Eyes Like Daggers: Fangs As Sharp As Sarcasm pt 2 [sfw] [vampire x werewolf] [himedere listener]

[@light1528]

*Nash* "Im gonna take you to a movie" *Pumpkin* "We don't have time for that" *Pumpkins thought "What's a movie?"*

[@yourfavoritegenderbender9896]

"Youve lived a closeted life" *did you just out me?*

[@beanery8743]

I guess he did

[@markus6431]

Ed’s laugh is always the best sound in any audio

[@AgCACanty]

So true ❤️

[@crusher4557]

“i just wanted you to touch grass” IVE NEVER LAUGHED SO HARD

[@gergyta9211]

Alternative title: werewolf semi adopts a shut in vampire and teaches them about the world

[@literallydaisuke]

I hate how I'm exactly like Pumpkin with "I've never been outside" Literally inside 24/7 and barely goes out..

[@jonhwilson5522]

Nash: Nothing i just want you to touch grass. *laughs& Me: *drops onto the grass* Nash: pumpkin, what are you doing? Me: im tired of hearing your bullshit ... im gonna take a nap Nash: ... wow

[@blackiesheepie9754]

Him: We can convince him to leave Me: yeah i just want to talk to him *loads shotgun* Him: Wooo pumpkin put that down Me: i just want to talk

[@emilyb5307]

This is a gem! I can't help but picture their face as their former "prisoner" casually struts through the halls making small talk with the servants and openly calling their boss "Pumpkin". I could absolutely not keep a straight face for the life of me, because I could hear the smile in your voice...and I may have been in stitches within the first 30 seconds.

[@gren9834]

ed:“what am i a pile of rocks to you? *dad laugh*” the listener: 😐

[@ExtrovertED]

Sorry if my punchline didn't land. Still, thanks for listening

[@Natures_Soul_Dancer]

​@@ExtrovertEDI couldn't stop laughing and almost ruined my project I was working on 😅😅😅

[@bagotoast]

Don’t mind me, just gonna write something- “I’m gonna show you something. Take my hand, come with me.” Pumpkin looks down at Nash’s outstretched and frankly 𝘥𝘪𝘳𝘵𝘺 palm with a poorly concealed scowl, silently willing their hands and legs to stop trembling under the mountains of fabric laying on their shoulders. They find themselves taking a deep breath, knowing they didn’t really need it, steeling themselves with a frustrated sigh and finally reaching out to grasp his hand. Nash brings their gloved hand down to the green blades below, he makes sure to rest their palm firmly on the ground, his hold surprisingly gentle, then he gives them a knowing look. “You got my glove dirty for this? What’s so important about it?” Pumpkin asks, face scrunched up and looking up at Nash with a look that can only be described as contempt. “Oh, nothing. I just wanted you to touch grass.” To Pumpkin’s utter confusion and horror, Nash begins to laugh again, both at his own bad joke and the expression on their face. This is gonna be a long night…

[@literallydaisuke]

**intensely sips tea** i n t r e a g i n g

[@HaloCookie_]

Toast-- I cannot describe the level of awesomeness that is this writing! It's so good!! 😭❤️ You're crazy talented!! Take all my cookies 🍪🍪🍪🍪🍪🍪🍪🍪🍪🍪

[@bagotoast]

@@HaloCookie_ 😭😭 THANK YOUUUU I couldn’t stop myself from seeing it happen in my head I had to write it down, I would have been thinking about it all day otherwise 🤣❤️

[@hihellobyebai8556]

Aggressively sips this thank you

[@4isionaeri]

Omfg YOU NEED TO WRITE A BOOK

[@britnicox3929]

I like the fact that like we still kind of hate each other lol but also not really?? 🤣 slow burn enemies to lovers is so good, and I love Pumpkin being a small angy murder hamster of a person with zero life experience. It’s adorable! Can’t wait for that sweet sweet character growth Such a great addition! Good job ED~

[@yumizoomii]

Just the idea of the Vampire listener just boiling over in rage and wanting to rip Nash’s head off after every snarky comment he makes kills me. 😭😭 Hopefully he doesn’t go so hard on them for being so sheltered, they just need to learn a few things from the outside world. And I can already see them warming up to each other though it seems they may have a long way to go for a mutual understanding lol.

[@melissawoodall8556]

Me too!

[@catalinamyrrhpaw]

I'll be lurking for part 3 : )

[@Frostylurv]

I didn't think this could give me more serotonin and dopamine but then "touch grass" happened and honestly it might have cured some of my depression!

