Expanding Masculinity: Moving Beyond Boys Will Be Boys | Blake Spence | TEDxYYC

[@iunnbrynveig3309]

"Boys deserve more than 'boys will be boys'. " So true, I teared up listening to this. Thanks, (wise) guys for healing boys from that dangerous thing called the man box, and help them grow.

[@markrandall7221]

Thanks for sharing this Blake; for those who still hold onto the man up attitude times are changing and we are not asking men to feminise themselves but to recognise and acknowledge that being a man is a blend with some more to one side or the other in terms of masculinity.

[@TheWorldviewsProject]

Thank you for sharing an important solution that allows young men to explore how to have healthy relationships!

[@kylep7503]

I've always found there is strength in vulnerability.

[@tom-dahl1598]

''I am not trying to attack your identity, I am trying to defend mine, and my identity doesn't entirely fit within the confines of the 'current' definition of masculinity''. a comment buried within the threads here that sums up how i feel.

[@dano12ification]

This amazing! very powerful. Well done Blake!

[@matthewwalker3131]

these guys seem like they'd be fun to hang out with

[@acroyogawithdao7416]

important and authentic talk

[@Bangy]

This is good as long as they keep the safe spaces out of the hands of the government

[@manojpriyam5616]

Superb and wonderful great work most appreciable

[@ad2989-j3k]

Being honest about vulnerabilities is desirable in most contexts, but embracing vulnerability is not.

[@larryquick4324]

Something to lurn about. Love it.

[@AmbiCahira]

A plural, I love it!

[@lisaj5769]

this is beautiful!

[@sockysworld8010]

Nice!

[@tylerdurdensa]

This really bothers me. I believe there is an increasing trend of men becoming less and less masculine and that boys nowadays are less masculine than ever... do we really need to lower the bar for what is considered masculine? Rather than trying to re-define masculinity so that it encompasses feminine guys, I believe it would be much more helpful to teach guys how to be masculine and to feel secure about their masculinity. If guys are confident and secure, they won't feel the need to put others down. Let's help boys grow up into men that can be confident and strong and can thrive in adversity and meet all the challenges that life has to offer instead of trying to create this ideal world where it does not matter how feminine you are. Most boys nowadays don't have a right of passage that confirms to them that they are no longer boys, that they have grown up and are men. How will they ever be able to face the dog eat dog world if their whole life has been spent in "safe space bubbles"?

[@Tirannie]

Tyler Durden You're so right. People should conform to your expectations of "Man" instead of being themselves and expressing themselves with any variation from those expectations. I mean, it's not like men are more likely to commit suicide then women due to pressures they face trying to adhere to "standards" of masculinity that are impossible to meet, like never expressing or exploring their own emotions. Feminine characteristics are BAD! They're WEAK! I see the light!

[@tylerdurdensa]

Tirannie I am not saying that men should all conform to one standard. I am saying that we should not lower the bar to make them feel accepted. Just calling a feminine guy 'masculine' is not going to make him happy. The same applies to school grades for example: Just lowering the standards is not going to make kids smarter...

[@Ayatron34]

+Tirannie Where are your studies proving that's the cause of increased male suicides.

[@genellege]

I don't think the speaker is recommending that we call feminine men 'masculine' because that isn't true. I think he's meaning to open up what it is to be a man, allowing a mix of masculine and feminine traits to be OK, whatever the ratio. Some men are just naturally more masculine or more feminine - neither are better than the other. After all, they're both social constructs. IF you believe feminine traits are not valuable perhaps you should really look at what it is to be feminine or a woman - there are many strong traits to being a woman as there are a man. Woman have to give birth, an excruciating process, let along carrying a small human inside her for 9 months. Woman have to experience bleeding, bloating, stomach cramps and nausea for a week in every month for the majority of their lives etc etc. Men have other issues like being considered 'career objects' and are judged on how much money they make. They also are supposed to never cry or show emotions, which is just not human. We don't live in a world that is black and white like that - people aren't just male/masculine or female/feminine - people are complicated.

[@tylerdurdensa]

I agree that there are a lot of feminine traits that are valuable and that women that give birth deserve our respect and adoration. That being said, these feminine traits are not desirable in a man. It is the polarity between the sexes that draws men and women to each other. Feminine men will never be as desirable to women. Try as you might, you cannot force women to find feminine men attractive. Instead of trying to change society and the world, change yourself! Men can become more masculine! Men can lose weight and put on more lean muscle mass. They can take control of their lives and stop being wimpy and afraid. The way boys grow up makes all the difference...

[@cafla1219]

Just curious ,how is a gay men being masculine?How are you teaching young men to be a men ,because most gay men are feminine. It's just a question. Does not mean Im against homosexuality . Just curious. It does not make sense

[@AmbiCahira]

It shows it's okay to feel different, be different, and that there is diversity amongst individuals. :)

[@barbiechai2386]

no they are not

[@gerryt.8622]

Pure B.S. Bring back to Marlboro man!

[@cookiefacetwgirlxoxo5947]

None of this is b.s. men need to open up so they don't have to fake being strong