Ep 70: A Couple of Salty Dogs

[@WeMightBeDrunkPod]

Post your best punchline to the Judd Nelson joke here, we will pick the best one and send you some merch.

[@michaelwootan]

Judd Nelson? How old is that guy? Breakfast Club? More like Early Bird special club! (Haven’t watched the pod yet, no idea what joke you’re talking about)

[@williamdeloach3030]

Bartender says "I suppose you won't be needing a drink?" The woman says "Actually, not tonight. Turns out I don't have to get this bitch wasted every night to come home with me, I should've just tried pulling out the hog all along."

[@ThizzyWailer]

Who?

[@SchizSchool]

“No but in an hour he will.” As she walks into the bathroom

[@dijsugdrtggi3684]

the naked lady says, “no, i’m fine, but she’s pretty thirsty.”

[@madisonkludy8541]

The intro hit and my husband immediately pops his head in to check on me. Was a little disappointed to see Mark and Sam, but we made it work

[@thewickedzaku]

Who was disappointed to see them? Your husband? Divorce him. ;)

[@flop_e2990]

reminds me of @JiDion

[@Man.Well93]

you have no husband.

[@djspencerduh]

I played this video in front of a TON of people. Great intro 😂😂💀

[@Jacob-zv7xw]

and all you hear after is dudes

[@AIWFNW]

Nice original open. Have no idea what tht did even b a parody of

[@Pythonzzz]

“Hey hey, folks, we might be drunk, we’re doing it.” “I haven’t actually seen you face to face”

[@normalbutyl]

Lmao I had to look at my phone ❤️

[@steamedyam]

Who plays a podcast for a ton of people

[@erikallen9141]

"The seats are wicker, there's cigarettes in the armrest, there's chickens next to you" 😂😂😂

[@dinibo]

I love how Mark always remembers that this is a show. He knows how to bring the fun and keep it moving on every show. He's just great!

[@bens5974]

Mark resting his glass on the couch always sketches me out

[@RoyoSker]

Threw me off with that new intro!!! I almost panicked, thinking I opened the wrong link 😂 😂 😂

[@troythompson2]

Lmao

[@spytown77]

The intro is lunch baby! I'll drink to that! 🍸

[@nathanmansell8329]

I like watching at 10am as I crack a beer and don’t feel like I’m drinking alone.

[@charlesshepherd2004]

I listen to the pods while working (trucker 🚚) keep em comin! Makes the ride much more enjoyable. I'll be driving and laughing like a hyena. It's great. And the intro scared me.

[@maxdmer03]

56:52 The way Mark looks at his empty glass 😂 Get these guys a drink!

[@dilloncostilla3412]

hahahaha that was a look for sure I wasn't expecting that!

[@darkdre62]

Y’all almost got me in trouble 😂

[@luc_xott]

Candles lit, drink poured, mushrooms consumed. Let's go!

[@prometheusofplanetx6176]

Oi oi!!

[@minergate4066]

How can you look at your screen while on 'shrooms

[@prometheusofplanetx6176]

@@minergate4066 By looking with his eyes .......

[@minergate4066]

@@prometheusofplanetx6176 you're clearly a noob in psychodelics

[@earlymorningpodcast]

damn, College Humor/pHub intro then Mark going full black power immediately is something.

[@portlandsamber]

Love that back of the bartender's neck camera angle.

[@clarencethomas01]

You guys are in such a good rhythm now and the podcast went by so fast! Sally boy seems way more comfortable too and I'm actually glad to see him on now, everything was perfect on this one. Good job guys! Comedy! 🤟

[@zakzak5892]

Such a great podcast love the laid back vibes

[@cj434]

Yooo the intro made my heart drop omg

[@pprotectas8423]

😂👌

[@matt8797]

you guys had me thinking i hadn't closed my other tab yet

[@meatwad5022]

Algo' Great way to arrive home after work with the new ep notification Cheers 🍻 :)

[@amycarrington4545]

My favorite podcast! Look forward to it every week. 🤗

[@itbecameclear]

that intro just got me some weird stares in the work parking lot. thanks

[@andrestein6022]

I know this comes out Sunday evening, but it fits perfectly into my Monday morning before two bears.

