Don’t Worry Be Happy | Chapo Trap House

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Episdoe 702 - Don’t Worry Be Happy (1/30/23)
/ chapo-trap-house
Art/Animation by Emily Halaka @emilyhalaka
A grab-bag of topics today: A novel idea for fixing policing from the Slow Boring blog; Eric Adams has a rat problem; Priest goes to hell; TikTok ban on the horizon; Prince Andrew in the tub; Andrew Tate’s jail posts.
#chapotraphouse #chapo

[@jordanforbes149]

I love how the solution to police brutality is always more cops

[@Some_Average_Joe]

This from the people who think the solution to capitalism deteriorating society is more capitalism. Doubling down is all they know.

[@ince55ant]

@@Some_Average_Joe but what if free-market policing?

[@Some_Average_Joe]

@@ince55ant I think there was a documentary about that, Robocop I believe?

[@ChewyThomson]

@@ince55ant what if policing but on the blockchain

[@technologic21]

It's called escalation. "We start wearing Kevlar, they buy armor piercing rounds." - Gordon, Batman Begins

[@TerrenceNowicki]

"Don't Worry, Be Happy" playing on a loop in Hell sounds like a Far Side cartoon.

[@daviddestin1990]

I have always said that the pigs act like an occupying army, but I suppose you could call them "gangs", to use their own nomenclature...

[@jaydinledford6990]

Blue gang, I call em

[@sandequation2653]

I would say they ARE a gang that ACTS like an occupying army. All these sheriff's departments assuming nation-wide support, even when they're just an isolated cadre of thugs.

[@Knight-Bishop]

Then you have ex-military who did civilian liasing overseas trying to join PD's and getting fired for actually trying to de-escalate. So they're actually *worse* than an occupying army.

[@technologic21]

A society that outsources/trades its freedom for security deserves neither.

[@ince55ant]

as someone who has lived during and post military occupation, the USA cops are something much worse. they're basically like Frank Kitson led paratroopers. or like those militias that get supported by intellegence services so they're supercharged with technology and intel

[@Mark-jr6ld]

They do things differently in Hell, they're a little bit twisted. It's like The Addams Family.

[@user-hy8uo5ig9o]

if you choose to run away with me, i will tickle you eternally, and i see nothing wrong with that.

[@thomasgiles2876]

I like the imagery God touchdown spiking priests into Hell, and Hell is ruled by the South Park Satan trying to welcome them with a musical number.

[@Mr.Redink]

The scorpion unit is a very ironic name when you consider the "scorpion and the frog" story and its implications

[@No.0.o.0]

Or the princess and the frog

[@ince55ant]

i dunno, i can imagine some cop hearing the fable and thinking "that scorpion is bad-ass. that woke frog was stupid. i am the scorpion in this story and it means i'm awesome"

[@Mr.Redink]

@@No.0.o.0 the princess and the frog that both resisted arrest so I set up a sting operation to blackmail them into mule-ing illegal substances to fund the sting operation and my wife's breast expansion surgery and my john deer lawnmower

[@joekuvorkian]

And when the world needed Christopher Dorner the most, he vanished

[@herpderp728]

The real Christopher Dorners were the ones in out hearts 💕

[@joekuvorkian]

@@herpderp728 maybe the real Christopher Dorners were the friends we made a long the way

[@kazumahazeuzumaki]

Can't corner the Dorner.

[@tomstock9678]

Never would’ve seen a red wall reference coming 10/10

[@OneSadSouljah]

Resurrecting Lord Infamous to deal with Memphis PD

[@theroyalcrane]

That's a revenge horror film I'd watch. Call it Scarecrow.

[@zhiguli8]

"Special victim creating units"

[@nicolev2028]

The Shield but exclusively with grad students. Felix you genius

[@nickadt]

Don't Worry Be Trappy.

[@bobbie3713]

Will is my favorite Chapo because he doesnt care to admit he likes things that are considered "lame" like Billy Joel, despite the fact that the Chapo fanbase is almost exclusively made of edgy 20 somethings

[@Black_pearl_adrift]

That police for America programme was immediately the stupidest thing I’ve ever heard.

