Doctor Who Once Said

[@michaelfraser1073]

I love how most of these are just various jokes, and then occasionally there's one of the most emotionally devastating moments in TV history

[@GhostKingDeAngelo]

Just casually throwing some trauma into this…

[@Aurilaushe]

"Jelly baby, officer?" :) "JUST KILL ME!"

[@Tumbleflop]

BinaryBinaryBinaryBinaryBinary

[@willsisskind]

That's the show, right? Doctor Who! Jokes! Fun! EMOTIONAL DAMAGE

[@jrs4753]

You just summed up the average Doctor Who episode

[@yourunclebryn]

I love how this is basically equivalent to just watching an actual episode of doctor who

[@lozD83]

Preferable to what has been recently released

[@marvelforever5802]

Yes but it's way better 'cause I've already watched all these so from just one line it's like I've rewatched the entire episode.

[@commandershortsight]

@@lozD83new one was good at least

[@mireillesaliba7525]

Where's the title sequence?😅😅

[@moodymoosh]

Nah too short

[@chocolatedoughnut1305]

You have to appreciate that every time he regenerates they really treat it like he’s dying, they let the audience mourn with him and his companions and it’s really nice

[@gregx5096]

*SPOILERS* Which was what ruined the 3rd anniversary special, and possibly the entire series going forward, for me

[@Gloomdrake]

@@gregx5096okay

[@CryTwink]

Just for the Doctor to become Tennant for the 3rd time. Don’t get me wrong, I love Tennant… but man.

[@mcccccccful]

@@gregx5096pls explain? Why?

[@Andrew-kr3vd]

@@CryTwinkit’s just for some specials 😅 they’re fun, it’s fun when doctors reappear

[@nickthedreamer4434]

"We're not keeping the horse." "I let you keep Mickey!" is still one of my favorite interactions. 🤣🤣🤣

[@DCC1134]

Lol yes. That lives rent free in my head

[@barkerconce]

11: I think you'll find I'm universally recognized as a mature and responsible adult. [holds out psychic paper] Young Kazran: It's just a lot of wavy lines. 11: It's shorted out. Finally, a lie too big.

[@samwilde8311]

That might be my favorite line

[@pikachu2.096]

I HAVE BEEN LOOKING FOR THIS! love that scene

[@liamscienceguy8153]

The dichotomy between the absolutely raw line that is “has it calmed all the rage” *immediately* followed by “don’t be lasagna” is sending me

[@Voidi-Void]

I can hear ai mace windu losing his shit

[@petrie911]

"You might be *a* doctor, but I'm *the* Doctor. The definite article you might say." Tom Baker nailed it right out of the gate.

[@ScalyRaptor1944]

"RORY! SHE'S HAVING AN EMOTION!"

[@Pokemaniak180]

"I'm the clever one, you're the potato one"

[@Zer0LifeNegi]

I don't think there are a lot of more emotional moments in the entire series than those shared between Wilf and 10.

[@derangedberger]

Legit the best companion in the new series.

[@HawkTeevs]

Wilf’s emotion when he was saluting goodbye to the 10th Doctor shattered my heart to billions of tiny pieces 😭

[@stocktonjoans]

Clara: "Are you a man or a woman?" Missy: "I'm a villain" Clara: "What gender are you?" Missy: "Evil" Clara: "Yeah, but what's in your pants?" Missy: _"Doom!"_

[@dandywaysofliving]

This is my favorite type of meme. . "I am the oncoming storm" -but what's your gender? "Kindness" -but what's in your pants "An idiot"

[@PotterheadMando]

​@dandywaysofliving I feel it should be a bit more like this: "So, Doctor... What's in your pants?" "An idiot who travels through time and space, armed with only my Sonic Screwdriver, knowledge, and two hearts full of compassion and love for all of the universe. Also, maybe a couple packets of biscuits and a few canteens of water in the pockets, in case I get stranded somewhere without any sustenance for a while. Also... Am I rambling?" "A bit." "Oh. Sorry." "Also, who travels through time and space with only a screwdriver to defend themselves?!" "But it's sonic! (How many times do I have to tell people!)" "Fine, you only have a screwdriver, which is sonic! But how do you fit all that in your pants?! Wait! Never mind!! I DON'T even want to KNOW!!" "What?! Oh! The pockets are bigger on the inside, that's all." "Well, THAT'S a relief!"