[@takodamoyer628]

Then bad friends at noon

[@whiplashchild7388]

One of the things I love about this show is Sam trying to mirror Marks enthusiasm in the beginning with those air punches n stuff :D

[@treignsinblood]

Thanks for scrapping the old intro song👍

[@davidb3738]

Speaking of unfinished jokes heard on movies and TV. "Rectum? Damn near killed em!"

[@nater2037]

Great intro, best pod ever

[@khaledjammal4452]

“Severance” incredible show great semi rec from mark

[@Phlayr]

lovin the new intro

[@skyluke9476]

Venting to mark would be our generations Frasier and it would be the best show ever. Mark just being a terrible therapist, but somehow his bad advice seems to work for his clients. and by night hes a standup comedian.

[@rawpower12xu]

5:37 I remember the time I saw Vider feature for Sam and thought: “man, Vider is jacked! Looks like Jocko Willink’s baby brother”

[@Ruthlesss86]

Great show fellas! Enjoyed the hell out of this one.

[@torstrasburg8289]

Good stuff all around. Mark's narcissist bit gave me the biggest laugh of the ep. Will be a winner.

[@ContinuumTransfuncioner]

Thanks for intro. This is why I love you guys

[@mxxico]

Finally watched Goodfellas I now understand half the podcast

[@maxdmer03]

1:20:08 Happy Gil-MORE-MYGOD!🤣

[@Ontime2day]

you guys need to do a movie podcast!!! love that you guys are cinephiles too! my favorite -philes!

[@AffordableAdorable369]

I've been pushing that "Crimea River" pun for over a month and got no response, to hear Sam laugh when Mark said it, i finally feel validation 🤣🤙 (Not a great time to take a boat out on the Crimea River)

[@whiplashchild7388]

Sorry to tell ya, but that's already been turned into a meme back in like 2014 :/ I felt the same way when I found out that somebody had already made the "whorio" joke.

[@AffordableAdorable369]

@@whiplashchild7388 it's just a pun, I wasn't speaking to me being the creator of it. I was speaking to enjoying the response Sam had, to something I had gotten no response to the last month... but I feel you 💙

[@whiplashchild7388]

@@AffordableAdorable369 Ah, ok. Those folks don't know what they're missing, it's an excellent pun. Cheers!

[@AffordableAdorable369]

@@whiplashchild7388 that's what I was thinking 😉

[@descendanddecay6307]

I work with mostly eastern European immigrants (Ukraine, Bulgaria, Armenia, Isreal, ect.). They didn't find it as funny as you and I do lol

[@jonnygranville281]

This pod has really grown on me. Great stuff

[@dilloncostilla3412]

WOAH!!! FUN INTRO!! Made me look at my screen for a second hahaha

[@elvislives6574]

.... no guests !!! ..... just the lap top Guy !!! ......... these ones are the best ...... just Mark and Sam

[@salacuse]

that's Mr. Google B!tch to you!

[@katieb5722]

Ohhh my! Everything made me laugh this ep.

[@maxdmer03]

44:56 Mark-Rec-Privacy Screen Protector- “

[@primurph]

Sam was out when he heard that the seizure lady was black.Punches pulled.

[@teewhyeee]

I saw that too. Seemed like Mark was hesitant to even mention race, even tho he’s told this story to Joe before and mentioned race then. But Sam mentioned race no problem. Ultimately race shouldn’t matter, but it seemed like Sam was scared to criticize the black woman but ok to criticize the white chick.

[@cesposito]

Yo what's the tier for an episode where Mark's does West Side Story as a one-man show from the couch? Sam, BarJew, and Salacuse are the audience. Shut up and take my money! You guys are the best!

[@maxdmer03]

I gotta see this!

[@choforogabriel]

Y'all are wild for the intro 😆

[@marcoramos4873]

Intro scared the crap out of me. Thought I was on the wrong site.

