ESxP Anxiety: Experience More, Organize Later!

[@Dappled543]

This speaks to something my husband and I have noticed is different about us since before I was ever into personality typing. When we need to buy something, my strategy is to explore every single option to find the very best one, and his strategy is just to look around until he finds one that is good enough and then buy that. Now that I know about personality typing, this makes total sense. I'm Di+Oe, so I'm all about exploring all the possibilities to find the perfect one, and I think he's either De+Oi or Oi+De, so he feels no need to do that.

[@dylonias]

Have you or he been typed? I know you said you're not sure about him, but just wanted to check. Not to add chaos to your figuring it out, but I wonder if it's more just the result of good old life experiences. I've been staring at myself and my parents - all three of us are Gatherers, but our methods vary widely depending on the thing itself, periods of life, circumstantial stressors, etc. This might be where things like gender socialization come into play. Just some Si for thought, it might be as simple as being influenced by the world around you 🙂

[@Dappled543]

@@dylonias Could be. I'm not sure how I'd be able to tell the difference, I guess. But I will say that this pattern isn't only in the way we buy things. These mentalities seem to pervade every aspect of our lives. Neither of us have been typed by Dave and Shan. I've been typed at cognitivetype.com as FiNe. The two systems are not the same, of course, and I imagine that I could be a different type in OPS than I am in CT, but I think at least that Di+Oe fits for me with Dave and Shan's definitions too.

[@scilines]

That Hillary music video is now stuck in my head. 😂😂

[@regalspork5434]

I can’t handle these memes, they are so amazing

[@Mayakran]

Reminds me of how my mom and I make decisions-we go shopping and I might browse a bit but I’m generally pretty focused and can be in and out fairly quickly, whereas my mom somehow derives PLEASURE from looking through every. single. option. to find the “best” one. She’s also been trying to paint the house and it’s taken her literally three months for a WALL COLOR (she asked my opinion and I deliberated for about half an hour).

[@kathrynb130]

If your mom is anything like me, she knows there are many options and doesn’t want to commit to painting knowing she would want a different colour later. I have had white walls, that I don’t even like, for two years since I bought my place simply because I like the idea of different colours more than the idea of doing anything about it. Yes, I hate my white walls and it’s easily fixed if I wanted: pick a random colour, paint and repeat the process of hating my wall colour, wanting to repaint blah, blah, blah. Tell mom to pick a colour and repaint when she hates it or just accept she won’t really like it anyway and she can skip painting all together by leaving it as it is. She will either fight you or laugh at how practical that is. If she’s like me, she will laugh and tell you you are right and probably shut up about it for awhile.

[@whocares3337]

what a hellish remix at the end :D

[@CrystalblueMage]

Hmm.. My Savior Ne drives me to want to be prepared for everything, and my Lead Ti means I cannot stop working on a potential problem once I know it's a possibility. And my Demon Fe fill me with anxiety if I let everyone down by _not_ being the miracle worker. INTPs are experts at being miserable at least.

[@qazplm3845]

Gosh that sounds difficult. I understand what that’s like, being saviour Ne and Ti, with demon Fe. One thing I can tell you is that you have to control what the tribe thinks of you. Be certain of your identity, and make sure that this is the person the tribe knows you to be. It seems like you’re currently stuck being known as “the fix it all.” And while that’s likely so far to be proven true as a lead Ti, in the end, no one can can do everything. You gotta change who people think you are, as not some “miracle worker” who always knows what to do, but just a human who tries their best, but also has limits on their knowledge and capabilities. Of course everyone should know this, but sometimes people don’t. They don’t know that what they’re doing is actually harmful, so it’s your responsibility to tell them to adjust their expectations. It’s also your responsibility to not see yourself as someone who can do everything. Personally for me, my ego is very connected to my Ti, and I feel like if I’m stupid/can’t do something then I’m worthless and nothing. That’s just another one of the lies your brain tells you. Humble yourself and realise that you’re not worthless to yourself or the tribe if you’re stupid. You are nothing more than human. I know this comment is a year old, but I hope this helps in some way!

[@CrystalblueMage]

@@qazplm3845 Yeah, you are absolutely right, though sometimes you have made stuff happen so often people stop listening when you say no and actually mean it :/ Anyways, its not smart to wait with holding up the stop sign till you start crackin' because - for me at least - there will be sudden and unexpected shouting involved, and it is always thoroughly embarrassing afterwards, even when needed and warranted. It's been a rough last few months, but I finally managed to put up a line and have people respect it, so that's good.

[@bumblyjack]

Consume-Sleep, Blast-last ENFP here. I only have the information half of this, not the need to experience everything. Still, the Blast suggestion near the end is interesting: categorize things and have standardized responses ready to go. I've seen Blasters do this; and it always makes me feel like I'm talking to their voicemail: "Hi, this is an automated response! I have calculated that you are making a request based on our friendship. Enjoy this fake smile and nod of agreement while I tune you out. Oh, and by the way, do not expect me to follow through with whatever I just agreed to. Have a wonderful day!"

