Fat Activism vs. Reality (1000-lb Best Friends)

[@KianaDocherty]

How do you think fat activists would react to Vannessa's story? 🤔 There's something for everyone! Go to www.casetify.com/kianadocherty today to save 15% off your order!

[@CaptBrightside89]

They'd brutalise her. Which is why its so important that communities like the one you're building here rise up to support and encourage positive choices.

[@mamawray]

I am more interested to know how Vanessa would respond to FAM.

[@kindkendracreates]

Call her fatphobic and not body positive for trying to erase her fatness. 😂

[@wildlightarts]

I have no insight into the mind of fat activist other than watching a few videos of activists referenced on your channel. I can't imagine how anyone can not love Vanessa. Her bright light despite all her life's challenges is beautiful, inspiring and she is clearly someone who brings joy to others around her.

[@CordeliaWagner]

The "Spreading Love" people will attack her. Insult her, shame her. Shower her with all their hate.

[@amagab2346]

“If calories didn’t exist emotional eating would still be a problem because it is an avoidance mechanism” - this is absolute gold

[@ChiasmMarksTheSpot]

🎆🎆🎆🪄🪄🪄🪄 Stunning and magical. I paused the video and let this realization wash over me.

[@__m-a-x__]

truly. gold. the only way to grow in life is to reflect on and address your own cope.

[@lelegus7732]

Exactly, at least in my opinion a healthy coping mechanism has to be something that helps making you calm, understand your feelings, make you less desperate, etc. before it's time to address a situation, not a way of deflecting your problems.

[@LL-wj6yw]

It would just be a hobby, just like reading novels is.

[@farcenter]

Bingo

[@JudelovesRiver12]

When Vannessa told her son “I failed you,” that was so touching it made me emotional. Most parents would never admit that to themselves, let alone admit it to their child.

[@CordeliaWagner]

That was the move that gained her respect for REAL Positivity. It's not about sunshine and rainbows and lies.

[@BB-gf6wf]

that was so important. so many obese parents raise obese children because to put their child's health as a priority would mean accepting their own responsibility for their state. it's giving your children lung cancer from secondhand smoke because it's yOuR RiGhT to constantly smoke around your children in between handing them cigarettes. HAES would rather ruin their own children's lives with their excess than accept that's what ruined theirs. it's sick.

[@5-1biggiebagextrafries]

So true❤ I got a little choked up hearing it❤

[@KianaDocherty]

100 percent. And that was her first instinct too. She is truly such a gem 🥺🥺

[@livyann2143]

When my addict father who came back into my life (clean) his ability to admit he hurt me, failed me and he can't change the past is what actually spurred us having a relationship again. Taking responsibility is really fucking hard, but it is 100% worth it for yourself and those around you. I still struggle with self accountability, but seeing Vanessa saying that, and what my dad has said have been an inspiration.

[@MaybeitsmeJulia]

"By losing weight you are erasing a possibly fat body" Lass, I'm erasing joint pain, pre-diabetes and whatever the hell is happening to my skin. Down 10kg and more to go!

[@leifmeadows3782]

You can do it!

[@gokux75]

Good for you. I lost 60 pounds years ago and have never felt better. No shame in erasing my fat body lol.

[@KorahCasey]

👏👏👏👏

[@JohnL9013]

Hell yeah, good for you!

[@leonaheraty3760]

Keep up the great work! 😊

[@opalskycanvas]

If you’re overweight you can “accept” yourself. You can wear cute clothing in your size. You can wear makeup and style your hair. You can be proud of yourself. You can feel comfortable in your own skin. You can love and accept yourself. You are worthy of love and respect. You can be a public figure. You’re just as valuable as an average weight person. But all of that has nothing to do with your health. Being overweight has countless harmful effects. Taking responsibility and losing weight won’t make you less “body positive” You can love yourself throughout the entire journey.

[@arnoldfreeman2885]

It’s why I’m very careful with my wording when criticizing the fat acceptance movement. Fat phobia is real and beauty standards do need a reckoning and the media does sell lies about body image. But none of that justifies being pro-fat.

[@starlette7820]

@@arnoldfreeman2885 Also people need to stop equating fatphobia to racism, homophobia and ableism because it just aint the same. I am a fat person and i've been fat for a long time, but the level of poor treatment I receive is nowhere near on the same level as someone who has experienced racism, ableism or homophobia. For one thing, you cannot change your race, your disability or your sexuality, but I can lose the weight any time I so choose as long as im willing to put the effort in. Even if we do get mistreated by the medical field and we get bullied for our weight, it is not the same as being treated as subhuman, or even being murdered or assaulted for being black, or being gay or trans, or being tormented and called ugly or stupid for having horrible burns you can't get rid of or for missing a limb or having a mental disability. I genuinely have nothing but resentment for this "movement".

[@CainXVII]

I have a close friend who is clearly overweight. She really owns it. Hair dyed, tight clothes, the whole outfit. She always looks stunning. Nothing wrong with loving your body, but don't shame people who want to change. I mean, I am nonbinary and want to look more masculine, would you shame me for changing a body that "had potential to have curves"?

[@JanieBee]

Agreeed. Accept the whole worthy of respect. You don’t just get respect for existing. You gotta earn it and command it like everyone else

[@JanieBee]

@@arnoldfreeman2885 fat phobia is not real. It’s biology. Humans are inherently repulsed by unhealthy things. We don’t get just get turned off by fat people. When you see someone who’s extremely skinny like a skeleton, or someone obviously sickly and diseased, someone who’s on drugs and looks crazy, etc. these traits/lifestyles in people are unattractive for a partner and obviously we don’t want that for ourselves. Our brains are always trying to survive so we are subconsciously disgusted by things that are unhealthy because they lead to death. No one just sat in a room figuring out the formula to make the entire world avoid being fat and want to discourage it. We should discourage obesity. Most people who were extremely obese and got fit say that part of their motivation was people making fun of them and/or not wanting to be with them romantically. And that’s good! If nothing in society keeps us in check, or makes us feel shame, we just run wild doing whatever just feels good. And most things in the world that feel good and are easy are plain horrible for you.

[@marzemarcel9529]

THAT WOMAN IS BODY POSITIVE!!! She's accepting and aware of her issue and is being nice and caring to her body while still choosing the better path for her and her kids.