[@blackiesheepie9754]

funny he doesn't notice that pumpkin acts like this cause of the person that turned them. Cuz they technically become a child to the vampire that turned them. Pumpkin is so sheltered oof rip daddy is 2 protective. xD F And a germaphobe xD Go outside and touch grass xD.

[@Bunny_Boi24]

I’m just imagine if Pumpkin as completely clueless but mad and curious at three same time Btw LOVE the name Pumpkin

[@cheese_cake6836]

I relate to pumpkin on the "never been outside" scale of things cuz I'm a severe introvert and staying inside is just my thing

[@itztimetoanimate0186]

I'm pretty damn pessimistic in my own right, but this dude takes it to another level sometimes

[@wanderingrachael]

when the audio ends and you realised you were smiling the entire time 🤗🤍

[@doc.detective]

OH I WAS SO HEARTBROKEN WHEN YOU SAID "I call HER pumpkin" OHHH IT HURTS....

[@ExtrovertED]

it was an honest mistake... I should have edited it out. I have made efforts to remove pronouns from M4A audios.

[@caropaz5474]

Me trying to act the serious part but bursting into laughter with every joke you make… I look insane changing between being serious and laughing really loud. It was very entertaining 😂✨👌🏼

[@imperfect_star8025]

Idk why but I’m imagining that our sire/father like.. never let us leave the castle. Even as a child we weren’t even supposed to look outside. And he’s piiiissed that the only way we can get the werewolf is by us leaving. Also we weren’t aloud to like, be a kid either. And the only knowledge we know is from like 700+ years ago

[@konnorwithapen4527]

I appear to be late to the party, but I have already found this absolutely incredible and I eagerly await the next part.

[@ExtrovertED]

Oh, we ain't nearly even got started on this one. As of June 1st, I will have gotten started on making content again after recovering from a coma. I've been waiting on making more of this series for a long time.

[@konnorwithapen4527]

@@ExtrovertED Ah, I see. I hope you have a wonderful time through recovery!

[@Cardinal_claw]

Honestly I can definitely relate to Pumpkin about hating touching others. It's. Mildly obsessive and I know how to deal with it, but still! I don't know where you put that hand! Icky ick lol Also I've seen some theories that Pumpkin was turned during a plague and I absolutely *adore* that and am 100% behind it and (if you plan on discontinuing no pressure) cannot wait to see more of these two :D

[@n.c.pictures]

"I just wanted you to touch grass"- I CANNOT 💀🤣

[@Causallystupid]

I can’t even imagine a vampire with adhd cause that would be me

[@beanery8743]

Now wait-

[@elphieofkiamoko]

I'm definitely going to fall back asleep before this premieres, but I'll be back as soon as I awaken again~ Edit: "I put one little compliment in a string of insults and you just don't know what to do with yourself." ED *STOP CALLING ME OUT.* "I hope your sire has a sense of humor." Given how Pumpkin is, I'm betting...no xD I love that he's friends with the servant who fed him, omg. I JUST WANTED YOU TO TOUCH GRASS I'm *crying.* But ok, you know how animals react to touching grass for the first time? What if, like Buried deep beneath the annoyance, a memory drifts through their consciousness of before they were turned. Before they became all they know now. The soft tickling off the grass and the coolness of the soil--not cold and unyielding, like the stone that comprises their home, but fresh-scented and soothing to the touch--draws them back into a time of running barefoot through fields, sunshine soaking their skin and the tall grapevines slapping their face as they wove through the vineyard. They can remember strong arms enveloping them, and someone not their Sire--someone who laughs, and loves--scoops them into the air and spins them playfully. They can still feel the vibrations of the laugher against their frame, and it takes a beat too long to realize that the laugh they feel belongs to Nash, not this forgotten person long since gone. They pull their hand away quickly--there is no point in returning to that place. It is all dead, now. Even *they* are dead, now. But they survived. They became something else--something stronger--in order to survive. If they want to keep surviving, there's no going back, now. **side-eyeing Patreon** My broke self really, reeeeeeeally wants a series, my dude. I might have to pawn something XD

[@bagotoast]

Okay that whole grass bit was brilliant, the remembrance of what it meant to them when they were alive, young and happy. The fact that they can no longer experience that happiness and they push it away, stating it doesn’t matter, it’s over, it’s time to move on. *And* the fact that you made the connection of someone’s laugh (someone who they loved when they were alive) to Nash’s laugh was absolutely amazing, I feel inspired just from reading it! We both had very different takes but I like yours the most- 🤣

[@elphieofkiamoko]

