had surgery (that didn’t resolve the problems). Then I got a long term throat/respiratory problem that is still being investigated nearly 2 years later. At this moment I’m pretty much housebound, because of pain from walking and any new smell makes me cough uncontrollably. Yet I still have family ask me when I’m going back to work, when just a shower exhausts me! It’s tough

[@martinacassells2661]

Another inspiring video Finn xxx❤

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

Thanks so much my friend :)

[@Filthycoffin]

Antidepressants psych meds disabled me. I’m 4 years off now and still can’t think. You’re very strong and brave to identify as disabled. I’m sorry for what you went through. I think you’ll improve though because your just 1 yr off or so an antidepressant. Hugs ❤

[@natashamason3328]

Lots of love to you all xxx

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

And to you from us!

[@maverickspirit208]

I can't imagine what it is like to watch your life just slip by. Fending off severe debilitating depression must be a moment to moment battle.

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

Living with problematic mental health is not easy, but equally, I'm not watching my life slip by. I manage to live a good life and find plenty of joy despite my chronic illness and fluctuating mental health

[@josefinesvenson638]

Love that T-shirt!

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

Thank you!

[@kavitadeva]

First of all I love you, you have touched me years ago and I consider you my friend. I really love you Finn. I have not started this video but heard a little bit and I got to say I do not understand why anybody would use the word pride about being disabled. You know I have ME CFS very severely. When a person understands this disease it's important to remember that it can affect any system in the body. For me I got degenerative disc disease, that's freaky, because I always told myself I'll never get back problems. look I've done yoga 30 years, I'm a dancer No way. Well yes way. Then I got neuropathy. I got it so bad I couldn't walk that went away now I have it in my hands so severely that I have no way of explaining it. It's like wearing a glove of gritty sand and it's electrical and it burns it sucks. I got oral neuropathy so now I'm a fat toothless chick. The surgery to correct what the oral neuropathy did was a three and a half hour surgery because all the teeth had to be removed but they had to go into the gums and into the jaw. That was fun. All I know is I have a mobility scooter and I love it because I get to go around and it's pretty fast and it's fun. I have a service dog His name is Finn and he's my best friend. So I also want to add that I have mental problems I have COMPLEX PTSD, And I have treatment resistant severe chronic reoccurring clinical depression this last month I think I've called 988 that's the unaliving yourself line in the United States. I've called it so many times I can't even count. I don't feel hope. Why? there is no hope I mean I'm not going to all of a sudden get better unless God does a miracle. I'm 66 now and I have meltdowns because of that complex PTSD which is a son of a b**** to live with. All I'm trying to say is tell me what is the purpose of being proud that you're disabled or I should be proud that I'm disabled I hate being disabled. Look, It sucks. I feel if I had enough courage I would go get physician assisted dying. Why do I want to be like this? I don't get it. I'm going to have to watch this video and knowing my brilliant friend you're going to say a lot of cool things. But there's no pride that I understand about being disabled. for me I'm bummed about it and have been for years and years and years because it took away my life. Ok 🆗 yes you are talking about being proud of yourself that I understand You said I'm proud of getting sober I'm proud of being a trans man and I'm proud of being disabled and being myself that is very different sir than saying I'm proud I am disabled. Do you see what I mean? Yes I am proud to be me I've had to overcome a lot a lot and I'm still here and I'm still trying to get some victory over the hardest thing for me which is depression and mental pain. I rather have physical pain than mental pain that's the worst because that is when you feel truly that the feelings you're experiencing are real because they play right on your personality right on how you feel about yourself about life about everything. So thanks for a great video but I have to say I was right it's not about being proud of being disabled it's about being proud of who you are.

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

I love you too my dear friend. I love how sharing on here can make such a difference, because your comments, and seeing how much of an impact my videos have on you, means so very much to me. I agree re the Pride thing. I absolutely feel Pride in myself and all I've overcome, Pride in being different, in being me, even Pride in being a wheelchair user, but Pride at being unwell and in pain, now that is something I cannot stretch too! I think having collective Pride as a disabled community s a good thing, it unites us, gives us strength, solidarity and power and lets us all know that we have value and worth and are not alone, and that is the distinct difference I place on the term disability Pride for my own understanding. Perhaps that will be next years video from me! Sending a ton of love your way

[@miloraoof7654]

I have been writing my Thesis and as ai come to the end of my Masters I cane across research done on COVID in its current state and MECFS was mentioned as a condition assoiated .. I wondered what your thoughts are on this ?

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

There are lots of similarities which is very much helping to raise the profile, understanding, and research into ME which has been lacking for so long. Its good news to see

[@kimzachris5340]

I was thinking of disability pride, and relating it to lgbtq+ pride, in the way of ”the first pride was a riot”. Also, how one of the reasons for it is to put into people’s faces and awarenesses that we’re here and demand equal rights, humane treatment, the validity of us existing as we are. I also related it to some philosophical concepts (I can’t remember the exact terms, because: brainfog 😅), about the way that an identity paradigm sustains itself by ignoring, denying or undermining the existence or validity of the ”other”. Which is why, in the face of heteronormativity, it makes sense to have a ”special” event to help us exist and become just another part of humanity. Disability is faced with similar issues of erasure, contempt, misconstruction, othering and the attitude that the best solution would be for us to just no longer be disabled, however impossible, costly, demeaning and oppressive that actually is, and that if we’re not actively and constantly engaging in ”overcoming”, diminishing or limiting the impacts of our disability, we have somehow forfeited at least some of our right to consideration. So I’m not necessarily celebrating or experiencing emotional pride that I’m disabled, but I try to be fiercely loyal to my right to be so, to function as I actually do, to the needs I actually have, and to have my own goal not be recovery of ”normality” or ”normal function” but to strengthen my ability to live my life as it is.