[@mrsigmatic1967]

Vanessa is an example of genuine body positivity. She hates her obesity and its impact on her body and health, but loves her body, she doesn't conflate the two. She also takes full responsibility for her health instead of creating excuses. Let her inspire us all to love ourselves and not be ashamed of who we are, but also to strive for health and for our wellbeing specifically because we love our bodies and not out of hate for it.

[@KianaDocherty]

Preach 🙌

[@gethina-come7885]

RIGHT ?!

[@johnjamele]

meh, at the moment it's just talk. Talk is cheap. Let's see what she looks like a year from now and what her habits are a year from now.

[@marlyd]

@@johnjamele to a certain extent sure. But mental health and addiction aren't just something you can just improve regardless. I have lost a significant amount of weight between 2013-2015, like 65lbs. Never thought I'd relapse. Then I got dumped a month before lockdown and within 2020 I gained 20lbs back. I've only now been able to get back to eating more normally and exercising regularly and I have no idea what happened to get me back on the track I have been trying to get back in since 2020. I just crawled out of my hole somehow. And disclaimer, I've been in therapy since 2017 and am constantly working on bettering myself and putting in the work. But bodies and brains are weird man, sometimes it's just not happening.

[@gemstar7286]

Yeah anyone who promotes obesity i will never have time for , whereas if someone actually acknowledges their problem & flaws .. and realise they need to change for their health then that's a little different . The FA movement will never show you the depressing side of being obese , where they're struggling to carry all that weight around , where they're out of breath just from walking up the stairs or walking down the road. The FA instead will vomit out false misinformation to glamorise over eating and staying lazy , as some sort of empowering positive thing... which is really damaging 🙄🤦‍♀.

[@thund3rstruck]

"By losing weight you are erasing a possibly fat body" In my case, losing weight erased my high blood pressure, high blood glucose, high cholesterol, and prediabetes.

[@snu3877]

Early death also erases a fat body. They don't mention that, though.

[@andreaberryman5354]

Oh-and you rid the planet of one fat body. Lol

[@daniellenelson5300]

Me too my blood pressure was like 160/80 when I was obese, my blood pressure now (if I don't go to the dr after having caffeine) is on average 115 to 120/32, one of my coworkers is a bigger lady and she said her blood pressure is like 180/90 & she can't bend down without seeing stars because of it, I get like that sometimes but because of an iron deficiency that I take supplement for

[@lucaradu3343]

Good for you. I work in Healthcare and it's really sad seeing someone in their 40s eat themselves into an early grave.

[@suchablurryface8570]

This sentence made me so mad like huh? She made it sound like it's such a bad thing... body positivity means LOVING your body, and if you love yourself, you'd want the best for yourself and your health. The mental hoops these people jump through to justify anything is just astonishing

[@muldersimp2052]

"by intentionally losing weight you are erasing a potentially fat body." THIS is body policing. I get to do whatever I want with my body.

[@leika2589]

Isn’t that statement a good thing? No hate just confused. I’ve always had a thing athletic body and don’t understand why avoiding a potentially overweight body wouldn’t be a good thing

[@montymolemmn]

@@leika2589unfortunately it’s not meant in the way you’ve interpreted it - the person saying the statement sees erasing the fat body as a form of “fat phobia”, and that it’s wrong to try and lose the weight and discriminate on the fat version of your body - honestly it makes no sense but that’s how delusional some of these people are!!

[@yyZiggurat]

@@leika2589 "Erasing" is used in that statement as in denying a fat person's existence. As if a person exists in a fat body or not at all. They see fatness as the defining mark of their identity.

[@dented_riddles9967]

Exactly. If I want to work out and bulk up (I'm a guy) and lose some fat, that's none of your business. I'm not judging *you* (though I might be concerned for you, I don't think you're less-than if you're bigger).

[@redd1th]

Said differently, "by gaining weight you are erasing a potentially healthy body that won't load our health care system, won't cause you pain and diseases, and a functional part of society" these "activists" are just excuse generators to eat whatever the fk they want. No accountability.

[@mael2039]

Seeing her at the beach in that bikini, being so genuinely just happy to be there, enjoying the moment. While also accepting that she failed her son, that she is taking accountability, she's making changes. That's true body positivity. That's what it should be like. We need more people like her.

[@judeevans8303]

Wow. This lady has body positivity enough to go to the beach in a bikini while being aware of her problems with weight and food. Thats actually incredibly inspiring ngl

[@marknewton6984]

Ugh!

[@blossom1643]

“Incredibly inspiring”??? What does that mean ? Should I go out & Get Fat??

[@Hello___there]

@@blossom1643tell you’re purposely missing the point without telling me

[@blossom1643]

@@Hello___there Oh. Ok what is the point??

[@Hello___there]

@@blossom1643 that you can still love your body and be confident while knowing you need to change and actively becoming better????? It’s pretty obvious my guy

[@aliecarey]

"Obesity isn't real" is one of the crazier things I've heard in a long time

[@Rottnwoman]

Mine was REAL. A BMI of over 42 was too real! My BMI is now just under 31 and dropping steadily - NO Pills, NO surgery, just 1200 calories a day, EVERY day. I am 75 years old. UPDATE! I hit a BMI of 29.9 just before Christmas -no longer obese, now just plain FAT 😆

[@rajatshakya1570]

@@Rottnwoman hey that's awesome... Wish you lot of love💕

[@ozymandias7372]

@@Rottnwoman congrats 🎉 i am happy for u for achieving this milestone 😊

[@allid3231]

@@Rottnwoman you're doing fabulous!!! This stranger is very proud of you 💕

[@Bumbledora]

Yeah I reacted to that too. Talk about delusional.

[@gildedpeahen876]

As a recovering heroin addict, I see the same self delusion in the addiction. When Vanessa described food as her lover…that is the absolute best way to make someone understand what addiction is. Your lover-hot and cold, abusive, narcissistic…your best friend-who stabs you in the back. Your everything.

[@Angelkisses444]

this is off topic, but I wish you the absolute best in your recovery. good luck!!

[@olliebearblu7783]

this is probably tmi but I felt the same thing with my cutting addiction, I suppose it goes all across the board for food, drugs, self harm, any addictions.

[@trevorprice1867]

Best friends when I had a fat bag sitting in the drawer, worst nightmare the moment that bag was empty. I am so glad my heroin days are over. Best of luck to you!

