Sister, what you are going through is quite normal, when you start to take an interest in the deep meaning of life, you start to realize what you have always been, that everything that had happened before was to take you in this direction, and that the more you evolve in this direction, the more the true nature of this life will appear to you and you will have discernment, and the more you evolve, the more strange you will feel among people, among your friends, and if you continue to follow this path, there will even come a time when you will isolate yourself from people, but don't let it scare you, i think he (God) has chosen you in your family and wants you to be the gateway of his religion in your family.
@yasser-ahmed_HSh3 ай бұрын
As-salamu Alaykum dear sister Rukia. About your question about silk, the prophet Muhammad(ﷺ) forbid silk and gold upon men of his nation (except for medical reasons for silk only) and permitted them for women. As for your thinking and behaviors it's your fitrah (innate predisposition) God Almighty create all creatures upon it. Hope you benefit from this.