I was never a child. I allow myself to be one now. It helps me to heal.
@karenbenz57 Жыл бұрын
Me too❤
@flying_like_a_heroine Жыл бұрын
Me 3 ❤
@healthymind7419 Жыл бұрын
Me 4
@myfuturepuglife Жыл бұрын
Exactly. Same. ❤🩹❤🧡💛💚💙💜
@kimsellers4137 Жыл бұрын
Same 🙏🕊💖
@SanGreal-Hanna Жыл бұрын
A healthy empath is “of service” for others. An unhealthy empathy is a “people pleaser” to others.
@katherinel1801 Жыл бұрын
I was with you until you got to Harry. She’s a narcissist. He’s a mess. He’s not in the slightest bit happy.
@nataliejune84 Жыл бұрын
Yes
@staciemarie5859 Жыл бұрын
Well said!
@orgesarizeybek1 Жыл бұрын
Very well explained❤❤❤
@drijkens Жыл бұрын
Well said ❤
@aaronloewen87189 ай бұрын
Don't forget that being an empath is a gift and a privilege that not everyone has. I would rather be one than not. It is the challenge and responsibility of empaths to harness that gift. I'm working on that too :)
@Luxiouriousprettyme8 ай бұрын
it is also truly gift. i believe this.
@janicechiaretto70828 ай бұрын
Sometimes yes. It cam get in the way too.
@robertahoffmann88208 ай бұрын
Yes I agree with you! I think at age 67... I'm done with narcissists (finally) and earned strength and independence along the way! Wish I knew of this connection(empath/narcissist) when I was young!! However, I am proud I am kind, compassionate and caring to people/animals/earth. I think I've been able to help rather than hurt given my time on earth.
@gitteholm19207 ай бұрын
@@Luxiouriousprettyme Yes but I get the fact that sometimes it is not good to feel too much and to loose your focus.:-)
@vlovksy17 ай бұрын
My opinion is different, being an empath myself, it doesn't do anyone any real good. The help you can provide others it's no more than an aspirin, it won't do any real change in their lives until they make the change for themselves. For the empath, it's giving and draining your energy towards others for free not getting anything in return except for a pat at your ego.
@FeeFeeRN Жыл бұрын
Has anyone else been an empath and people pleaser for so long that they aren’t even sure who you are in order to individuate?
@BrokenMinister9 ай бұрын
Im the one... My late mother was narcist and I was her first born. She mutilated me mentally, destroyed my self esteem, distorded my selfimage. I pleased her, I did everything for her, but I was never good enough. All the others were better than me. She compared me with everything and always named a winner ...who was not me. All along that fucked up growing I lost myself...I am NOTHING All I think what others think about me...I never feel like number 1 about my self...their needs come first...then I lick the floor and hear their laughter...
@rubylicious10249 ай бұрын
yeah🤔 I'm not sure it was that, so yes and no😆.. 🤔😬 don't know if it even makes sense, to others, but It's like I drowned in it, and then I got lost.. (think I might have made it worse, more of an afterthought but probably did alienate myself more.. so got harder to find, like a type of ground to stand on, to even feel like you fit anywhere.. well, as a side-note, I still don't fit😆, but think it's different.. like most things "it depends", but think it's harder those times, like for example... when you can feel the tension/atmosphere in a room, but no one seem to notice or react to it, sometimes it gets so disturbingly uncomfortable, so people start to weird me out😂) to just knowing who we are and being our authentic selves (or a part of it.. with our differences, experience and how we manage to deal with it, and all what our lives throws at us, also plays it's parts..) think it can be hard in general, so when our feelings mixes with others, it probably adds on to it.. don't know if it is like that... but think our world is more shallow, superficial and materialistic, as well as many of the residents in it, so it might be harder to know and find out those things too!?
@samanthajones52119 ай бұрын
🙋🏽♀️
@youneedjesus56629 ай бұрын
Use being an empath to your favor. See that other people are going through changes too, and they can be big or small but they are CHANGES, so when you understand that you can stay relaxed in your ownself not trying to help, not trying to UNDERSTAD what they are feeling or what is the big problem they are confronting. Just observe in a general manner and focus on you, you naturally will feel more comfortable in your skin.. Try a lot of new things involving different areas of life, arts, letters, numbers..etc Always think positive but do not force those positive thoughts when you are feeling stressed, that only will make the problem worse Have a nice life stranger
@aliveisthevibration90369 ай бұрын
im trying to be 24 hours ahead we dont remember five minutes ago sooooo just be just breathe focus that thousands of bubbles withing bubbles think that the whole hemisphere has toilet paper supper music sex so werlds within werlds
@Johny40Se7en11 ай бұрын
Best tip for any genuine empaths out there - Stay off "social" media. Seriously! You'll get caught up in a loop of caring about SO many things, often things which are out of your control, meaning you have little to zero influence in affecting, and you'll just burn yourself out. It's not to say stop caring and being aware of such things, just put your empathy in the right place where it matters most. Especially where it matters most to others, and I don't just mean other Human people...
@pietra347611 ай бұрын
YES!! This comment should be everywhere.
@justinasalma319810 ай бұрын
Yessss, thanks for the advice , thats one of my goals of 2024 !!!!
@clairecarscallen10 ай бұрын
So wise. Thank you for the reminder to keep going in that direction. I just wish I had discovered videos about empaths and narcissists MUCH earlier in life. Not much time left to enjoy life even if I DO heal! 🥺
@Johny40Se7en10 ай бұрын
@@clairecarscallen Sounds like you have guilt. Guilt's a useless emotion that doesn't often do anything productive, so just learn from the past mistakes as best you can and move on. No one's gonna do it for you. All the best 👍🙂
@Sally15010 ай бұрын
Most people who think they are empaths are NOT EVEN CLOSE. There are narcissists who say they are empaths.
@ryderstarlight4516 ай бұрын
I've always harbored a profound desire to play a significant role in humanity's greatest endeavors, aiming to exert a positive influence, uncover the keys to optimal well-being, and ensure safety for all. This enduring need for acknowledgment stems not from vanity or excess, but from a deep sense of purpose and identity. I possess an insatiable curiosity to explore the intricacies of human understanding, pursuing knowledge typically reserved for a privileged few. My goal is to embody the wisdom our ancestors hoped we would achieve.
@MichaelLuisi6 ай бұрын
Experiencing these emotions is entirely natural; they are an essential aspect of the human experience, and it's important to trust in your journey. For those in search of deeper understanding, joining the Illuminatus can offer enlightenment and more. Despite its mystical reputation, there are authentic methods to become a member and delve into its mysteries.
@ryderstarlight4516 ай бұрын
Certainly! "Hmm, so you're saying it's possible for me to join? I always assumed it was only open to individuals from certain financial backgrounds."
@MichaelLuisi6 ай бұрын
Certainly, that perspective is deliberate; it's the narrative they want to convey. By exploring Radiant Reservation in more depth, you'll gain a more thorough understanding, improved clarity, and access to exclusive organization
@MichaelLuisi6 ай бұрын
Undoubtedly, anyone earnestly seeking true Enlightenment, unfathomable influence, boundless wealth, radiant health and vitality, and the ancient secrets shrouding our world would find themselves irresistibly drawn to the illustrious Illuminatus organization.
@ryderstarlight4516 ай бұрын
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@thelotusexperience6683 Жыл бұрын
A healed Empath is not a people pleaser they have boundaries
@borboletalila7 ай бұрын
yes. I am not a people pleaser, though I am an empath. I have become my own self by rebelling and going against patterns imposed to me.
@ginajones23286 ай бұрын
I have boundaries now but for sooo long I felt SoS save ones self and I became lost still in helping others and In the NOW I have a heart to help but not too linger long around people with Victim mentality
@bronwenmeyers545610 күн бұрын
Boundaries are difficult for people to learn. I've recently learned boundaries are for ourselves not others. I was applying then incorrectly for a long time.
@violettubb9405 Жыл бұрын
The narcissist and the empath both have the same core wound of abandonment. Great point! Thank you.
@robinmorrow9023 Жыл бұрын
Exactly! And the difference is one of them loves to help others, and is selfless. The other one love’s to hurt others and is selfish!
@allmic101 Жыл бұрын
@@robinmorrow9023 A narcissist finding an empath is the greatest gift they could ever receive, a empath being found by a narcissist is the worst fate they could be given.
@jeniapustilnik567 Жыл бұрын
this is not neccesarly true empaths are usually people who got bullied because of lack of mothers love narricists usually got builled by their dad verbally and phsically im also an empath atlist i consider myself to be one i also used to please people than after solving the root cause i only want to help people without getting anything back because it makes me feel good
@robinmorrow9023 Жыл бұрын
@@allmic101 You’re exactly right!
@itzablackcat Жыл бұрын
@@jeniapustilnik567sounds to me that's lack of fathers love 🙄 some mothers can be verbally/physically abusive too. it's called child abuse/neglect. how petty you are to make it about gender
@stanisawruchaa818610 ай бұрын
- Is who you are in your life who you are meant to be? Answer: I don't know who I am meant to be. - Whose expectations are you fulfilling? Answer: I don't know what my expectations are. - Are the things you do each day things that make you happy? Answer: I don't know what makes me happy. This video showed me that I don't know absolutely anything about myself.