[@kj-pn8ll]

"The *cause* and *solution* to all life's problems"

[@gildedpeahen876]

@@Angelkisses444 🙏🫶thank you

[@SimBits]

I'm technically overweight according to my BMI, but I was anorexic for years and now I feel way better than I ever did. You can hold extra weight on your body and still be healthy, but being morbidly obese will never be healthy for anyone. We can not want to be overweight while also not vilifying fat people

[@yeet-viewer3029]

Correct! And also let's not forget that fat-shaming and unsolicited weight-loss recommendations actually push healthy people into yoyo dieting and make them become overweight. I lost weight and gained it back more than I lost for 4 times in my life. This is in no way healthy. And when I started losing weight for the first time I had normal BMI, but still believed that I'm ugly because of all that fat-shaming pressure from everywhere around.

[@Riyaanreality]

Yes, there’s a big difference between being slightly overweight and being obese. For example, a lot of athletes and bodybuilders are “overweight” but that weight is pure muscle mass.

[@therealcarlxii]

I´m technically overweight acc. to BMI scale but I´ve also got visible abs and biceps veins so I´m lean enough. Makes a difference if the weight comes from fat or muscle.

[@carochan86]

I really think it should depend more on body type and height to determine a weight standard. Bmi is a generic calculation used for men.

[@exginto8053]

I'm technically overweight but i can bench my bodyweigth so i don't care.

[@Yackneria]

When she went to her son and told him "I failed you as a mother" I immediately paused the video and went to my mom and thank her for helping me with my binge problems and over eating. I'm very happy Vanessa is doing great! 💗

[@amlugonnen5106]

Her saying "I don't wanna hurt after 5 minutes of excercise" hit me like a truck because that is all I think about when I go for walks and runs. I used to be fit, now I am overweight because of poor decisions and injury with messed up lungs due to covid. I don't want to hurt while just existing. Vanessa is an inspiration and I watch this video whenever I need help staying motivated.

[@diannholland]

WOOOOH She actually said she can't have a heart attack in peace because people will say it is because she is fat??? What the actual..... Stunned. Just, stunned.

[@ekaterinab6064]

she's not wrong

[@BlisaBLisa]

yeah shes not wrong... i could be missing some context and she means something else but yeah if she has a heart attack people will go "well what did she expect" and be less sympathetic. people are unfortunately much less sympathetic to people whos sicknesses were caused by them, like obese people

[@rosalina2773]

@@BlisaBLisa yeah similar attitudes towards drug addicts.

[@leifmeadows3782]

I didn't know it was ever possible to have a heart attack in peace? It's kind of a medical emergency, those don't tend to be peaceful...

[@ouhhoh]

@@BlisaBLisa I think the stunning part of it is how she claims that she's perfectly healthy at her size, she doesn't need to make any lifestyle changes, etc etc. it feels like constantly telling someone "stop putting your hand in the lion's cage, you'll get bit" they respond with "putting my hand in here is literally fine, you cagephobes" and then say "if I ever get bit, you all are gonna blame it on me putting my hand in" not a perfect metaphor, it's entirely possible to have a heart attack for different reasons, but we can't act like being that overweight doesn't greatly increase the chances. even if it's not the main cause, it's still a significant contributing factor. idk, that's just my thoughts. not to say she, or other fat people, don't deserve genuine sympathy and kindness, but at a certain point the complete denial of any and all heath risks is... a bit much

[@marleyBsalinas94]

The fat positivity movement makes me so mad because my grandmother would do anything to loose weight but can’t because of a calcified thyroid that she didn’t know about until it was too late. She is completely dependent on my grandfather. If she falls she can’t get up on her own. Her whole body hurts. It literally kills me when she cries because she can’t do something. These people have perfectly capable bodies to loose the weight but are so delusional and don’t realize once they’re old they won’t be able to live actively.

[@aliecarey]

Thyroidectomy is not an option? That's so sad

[@joosoo]

@@aliecarey I think the implication is that the calcified thyroid has permanently affected her body? I could be wrong.

[@tristantries9211]

@@aliecarey surgery could too risky at her age

[@marleyBsalinas94]

@@aliecarey unfortunately I don’t know if that has been discussed as an option. She’s almost 80 now so I don’t know if getting that done would help her loose weight at her age.

[@aliecarey]

@@marleyBsalinas94 I'm sorry to hear that and yes at that age I would imagine it's not an option any longer ❤️ Like you said it's crazy that people with perfectly capable bodies would choose this path for the future.

[@BluemoonLacrymosa]

One of the issues I have with the movement is that they almost bully people who are trying to lose weight. They say everyone should be happy with their body and do what they want, but only if its to eat whatever or not workout. They bully people wanting to lose weight while living in a delusion that the high weight is not detrimental.

[@alexandersotomurillo5795]

The only movement that boots the ones who move

[@miaomiaou_]

It’s because if they see that someone is capable of losing weight and living a healthy lifestyle, then it really isn’t impossible! A lot of these “activists” just want everyone to be fat so they don’t have to accept that their weight is their own responsibility

[@moonstruck8245]

Yep, so much hypocrisy. "You should love your body! Be happy, and do what you want, live the way you want! ....What? What are you doing? You want to live your life healthier and be able to go on long hikes or bike rides or mountain climb or just feel better and stronger in general and not be puffing like an overclocked steam engine from climbing up a single stair? HOW DARE YOU TRY TO LIVE THE WAY YOU WANT!!! YOU'RE FATPHOBIC AND WANT TO MURDER ALL FAT PEOPLE!!!" It seems like, of all people in the world, the fat activists are the ones who can't separate a person being a person from how much fat they have on their body. They act like if you lose weight, you're murdering a fat person, when...the person is still very much there? Just healthier and feeling better about themselves?? All that's gone is the fat, not the human being.

[@moonstruck8245]

@OdinsSage Absolutely this. They don't want to admit that they COULD do it and are just being lazy and not putting in the effort, they want it to seem impossible so why even try - so they try to stop others from proving that yes, it totally CAN be done.

