Emotionally unavailable parents

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The Holistic Psychologist

The Holistic Psychologist

4 ай бұрын

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Пікірлер: 551
@aquachonk
@aquachonk 4 ай бұрын
Can confirm. Oh, and Tip: Don't try to get confirmation or closure from these people later in life. They're goin' to the grave floatin' down that river in Egypt. Denial.
@babyshooz
@babyshooz 4 ай бұрын
100%
@user-xx5ek8iw6p
@user-xx5ek8iw6p 4 ай бұрын
Truth!! Well put!
@TheJCMlove
@TheJCMlove 4 ай бұрын
Maybe their eyes have not been opened to the effect of their behavior or they are not ready to accept accountability. It's on child turned adult to break the cycle and heal from the effects, parental admission not required.
@Mashup-l7y
@Mashup-l7y 4 ай бұрын
Don’t be so sure… some of us have gone to enough therapy to figure it out in time to break the cycle for our own kids🙌🏼 Praise God!
@buhleshezi3274
@buhleshezi3274 4 ай бұрын
True it's so hard
@queernarwhal
@queernarwhal 4 ай бұрын
"After all i've always had to work to be loved" OOF
@marycrowley1442
@marycrowley1442 4 ай бұрын
I worked to be loved, but I didn’t accomplish it. I don’t think I was loved.
@FleetwoodCaddy59
@FleetwoodCaddy59 4 ай бұрын
@@marycrowley1442I know I was never loved. Sometimes it hurts me but I don’t really have feelings about much anymore. I’m sorry for your pain. I understand how hard it is to realize that you are not loved.💜
@whynot6054
@whynot6054 4 ай бұрын
OOF...
@realitymuzic357
@realitymuzic357 4 ай бұрын
I audibly said oof to this one too lmao
@Fytrzaczek21
@Fytrzaczek21 4 ай бұрын
What, you didn't?
@mailill
@mailill 4 ай бұрын
"I learned to think ahead"
@nuyabeez
@nuyabeez 4 ай бұрын
I feel seen
@michelleburt8586
@michelleburt8586 4 ай бұрын
I always do that, no matter what it is
@CodeineCutie
@CodeineCutie 4 ай бұрын
😅 and quick responses
@Candace575
@Candace575 4 ай бұрын
Yeah and this isn’t good. .
@dovie2blue
@dovie2blue 4 ай бұрын
​@@Candace575Because it's not based in reality
@rymndry
@rymndry 2 ай бұрын
“Perfection is the only way I think I’m worthy of being loved” DAMN that one was a dagger to the heart
@ravenraven966
@ravenraven966 4 ай бұрын
Oh dear... This hits home....
@Charlotte-sx3bs
@Charlotte-sx3bs 4 ай бұрын
Same! 😂😭
@Candace575
@Candace575 4 ай бұрын
Yah made me cry
@ravenraven966
@ravenraven966 4 ай бұрын
@@Candace575 , I'm sorry I made you cry....sister.... But it's true isn't it... That's why we cry🙏💙
@YaLittleFriend
@YaLittleFriend 3 ай бұрын
Oh dear for me too!!!!😫
@sissi3638
@sissi3638 4 ай бұрын
Notice every shift in your mood or tone
@estherclark820
@estherclark820 4 ай бұрын
"Emotional bread crumbs"... taste great. As emotionally malnourished people, how would we even know how being emotionally satiated is supposed to feel? Learning to reparent oneself, to give oneself comfort, acceptance, encouragement >sustenance
@river8142
@river8142 4 ай бұрын
That first one lol. It makes texting/messaging hell. I could deplete my social battery for an entire day on a 1 hour dm chat because of how much energy I expend trying to read the other person's mind through their stickers and punctuation marks 😭 and then I draft and redraft every message in case I turn them off or cross a line. Fucking tiring man, I don't know how to turn it off.
@CarrieVogel77
@CarrieVogel77 4 ай бұрын
You are worthy of love.
@sriracha_sauce
@sriracha_sauce 4 ай бұрын
I'm sorry you've had to feel this way. We should all be able to feel comfortable being ourselves to others without fear of rejection or abandonment. :(
@Camaika1997
@Camaika1997 4 ай бұрын
wait.... not everyone does this? fck
@P.e.m.a.
