Eating Disorders in Ballet | Kathryn Morgan

Eating Disorders in Ballet | Kathryn Morgan
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Today's Thoughtful Thursday topic is a bit dark and controversial- eating disorders in the ballet world. Many dancers struggle with their weight, myself included, and sometimes that leads to disorder eating habits - anorexia, bulimia, compulsive eating, binging, or even obsessive dieting. I want to talk to you about that today and what you can do if you are struggling. #ThoughtfulThursday
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I am soloist with Miami City Ballet a former soloist with the New York City Ballet. When I was a young student, I was always looking for insights into the ballet world and how to improve my dancing as well as beauty and lifestyle tips. Now that I am a professional, it is my turn to share.
On my channel I make ballet, beauty, and lifestyle videos for everyone of all ages. My goal is help dancers improve and achieve their dreams as well as open up the ballet world to non dancers. You will see many different kinds of how-to videos here including makeup, hair, ballet workouts and exercises, Q and A sessions, lifestyle advice, and DIY on this channel. I hope you find all of my videos helpful!
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[@daffo595]

You're such a great figure to have in the ballet community, Katie. You mean a lot of a lot of us.

[@kathryn_morgan]

+Daph Duck Thank you so much.

[@schleichadventures172]

+Kathryn Morgan yeah you are!!!!! We have the same name:)❤️❤️ I wish one day I'll be like you!

[@TheALLYISLAME]

this is still true 5 years later

[@derekjuelz5973]

You prolly dont give a shit but does someone know of a tool to log back into an Instagram account..? I was stupid forgot the login password. I love any tips you can offer me

[@Sing_for_the_lord]

Seeing a teacher squeeze a tiny amount of fat on a girl's back and then saying "what is this?" "Have you been drinking milk?" Is just a glimpse of the body shaming going in the dance world.

[@princekrazie]

😳

[@sophiejaycolt4374]

that teacher is pinching skin!

[@skatergirl6764]

"Ballet may be your career but it is not everything...you have to think about the rest of your life too." THANK YOU SO MUCH for saying this. You are an incredible role model.

[@Ct27111]

I'm not a dancer, but I very much appreciated this video. As a recovering anorexic, I like how you refer to eating disorders as a spectrum, and how you consistently say they are a mental illnesses. Those are two things are very much overlooked or not well understood and hearing someone say it (especially to such a large audience) is very encouraging.

[@maureenseel118]

+Court__ Amen. I'm also recovering from anorexia (now weight-restored but far from recovered). It is frustrating for many people with mental illnesses that somehow it's not perceived to be a "real" disease because you basically don't see it (until the person is wasting away). And people being frustrated if you relapse or struggle...it is a disease, not a choice.

[@camillenaisbitt4035]

I hope you're doing well these days x

[@tiryaclearsong421]

On a different note, you can't always see an eating disorder. Just because someone is small or "stick thin" doesn't always mean they have disordered eating. The condescending comments directed toward smaller girls (oddly enough, even in dance) about how "anorexic" they must be would not be helpful if the girl was suffering from a disorder and these comments can really damage girls who are built very slender. There is no place for that kind of damaging talk. If you are really concerned someone may be suffering from disordered eating, approach them in a kind and non judgemental fashion. This is from my experience. As a teen I grew nine inches in high school and remained very skinny. (93-103lbs at 5'3") I danced competitively and the girls on my team bullied me about how little I was mercilessly. I ended up cutting and entertained suicidal thoughts until I gave up and quit dance. I had to rediscover dance (ballet specofically) at 22 and I still feel the environment can be toxic. In my case it was the very information we were given about eating disorders and prevention that other girls used to bully me.

[@kathryn_morgan]

+Annelise Koskiniemi SO true. Very well said

[@monicajayex9349]

Annelise Koskiniemi ii

[@miraclehearts2]

So true, my daughter dances ballet & is VERY thin in build. She has an underlying health condition- she was born with a congenital heart defect and had open heart surgery before age one, but she has remained small and very thin. (I think it's what her body knows it can handle.) She gets teased a lot and ppl whisper about it, but it's honestly just her build. Everyone is different and just because someone looks thin- It doesn't mean they have an eating disorder.

[@annielolwoman7879]

I’m so sorry to hear about that. They must of ben self-conscious about their own bodies, and thought picking on someone else would make them be more comfortable. Very unhealthy.

[@kamilareeder1493]

Oh God, yeah so eating disorders affect 1 in 4 dancers male/female. If that's the number one issue in the dance community than BULLYING needs to be the next conversation for sure 😭😪💀

[@CorinnePina]

Thank you for this. I was told at 14 that I was too fat to do pointe. I was 5’5” and 105 pounds. After that I fell into a whole anorexia episode for about 20 years and I’m still struggling. I came across the Vaganova and Bolshoi ballet weight charts and was shocked. I would be at least 10 pounds overweight. Ok, I’m 50 now and just came back to ballet after a 15-year break simply to enjoy it. I love your KZbin classes.

[@piggledinosaur]

I'm so lucky to dance in a studio with people who genuinely don't care about food or weight. We have talented dancers of every shape, and we all try to be supportive

[@kathryn_morgan]

+piggledinosaur That is AMAZING! Good for you.

[@pegasusdancing]

It is so true that dancers have to have the body of an athlete. We tell our students they have to have the mind of a scholar, the heart of an artist and the body of an athlete. If they aren't sure what that means, or how to get it, to come talk to us and let us help you get there.

