Ep. 175: Sundowning, What You Need to Know

[@klehman4832]

I love that the tabs on the video highlight the topics! As a society, we often value logic over emotion. When it comes to de-escalating, I find myself concentrating more on the emotion and sometimes using creative communication to bring back peace. Right or wrong doesn't factor in anymore but to someone from the outside listening and not understanding the disease, it looks like lying. I remember the most confusing conversation with my Mom; Her 'Where's K?". Me; 'I'm right here.' Her; 'Yes, I know that but where's K?" Me; 'I'm still here. I'm your daughter.' Her, (getting anxious,) 'Yes, I know that but where's K?'. Me; 'Which K do you mean?'. Her, 'My daughter.' Me; 'Oh, um... she went to the store. She'll be back later.' Conflict avoided. : )

[@teepasnowvideos]

Hi, @K Lehman, I'm glad to hear that you figured out how to connect with your Mom and not have the conflict. Nice! Thanks for sharing! If you'd like to learn more, please visit www.teepasnow.com or contact us at [e-mail]

[@sheridresser6440]

My mom is in the same situation. She sundowns at various times of day or night. She also now needs complete direction as to “what to do” every single day. She cannot watch TV or read because she can’t remember much of anything or anyone, even me at times. She calls me daily (on her Alexa Echo Show) asking what she is supposed to do next/today, so I have now become her “what to do”. I’m going and taking her out for a meal or to CVS to “shop” nearly every day. I love her dearly and am taking care of all affairs for her. Thank Gid for my husband who is helping me or otherwise I don’t know what I would do.

[@brendadickenson6743]

Mom was like that and my brother and I got puzzles to do and she is the one that decided to join us, and when he went home she and I would do them. Slowly. I never got in her area, but did give her apiece and say, this must go in your area as I can’t find a spot in mine. I waited until she had the space ready to put it in, but let her find it. She would tell me she had been looking for that, thanks! Sometimes we only put in about 20 pieces that night. But I found she would sit and talk more to me between working the puzzles. I had it seem it was as hard for me to do as she did….now it seems it does, she has been gone 19 months now. She was 4+ when she passed and I will be 72 in May.

[@teepasnowvideos]

Hi, @Brenda Dickenson, thanks for sharing your ideas and your story.

[@teepasnowvideos]

Hi, @Sheri Dresser, thanks for sharing your story. I'm so glad that you have someone to help you too.

[@mdevorah6833]

My mom had the sun downing, when she had to go to the hospital for 4 days, then go to a rehab/nursing center for close to 2 months, then a different hospital several days, back to nursing/rehab and finally back to her assisted living. I felt so bad for her,she couldn't keep up with where she was at or why she was still not "home"... it even took about 1 week, once back at her assisted living to get straightened out. The moves, the pain meds, and a UTI were all culprits. She is 94

[@teepasnowvideos]

Hi, @M Devorah, it sounds like your mom was experiencing a lot of changes very rapidly and you are so right about the culprits. Thanks for sharing your insights.

[@BrianLevy4210]

amazing insight and tips. Thank you for you Teepa!

[@janetpogue4970]

Our loved one doesn't seem to have this

[@CBeckless]

Also, how do you change courses with sundowning if LO isn't very verbal?

[@teepasnowvideos]

Hi, @Just CB, it sounds like you would like to know more about how to communicate with your LO who seems to be exhibiting sundowning behavior. There are some techniques that might help. Please check out this search from our website (teepasnow.com/search/?search=sundowning) for a number of articles and videos. You may also want to reach out to our team for a free 30-minute consulation ([e-mail])

[@CBeckless]

Is sundowning an indicator of the stage my loved one my be in. My mom is 62yo and was diagnosed with dementia 2 years ago, but has been showing concerning signs for about 4-5years prior.

[@teepasnowvideos]

Hi, @Just CB, thanks for asking. Sundowning is not necessarily an indicator of the stage a person in is, but rather what they are experiencing in the moment.

[@chrisboyce1]

It’s totally related to the change in time . I’ve noticed this over the last 4 years now . When it starts getting dark that’s when I have have problems. As winter approaches and it gets darker earlier I get worse and the when summer comes my sundowning goes down slightly . I’m just not buying infinite environmental for me what so ever

[@teepasnowvideos]

Hi, @LivingwithCTE, thanks for sharing your experience with us. It sounds like you really understand yourself and your reactions to light/dark and times of day.

[@chrisboyce1]

@@teepasnowvideos absolutely when I first started suspecting I could have this I kept a daily journal for two months . It helped my neurologist confirm that’s what I have and really help me know what I should expect. Every night is difficult for me but atleast I know what’s going on . I am only 46 so I do have concern how bad this will get as I get older

[@milliondollargoldrose]

Its just so hard. It seems no matter how kind i am when it comes to the bathroom a lot of the times my dad wont let me pull his pants down. I dont know what to do.

[@teepasnowvideos]

Hi, @milliondollargoldrose, yes, it's hard especially when you are trying to help your dad in the bathroom. Maybe some of these videos (www.youtube.com/@teepasnowvideos/search?query=toileting) will help. If you would like to talk to someone about it, please contact us for a free 30 minute consult at [e-mail]

[@stevietalk1]

Mom is in an Indy/ass’t living res ( she’s 91, 3 1/2 yrs. now in res, she has no help, except recently started having her meds given in a.m.) she hasn’t had a TV in over a yr. cause she can’t work the new (easy) remote .. She’s a doer with nothing to do… :/ She won’t consider moving… but she’s miserable when she can’t hear live music & dance (all she wants to do) I’m not there most times to help her through the nothing to do & empty evenings ..

[@teepasnowvideos]

Hi, @Stevie L. I'm sorry to hear that your mom is feeling miserable. I'm wondering if it might help to have you talk with one of our consultants. We offer free 30-minute meeting with low price follow-ups if necessary. Please contact us [e-mail] or 1-877-877-1671.

[@stevietalk1]

@@teepasnowvideos thx, I have done a couple of times .. she’s stubborn & I just have to keep my boundaries with compassion ..

[@SuzanneHoodartist]

Seeking children's book about dementia. Does one exist?

[@kathleenkinney9039]

I just Google it!

[@teepasnowvideos]

Hi, @Suzanne Hood, we do actually have a few books for children. Please visit this link: shop.teepasnow.com/product-category/all-products/ and then search for "Children". We have 3 that might be helpful to you and some new ones coming out in the next year.