@P.e.m.a. 4 ай бұрын
I quit 1) giving a fuck and 2) talking to people that arent VIPs. Helped me a lot. 😂😅😅 I think telling myself repeatedly that "this convo prob wont matter in a day", or "people generally are self-obsessed and dont actually care what i think or do" helped me immensly to the point that i just dont look into it anymore. I just dont have the energy for it at my age, so i quit the habit. And if people dont put in the proper energy to communicate (for example, mumbling), i assume its unimportant and ignore. Im 35. It seems to happen with age. I cared SOOO much when i was younger - borderline crippling. Nope. My years go up and my fucks go down. Its beautiful. Thats why old people have exactly ZERO fucks to give. They do what they want and tell it like it is. Finally choose to be a person instead of everyones clown. 😎
@rose5566
@rose5566 3 ай бұрын
@@P.e.m.a.good for you! I can relate to that. Cared too much about what people think for way too many years of my young life when I should have been carefree. Now I am 61 years old and wonder why I wasted my youth on being so obsessed with what other people thought of me. Exhausting and a waste of time.
@emilywinterflood8793
@emilywinterflood8793 3 ай бұрын
I always wondered why peoples tones and moods affected me so damn badly ….any shift and I was anxious….now I know why 😢- TY for this video xx
@slademurf2620
@slademurf2620 4 ай бұрын
I love how you deliver these lines while nonchalantly doing everyday things. When trauma and unhealthy coping techniques are the everyday while growing up, they don’t feel as shocking as they should be when you’re an adult.
@katrinar2071
@katrinar2071 4 ай бұрын
You don't realize how bad it was until someone else points it out. A friend who says "wow I don't know how you handled that. How you deal with that." But it was completely normal to you so don't question it or think anything of it. Seeing another family or other relationships that are healthy and wholesome and you first tell yourself "well that can't be real that must be their 'TV' relationship. Surely they can't be like that when no one else is around". But then you keep seeing it. Seeing more people and families that really are like that. It's uncomfortable at first. My first instinct is to roll my eyes and think "look at the perfect people. So goody goody. " And think they have no idea what it's like to have problems. But then as you're around people like them more you realize... they have problems just like I do. The difference is they are there for each other. Supportive. Helping each other with whatever is needed no matter the age. When they ask for help they get it. No questions asked. No ableist bull. " You should be able to do that on your own." No. They just help. Then you realize that's how families should be. And you begin to mourn the family you could have and should have had. And who you could have been and the life you could have if you had had that family growing up. Mine wasn't awful. But definitely dysfunctional enough to have caused lasting issues for myself and my siblings.
@CopperCoin0017
@CopperCoin0017 2 ай бұрын
​@katrinar2071 I have no words.... The way you described your childhood was like the saddest poem. Beautifully written, but full of loss and sadness.🥺 It sounds like you're conquering that dark past with a BRIGHT NEW YOU!! 🌞 🙏 "IT'S NOT ABOUT HOW YOU STARTED, IT MATTERS HOW YOU FINISH"!! WITH NO TESTS IN LIFE, WE WOULDN'T HAVE A TESTIMONY! GOD BLESS YOU 🙌 🙏 ❤️
@hals999
@hals999 4 ай бұрын
My mom was busy with trying mostly unsuccessfully to emotionally regulate herself. I was walkong on eggshells and i ended up being an addict for most of my life 15 to 30 i got clean 09 02 2022 and i am doing a TON of work to grow into a safe person for myself and my kids. I love your channel ❤
@phnsinrspt
@phnsinrspt 2 ай бұрын
I'm happy for you, that sounds like a lot of work! Thank you for sharing!
@notbeingsarcastic5947
@notbeingsarcastic5947 Ай бұрын
So proud of you!! That's worth celebrating. Sorry for what you went through though 😕 that's tough
@hals999
@hals999 Ай бұрын
Thanks. I was a bit.concerned I was trauma dumping this a nice community on this channel 🩷
@shivalishankersharma1562
@shivalishankersharma1562 4 ай бұрын
I always wondered why I immediately crack a self deprecating joke after a compliment or downplay my achievments. Like “oh no, I just got lucky” . Wow
@20NotTwothousand
@20NotTwothousand 4 ай бұрын
It’s an exhausting way to go through life. I’m doing my best to love and care for myself first. ✌️❤️
@JennyJeong425
@JennyJeong425 4 ай бұрын
You deserve that. You deserve a happy life.