[@allisonward958]

Leslie Johnson - I love that philosophy... and I'm not even a dancer!

[@viannydelgado2603]

Very true I don't do ballet but I do track it also applies to any other sport well said

[@user-ge6mw4rr7j]

I had to quit my professional ballet school due to an eating disorder, and I regret letting my teacher get to me so much that it caused me to develop one. Thank you for spreading this healthy and positive approach! I hope young girls and boys in ballet whoo see this will listen to you, and not follow the horrible path I chose. love you Kathryn @+

[@lilyerrington4556]

what were some comments that she made to u? (I'm writing a speech on this)

[@maureenseel118]

It means so much to me that you addressed this issue...thank you, Katie. For many, an eating disorder is about power. Feeling powerless over things in your life and then using the disorder to grasp for some sort of predictability and control. "I do X and Y happens." It is often a side-effect of depression, anxiety, OCD or other mental disorders as well. Thanks for bringing some light and information to this issue.

[@PthaloGreen2]

+Maureen Seel I agree. Great points.

[@katielarsen2630]

That's true, I realize now as an adult that I definitely had disordered eating and anxiety as a teenager/young adult and was in denial about it because I wasn't going to the extreme of anorexia or similar.

[@suzannefisher9848]

This is why it is of great importance for professional ballet academies to employ health care professionals to work with students to teach healthy eating as well as coping skills. Every ballet school should have a Registered Dietitian on consult who is well versed in sports nutrition as well as eating disorders. A Dietitian who has worked with dancers can identify issues that may arise and and develop healthy eating plans to support the extreme nature of daily training. Having a Psychologist on staff is a necessity especially in situations where students are away from home and may require additional support to deal with the pressure and stress of the ballet world.

[@kamilareeder1493]

It can be frustrating. Im a ballet dancer myself and I hold two AA degrees in sports science in addition to a BFA in ballet/modern (and my dance career lol). A lot of dancers/teachers are skeptical/VERY resistant to the science and proven exercises/fitness techniques. Without the seal of approval from directors, ballet masters, captains choreographers, and dance media, dancers won't do it. Tradition also plays a role. Ballet has a 400 year old legacy to contend with 🤷‍♂️☝️😭 a lot of people are afraid that if we make changes, it won't be ballet anymore 🩰 Im working with a ProAm ballroom dancer who has tendinitis in the hip. She could go to the gym 2x per week for 2 months and lift moderate weights, still dance, and make a full recovery. But she REFUSES to take my advice even though she paid me. 😮 She will only do dance/barre exercises and that will take twice as long to fix her injury 😭🤷‍♂️💀☝️ Theyre great, 😅❤ but not the most efficient use of her time and I see this everytime I work with dancers in a Healthcare setting tbh. The only time dancers listen to me is when they're injured 😮

[@k_a_y_l_e_e]

i was full-blown anorexic in college and it. was. hell. it really bothers me when girls say they "tried to be anorexic" because they have no idea how flip they sound. if they really knew what anorexia is like they would not joke about it. it's really fkn hard to deal with and it's really, really fkn hard to beat.

[@stillwatersfarm8499]

I don’t know about the girls you have talked to, but there was a point when I was so desperate I made a decision I was going “to be anorexic”. I was unable to induce anorexia cause my disordered eating was using food as an emotional crutch. While other kids my age were smoking or drinking, I saw those things as wrong and undesirable, but I drank soda and ate pizza instead. So when I tried to stop eating altogether, I didn’t last long without my coping mechanism. I think if you explored the world of girls who “try to be anorexic” you would find you have a lot more in common than you think, and they are probably still disordered.

[@andromedastudios5575]

I’ve had a eating disorder since I was twelve and I’m currently fifteen and as much as I love dance I have to admit ballet is a huge reason that my disorder is as extreme as it is

[@milliejay1451]

Was anyone else the last person to know that they were ill. My friends would question me and I'd say I was fine (I weighed 75 pounds when I was diagnosed) but I couldn't see it. Everyone else in my friendship group and family could see I was getting thinner but I couldn't. It was a real shock to me when I was told I honestly thought that they were going to tell me I collapsed out of an overdose on sugar because I'd had an apple that day.

[@Danie9121]

Musical star That sounds awful :( Hope you're doing better now, sending good energies your way!

[@jodawn]

Bethking149 although ive never had an eating disorder, ive heard lots of stories like this. many people who have a disorder think that they are healthy and fine. i hope you are better though!

[@NamaiWalterHeins-re4nu]

Yea, I saw a docu where they asked a girl to draw outlines on paper. And then she stood in front of it and they draw her real outline. Then she went in shock because she always thought she was fat... but really she was bone skinny 😲 I was amazed that people can talk themself so much into believing things that aren't true.

[@LenaLovingLotta]

thank you for making this video! I don't have an eating disorder, but I went through a very hard time of my life and I was very depressed. my body was changing in front of me and there was nothing that I could do. from 1 day to the other I was to weak to get out of the bed without help. I got out of this darkness, and now I'm on the way to be 100%healthy again. What helped me was the incredible support of my family and that I found the little nice things in life again. I discovered that I love baking cakes. I found a book series that I love. little things, that made life just a little better. And what helped me a lot to were katies videos. I had the feeling that I'm not alone. What I want to say with this is, when you're having a hard time, try new things, find just little things that can make you smile just for a few minutes. this is what brought the light back to my life and gave me hope again. and if you have a friend who is having a hard time, maybe bring them a book that you liked reading, or something like that. It are the little things that make the difference. you are not alone❤ there are people that love you❤ trust me, everything will be good again ❤

[@kathymyers7279]

Girl_with_the_red_lipstick wow. it's true. babysteps.