[@Some_Average_Joe]

I dunno, I still think the couple with their own breeding program was dumber

[@Black_pearl_adrift]

@@Some_Average_Joe the longtermism guys? That’s just embarrassingly dorky imo

[@minamur]

matt yglesias should do something more useful with his time

[@jaydinledford6990]

Minor audio compilation error at 36 minutes

[@Mannydamon]

Probably took out the song for YT Copyright ©️ 😅 💀

[@Virtuoso191]

Waiting for your 🔌 @ 4am

[@Dawt_Calm]

Hey! I used to have Don't Worry Be Happy, UB40's Red Red Wine and Harry Belafonte's Jump In The Line on a mix tape I made from the radio, I'll have you know that I never heard any complaints when I put it on.

[@pietzsche]

Because those are all bangers

[@satellitesoundlab]

Hell yeah dogg blast that shit for Jim

[@the-craig]

Jump in The Line carrying a lot of weight here

[@marcuswalters8093]

Hang on, if it's a 17th C version, wouldn't it be, 'We *Did* Start the Fire?'

[@FirstnameLastname-kn5sw]

Buddy, it's been burning since the world's been turning

[@TheHouse-1600]

Dont worry be Chappy

[@thomasgiles2876]

Monkey paw finger curls Felix will now rediscover the Niel Blomkamp film Chappie and hold it up as a forgotten masterpiece

[@daviddestin1990]

I wonder if that clown has even read the Inferno. I was raised catholic, and like to reread passages whenever I feel downhearted and beatdown. The miser's fate is perhaps my favorite.

[@jaydinledford6990]

Doesn't he get molten gold poured down his esophagus? It's been a while. Which - by staind -- Is probably the music they play in hell

[@noidontlikeu]

@@jaydinledford6990 nah that's the song that plays in the part of purgatory where you just burn

[@minamur]

i didn't know the inferno was one of the books in the catholic bible, i thought it was just fiction.

[@garygrinkevich6971]

Another banger from the Catholic fallacy vault. Guilty hellbound priest gives elaborate hoax preaches piety, and then humble brags about his personal forgiveness quest, pass the tithe plate and play us out boy's. 💰

[@Tychoxi]

remember the liberal driller lol?

[@kfjw]

Why do all these religious types ignore *actual* demonic lyrics? Like, throw on some Mayhem, Mercyful Fate, Venom, or Bathory.

[@PoolNoodleGundam]

Actual satanists and satanic lyrics are painfully mundane (by virtue of actually existing), whereas the deranged psychosexual christian conception of these things is that of a supernatural, permanent force of pure literal evil. Because that doesn't fucking exist, they have to break out the yarn and start doing biblical numerology quack misinterpretations.

[@ince55ant]

because they dont care and are actually leeching fame like some kind of gaudy lich

[@sametimesfour8024]

One way to definitely get the hogs against you is to ban their precious TikTok.

[@supermarx]

Get armed. Get armed.

[@ellie3910]

Then what homie?

[@joshuamarx8209]

I'd say get organized and numerous first but okay dude.. France is making a mockery of us and they're just as inculcated to Capitalism as we are ... Those cops wouldn't have left that street alive in Paris, lol

[@subversivelysurreal3645]

🤣…if you apologize for using a word like mascara because you didn’t know that it had an alternative meaning, you need to…just join the dnc, because you’ll be running it in two years flat.

[@juliettedemaso7588]

If you’re censored for saying a word like “assault”, but as a massive global group collectively agree on a benign replacement word so you can continue to actually communicate .. that’s a bit less of the ol’ “har-har look at these dumb blue haired kids” though isn’t it.

[@subversivelysurreal3645]

I would ABSOLUTELY buy a cameo appearance from someone interesting in hell, but you just KNOW that they’re expensive and booked up forever …

[@hauntedoranges9026]

I would love we didn't start the fire for hell on earth. Banger idea as always will.