@lenaw414
@lenaw414 4 ай бұрын
I was today years old when I learned that my parents were apparently emotionally unavailable 😅 I mean my dad was just absent, so ok. But I guess my mother’s instability, anger outbursts and screaming at the top of her lungs amounted to more than I thought. 🤔
@kj.4977
@kj.4977 4 ай бұрын
Had the same exact upbringing. Really sucks not having a stable or secure childhood
@MsJoyce31202
@MsJoyce31202 4 ай бұрын
Yes.
@user-rh9gc3rf3x
@user-rh9gc3rf3x 4 ай бұрын
Yep. Relate. 🫲
@nellieshoals
@nellieshoals 4 ай бұрын
Yes bc your basic needs of safety, stability, security, love were not met
@j.k4987
@j.k4987 4 ай бұрын
Mine is the same. i have developed panic attacks bc of her and anorexia bc of anxiety
@Ichneumonxx
@Ichneumonxx 4 ай бұрын
Yep, that's me. I don't even react to breadcrumbing because there was no breadcrumbing. I found people being nice to me suspicious at best.
@Thomas_Winters
@Thomas_Winters 4 ай бұрын
For real. I can’t trust anyone because I’ll cling on to the smallest bit of kindness. Now I keep my distance from any seemingly nice people. Depressed people, I can trust more. They’re real.
@Leann-uj9rg
@Leann-uj9rg 3 ай бұрын
It always seemed like that person who was really nice and gave you respect was just weird. I would think what’s wrong with them?
@Thatgoatgirl
@Thatgoatgirl 3 ай бұрын
*suspicious eyes* forever
@ericasmith-arndt2678
@ericasmith-arndt2678 4 ай бұрын
That bread crumb one hit hard 👀👀
@tessahall797
@tessahall797 4 ай бұрын
This short is so spot on, the only think I’ll disagree with is that not everyone becomes a perfectionist. You either become a perfectionist or an underachiever. I read somewhere (and I believe this true) that if there is anyone in your life that does care or support you, like a grandparent, aunt, neighbors parent etc, you become an overachiever. If you literally having no one in your corner you become an underachiever.
@scootergirl3662
@scootergirl3662 3 ай бұрын
I think it’s known that not every single person coming through situation is gonna turn out that way - Morceau showing a very common situation so people can realize it in themselves if it applies to them
@Slut4NoOne
@Slut4NoOne 3 ай бұрын
I’m a perfectionist but somehow an underachiever…
@SarahBeara33
@SarahBeara33 4 ай бұрын
Dang. You really nailed it! Painful but true.
@nobodynowhere21
@nobodynowhere21 4 ай бұрын
most days i don't feel it's worth it to live like this. i pray that meditation helps. staying away from drugs and my family helped a lot too. but also left life feeling empty and meaningless.
@TheDavveponken
@TheDavveponken 4 ай бұрын
You will get there in time. This vhannel and patrick teahan (also on yt) is a great resource. Just stay away from psych drug. Reminding yourself there's nothing fundamentally wrong with you and you are this way out of necessity growing up will let you let it go.
@babaganoush1775
@babaganoush1775 4 ай бұрын
You're so brave to make those choices for you. I hope meditation helps you too. I can tell you from personal experience that it does help. Just be patient with yourself. Healing takes time. You'll find your light; its been there all along. I'm proud of you, and I support your journey.
@yamib1550
@yamib1550 4 ай бұрын
The fact that you decided to stay away from what wasn’t good for you is proof that at the deepest core of your being, you know that there’s a better way to live. Keep going- you’ve already taken the most important step toward living a healthy and fulfilling life.
@sherryhubbard8612
@sherryhubbard8612 4 ай бұрын
I get this so much. I feel like not being here but I stay for my kids and husband. Meditation has really changed my life in so many ways. If you need some guided meditations or resources I love Tara Brach. She wrote a book called radical acceptance, which is phenomenal and there are a ton of free resources on her website. Every day I am intentionally practicing breaking out of the trance (we call life) to realize how much bigger life can be when we break away from our egoic thinking. Sending you love and prayers.