[@carolaguilar9136]

Pretty little things?

[@jamielaw4749]

When I was 11 or 12 years old I was constantly being told I was "too" skinny and I needed to eat more. "Eat a hamburger". I didn't understand why people thought that, because I was privileged enough to be able to eat nutritional food every meal until I was full. So one summer, I started counted my calories and stuffing myself with a lot of food, junk food, etc until I was way too full and eventually I did gain a few pounds and became the "normal" weight. I was only 3 pounds "underweight" before. What I wish I knew was that genetically, I'm a lean person and have a very high metabolism. I wish I also knew that my body frame made me look thinner than I actually was - some girls my age weighed less than me but didn't look it. I wish I also knew that I was only 12! I would gain enough weight as I get older... I am now 16 years old and considered a "regular" weight. What I've learned that there is no such thing as a "regular". A healthy weight to me would be unhealthy to someone else and vice versa.

[@sydneymitchell9607]

Me too!

[@sydneymitchell9607]

Not about the too much junk food but the peaple saying eat a hamburger stand stuff.

[@swordofswan]

I am going through that rn

[@smOVERCOMINGITALL]

I had a friend the exact same way. She was SUPER tall compared to everyone else in middle school so she simply looked thinner or "lighter" than she really was. She got bullied HARD CORE for being anorexic which never made sense... like if she WAS... why is bullying going to make her not be? but anyway i saw this girl eat a whole large pizza to herself, 6 tacos... this girl ATE. Still today she is still on the thinner side but she is a healthy weight and also just healthy in general. Some people are just genetically thin... some are not... everyone is so different and i never understood the idea that we need to judge people on their weight espeically when they are young! your body changes so much from even 18-21 just from getting older... telling girls at such young ages that they are this or that or you should do this... like idk. It makes me mad.

[@k_a_y_l_e_e]

also, anyone who thinks ballet dancers need to be stick thin and that muscles and muscle tone don't matter need to take a look at marianela nunez. she is by far the most athletic ballerina i've ever seen and she is by far and away one of the most graceful, beautiful dancers to watch.

[@juliana6632]

Oh god... You described me when you said "I started getting obsessed with it and realize that instead of losing weight, i was getting it"

[@anna.is.boring9810]

Wow your obsession with food when you were 15 describes exactly what I'm going through now. It's like an eating disorder but not really. Sometimes I wonder if I should get help or not because counting calories is what keeps me from binge eating.

[@PthaloGreen2]

+anna.is.boring It never hurts to at least look INTO getting help. Do you have someone you trust you can talk with? I suspect that as you're musing online about whether you ought to get help or not, getting some help would be a great idea. At least check it out. You can always go for help once and never go back if the help isn't helpful! Just don't suffer in silence or alone. I'm much older than you, but I was anorexic when I was your age (though not a serious dancer) and it caused me a lot of pain. Back in those days, not as much help was available for those with eating disorders, anxiety issues, depression, etc. and I sort of just had to muddle through life. Fortunately, I didn't die! In any event, a lot has been learned since I was your age back in the 1970's. My advice is to take advantage of that expertise. Suffering won't make you a better

[@katielarsen2630]

Yes you should at the very least see a dietician. I was like that as a young adult and I definitely had disordered eating and was in denial because I wasn't anorexic

[@abble7689]

If any of you have an eating disorder, you can find resources for help, emotional support, and possible places for treatment here: www.nationaleatingdisorders.org/find-help-support

[@michellegozdanker493]

You are so amazing! You're a huge role model of mine. I dance 3 times a week and I don't plan on being a ballerina however I still take it very seriously. Having a platform of support and advice is really great and it's something special that you're doing! Michelle xxx

[@kathryn_morgan]

+Michelle Gozdanker Aww thank you so much Michelle!

[@catherinecarterart]

Very sensitive and compassionate presentation, Katie, and sage advice. I'm sure this video has/will help many people who struggle with this issue.

[@kathryn_morgan]

+catherinecarterart Thank you!

[@behate1]

Hey kathy i would love you to do the difference between the terminology that have some resembles each other .. i.e releve & eleve , passe & retire , degage & jete , saut de chat & grand jete ... If you read this i love you and your videos ,, youre the best 😍

[@gabriellabale1128]

Could you make a video or if not do you have any tips on how to react or how to deal with teachers, piers or colleagues body shamming you and telling you what to eat? I am slowly recovering from my own eating disorder, but it's extremely hard when people are making comments on my body. Before I was an unhealthy weight and I have just moved into the average body weight for my height/ age!

[@hyvalla]

There are so many videos about eating disorders and big part of them is divided in two categories: ED sufferers and professionals about how to treat ED patients. I turn 29 in 3 weeks and I've suffered from anorexia almost half of my life. I tried to recover but never succeeded, until now. I went really fast in really bad condition and I was about to die multiorgan failure. I went to the day care center for few days to start eating, got discharged, threw my meal plan to garbage and started to follow MinnieMaud. I've always tried to recover by following my 2000 kcal meal plan, and it never worked, so I decided to try something else. Due to decade long anorexia, my body has suffered a lot, lots and lots of damages (severe osteoporosis, fractures in my vertebras and due to them I have kyphotic upper back; weak body because I get stress injuries very easily, and heart and liver don't work properly), so I need hella amount of calories to reverse the damages happened during my last bad relapse. And it worked! I'm now at my biological normal weight, much happier and stronger, and my dance is getting better and stronger! :) I go to psychotherapy twice a week, and my psychologist is probably the best I've ever worked with! So Katie, I loved this video! Your approach was like a fresh air. You know little bit about this issue but not too much, bc it could be really triggering. Your videos are always awesome and I look forward to watching the next one! Keep it up, Katie! :)

[@MsElizaRose]

I'm not even a ballet dancer but for some reason this video came up in my sidebar. I was anorexic as a teenager and just generally disordered for many years after that, and I think this video is beautiful. Your sincerity and caring shine through, and much of the advice is applicable to other young women with eating disorders. Well done and thank you.

