Don't let other people's unkindness dictate your lack of freedom

[@favouritemusic8959]

Thanks Emmy. This is for us gentle sensitive people who find it hard to be out there in the cut and thrust of the world. I have been bullied actually and in a hard way by family members. Family is not always the soft place of genuine love and care but a place where things can hurt the most. Thanks as always for your wisdom Emmy from Mary 💚

[@EmmyvanDeurzen]

Spot on.

[@connydm729]

I so agree with you Mary.....love ❤ Conny

[@Lyrielonwind]

My first bully was my own mother. It's so sad 😭

[@favouritemusic8959]

@@Lyrielonwind my heart goes out to you and l understand. My first real bully was my husband's mother (mil) terrible generational damage done by that person. I wish so much for healing for you and me.

[@trishbirchard1270]

You know, at the age of 74 I am dealing with these same issues and I wish you much love and approval !

[@evagrosz1621]

"Preffering human relations that are decent, carring and human" We must remind that also in the most difficult time. Thanks Dear Emmy !

[@MiauxCatterie]

thank you. coming out of years of ptsd isolation. slowly dipping my toes back out there. this helps.

[@julietteferrars3097]

💜

[@emilywilson7308]

It's astounding how many people are lonely. In the USA it is epidemic.

[@jusapoet72]

@Miaux Catterie ❤ Keep at it! Tiny sincere efforts are best. Be steadfast. Have faith in what is Higher. And don't be discouraged one bit if there are setbacks. The Whole Universe is backing you!

[@bcm7k206]

Thank you. I haven’t come across somebody like this at all. This is really helping me at 21. I am really taking in what you are saying. You are such a kind soul. I know you will reap good karma. Be well my friend.

[@EmmyvanDeurzen]

@@bcm7k206 Welcome here!

[@Krati.sharma]

I want to be like you when I grow up 😁 you have mentor energy, healer energy, sweet grandma energy and very positive vibes that help me little by little every day. Your words bring me comfort in my days of struggles. thank you 🌻

[@michaelbailot5479]

I sent this video to my 92 year old Mom who is suffering with a situation exactly like your theme. Thank you dear! I am 73 and trying my best to rise above the world’s present depravity and lack of love. Onward!

[@EmmyvanDeurzen]

Hope it helped your mom.

[@emilywilson7308]

Bless your heart!❤

[@susantelfer8576]

You are such a lovely lady, and your posts are so valuable and real. Thank you.

[@jusapoet72]

Emmy you are a True Light in this world. Thank you for your practical wisdom! You lead us back to natural knowing. You embolden us to keep going. You help us find clarity. You are the hope that we are working on being too on this planet. Thank you.

[@jameshopkins7507]

Your content is a real jewel. I am so glad I discovered your channel.

[@AndoStyle]

You're so cool! I've been thinking about this. Goes into judgement/expectations... mine are very negative, I'm trying to make more positive statements. It actually works. It's as if people see how negative I am and respond to that. The whole world changed when I stopped judgement. I finally understand. I'm hardest on myself.

[@EmmyvanDeurzen]

Great learning there!

[@irinavg4519]

thank you for this video. they are very therapeutic. I was struggling for years after traumatic experience being a foreigner in another country just because of a couple of rude people. I had to lock myself and barricade from the world around, as pain and fear stuck so my much in the bod. Your words, Emmy, are very powerful and reaching my on a deeper level. Thank you. ps Ik woon in Nederland ))

[@cristina14k]

❤ what a lovely message.. be courageous 🤠

[@lauracooskey9481]

I LOVE the warm sound of panting dog in the background!

[@hartlinerealm2015]

what a blessing to have you in my experience. Love never fails. YT is serving a higher purpose.

[@Lyrielonwind]

Finding allies is quite hard at least where I live. There's no sense of community.

[@emilywilson7308]

I think volunteering is a great way to meet people.

[@Lyrielonwind]

@@emilywilson7308 That's community. I live in a village at the coast and everything is tourist oriented.

[@vickilynn9514]

I absolutely love your videos, they are so heartwarming, wise and helpful. Thankyou ❤️

[@dale9724]

Your videos are a dream come true. Growing in my late 60s. You are so reasonable. Love it. Loved Frankel.