[@gloobark]

a can-of-beans futures 😂

[@Radiohead801]

Why’d the audio drop at 36:20? Felix?! 😂😂

[@Radiohead801]

It’s because they played Don’t Worry, Be Happy. Fear of copyright strike on KZbin.

[@JBlood-gf5pv]

There will be no peace until the Winklevoss twins can beat the shit out of someone for a broken tail light.

[@hohohaha999]

The 10 lb. phone is a reasonable idea but people would just design a 10 lb. phone holder, probably like a harmonica holder

[@aderynalbarelli5899]

Seems like a banger ad to have someone say "this song played while I was in hell" 😎 Might record some tracks, pipe them into coma patients' ears and hope they wake to tell the tale. Easy five subs

[@RIP_Greedo]

Picturing a unit of police for america grad students attempting to do a buy/bust.

[@subversivelysurreal3645]

Shouldn’t the mini mega church guy honestly relax, because didn’t Jesus take a three or so tour of hell, (or, idk, was he on a mission, and his dad sent him there to spy?)-anyways if it’s good enough for Jesus, why the hell isn’t it good enough for him. (Please disregard if I got my catechism wrong and/or simply bought something I heard about on cable television).

[@Kwalk1989]

You'd think they would play the whips and chains Rihanna song in hell

[@iwantsomecookies08]

yeah, but it had to be a song a middle-aged grifter would know; so, a hit from 15 years ago.

[@jonasuriel7936]

For the algorithm

[@tedav1953]

It would make a great sitcom though.

[@howilearned2stopworrying508]

Dr. Phil going off the air - too many TTI liability lawsuits?

[@ringo8410]

"Am I old? Is that why I find Tik Tok so uniquely disturbing?" Honestly, Will? Yeah. Before Tik Tok was the Boomer panic du jour, it was Facebook. Before that, Vine. Before that, Myspace. Before that, Napster. Before that, probably chat rooms. Same hysteria with a dose of anti-China sentiment added for flavor.

[@MOON-rw9ze]

Lol comparing tik tok to Napster

[@narcopsy]

Tiktok is uniquely crappy compared to your examples. Just ppl yelling 2inches from the camera in 10 second videos. It just sucks

[@FreakyFriday4Phaggs]

I *HardDick Heavy* agree: TikTok is Repugnant Disgusting display and schizophrenic infecting Ferber. BUT! On the principle of 1st amend, it isn't any different from Twitter. Same crowd of OnLineTard-idiots getting lost in the noise trying to 1 up another.

[@ringo8410]

@@narcopsy I'm sure it does. I don't think Tik Tok is 'good' necessarily, only that the push to ban it is dumb Boomer hysteria, and it's disappointing for the Chapo boys to fall victim to it.

[@HollowGolem]

@@ringo8410 They didn't, though...

[@justcommenting4981]

When are the Chapo POGS droppin?

[@Kkismet]

The giants are real guy probably didn't die, his obituary was posted on a user submitted obit page 2 hours after his alleged death, and the rest of his family's social media presence (outside of tik tok) didn't really deviate from business as usual posting at all

[@RM-sr5xd]

"Umbrella" plays in Hell for sure, "DWBH" is a great song and Avatar SUX!

[@deaddropholiday]

With respect to the whole Andrew story it's worth remembering that for centuries the death of a long-standing monarch resulted in an orgy of violence as various members of the ruling family staked a claim for succession. Not even women and children were spared in this race to take the crown. I find it fascinating that the incriminating photo of Andrew and VR had been circulating for a long time and yet the authorities only really got interested during the final years as the Queen's health began to fade. This question becomes even more intruiging when you consider the opinions of seasoned royal watchers who claim Andrew (reputedly the Queen's favourite) is in fact the son of Lord Porchester - once the Queen's paramour. They certainly look very similar. If this were true it would undoubtedly lead to complications with respect to the question of succession. It raises the mystery of precisely WHO snapped the photo of Andrew and VR? We weren't in the smartphone era so it had to be a standalone camera. But someone taking photographs - in what was an obvious blackmail operation run by Maxwell and company) with Andrew not just in shot with an underage girl but also Maxwell herself (a woman who knew the dangers of publicity)? It's just too ... suspicious. If Maxwell wasn't part of this operation I'd expect her (or her goon squad) to grab that camera, rough up the photographer and completely destroy any negatives. And yet she didn't. It'll be interesting to see how far this story is pushed after the King's coronation at which point any claims Andrew might be entertaining would be null and void. But if this were an attempt by rival factions within the royal family - it amply demonstrates how much of a long game they play when it comes to who assumes the throne. As the wise guys used to say, "It's just business. Aint nothing personal".