@babaganoush1775
@babaganoush1775 4 ай бұрын
@@sherryhubbard8612 I love that you mentioned Tara Brach; I've been listening to her for years, and love her book True Refuge. I just listened to her episode "Navigating the Dark Ages" this morning! May her work, and the wisdom of your own heart, continue to heal you. Blessings 💜
@EmuInDenial
@EmuInDenial 4 ай бұрын
This is so true unfortunately. I learnt that I have to earn my parents' love and that they will love me only if I'm perfect.
@BlinkinFirefly
@BlinkinFirefly 4 ай бұрын
Perfectionism is my mom because of her emotionally unavailable parents. I'm the one who notices every mood shift and change in tone, and we both accepted emotional breadcrumbs in relationships and are both hypervigilant too. Saying it's utterly exhausting is the biggest understatement.
@storm4515
@storm4515 4 ай бұрын
I’ve got PhD’s in tuning into micro shifts of a person’s body, facial expressions, and mood.
@opossumsauce4472
@opossumsauce4472 4 ай бұрын
I had emotionally unavailable parents, I've since learned that my family and I are autistic. They tried their best but children can be overstimulating. I still love them a lot but it's good to understand that they're people too. Forgiving is apart of healing
@perregrine
@perregrine 4 ай бұрын
Emotionally unavailable is just a nicer way of saying abusive and/or neglectful. Forgiveness is not healing when it means betraying yourself. Anger means I know I deserved better and they had no reason not to try.
@peaceofmindofpeace1650
@peaceofmindofpeace1650 4 ай бұрын
The endless breadcrumbing dating experiences 🙄
@imtired823
@imtired823 4 ай бұрын
And getting attached because it's just "normal" and what you're used to.
@valeriegiles6524
@valeriegiles6524 4 ай бұрын
Keep in mind we were all mostly raised by parents that were taught showing emotion was a sign of weakness. Break the cycle. Love anyway. Just because you can. ❤
@jeannievail
@jeannievail 4 ай бұрын
After nine years of patiently loving a tender hearted man like this, just when we were about to build a new life together, a year ago, he said that I was too important to risk losing to a failed relationship because I am the only person he can really talk to so losing me would be his worst nightmare. As a child, he only got hugs when he visited his grandparents for Christmas. He never felt truly loved before me and was literally abandoned by everyone he ever loved before me. And now I have abandoned him too by telling him Saturday night that I can’t survive on his friendship alone and watch him making all of my dreams come true for other women anymore. 😢 Now he’s pulling out all the stops for a woman who confessed to me that she has all of the toxic traits he said he never wanted to deal with again. She spends money like it’s water, admits that she has always called her children horrible names, even when they were little she called her daughter a demon child and has always said that her son is as dumb as a bag of rocks. She brags about manipulating men into doing her favors, laughed about being too engrossed in her phone to notice her own boyfriend almost drowned while trying to rescue her mother in a kayaking incident, and gets blackout drunk frequently, but I know it’s all he ever knew before me. 😢
@SodaAvenue
@SodaAvenue 4 ай бұрын
Hi, just a passerby here. I don't think I'm ever in the position to comment on another person's life. Allow me to give my limited knowledge of one kind of a 3rd party pov (outsider have detached emotions so it may be clearer to see what's going on, from a different perspective from your current 'narrative + emotions' aka tinted lens) : -i want you to know, no matter your bckgrd and your past, your past traumas, wounds etc.."You, my dear, are Whole and Complete!" While this future partner you dedicate so much time and effort felt like a lost cause. It may be a sign. He wasn't ready. He may not be the one suitable. Not yet. Not at his current growth stage. Also, some people are truly meant to be friends and not partners. -By giving your time, energy, and dedicating your attention to tend to this guy... also gradually growing affection for him. Receiving mutual sparks... "sometimes that 'chemistry', is a false illusion. may be a subconscious misconception of something in us.. a mirror reflection of what may be oblivious to us, when some inner beliefs or bias are not cleared" -(There's a carl jung concept of anima or animus in psychology. Who we are attract to based on our past bckgrd etc.. is the part we lack. until we dive deep by 1stly notice and being aware of it....later taking steps to address it. If not cycle goes on. We subconsciously attract at a frequency lvl what we have not yet cleared in ourselves. Eg. You may or may not, at the next person, meet similar trait subtle patterns after the surface level of trait stuff is peeled off) -I do not know what is your personal love language, or how you