[@perrylynnw]

thank you thank you THANK YOU for speaking on this issue!! I am currently in therapy, but its so great hearing successful, talented ballet dancers talk about such a huge issue!

[@kathryn_morgan]

+Perry Lynn Wright It's truly my pleasure.

[@zebra_nina]

This is amazing. It's great to have someone talk about something so serious the way you did in this video. (Like not being judgemental about it or pressuring the viewer who struggles from an eating disorder to "just eat")

[@kathryn_morgan]

+fandomyfangirl Thank you

[@PuddleAppreciation]

I just wrote an entire academic paper over this exact topic. I actually talked about you and the pressures to be thin even though you are ill and can't control it.

[@kimjongun9311]

I’m not anorexic, but I understand the mindset. How absurd and irrational our thoughts can be at times, yet we still believe it. I myself am social anxious/awkward, and I always form irrational thoughts. Like how everyone hates me (except for my parents) without actual proof.

[@bethanneblackclosetomyheart]

This is so helpful, Kathryn. Thank you for being honest, real, and a role model for us.

[@kathryn_morgan]

+Bethanne Black Thank you as always Bethanne.

[@nebulagems5191]

I started binging and purging when I first started dancing at the age of 17. I have now been battling bulimia for 22 years, it never goes away. I go through quieter periods perhaps 2-3 times a week or when really bad several times per day every day. I cannot say that it was caused just by dance, but performing does make you more concious of your body and you start to compare yourself to others. That can, for some people become a downward spiral and it is really difficult to stop once you've started. I have received some help but it's never worked. If it becomes really bad, then your body starts to really suffer, you become exhausted quickly which will impact on your dancing as you have no energy. If anyone reading this feels they may have an eating disorder or can identify with what I've said, please go to your doctor and get help! Don't let it continue like I have because it takes over your life.

[@sarahlowry9633]

Nothing is worth your health. What a beautiful gift you have and are able to do. You are a professional and you are encouraging others to be professional.

[@verucasalt5511]

Katie, you are a huge part of this community, not just for me, but for everybody. We love you! 💖👒👜

[@naomiratajek535]

Thanks for being the big sister we all need :)

[@dollybb4820]

Thank you so much for this. I have not been diagnosed with an eating disorder but am really struggling with eating properly and accepting my body at the moment, and have been for a while. I know it's so so unhealthy not to eat enough, but it's so difficult sometimes, especially when there's so much opportunity to compare yourself to others. Thank you again x

[@oliviacapasso2792]

Thank you so much for posting this. I recently got out of treatment for an eating disorder and realized that my dream of being in a ballet company can’t happen if I’m not healthy enough to stay alive. ❤️

[@DanceEdConnect]

man I appreciate this video so much. im a dance teacher and really try to promote a healthy body image to the kids. dance is a sport and dancers are athletes and its soooo important kids understand to focus on their health, ability to perform and staying injury free - not weight! love this

[@kuuttinen]

It is definitely possible to get better. I had anorexia, for years I trained 4-5 hours a day, lived on tea and diet yoghurt. .and I was really skinny, but after all that I got better in the end. My relationship with food will always be a bit different compared to people who never had an ED but I don't think about dieting&food every day anymore or feel bad about eating☺

[@kathryn_morgan]

+Kutteri Puup Good for you! That is great that you are doing so well. xo

[@kellym587]

I wish SO much that I would have been able to watch this video 10 years ago when I danced... You're the best.

[@emia8119]

Thank you Kathryn. People don't really ever acknowledge binge eating disorder and it's hard to deal with my illness when people don't believe that it IS a problem.

[@kathryn_morgan]

+Emily Arroyo Absolutely Emily. So true.

[@maggiep2319]

I’m a dancer and I’ve never had a full blown eating disorder. But I always felt like the odd one out. I’m the tallest in my class and the must muscular. All the other girls were so much smaller than me. There were days where I felt so guilty about my body that I just couldn’t eat. I loved the feeling of being hungry and I kept a journal of the amount of calories I ate in a day. Some days it was only 300 calories. I didn’t lose much weight, but I had to snap out of it and realize what I was doing to myself. I still have days where it’s just hard to eat, but I’ve never been full blown anorexic. I just want to say that eating disorders are one of the most deadly mental disorders out there. You can’t just magically tell someone to “start eating” when they are dealing with this. Encourage them to talk to their parents or a nutritionist. Your body is beautiful, and amazing. ❤️

[@ariadneschulz8822]

