Episode

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[@sarah-ed4iu]

Your videos are like moral crack. I love hearing the profound understanding you are willing to share with common people who are just looking for an explanation of human nature. This podcast has by far improved my quality of life and my quality of thinking. Well done for dedicating yourself to making relentlessly thought provoking material!

[@unfortdork]

Every person is a common person.

[@_PanchoVilla]

I didn't have any friends in high school. At lunch-time, I would hide myself in the bathroom so how others perceive me and my persona would be preserved. Insecurity at its finest.

[@Reverend-Insanity9]

So Amazing podcast

[@nadinehitie]

holy shit, this put things into perspective for me (especially regarding relationships). i hope i can use this information and insight to grow as a person instead of dismissing it and staying the same

[@edosubakti2468]

No please no. If you're mindblown by this, you'd probably misunderstood this or took things out of context, I am 100% sure

[@nadinehitie]

@@edosubakti2468 Because my original comment was made 3 YEARS AGO, I had to rewatch this episode (which I was more than happy to do as I love this channel) so I could refresh my memory on the ideas being explored here. 1. I was 21-22 years old when I originally listened to this episode and made this comment. Generally speaking, young adults tend to be more insecure due to a lack of life experience and being eager to please, and I was no exception. Whilst I was already dabbling in the idea of challenging my brain-washed/indoctrinated & insecure inner-voice, it hadn't fully clicked until I had found this video. Whilst I wouldn’t say I was ‘mind-blown’ (and I never did in my original comment either), this video did really help me connect the dots so I could continue my journey of personal growth. 2. Yes, this video put things into perspective for me. It made me realise on a much deeper level that insecurities are something we can outgrow and unlearn if we simply take the time to detangle the knot within ourselves & get to the root of the problem. Once we do that hard work, we can then start to become better people with less judgement. As far as I’m concerned, I haven’t misunderstood anything as Philosophize This! has done a great job of making the ideas in this video very easy to digest and understand. And even if I did misunderstand this video from your perspective, who cares? Who made you the arbiter of what is and isn’t the correct way to interpret philosophical content? Isn’t the point of philosophy to think critically and analyse things in deep & abstract ways to try and better understand the world around us? What I take away from this video may not be the same thing you take away from this video, and that’s okay because we are different people with our own life experiences that have shaped us into who we are and who we’re going to be.

[@DirtyBottomsPottery]

I had a woman in my life who I fell in love with multiple times over a 10 year period. I was super insecure, still am. I drove her nuts. At some point I had to tear myself away from her, and ended our friendship. She left the country. Got married. Had a kid. A couple months ago I asked her to be my friend again. For the first time in my life I was happy for her. I still want her. I still care for her. The pain of not being with her is still there. But I am okay with that, because she's happy. This is probably one of the most painful things I've ever come to realize. Her happiness matters more to me than my own. Life sucks. I wish I could find someone.

[@unfortdork]

I think it should be remembered that this guy is speaking from a place of male privilege. Life is genuinely more costly for women making decisions. There are still countries where a woman acting as he suggests in relationships, would be killed. Women are overwhelmingly murdered by jealous significant others, so we can't just walk away from relationships with abandon. Yes I get that it is also a threat to men, but statistically low compared to women. So this becomes a different case from simple insecurities. There are layers of information women have to get through before pleasure. ...my chipped teeth can attest. For an example, my ex-husband was showing signs of interest elsewhere, so I just ask him if he wanted a divorce, nothing dramatic, just time to split a bit. Everything was going fine, we were cordial and I was living my life. Well, when he suddenly realized the women he wanted were not a guarantee, he can running back to me (already moved-on with a new bf). When I declined his advances, he went full stalker. I had to quit a performance group and call the cops. It was terrifying, because that's how my step-dad got before he put my mom in the ICU after their divorce. In addition to men reacting violently when women leave, men are also 7 times more likely to leave a partner when diagnosed with serious illness than women leaving men. Basically his girlfriend wasn't being insecure, so much as seeing a pattern of male behavior. Not saying the guy is completely wrong, just that some of his points are a bit idealistic for certain people. Though, I can't stop laughing at his example of the gal laughing at his joke in the drive through. For some reason people think good customer service is flirting. Dudes did this to me all the time is customer service, it's disgusting and annoying af.

[@Michael69]

This episode was great. Very mind exploratory and overwhelmingly optimistic. Many thanks for what you do, Steven. I'll definitely be showing my gratitude monetarily.

[@johnnybravo1041]

Steven, I am currently involved in a huge mess of biblical proportions. Stuff I thought was only possible in fiction. With regards to love, family, faithfulness, and life purpose, I am completely lost. I have come here for not only answers, but solace. Thank you

[@dik9091]

spot on regarding the relationship thing, I figured that out for myself a while back and came to the conclusion that what most people call love is just the urge to posses. There is only unconditional love and I think it does not exist, maybe between parent and child or between human and animals. All the rest is a contract, in which I am not interested anymore.