talk to yourself. I wish you well. maybe you can find a therapist and some book titles to explore with your an inner Part of yourself. (Until you discover your inner most neglected needs that needs loving, tender care. If not the longer it goes on and you get more Emotionally Drained Than Ever before!) -(some people have the 'rescue other people' subtle traits due to unresolved trauma parts of self and in terms neglect part of themselves) -I believe there is a part of you, commenting here that you want some form of respite, to perhaps feel the connection. With others in the same plight. I hope you find a positive support group online or offline that can listen empathetically or hold space for you, and may you be able to find your way back home. to yourself. -everyone have their own timeline on the maturity path. -pls tend to the part of you, that wants and yearns for your attention. The hurt and upset etc these Emotions are there for a reason. If you explore more into what they truly meant deep within.. behind the never ending negative begets more negative cycle of heartbroken narrative loop... on the equal end spectrum, something else arises...there's a part of you that you have not explored yet. The meaning behind the misty frosty glass that begged to be wiped. -(maybe the Emotion Code book can help you. I'm not too sure what will aid you as I've not cleared my path yet but im staying hopeful of it all, inside the dim light. A spark can create more sparks like a fire starter!) there's many layers.. waiting for you to explore. -when you gradually clear more and more, you may look back and see your lens more clearly, what looks hazy last time, there's a sense of inner clarity. It comes with practise. It starts somewhere. - just providing my 2 cents here. I'm sorry for your hurt, it's ok to feel hurt, rejected. Please tend to your inner child. Sorry for the chunk! Just trying to explain it somehow. (-you can choose to tell him what she said But Please dont get suck into their drama. It will make you more miserable being in between them. Who knows if he may blame you or not. Humans are emotional creatures and unpredictable. You may think you know him but love makes us reckless and reactive at times. -The only thing within control is your inner dialog to yourself and reactivity twds them. Time won't heal wounds. Discovering and exploring what's behind those emotions will help you move fwd from the misery hole. Maybe The 'shadow self'. -Best is do nothing at all. Time will show her to him. If it helps please try to ask for time out from him until you feel better. Bcos talking to him now creates more longing and hurt or whatever more may escalate as we female are more feminine, sensitive creatures! And avoid looking at resource clip like this to justify the hurt aka negative stuff. It prolongs the pain and suffering. Face him perhaps when you feel ready and better.) May you find strength, hope, love in places, things, signs unseen! Sending all my love and support! xoxo!
@jeannievail
@jeannievail 4 ай бұрын
@@SodaAvenue I really appreciate your encouragement. I’m touched by your words. Over the past few years I have done lots of meditation and for the last year I have used him as a mirror to see parts of my self that need healing. I have healed wounds I never knew I had. Since cutting him off two weeks ago, I am doing better than I expected. He has been in therapy for more than a year now but he still has far to go. Yesterday he sent me a funny meme, and I struggled not to respond but I managed to ignore it. He would have to produce significant evidence of real change, through his actions, not just words, before I would let him back into my life. In the meantime, I am already feeling stronger, still doing shadow work, with Positive Affirmations, RTT hypnotherapy, Ho’Oponopono Chanting, Guided Meditations, EFT Tapping, and Sleep Subliminals. Thank you for your supportive advice and kindness. ♥️
@goldenparachute392
@goldenparachute392 3 ай бұрын
He’s not into you sounds so glib. But sometimes we have to accept bitter pills in life to be able to move on from toxic and hurtful relationships. ❤
@TheNmv2728
@TheNmv2728 4 ай бұрын
These really help me understand myself. Thank you!!
@erickaepworth6257
@erickaepworth6257 3 ай бұрын
The sarcasm in this reel cuts so deep and true I honestly laughed out loud. 🤣 I've worked through enough trauma at this point I can do that now. 🙌
@renakirsch2804
@renakirsch2804 4 ай бұрын
I’m 61 yrs old and still crave my mother’s attention. When I told her she looked at me blankly like she didn’t know what to do. Then a he apologized and said she wasn’t a good mom. I felt sorry for her because she wasn’t totally bad. She satisfied every physical need of mine and I know she loves me a lot. But I wish I would have gotten some emotional attention, interaction, conversation, sharing… anything like that. It has left a huge void inside of me.
