Redirection goes terribly wrong. 🥹

[@Kat-Astrophe79]

Aw he gets me everytime he says "my little brother" 😢❤

[@AnneCaulder]

It’s heartbreaking. 🥺

[@KristiLyons-ib3jx]

I know...he must have always been looking after him. Get's the heartstrings every single time.

[@SharonBrown-yn6fz]

Yes it does me too. So sad to see him looking and looking. But he did settle down once he was told he was buried in Vancouver Canada. This disease is wicked. I wouldn’t wish it on anyone and it’s hard to take care of someone who has it, Kudos to this family who r taking care of ed.

[@robinettbanister1236]

I wonder each time his says my little brother, if in Ed's mind he sees them as little kids and young adults. He may not remember what a full life Bill lived. That he was an older man when he passed. If he saw the photos of Bill in his uniform, as an older man, pictures of the family all together at the funeral. Maybe he could refocus and find peace as Bill is resting in peace after living a beautiful life.

[@electronictrip]

i know! bless his heart!

[@lindathompson9334]

Ed seems to do better with the truth than redirection when it comes to Bill. He certainly loves all of his family.

[@ShannonGilpatrick]

I think he handles the truth better because deep down, he knows where his brother is.

[@JustAddy123]

oh grandpa that makes me so sad though how he loves and misses Bill❤

[@terri5757]

I agree. In this case when he can’t be redirected easily he should be told because it’s likely just below the surface his mind knows and it’s confusing and agitating to him. I feel in the case where he is just asking about Bill he should be redirected.

[@somewhereinsiberia-p7z]

Yeah... It looks like that.. Definitely😢

[@davechristian7543]

Bc you no him so well.

[@bettyboop4263]

This is so sad. Ed loved his little brother so much.

[@leevy6753]

You can tell he loves all his family deeply. He never wavers from that love no matter who is speaking about. He is a genuine loving person

[@sherrittaherring5790]

He loves his lil brother. ♥️♥️♥️♥️

[@SharonBrown-yn6fz]

Also he misses him. This is a hard disease to deal with. For the family and for the person who has it ……………. It’s for real in Ed’s mind

[@BsTheLadynred]

I thought his little jab at him was kind of funny about him never calling him.

[@gwendolynwilliams1117]

​@@leevy6753Yes he is God bless his heart. and the family.❤

[@Dirtman28]

You never stop grieving. No matter who it is.

[@justinwhite9045]

Isn’t that the truth!

[@life_withl]

Agreed

[@CarolynnMc01]

So true!

[@halakedida1944]

"My little brother"... So touching. He really loved his brother.

[@m.m.583]

Ed worrying that his little brother isn’t hurt 😞 Brotherly love never ends ♥️♥️

[@halakedida1944]

@@m.m.583 Yeah. Very caring.

[@ivyd5485]

Keep your chin up Dan. These moments are challenging.

[@drhyshek]

It’s ok Dan. You’re doing a great job! ❤

[@cbass2755]

“My little brother”…..your Dad loves so deeply…❤ For anyone to be loved like that…wow ❤❤❤

[@sheryljohnson7649]

How terrible to have to rehearse grief every day, hard for all of you.❤️

[@Hendopomeranianpuppy]

🫶🏻❤

[@Tomtaylor7337]

“ Grief is the price we pay for love.” Queen Elizabeth ll said this 25 years ago 😢 may she rest in peace 🪦

[@vikkivibes5257]

No matter how many times Mr. Salinger inquires about his beloved baby brother, it always breaks my heart when Dan has to not only tell him the truth (again) but watch the devastion wash over him yet again. 🥺 🧡🙏🏾

[@jAITtROtULL]

Yes, and just imagine how painful this is for Dan. I mean this is his father who took care of him, it must be so hard.