[@laurahughes8902]

Gatekeeping fatness is wild. I’m on the fence. I’m too big to be skinny and too small to be fat. I’ve been told many times how I should feel about my body but I know how I feel when I look in the mirror (bad) and someone telling me I’m not allowed to feel uncomfortable is crazy to me. It happens a lot

[@Anna-jh7iy]

Same. I'm about 30 lbs overweight and when I tell people I'm trying to lose weight and be healthier they go "WHY?? YOURE SKINNY". M'am. I have tons of rolls and a sugar addiction. I'm not skinny.

[@JayyCobb]

​@@Anna-jh7iy Or they'll say something like "But it looks good on you." or "You wear it well.". I can relate to wanting to share and find encouragement but more often than not, negative responses seem to prevail. I say keep striving to be the best version of yourself and don't let the opinions of others discourage you from trying!

[@OpalLeigh]

Ugh beauty standards are truly like running on a hamster wheel 😭 I lost 50 pounds, but I’m vegan and struggle with eating enough protein (boo lentils) so now I’m skinny fat 😂 this is where I think body positivity is totally legit. We will never be perfect and deserve to enjoy our lives now:) but it’s also ok to want to take care of your body 🤷🏻‍♀️I have a medication I have to take that LEACHES calcium from my bones, so weight training is important for my body:) aesthetic or not.

[@tierrashanice6299]

Same here, I am 5'6 and 200lbs mostly because of my pregnancy and continuing the way that I was eating during my pregnancy. I'm not fat enough that the average person would call me a fat pig or try to bully me, but I am overweight nonetheless and it's frustrating when people act like I can't feel this way because I'm "normal looking". I'm actively losing weight and idc how people feel about it or if they don't think I need to.

[@bostonb4kedbeans]

Same here!!! Not morbidly obese but not skinny either although I've been at both

[@TwilightSpeaker]

I don’t know why, but at the end when I saw how much weight she’d lost, I got really emotional. She’s an inspiration and I’m glad she turned her life around.

[@EL-wd8kw]

I think Tess Holiday believes if she feels any little hunger pang and doesn’t eat she’s automatically starving herself. 🤦🏻‍♀️

[@ekaterinadzyubak197]

Yup, that's what I think when I hear that bit of the interview. She is completely unaware that feeling hungry is normal and a good thing. You can feel hungry for an hour or two and not die, it's fine..

[@ReginaApple007]

She knowingly just lies constantly because she's a sociopath and gets off on the attention

[@catgirl6803]

And if you eat a carb heavy diet, you're always hungry. So she probably feels like she's anorexic just because she's trying to resist the next sugar loaded/ carb loaded junk food.

[@pablosilva6932]

I think that most clowns sorry fat activists believe that, that's why so many of them have recovered from "eating disorders"

[@carochan86]

I don't think she knows what hunger pain is? You really want to give Tess Holiday that much credit?

[@melissam6037]

Vanessa is in her 40’s and a lot of the fat acceptance people are in their 20’s. Binge eating disorder is a progressive disease that gets worse over time. I tried to lean into the HAES concept when I was younger and only moderately overweight. Whelp guess what, after more years of binge eating my weight to eventually crept up to the morbid obesity category. Knee pain, getting out of breath doing basic tasks, etc. I started eating healthier and exercising last year. It’s been an up and down struggle, but I’m down 40 pounds and continuing to work on myself. And I still love myself and feel good about myself! I do fun exercise I like (dance, walking, hot yoga) think of eating healthy and tracking calories as self love!

[@graycola]

that is incredible!

[@SmallSpoonBrigade]

I think it's unfortunate that people think that it's impossible to see the obese as being people who have value without thinking that it's f-ing stupid to do that to your body.

[@bananawitchcraft]

This is really a good point. A lot of people at that age are also trashing their bodies with drugs, cigarettes, etc. because they can't feel the physical consequences yet, and often their brains aren't fully developed. Young people are wired to take risks and feel invincible. By the time it starts catching up to them, it's often too late. Becoming chronically ill in my early 20s literally saved me from a spiral of drug abuse.

[@Gaia_Seraphina]

Indeed. When I got morbidly obese in my mid-20s due to psychological problems I still felt physically relatively well for a while. Except of hard breathing while climbing stairs. Ten years later - still being obese, although not morbidly anymore - that started to change. And now in my early 40s I have some health problems not even my skinny mother has. That's cuz I am still overweight, borderline obese. I felt so much better when I managed to reach my normal weight although that weight didn't last long, cuz I did it with strict food restriction and a lot of sport - not sustainable in the long term ( however I never reached obesity anymore again, even if I was close ).

[@nyxiepyxiepoo]

You got this!!! Love your attitude ❤

[@libbyjameswatt4111]

The rage I feel every time I see Tess Holliday’s face is beyond words. As someone whose literally been in ED hospital wards and lost people to AN, I’ve never wanted to slap someone more

[@MusikGirl23]

I feel the same way. I nearly died from AN, several of my friends have nearly died from AN. Tess I am sure has issues with food, but it’s not AN.

[@Itsjess505]

Couldn’t agree more. As someone who never got down to skin and bones with my atypical AN, her claims make it so much harder for people like me to seek help. Thank goodness I recovered before all of that nonsense 🙄

[@rosalina2773]

Same it’s actually appalling. Anorexia is not just not eating enough. Its a severe mental illness and not something you then just “get over” by eating more again, as she seemed to imply. People with BED often go through periods of not eating enough before binging again, which seems far more likely in Tess’ case given she’s mentioning binging before. Whoever told her she has anorexia (if that even happened) should lose whatever license they have. Absurd.

[@leifmeadows3782]

@@rosalina2773 I completely agree. I could believe she starves herself and then binges, but I absolutely am not seeing anything that would indicate clinical Anorexia Nervosa.

[@probablynot2123]

Slap? Damn you’re nice…I would do more than just slap her..

[@cheshirekat8273]

The Fat-Acceptance movement used to be about asking Society to stop treating overweight people like sub-humans. It was about asking people to stop bullying overweight strangers on the streets, demanding affordable, fashionable clothing and things like fatphobia in the medical field, because so many overweight people (especially women) get miss-diagnosed or get denied treatment because of their weight. But the movement got high-jacked by extreme, morbidly fascinating characters who are, either, clearly delusional, into the "feederism" kink or other bizarre things... Because they make more noise than ordinary plus-size people. It's no wonder that fashion is going back to the "heroin-chic" look: The real Body-Positivity movement of the early 2000's is dead.