@basahij
@basahij 3 ай бұрын
The way you represent mental health issues is amazing and enlighting. Thank you for the work 🙏
@salvadormuro7346
@salvadormuro7346 4 ай бұрын
I learned to think ahead 💀 ahaaaa 😅
@n26c88
@n26c88 4 ай бұрын
Having EA parents is so exhausting
@LittleLulubee
@LittleLulubee 4 ай бұрын
Off topic, but I LOVE your sweater 🩷😍😍
@stephanies3246
@stephanies3246 4 ай бұрын
I noticed it too. It looks cozy.
@sarahstevenson8155
@sarahstevenson8155 4 ай бұрын
I love the pattern! Wish I knew where it was from haha
@beastshawnee
@beastshawnee 4 ай бұрын
I had emotional unavailable parents and a nightmare of physical abuse as well-so of course I became hyper- independent and can’t tolerate anyone who might not be up to my high moral standards- even if I have not held myself to other people’s. Self deprecating Good Two Shoes cannot relax or even sleep.
@monimannam
@monimannam 4 ай бұрын
What's the solution then 😢
@ladypirata4375
@ladypirata4375 4 ай бұрын
So, SOOOOO TRUE. And of course, I so can relate to this. THANK YOU FOR GIVING ME (US) CLARITY!!!!
@amybastock8370
@amybastock8370 4 ай бұрын
This hit close to home. But it also helped me make sense of some of my behaviors. Thank you. ❤
@christinaduncan3987
@christinaduncan3987 4 ай бұрын
Boy can I relate
@anneabelle7098
@anneabelle7098 4 ай бұрын
Holy shit you've absolutely nailed the impact my childhood had on me.
@MetalDeathMusic
@MetalDeathMusic 4 ай бұрын
ouch, this hurts. I have emotionally unavailable parents, and I never learned how to love myself.
@Moluccanmama
@Moluccanmama 4 ай бұрын
This hit home! 😢
@cattc6946
@cattc6946 4 ай бұрын
“I learn to think ahead” 😅
@the.toxic.phoenix
@the.toxic.phoenix 4 ай бұрын
Oh gosh, this is totally me. I'm working on the perfectionism, left my abusive husband, but I just can't seem to stop the hyper vigilance or take a compliment 😑 do you offer any tips for recovery?
@peaceofmindofpeace1650
@peaceofmindofpeace1650 4 ай бұрын
It sounds stupid but just say thank you. Practise to say thanks that's so nice of you! Then you get used to it and it will start to feel comfortable.
@the.toxic.phoenix
@the.toxic.phoenix 4 ай бұрын
@@peaceofmindofpeace1650 thank you, I'll try that. I've been reading about new brain pathways, so this would be a way to change my thought pattern, thank you
@peaceofmindofpeace1650
@peaceofmindofpeace1650 4 ай бұрын
@@the.toxic.phoenix Yw yes I'm also learning new things and more aware than ever how my brains have developed habits out of protectionisme to survive. I have suffered from emotional manipulation / mind games ( hot and cold, silence treatment) so I understand your vigilance. It helps me to think: regardless of their motives, it doesn't say anything about my worth but all about their integrity. Rationally we often know how things are but to feel it...😊 glad you are away from the abusive vibes and free to live happy and heal day by day 🩵
@alexba1ley
@alexba1ley 4 ай бұрын
if you have access to medical cannabis, i would talk to a qualified doctor about using it for hypervigilance/cptsd. if you are a candidate for it can really help. if it's dosed right, it's like you observe tense situations with a content detachment and little to no stress. on the other hand, if you take too much you can get even more anxious. it helps to have a cbd/cbg blend product on hand to bring you down if you take too much. good luck!
@christik9138
@christik9138 4 ай бұрын
these videos help me be more patient and compassionate towards myself and my friends and loved ones, thank you :)
@tammyhicks8699
@tammyhicks8699 3 ай бұрын
Wow!All of these are so true in my mind especially watching everyone's mood and tone and relationship sabotage.