I have a serious eating disorder. I'm not a dancer and I couldn't tell you exactly what the hell I was thinking that made me do it. But I can tell you how I manage it. At my worst my hair was getting brittle, I was always freezing cold, my bones hurt, and I was having lapses in my memory. To me the most precious thing I have is my intelligence. So when I started to have cognitive issues I also started researching the neurological effects of starvation. It's pretty brutal. And that is when I started slowly reintroducing food into my life. I still was obsessive about it for some time but by working out and eating with friends I started to get better. If you're suffering from an eating disorder - whatever it may be - first get professional help. But what worked for me is finding out what I was losing by continuing on this destructive path. For dancers that will be your body destroying muscle and weakening your cortical bone. You kind of need those. Severe eating disorders will effect your concentration, your stamina, you will lose muscle, your bones will be at risk of fracture and your cartilage may start to thin. You may also lose your hair, bruise easily or find that the slightest touch breaks your skin. These will all negatively impact your ability to do things you love. If you're really concerned you can be on a calorie restricted diet that still gets you the proteins and - yes - fat that you need. When I say that I reintroduced food into my life I didn't go out and eat a pizza. I started super slow and careful in part to avoid "refeeding syndrome," and in part because I wanted to stay thin, I just wanted to be a healthy thin. Fish and vegetables are a great place to start, but talk to a nutritionist and take it slow.

[@bunheadladymelody3355]

This is very helpful. personally I just do whatever is best for my body I used to be worried about eating certain foods and beverages that will keep me energize. But keeping the discipline and have a balanced meal also appreciate my weight really taught me to just be natural. I have also seen models have the same problems.I feel very confident now.

[@kathryn_morgan]

+Melody PINK Ballerina Thank you Melody!

[@feliciaandersson5417]

Love you Kathryn!! Your videos are great!!

[@kathryn_morgan]

+Felicia Andersson Thank you!

[@princessmarlena1359]

They tried to shame me and the other dancers for “getting too fat”, tried to pressure us into extreme dieting, but I and a few others refused to cave to that pressure. We were kicked out of some dance companies, or suspended from others. Ironically those dance companies would beg us to come back shortly afterwards, they needed us more than we did them, and we didn’t get as much flak for our weight. Your health comes first.

[@neelycrombie1263]

Things I know about eating disorders.. They usually occur with people who are high over achievers and perfectionist. It's all about the control. Most times there is a broken relationship with a parent or parent figure. It's astonishing how most sufferers have these thing in common.

[@cbudzyn]

You nailed this being a “spectrum disorder” you can be Anorexic, Bulimic, however there are variations as you mentioned. Great job.

[@starflower666]

eating disorder stress leads to thyroid problems sometimes!

[@Barbiegirlmomma]

I used to be anorexic and addicted to exercise, for me it was about control! I was a model and in the entertainment industry. It is definitely mental.

[@pansprayers]

ED's, from a psychological perspective are 100% about control. You aren't the only one who feels that way, unfortunately. However, while it may be rooted in a mental process, it's also very physical as well. Anorexia is classed as the most deadly mental illness known for a reason.

[@mellotune7]

Thanks for sharing this video! I love everything that you said, especially at the end. I agree that ballet isn't everything, and hearing that from you means a lot to me. I struggle with binge eating at night -- I eat barely anything during the day, but over do it at night. I remember an article where SF Ballet School came under fire after the city passed a new law that employers can't discriminate based on weight after what a student's parent was told by the school. For ballet, the company dancers today seems a lot more diverse in every aspect, including weight.

[@exmmaee]

I always feel nice when I'm watching your videos. Ballet videos help me a lot and you have a beautiful accent so I can understand everything. Thank you ❤️

[@mayaadrianna317]

I'm not that dancer that's skiny and fita in with my class. I feel kind of left out because other girls say that since I'm not skinny so I can't do or look a certain way. I'm not big, I'm just more muscular and actually have a bust line and not flat chested. So I would try to watch what I eat, but sometimes it hard and I realize that I'm 13 and don't need to worry about that stuff. Although I dont have as mental disorder, I was diagnosed of having extreme depression so I'm juggling dance and my health. I'll be in the middle of a combo and then all of a sudden I feel like I'm just loosing my life so I would have to sit and get myself together. Depression may not be as bad as Anorexia but its still hard. It really starts getting worse when my scars show when I don't have a long sleeve Leo to wear. Everyone looks like at me funny and its hard covering them make up if they're new. Disorders are terrible no matter what you have. I may just have depression try and take my life, but there are also others out there suffering far worse than I am. And that is what people should think about

[@lojainnasr3574]

Oh my.... Ignore these girls. Talk to your teacher, and know people care! Your family would be heartbroken and would blame themselves if anything were to happen to you! I would too! Considering this is the 5th time I've watched this video and I'm just now replying to you. Stay strong!

[@katielarsen2630]

I'm sorry you're dealing with that at such a young age, you're an athlete and it sounds like you're physically healthy so don't worry about comparing yourself to others

[@anisaa5892]

Im sorry your're dealing with this but you'll get through it! Talk to someone and if you dont have anyone, talk to me, I'll always be here for you and I care about you more than you know!

[@Phoenixhunter157]

Thank you for being you!! By being being the best version of yourself- you have become a trailblazer for others. You are changing the world of ballet for everybody

[@NoelleHorn]

Love this! This side of the ballet world scares me. My sister was a ballet dancer for 10 years and I watched her become obsessive about her weight and her appearance and it ultimately drove her to quit.