[@itsmxria]

i feel like the current "body positivity" community is just a bunch of grown people competing to see who suffers more about being in a larger body while Vanessa doesn't feel sorry for herself all the time, YOU CAN TELL, she actually accepts and love herself no matter what size she is at the moment. And that is truly inspiring for all of us.

[@JustToSaveYou]

I was a hardcore body-positive/fat acceptance person a couple years ago. I was also in the worst place with my depression that I'd ever been. I hated myself and I leaned on the retoric so I could ignore my weight. It wasn't until I went under TMS (Transcranial Magnetic Stimulation) and got onto a successful anti-depressant combination that I started to actually care if I lived. Which was the moment I realized the body-positivity/fat-acceptance movement (while it had some valuable and important ideas) had a rotten core that was slowly infecting it entirely.

[@Moopiemilk]

I really relate to this. I’m still depressed but I realized that it’s easier to convince yourself that the cheeseburger isn’t that big of a deal, than it is to get up and be active and lose weight. My depression tells me that I don’t matter enough to do those things for my health, even that I don’t deserve it. I’m getting better as of recent but getting motivated and out of bed is as hard as working out and going on the treadmill. I just can’t help but see myself in the rhetoric fat activists spout because it’s obvious they’re just insecure

[@JustToSaveYou]

@@MoopiemilkI'm still pretty early in the getting better stage too. The thing that really helped me was learning to do things even if I can't finish them. Folding half a load of laundry is better than not moving at all. Best wishes.

[@WobblesandBean]

Thanks. It's pretty evident to see that the vast majority of fat acceptance are obese women who hate themselves and just project that hatred onto thin women, but it's nice to hear someone actually say it.

[@JustToSaveYou]

@@WobblesandBean I never reached the point where I was hating on skinny people, but it definitely didn't ring the warning bells it should have when I heard people doing it. Later it was actually one of the big reasons I realized all was not well there.

[@britanyponder4412]

I need to know how you went about getting TMS and did you have any severe side effects? I really want to try it. It's my last option, it seems, for me to kick depression in the ass. Antidepressants don't work for me.

[@Ryan_DeWitt]

Even younger people who show OK bloodwork while being obese it is only temporary. When they check them years later down the road, it almost always has deteriorated to what we see in most obese people.

[@spiderlily723]

In most cases it's the same as 'I don't beed supplement! B12' vegans: they have good bloodwork until the storage from the time they weren't vegans runs out and they're sudenly sick.

[@Pugetwitch]

Deteriorated* detonated means that something has exploded!🤣🤣🤣

[@a697ag]

It's amazing how much shit your body lets you get away with until one day it just goes 'nope' and starts falling apart

[@gypsydanger1013]

These are people who smoke 3 packs a day but don't have cancer yet. People who drink a gallon of vodka a week but don't have liver failure yet. It's pathetic and disappointing, and anyone like Tess Holliday claims to be anorexic, maybe she should try cutting back from 25,000 calories per day to 20,000. Disgusting pig.

[@arbitrary_raspberry]

I cant imagine their doctors say that their bloodwork is good and that's it. They should say that to keep it good they should work on their health and try to eat healthier etc

[@RustyShackleford051]

0:05 definitely heard it as "we are afraid of batman" and I didn't even question it because it's these people

[@kirika119]

I absolutely admire how Vanessa can love herself but still take full responsibility for her actions and accept that from a health standpoint she needs to better herself

[@Xenosthewatcher]

It's kind of impossible not to Like Vannessa, she has such a infectious positive vibe, but she's also down to Earth and understands she has to change. Also, can we give her friend Megan a giant hug and high five for being such a positive influence on Vannessa? We all could use a friend like Megan.

[@mikeythemutt8460]

My dad was diagnosed with bladder cancer this year, the doctors told him that obesity was a major factor. Thankfully they caught it early and he's doing better, hopefully that's his wake up call to get healthier.

[@anyamiranda9452]

:'( I'm so sorry, hope he gets cured

[@mikeythemutt8460]

@@anyamiranda9452 Thank you. He just finished chemo two weeks ago, he's in great spirits.

[@CanopusLux]

All the best to you and your family 👪 I had cancer several times already, lost 60lbs and I feel so much better

[@scruffylookingnerfherder1983]

Prayers for him

[@ZacksRockingLifestyle]

The research showing that cancer is primarily a metabolic disease instead of a genetic disease is very promising. Hopefully his doctors combined a low-carbohydrate nutrition plan with the chemo to maximize his results

[@leliablackwell5141]

I feel Vanessa’s pain over her failure to her son. My son got up to 365 and it was scary. He’s down to 220 and looks great and his confidence is great. His weight wasn’t genetic it was our bad eating habits. It’s been a journey but we’re good now and it’s awesome. I really wish her the best of luck. She seems sweet.

[@fendybendy6466]

good on your son for losing that weight :)

[@Angelkisses444]

You are a good parent.

[@wikiwoof9590]

We can’t change the past but facing up to our mistakes and overcoming them is admirable. Good for you all.

[@jasonanno3881]

Word. Well said

[@WhisperedShadow123]

The fact that her grandfather died at 51 and her mother at 51 might mean ancestral pain was passed down to her. It's interesting to think that obesity can also be a generational thing and that by striving to be healthy and lose weight, one is actively healing family trauma even though it is extremely painful and challenging.

[@crazyhorse5163]

"ancestral pain???" What the hell are you talking about.

