Ep. 243 | Negative People

Joshua and Ryan talk about why we are addicted to negativity, gossip, and other disempowering emotions and behaviors, as well as what we can do to improve or walk away from negative situations. Watch “Maximal” episodes of The Minimalists Private Podcast exclusively at / theminimalists
Questions answered in this episode:
How do I tactfully address disrespectful family members? (01:30)
How do I handle welcome and unwelcome teasing from others? (03:26)
How do I manage the offensive behavior of others? (04:42)
How do I stand up for myself with loved ones? (08:10)
How do I address a toxic relationship with a superior at work when using HR is not an option? (13:22)
What is the difference between immoral and illegal? (14:51)
How do I recognize when I’ve reached the breaking point at my job? (15:17)
How do I appropriately address people who constantly judge me and overstep boundaries? (24:32)
How do I establish appropriate boundaries with others? (24:57)
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[@arq.tatibruzzoni5884]

With toxic or negative people, try keeping this mantra in mind : ´´peace vs. victory´´. If your goal is peace, then you can selfregulate, you don´t need other´s approval, their opinions are somewhat irrelevant and you don´t have this urge to be on the same page about everything. You are at peace with yourself first. If what you are after is victory and winning, well my friend, then get ready for a neverending war. Personally, I just let them be and keep my peace intact.

[@1234L-k9h]

ㄚˉㄜˉㄜ

[@1234L-k9h]

作為ㄛ

[@1234L-k9h]

愛女錒ㄌˉㄜ

[@1234L-k9h]

ㄜ

[@1234L-k9h]

哭完了還愛8？

[@tildenchild2360]

“You get what you tolerate”. Good quote

[@carlajones8577]

The comment about boundaries really resonated with me. I let myself get annoyed and upset far too often without actually letting people know that it bothers me. Keep up the good work guys! 👍

[@lorraineturton4485]

So happy you liked that comment about boundaries. It really helps out when establishing what you feel comfortable with and what you do not like too.

[@infinityspark5363]

Damn.What have I been doing with my life. I cant believe I didn't know about this PODCAST!!!!! Now I'm gonna binge watch all their videos :)

[@GypsyWolf7]

It will change your life. 😊

[@joegable_77]

I did the same thing about a year ago.

[@corinacorina1888]

Same!! 😂 The good news is now that I know about it it helps encourage and improve my life.

[@s.aura.h8084]

Welcome! 👹😂

[@nata3467]

I listen while I commute...by bike. Feels good knowing there is a community out there.

[@lorraineturton4485]

Insightful information here. Setting boundaries regarding your character "right from the moment you are introduced to someone" is critical in life. I set a standard that reflects my personal choices right away, and then people know what I will accept, disregard or have nothing to do with. When I was in my 20's I had to strengthen my resolve because people took advantage of my generosity, but now, years later, I make it clear right away that " though I am a generous and kind hearted person, nobody will walk all over me". I would not tolerate it. Negative people need to be confronted. They need to be shown that treating others with disrespect is not cool. I want to be an example of what it means to be strong but yet kind. If I oppose something I do not need to resort to any form of rudeness, just state my case simply and effectively.

[@irenebrackett8094]

I really needed this episode a year ago, when I made the decision to take a job I wasn't crazy about to pay down debt. The next best time for this episode was today because I know it is not too late. Like you said, the best time to find a new job is when you already have one. And maybe without that decision I wouldn't have realized that giving up on meaningful work isn't worth getting out of debt faster. Slow, deliberate and steady wins the race. Thanks guys.

[@Becky-vb8fs]

Set boundaries that people can't cross and keep them in place. As soon as you allow things to carry on that you usually do not allow, that person sees it as acceptable. And if you can't confront people then step back. Your actions will speak louder than words and be very careful who you give your time to. It's so precious and you don't know how much time you have left

[@ren8240]

In response to the question about "Inlaws with snide comments" from Shannon in Salt Lake City. I would respond with "Oh simplifying our life has been so beneficial for us, we have minimised so much that now we don't even have a guest bed...but I hear the motel across town is quite nice if you would like me to book a reservation for you?" 😏

[@lorraineturton4485]

Just wanted to say "you guys are very cool". You are both intelligent well spoken people and you are inspirations to those who listen to you. The journey of life allows people to meet one another and I am very pleased with the fact that I can listen to your stories, your subject coverage and your guest speakers.