[@midnight851]

I'd like to thank you for making this video Katie; it is a very difficult topic and you covered it eloquently. I suffered with the disorder of anorexia and had bulimic tendencies (I would purge in the form of over-exercise) from the ages of 10 until I was about 14, and there was a point where I was hospitalized due to my low bmi of 15 and heart failure (My average resting heart rate was 32 beats per minute). I have been physically recovered for two years and only now do I feel like I'm truly out of that mental state. Ballet has really helped with this. I have been dancing 3-5 times a week for a year now and for a long time it was the only period where I could look at my body and not criticize it for the shape it took; instead I was more concerned about things involving placement. It is unfortunate that aesthetics are more often than not placed at a higher level of importance than health (especially in ballet), but I see this slowly changing.

[@meandonlyme239]

Thank you so much for this video. I have been struggling with anorexia for 4 years now. Dance is the one thing that makes me feel alive and I don't have to worry about my body. Thank you for bringing awareness to this awful illness

[@kathryn_morgan]

+Nikki In Wonderland I am so sorry you are struggling Nikki. But I am so glad dance is helping you!

[@kissdiss143]

Thank you for openly sharing your experience. I admire you're bravery and kindness to us young women. I hope and pray that you have a complete and quick recovery from your illness.

[@robynthompson412]

Great topic to start with Katie ... I remember in middle school into high school we had a friend who suffered with an eating disorder she would eat so much then late at night would throw it back up. It has been awhile since hearing she is doing better but it is still a struggle she is going to face. Even had a friend I had in college who has an issue with her eating. She still has issues, she is skin and bones. I remember we were talking on Facebook and she was actually back in another, for lack of a better word, rehab facility. She made the assumption I knew why she was there but would not say the reason. I always felt bad when people would make fun of her in our dorm. I pray that my friend gets better and not have to deal with any more issues. She always looks happy so I hope life gets brighter for her.

[@lacouerfairy]

You are brave to talk about this and your own experience. Eating disorders can be so secret, so hush hush. Especially in the ballet world. You are a wonderful example to young dancers!

[@kathryn_morgan]

+lacouerfairy Thank you

[@melrose800]

Such an important topic to talk about.

[@mjgbabydragonlet]

Thank you for taking the time to be there for young Dancers! The more videos I watch of you, I see how much you care. About your art, your character shines through! I love the art and athleticism of ballet!

[@fredrika27]

Thank you for addressing this issue. Ladies, I want you to listen! Many health issues are brought on by eating disorders and poor nutrition. I have friends who were in acting, dance and sports who no longer can have children or who have chronic (this means life long) illnesses because they starved themselves. What angers me about the ballet world is that they make fun of normal size people or girls who are slightly over weight. It's terrible and mars the reputation of the dance world as people who are shallow. I am so glad that there are the Misty Copeland and Michaela DePrince who have different body types which says that you can be different, but healthy. At the end of the day, ask yourself do you want to have a long life, enjoy children, grandchildren and great grandchildren, travel, have a career that you like, etc. If you say yes to these things, then you have to eat properly to see that you live long enough to reach these goals. I am now 51, 75kilos, 165cm. I've have a beautiful teenage son. I have many friends who have careers, but no family because they damaged themselves. For some a pet replaces a child, but for the majority they are bitter about the choices they made. At the end it's not worth it, because so few go pro! Think on your life. Dance, but get an education to fall back on. There is so much to live for!

[@mdancer6053]

Thank you for making this Video to make it clear. The thing that triggers me the most is my ballet teacher because she always says right before a show like now the cast list is coming out soon and she always says we need to eat heathly two weeks prior to the cast list coming out and until we preform and finishes the shows and she always includes that starving yourself won’t do anything for you and that it eats away at your muscle and that you should never do it but I don’t think she understand how an ed comes about or how much that triggers me when she gives us a lecture on Ed’s and starving yourself... I do love how she always complements us at least once in every class like today she said I love your new Leo that’s a cool design on the back and it felt good so that’s all I has to say

[@fCLEF007]

I can't stop looking at the shade of blue of your eyes, like Arwen from LOTR - you have lovely colouring … bit jealous! thank you for your helpful videos :)

[@oliviaiturmendigamble]

Even if you’re not “starving” yourself you can still have anorexia, you can have anorexia obsessive purging sub-type, that can be through excercise not necessarily making yourself sick, and can never fully recover until you are treated by a professional. Starting to eat well again does not mean you’re recovered.

[@smOVERCOMINGITALL]

I had disordered eating when i was in high school. I'm a short gal, 5 foot nothing so my "tiny" frame didn't send anyone into a panic even when i was fluctuating around 89-92 pounds. the scary part was that no one noticed, however like yourself it didn't go into a full on eating disorder like some have. I would not eat all day until dinner... and i'd binge. It was almost like this "intermittent fasting" but instead of a window and a fast i was basically just fasting until i had my 1 meal. It wasn't a huge hindrance on my body at the time until instead of my families meals (which where usually pretty big meals) i started going vegan... but vegan eating once a day. i'm sure anyone educated on veganism can see the issue with this. That's when i got down to 85 pounds and THAT'S when people started saying something to me. But again... i was tiny anyway so it was never a shocking thing people just kind of noticed. Well i met my now husband senior year and for whatever reason that slowly went away. I think maybe because he was so caring and helpful and that's what i needed at the time. I stopped being vegan as well and got up to a normal weight. I still struggle sometimes with food... but i started to realize that the reason this started happening was because my brother died right before i started freshman year. Emotional control is what i was looking for and since no one noticed for a good 3 years i got away with it. Idk if i would have ever gotten to a point where it was worse, but i'm glad i didn't. I was definitely on that path.

[@kimberlypowell2798]

thank you for talking about this and sharing your experience. I've been dealing with an eating disorder for almost 17 years, even though I'm not skinny.