[@Doctorsmg3]

@@dandywaysofliving 🤣

[@sumthingwikked4257]

​@@PotterheadMando "It's quite a strange game of gymnastics, from both physical and mental. The latter doesn't do it for me. Imagine falling in love and feeling... feelings... for like... *WOBBLES HIS HANDS ABOUT*... I need my mental energy to keep the universe right time and time again and my physicality... Well, an awful lot of running would give a lesser human the stamina needed. I prefer running." The Doctor on: Earth Affection and Sensuality.

[@EditedAF987]

Reminds me of this exchange from ‘Love and War’: BERNICE: So, do you have a girlfriend? DOCTOR: No. BERNICE: Boyfriend? DOCTOR: No. BERNICE: Model railway set? DOCTOR: Somewhere.

[@NovaOscura]

Love his face after River's "screamer" remark, so many different ways to read that expression; "Always manages to turn life-threatening danger into an innuendo...": "You walked right into that one!": or "She's hilarious. She must *Never* know!".

[@Delsin4077]

The fact that she said that in front of her parents makes it even funnier

[@BolasMinion]

I find it hilarious that it means that Eleven acts like an ADHD kid who doesn't even know what sex as, despite the fact that *at least* once, he and River canonically fucked.

[@PhoenixNiteheart]

This compilation really goes to show how childlike Matt's Doctor was. Also, idk why, but the 3rd Doctor's "how many beans make five" killed me 😂

[@Idran]

That's one of the things I loved about Matt: he could throw himself into that side of 11, but there were also moments where he could let it fall and you could _feel_ every century of his age just through body language alone. Like him saying goodbye to Amy in the Pandorica.

[@thefishwillbearmed7391]

That's why he's a great actor for the Doctor, he portrays old soul in a young body beautifully.

[@ThatRandomDude204]

When they're not trying to kill each other The Master and The Doctor are hilarious when they're both on screen

[@NiennaFan1]

I'm the 69th like ;)

[@sheersternfeld1914]

Also when they are

[@Marcelelias11]

12 and Missy are still one of my favorite couples in this show

[@binraccoonsam5192]

26:40 The thing that makes this bit even funnier is that it's the oldest Doctor there that is calling the youngest Doctor there 'granddad'

[@superbluhedgehog1]

My favorite: From "Time Crash" 5- "That's a paradox! Could blow a hole in the universe the size of..." (10 moves a monitor over) "...why, the exact size of...Belgium. That's a bit undramatic, really. Belgium?" 10- (offers his sonic) "Need this?" 5- "No thanks." 10- "Oh, that's right. You used to go mostly hands-free back in your day. It was like, 'Hey, I'm the Doctor! I can fix the universe using a kettle and some string. And look at me, I'm wearing a vegetable.'"

[@Emperorwolf999]

"bitchy trampoline" is such a good line

[@j3sSM4iN]

i fucking love when chris went 'what r u gonna do moisturise me?' ICONIC

[@the_bob_147]

I also love how rose asks her "what are you gonna do? Flap me to death?" And a full series later with the 10th doctor Cassandra comes back at Rose with the same remark "What am I gonna do? Flap you to death?"

[@StudioGhibliFan494]

Damn right that people should salute Donna Noble

[@BirdieNoodle]

damn straight

[@onyourleft4194]

@@BirdieNoodle nothing about doctor who is straight

[@StudioGhibliFan494]

@@onyourleft4194 & there's nothing wrong with that at all

[@sumthingwikked4257]

​@@onyourleft4194in fact, it's all wibbly wobbly.

[@persialionheart]

My favourite line to this day will always be Jackie's "Im gonna get killed by a Christmas tree!" 😂😂😂

[@heatherrockwell9012]

I've seen very little classic Doctor Who, and the "We happen to be on the island!/OH MY WORD" bit made me burst out laughing. Amazing video

[@guidomista1395]

i think about that moment every day of my life

[@edwardtye4119]

I agree, the rapid change in facial expression is almost as funny as the rest of the scene by itself

[@ginganinja0636]

13:19 Ladies and gentlemen and timelords. I present to you, the moment that made me love Doctor Who.

[@roughfoxy101]

Understandable

[@stm7810]

My gender is aparently timelord, cool.

[@WHUFCboy3456]

Yay! I'm a timelord!!!!

[@yaboi9183]

When I first saw the end of time I thought 10 saying to wilf “because that’s who you are” was an insult and even though I think he’s definitely mad at wilf he’s not insulting him he’s pretty much saying “you just had to be a good person and sacrifice yourself” behind that cover up of anger there’s a compliment there i also think he’s jealous in a way he’s mad at himself for having to talk himself into making that sacrifice when wilf just did it with no second thought

[@LegalVampire]

That scene with Wilf and the amazing pay off of the 'He will knock 4 times' motif... This is why Tennant will always be THE Doctor in my eyes and Russell T Davies will always be THE best writer involved in the show.