@Nay-ze4lx
@Nay-ze4lx 4 ай бұрын
Forever grateful for the insight
@Lycancass89
@Lycancass89 4 ай бұрын
Oh my, I wish I could watch one of these & not relate. 😂
@P.Serenity
@P.Serenity 4 ай бұрын
Thank you I save all your shorts, I've never seen someone be so accurate.
@77Tadams
@77Tadams 4 ай бұрын
Same. I do tend to push people away if they get too close. I don't trust anyone.
@kkfjkf2099
@kkfjkf2099 4 ай бұрын
The accuracy 😮🎯💯
@TheTbear103
@TheTbear103 4 ай бұрын
😆 lol. It's giving me pharmacy ads
@dannomusic47
@dannomusic47 4 ай бұрын
Ouch, that hits every friggin mark.
@raghurammohan4859
@raghurammohan4859 4 ай бұрын
Inner child therapy
@Soulsurfermentality
@Soulsurfermentality 4 ай бұрын
How do u know me so well! 😅
@despoinachatzaga2555
@despoinachatzaga2555 3 ай бұрын
I did all that. My healing journey started 20 years ago and I have come to a pretty good point right now. I confronted both of them. My mom apologised and chagned her behavior 180 degrees so we have a good relationship now. My father denied everything, so I cut all ties with him. We all make choices in life and I chose me.
@LHydro
@LHydro 4 ай бұрын
I hope we are neighbors ❤🌵 this was on point, thank you 🪴
@digitaldorothy
@digitaldorothy 3 ай бұрын
“… breadcrumbs … I feel right at home.” A hard truth to swallow when you realize what’s happening.
@ArandomLuLu
@ArandomLuLu 4 ай бұрын
Oh sweet gosh darn home Alabama..... why in the world did i relate to this so much.. 😭
@BeTheChange99
@BeTheChange99 4 ай бұрын
Ooooof the very first one example is me. My father would change moods quickly and now I read every tone and word of my partner and push and push to find out what's wrong. But I'm also extremely self conscious of my partner noticing anything that he may not agree to or has criticized in the past... so the tone changes make me question everything
@saraht282
@saraht282 3 ай бұрын
Oh good grief you have just explained me and my whole life!!!!
@JIMKOR
@JIMKOR 4 ай бұрын
I have literally sobbed when I received compliments as a kid and even in my teens. Because I couldn’t figure out why my mom couldn’t see what others saw in me. Even now I just think ppl Are just being nice and I don’t deserve the compliment
@angelika87
@angelika87 4 ай бұрын
when someone gives me a sincere compliment i hold back tears
@bottomofastairwell
@bottomofastairwell 4 ай бұрын
youtube really gotta stop calling me out like this at 5 am
@jessb465
@jessb465 2 ай бұрын
Seriously, now… 😳 I’m gonna need you two to get the hell outta my head. Just, wow. Found a gem stumbling upon your channel. ❤
@BooDotBoo
@BooDotBoo 2 ай бұрын
Woo, this was me. Hardcore. Sometimes, still is, but therapy has helped so much, thank goodness!
@evasccl7846
@evasccl7846 3 ай бұрын
I believe this needs to change once and for all! irrespective of how your parents have been with you... you have it in your hand to do better, to be better and it starts with yourself.Choose good!
@katemsmith1011
@katemsmith1011 3 ай бұрын
been watching your videos all day and can relate to just about all of them but this one hits home in more ways than one
@marysullivan3881
@marysullivan3881 3 ай бұрын
This is all so true. If someone says I love you, I don't believe it. They were only words that didn't match actions. I constantly think about what could go wrong and how I can avoid/mitigate damage.
@Gracee710
@Gracee710 4 ай бұрын
Huh... I just found this channel and I've been going through the most recent videos... My mom is like this. Thanks for helping me realize!
@Mashup-l7y
@Mashup-l7y 4 ай бұрын
Woah😳 spot on across the board😳
@FlowerFriend02
@FlowerFriend02 4 ай бұрын
The last one hits home. I was in love with this girl, and when she liked me back, I was disgusted because I thought “who would like a disgusting person like myself?” Thanks mom and dad
@yinze0089
@yinze0089 4 ай бұрын
Thanks to you ladies, I understand more and more about myself.