[@kathryn_morgan]

+Kimberly Powell Of course Kimberly. It can often feel very lonely.

[@wendyisafarmer]

Thank you so much for keeping it real!

[@alicialuna1246]

I have always been muscular to the point where I want to lose some so I can slim down. I have come so close on so many occasions to starving myself but I could never follow through with it. Part of me knows that's not the answer (and I like food too much). I just eat healthy instead and embrace my strong muscles.

[@DionneWard]

My lowest I was 5.5 stone and I was ill. I hid from photos but ballet saved me as I had done it and had a break then at 17 worked on my first west end show in London and being around all the dancing again was brilliant (I was home) sadly no I have a thyroid problem and I am a bus but not making myself ill but have to admit I hate my body and spend days in tears. Something other KZbinrs never see as I always look happy. I think only another dancer can truly understand how I feel when I feel huge. Hopefully the thyroid meds will kick in soon 💕

[@Anna-sc3gq]

I wanna know how you feel about this now because your back in a company and lost weight.. please make an update

[@lexiemay7843]

Thank you so much Katie for addressing issues like this that should be discussed more with young dancers :) Please come visit/ dance in Australia one day! We all love you! x

[@lockheart619]

This is important. I had to learn the hard way.

[@valeriehincks7715]

When I was a teen I went through something similar with being obsessed with food and ended up weighing 98 pounds but eventually got over it thank god

[@milliexox5977]

you're amazing. your videos are so supportive and inspiring! p.s id love to see a video on what sort of dance teacher you think gets the best out of their students xx

[@balletfan4154]

you're so lovely and kind :)

[@leebox902]

Very helpful video katie! Can you please do a video about improvig jumps? Because after a few jumps I find myself really tired and weak so maybe my tecnique is wrong. And another video suggstion is a motviation video of never give up and don't let jealousy get in your way, because I find myself really struggeling with motvition when i'm not one of the bests in class. Thank you!

[@emmarose8230]

I love your videos and your light that you bring into every video you make!☺

[@kathryn_morgan]

+Prima Baker Thank you so much!

[@S.colleen]

Hi, I'm anorexic but I'm not underweight. I'm nowhere near stick thin. I have tried to talk to my parents and my friends but they don't believe me because I "don't look anorexic". They won't let me see a therapist or a nutritionist because they think that I'm only saying that I'm anorexic for attention. They say that if I was anorexic that I would be thin and that I wouldn't say it. Is there any advice you could give me to help? Thank you.

[@milliejay1451]

Sarah Broughton I'm not saying I don't believe you but you can't diagnose yourself but you can take yourself to see a doctor and then they will get in contact with your family and arrange therapy sessions with them.

[@S.colleen]

Musical star Is not self diagnosed if you physically cannot make yourself eat for weeks at a time. That's clearly anorexia. Also I can't drive. But thank you for the advice.

[@ballet-twin3006]

Sarah Broughton I would honestly go to a doctor. I go through fazes of not eating for weeks upon time and I do not have anorexia. I went to the doctor after I thought I did and I was not anorexic. I would go to the doctor and then get help. It is not the best way to help yourself by just getting help without getting diagnosed before you go cauae it will be harder for therapists to help you without a doctor's diagnosis.

[@S.colleen]

Cat Vergueiro it just that I can't bring myself to eat. I've always been a really picky eater but a few years ago it got to the point where eating food just terrified me. I know I have a serious problem but there is nothing I can do. I haven't found someone that I'm comfortable going to yet. I don't have a lot of friends and the one I have told tells me to just eat, but they don't realize it's not that simple. Maybe I'll be able to find someone to help. Thank you for the advice.❤️

[@user-jg3yx8yu4l]

Hi there. I would schedule an appointment with a doctor. Tell your family you don't feel well and need to see the doctor but don't point out the anorexia (bc they don't believe you on that). When you're there you can ask to see the doctor in private, explain your problem and ask for help and see if they can lead you to therapy. Also ask them to help explain to your family your true situation, and hopefully they will take it from a professional. It's so good that you're pointing out that you don't have to be stick thin and underweight to be anorexic, that's only for people who didn't get help early enough and have already gone very far. It shouldn't have to be that way, people shouldn't have to wait until they've gone so far to get help, so I hope things work out well for you. I'm rooting for you! :)

[@cherrymoonweb22mccann94]

Your right it dosent matter what or size is its about how beautifully we dance and express through the music 💖😸💖

[@laurabertrand1999]

I’m a dancer who has been dancing for majority of my life and am currently in recovery from anorexia-binge purge subtype. Which basically means I would starve myself for up to a few days at a time then binge to stop the pain, followed by making myself throw up. that lasted for two years, And I’m now six months into recovery and feeling better than ever.

[@user-se8sy8ex6l]

Thanks so much for this video, I really think, that many young girls need to hear this, that’s not all about being skinny. I mean, me too. I think I handle this thing with balance and health and nutrition etc. very well, but sometimes I look in the mirror and just doubt myself, and it’s so good to hear, that I’m really on the right way. I’m so happy that some company’s start to accept Girls with wide shoulders or muscular arms and legs, I really hope that other company’s will copy it. And I really hope, that ballerinas will be allowed to have boops as well, cause that’s really nothing you can do about (like just train it away) and it restricts so many of us (me too).

[@X1715llb]

This is so what I needed to hear, thank you so much for sharing this video Katie💕💕

[@kathryn_morgan]

+Erin Elizabeth Thanks Erin!

[@irishslipjig]

Thank you for sharing!!! Great thoughtful words.