[@shortyshawty]

I didn’t love the very first 12 episode but Capaldi running around like a madman yelling at a dinosaur and calling it sexy kills me 😂

[@smilesinmay]

45 minutes until the first special... PERFECT TIMING

[@youknow227]

Nearly 15 minutes

[@jenniferdunstan5065]

Did you like it?

[@the.monologue]

@@jenniferdunstan5065 it was absolutely horrible.

[@withallduerespect3001]

My favorite is Missy going "we picked up your distress signal *wink*"

[@EGGPLAYUH420j9]

I love how it goes from a sad emotional moment to some funny asf out of context moment

[@turtleisaac]

The “since he was a little girl” from Missy just makes me hope that the Spy Master really was between Saxon and her

[@NiennaFan1]

Because he'd know that the Doctor was originally the little girl alien they experimented on? I like that!

[@sheersternfeld1914]

I prefer the trans headcanon. Would also explain why the Doctor doesn't tell people his original name.

[@jorgecarrilloestrada]

I always say "an apple a day keeps...nevermind" (5th doctor) the best part is that next year i'll be a doctor :)

[@SyntheticTorque]

congratulations!! good luck!

[@harrysgf_real]

Good luck, I'm applying for medicine atm :)

[@bethaniie_]

@@harrysgf_realbest of luck to you!!!

[@quantumblauthor7300]

You can't do worse than what's out here already

[@rudysmith1445]

For some reason I thought you meant like, a time lord doctor, and I was like, "oh, huh, didn't know they were a thing now, that's neat" XD

[@SHcMOOK]

the absolute betrayal I felt getting whiplashed from "Are u Ed Sheeran?" to "Raggedy man...goodbye"

[@danielhuneke5862]

"Do you know, in nine-hundred years I've never met anyone who wasn't important.

[@MindOfGenius]

I vaguely remember a line from the 9th Doctor. Someone (probably a Dalek?) says something like "YOU ARE STILL ALIVE" and the 9th Doctor says "Yeaaaaah...doesn't that just piss you off?"

[@wlfshadow4255]

Dalek: You have no weapons and no defences Doctor: Yeah and doesn’t that scare you to death

[@MindOfGenius]

@@wlfshadow4255 Something about the way he says "Yeah", so full of vitriol like its an insult.

[@SkydreamPony]

Favourite recent Doctor Who quote for me... Shaun Temple returns home, sees the madness in the Noble family kitchen "...something smells nice" "Tuna madras" *pause* "Meep meep"

[@GloomyFish]

ChaoticQueerDemon out here memorising entire episodes

[@RBuyse14]

That’s me 😂

[@DeepFreeze172]

8:03 Makes me realize The Doctor is kind of like a reverse Omni-man from Invincible. He sees how short human life is, but it makes it all the more significant because of that. Like sacrificing your life to save your dog, because you love them so much.

[@n_art_cissist]

I absolutely love when David uses his natural accent

[@FrostyTheNightmare]

“Rory she’s having an emotion!”

[@MisterBurgerBeachball]

2:36 I don't believe I've ever seen such a perfect and hilarious face shift.

[@monstrousmoss]

I appreciate the inclusion of classic who. my dad grew up on the 4th doctor and now we watch it together while eating dinner

[@HAXRLITSXY]

i love how the daleks just roast the cybermen, and then they destroy the cybermen.

[@ThatSneakman]

"I had a mate who had one of these, I think his was a bit bigger." I need to watch more 13 solely for Dan

[@DeepFreeze172]

The 9th doctors run has the best cute one-liners, the 10th doctors run has the best emotional moments, the 11ths run doctor has the best goofy interactions, and the 12th doctors run has Missy.

[@Wingtail_onpaws]

'Did you just say smt about mummy' had me rolling on the floor

[@LocalTorchwoodIntern]

13:55 once again super grateful to be featured and I almost forgot I submitted a quote until I saw it LMAO

[@soundgal_sine_qua_non]

To quote one of my favorite Doctor Who lines, "MODERN ART!"

[@hareecionelson5875]

"in 900 years of time and space I've never met anyone who wasn't important" is maximum golden retriever energy

[@languid-4535]

23:45 this cutoff is absolutely hilarious

[@iantosbf]

yeah that was youtube cutting out the copyright 😭

[@moocake057]

“I’m 31 I don’t have a Christmas list anymore.” “I-“

[@Derglesnaf]

“I’m an archeologist from the future. I dug you up!”