@Thirdeye_therapy7 ай бұрын
Meditation gives answers Be blessed by the divine ✨️
@marlenelindsey76387 ай бұрын
Just sit with yourself what makes you happy do that everyday for a while. What do you like? Make a list I like flowers etc. What qualities about myself do I like? Stay in prayer and be guided by the Holy Spirit. Have fun getting to know yourself!
@arianna65217 ай бұрын
I would highly suggest going to a Codependence Anonymous meeting. Also, read Facing Codependence by Pia Mellody.
@pr3ttiad28511 ай бұрын
Was an empath until I consistently came across narcissists as friends and significant others , and I had to literally drop everyone and everything in order to get my energy back to normal.
@celestemetcalfe352710 ай бұрын
I have gone through this to clean my heart of what I “felt” was false …..against my intuitive connection so I was left with 2 people in my life….i mama have felt sad and angry at first but never regretfully sad , anger yes anger was very deeply internalised 14 months later I have had WITHOUT ANY DOUBTS A PHENOMENAL brain explosion and I’m ready for the universe within to out and visa versa as I have elevated so often in my life to see…and feel and fly into a state of absolutely zero mental connection with the body or brain all the way into nothingness 💚 No 🧠 thinking exists there it’s another somewhere I just don’t know where yet or even if it’s a where at all But I’ll say it Thinking does not happen there at you just be light
@nomadicbydesign010 ай бұрын
I've done something similar, but when I get back into contact with new people, that's when it shows me there is still alot of healing to be done.
@carolynbuls47379 ай бұрын
I’m in the same boat I am literally friendless and husband less. I have faith there’s a reason for this and my tribe will find me
@mahmoodabdulbaqi8249 ай бұрын
the world is a mirror, only ego can see ego.
@JustMyNterputation9 ай бұрын
Omg! I totally feel like that is where I am at right now. Having to reset in a different state. I think that is the only way I can stay focused on myself.
@indigorose1270 Жыл бұрын
Finally out of the people pleaser stage. I'm a introvert. But now I stand up for myself. And put my needs first. 😊
@passionateforjesus401911 ай бұрын
Same here
@86jessica111 ай бұрын
I feel you.
@deerheart8711 ай бұрын
Me too and it's so hard
@katherinawarren152311 ай бұрын
‘Finally’ right. Took me 60 yrs.
@DebbieJuneman-c5u11 ай бұрын
Me exactly
@inspired2rv66110 ай бұрын
Eventually, when you really discover who you are, at your core, at your essence, nothing in the world makes you happy. You exude happiness, peace, and joy, by being in the presence of your essence. Peace and bliss flow through you. It’s a journey, a beautiful and at times challenging journey.❤ thanks Aaron, for helping us work through it🙏🏻
@christineplaton30487 ай бұрын
It's true that feelings can be set aside. Reactions can be controlled. Nothing matters. It's a neutrality. It's not available all the time. Learning curve. Energy isn't felt all the time. Sometimes.
@Julie-netball6 ай бұрын
Although I agree with you, you put nothing makes you happy. Do you mean nothing external? I feel finding inner peace makes me feel happy with all outside situations. Joy is in everything. Everything is easier. I'm sorry if I have misinterpreted this. Xxx
@inspired2rv6616 ай бұрын
@@Julie-netball infinite perceptions on this subject, no wrong answer. I’ll attempt to elaborate mine. True happiness is from within. It’s in the silent stillness and once I became aware of that source of infinite love, I am able to choose it in every moment. Food tastes better, the body feels alive and rejuvenated, all the senses are enhanced and gratitude is felt more deeply allowing a deep enjoyment and appreciation of all things. Flow, clarity and harmony expands in the day to day tasks. Vibrant joy. It seems all challenges invite us to let go and find this awareness within if only we accept the present moment as it without fear and judgment. It’s a personal journey. 🙏🏻💕✨
@HarpMuse Жыл бұрын
This makes so much sense. When I was in my 20's, my boyfriend at the time said in the middle of the night one night I sat straight up and yelled, "Who am I?" I never really understood why i did that. Now it makes sense. 30 years later and I'm still exploring who I am. My parents also wanted me to get a "real" job to be financially secure and safe, so I did high level administrative work for international companies for a couple of decades. I remember thinking, "if this is all there is to life, I hope it's a short one." I finally let go of their beliefs and have been working as a successful self-employed musician for the past 15 years.
@Barbinez11 Жыл бұрын
That’s beautiful!
@HarpMuse Жыл бұрын
@@Barbinez11 Thank you!
@86oldbehave Жыл бұрын
You have no idea how much joy reading your comment makes me! And the harp… such a beautiful instrument
@HarpMuse Жыл бұрын
@@86oldbehave 💖💖💖
@NiniRockX Жыл бұрын
Do what you love and love what you do.
@jennifervogt2932 Жыл бұрын
I’m an empath and I feel people’s energy but I used to people please and go out of my way. Once I awakened I don’t do that anymore. Once I could read people, I knew their intentions. I could tell who was being authentic and who wasn’t. I let those people go. I no longer need anyone’s validation but I’m still an empath and I can still feel people’s energy. That has not changed. I just tell those people to fuck off now. Lol 😂
@tommycoyote3258 Жыл бұрын
Same here.😂
@cabazoncabazon5952 Жыл бұрын
Same and it feels damn good ❤
@catherineglassman Жыл бұрын
This!!!!
@eh4918 Жыл бұрын
@@a.s6841I feel like you should write fortune cookies with that perspective of yours🍪...
@eh4918 Жыл бұрын
I appreciate this insight 🙏
@sfuterfas9 ай бұрын
Empaths and narcissists are two sides of the same coin. They just either use their power for good or evil. Being a good empath people pleaser is a detriment to ourselves though.
@davinathedivine2 ай бұрын
I’d rather be the people pleaser, empath than a narcissist empath
@katja633211 ай бұрын
It's always hard to observe when super nice people start learning growing healthy boundaries, how hostile the environment judges them. As a coach I observed that a hundred times and I always prepare them in front. I will tell them, many people will try to guilt trip you, play emotional drama on you just because you imply healthy boundaries. Don't worry about it. But be prepared for its getting worse before you get your respect. Stick to it and after some weeks, people will change towards you. And watch out for the rare people who are cheering for you finally having a voice! Stay with them.
@Luxiouriousprettyme8 ай бұрын
and others will fall away
@JenniferSmith-mp6bs8 ай бұрын
It was explained to me like you are wearing this white flowing gown or cloak going into the light of healing and healthy boundaries and the toxic relationships are grabbing that gown/cloak and dont want you to leave them and want to pull you back and we might be tempted to try to pull them along with us. The toxic relationships will be the ones harshly rejecting your boundaries the relationships worth keeping Will respect your new boundaries. Cut the ties with anyone trying to hold you back. Detach with love.
@jakespencer67818 ай бұрын
This is my exact thing, I'm inside a black box and it's scary to venture out of it, therapy is helping
@elnoawilson1018 ай бұрын
Amen
@lionheart65188 ай бұрын
So right, most will fall away at the slightest boundary... you can be super soft and well spoken about it but energy doesnt lie, they feel there is a boundary and thats not fun or too confrontational.@africanprincessmaya
@sugarraynay4153 Жыл бұрын
I’ve been that people pleaser most of my life,, to the point I made myself literally sick ,,, learn to say NO!!! Learn to speak UP!!! Learn to be YOU! Stop being a doormat , pick yourself up, I love being so empowered in the world, within myself!!! REMEMBER YOUR IDENTITY❤️
@Clevelandsteamer324 Жыл бұрын
Yes. Empaths are always tired .
@morgan.greene11 ай бұрын
@@Clevelandsteamer324I was ALWAYS exhausted and never knew why.
@Boi33-mc4hs11 ай бұрын
Yes 🎉this ❤😊
@annchovey208911 ай бұрын
If I sense people are manipulating me to do something, I give myself permission to dismiss them. Actions should be from the heart and not manipulation.
@deeznuts314511 ай бұрын
All easier said then done. Remember there are people out there that have had a lot more trauma than you. You have no clue what someone else might be dealing with.
@Zotnamm10 ай бұрын
he's basically explaining what happens when youre in the wrong place in your family system (Translated this word from Dutch) : the natural flow of energy (from parents to children) is disrupted and life becomes a struggle. I'm reading a book on this subject and I'm 17
@PreYeah9 ай бұрын
@Zotnamm - Reading your comment has made me very intrigued on this book that you mentioned about the natural flow of energy being disrupted from parents to children. I'd be curious to know the name of this book as I'm realizing my own parents were very expertly (but covertly) disruptive, intrusive, and made themselves a general nuisance in my upbringing. I was never allowed to have peace and have always felt a constant sense of obligation toward them (it's also why I have trouble maintaining that flow of energy because I'm used to it always being disrupted so the point that I associate "natural flow" with "impending doom"). I'd be very grateful if you could let me know this book. It feels like something I need to read myself!