[@PTRAINBOY]

​@@crazyhorse5163look it up .. Did you finish high school

[@GrainMuncher]

@@crazyhorse5163The great ancient curse of hamburger addiction

[@crazyhorse5163]

@@GrainMuncher 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣😏

[@debochando]

😂😂😂😂 wtf

[@NoelTeel]

I was 15 and 275lb (at 5’2”), funny enough, my turning point was watching the Simpson’s and them showing Homer at 265 and being the fattest person in town… it caused me to have a mental breakdown and I proceeded to loose 100lbs over the next year. I had been obese since birth basically and no matter what the doctors told my mom it was never my diets fault in her eyes and she would get offended if they told her i needed help as a young child. I unfortunately get tripped up by an autoimmune disease and neurological problems and i gained 50lbs back at 18, but i am on my path again and am 10lbs down on my health journey take #2 ❤✌️(now that i know how to cope with my chronic illnesses properly) Fat activism triggers me so much knowing first hand how many health problems come from being overweight, having high blood pressure and fatty liver disease at 13 YEARS OLD is so normal and should be celebrated, being obese is great and for sure won’t kill you 🙄😒

[@ji0419]

Hi Kiana. I’m 17 years old and am severely obese (300lbs). Many years I put off gaining weight because I told myself I have many years to solve my problems. I have stopped believing the delusion that there is nothing wrong with my weight, when normal things are extremely difficult. With the fat acceptance movement blowing up, it makes me slightly sad seeing other people like me saying we are perfectly healthy when we know we aren’t. I wanted to also add that I’m beginning my weight loss journey and hopefully I graduate healthy and happy. Growing up I was constantly consuming large sodas and McDonalds, so in my head I excused that being this morbidly obese is not my fault. But no one else can fix it expect me. I wish to be a normal girl so I’m beginning to take action. I want to thank you and your videos. The path ahead was always intimidating to me, but it must be done. Thank you kiana, you really did change my perspective of literally everything. In a good way!

[@WileyCylas]

Good luck on your journey! U can do it! Don’t be afraid to add an assisting medical team to your army if ur able to access it!

[@ji0419]

@@WileyCylas honestly thank you so much. You have no idea how much your encouragement means! We can not afford medical assistance but I’m figuring it out! Thanks again!!💜

[@charlynefrancis737]

You can do it. Don't give up with your weight loss journey, rooting you from afar.

[@ji0419]

@@charlynefrancis737 i really appreciate the support💜

[@ZephyrusBlue]

Keep it up! Remember that you simply gotta find healthy foods THAT YOU ENJOY. “Diets” simply don’t work long-term. You also don’t have to tell yourself “no” on sodas if you enjoy them, but opt for the zero sugar variants as they will help out MASSIVELY when it comes to consuming them over a standard soda. That being said, definitely drink plenty of water(And a fun way to incentivize yourself to drink water when going out to eat is to imagine putting that money that would’ve gone towards the drink to the tip that you’ll provide instead. Makes it easier to tip AND it’s easier drink that water knowing it’s saving a few bucks in the long run lol)

[@Geminicuriosity]

6:42 "I failed you as a mother. I did." I don't watch the show but that type of accountability hits so different. It takes a strong person to face up to the damage they (unwittingly) did to theselves and others, without excuse. I really hope Vannessa can take advantage of all the help, get healthier, and live a long and happy life. (:

[@crystalwu7400]

shes the first person i saw in the show that actually takes accountability for someone else. She couldve said “my son is grown so its not my problem”, but instead she puts her sons entire responsibilities on herself.

[@4everhealthwellness344]

She is an awesome example of what true self respect, self love and REAL body positivity

[@Hellscap3]

I recently hit just overweight instead of obsese on my bmi :3 i think a large turning point was finding your channel for me so i reccomend your vids to everyone. The way you talk about these topics i feel are very approachable for someone who is deluding themselves to the dangers and issues but still wants to lose weight deep down inside. Through just diet/lifestyle changes i lost half my target weight already 50/100 lbs the last 50 will likely take alot more work as now that im under 175lbs i assume I'll need to at least work out to get some off more then just my normal daily exercise of my homes stairs lol I'm happy to say tho unlike my 225lbs self they no longer tire me out in the slightest even if i run up the stairs :3

[@Neophema]

Aim to gain some muscle mass, as it will increase your resting metabolism. :) Good luck!

[@candyzombiee]

great job!! i just got out of the obese bmi range myself a few weeks ago! 182lbs and hopefully losing this week even though i’ve been too sick to work out lol. congrats on your weight loss!

[@TheFlargleblargle]

Nice job Hellscap, you deserve all your success

[@gizv.6032]

Lift weights! Don't starve and have a balance with food!

[@innerGindigo]

"i failed you as a mother" boy that gave me goosebump! What a beautiful woman, that realness is so rare

[@spacexghost888]

I love Vanessa. She’s real and authentic.

[@Deadpool396]

I’ve always loved how you’ve gone about videos like these. You never come off as disrespectful or condescending. Just honest and straightforward.

[@welshdragon99]

Even when she was saying "it's my lifestyle" and refusing help she still had a more realistic and self-responsible mindset than body positive activists. She wasn't under any delusion that she wasn't hurting herself in the long term, she just didn't care at that point. Reversing a delusion is far harder than getting someone to care about what they know.

[@bigbay1159]

Excellent catch, she was stuck in her ways but she knew it was her actions being the problem. Different realm all together from where the fat acceptance morons are.

[@TurdFurgeson571]

Originally, fat "acceptance" came from a good place that I generally agree with: more harm reductive than capitulation. We understood that failure to accept, love, and care for oneself impedes progress for most people. So "acceptance" was more like, "I can't lose all this weight today, but I don't have to make unproductive choices because of that. I'm fat today, and I don't have to hate myself. I'll be fat tomorrow, and I won't have to hate myself. But over time, I can gradually lose weight and improve my objective health markers. And I don't have to hate myself to deserve improvement."

[@AW-uv3cb]

You put it so well!

[@bazhumke4040]

fr this is easily the best i've ever seen this idea phrased

[@TurdFurgeson571]

@@AW-uv3cb Thank you for saying that.

[@TurdFurgeson571]

@@bazhumke4040 Thanks for the feedback. I'm glad it resonated with you.

[@robokill387]

Plus, it was originally for people with disabilities who genuinely couldn't control how the looked, and also was originally about being treated as a human being with human respect and dignity, not demanding that people are attracted to you and see you as beautiful like today.

[@ingridgallagher1029]

She has this childlike joy about things that's inspiring and contagious.

[@PanicGiraffe]

"Can't even have a heart attack in peace when you're fat" Right, because it's a great time when you're fit

[@user-mv5zt8qd9l]

"Having it pointed out that I put myself in the face-eating leopard pen while being treated for my eaten face is oppression, somehow."

[@XamindundoneX]

Also bc having a heartattack is so peaceful 😒

[@Jalanko13]

Being fit means you can be transported to Hospital in time to save your life. Being fat means you’re stuck in the room where you had your heart attack, left to die.