[@l4vierose]

Chaotic Queer Demon basically carrying 75 % of the quotes

[@laurenrogers]

I thought this was gonna be silly goofy why am I crying over Wilfred Mott in 2023

[@ILikedGooglePlus]

Come join me in crying over him in 2024

[@foxymanaic5934]

Yep, still crying here too. He was an absolute legend. One of the BEST companions in the show.

[@oscarramage95]

‘How did he get in? Intruda window??’ 😂

[@mehqahto-and-his-uncanny-u4695]

The rich guy in the in the bunker with the Darlene and rose made that joke ABOUT the doctor in a completely different room and WAY later in the series the doctor references the joke but to himself this time dispute being unable to hear the joke the first time so he either really liked the joke or he just re discovered the wheel in a hilarious spin

[@yourunclebryn]

8:25 I'm crying I'm not ready to see Wilf again :(((

[@sadeggman521]

The actors dead my man.

[@1928crows]

​@@sadeggman521Yeah but he still recorded for the 60th, so unless they cut stuff out, he's in the 60th specials

[@n30dark]

@@sadeggman521 He's in the next specials, mate. Recorded before he passed

[@yourunclebryn]

@@sadeggman521 i know, but just before he died Bernard Cribbins filmed some final scenes for the new episodes coming out soon

[@sthirteen]

oh man i hope he gets to appear on the next special

[@nataliecameron]

This video is great and full of funny quips and then a wilf scene plays and I start crying

[@melaniebai]

Wilfred getting stuck always hits 😢

[@aliin8763]

40 minutes oh we eating GOOD tonight

[@sidestep5435]

The doctor being banksy and the creator of Yorkshire pudding is great

[@hanhanthegreat]

To this day I swear I can hear that conversation between Donna and Ten word for word

[@quantumblauthor7300]

Which conversation?

[@tennohack6704]

5:42 It's my honest opinion that River Song is the most well written character in the history of fiction. And this is the best thing that ever came out of her god damned mouth.

[@MoonlitRose101]

A true queen

[@m1nt8168]

Right after I watched that scene just now, I walked into my brothers room and said that entire line and he IMMEDIATELY knew the reference

[@kingonkingst.1361]

2:43 Patrick's face is priceless. I giggle every time I see that clip.

[@cptbuuya]

litrally can't

[@Gzeebo]

Paul Jerricho as the Castellan: "No, not the mind probe." Philip Latham as Borusa: "Excuse me. Look, I'm sorry Peter but is he going to say it like that?" (Director) Peter Moffatt: "Everyone, just keep going. They're turning the lights off in 5 minutes."

[@268mystic]

😂

[@LowCountryMatt]

Thats it. Thats classic Who in a nutshell

[@1tyrus]

it's criminal this doesn't include "What, you think you're just gonna come back to life?!" "When don't I?"

[@Houtblokje]

Good video, but i am pretty sure i am missing "There are soldiers all over my house, and i'm in my pants."

[@The-Busy-Beeeee]

“I’ve waited my whole life to say that and I missed it by…being someone else” -Amy

[@AUBREY-ml4ex]

ChaoticQueerDemon really likes Doctor Who huh?

[@RBuyse14]

That was me 😂

[@justsomejerseydevilwithint4606]

About the scene with Wilfred; He was given an ultimatum his heart could not withstand; Go on and live your life, or save one innocent life. He chose to save the innocent life.

[@shortyshawty]

9 just saying NO to the Daleks is such a sick moment, ahhh I gotta rewatch season 1

[@8-bitblitz9518]

27:19 funny how grandad is technically the youngest of the three

[@TerraShiro7]

When he says, "I don't want to go!" It breaks my heart every time.

[@Maxwithablahaj]

‘Time lady… some of us can afford the upgrade’ (best quote)

[@TessLovesYellowAndRavenclaw126]

I love how the 11th doctor said he never found someone unimportant but when he first met donna he literally said to her face your not important.

[@meniakeskesiadou]

But later on he always reminded her that she's important ☺️

[@Adamax93]

I love Matt Smith’s doctor for “in 900 years I’ve never met anyone who wasn’t important before” he doesn’t get the love he deserves

[@lorddraonic]

Peter Capaldi's Doctor has some really damn good comedic lines

[@WHUFCboy3456]

0:38 Four minutes? That's ages. What if I get bored or need a television, a couple of books, anyone for chess? Bring me knitting

[@marci1380]

Some might say that's far too lo- I'll see myself out

[@WHUFCboy3456]

​​@@marci1380 bye-bye

[@MrTheDvok]

"Ooh Doctor, you soniced her" Moffat what the hell where you thinking?