@Zotnamm9 ай бұрын
@@PreYeah It’s originally a Dutch book. The English version is called: The Fountain, find your place, by Els van Steijn
@Nubian_Queen14 ай бұрын
@@Zotnamm Thank you for the title, will check this book out, you are already spiritually enlightened 🙏🏾
@tinkingtinking21344 ай бұрын
I wouldn't say im in the wrong place in my family system now because I've awakened to why im where I am now. Once you know why you are where you are you know you are the gift to your family, the blessed one because I escaped from it, whereas my sisters are still being manipulated and emotionally abused by our father which is the role they chose to play in the family. I'm free, I don't have to put on an act to please him, im the truth teller and truth seeker, The Chosen One. It's not easy, but it wasn't ment to be, i chose that, but you can't ascend if you don't go through the struggles or as I call them the levels of consciousness so I can have the experiences and see them from a more enlightened perspective, not a victim perspective anymore. ❤
@MayaLove197611 ай бұрын
Psychologists call this “fawning” it’s a thing. I’m 47 and took me this long to truly learn this and shift it. I’m an empath and my sister a narcissist. Both our parents are wounded and not emotionally available so abandoned from day one. It’s amazing how far Spiritual awareness and psychology has come in the last 20 years. Being on a healing journey now for 18 years this has all only come to light in the last few, since 2020 really…
@thedolphin542811 ай бұрын
You really should stop classifying people according to just one trait they have..
@STRATO0511 ай бұрын
I can relate. Like you, empath and narcissist sister. Difficult to maneuver, but possible to do.
@lmc237511 ай бұрын
I think the score of how it is, has been known much longer than 20. Jung knew full well what was what and he has been deceased since 1961. Besides, neg energy emitted, can only attract same. Being a people pleaser is neg. energy, being a narcissist (deeply wounded, carrying their unresolved pain) is also neg. energy. Without forgiveness and unconditional love, life will be a struggle. One can only be loved by another at the same level of love they hold for self. Why? Bc it is all energy. Lower vibe attracts same. Want different, then one has to find higher self mode, the higher vibration. If one doesn't see their own self worth, no one else will see it either - guaranteed. Be more to self to get more.
@jameslove-vani79711 ай бұрын
Reminds me of kids books. Monolithic thinking, like "Gary the grocer lives next to Barry the Barber." @@thedolphin5428
@JoseRRodriguez11 ай бұрын
@@thedolphin5428 You really should stop assuming an entire behaviour from a comment explaining a specific thing
@jenniferlauter552311 ай бұрын
I’m an empath, and I have never heard it explained as precisely as you have. You have no idea how impactful this video is for me. Thank you!
@edwigeguerin89410 ай бұрын
Same here ❤
@NeoXSpirit10 ай бұрын
you'll feel what you sow, darkness
@carolynbuls47379 ай бұрын
Yes me too! Thank you
@robertahoffmann88208 ай бұрын
agreeeeee!!!!
@docusi267410 ай бұрын
When you don’t people please you get labeled as “hostile and aggressive “
@michiganexpat52259 ай бұрын
Exactly; people say stuff like that to try and manipulate you.
@synesthesiafilms8 ай бұрын
A bully, a teacher, a dogmatist, narcs pull all strings once you stop pleasing them and play the little puppy with big eyes, worshipping their grandiosity. NO!
@CristinaRodriguez-ci5ng8 ай бұрын
😂
@b.d.69638 ай бұрын
Absolutely true ...thank you for confirming my thoughts
@b.d.69638 ай бұрын
I feel so blessed for stumbling onto this page....I never lacked attention because I never got any as a child and I do not seek attention never liked a crowd I'm a home body and rather be alone to not feel others negative energy and thought I could feel.mine expectations are mine now
@teresafraser3049 Жыл бұрын
The BEST spiritual teachers are the ones who experienced deep inner child wounding so they can empathize completely ❤
@varvarajoannou7715 Жыл бұрын
Hell no that ain't necessary why are we conditioned to believe that we only evolve through suffering and hardship ? The best healers are those who grew up in a healthy respectful environment filled with love
@ninetta_k Жыл бұрын
It's like "takes one to understand one" just like best addiction counselors are recovering addicts themselves.. yes others can be all that too but it's almost like you have to really experience and feel it..text books only get u so far, unfortunately actually have lived thru that pain only then you really understand..❤
@ritanelson8879 Жыл бұрын
The best teacher is the one that teaches you, touches your specific issues. Makes sense to you. No one else. Resonates with you.
@ISATŌP1 Жыл бұрын
Wrong!! The best Spiritual Teachers DO NOT CARE ABOUT YOUR ILLUSIONS(the past). The best Spiritual Teachers help you to Acknowledge and Accept God Consciousness AS THE VERY LIFE OF YOUR BEING!!(Like Krishna, Buddha and Jesus did before their teachings were misinterpreted by human intellect and made into religions of Duality(or Non-Powers)!!! A Spiritual teacher that focuses on anything but this PRINCIPLE is simply leading you down the road of ignorance!!
@ISATŌP1 Жыл бұрын
@@varvarajoannou7715Nope!! Think again..... But before you can answer this properly you must know the NATURE OF GOD.....Do you know the Nature of God??
@NashvilleNative-0 Жыл бұрын
what I say is that the empath has to learn to exude their own energy to overcome totally absorbing others' energy. That's what an empath has to do to take on leadership roles.
@prisillaspace11 ай бұрын
This IS true! I’m just learning this! I’m 48 now and I’m completely being myself and the funny thing (not so funny), it keeps people away. I’ve been told I exude sincerity and compassion…. Then I think about what happened to Jesus. ❤️🔥❤️🔥❤️🔥❤️🔥❤️🔥
@elizabethl618711 ай бұрын
I don’t mind trying to set a holiday tone when everyone is doing last-minute shopping. But every day? It’s fake and exhausting. I’m not (edit: good) at it.
@katherinawarren152311 ай бұрын
That makes sense. People pleasing was a survival mode so it feels threatening when one first starts to respect themselves vs people pleasing. Worth it though.
@tashastarling65737 ай бұрын
@@prisillaspace being strong keeps people away? More like weakness attracts people. It's better to have peace and be a good example to others. People who can take advantage of me... I realized they feel it's acceptable BECAUSE they are able to do it. They didn't respect me for it.
@exiledgoomba5 ай бұрын
@@tashastarling6573 well said. I want to work on being an example and a role model instead of just going with the flow and doing things I'm not as proud of. It's a hard paradigm to shift
@redbhdfw1047 ай бұрын
Yes, being an empath is the result of unmet childhood needs, being an under-individuated adult child, and a lack of boundaries. Once I confronted the countless ways I was abandoned by my primary caregivers and processed the grief stemming from that (took years), I learned healthy boundaries and eventually self-care and individuation.
@arianna65217 ай бұрын
Love your response! I have learned we carry on what our parents instilled. We still self-abandon at times.
@keh47006 ай бұрын
Same.
@hannahellstrom11 ай бұрын
My body had to take a 1 hour nap after watching this eye opening video! I have never before been able to lay on the couch and allow myself to take a nap..this was the first time in 36 years on this planet🌍 Wow, and thank you for doing the job you are here to do❤
@moniLaute11 ай бұрын
enjoy your new napping 💖
@Jopeteus310 ай бұрын
Its a nice feeling, peace within. (:
@christinewaddell10 ай бұрын
You're leaving fight, flight or freeze mode... I slept for a year! ❤ It's nice when you begin to understand you're safe, you're okay and you're exactly where you need to be!🫂 Blessings to you friend!
@702Hardcafe9 ай бұрын
Wow. That's amazing. I can go a month without a nap but when I finally get one it's so so nice. Hope you're still getting one in when you can.
@jawnaraestokes58368 ай бұрын
This is so Me. I have been a people pleaser, especially for my parents. I walked on egg shells to be sure everything stayed peaceful. I am a Mother of 3 amazing young men. I am about to be 43 years old. I finally saw, thanks to a good friend, that I needed to get away from my parents. I am surely stuck partially in childhood.
@queeniecc6262 Жыл бұрын
Jesus Aaron - this is me 100%. I am an only child, and lived with super narcissistic and alcoholic parents. I moved away and got my life in order for 25 years. My awful Mother has been sucking my energy since December of 2022 because she is sick and alone. I am going to have to listen to this again and again.
@Blue24Osprey Жыл бұрын
Put yourself first - don't let the parasite control you again. Only help at your own convenience - you'll get no thanks for self sacrifice and being used again.
@queeniecc6262 Жыл бұрын
@@Blue24Osprey so true - just because someone gives birth to you doesn't mean you owe them forever. You are spot on.
@nana8135 Жыл бұрын
❤❤
@chrissylove11110 Жыл бұрын
We can love people from far away. 😌
@Bronte866 Жыл бұрын
She made a conscious, deliberate choice to be abusive toward you at the time you most needed a real mother. She didn’t do “the best she could.” This is a crime against all of humanity, a serious bad decision. People need support to break away from these very spiritually sick people. Do this or regret it bitterly. I have no patience with people who abused their little children. Sending love & support.
@ElzaMusic10 ай бұрын
I'm blown away by how clearly you shared what I grappled with severely in my 20's. I remember having no idea at all of who I was or any sense of identity ...not being in my own body...feeling uncomfortable in my own skin and always looking outside of myself and tuning into the emotional state of those around me to get who I needed to be for everyone else to be ok and not even knowing how to ask myself what do I want? And what do I NOT want! Individuation...brilliant...enough said!