[@susanstancliff2937]

It’s so hard to know what to do. Thank you for trying so hard to help your dad. It’s not easy, I worked with a lot of people who had memory loss. It’s hard for them too because their memory is what makes them feel happy or sad at any given moment. I know it’s much harder when it’s your own dad. Prayers for you and your family. You’re doing the right thing although it’s not the easy choice to make.❤️🙏🕊️

[@kathywatson7822]

My mother in law will be 90 this month. She’s had dementia since 2017. During that time, she’s lost a husband, son and daughter in law. We just don’t have the heart to tell her, cause she would be so upset she wasn’t there. It’s so difficult when she asks about them.

[@carolmentz1781]

Dan you have the patience of a saint. Grandpa has alot of determination for sure

[@annaseger9124]

I commented on one of your last videos but I'm not sure you saw, one thing that can sometimes be useful in these situations when redirection doesn't work is showing him a printed out copy of the obituary for his brother. As sad as it is, sometimes that can help them understand their loved one has passed. Good luck, you're doing a great job! It's so hard.

[@7bikerboy7]

telling him the truth ends it pretty quick

[@jimbo1028]

He sure did love his little brother, this must be hard on both of you. Thanks for sharing Dan.

[@NeneLy-q9r]

This video really got me especially when he kept asking about his brother Bill. Dan, you are doing a fantastic job along with Danielle. Ed is lucky to be surrounded by such a caring and loving family.

[@astrofxastro4794]

He still remembers their childhood when he says my little brother its really sad

[@screeech1]

It's better to tell the truth rather than redirection, it avoids him continually searching for his brother.💔

[@cozy_king]

The question I would have Is why does ED keep remembering to ask about Bill,although he has memory loss he remembers to ask about Bill every 15 seconds,that’s an unusual thing about this memory loss.

[@screeech1]

@@cozy_king I guess it goes for the same as to him asking about his car keys, possible because Bill and him having his car was a significant part of his life.

[@Jenny-ls7hf]

@@cozy_kingbecause part of his mind is telling him “something bad happened” with Bill. Part of his mind knows what happened to Bill 15 years ago and how hard and sad it was. But it’s like only part of that memory is coming through, he’s getting just a vague feeling, and not the entire story.

[@dontcomply2war]

Pop's really loved his brother because he mentions him a few times❣️🫶

[@saraschneider6781]

Whichever decision you pick, it'll be wrong most if the time. That's just the way dementia is.

[@BsTheLadynred]

It seems Dad does better with the truth. He seems to handle the truth fine.

[@kylerwurzer]

Hi Dan, I would just tell the truth from now on to save your sanity. I’m not an expert in Alzheimer’s but I’d imagine the truth would outweigh the redirecting. It’s really a lose lose either way though. You tell the truth he still forgets you redirect he still forgets. Thanks for all you do man.

[@gregXxo]

I agree and although it does make him sad it seems to help settle him down

[@stang70man]

​@@gregXxo More often than not, redirection was much easier with my mother. Sometimes the truth would start her spiriling into full grief mode. Usually when she'd ask where dad was I'd just start with "Oh, he's downstairs in the shower" or "he's out tinkering in the garage" and she'd accept it, but other times redirection would backfire and would start her on the hunt for him and I'd have to break out the truth, which would either satisfy her, or start her on a totally different rampage. There's no way to know or guarantee the outcome to the worst of all guessing games. Hang in there, Dan! You're doing great!

[@gregXxo]

@@stang70man Each family, each person is different, everyone has to do what's best for them and their family... Glad to hear that redirection worked alot of the times with your mom

[@sheryldelind2628]

Redirection works better in some circumstances. But, overall it’s easier to just, as briefly as possible, tell the true story and move forward ~ it’s ultimately less painful. The anxiety of him thinking something could be wrong with him seems worse than hearing he died 15 years ago.

[@joannap.3473]

Truth! I’ve taken care of mines. Always asked where’s the loved ones that passed years before them.

[@sandraweening9229]

Ohh it breaks my heart to see Grandpa like this for his brother Bill😢. Glad that you and Danielle are so taking such good care of Grandpa❤

[@carlabryant1125]

That was really painful, Dan. I hate to see Dr. Ed in so much pain.