[@quantumblauthor7300]

Dugs

[@Canadia_Ball]

5:41 I was on my way to this gay Gypsy Bar Mitzvah for the disabled when I suddenly thought: gosh! The Third Reich's a bit rubbish. I think I'll kill the Fürher. Has got to be the hottest bars ever spat on Doctor Who!

[@Unknown-iv9kj]

I love the fact that this video wouldn’t exist if ‘ChaoticQueerDemon’ didn’t exist

[@yoursoulsaver3023]

23:46 is my favourite quote of doctor who "I-" always brings tears to my eyes

[@dsdots]

13:30 "What are you doin in my liver AGAIN" 😭😭😭

[@davidvoynov4582]

That implies that the Doctor has been inside someone's liver more than once and that there is a being that is big enough to house a person. Man this universe is funky.

[@kylebooface6359]

@@davidvoynov4582or perhaps there was a Dr. Who & The Magic Schoolbus crossover we just haven’t uncovered yet

[@quantumblauthor7300]

​@@davidvoynov4582Enter the Dalek

[@sheersternfeld1914]

​​@@kylebooface6359apparently, in the extended universe there is a Time Lady who is basically Miss Frizzel (is that how she's called?) !

[@christianlauritzen1445]

You flipping between comedy and really emotional moments is going to give me whiplash

[@BenLindsay3001]

I can’t wait to see Ncuti in one of these!

[@SuzieNerds]

Good news, he’s in this one!

[@quantumblauthor7300]

Sometimes it's like I can still hear his voice

[@goose_1578]

I would like to point out that missy kied about the number of snipers because she said three for each heart and two for the brainstem but timelords have three brainstem and two hearts, even when extending an olive branch she is lying

[@JosefinaQB]

“In 900 years of time and space I’ve never met anybody who wasn’t important before” I love this clips audio is going all over tik tok rn, it’s such an important line and so amazing

[@skyecloudclaws444]

Can't believe everyone missed "this one's a fightin' hand!!"

[@emmafountain2059]

8:03 is probably the best bit of TV writing I’ve ever seen. I cry every single goddamn time.

[@briimines101]

The fucking liver line just ended me once again. I seriously almost bit it choking on water. *Again.* 13:24

[@aidanhinds211]

You will forever be missed but will always be remembered Wilf😭😢😭😢😭😢

[@RealCoolstriker64]

8:10 I love this scene because it’s so obvious in hind-site. The “knock 4 times” part is such an excellent way to make The Master a red herring. But if you think about it, it was never gonna be him. This was always gonna happen, because The Doctor would never make any other choice.

[@onurozcan8661]

Whenever I watch the scene where that dalek throws shade to the cybermen, I feel like going dayum!

[@tristanwilliams4180]

i love how the 8th Doctor Still has his inner 4th Doctor When Giving the Officer a Jelly Baby

[@tristanlee8495]

26:10 My mate's wife unironically got pockets in her dress because of this scene.

[@quantumblauthor7300]

Probably also experience

[@mireillesaliba7525]

When 10 and Wilfred have a conversation it's always emotional😢

[@molly5jade290]

i can't believe i watched the whole thing 😭😭

[@SomeonesBestFriend11_SBF]

K9 calls the Tardis a stupid machine and from then on the two have a rivalry of some propertion maybe a little less then epic.

[@BarneySaysHi]

10 saying "I don't want to go" always makes me cry.

[@skykrasher4475]

“When I’m on a date. When that rare and special thing happens in my life. Do not. Under ANY circumstances, PUT THE POPE IN MY BEDROOM!” All time favorite Bill quote. I laughed so hard the first time I heard it.

[@LabraDoodleDraws]

The whiplash this video brings, like "aw that was funny!...OH MY GOSH DANG THATS FRICKING EMOTIONAL MY WORD"

[@justsomejerseydevilwithint4606]

30:38 Given the context of the Dalek Sewers, that might genuinely be a compliment from the daleks; While they have to rot away for eternity, Cybermen just Die.

[@thomasculham6127]

Love the dramatic readings by ChaoticQueerDemon.

[@amandacurtiss9864]

Lol Rory pulled out that your mom roast 4:45

[@fungallittlefreak1434]

8, 9 and 13 included? My hero oh my god

[@edwardtye4119]

The idea that Harriett Jones is known to all life in the universe will never not be funny to me Also, the "Face of Boe" scene with Capt Jack was a complete mindfuck for me when I first watched it

[@trinity_on_vr7079]

Donna: "Oi watch it space man" Doctor: "Oi watch it earth girl"