[@Technoxity]

Thank you. Its hard to find and meet other people even if you do try to go out of your way, especially for young adults. And everyone feels socially ostracized, its definitely not the same experience for everyone

[@Lyrielonwind]

It's much worse for old people but I agree since we have been kidnapped by our cell phones. It's hard to make connections when most people are watching their cell phones even when they are walking.

[@NeverBelieveALie]

Get a dog!

[@Angela-ul9si]

🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼😊🥰🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼. I will try thank you for your loving and caring words

[@MG________]

It is better that people should focus on what we have in common rather than trying to reduce everyone to some kind of real life cartoon/caricature of what people see them as and not even their whole authentic selves. They may not actually burn people at the stake anymore but just take a look at social media. There really isn't the need to when you can feel superior and make people's lives a living hell. Grandiosity is a self defeating mechanism. I think it goes hand in hand with projection... Plus: Other people's failure is not their success. They might consider being more proactive at something rather than anti-this person or that person. Oh and Emmy I actually thought you were in your 50s when I first saw a video of yours. Enjoy the sunshine today my friend!

[@lisamendoza-rodriguez1968]

Emmy, thank you Dear for this great wisdom. I was blessed to come across one of your videos. Since then I look forward to your content. Again, thank you for sharing you. Blessings to you and your husband.

[@jessicaschimmel7398]

How encouraging and kind you are, thank you for your messages.

[@mariellegrant6248]

Emmy, thank you so much! You make me beleive I can overcome bullying from some people, and turn my mind and actions towards respectful people, and towards my purpose!

[@EmmyvanDeurzen]

@@mariellegrant6248 oh yes, you can!

[@mariellegrant6248]

​@@EmmyvanDeurzen💐💐❤🙏🌹☀️

[@nooralkhafaji6038]

Much needed💝 hurtful people project what they lack onto you. Do not waste your energy or time arguing back. Respond with your success and Freedom

[@homtom2]

I don't know how, but every time you seem to upload the exact video I needed to see that day. Thank you

[@yiyiskblue8]

Wow! I am a new subscriber and so so glad I found your channel today. I needed to hear this today so badly. My own twin sister is so unkind and mean to myself and all of our other siblings including my parents. I was finding it almost impossible to deal with her. I will go forward now thinking about what you said because it makes so much sense. Since my Mom passed away last year who I am grieving on a daily basis my siblings have all turned into evil nasty people over the money my parents have left. I am trying to protect the money that my Father has left for himself as they all try to steal his last dime.

[@EmmyvanDeurzen]

@@yiyiskblue8 welcome.

[@bink865]

Oh I've had this problem lately. I am planning to relocate, but I must put up with this place for now.

[@sarahharas9114]

This is a very timely message. Thank you so much!

[@bashful3009]

New subscriber here after KZbin recommended a video of yours. It really feels like The Universe is sending me very loud and clear messages through your videos to help me get unstuck in life. I truly appreciate them even though I'm a little spooked by how spot-on your videos are to my own issues.

[@EmmyvanDeurzen]

@@bashful3009 You were clearly meant to find me.

[@RomyAnton]

I listened to this nearly 5 or 6 times to start my day. Greeting from Chicago, IL Emmy!

[@trishbirchard1270]

What a valuable conversation this is , from both you and Bruno, Many thanks, I love you. 💚💚💚💚💚💚💚

[@brendajcable]

Thank you for your generosity in sharing your help for others. I find lots of helpful advice from your videos. And am grateful that you share your point of view, as well as often the walks you take in nature with your dog. It's comforting to hear this wisdom.

[@ambiencelectronica]

Brilliant 🎉

[@piratessalyx7871]

I joined a close by 24 hour fitness and canceled the next day…filled with non smiling non social young and old people….how hard is it to have a conversation and a smile….no thanks! Rather dance and strength train by myself in nature….which does heal!

[@piratessalyx7871]

Emmy…neighbors dont even want to say Hi! What is that all about? I still smile and try!

[@EmmyvanDeurzen]

@@piratessalyx7871 people are afraid every where. Keep doing what you are doing.

[@EmmyvanDeurzen]

@@piratessalyx7871 many have forgotten.