[@PaulinaMeyer-yf1cm]

I'm in a very similar situation (although i had my first crash at 16, i've been able to muddle through until the age of 37 before i got a diagnose and a disability pass) and am so glad to hear your thoughts about it. Sod relevance! Existence is enough! My biggest problem at the moment is that i love laughing about myself, but with me being disabled, i would be making fun of disabled people and thats wrong, right? I want to call my disability pass "premium cripple ID" so bad... I'll have to do some more thinking to do on that front, but luckily, i have a lot of time to think on my hand now that i lie around most of my day.

[@Intentionally_jodie]

Think I’ll order this book c

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

Highly highly recommend!

[@sammorrisuk4584]

How long after phallo did you feel comfortable to sleep. I'm 11 days post op and scared of rolling onto my front while asleep and squashing it

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

Hi my friend. Congrats on your surgery! Post op sleeping is awful, I'm a side sleeper, and I found having to sleep on my back really difficult. It was about 8 weeks before I could comfortably roll over and not worry. In the end I found a body pillow, that I could use in various ways to cushion around me to help support me in various positions and I now suggest to people having surgery that they invest in one as they are so amazing! This is the one that I have amzn.to/3SH5Ebk

[@robinknight6025]

The auto is very low in this video

[@CoMorbiditty]

Those people that are galivanting around the country, raising money, doing a run, helping the homeless, starting their own charity, writing a novel, having kids that are doctors and lawyers etc etc.... it makes you exhausted just watching those people. But it also makes you (me) feel guilty Im not performing, and being of 'value' to society. I really dont want to be a burden on society (by not working). So certainly, there is a stigma on the "social performing" that a lot of people put their self worth in, PLUS there are AWARDS for people that do amazing things for the community. So it does really make you feel sucky. 🐑Its so true... dealing with your changing world with a disability, adapting to it, and trying to negotiate your relatively new and changing ME/CFS, POTS and the rest, so you can function optimally has to be insanely taxing. NOT only is your strength and resilience OUTSTANDING, in being an ex addict, and being trans, going through all the surgeries, you are also dealing with a debilitating chronic illness as well. BE PROUD and LOUD!!! LOL. ♿ Most people would NOT be able to handle even one of those!!! 💪💪💪 🏳‍⚧📢📣

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

Buddy, thank you so much for these lovely words, they mean the absolute world. We can be s hard on ourselves cant we?! I would never expect so much from someone else, but from myself, even when I know I've been through, and am still going through so much, I STILL feel bad about all the stuff Im not dong, its ridiculous! But you are right, we live in a society hat expects, demands so much from us and makes us feel so unworthy when we cant live up to the often very unrealistic expectations. We are enough, in fact we are more than enough! I value your wonderful soul and friendship so very much, its a gift to me!

[@CoMorbiditty]

@@FinnTheInfinncible ❣

[@rainbowtropolis]

Hello Finn! You look just fine ☺Honestly you're more well put together than I am right now! 🫠 Thank you for this video, lately people have been giving me grief again by saying "You remind me of those bearded ladies in the circus back in the day!" I've been called "It" lately again, and I can honestly say I've been so burned out on defending myself that I just stopped hanging out with people as much as I used to around where I live. I've been going through dentist visits, stress tests and heart issues lately, so right now it's basic self care whenever I'm not out at appointments so I can stave off any flare-ups of fibro or autoimmune issues. I've definitely run into people thinking that just because I'm younger than them and have no outward disabilities that I'm just fine and can do anything. I've finally practiced boundaries enough to tell them all that I'm not available at all unless I'm outside and they need to ask first if I'm up for helping before just dumping their "I need you to help me with____" requests. I have a few support groups, but still not comfortable going out in public with them because they're loud when they're out, and I want to/can pass as stealth now. I just want to be seen as "The weird quiet guy"! 😁👍 Huge subscriber hugs of support from Minnesota, stay cool and give Pip and Chris some love from me!

[@PaulinaMeyer-yf1cm]

I don't know anything about you and you shouldn't listen to strangers on the internet, but i think being the quiet weird guy is totally ok and other people are not entitled to your energy. Hiding is a valid strategy. It doesn't work for me anymore because i live in a tiny village and need to use an electric wheelchair which is quite obvious, but it helped me a lot to maintain relationships that where actually important to me when i could still walk around and work. Nowadays, i switched to being brutally open with anyone nosy asking why i am in a wheelchair despite being "too young" for it and i admit, i hide in my garden quite often instead of going out because it wears me out. All the best and lots of love from a middle aged old crone living with ME in mid-west germany!