@adriamaral30011 ай бұрын
I am an Empath, but I have never felt out of my confident frame. I do not force anything or change for anyone. I resonate with those that allow me to be me. I am aware of others energetic field and choose to be kind to everyone so long as they are present and authentic.
@patriciameuffels5388 ай бұрын
Same here You can be an empaths and be confident
@anic58058 ай бұрын
Don't interactions/ relationships with others inspire you to grow toward a better version of yourself? And would that not be considered changing? I, too, resonate strongly with those who allow me to be me, yet sometimes disappoint myself with doing too much for others when in their environment and out of balance/ in need of attention, thus losing time/ putting myself out of balance. Your statement, "I have never felt out of my confident frame" is impressive and somewhat incredible... as in, never since realizing your an empath or never since first memories of childhood? NEVER is a strong word🙏🏻
@ThtGirlElle Жыл бұрын
I’m an Empath to the core. I feel everything and lately it has been so incredibly painful I have being to dissociate from living - an empty shell watching this body from the outside looking in. Thank you for this message ❤
@SA-px3ln Жыл бұрын
Me too so you suffer from anxiety depression I do still have toxic family trauma bond. Why can’t we let go
@nana8135 Жыл бұрын
❤❤
@youcancallmesteph Жыл бұрын
I have too on the really difficult days.. you’re not alone 🩵 we’re living in really difficult times right now.
@youcancallmesteph Жыл бұрын
@@SA-px3lnbecause we believe they’ll change. We think because they’re family, that they should treat us how we deserve - but they don’t.
@SA-px3ln Жыл бұрын
@@youcancallmesteph so what did you do release the ties attachment?
@Amber-vz8rn7 ай бұрын
I have 2 kids one is very compassionate and I believe he is an empath and one is a narcissist the narcissistic child’s big influence was my mother the narcissist my empathy child’s main influence was me the empath I currently live with the narcissist because the other child is a marine and is stationed I’ve always wanted an understanding of everything and the answers to life because it’s so hard for me to understand others and why they are the way they are thank u for helping me to have a better understanding I’m starting to realize I need to understand myself in order to have the answers I need
@mettethemsen1443 Жыл бұрын
I was born sensitive and feel I have my empathy from that and not childhood trauma. It makes me able to connect and understand others deeply and Connect with Nature and animals 🫶 I don’t want a cure for that, I think in general the world needs more empathy, love and understanding. I do however see hightened empathy combined with trauma can lead to unhealthy people pleasing tendencies and THAT I’m working with - I call myself a renovering people pleaser 😆
@thegoddesswithin8859 Жыл бұрын
I agree with this. I was sensitive and empathic to nature and animals from the start of my life too. I don't want to lose that and the world does need more of it. But I do have a degree of empathy that comes from hypervigilance attached to childhood trauma. They are two different parts of the same psyche. One is positive and healthy. And one comes more from the shadow. Both serve their own function. Neither is right or wrong, depending on how and why it is used. They just are. The rest is up to me. I think it's important to check in with yourself on the regular and note intention. Awareness is everything. I see you. 🙏
@LaciRae Жыл бұрын
i feel the same way. are You guys an INFP/INFJ?
@mettethemsen1443 Жыл бұрын
@@thegoddesswithin8859 Thank you for that lovely answer, I totally agree with you - and Thank you for seeing me
@mettethemsen1443 Жыл бұрын
@@LaciRae yes INFP 🫶
@thegoddesswithin8859 Жыл бұрын
I'm INFJ.
@freqgirl Жыл бұрын
Aaron, you totally hit the nail on the head. You described me as a child to a T! Mom and dad are dead now. I totally changed after my mom died. She was the most critical person in my life. I wish I wouldn't have waited for her to pass in order to let myself grow. However, it is never too late to do this. You are never too old to change.
@MayaLove197611 ай бұрын
I’ve heard this from many people. The chains of family contracts and bonds are so strong hey. My parents in their 70’s now and I’m still trying to break them before they die as I know they will then but don’t want to be waiting for that.
@sicaz52710 ай бұрын
The part about feeling unsafe and constantly tuning and morphing not only resonated but transported me back to specific and hard times in my life.
@CapSunLeoMoon Жыл бұрын
Aaron thank you! I’m an empath- severe depression/anxiety. I’m healing my childhood so I can get through life 🙏🏼❤️
@VivBeyer1111 Жыл бұрын
I wish you so much luck, strength and blessings for your journey !!! Much Love!! :)
@CTahoe1 Жыл бұрын
Me too. Thank you for sharing this. Many of us Empaths struggle with severe depression/anxiety. I have been trying to heal from this also. 🙏💜
@CapSunLeoMoon Жыл бұрын
@@CTahoe1 good luck and sending many blessings your way. It is awful! Praying for you!! 🙏🏼🙏🏼
@CapSunLeoMoon Жыл бұрын
@@VivBeyer1111 thank you kindly!! I wish the same for you!! BLESSINGS!!
@snugsaffie8 ай бұрын
Wishing you the best!
@86jessica111 ай бұрын
That makes sense. My mother came down with debilitating depression when I was eight years old, and my whole life became trying to make her happy. Crazy how things in your childhood program your subconscious.
@JoseRRodriguez11 ай бұрын
They are only habits. It is like quit smoking.
@MorgansMemez10 ай бұрын
damn, my mum got really depressed after my dad left and barely left the couch and we only really had potato chips and fast food, etc. she was sleeping all the time. i was probably like 7 or around there, i wonder if thats why i feel the need to clean and do things for other people all the time.
@sloene728 ай бұрын
Yeah similar when my Dad left the Doctor put Mum on a tranquiliser and never told her she could come off it, she never felt better after that day Dad left and she slept all the time, and I took on the role of Mum, for too younger siblings, until I had enough after four years, of looking after her, and went to Dads for a holiday, where I was ignored and allowed to make many of my own choices as he was never around. I remember I felt invisible and like a boarder in his home. I definately was a people pleaser due to the parenting I had
@Aryan111ize7 ай бұрын
i been depressed for years ive always put on a smile what you describing is narcissist manipulation
@katelockhart175310 ай бұрын
As a therapist, I work with this all the time and it is always so exciting to be with and watch someone find their own answers. But how you described this is absolutely beautiful. I don't know what it was that made me click on but as we know, there is nothing random about anything and I have already saved this to listen to later. It's so lovely to find someone explain this without really trying to sell something or foist their 'one size' beliefs ...thanks so much, you are wonderful. x
@ZsasiZen110 ай бұрын
What training do you have in the condition of Empathy? How were you taught to diagnose an Empath? Could you share some of the research you studies? What is your credential, specifically?
@SixtyThreeYearsRawVeganYogini10 ай бұрын
I am very impressed. Finally this high Empath can readily admit to this deep understanding that I wanted my family and everyone to be happy,as in pleased. I became exceediedngly independent and by 13 was earning all my own money while attending school as a top A dtudent. And this perfectionism persisted for the rest of my life,which gratefully has merely just begun...at even 64 years young. Excellent work young Maestro. Thank you.❤
@JamesDean-O10 ай бұрын
Totally agree
@LovexxMuzik10 ай бұрын
Hello fellow mental health worker. I see you, you are awesome, appreciated, and loved! Namaste.
@_YoursTrulyShelby10 ай бұрын
Have a good life as a therapist!
@tamaraeichler Жыл бұрын
"When you individuate you start to grow then you help other people to grow"❤
@darylbutler5044 Жыл бұрын
I don’t see myself as ‘an empath’. I see myself as empathic, meaning I have boundaries, self love and self worth. I do not give 100% of myself because I need a lot of that percentage to function in this world in a healthy way and also to allow others to take responsibility for themselves. So being empathic I can be in tune with others to be able to help them when I am willing and able to.
@WrynnCZ11 ай бұрын
Its hard to master, sincere congratulation. This is also my personal aim, to become balanced "Empathic" person. :)
@dragoszmoartescu551811 ай бұрын
Thank you for making the distinction. It's a very important difference.
@justinasalma319810 ай бұрын
I need to master this as well , thanks for explaining how you cope with being an empath in order to function well ...
@praisethewhiterabbit511211 ай бұрын
Actually, takinig responsibility for other people's emotions has always been an issue for me. Thx for bringing this up, it's really made me reconsider why I feel guilt in the times I shouldn't
@HaroldsLastDate10 ай бұрын
No one is responsible for anyone else's thoughts or feelings, only their own.
@ArcheryRuleZ10 ай бұрын
and does this prevent you from being competitive too? so many times i remember seeing how important it is to someone that they win a game & so i just let them. or else have you seen someone else is getting made fun of and say something dumb (for example) to get that attention off of them /and towards you instead ?
@spongeebobsquaretypants227010 ай бұрын
@@ArcheryRuleZ Yes, especially in sports but specifically when I go to the gym. I cant get myself to be competitive because, I feel like it's flaunting too much from an empathetic viewpoint. I don't want to be the showoff
@facefullofcat10111 ай бұрын
Thank you for covering the maintained victimization/ manipulation of being an empath. I'm an empath but have been uncomfortably aware of (or otherwise denied) how like a narcissist I can be-- similar in ultimate self-centeredness and atomization, only I've been scared, sensitive and self-downplaying instead of demanding. And identified myself as a victim and didn't get out of it. So I appreciate you acknowledging how things are, I think its important for processing and moving through the healing process.