[@PanicGiraffe]

@@Jalanko13 sounds like as good reason to not be fat

[@sofiapinot7422]

OMG so right, you don't see as much fitness influencers having hart attacks as the body positivity ones

[@TheRosyMapleMothMan]

I came across your channel when I was trying to find actual body positive videos. I have diagnosed binge eating disorder and I managed to get it under control (for the most part) and have lost 70lbs. My larger (ex)friends began harassing and bullying me over my weight loss. They began calling me fat-phobic and accusing me of being unhealthy during my weight loss. It hurt so much and I almost quit my weight loss journey, but my health is way more important than their opinions. There’s no body positive movement, only hate for people who have the motivation and determination to put their health first.

[@alamedadanceparty]

Congratulations!! Losing toxic people was also a big weight off your shoulders too. 💪💪💪

[@moonstruck8245]

Sounds like you lost a lot more than 70lbs of dead weight. People who want you to be unhealthy so they don't have to face the idea that yes, it is a thing that is possible to do, are people who you don't need in your life.

[@sillubean5124]

Good luck on your weight loss and hope you have supportive friendships in the future. Actually there are two very different body positive movements the leftist one believes in weight loss as a health measure but not a marketing tool. The nuance of fighting the discrimination that isolates vulnerable people that need community to reach health and have a healthy relationship with food. The fat acceptance body positivity movement is a harmful imposter that overshines the leftist movement.

[@megsley]

DDP Yoga community is an incredible real body positivity community - folks who are supporting others in getting fit and losing weight!

[@jamiezuzu7326]

They are jealous. Sincerely

[@vanessavarela01]

That’s honestly impressive how confidently she wears that bikini on the beach. I’m 110 pounds and much closer to the “ideal” body type and I don’t even like wearing bathing suits in public. I really wish I had her confidence. It’s really quite admirable and I don’t mean that sarcastically.

[@kiiltochii1607]

Yes, honestly speaking it is admirable. It's also good she's still going out in general and being active (and not just sitting on the couch and complaining about everything like Tammy)

[@thing2521]

Hey. Just go. No one cares 😅

[@vanessavarela01]

@@thing2521 if you don’t care why do you bother responding lmao

[@mac-ju5ot]

U just said the gods honest truth. Ive struggled for years abd even had the sleeve many years ago I got anorexic over social situation was body shamed by a man I dated first ...my body us that not anyone else. My sister told me to give it up..I drive her I vomit before go outside .I'm sick of the pressure we put in each other ....just be who we are like the sneeches on the beaches

[@blueberrysmoke447]

Same. Inspiring

[@agabrielhegartygaby9203]

I am a psychiatrist (MD) and let me tell everyone: people like Vanessa I've met professionally are/have been usually from the various 12 step movements especially AA, OA, GA and DA... These people came to me as patients and have educated me (better than a textbook). What I have learned is that after "bottoming out" there seems to be no reality too hard to face for them - talk about courage! I respect, admire and am PERSONALLY inspired by people I have had the privilege to meet, like Vanessa.

[@ashlimaribcu]

She's dropped a lot of weight currently. I love her spirit.

[@bevq2246]

I appreciate how self-aware Vannessa is

[@gabrielagonzalez4053]

expect when she gets slightly upset. If you seen the show she gets really upset at anything and takes it out on her friends.

[@portalomus]

Why do people think it's okay to abuse or heckle larger people, just because they're overweight? Just let them live their lives! Some of them are trying really hard just like Vannessa and have so much to deal with. Thank you for the positive video.

[@dacievandyke5930]

I totally agree with that. We also have to acknowledge this isn't healthy for anyone. There is also self control and responsibility. Take responsibility for your life.

[@alexforce9]

I dont even think its based on some evil intent , its probably more of invasive though that we think its ok to share. Like - I have been skinny all my life coz of health problems. The amount of people who commented on my weight is...substantial. But I doubt its more than some very tall mofo who get "You really are tall " every day. Or even some good looking girl who hears about hers looks so much that she starts craving someone to mention her personality. Or the girl with the big boobs who get attention to them form both men and women daily. In the end, I think its just the human nature to notice stuff like this and comment on them.

[@user-rg7vr1kd1w]

@@dacievandyke5930 100%, bullying larger people won't make them any smaller and it's plain rude and useless.

[@fredithegeroo906]

Exactly! Many people, even those staunchly against the fat acceptance movement, always, always, ALWAYS say that shaming will not help ANYTHING.

[@yoyoyoyo-lq4jb]

Even people that aren't doing anything about their weight deserve to be treated kindly. You can't tell based on how someone looks the steps they are or aren't taking towards better health! (Not disagreeing, just adding some stuff)

[@Ahmalik_Yaaz]

Vanessa embodies actual body positivity. She loves her body despite the weight not because of it

[@asdasdae]

I gotta say as somebody who's ~30 lbs overweight and who's suffered with binge eating disorder (obviously nowhere near to the degree as the people you showcase on this channel but regardless) it's really inspiring to hear somebody with sense actually talk about these things. We all appreciate your channel so much

[@OwlScowling]

Just wanted to encourage you and say you can do it! I started my journey at 188 lbs which is really overweight for my height. A year and a half later I look like a completely different person. I lost maybe 20-30 lbs of fat and put on a ton of muscle, too. I went from being the out of shape friend to the bodybuilder friend in what feels like no time. Obviously you don't need to go the bodybuilding route (that just helped me to stay motivated), but I just wanted to encourage you that you can absolutely do it.

[@tristantries9211]

@@OwlScowling how did you start feeling full with like a normal portion?

[@OwlScowling]

@@tristantries9211 Honestly, if you start eating more nutritious foods, by volume it's kind of insane how much food you can eat and still lose weight. Meal Prep Manual has a lot of great recipes for that sort of stuff that helped me. Otherwise it's just about making small changes over time. For me once I started weightlifting that helped most of it for me, since I started to care more about what I ate since I wanted to keep getting stronger/more muscular, etc. When I was just dieting to not be fat it was so discouraging to just feel like I wasn't having what I wanted just because. I hope this helps!

[@matilda232]

Wow you're like meee:') good luck bro

[@Emma-wb7ig]

I’m about 12, 5”2 1/2, and 150~ (?) I struggle with binging and purging. I feel yuh. I’ve lost weight, which is good ig. I must concede, It’s a struggle.