[@joanfreedomlife871]

At about 5 minutes he REALIZES it. Aww Ed. Dan you handled this perfect.

[@katerinakassi4464]

I am crying , seeing your dad,every day, reminds me of my mother,she had dementia,she was such a sweet lady 97 years old !!

[@1962Reba]

Bless his and Your Heart 💜 Alzheimer’s Sucks 😢

[@sabrinalavdisarnold825]

A tip from my caregiving days would be to start asking about his relationship with Bill, did they get a long, how many years apart, were you and Bill close? Let’s sit down and you can tell me more about you and Uncle Bill as boys…Those old memories are in there somewhere. It might be enough to calm him down and then redirect to a new activity when Ed is not so frantic.

[@63kasha]

Fabulous idea!!

[@marciamyers3388]

Breaks my heart everytime he says “my little brother”. God love him.

[@zaremaeubanks1557]

Mr. Ed is such good elder brother!!! When he says "my little brother", tears appear on my eyes. He misses his little brother so much and still worrying about him. 😢🙏🏻

[@susanlewis9351]

I could cry for him. God bless you and Danielle and Mark

[@rogerwilco4736]

He is so lucky to have such a wonderful family caring for him in his twilight years

[@amorose-w8c]

That makes me crying, I feel Him,his love is all we want, 😢He is a good brother , and a great father ever

[@reginaoguinn6699]

Aaww! Poor pops, I can only imagine how he feels being told his little brother died 15 years ago. My mom has dementia, and it’s getting worse. God bless my mom and Dr. Ed. 🙏🏽

[@carolyncahill9301]

Even with everything that he goes through you can only love Ed because he is the sweetest person with Alzheimer's I have ever seen. My mom was angry all the time and taking her clothes off the exact opposite of her personality.

[@gabiforstik921]

Wow, thanks for what you said about your mom. My mom does the same thing. She’s in a hospital bed all the time. I have to do everything for her, but she takes off her clothes during the night.

[@cynthiaparris7549]

My poor mom was the same way, always angry just mean. She wasn't that way before the Alzheimer's. It was very hard watching her decline. I feel for anyone taking care of someone with Alzheimer's. My prayers are with them 🙏 Bless you❤❤

[@robinettbanister1236]

A friend's grandfather had Alzheimers. He was a dairy man. They would find him wondering the pastures looking for the cows ... butt naked.

[@cynthiaparris7549]

@@robinettbanister1236 Bless him.

[@tiffanydavis9860]

I believe Grandpa has Dementia. Alzheimer’s is a bit different. I’ve experienced both in my family 😢

[@marybourque6686]

Please God, watch over this sweet confused gentleman, and watch over the whole family, what a terrible disease 😢

[@moniquemiles2578]

I been a care worker over 40 years in memory care it breaks your heart over and over 😢

[@coracee7653]

Thank you for being so understanding and patient. You are a wonderful son.

[@lorisheheen2198]

I remember when my Dad was looking for his brother who had passed ten year's prior. You do a great job Dan. It's not easy.🙏❤

[@judithknight4771]

God bless you for what you do

[@user-rl3qj7uu4r]

The video is uploaded 3 mins ago and it’s 6 mins long. No further comments your honor.

[@lisantica842]

One thing that brought my Aunt with Alzheimer's a lot of comfort was listening to music from her younger life, it always brought her joy.

[@sydneyevans2637]

That's a great suggestion! Music is one of those memories that people with dementia don't forget. A little dancing is good as long as people are steady on their feet.

[@jamesrockon9340]

My wife has dementia. She will spend HOURS listening, singing and dancing to her old favorite tunes. The radio/CD player is definetely in my redirection toolchest and I highly recommend anyone caring for someone with dementia to have music available at all times.

[@robinettbanister1236]

Music is so key to those with Alzheimers and dementia.