[@NeverBelieveALie]

😭

[@Katarina-jj5rt]

Thank you a lot for your words and thinking 💗 It has been a very helpful reminder, a change of thought, and a support in a change of life conditions for myself.

[@EmmyvanDeurzen]

@@Katarina-jj5rt Good.

[@houriamohammed4538]

Thanks Emmy ❤

[@teresa6714]

I wish there was more of you in the world! Thank you Emmy!

[@zan1158]

Wise Words. Thank you for your logic & courage. The selfish insanity of the "woke" culture has sucker-punched me and I'm climbing out of it to find my footing.

[@EmmyvanDeurzen]

Don't forget that woke culture began as a desire to be awake to oppression and unfairness in society.

[@zan1158]

@@EmmyvanDeurzen Thank you for your response. That's true but I think they have now become the oppressors. This is what has shocked me. I have lost friends because I didn't believe what they believed and, instead of agreeing to disagree, they became nasty and name-calling.

[@EmmyvanDeurzen]

@@zan1158 There's too much of that around. We need to rebuild trust, decency and respect for each other.

[@zan1158]

@@EmmyvanDeurzenAgreed!

[@lenka7751]

Thank you very much for posting this video. I felt that it is the right message at the right moment. You really made me feel very secure. You made my day!!

[@pjulian777]

Emmy I watch a lot of KZbin and I have a decent level of education and I have only rarely found such clarity and good sense as you exhibit in your thought. It’s such a breath of fresh air… I wonder whether you might allow me to send you one of my books, kind of a moral tale for young people exhibiting the virtues of courage, decency and a life lived willingly for the benefit of other people rather than our own selfish ends. Thanks for your work, I have already referred some friends to your videos and I hope your work reaches the people who need it. Best.

[@EmmyvanDeurzen]

@@pjulian777 Get in touch via my website. Www.emmyvandeurzen.com

[@ANGELOFDARKification]

I genuinely wait to watch your videos daily 😂 thanks

[@EmmyvanDeurzen]

Glad you like them!

[@Tan613]

Thank you! ❤❤ i really needed this

[@murmulefy]

Much love!

[@ClancyKeegan-f4v]

Thank you 🎉🙏

[@giaximoi]

Thank you for making this video, I have read some of the unbelievably rude comments people have made to you, and its shocking. I am really glad you continue to make these videos, to share your expertise, for free, with the world. I am reading your book "Existential Counselling in Practice" and finding it really clear, helpful and useful, cross referencing with psychoanalytic and Gestalt theory. Thanks again Emmy

[@EmmyvanDeurzen]

@@giaximoi nice to hear you are reading my work. Have you read Rising from Existential Crisis?

[@giaximoi]

@@EmmyvanDeurzen I find your use of fantasy, daydreams and dream work so interesting, from an existential perspective, and the way you write about images, is so relevant for today in our social media age. The redirection of misused talents and understanding paradox. I haven't read 'rising from existential crisis' yet, but I am really interested in the idea of 'existential courage' and the hero, dare I say 'archetype'. I'd say Emmy, your hero archetype must be strong in you for everything you achieve, kind thanks again

[@kcarolinachristensen5471]

Just found your videos. Feeling inspired and grateful for your wisdom and kindness in sharing it with us. I lacked in people to share these thoughts and appreciate you doing this!

[@dancingsoulsister9053]

Thank you 💖

[@Nathaliann]

Perfect timing, muchas gracias

[@HuliXiao]

Thank you, Emmy. You're lovely.💖

[@jsuleman4595]

Thank you so much. ❤

[@corneliabugelnig5654]

Thank you again❤❤❤❤❤❤

[@Laurenski67]

That's the best analysis of 'woke' I've heard so far.

[@ronvancleef]

Courage! ❤

[@marylynch951]

Thank Emmy I needed this reminder God bless you always ❤❤

[@estheteLD]

Perfect timing on my end. Thank you beautiful friend 🙏✨

[@Dee-u8f]

Thank you Emmy - this video is so beautiful ❤

[@juliechurch1799]

Lov d video .totally relate .