[@puzzymonsta69]

Hell ya new york groove great song i didnt know about

[@danseng3747]

You guys give new meaning to THEY MIGHT BE GIANTS! You could have a THEY MIGHT BE DRUNK GIANTS

[@miamisdreadpirateroberts369]

MY NEEEGASSS

[@michaelmartinez9417]

The airport story was so good. I remember I been through that first of COVID I got Rif’d to Colorado and for one flight I had a dirty Karen act the same way. Not as comedic but I’d love to talk about it to you guys

[@AgendaInMind]

Most of the more severe illnesses happen to people because an upsetting event occurs in their lives taking them by surprise, unexpectedly, impacting first in the brain, then in the corresponding organ which that part of the brain controls. The end of WWI had absolutely everything to do with the Flu and lung TB outbreak that occurred killing millions. In nature, the biological conflict linked with a territorial fear (just what it means-a fear in your territory, your home, your community, etc.) is a widening of the bronchia (tissue loss). Your body attempts to widen your bronchia in order to allow more air into your lungs to give you more strength and energy to fight to keep your territory safe. Stay with me.......The biological conflict linked with a death fright impacts the lungs. The lungs attempt to grow larger in order to allow more air in because breath equals life, as we all know. No breath equals death. While you are in the fear or death fright conflict, you notice no symptoms of “disease”, except you have cold hands, cold feet, you can’t sleep, you awaken at 3 AM every night, you have little appetite. During the war, millions of people were in fear of the bombing of their homes and cities where the war was most active. Fearing for their lives, their loved ones in the war, their ability to survive. The food in the stores was sparse due to shortages. This lasted for 4 long years! The longer the conflict, the worse the healing phase. Within 2 weeks of the German Chancellor announcing the end of WWI, these millions of people ALL went into the healing phase all at the same time. It is during the healing phase that you experience symptoms of illness! What is the healing phase of the bronchia widening? Severe bronchitis, pneumonia. The body attempts to refill this lost tissue and you experience inflammation, fever, coughing, body aches, fatigue, etc. What is the healing phase of the extra lung tissue that grew? Decomposing of the tissue by TB bacteria and fungi. The symptoms of this healing phase are: severe coughing up of blood and tissue, fever, inflammation, severe mucous, body aches, fatigue. During this decomposing of the extra tissue (tumor), the body expels a lot of protein, and without replenishment, severe protein loss can result in death. Antibiotics did not exist yet. If TB bacteria does not exist in a person or they have been vaccinated against TB (big mistake), then the tumor will simply encapsulate and become dormant and not harm you. Who died during the Spanish Flu? Mainly the poor who could not afford to buy meat and proper nourishment, and the people who were directly impacted by the bombings and destruction of their homes. Millions of people suffered fear and death frights during the fighting of WWI, and millions of people all went into healing at the end of it. Not everyone was affected because not everyone suffered the same way. It’s not a “flu”, it’s not something you “catch”. It’s biological, meaningful, and unavoidable. One hundred years later, a Fear Campaign begins, using the media to spread it......

[@GentandHimself]

Hey Mark and Sam, do you own the audio to any of your specials? Would you ever do a limited CD run of either I've Got This or Out To Lunch?

[@SparkySINN]

The intro 💯😹

[@user-rb8cr1zl4n_]

sorry , i have to express myself while i'm alive, you never know tomorrow, you're adorable

[@Nocebolla]

Hyped for Sam's show in SLC this weekend! Mark says it's bubbling!

[@MrCoolkidnick]

the poop smear bits got me dying over here lmaooo

[@saint3211]

Holy shit the Batman Beyond (or batman of the future depending on where you lived) shoutout, I haven't heard someone mention that in years, I loved that show so much.

[@subliminaloats1]

props to the bartender handling thos russian q’s

[@uberfresco]

Intro was a good laugh. I do miss the "We Might Be Drunk" song though

[@FaterialL]

great pod fellas

[@kylegeee]

If Mark doens't start doing the Chief Queef version of a psychiatrist after this, I will be upset.