[@barbarabrandao815]

Dan, why are you yelling at him instead of talking to him kindly

[@barbarabrandao815]

Maybe it’s too much for you

[@LAURA-ll4ig]

I know it breaks your heart each time he looks for Bill because you know his heart is going to break all over again. 😢

[@everyonehasone7818]

I cared for my mother before she died at 99. The people she longed for came more frequently as the disease progressed. Reminding him you are in CA and Bill is all the way in Canada is not a lie, and easier than the grief, as the feeling of great loss never ends. He may progress to saying he was just with Bill, as Alzheimers patients usually "see" and visit with those whom they so desperately miss. I agree with the music and would add that rewatching upbeat old movies or shows, which they enjoyed in their younger days, can help. I mean, who wants to watch the news, what with all the depressing stories from every corner of the world? Alzheimers or not...

[@Kennacrow]

Ed loves to watch the news. He’s doesn’t enjoy listening to music. They’ve discussed this previously.

[@ariesfire2690]

Aww 😢 bless his heart. I've seen you try both ways with your dad and it's clear for time being telling him the truth helps Ed snap back quicker than just going along with him as if Bill's still alive. I think your way is best for your Dad. You know him better than any stranger on the internet idc what their profession or experience of others is or has been, you do what helps Ed the most. Of course it hurts but you are able to get him to understand and imo it's much better than him searching, worrying for hours about Bill. You are who he trusts most right now while he still knows you daily. Always trust yourself to do what's best for your dad as well. I lost my Dad a month ago today. 😢 He also suffered dementia. It was a learning experience for our family. Every day was a new day and we did what was best for Dad. No two patients are the same. Trial and error, one day at a time. Thank you again for sharing your Pop. You all have no idea how much he's helped me face my biggest fear in life, losing my Dad has been the worst thing I've ever been dealt in life. Your uploads have been a blessing for me and an escape from my reality. Grandpa brings such peace and joy to my day. Sometimes he even brings tears to my eyes. Never doubt how much you've helped by your decision to share your journey with your Dad. Who knew that a complete stranger could help someone hundreds of miles away just when they needed it most in life. Thank you so much....sending love from TN🧡

[@heatherscoggins395]

That “oh gosh” really got me! My dad had this horrible disease…we just love you Grandpa ❤

[@twix3799]

You are the best son a man could ever ask for. God bless you

[@JT1358]

Ed staring out through the door... he's in another world. My heart goes out to you all. He is moving further away. You, Danielle, and Mark are nothing short of saints in the way you handle him. ❤🇬🇧

[@Rlovencupcakes]

Damn that that was a bit sad. I bet it's very emotional for you dan..you are very strong and a good son to take care of your dad in this way..❤

[@gracemugo8292]

Oh, so sad. He loved his little brother Bill.

[@DebMcElroy-nu8nl]

I wish I could reach out and give him a hug. He is very lucky to have you and Danielle and the entire family.

[@franklewis414]

You are to be commended for taking good care of your dad with obvious love and respect .

[@berthagreen1620]

That’s so sad , he has to grieve all over. It’s such a hard thing when their minds start to go.

[@soozt828]

This is so sad...Poor Ed, he's clearly upset and very disorientated today...God bless him and you Dan.🙏 Sending love from Australia..❤

[@Fieldsherbert]

I always tell my mom that they're in heaven... Works for her like a charm... Can't be sure about your circumstances though.

[@Gumsvibe]

he doesn't believe in heaven he is not stupid

[@Fieldsherbert]

@@Gumsvibe very bad bet.

[@donnaj.1634]

@Fieldsherbert I think that is a very good suggestion ❤

[@BunnyRabit-yo3lx]

I wrote the same thing in another thread before I saw your comment. 😂👍 ❤

[@janepearson5802]

I did the same with my lovely mum .we are Christian family so it gave her alot of comfort.