[@ryansmith6884]

Great video and amazing channel! You do such a great job with these.

[@familiarisfelinus4087]

I wish this podcast got more attention

[@mennyC64]

Didn't know this would be an advertisement for polyamoury😅, but I like your point, definatly something to think about!

[@unfortdork]

Is it really though? He sounds as though he is simply monkey-barring through relationships. He mentions staying in the old ones too long because he didn't go after a different woman, when really he should have just left the relationship, dealt with being alone for a moment, then met the new woman. To me he just sounds scared of being alone, not really poly.

[@bombasticnitzz2997]

Love this

[@LeNsChoas]

Just a totally random viewer but already listening to the second episode, it's nice to see how ppl enjoy philosophy.

[@UserName-ii1ce]

Overalls are actually trendy now, I attribute it to this episode

[@Michael69]

Steven West, Habitual Line Steppa and Trend Setta

[@bettersounds1926]

Yeah but if they feel like they’d be happier with someone else , do you keep letting them go back when they realize their best guess was wrong

[@Saleh.rahimi]

The only way for me to forget my insecurities is smoking weed.

[@Michael69]

I'm glad that works for you. If it improves your life and its surroundings, more power to you.

[@_PanchoVilla]

For three days of bliss, the vicious cycle is not worth it. Tolerance breaks are a b.

[@terminallychill3787]

This was a dangerous episode to drive to. Rip to the visual drivers out there

[@priyankawaghmode1728]

I found your comment interesting. I tried reading it again and again but couldn't understand. Probably cause I am not a native English speaker. Can you please explain? I am truly curious.

[@h.hholmes.492]

❤

[@christinemartin63]

The unique and exquisite are always alone.

[@eduardorabassallo3717]

This is an reupload, right? I swear i had listen to this (insecurity) episode before. Great work anyway

[@shahkhan2279]

Yes. He just posting the old videos again ....there is no new video

[@timmymorris91]

11:58 Heath Ledger’s Joker

[@VeggiesOutFront]

im giggling about asking jesus what he woul have for breakfast. imma ask the pastor i work with :)

[@carlcarlsberg5900]

It's either christ crispies, or fruit and moral fibre.

[@VeggiesOutFront]

@@carlcarlsberg5900 sadly I never asked him

[@vaibhavrai007]

Please upload the remaining episodes.. in here too.. Episode 70 -130 I meant..

[@XXTheMoleXX]

Stephen, is there no limit to what I should allow my significant other to do just because it makes them happier? Aren't they supposed to want me to be happy as well? If I allow my girlfriend to have her girl's night out as often as she wants and she begins doing it every night to the point where I'm left lonely and confused, is that something I should just allow because it makes her happy? What if I don't get to learn anything from this like you say would be so beneficial - what if she contracts an STD in all her running around and just doesn't tell me about it and comes home to spread it to me? Wouldn't it have been better in both cases for me to simply set some boundaries that we could both agree on before we began the relationship so that these things didn't happen in the first place? Love your channel btw.

[@JordanKeoto]

Then that would show that they care more about themselves than you and you should move on. It's not a big deal either way, if that's what makes them happy and you don't like it, find someone who doesn't do that. She's grown and can do what she wants as an adult, you telling her what she can and can't do is as this video states your insecurity You having all of these questions makes no sense. If that's a possibility in your relationship, then do as the video says, ask these questions up front. You can't force someone to see relationships the way you do. But it is absolutely your choice to stay.

[@XXTheMoleXX]

@@JordanKeoto It seems to me that this approach would require me to be a great judge of character so I could see these things coming BEFORE they happen. What if I'm not fully aware of the fact that she has these proclivities? Is it just "too bad, you should have seen it coming"? I don't think accepting literally any behavior she chooses is necessarily a good thing just because she's an adult - we don't accept murderers just because they're all grown up and can make their own decisions. I just don't understand this hard resistance to setting rules for one of the most important parts of your life, especially if this is done in with the consent of both parties. Now, it's possible that either part could simply break the rules of the relationship without the other knowing, but at least if rules are in place both parties know what will and won't be tolerated. If Stephen's girlfriend mentioned in the video had expressed her desire for him not to make other girls laugh on purpose before they began their relationship, Stephen could have opted out or accepted, avoiding the fight that the behavior caused.