[@mindyhardy1020]

my favorite KZbinr right now

[@kasiamendyka1119]

This film is so helpful. Thank you 😃

[@nuriatolsa]

Hey Katie! Great video! As always... so much common sense!

[@kathryn_morgan]

+ntc Thank you!

[@mayaramichellinascimento3054]

You're so great in what you do! Thank you for this video :)

[@sabinamasarikova1743]

You are realy helpfull for us.🙌🙂 Thank you.I'm ballet dancer and I have eating disorder now. I don't know how it starts, but I'm fully focused on eating. I'm not even hungry, but I want eat. I always try to say stop, but then I come to the kitchen, eat that chocolate or bread and later some sort of hate myself. I was counting calories and watch what I eating All the time. My mum saw my youtube and told me to stop, because my whole KZbin is about food and diy's. I would try focuse on my technique and hope it will be better. Big thanks to you for that...☺️ -fan from Slovakia🇸🇰

[@sarah-ur5px]

Thank you so much for making this video ❤️😘

[@kathryn_morgan]

+Fobtøppatd Trash My pleasure.

[@Dragon34th]

I always have a great admiration for ballet as a sport discipline I think it's the ancestor of all the sports. I mean no other sports beat ballet when it comes to fluidity of limbs, coordination, balance and flexibility. I'm a martial artist & the reason I'm watching ballet lately is because I just realised had I practiced ballet, my hip and limb flexibility would have been far superior :) I would have been able to execute more beautiful higher kicks and my balance would have been much better. Anyway, if I have a kid, boy or girl, ballet class or out of my house :)

[@auroraschultz8048]

I am really glad you made this video because I have High metabolism and I'm incredibly tiny and I eat five meals a day and I only weigh 70 pounds and everyone my age us usually 100 and its hard because they say I eat so much and then gag myself or in anorexic. But I'm not in just tiny and they are being so harsh to me about it.

[@katethegreat4918]

The same thing happened to me, I am genetically skinny. In highschool, people used to ask me if I was anorexic. People should not use words like that flippantly, what if I actually was? They could have made the problem worse!

[@videovideo913]

hey Katie! your videos are very good cause there is so much quality. probs to you that you want to help everybody. you are the greatest dancer I've ever seen! I've seen the vlog from vlogmas, it was the heart to heart video and I think that you look like a ballerina because you ARE a ballerina so you look like one. hope your father is fine!

[@kathryn_morgan]

+Video Video Thank you so much!

[@swordofswan]

TBH for me it’s really annoying because I’m naturally skinny. Very skinny. I’m healthy I eat the world but I just never get bigger. I’m 79 pounds and 5 feet. The problem is my digestive system works really fast and doesn’t separate fat well, even if I eat ALL of the 10 tacos put in front of me, which I would do, my body never getter bigger. People comment on my bad ya lot saying, you need to gain weight you are not strong when really I play competitive hockey and skating at high levels and my legs are strong. It’s really annoying

[@tommax26]

My mother was bulimic. I believe it started by her co-worker making an off-hand remark. Mom was only 4 foot 11 inches but was big busted. This girl said mom was fat, when she was only top heavy. This triggered mom into bulimia... being deathly afraid of REALLY being fat. She got down to 84 pounds and her nutrition health was so poor she started having broken bones from bumps or tripping falls. For energy she drank black coffee constantly. This made her nerves on edge so she became a chain smoker to calm down. What a vicious unhappy circle. (Sticks and stones may break bones, but harsh poorly chosen words can be worse.)

[@fificaroline1141]

Would you consider doing a "What I eat in a day" video? Like a follow me around type thing? xxx

[@dlourdes4743]

I began dancing at 22..i was atletic already.but dancing ballet alone i lost over 20 pounds quickly...it is very difficult to jump if you are overweight..it is simple science ..I was able to keepmy weight normal for many years thanks to practicing ballet..then i had 2 children and breadfed for many years and obviouly gained a lotof weight..but loose all the weight once i resume ballet practice and running.fasting and keto diet works for me...yes it is a lot of sacrifice..but when i eat i really appreciate the food and besides i love to look beautuful and being size 4-6 Makes me look very attractive

[@juliannagk9079]

I once was anorexic. I didn’t realize it for a little while, and then it hit me all of a sudden. I counted every single calorie, most of my calories came from sugary drinks that kept me going. I didn’t eat a lot, at all, and was really malnourished. I didn’t lose a lot of weight because I already was at a too low weight and literally couldn’t lose anymore. I started noticing, so I changed and began exercising so I would lose again, and build muscle so no one noticed. I had to be hospitalized for dehydration because I lived on sodas. I met my boyfriend at that time and it was so much worse. I stayed on top of my food at all times, I didn’t eat at all, I couldn’t eat. I was being abused and it was horrible. I got away from him and it was a little better. My family had noticed and started making sure I ate. When I met my now boyfriend of two years, he didn’t care I was too thin. He didn’t care what my weight was and he even complained that I was too skinny. He made me happy. Helped my depression. And he would force feed if I got out of hand (it was necessary for me because I would not eat). He helped me out of it and then I got nexplanon.... worst choice I ever made and I gained 60 lbs. I am now slowly and healthily losing weight, but it’s hard. It is really hard. I have people who keep me morivated and keep me healthy.

[@marianahafiz6857]

My goodness, your makeup is gorgeous! Would love a tutorial on that :) great video once again!

[@kathryn_morgan]

+Mariana Hafiz Thank you!