[@nadahmad8346]

This video did make me emotional. God bless grandpa

[@susanmitchell7531]

My dad had Alzheimer’s. I’m so touched how you don’t get annoyed with him for asking the same questions over and over. When my dad was finally diagnosed, we listened to his stories over and over as if we’d never heard them before. We respected that he couldn’t help it - what good comes from getting angry? I pray my children treat me the same if/when I have that horrid disease. God bless your family, I know what you’re going through.

[@farmwife209]

Awww he misses him. Dan, I’m sorry, I know this isn’t easy for you.

[@e.kellyblevins8144]

Hearing “I love you” frequently helps in these situations ♥️

[@mddell58]

Thankfully, food seems to almost always re-direct. I know it's awful to keep going over and over that subject. Patience is a real gift. ❤

[@claudiapadrao2742]

So emotional seeing how sad he became after realizing his "little brother" is not anymore alive. Such an amazing work you are doing with your father, Dan Congratulations from Europe, Portugal.

[@JohnLawrence-wf1rj]

God bless you Dan for being so patient, it must be so frustrating. May Jesus bless you, your dad and all of your loved ones.

[@CatherineWallace-cb2oh]

What a wonderful family. I'm so glad you are together. Much love from Scotland 💜

[@helencalvin2455]

Bless You Dan, And grandpa Ed❤…

[@LadyBetsU]

Dan, you just do the best you can do. My mother kept wanting to go home and that’s where she was. One time she wouldn’t let her 6’+ grandson in the door. So he went around to the other entrance and she hugged and welcomed him in. We could not let her watch tv because if she heard about a robbery or murder, she thought it had happened to her. Sometimes it’s just one minute at a time. God bless.

[@djshad1885]

Im going through the same thing but with a violent and far more scary dangerous father than this. Forget what the so called experts tell you. Being honest...in a tactful but forceful way is the best way. Youre dad fortunately has the kind of temperament thats still somewhat manageable. Godspeed Dan and Danielle. Youre doing Gods work.

[@brandip77]

This is heartbreaking. You can see him get sad and start grieving. I feel for him, and for you.

[@Jessica-ml6td]

Some days are more difficult than others. You and Danielle know what is the best approach for Ed.

[@LiveItLikeLisa]

My dad is suffering with memory loss/confusion/dementia and I am always truthful with him when he asks where someone is whether they are dead or alive as I feel like I don’t want to confuse him more by twisting stories on different days as I never know what knowledge he’s retaining and what he forgets. It’s a daily struggle, I feel you ❤❤

[@michellecollins6379]

This is painful to see, but needed to watch at the same time.😥

[@vanessaburckhard3081]

Sad for Ed. Grief isn't easy. You never get over the loss. You are so good with Ed❤❤❤🙏🙏🙏😢.

[@gracedean2957]

Awww. Pop just miss his baby brother. ❤

[@brandi66RN]

I’m a nurse and you do a wonderful job of taking care of your father. You can redirect him until he gets frustrated or if you realize he’s going to be frustrated, then don’t reorient. Let him live in his own reality.

[@merialusher5890]

He broker my heart . Dan you doing such a great humble job.

[@janerainsford8996]

Breaks my heart. ❤️ he feels it’s his job to take care of his “little brother” I can’t imagine losing my big sister. We are getting old.

[@judgejenny2251]

Wow! He loves his little brother so very much!😢

[@Blessed_by_Yeshua]

I’ve been watching this recently with my mom who is in the same stage in Alzheimer’s as your dad. She loves your videos. She’s 86 and thinks your dad is handsome.

[@Ndbrow1]

Getting tougher. Pray for you and your family. Patience.