@Styvyn1
@Styvyn1 2 ай бұрын
It really sucks life was tough. But it is nice to know that I am not alone with these feelings
@slimshany4602
@slimshany4602 3 ай бұрын
Wonderful shorts 🌟 great way to gain some insight and support for many I reckon. 👍❤
@memd9818
@memd9818 4 ай бұрын
You guys really help people to understand what 'it', whatever 'it' is for people, looks like. Brilliant job!! ..but more importantly, thank you.
@Ottolineification
@Ottolineification 4 ай бұрын
I watch these videos, recognise symptoms of “trauma” that I had… and then desperately try to remember the trauma, and come up with nothing….
@brookehansen6973
@brookehansen6973 4 ай бұрын
How do you mean? Are you saying you're not exhibiting these symptoms or that you can't remember where these symptoms come from?
@msmltvcktl
@msmltvcktl 4 ай бұрын
I had to 'earn' love; unfortunately, no matter how hard i worked, i never seemed to get paid...
@bennymathew7761
@bennymathew7761 3 ай бұрын
Thanks so much for addressing this issue... I relate to what you are saying...
@cevothy
@cevothy 3 ай бұрын
Everything is so spot on, for example i realise that i wont let myself date till i become perfection itself
@charlablevins474
@charlablevins474 3 ай бұрын
Your shorts are spot on.
@halwaffles
@halwaffles Ай бұрын
Wow some of this is absolutely spot on. I think I’ve been doing better on some of these things but wow…it’s just so…accurate
@lr8424
@lr8424 3 ай бұрын
Best short on YT. Thanks
@robynmorris6388
@robynmorris6388 4 ай бұрын
I love the tree with all the lights!!!
@lindseymca6422
@lindseymca6422 4 ай бұрын
Omg these clips are brilliantly on point..
@s.u.0509
@s.u.0509 4 ай бұрын
Nailed it with every Word you said 🥺
@ariday6875
@ariday6875 3 ай бұрын
Omg…when someone I love gives emotional breadcrumbs I feel right at home …that one hit me hard. So true, it’s been my whole life 😢
@maddydog1234
@maddydog1234 3 ай бұрын
Your videos are so accurate to my childhood and life. Wish it wasn’t the case.
@jenrich111
@jenrich111 4 ай бұрын
these are GOLD Ladies of sarcasm, & FACTS ❤❤❤ may God bless your lives for being so relatable 🙏 😊
@UncleJake81
@UncleJake81 2 ай бұрын
I didn't even know about this but it describes me perfectly I'm blown away
@marijnem.5820
@marijnem.5820 4 ай бұрын
Goodness me, this is so spot on...
@InnaWersjaciebie
@InnaWersjaciebie 4 ай бұрын
the last one about sabotaging the relationship is so true
@MusicLoverGurl
@MusicLoverGurl 4 ай бұрын
Wow. This is sure a brick to my face. I knew my parents fucked me up, but I...didn't know how.
@BerriBerriLunchbox
@BerriBerriLunchbox 4 ай бұрын
I have an emotionally unavailable family except for my sister who I'm honestly protecting with my whole life rn I hope she stays kind That's all I can hope for
@Fytrzaczek21
@Fytrzaczek21 4 ай бұрын
I have a very smart and successful brother. My parents didn't compare us, but I did. A lot. And still do
@tcb3901
@tcb3901 4 ай бұрын
These really hit hard every time
@pdubs1408
@pdubs1408 4 ай бұрын
This literally Literally happened to me 3 months ago. 7 years gone over a weekend.
@SongsbyCharleneApril
@SongsbyCharleneApril 4 ай бұрын
This is exactly ME! I am the product of emotionally unavailable parents.😑 Being aware of these traits (and the causes), is half the battle. I can work on recognizing these traits when they arise and correct them by thinking differently…giving myself the space to be imperfect, and space to be loved.
@ihcnutchi
@ihcnutchi 4 ай бұрын
Getting awkward and making self deprecating joke after getting a compliment hits home 😂 Omg don't forget falling head over heals over emotional breadcrumbs!
@jermainamburayan580
@jermainamburayan580 3 ай бұрын
Thats me as well. I became a people pleaser and would go out of the way to help people just so they will like me.
@pidgeeee
@pidgeeee 2 ай бұрын
this the most relatable one fr
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