[@blogoosfera]

In fact, the tip is very valid, as long as you have successfully formulated the problem. If you find yourself in a scenario of no certainty and very low governance, you will not be able to get out of the anxiety loop.

[@BREAKOUT444]

THAT ENDING!!!

[@HeyHey-ep9ld]

Aka all E....Ps slowly going mad in cuarantine.

[@LemonMeIon]

Right this is a perfect time for Ne doms. I’ve written many songs and have the time to focus on cooking and cleaning without distractions!

[@HeyHey-ep9ld]

@Mr. 8-Bit Doggo yes

[@HeyHey-ep9ld]

I've almost destroyed my wall. 😕😊

[@HeyHey-ep9ld]

@@LemonMeIon yes

[@kellikakes81]

This ExxP is thoroughly enjoying this quarantine, being able to enjoy me, myself, and I. We're awesome lol

[@eduardogabriel858]

In the past year I have been peacocking about "explore" and "new things" a lot, but I also realised that I feel more confortable mentally organizing my exploration first THEN actually explore ahahahahhahahaha

[@entropy8000]

Idk why i forgot bill clinton got old

[@tjizzle1027]

Just had a 30 second dance break on that end part. I dont get the meme but I enjoyed it nonetheless :3

[@hirsch4155]

Terrence Jackson I think the meme was meant to show that Hillary also didn’t foresee consequences, eg.’we came we saw he died’. Like she was just trying to show that what they did was bad ass hahaha, but didn’t take responsibility for the s*** show that resulted, then just trying to come off as likeable with that smile and laugh that’s being mocked in the meme, hoping to keep up the facade of her doomed candidacy. That’s how I took it anyway lol.

[@AubreeGames]

Im so scared of going down one path bc what if it’s the wrong one So instead I just live in a world of endless, complicated, stressful possibilities and never actually get anything done But I’m very knowledgeable ☺️ kind of

[@appletree6898]

Interesting and useful points, but what was that thing at the end?

[@LemonMeIon]

appletree whatever slightly relevant clip makes Dave laugh!

[@wattle2394]

Are you saying I need to clean my room, my car, etc? Is that it? Like Keep my side of the street clean?

[@cyberneticbutterfly8506]

I also find it interesting that Clintons phrasing there was interpreted as "Self above tribe" when the intention is clearly to help the tribes own selves gain some insight into human nature. If every instance of shared insight people try to give into human nature is interpreted as "Self above tribe" may that cause them to be mistyped?

[@AubreeGames]

I enjoyed that ending way more than I would have expected 😂

[@cyberneticbutterfly8506]

It's interesting how after focusing on Lewinski's side of things for over 20 years it's emotionally impossible for some people to say "Well ok but isn't it worthwile to understand how these things happen and what goes through the mind and how power affects the person who has power, and the stresses that are placed on the mind from that position?" Yet it's immediatly assumed that it's not enough focus on her as if 20 years of it never happen. People should walk and chew bubble gum at the same time without needing to place lengthy qualifyers before our sentences at all times.

[@trevorfrayne6418]

My lesson this morning from this video: Dave: Bullshit from the Tribe, I'm going to put it in this box. I might have not got that word for word.

[@vivianvennicia]

I love the end video. I forgot about that. DEAD!

[@CaveyMoth]

"Tiptoe through the tulips." Along with all of the tribe talk... Perhaps she's an ESFJ with savior Ne? XP

[@AskRach]

OMG these end videos are too funny.

[@handreieiacasa]

Great video guys as always. Love you.

[@Charmian-and-Iras]

I thought you were going to point out the complete opposite! How their non-verbal disengages with her, how they all lean away from her. Verbally, they might appease her, but their body language tells a complete other story.

[@dianadias3]

I understand why my boyfriend seems to not organize his time, and always complaints about not doing something he wanted because he was doing something else. I have just been telling hin to organize his time. But it is hard, since I also need help with my demon TE!!

[@danad401]

👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻 Good stuff!!

[@akaboo69]

It's not about tribe persay but Fe leads are affilliative valuing doing what is right. Bill is pragmatic so he does what works for him even if it's right or wrong

[@apollo1055]

Remix was fun to watch

[@simonmeehan362]

Best so far!

[@NGH99999]

Best. Ending. Ever.

[@kristy.]

hi are hillary clinton and carole baskin similar personality types they both creep me out the same way

[@chiara9721]

Kristy what about them is creepy? Just curious

[@LemonMeIon]

Oof ! Probably the lack of authenticity resulting from an extreme need of tribe validation. They both smirk while talking like the cringy kid in your classroom that won’t stop talking because he thinks everything he says is funny. Also the wicked laugh, usually following a condescending comment adds to creepyness.

[@chiara9721]

Lemon Sqeez hm, then maybe I’m tribe above self as well bc although Hillary is a bit off-putting at times, she doesn’t have that same creepy effect for me. Also wasn’t the ending comment just sarcasm? Perhaps reading into that too much? I don’t have context for that clip, so I could be wrong, but it didn’t seem too condescending.