@christabelleblue99018 ай бұрын
This is the realisation I came to also, there can be a combination of both going on, as an empath you can start feeling as though only you can help everyone - the world even, which is almost 'guru' mentality which can turn in egotism/virtue signalling and ultimately narcissism - it's a complex subject!
@redwoods7370 Жыл бұрын
My parents were alcoholics. Being an empath helped me navigate around them. Became a compulsive people pleaser when I was young and it continued into adulthood to get love. Finally I can control that compulsion a little better now that I am an older person. It’s exhausting.
@kathystewart50688 ай бұрын
harry was never going to be king.........but he did individuate, this was a great video, shared with family member
@cherylmccoy660 Жыл бұрын
Being an empath is a gift that most of us were not taught to respect, appreciate and use for its wisdom. We may have been wounded in childhood, but that doesn't mean we are all stuck in childhood. Once we understand our gift, and we're healed the gift can be used with boundaries and wisdom. The gifts do not leave us once we're healed.
@lurdesdeo946210 ай бұрын
Perfectly said! 🙏🧡
@sandycares299511 ай бұрын
A healthy empath is "of service" rather than the term "people pleaser" really helps put things in the right perspective. Its saying " How can I Help". And then helping with your boundaries working with you" maturely. Beautiful experience for both parties.
@vickymintz296 ай бұрын
I was the mediator of my parents' marriage my entire childhood and early adulthood. By the time I was 40 I realized I had become the meditator to most of my friends and eventually it took a toll on my health mentally/physically. One day I decided no longer would I give this service to others and began to put myself first, not in a selfish way but a love for myself and others by not being an enabler. I found that others do nothing about their situation when they allow their sorrows to continue and being an enabler, I really was hurting others rather than helping them. I am no longer an emotional vomit bucket for others and am happier than ever imagined. Of course, I lost some "so called" friends but it was a great relief of not being exposed to constant negative energy and have an enormous positive energy within myself. So many years I wasted on people who had NO intentions on making a personal change, instead I spend valuable time loving life as the gift that was given.
@SatisfiedSoul Жыл бұрын
Thank you so much for this video. My mom devoted all of her time to my little brother when he was born. He have a temper tantrum when he didn’t get what he wanted (he’s a Leo and I’m a Libra) and to this day my mom STILL gives him whatever he needs or wants and I am still told “you can’t do that” “that’s a silly idea” “that makes you look ugly” etc. It has taken me years to realize that no one is going to make me feel safe or whole- I have to do that myself! So thank you, I appreciate your knowledge!🙏🫶🏻💕
@KarolineThePagan Жыл бұрын
What a toxic mother you should leave her
@gratefulkm11 ай бұрын
@@KarolineThePagan You cant, no other biology will release nowhere near the amount of oxytocin that touching your mother does And oxytocin is Love its what attaches you to other biology and helps you forget your emotional trauma, That's why before the Slavers enslaved us we didn't live in separate huts , we stayed together hugging each other all the time So the correct instruction is hug your mum more and then if the answer is we don't like touching each other, then we know the solution and the reason for the situation Which means the remedy and solution cant be explained Biology is not designed to be separated, the Slavers did that, divide and rule the feminine
@june.w.128811 ай бұрын
So sorry to hear that. My mother is much like this, my brother is the golden child and I am a Libra too. I am happy that you managed to find your balance, peace, and happyness.
@7oclockmiracles8811 ай бұрын
Sad thing is most kids can’t step into their selves without demonizing their parents who did the best they could. Seems kindness and empathy are lost in this new age and there is no gift that anyone is giving world by hurting others…lots of maturity needed to do it with grace.
@june.w.128811 ай бұрын
@@7oclockmiracles88 my mother... Maybe she did what she could, but it wasn't that much. She didn't cook, she didn't clean the house. She didn't work. She was always the victim and I had to support her emotionally then financially. Now I am 35. My mother still has dept, even though besides me, her siblings also helped her financially, but still, again, she got into a mess and I have to send her money. And I do, because I do love her, but I can see she will never grow up. Narcissist never grow up properly and take responsibility. She is also codependent and after the divorce with my father, she attached herself to my brother. My brother is now 26, and he has absolutely no friends, never had a girlfriend and lives with my mum. My mother often sabotaged his jobs so to have him with herself 24/7. Only now, when she is more worried about money, she allows him to work. She is not concerned about the future of her kids. She only wants her own needs met. She is not the picture book mother who does everything for her children. Narcissists are different. Not every mother is perfect. My grandmother wasn't perfect either. She was married and cheated on her husband with the Chatolic pastor, who then left the church, married her, and became alcoholic. When she was old, really old, around 80, once when I went to visit her, she was in bed with another, retired pastor. That picture really burned into my retinas. These things are not normal, I think.
@zuziasmr Жыл бұрын
You must have gone through so much healing to get to this point Aaron. I resonate with everything you say, I am empath. I am so proud of you. All my love, XO Zuzi
@lesleybrady39487 ай бұрын
It’s right this! I’m still empathetic naturally, and I’d been a pleaser that long I couldn’t even pinpoint the start. After too many relationships were I totally lost who I was.. I was like f**k this, where am I in all this? Who am I? plant medicine, EMDR and Breathwork therapy I’m now, how do ‘I’ feel in all this? Do I like this person? I still get tripped up but it’s changed everything. It’s a much better reality xxxx
@learnElvish11 ай бұрын
Holy sh*t...I was in tears half way through. This is some of the best therapy I have ever witnessed. God Bless you Aaron.
@Liesel925 Жыл бұрын
Thank you for this video. When I was a kid, my mother had undiagnosed mental illness. Every morning I would lay in bed to feel her energy so I would know what I would be walking into for breakfast. Ironically, I married a man who had a similar situation with his Dad, and he became a narcissist. I tried to please my husband and nothing was ever good enough. I finally walked away after 30 years. I never understood until watching this video. Thank you.
@june.w.128811 ай бұрын
That's so good that you managed to walk away. What helped in making that happen?
@Shay-wl4lx11 ай бұрын
I am also leaving after 30 years. I was too afraid to leave. I've had enough.
@june.w.128811 ай бұрын
@@Shay-wl4lx that's great. I wish you a lot of happyness and peace.
@bebop5410 ай бұрын
😇👍🏼🙏🏼
@firay34358 ай бұрын
My mother is always complaining about her state of being,and I absorb it...Absorb her sadness and madness ,I thought I am weird for that..because I easily start to feel the same emotion as the person.
@tslilbearshoppe98708 ай бұрын
Narcissists shouldn't be allowed to parent.
@bobturano12476 ай бұрын
People don’t know what they are till they look or life beats them into waking up
@elainstill16716 ай бұрын
My mother wanted children so desperately, her words my entire life was "I had children to take care of me" 😡 She is 94 yrs old and is still pissed her children got jobs, left home, married, had children, animals a home and or died. How dare they die on me!" she says.... she is still abusive.
@AnneAlready6 ай бұрын
Sometimes they had narcissist parents themselves and have no idea there is any other way to function. All kids need to know the true worth that is their birthright.
@amandabloom72076 ай бұрын
They don't, they reproduce. With counseling they could parent...
@britney224511 ай бұрын
The inner child comes out to help us through the times when we need it most! Thankful for this!
@constanzeclaudialorenz Жыл бұрын
Now I understand everything. Thank you for the perfect explanation. 💚 No wonder why you feel alone when everybody loves you while you doing what they need.
@ChristineJGold7 ай бұрын
Thanks for sharing I innerstand this now, especially with my sister. Empath & Narcissist, abandoned by dad
@mrobermind Жыл бұрын
Wow I am actually in that individuation process right now without even realizing. It feels like a burning sensation in the pit of my stomach that brings out a primal urge to be who I am, and if someone is trying to make me live the way they think I should live in their minds, Cutting them off becomes an instant.
@nana8135 Жыл бұрын
I definitely understand
@amyhodges5464 Жыл бұрын
This is exactly what I’ve been going through for a few years now ❤
@KeleGel Жыл бұрын
You can use them as mirrors aswell? They show you what you dont like in yourself too.
@activevibrantlife Жыл бұрын
I am in this mode right now as well - its totally enlightening, freeing and a little bit scary. I thought I was becoming a hermit because I cant be bothered with people anymore. Sick to death of them and cutting myself off.
@amyhodges5464 Жыл бұрын
@@activevibrantlife You’ll be in that hermit phase for quite awhile & it’s necessary because you’re able to really discover who you are at your core. Then eventually you’ll come back to other people but you’ll be so grounded in your authenticity, with iron clad boundaries & you’ll be empowered, having let go of all victim mentality. But while you’re in hermit mode, you’ll question it at times and the loneliness will cut deep. So remind yourself it’s not forever & enjoy getting to really know yourself, maybe for the 1st time. Sending ❤️
@aurorealis324911 ай бұрын
Work within - not without! You cannot give to others that which you haven't given to yourself FIRST. If you don't take care of your needs first, it is disingenuous and you will have no longevity in any relationship. Be kind, compassionate and patient with yourself and your will exude these qualities with others as well and set healthy boundaries. Great video.