[@1mt7xov]

Thanks Emmy

[@ravenraven966]

Oh yes.. so true

[@beingtallulah]

Hello Emmy ❤ I hope you see this. Your words help me tremendously. I would be filled with gratitude if you could have a talk with us about how crushing it feels when you try to save someone, either from an aggressor or from themselves. I have given everything in my being, to save my brothers when we were children, and more recently, the love of my life. Despite my greatest efforts, to love, care for, compile resources, listen, contact organisations, give so much of myself that I had to walk away…. The mentioned people are still living in awful conditions, external or psychological. How can I let go of this guilt and grief that I am ineffective, and that I struggle to feel I deserve to be happy because my courage could only save myself.

[@Liisa_011]

Codependency is a thing. Read Women who love too much. Or I'd alcoholism or addiction in your family go to Al-anon. Support groups also online for lovung self compassion for self. Meditation groups. Private counselling. Etc

[@rayettawagster9335]

Thank you

[@kathleenwharton2139]

Forgive and you will be Forgiven 😊❤

[@jimicunningable]

[@seulementlisa]

Thank You Emmy, have a good day !

[@EpistemicFomo]

Thank you so much! You mentioned bullying. Will you please let us know what you think about subtle undermining and mocking through sarcasm and then accusing the other person of being sensitive in (romantic) relationships? And your take on the ethical nature of sarcasm in general.

[@ravenraven966]

Good question

[@marylynch951]

I know exactly what you mean I was there not anymore Divorced him

[@EmmyvanDeurzen]

@@EpistemicFomo Bullying is one of my research areas and I will gladly do a clip about it soon. I did a song about it as it was a huge part of my early life. Look up my name and Bully.

[@EpistemicFomo]

@@EmmyvanDeurzen I will! You're phenomenal! I feel so blessed to be talking with you! Thanks again for all you do! 😊🙏

[@artpinsof5836]

❤❤🙏🙏

[@LargoWinch-th4gm]

❤

[@RaeKearns]

Fair point Missus, good way to say it……………..still think that if you are male, there is a ‘Presumption of Prejudice’ at the moment, anytime you open your mouth, words are filtered in a distorted manner and I’m a arty lefty liberal(other people’s label)…….often prefer to stay home and have a nice glass with my wife…..

[@EmmyvanDeurzen]

Understandable!

[@RaeKearns]

@@EmmyvanDeurzen My martyr complex or else I like good conservation...

[@jess-xb5sp]

Do you have a video on responding to rudeness and bullying? Mean comments and people freeze me, as they hit my ossified wordless Real Self inside me and my outer layer Self is rendered useless. I’m 61, visibly disabled from domestic violence, and I’m often a target of cruel comments. Ty

[@EmmyvanDeurzen]

kzbin.info/www/bejne/e3vZp5KHZ69rmpYsi=DeSkxQFLN_nLl0iN

[@EmmyvanDeurzen]

Listen to my song BULLY as well and read the lyrics. It might help you develop strength and determination. kzbin.info/www/bejne/fne6dWCee52YsKcsi=-MjAK0DX7QCr-hPu

[@jess-xb5sp]

@@EmmyvanDeurzen Thank you for both. I learn from your measured responses to comments too, you are one of my role models on my healing journey, with gratitude

[@EmmyvanDeurzen]

@@jess-xb5sp Measured is a good word for thoughtful and careful!

[@emilywilson7308]

I don't like how the word "woke" has become used too much. Now it's considered an insult. It makes no sense.

[@EmmyvanDeurzen]

@@emilywilson7308 no

[@dodafaitsoncinema]

yes we are in barbarism, lol, plus how to give respect to someone one dont know, respect is gained with time

[@carolynclitheroe3588]

Thanks for this. I think wokism can be used to signify people who grand stand by victimising people who don’t happen to know the most recent terminology or people who over idealise other groups. I think it’s an awful word though!

[@vitoriawermelinger9531]

🤎

[@anusha_d]

I wish I was your daughter ❤

[@dodafaitsoncinema]

barbarism more & more if u didnt notice yet! your advice date like from another century. we need something more radical.

[@EmmyvanDeurzen]

@@dodafaitsoncinema Radical means from the roots. That is what we need. We need to rediscover our roots. From there we can created the new in a better way.