[@kristy.]

Oof ! they both act like they’re hiding something. both of their smiles and laughs are just weird, like they’re trying to trick you into liking them. they both seem to be awkward when trying to be at all charming cus it’s so unnatural for them. yeah ig they both seem like they know they’re untrustworthy but they’re trying to hide that from you haha

[@LemonMeIon]

Oof ! I’m not going off of that clip, but everything I’ve seen from Hillary and Carole Baskin so far. Without citing specific examples, you can pick up a lot from watching mannerisms and usually at least tell if it’s way different than your decider behaviors. I would type both as ESFJs. I’ve also noticed when savior Fe doesn’t get the affirmation they need or they feel betrayed in some way, they can become quite vindictive/savage. This is why I typically stay off of social media altogether as to try not to piss off the De’s.

[@torilyn7181]

Is it like a bad case of FOMO? I get that bad and my sleep really suffers because of it.

[@Mayakran]

Tori Lyn I think I get it too. Let’s experience FOMO together! 😂

[@shaneaverystarr]

the unexpected bonus i got from the message came in the form of my realizing why as a Democrat I still didn't vote for Hillary.

[@נריהלוי-ר6ת]

can i ask if ti users doing things only Because they good at them And fi users can do and love things that they dont even good at ? In other words Ti users are Tougher on themsleves and on there dreams. Fi users Experience a closer relationship with the things they do ? I know that its Moving from human to human and its not exactly from person to pepole

[@נריהלוי-ר6ת]

Sory stupid google translate and stupid me

[@נריהלוי-ר6ת]

*sorry

[@cyberneticbutterfly8506]

The INTP strategy for life is to juggle *half a ball* at once. Underachievement forever!

[@yuliash6876]

if i plan a lot but not doing anything, does it mean i have demon ni?

[@goclbert]

Sounds more like lead or auxiliary Ne.

[@lavinder11]

I had an interesting moment with "the tribe" when they were discussing Clinton's interview, especially about the power imbalance. I said I would never apologize if I were him because the power imbalance *is* the attraction for relations like those for both (or all) parties involved. Needless to say, it was an awkward lunch hour. And why was a Hillary meme used rather than a Bill one? 😒

[@entropyfun]

Mr. Lolita Express.

[@einsame_Maria]

Someday ShowTimes is going to make a tv series based on the life and work of Shan and Dave. Just like Masters of Sex (It's an actual tv show, if you don't know it) And they're going to call it The Power of Personality 😏

[@hfortenberry]

What type is Hillary, for real? I just cannot accept that she's an INTJ like some people say. I think she's got to be an S. Maybe she's an ESTJ? She seems too closed-minded and traditional to be a high N user.

[@AntiAuthority55]

Wtf.......his voice seems changed

[@AntonyReed]

I just couldn't get through that last end bit. Way to annoying and cringy this round. The main video message, however, was great.

[@jerrytomas3136]

Brain Spanking U: Mind-Body-Awesome! Oh no your Di didn’t approve!

[@thetrickeryshorts2397]

@@jerrytomas3136 😆😆😆

[@LuanZeqiri1]

Gadaffi was an angel compared to Hillary hahah that meme was strong. Nice vid otherwise yes it's hard to be es.p in that aspect for me It's like a prison when there are so many things to do at once I do nothing..

[@emptydish6393]

First comment.

[@HeyHey-ep9ld]

When am ENTJ-Hillary goes on the maniacal mode.... Also pretty Harley Quinn(ENTJ?)

[@wewjoj]

wut

[@HeyHey-ep9ld]

@@wewjoj I think that Hillary Clinton is entj and that Harley Quinn is a messed up entj too and at first when I heard the clip at the end I thought that it was something with Harley. Basically it was a joke, if I explain this is no longer a joke so.

[@wewjoj]

Oh.

[@jankom.7783]

Hillary seems Fe. Wasn't the problem, that she had, that she ignored Te safety rules of her e-mails? I think Harley Quinn is ESFP, and BOP is about being forced to take control of her life (Ni-demon).

[@HeyHey-ep9ld]

@@jankom.7783 Harley was in total control before joker. And she kind of got feelings for him Fi? And then learned to screw up the tribe anti Te. Opposed to pleasing the tribe when she was appreciated as a psychiatrist. About Hillary, I dunno you might be right.

[@hunpo1]

Hilarious to see Monica portrayed in the media as a victim, esp in light of her admissions to Linda Tripp. Also, the reason you saw all 3 men agree with their co-host is that if they didn't go along with her, she'd call them misogynists. The need for critical thinking instead of personal bias is why the ancient Greeks rightly prioritized logos (logic and reason) over pathos (raw emotion) in the art of rhetoric. We should too.

[@oscarl.3563]

You could have left crooked Hillary out of it. That's not cool.

[@chiara9721]

Oscar L. Nah leave your political opinions aside, it was funny

[@djgranville]

Bruh looks old af

[@satoshinakamoto5710]

Narrative typing is really innaccurate.