[@foehammer5047]

... who is the other faction? The line of succession doesn't even lead to Andrew. Who would be like "I need to move Andrew out of the way. He's my real barrier to power, not Charles, William or Harry." What nonsense.

[@deaddropholiday]

@@foehammer5047 That's right - factional infighting has never taken place within the royal family. I mean - Lord Mountbatten heading a potential coup overthrowing a standing British PM (ostensibly without the knowledge of the regent) .... preposterous. As for Andrew being snapped in the presence of not just an underage girl but an obvious agent for British intelligence running an even more OBVIOUS blackmail operation (bear in mind, Maxwell Snr worked for SOE and Maxwell Jr - Ghislaine's sister - headed a company which wrote critically important tracing software for the NSA and CIA as part of the War on Terror) - that's just co-incidence. (Bloody) factional infighting has been a staple of all royal families since the beginnings of recorded history. I can give you dozens of examples spread over thousands of years stretching all the way back to the Greeks, Romans, Egyptians etc. But YOU can somehow ignore all of this established history because you're so gullible to think we've all evolved to a higher plane of morality. Don't make me laugh! 🤣🤣🤣

[@Backinblackbunny009]

I'm intrigued. Where are you getting this stuff from?

[@JustinLivingstondesign]

All I wannabe is..

[@condor237]

A gay midget

[@quester09]

8 bn$ in pesos

[@qwert0]

happy

[@SmashTVBerlin]

Doris Gay

[@lil_rat_boy4472]

Giancarlo Granda

[@jasonwilson2377]

Do u guys ever consider there are a lot of shitty dangerous people out there n I hate the worst of police abuse let me see any of you guys putting your self in there shoes mind you I wouldn't do it either but it's not an easy problem to solve some people suck and are violent

[@jasonwilson2377]

And you can talk about systemic racism or poverty but at the end of the day there alot of dangerous people out there

[@FirstnameLastname-kn5sw]

Yeah and a lot of them become cops so they can do bad stuff and get away with it.

[@nerd2115]

@@jasonwilson2377 yea tese dangerous ppl you are talking about carry badges and guns. 🤡

[@guitarchim]

ACAB includes your family member

[@FreakyFriday4Phaggs]

If you're scared of knives, stay out of the Knife Drawer.

[@joshmccollen700]

The problem with Chapo's anticop hysteria is they don't realize that other people aren't like them. They don't have the same motivations and intentions and are not nearly as socially functional. While there's room for improvement in the ranks of law enforcement, tragedies like Tyre's death are the exception, not the rule.

[@Abyisto1]

PIG

[@malcolmseabrook8770]

Yeah, it's an exception that these dudes might actually get jail time. What level of brainworms do you need to post this

[@joshmccollen700]

@@malcolmseabrook8770 How do you mean?

[@malcolmseabrook8770]

@@joshmccollen700 your response to cops murdering people is to run defense for the cops. You're either a cop or unhinged.

[@joshmccollen700]

@@malcolmseabrook8770 That's what you read? Really? It's always other people with brainworms, isn't it? It's never you.

[@genxerfool9797]

I thought the man was Ash from alien.

[@bitteralmonds666]

qwibby will destroy people’s penchant for the short format video. That will cure the US of its on-line ailments 🧉🦄

[@henryglennon3864]

RIP Qwibby. You were too beautiful for this world, I guess?