@GodHelpMe3699 ай бұрын
ENMESHMENT TRAUMA. Enmeshment is a developmental form of trauma where you’re raised in environments where there is blurred, unclear, or a complete lack of boundaries between family members. In cases where enmeshment is present, members often have a difficult time differentiating their own emotions, needs, desires, and issues, from others in the dynamic. If dad is upset, then you are too. “I can’t be ok, if you’re not ok. So I need to fix others to feel safe." There’s excessive over-involvement and over-reliance. This pattern gets hard-wired into your nervous system. Your intimate partnerships start to become chaotic: - lack of identity and sense of self, inability to think for oneself - fawning ("fixing" identity) - people-pleasing - excessive fear of conflict - trouble forming and maintaining healthy relationships - reliance on external validation - over-run by feelings of guilt, shame, and resentment - chronic health issues This creates a massive push/pull dynamic that’s characteristic of a Trauma Bond. Anyone who says “I’m done with relationships” is likely Enmeshed...
@ericmieremet6 ай бұрын
Thank you
@stefanieboeck16 ай бұрын
Wow, thank you.
@msforce96 ай бұрын
Amazing!!👏
@BloodNote5 ай бұрын
This hit hard. ❤
@ashjohn65772 ай бұрын
Thank you for the language 🙏🏿 this gave me needed clarity
@Oouri.0.2.0 Жыл бұрын
it was so draining at school as a kid. literally my energy was not in my body but whole class everyone. i got adhd from then. and avoid tendency to game/music/movie to' have my own space' because i didn't know how to tune off and have myself.
@this-american-mutt Жыл бұрын
I was very lucky. My parents encouraged me to be myself and to never stop learning. To always use critical thinking as well as understanding others. I think both my parents cared so much about helping others is probably the reason I do the things I do now. I have more to say but phone at 2%. Thank you for sharing
@ahartsjourney Жыл бұрын
I grow very tired of the term "empath". it is human nature to feel the energy of other people, its just that many people have lost or ignore this innate ability, being empathetic is the natural state of being a human, but society has made many lose touch with this part of themselves, so the few who have retained this skill are labeled as empathetic or overly sensitive. However with that being said I do appreciate this video and you trying to educate people. Thank you
@juliaz196511 ай бұрын
I'm tired of everyone labeling themself as an empath as well, but wasn't able to articulate what the problem was. thanks for sharing your comment! I agree 100%!
@ahartsjourney11 ай бұрын
np @@juliaz1965
@wanjiwanji9 ай бұрын
This is such a great point... perhaps empathy is a spectrum where some people are more attuned to others while some are not as attuned... but you're so right about empathy being our natural state. I hope more of us allow ourselves to embrace this aspect of our humanity.
@APsGTG9 ай бұрын
@@juliaz1965yeah. The truth is: many seem to be fawning rather than having true “empathy”. Fawning is not empathy. Fawning is a survival mechanism.
@janicechiaretto70828 ай бұрын
Maybe not "empath" but definitely people pleaser. This rings incredibly true.
@BryceBrands11 ай бұрын
I literally couldn’t stop crying watching this , it’s really a challenging path to get understanding of being an empathetic person coming from traditionally Christian family. Being misunderstood feels isolating.
@DavidAKZ11 ай бұрын
Human growth can be lonley.
@susanbrown413711 ай бұрын
You are enough
@occamsrazor732311 ай бұрын
I completely related to your comment
@valerieriggins318411 ай бұрын
Their Soooo Extreme n Fake Trained That Way 💯
@bryanthomas490711 ай бұрын
I feel like American Christianity breeds ppl pleasing.
@milan.8 ай бұрын
Thank you so much for the video
@EleneDOM6 ай бұрын
I'm strongly empathic, I had a loving mother and was safe and well cared for as a child, and I am in no way stuck in childhood. What a dismissive idea.
@percubit10 Жыл бұрын
Being childlike is where I have been. And it is full of joy. I became a people pleaser. and I have no more to give.
@MichelleSQuick9 ай бұрын
I’m sure this is useful for empaths with parents but not all that useful for empaths who were abandoned in childhood and therefore not in need of individuating from any parent.
@mjrussell414 Жыл бұрын
This is so true. I’m 54 and trying to find happiness and fulfillment but I keep fighting against myself I now seem to be understanding. I have been trying to learn life lessons and grow spiritually but something always holds me back, and I think it has to do with not having a childhood so I’m stuck in some patterns. I’ve tried to give up the people pleasing but now I get where it comes from. My mother battled mental illness so I had to grow up fast and often was her counsellor. My sister tried to get the attention she needed by acting out as the “brat,” so I often came between them and tried to resolve issues. At ages 8-10. She eventually committed suicide and died not long after I turned 11. I didn’t realize these experiences have affected me my whole life because I just tried to do my best every day and live. Our father basically left us to our own devices and didn’t give us much guidance or support. To be fair, he probably didn’t know how to handle the situation either. I’ve never had strong role models and have let myself be taken advantage of so many times. I’m trying to break the patterns but I’m still failing at this life thing it seems. I feel so lost now more than ever since I now know what I’m lacking at my core. I hope I find the answers I need. Everybody’s journey is different.
@nigelmiller951 Жыл бұрын
Im 58,still fighting!
@mydearfrankly6055 Жыл бұрын
Same. @@nigelmiller951
@empress9857 Жыл бұрын
You will
@sydneyannchaneythomas Жыл бұрын
may God bless you and hold you@@empress9857
@tiawarren5403 Жыл бұрын
Sounds eerily similar to me... one day at a time..sigh...
@Robin-cz4hj10 ай бұрын
I wish I could have learned this teaching 60 years ago, but better late then never ❤
@451oneandonly10 ай бұрын
I'm in agreement with you on that one Robin
@RepentTimeIsAtHand10 ай бұрын
It is a gift from Almighty God to be able to give and not expect anything back. I am a child of Almighty God. It is never nessacary to be validated by another flawed human being. Because we are all flawed. If someone can not accept me with my flaws aware of and I am on top on those flaws so they do harm anyone else. I am an empath, if someone takes advantage ofvmy kindness or mistakes my kindness for a weakness...I will gracefully shake the dust from my feet and pray for that person. I will not shift blame to mom and dad. I am a grown adult and that makes me responsible for my own actions. Thank you Holy Spirit gor your guidance. Thank you Jesus for loving me.
@APsGTG9 ай бұрын
This is the thing. I’m the same way, and people feel so truly demonic nowadays that all the empathy feels like something we should plug up. Even if you’re strong and command respect, people will still want to abuse your empathy out of their own volition. What’s the point of using it anymore? For children yes, but for any adults, it seems useless to have.
@doodles_down_under Жыл бұрын
This is exactly what I needed to hear today. This made me reach right back to my childhood to assess how and why I feel the way I do. I have a lot of work to do, but am so happy I found your channel, thank you Aaron 😊
@VeelaAmmons11 ай бұрын
Oh my God, this is incredible. I believe the Holy Spirit sent me here. I've never heard of you or seen your face. I'm only a few minutes into the video. I'm much older than you, but you just described my life. Except my Mother never had the courage to leave my narcissistic stepfather. My Mother called it gift of prophecy. My 5th grade teacher explained what 'empathetic' meant and used me as the example. Unfortunately, he defined it as not only feeling what others feel but sacrificing for others. Taking on their pain. When I was younger, that would actually happen. My Mother worked incessantly. When you said being self-sufficient, I literally had to pull my car over. I'm going to finish looking at this video. I cried out to God and He sent you. Bless you. 🙏
@califorsyth84499 ай бұрын
Thank you Aaron. I didn't individuate until I was in my fifties, but I DID IT! Thank you for this information. Much love.
@mehmandst.94 Жыл бұрын
I think I have to go a long way in this case!🙄 I was very far from myself because of others and when I decided to be myself, I realized that no one wants to be with me anymore!! No one accepts that I belong to myself and not to their wishes🤦♀️
@ImIkaj Жыл бұрын
That’s when rejection is blessings because it pushes you to find those who accept you. It’s never too late to put yourself first. Being mindful of your feelings comes naturally for me but I kinda had to figure out others don’t do that. And they aren’t as in tune with themselves. What I’ve found is people that remind me of my family dynamic, I automatically move myself away from them. I reject them. Not them as people but just having access to me.
@julia21664 Жыл бұрын
Hey, Aaron. Thank you for the perfect message at the perfect time (as it applies to me). I don’t know about others, but I need to say that I have a bad reaction to your use of AI clips for highlighting key points; My heart is open to the genuine message, then it “clicks shut” the nanosecond I see the artificial, soulless “people” on the screen. The energy goes back and forth throughout. High vs. low, real vs. fake.
@empress9857 Жыл бұрын
I feel you n I’m ok with now 🤷♀️ it hurts confusion all those emotions but being told I changed I act different etc is enuff for me to know
@angelapitts1928 Жыл бұрын
Thank you for never giving up on being your true self you have inspired me greatly, especially lately, I loved the live meditation it was unbelievable. Before you made this video I could sense and relate to everything you're saying about your dad and all of the expectations Of you. I'm proud to say that I'm an empath. Thank you for your guidance!