[@patrick815]

Post WWII the music industry was asked to create music that made you feel safe and happy etc

[@24749ersrock]

So happy Sam recommended in cold blood. A teacher told me to read it in high school and I still think about it to this day.

[@autumnmount495]

Columbus has so like 5 malls and they all literally have the same thing but sounds like you went to Easton. Lol.

[@JFred720]

Surprised there is not more subs for this podcast

[@WeMightBeDrunkPod]

Me too, but we haven't hit a year yet, so maybe by June we hit 100k? Share it with a friend to get us there. The analytics show 60% of viewers aren't subscribed.

[@93captian]

The boogaloo was not aligned at all with the proud boys. 😂😂

[@mjaada]

"Krimea river" 😂

[@prometheusofplanetx6176]

Was draaaankin' Whiskey, but decided to pause the show, hop aawwwn my bicycle and go buy Vodka and Grapefruit juice! Naaaaa'I'm drinkin' whatya drinkin'!!

[@prometheusofplanetx6176]

Oh. Side note: If you're taking Heart medication, think twice before zeh Grapefruit. You might die.

[@ajstrauss55]

I really panicked about the sound when I started 🤣🤣

[@Melanittanigra]

new intro is perfect

[@b0ssatr0n91]

I love how they did the ads right after Mark mentions royalties lol

[@jefffffoster]

Love the new outro song!!

[@doghouse010]

No more parodies! Get your own original theme song! This show deserves it!!!

[@TheScottGillies]

I've made riffs on this for YEEEARS!! To see a pro do the very same makes me feel pretty smart. Crimea River! 36:17

[@luislemuz6642]

That intro is great !🤣

[@-Will.]

The new intro is much better!

[@maxdmer03]

It’s a classic gift shop. Mugs/T-Shirts/keychains. Bought a lanyard @ 9/11 Museum🤷‍♂️

[@zachhall624]

These two together are like New York and poo smearing. It just makes since

[@matteotortiello3022]

Here in italy there was a very funny comic song about a superhero that smears poop on the villains (Shpalman - Elio e le storie tese)💩🙈🙈

[@Eltron2010]

You totally fucked me on the intro! 🤣😂🤣😂

[@teewhyeee]

that intro LOL

[@bulkbogan4320]

Crimea/"cry me a river" had gasping for air at work!

[@deyoungstar]

Mark Norman sounds like a baaing sheep when he says “yeaaaaaaaaaah”

[@ConoverJ934]

Guys, The Batman is fucking awesome. I hope you guys enjoy it.

[@guybehindtheguy.]

Mazel boys! Best in the biz!

[@michellethompson726]

Was waiting on their take of the Oscars.

[@jonathano5402]

New intro had me for sec

[@AffordableAdorable369]

22:40 this guy really knows how to run a smear campaign against himself. Dancing with the Stars, may not be enough 😉🤣

[@kokorolex]

Bruuuhhhgh the intro got me good 🤣

[@My_oh_face]

Are you sure you were at the Columbus airport and not the Saint Louis airport? I think my friend saw this happen

[@kevingallagher406]

yoyo i didn't know mark was on a podcast but i should've hyped to get into thia

[@kristallyzation]

Mark needs to come to New England, someone tell him!

[@thedonbishop55]

I’ve been asking him since 2014. He doesn’t like us. :(

[@i.r.baboon3711]

I forgot where I was with that intro MonkaS

[@bruh3646]

I've been watching a ton of jidion lately so this intro had me tripping lol

[@RebornAsASquid]

26:03 got that autotune on normand

[@j.c.9256]

The intro freaked me out, I thought I hit the wrong button!

[@Blade70]

That intro scared me. 😆

[@Duzzer_One]

Yo best intro ever, fucking aye where do I remember that by??

[@ase11k]

ctfu at the cellphone war lol

[@thesamminator1]

The new intro is so good, much better than a 30 second song. Keep it up fatties!