[@gjorgjichepujnoski1696]

@@XXTheMoleXX What you are saying makes it seem that once you enter a relationship there is no way out and that it's over. You don't have to be a great judge of character or see things before they happen. At any time that you see a repeated behaviour in your significant other that you don't approve of, you have the option of ending the relationship. And added rules won't change the person they will just suppress that part of themselves. In the end you don't have to accept them but you do have to let them be themselves and be free. As for the murderers example we as a society don't accept them but you as a person technically have the freedom to commit such a crime.

[@XXTheMoleXX]

@@gjorgjichepujnoski1696 That's a fair point, but I would object by saying that suppressing behavior is exactly how we change for the better as people. If I am in a relationship with someone and I have a hot temper, is it better for me to simply let my anger go and say "if you don't like my repeated angry behavior, then leave me", or for me to try and manage my anger like a responsible adult? That would involve suppressing urges to lash out for the sake of the relationship - a rule that I must follow. I don't like this all or nothing mentality for relationships where we're not supposed to ask others to change at all. I think learning to change one's toxic behaviors is part of growing up and is perfectly healthy and desirable, and having a partner to help you change for the better is a big part of what makes relationships so great in the first place. Why simply end a relationship over a toxic behavior when you can work to improve it by setting and following rules and holding your partner accountable to do the same? Like why can't you just ask "Honey, could you please not do that thing because it bothers me?"

[@zikoho9713]

@@XXTheMoleXX yeah I agree with you. I was trying to understand his view point but it just seems like he was trying to justify cheating by shifting blame to the person who got cheated on by claiming the reason they are not ok with it is because they have insecurities.

[@OpheliaSHolmes]

you dont go on dates while dating someone though, that's not insecurity that should be common sense unless stated otherwise.

[@whatdupdoh]

"Its just a friend"

[@JordanKeoto]

It's only called a date by the person who's not going on it. If my gf wants to go out and eat with a male friend who and I to tell her no? Only a jealous s/o would call it a date.

[@lucidboi5334]

@@JordanKeoto Going out for dinner with another person could be both and it depends on the person going. If your girlfriend tells you she's been on a date with another dude, would you say: "Oh, he's just a friend."?

[@franciselrojo2922]

Aaaannndd, if you'd look up you'd see the point going far over your head. Define common sense. Suggesting there is some objective protocol which rules or ought rule over every individual relationship and calling it common sense is highly reductionist and philosophically bankrupt, like many appeals to so-called "common sense" tend to be.

[@SwainBjornstrandt]

Preach.

[@TheAlison1456]

I don't get his social reprisal point. Like, social reprisal for doing x is a bad thing, yes, even considering there's an opportunity cost involved in not doing X to avoid said reprisal, you're missing out on something you'd actually be happy with. Maybe you'd enjoy wearing the overalls, and maybe at least one person does too, but you would still be beat up and have tomato thrown at you, and that would give you a crippling fear of people for a long time. Not really a fair choice all things considered.

[@ingentingvirke]

So is it obvious to anyone else that Stephen's wife cheated on him?

[@derwandschauer]

Neeee, cheating is not okay. Wanting someone to be faithful is natural.

[@JordanKeoto]

It's not natural at all lol. You're just watching the video and not listening. It's OK either way, but the fact that you expect someone to know something without you actually telling them makes no sense. And it's as he said, you projecting your insecurities on them.

[@Tomek.adagietto]

@@JordanKeoto It's not that - doing something behind the back of other person (what really cheating is) is betraying the trust that this person had in you. It's not insecurity - it's expecting someone to treat you seriously, in the situation that you invest your time and feelings in relationship.

[@samuelgaudet8337]

Wait, you guys don’t have internalized debates on every small decision you make

[@qwertyuiop3656]

I can't stop myself and it's very exhausting

[@fabiancalderon6729]

Does your girlfriend have an onlyfans?

[@seanpatrickrichards5593]

I bet if you somehow removed money from society, alot of monogamy would go away :D Actually, I bet if you removed money then maybe half of all live-in relationships would dissolve :D

[@bettersounds1926]

Why do you say ?

[@TheAlison1456]

You have a point. If the current form of our trade system vanished abruptly, we would be too busy dying and warring in a feudalistic world to worry about any of that. It's bullshit to reduce people's lives and desires to relate to one another, especially to one person in particular, to "capitalism, man, it's evil"

[@ndo104no]

I find many of these examples unrelatable. Then again my life is not a normal one. Lol Your examples are a little to light hearted I guess.

[@TheRetsevlys]

I love listening to this podcast but I can’t help but notice the disrespectful way you describe janitors like in every story where a janitor is described he is described as “that creepy janitor” or belittled in some way. I deal with this stigma pretty regularly as a custodian and its offensive to me to hear this being perpetrated by someone who I admired. I’ll still listen to the podcast because of its incredible content but I thought you should take into consideration that you alienate some of your fans when you make character judgements based on someone’s 9-5. Not cool man

[@gabriellavandam1461]

Love this