@langtoronto8 ай бұрын
Seriously you are so on the ball in your analysis on empaths.
@Zatchamoe Жыл бұрын
being an empath is not always an attachment or wound from the past or a childhood pattern though. Empathy doesn't always mean you abandon yourself or your feelings for the validation or appeasement of others. It can be pure compassion or forgiveness out of your own intuition, understanding. Just like everything in life, it takes time to find the balance and growth. I was once in that boat where i thought i always had to please those that used me or drained me but growing my own confidence through realizing my worth as an individual, made me realize it was all in the reason and intention of how i was approaching and connecting with people. When we act without expectation of validation or acceptance of another, i feel becomes a pure action rather than being reliant on those that don't see the value of being humble. I'd say my empathetic side has been one of my greatest teachers in terms of understanding and accepting all my life.
@ljp5735 Жыл бұрын
This is what my minds thinks as well 👏
@alexmook6786 Жыл бұрын
Well said....you should have made this video.
@pattip141311 ай бұрын
I agree with this take.
@elleelle720011 ай бұрын
I don’t think empathy is the same as compassion and forgiveness as you say. Also saying someone is an empath isn’t equivalent to saying someone has empathy or is empathetic. Listen to what he said to understand versus to respond.
@Zatchamoe11 ай бұрын
@@elleelle7200 oh I watched it, and didn't disagree with everything he had to say, I definitely understood what he was pointing out as i didnt mention he was completely wrong, so it's not just to "respond" not everyone who questions or makes a statement is doing that, but can offer another perspective productively. And if you read my comment not to "respond" you would see I said it "can" be pure compassion or forgiveness, not that it is empathy.
@AllisonBalanc Жыл бұрын
That first question brought tears to my eyes. I've been coming out of shrinking in any way the last 6 years of my life and Ive reached a very crossroads moment. Being all I've been placed here to be is the highest form of love for myself and the collective and I have to be okay losing ppl along the way. Thank you for this.
@franknikki76887 ай бұрын
...Wow. Like... holy crap. This really blew my mind and made me understand why my relationships have always been the way that they are. I am an empath and this makes so much sense that I really am speechless. It's time to set some boundaries. I've been hurt so much, as recent as today. My entire life. Thank you for sharing this. I have been giving all of my energy for everyone since I can remember and now I understand why.
@calliemc Жыл бұрын
Empathy and empaths are two different things...and people pleasers aren't always empaths...two different things....being an empath isnt always a negative thing either....this is about your journey and if you come from this perspective then you will find personal growth...
@tommycoyote3258 Жыл бұрын
Aside from reading people's personalities and how exhausting it can be, I've only experienced bad things when I try to explain to people that I'm an empath and get rejection. It's usually after I tell them something about their core being that they don't want people to know.
@youcancallmesteph Жыл бұрын
Agreed! Thank you for saying that. I think people think that because they have empathy, that makes them an empath - it doesn’t. I’m an empath and intuitive and it is painful. Being an empath can really effect your life.. you can actually feel the collective energy and emotions of people.
@The_Robs Жыл бұрын
@@youcancallmestephexactly! I believe I’m highly sensitive and an empath, to the point that I’ll get physically sick from others’ energy. I took my 90 year old mom to the ER last weekend when she wasn’t feeling right, thankfully within a few hours we left with some adjustment to her medication and she is doing better now. By the time I went outside to get the car, I was gasping for breath (I’m pretty sure the man who coughed constantly a few rows back of us in the waiting room was Covid positive, I heard a nurse mention a positive test result just as we were leaving). It took all week to recover from that visit, energy wise. When my kids were sick during childhood, I always felt sick as well. When I worry about anyone, I can become quite sick with headaches and nausea. I’m starting to wonder if counselling would help me.
@SA-px3ln Жыл бұрын
@@youcancallmesteph so do believe what he says? True empath and sensitive ppl feel more then people know like energy and having narcissist family I have seen their energy is evil there is no way you can just accept it and that it we are same ppl.
@kassandramcpherson28399 ай бұрын
This! My husband is a people pleaser but has about 0% empathic ability.
@jelenajosic3552 Жыл бұрын
I'm an empath since forever and I confirm what this guy is saying. What this guy tells you here, people, is one of the most important things you need to hear and do in your life (if not THE most important thing)! My empath nature still tends to tune in to others' energies from time to time, but every time I chose and managed to individuate, my life changed tremendously for better.
@YouKnowMeDuh8 ай бұрын
I gave up people pleasing majorly a few years back. But I am still tired. Part of me wonders sometimes if my happiness is tied to being needed by other people. I sure said so when I was a teen. I'm not a leader. I'm a loner.
@FrancieMoon9 Жыл бұрын
Omg Aaron, this is such crucial information for me. You did a meditation video a while back, I watched it last year, and it was about this concept of feeling the separation between you and other people.... you had us "pull our power back to us".... And this was so intense for me.... at the moment I pulled it all back into me there was an electricity blackout in my town...at that exact moment! It didnt feel like a coincidence! You are a great spiritual teacher!!
@SA-px3ln Жыл бұрын
I have hard time pulling my energy back it’s glued to narcissist family I can’t let go causing anxiety depression
@katharinaharke6907 Жыл бұрын
Did this happen for real? Tell me more
@lilyr6755 Жыл бұрын
@@SA-px3ln me to narcasist slum lord cuz I have no place of own like I need to go & my hrs messed up & every area every time I fix it gets messed up & ran out of time I needed & hoping to still. Also, yes giving at expense of self. I'm learning nit to, but still. I am a bit stuck with family member I love & is my twin flame soul mate too. The rest I truly cut out, cuz they are asleep in either extreme religious a bit or in the middle, etc & the other lust spirits,cuz promiscuity in the past & so forth, I don't like. It's sad. Chaotic in a way that makes me mure chaotic energy, plus toxic. The one that's always been here in USA I also can't trust lying bulky. He's not evil or bad, just idk controlling & idk if he dues it from caring or not, but that's not what I got really. I am awake & what I heard & see I didnt want to hear again or care.
@lilyr6755 Жыл бұрын
He is. He is such a normal person, but yet supernatural with those powers from connecting meditation. Hus voice & all you can tell. Serious. I like that. He & Victor Oddo like no one like them.
@christopheryannatone4406 Жыл бұрын
It’s funny cause I have both empathic and narcissistic qualities at least in the way you described them… absolutely crazy how well you explained this. I watch your videos from time to time, thank you for the good work you put out and the messages you bring to humanity
@christopheryannatone4406 Жыл бұрын
@ConsciousCreatrix absolutely, I don’t believe I’m a genuine narc but my “narcissistic” traits seem to be “lack of consideration for others” depending on who you ask and yet I find that my biggest issue was focusing too MUCH on others and abandoning myself. My “selfishness” was only observed once I began saying no to people and prioritizing myself. It’s all perspective
@heikebaumann5683 Жыл бұрын
Oh yes. In my case I always felt like a people pleaser and a victim. In my actual process more and more my narcisstic parts are coming up. I often hear, that I am egoistic. But I believe, this is a way of healing, to come in the healthy middle at one point. 😊
@inspired2rv66110 ай бұрын
Wow, I’m 56 years old, I had no idea about all this. It makes so much sense. Thank you so much for having the courage to share this information. It makes so much sense. Now I wanna share it with my kids but I’m going to resist the temptation because I have a feeling it’s just because I want to take responsibility for how they are🤣 I just want to live from my authentic, true self, and it seems so challenging at times.🙏🏻💕✨
@fekatpodcast11 ай бұрын
It's crazy how timely and accurate this is esp when you talked about leadership energy and having a strong sense of self. I am a recovering people pleaser and empath and I see it in my life. Cheers to progressing and healing, and cheers to more promotion! (Life promotion not just work)
@reneeleblanc122411 ай бұрын
Very interesting. I have been researching childhood trauma. My sister is narcissistic and very focused on herself, and I am very sensitive and feel and pay attention to others. It does make sense. I am not drawn to her narcissistic ways. I have been creating better boundaries for myself lately. This presentation does make sense on many levels.
@angelafernandez992711 ай бұрын
Exactly, i am un t'he same position as you!!! T'he same. I set clear bounderies, no call me , just texts... She drawn me soooo much!!! She let me withoyt any energy, And I am realizing about all of this patterns
@exiledgoomba5 ай бұрын
My brother and I were the same. He bullied the heck out of me, and I became very kind, although with 1000 other issues "unrelated" to it such as addiction, self loathing, etc. I've always given all my love to everyone else so I had none left for myself I guess. I'm working on it, I want to be someone I'm proud of.