@@bagotoast omg I went back to the first chapter because I wanted to check something and I had another Thought and I made myself sad so suffer with meeeeee?? According to the first audio, they haven't left the castle in 700 years, which means their turning coincides with the early to mid 1300s, which is also when the Black Death decimated the European population. Imagine having seen whole families--whole villages--wiped out by the plague. Imagine seeing rosey patches appear on your own skin and knowing soon your fingers and toes will blacken and your mouth and nose will begin to bleed. Imagine being so desperate to save your own child that you take them to the one group of people you know won't be killed by the plague, because *they're already dead.* Imagine begging them to take in your child, promising them anything--everything--you have to give if they'll only make sure your little one *survives.* Imagine kissing their forehead one last time. "It's alright, my love," you say, wiping away the faint trace of blood you leave on their forehead. "They'll take care of you. You'll be safe." They start to cry, but you walk away with a smile. You, like your spouse and your neighbors, are doomed, but your child will live. They will be treated like royalty, safe behind stone walls. They'll do what it takes to survive.

[@bagotoast]

@@elphieofkiamoko That… Lee you might be a God. That’s such a great connection. I’m actually losing my mind right now! Would they remember those times though? If so, would it be enough to effect how they view regular sickness? Like you said, they haven’t been outside in A WHILE, definitely not enough to hear about something *primitive* as the common cold, especially it’s symptoms. They wear gloves all the time to keep germs from spreading, they’re like a MASSIVE germaphobe. Maybe Nash gets a slight cough and runny nose and they’re just *freaking out* internally, subconsciously keeping their distance and not touching him or anything he’s touched while being sick, it’s complete paranoia on their part. I absolutely love bouncing off these ideas with you, genuinely. I think I could do it all day- 🤣❤️

[@elphieofkiamoko]

@@bagotoast akfjakfjakfjakf definitely not a god, just a fellow writer and major history nerd, lol! I promise, if anyone ever drops any audios based on historical pirates or the French Revolution, I will be ready to go *off* XD BUT OH MY GOSH YES. Imagine the first thing they did was clean off the filthy, grimy human and cement the connection between cleanliness and safety. So it's not just that Nash (and people in general, but he's the one they're interacting with most) is *dirty,* it's that he's *contaminated.* If he so much as sneezes, they just, slooooowly scoot as far away as they can on the bench of the carriage. XD Omg, same, like I'm already brimming with more Nash being sick nonsense to share um um um OH OH we're both on Discord, right? We can continue in DMs there? Or on Twitter, which I think also has a DM function (I am clearly still a Twitter n00b)? I'm literally always down for this xD

[@azure914]

Super excited!!

[@lotus4487]

This was amazing Ed. You are amazing. keep staying brilliant for us. Thank you

[@minnie6697]

I mean this in the best way possible, but your character is such an arsehole omg I love this XD

[@amberrr_misss]

Yes can't wait!

[@bisibisera5551]

im loving this so much thank you for this 👨‍🦲‼️

[@Sarah-rb5mp]

I. Love. Every. Bit. Of. This.

[@HaloCookie_]

This is gonna be so awesome!!!!!! I can't wait 😁 Have a cookie 🍪❤️

[@Luesium]

Another fantastic character Ed, well done!

[@Hannahmarie5932]

Another wonderful audio! I already love this series

[@assassin1012]

Loved it

[@riomeow]

i really love these characters id love to see more of them ^^

[@Rio.o.o]

PART 3 WHEN IT'S BEEN 2 YEARS

[@ExtrovertED]

Part Three is out

[@sedentarybeing]

😂 i love Nash and I love being the stuck up one for a change. Can’t wait for pt 3!

[@yoyo-534]

I laughed so damn hard that i watched the video millions times i liked how nash try to dirty the listener hand's on the ground and then laughed (i like this laugh tho🤏🏻💞) i hope there will be part 3 soon😭🤏🏻💞

[@i-just-want-to-graduate027]

We need part 3!!!

[@Annas-nc9hy]

This was amazing can't wait for the next one.

[@atlesadams6227]

He's so sassy I can't😂

[@starz_frommyheart]

I love this series!!! Although I am veryyyy late!!! I hope that I am able to heat another part!!

[@BooksInTheVoid]

I said his name was Marcus I was close! 😂 that should count as knowing a servant.

[@doodlepoodle]

Hey make part 3 I loved it

[@teo_tavern]

Oh Oh this is marinated in snarkiness And I'm here for dinner.

[@skellybeeb]

I think I’m really gonna like this series. 🥰😂

[@jasper_tw]

when r we gonna get part 3 😭

[@Earthy_kaii]

Part 3?

[@1Katakana]

👏

[@gravityrose]

Hilarious!!❤️❤️