[@joeytocd]

“Build a lifestyle around life, not style.” 👏🏻

[@LLCCB]

My response to the blanket comment would be "We have a decent amount of blankets, but you can pack a few more if you think you might freeze." And just laugh at such a silly question.

[@karenstough8708]

You guys are so awesome, i'm so glad I discovered you!

[@virious_max]

27:56 I listened to almost all of your podcasts but this is the thing I cannot aggree with, Iifeguards are trained to first try to throw something for you to hold on to. If that's not an option, they will try to rotate you or approach you from behind and then keep you in a carry hold so the victim cannot grab them and drown them.

[@Buddhababe2]

Great podcast as usual. I’m looking forward to the Patreon episode. Interesting that Josh said at the beginning that he thought last week’s Patreon episode on toxic people was one of his favorites because I thought the same thing. This was a good compliment to that one.

[@TheMinimalists]

Thanks for listening!

[@janiesuper3222]

I really liked this episode. I've only learned as I've gotten older to control my reactions to things. It makes life so much easier. Boundaries are so important.

[@a_demain]

true story: I use to take a fan heater to my siblings house when I visited her. she was a hoarder. she had a multitude of fan heaters in the house. but you could never find one that was actually working! to this day she never understands about minimalism. so sad.

[@leilarhymeswithsheila1344]

Jesus sandals were all the go when I was at school (England) many, (many!) years ago. We also called them ‘desert wellies’.

[@leilarhymeswithsheila1344]

Absolutely! Yes, it was the ‘70’s I refer to. Sounds like Ryan has a pair.

[@pandashazz27]

We called them Jesus creepers

[@hjshealy]

Oh, Kayla. I can sooo empathize.

[@sandywilson6432]

Sooooo grateful for you guys!

[@scottwillimack184]

Good stuff guys! Thank you 🙏 Keep up the good work!

[@TheMinimalists]

Our pleasure!

[@jwhite1707]

This ironed out a lot of wrinkles in my mind so I thank you! 🤟

[@Naztalgic]

Thanks Guys.

[@wewemcrhyne]

When I was a training to be a lifeguard, I was taught that one way I could stop the panicky drowning person that grabs me and endangers us both is to knock them out. Better that than for both of us to die. I doubt I could have done that with my 5’3”, 115lb body, so I worked water park slides as opposed to the wave pools. Some females that size can though, I’m just too weak

[@universaltruth2025]

Really the comment about the blanket is just the SIL’s anxiety that they may not be comfortable at your place. (Too cold etc). She doesn’t know how to convey that without coming across as negative so she has tried to make it into a joke, so as to try not to cause offence but still make sure their needs are met while they visit.

[@cabayern9416]

Nah. These remarks are mean-spirited and a point was being made. Very passive aggressive. No boundaries? Establish no contact until they develop boundaries.

[@turquoisewitch.wild-owl]

Happy Belated Birthday!

[@TheMinimalists]

Thank you so much 😀

[@Isabella-f8e8r]

Although I can only understand half of what you say, 😂I like to hear you share stories.I think...What can't we ask others to do? The only thing I can do is to influence them by doing well?It is very important to be kind.There is an old Chinese saying that the environment changes from the heart and the appearance comes from the heart。Thank u..👍

[@artKarolina]

"Get on the same page as your husband" is today's theme as well.

[@shalom6380]

Just what I needed this week, The Minimalist. I am interested in joining Maximalists. Please tell me is the fee per episode that is released or per episode I listen to.

[@TheMinimalists]

Thank you so much for the kind words! Details here: www.patreon.com/theminimalists

[@analuciagoncalvezbonizzi202]

subtítulos en español 🙏!!

[@dkbegue]

Has to be said. Hello simpletons

[@feathersky860]

💙 💥💥💥💥💥

[@simopro8309]

Please can you translate your videos in arabic

[@africaart]

You should talk smack back and say, there are no blankets you must dance to warm up and you must sing, can't on the radio more than 20 minutes a day.