@pointofnoreturn31037 ай бұрын
Hmmm. I am an empath. A friend theorizes that because I forgave the person who abused me, and prayed for his salvation, that my abuse is an invisible stigmata. I have no conscious memory of what I was like before my abuse, because I was 3 years old at the time. I am going through counseling, and a week ago, my counselor showed me a chart about all of the things that trauma can do. One of those things is frequent headaches and/or body aches. It was like a light went on! I have fibromyalgia. The body remembers what past injury feels like, and the nerves fire off on their own, without a new injury triggering the nerve. I thought it was because I gave birth to twins in my late thirties. ...I wouldn't say that I am a people pleaser. I have long since realized that people's approval is fickle. But, I was having a discussion with our twins the other day, after school. They are 11 years old! I was telling them that the REAL trick is to love people, and feel happiness just because people have their innate potential to make good choices, even if that person doesn't love you back. There is boundless strength to draw upon if you can make the choice to love people regardless of their actions. To my way of thinking, people's potential for good is how God is present in everyone around us! ...I am a CNA. I love my job, because at the end of the day, I get to feel like I have DONE something to make the world a better place! You CAN genuinely be altruistic, because you want your life to have meaning in the grand scheme of things, and it would have not a thing to do with needing other people's approval... Take care. I enjoyed your video! Thanks! Susan
@alisamooshoflove4288 Жыл бұрын
This video made my brain tickle and so many things clicked! My family immigrated to the US from Ukraine in 1995. My bro and I definitely changed, (sometimes I wonder if he's a sociopath), while I took on the role of translator at age 6. Suddenly found myself terrified of conflicts, ensured to speak, act and look like the, "perfect," girl/daughter. Couldn't take it anymore around age 13... and realized I had to start conditioning my parents to give me freedom. In 1 day: chopped my super long blonde hair off and dyed my new pixie cut blue 💙. It took years .. and I definitely portrayed a much more rebellious teen than in reality... But eventually, my parents started accepting me... Mama Bear helped me pick out hair colors, (her favs were blue & pink) & papa bear somehow understood my fashion taste at the time.. supported my choice to attend an art institute after graduation.. I'm 35 now and am grateful to say that my parents will embrace my quarks... and when I call them, it's because i actually want to - not as an obligation. Granted.. still struggle with potential confrontations, but don't avoid them at all costs. Oof sorry so long! If anyone read through all of that.. THANK YOU! Felt nice to share 💙💛
@nancyfox7871 Жыл бұрын
A BEAUTIFUL share, in no way was it too long. You show the beauty in evolving oneself.
@jenna_rem Жыл бұрын
💙💛
@sauravbasu8805 Жыл бұрын
In what way did your brother change and why do you call him a sociopath ?
@amberpalmer3708 Жыл бұрын
Aaron, this is one of your most powerful videos yet. Thank you for your courage, honesty, and dedication to share with us and help us grow ❤
@matthewobryant8789 ай бұрын
You literally describe me and my brother and explained to me why I keep attracting certain kinds of people. I always tell myself it's because I like confident borderline cocky people but it's literally my way of staying comfortable in my discomfort. Thanks for making this video.
@dee0731 Жыл бұрын
This is the story of my life, I am glad God is healing me everyday of this 🙌🏻
@eliseintheattic9697 Жыл бұрын
Well that was an interesting take on the situation. It is something I've been working on lately, so I have become aware of this pattern, but this is a very concise explanation. In my opinion, the reason some people become narcissists and others empaths is because it's kind of two sides of the same coin. Both are struggling with uncomfortable emotions and thoughts. The empath blames themselves for those feelings, while the narcissist blames others.
@TheYazmanian10 ай бұрын
Dude, as a kid I was so attuned to other people's energy, I could literally just look at them and feel it. One time I was observing a boy in the classroom and started feeling tremendous anxiety, fear, dread, almost wanting to cry. (He was acting totally normal though, we all were of course, just staring ahead and listening to the teacher) and then I looked at this other boy, David, and I felt immediate calm. It was like, instant relief. I thought it was odd that the feeling could shift so suddenly, but I looked back at the first boy and again, instant anxiety and dread. Looked back at David, immediate calm. It was like a light switch being turned off and on. That was the strongest I've ever felt things before as an empath and yes it was a little terrifying. I thought I was absolutely crazy! I was no older than ten years old at the time.
@kayv584010 ай бұрын
Yes, it’s scary when first realizing what’s going on. I was in elementary, too. Many classmates would open up to me about things that looking back, as had I known better, should have been told to a school counselor. I loved helping people and ‘feeling’ how they were lighter than before our conversations, but it was a lot and I didn’t know why people opened up about things they normally wouldn’t talk about. _______ In high school I would ask people if they were okay (because I felt a lot of sadness from them) and one friend started crying and asked how I knew she wasn’t okay. She said only myself & 1 other person had noticed she was being extra quiet that day 😢.
@TheYazmanian10 ай бұрын
@@kayv5840 Yes! Same!. And sometimes with certain people, I'll listen for hours and then naturally they are lighter and feel better but it can have a negative impact on me if I'm not careful. While interacting with them I feel great but afterwards, when they are gone, or I've hung up the phone then I feel incredibly drained.
@doreenkrenkel772110 ай бұрын
Thank you , for sharing. I loved. "as a kid was so atuned to other people's energy "
@TheYazmanian10 ай бұрын
@@doreenkrenkel7721 You're welcome! It was definitely intense
@melissanaidoo7924 Жыл бұрын
There's so much truth in your video... I've been in my company for 17 years but I have so many blocks 😔... 100% Truth in everything you're saying... Being the first born I've experienced all of this... I have tears in my eyes... 😔
@dawnpratt4608 Жыл бұрын
I hope your find a true friend their is some good people out there but I see people being two faced so I'm very careful who I have in my life.
@melissanaidoo7924 Жыл бұрын
Thank you so much Dawn.. Sending you love and light 🙏.
@amyrobe3744 Жыл бұрын
Thank you for this video. I find that many people who say they are "empaths" really just don't have boundaries. I find that what's healthy is to have empathy for someone but at the same time keep a boundary knowing where you end and the other begins.
@nicoleandrews39617 ай бұрын
This is 100% accurate about how you become an empath and how it manifests as an adult. I had to learn where my emotions start and end and where the other persons energy starts Now i use my "feeling others emotions" to help them.. An interesting thing to note - if i didnt grow up in the family i grew up in, i wouldnt have learnt what i learnt and been able to help the people ive been helping... This speaks to "Everything works out FOR my good".. whether good or bad.
@lalaamini1084 Жыл бұрын
This is one of the best videos I've seen. The information presented, I was already aware of, but I was sitting there with puzzle pieces that only made sense on their own, and not as a whole. Hearing all this made it come full circle, in a very powerful way. Thank you so much for this 🙏🙏🙏❤️❤️❤️❤️
@daoshen11 ай бұрын
you say these things as if the empath cannot exist simultaneously within the narcissist. speaking from experience!
@robynharris52189 ай бұрын
Interesting. I was listening to this wondering if it was possible for one person to have both traits. I think it is.
@A.J.C_Inspirations6 ай бұрын
Oh my goodness Aaron, you have opened my eyes to the victimisation I'm cradling myself in; enveloping it as an Empath. I've recently had the calling to realise what an empath really means and I couldn't work it out, you have cleared the fog for me. Thank you so much, I need to work on myself and I can see that it's controlling me. Always putting everyone's feelings first to avoid confrontation (kids, husband, work, friends, family). I always thought I had an amazing upbringing but upon true reflection, I see I was always compared to my older sister and trying to live up to my parent's expectations of her. I need to keep learning and find my true self! 🙏🙏
@kmars323911 ай бұрын
Being an empath, I feel as if I’m always reminiscing or living in the past. I feel like my my brain holds those memories so close. It’s definitely a dare place for my mind to escape to. Has anyone else experienced this?
@clairecarscallen10 ай бұрын
Always reliving the past, especially the negatives possibly because there were so many. I feel so many regrets over the times when I feel like I failed to do enough for my pets or my kids, because I was so stressed and damaged and also financially unable. I wish I could really make my brain believes that thinking about things won’t change the past.
@kmars323910 ай бұрын
@@clairecarscallen exactly Claire, same. Sending you love and healing ❤️🩹
@clairecarscallen10 ай бұрын
@@kmars3239 Thanks. Wishing you healing too. It's a hell of a life, isn't it?
@rrmother374810 ай бұрын
Me too. Especially lately. I have so much regret about not protecting my kids. I couldn’t see what was happening (WHY, brain?! WHY?!) so I failed to protect them from my husband’s/their father’s subtle abuse. I just am stuck and don’t know what to do. So, instead I reminisce about better times, and therefore I’m not doing anything to change our current situation. And also because I have several chronic illnesses so I’m limited in what I can actually do. Dealing with it all is freakin hard on so many levels. Gentle hugs to all of you.
@clairecarscallen10 ай бұрын
@@rrmother3748 We do blame ourselves when we shouldn’t really; we were so worn down and stressed that we couldn’t have acted in any other way. This is especially true if you grew up under the thumb of a narcissist and then married a narcissist. Your adrenal glands were in overdrive your whole life, causing all kinds of malfunctioning in your body, emotions, and brain. Even realizing this though, it doesn’t make the sadness over lost ‘might have beens’ any less. We deserve to treat ourselves with tenderness and compassion, the way we do others.
@GodHelpMe369 Жыл бұрын
At the beginning of this year, The man whom I revered as my best friend, abandoned and betrayed me. He replaced me. Now... My 53-year old cousin, just suddenly tragically passed. Alone. In his sleep. Unexpectedly. On 10/09/23. RIP cuz. I LOVE YOU ✨💛