[@susanparker4550]

I truly wish they'd find a cure for dementia, then old people wouldn't have to go through all of this, Ed is a lovely old man & a very brave one. God Bless you all ❤ x

[@zuofayfang]

This is really so sad😢. It’s not easy to handle this but Dan did so great! 👍

[@truffles1111]

Thanks so much for sharing the hard days as well as the fun/good ones. It is encouraging for those walking through the same situation. ❤

[@tinamoessner7702]

You handled that so well, Dan. You tried to redirect as long as possible until you couldn't anymore. You can see in Pops eyes that he's searching his brain for that memory. My Dad will be 90 in 5 months and his health is failing and he's beginning to have some short-term memory loss. He is beside himself. I try to tell him to give himself a little grace...he has 89.5 years of info in his head and it's ok if he doesn't remember what he had for breakfast., etc. I watch you a lot...you're helping me in many ways. Thank you. ❤

[@Carolinex999]

Bless him, sometimes it's better to cruel with kindness. Your whole family is doing a stand up job

[@ReneeSamuels-j9u]

Dan and Danielle ...you a true inspiration...

[@katrinaquick4105]

O this is heartbreaking😢. You are so patient with him Dan. God Bless you both.

[@chandrikakalluraya8758]

His love for his brother is adorable ❤

[@natalieedwards_0415]

Happy Wednesday Dan . Horrible disease. Keep up the good work with your Dad. Be Blessed 🙏🏽❤️

[@barbaracholak5204]

I cannot imagine having to relive , grieve over & over again the loss of my loved one ~ I'm 75 years old .. I feel so blessed... I haven't been robbed of my past.. God bless you & your wife 🙏

[@LorieHolly]

True story sometimes redirection doesn't work. Unfortunately the good thing about it is, he'll forget again so to start over. I know it's a struggle a lot of the time. Thank God for your videos it will help a bit I pray 🙏 it helps to vent.

[@DAVEJJR]

Thank you so much for your videos! Your dad is the spitting image, not only in looks but personality of my father. I lost my beloved dad on 1/1/22, 5 months before his 92 birthday. Watching these videos has brought me tears, laughter and love…..

[@ozma639]

Dan, you are such a great role model for families dealing with a member with dementia. It's obviously very exhausting to repeat, repeat, repeat something over and over, and day after day. You have such a great love for your dad, and he for you. Dementia is so heartbreaking 💔. Your whole family handles it well. Danielle is great also, and I love that you don't put Andrew "on duty." Dan, I think you will look back on all this with great pride someday. You're a good son. And so is Mark.

[@diapricea4888]

A bit too stern

[@SherreaAddicks]

I just want to give him a gentle hug. It must be scary to not be able to remember

[@Twp205]

Bless his heart!🙏🏾💕

[@helenmeredith2002]

I feel so bad for him. So sad. You did good with him. You're a good son.

[@tammyedwards4635]

To have to grieve again and again is just too much!

[@castnm54]

I'm so glad that Dan finally settled down enough to let Bill's passing sink in to "Pop" .. it will happen 100 more times and Pop just needs that moment to let his brain catch up with all the extra extra words being thrown at him.. breaks my heart ..

[@jimmcbride4259]

Ed and your entire family has taught our family so much ! We to have just begun this journey with a dear friend and it’s devastating. “ May the wind always be at your back “ ☘️

[@ToddEWalnuts]

Much love and respect to you Dan. I’ve never had to go through this, but it can’t be easy. I can’t imagine reliving a loved one’s death over and over.

[@markeitawilliams5985]

I just love the way u try and protect him and make him understand

[@cprice4329]

❤Sending Love and Blessings to your precious family 🫂 Thank you.

[@DrStephanie73]

Clearly, on some level he was his younger brother’s protector. My older brother Don was always taught to watch out for me…and he did! God bless our older brothers…we are always on their minds!🔆

[@CatherineMartin-kz7cp]

Definitely, My older sister was & still is very protective of me. I'm now 55 & she's 65 😊 but I'm still a little girl in her eye's, which is lovely but sometimes annoying 😂

[@ML-lw2yi]

One of these days Ed will find his little brother. Bless his heart!

[@Gianna00100]

I think knowing the truth was much more settling for him. You can't keep having him look for him ❤❤

[@gregXxo]

I agree and although it does mak him sad it does seem to help calm him down