[@fulliewolfie]

True body positivity is not about justifying your problems with your body. It's about loving your body, which means taking genuine care of it, and care isn't about enabling, but it is about acceptance, support and help.

[@IndigoSoulMama]

I used to be 265 lbs due to depression and a bad marriage. I remember the exact moment I knew I couldn't live the way I was anymore. So proud of those who overcome these struggles.

[@scam276]

I can't get over the "being a little more helps stabilizing joints" dude. Skinny people falling apart left and right lmao

[@adrianghandtchi1562]

They are very strange to think that. I thought lightness on joints was great for reducing strain

[@sirebellum0]

With a completely straight face too. Like "let me school you, entire medical community"

[@thatfuzzypotato1877]

Its worse in context: they were referring to living with EDS. Literally all literature says being even a little overweight with EDS is extremely bad and raises the risk of injuries significantly

[@WileyCylas]

@@thatfuzzypotato1877 u mean Ehlers Danlos syndrome? Doggone it I have that! The hypermobility variant! Yeah my wonky joints can’t even tolerate me being a FEW lbs overweight! Just the lower healthy bmi is best on em.

[@thatfuzzypotato1877]

@@WileyCylas "I literally have SO many friends with EDS and...." is their source. But yes they were talking about Ehlos Danlers Syndrome claiming fatter=better for the syndrome when... no??

[@jenhasken]

At first Vanessa was in denial but she did wake up and kudos to her. That takes courage.

[@christinakinch]

Vanessa is honestly a role model. Her opening up about and acknowledging so many things in that show is so brave and "positive". Vanessa chose to not be a victim of her own circumstances, but rather a fighter.

[@KishorTwist]

I was extremely surprised when mentioning her age. I truly thought "that's a lady in her 60s"!!

[@drpepper-is-a-woman206]

I used to be 300+lbs and now I'm 175. I see so much of my former self in these "activists" because I used to cope by saying the same things to myself. But losing the weight made me realize that I was dealing with so much unnecessary pain and tormenting myself with my insecurities. I changed my lifestyle and I worked on my relationship with food for years. It took me years to get to that point. The journey is hard but worth it and a testament to my self love. I loved myself enough to get the help I needed and deserved. I hope Vanessa conquers her obstacles, she seems like such a lovely woman.

[@Zucca101]

As a man who is overweight and working to change myself so I can trim down again, seeing stories like hers help inspire me to stay the course. Because the “Body Positivity” movement and the “Fat Activists” couldn’t give less of a toss about obese men. In a way, I’m grateful for that fact, as they’d have tried to draw me into that world of delusion.

[@VimmiiPOV]

I can say as someone who at my highest weighed 135kg, I will say. It sucks, movement sucks, being social sucks, thinking about anything except what you could be hurts. I got so fed up with being heavy and decided to change my habits. I dropped to 120 at first, then started dancing. And then continued for a year doing literally to the point of opposite unhealthy I am talking losing 0.5-2kg per week. Until I hit 94kg, thats when I hit a very sudden issue of just I am naturally quite strong and I had replaced so much fat with muscle and I had at my lowest (tested) 12% body fat (I am supposed to be at 18-20%. I am today at a moderately healthy 98-106kg, mostly just focused on being mobile and being lively. I also have to to keep my mind above water as I do have a lot of psychological issues. So I can with that being said say, I hate how they want to make being unhealthy the normal. Just no. no. NO.

[@SieMiezekatze]

Let's go!!! Congrats on your progress

[@mayurgianchandani8803]

Congrats !! I went through something similar, weighed in at 110kgs, never had a lot of mobility issues thankfully, but it was more about being done being insecure about my weight. Dropped to like 90 something in the first few months, hit a plateau there, and then got bloody strict and dropped to something like 68 to 70 kgs recently. I’m not as strong as I was at my highest weight, but I started incorporating strength training to get better at that. It’s such an amazing feeling, and so many little things bring me joy, like being able to lift and fit my feet on a chair, it’s weird but I couldn’t even imagine doing that before, atleast not without pulling a muscle. It’s weird to see all of this outright demonised.

[@spaceace9103]

Proud of you internet stranger

[@madabouthollyoaks411]

Thinking about anything except what you could be - I spend like 90% of my waking thoughts on this. It’s so painful

[@anyaroz8619]

Matilde, wow! Thank you for sharing your story. It's amazing! I admire your decision to change (not your body, but your attitude and your mind about life and opportunities). I wrote a super-long comment on here and I wonder if you agree with what I wrote. To me, it's the mindset, the psychological issues of people who think that everyone is better then them, which is not true. In fact it's the other way around. I feel like people who overeat are the people who take on too much on themselves, are way too self-critical and self-bashing. I think that your goal of keeping your mind above water is brilliant. I don't believe in perfection. I don't believe in ideals of beauty (these are total crap - I mean is green more beautiful then pink?). But I believe in "good" and "enough" and in "good enough".

[@maylhinem1077]

The confidence she has when she's at the beach in a bikini, I have to admit it's impressive. I lost weight (60 lbs) and I have a totally healthy weight now, but I have some irreversible damages on my body (which seems totally negligible compared to hers) but I would never NEVER dare to wear a bikini and go to the beach... So yeah, truly impressive!

[@CuteAnimalVideos2580]

Even when I was underweight I only wore a bikini once in my life. I hate showing people my belly

[@maylhinem1077]

@@CuteAnimalVideos2580 Same. Even when I had a normal body I might have worn one 3 or 4 times. I always felt super uncomfortable. I haven't worn one in 15 years and my belly will never see the light of day again for sure.

[@starsantheoriginal]

I remember REALLY disliking Vanessa when I first saw her I am so HAPPY to see her transformation!! It is actually really refreshing and exciting to see someone that seems a lot like me 💜💙 I will pray for her continued success! Great Video Kiana, this one really gave some happy vibes!

[@WilliamtheWorst]

True body positivity is wanting your body to be the best it can possibly be.

[@alaska4939]

I started dating a guy recently. I'm about 70lbs overweight and 20lbs closer to my weight loss goal. I honestly never thought a nice, very handsome, sweet guy would fall for me. He loves me for me. And he encourages me to be healthy. The day I hit 20lbs down, he was the first one I texted. I still don't really believe it when he calls me beautiful. But every time he does it, I feel so much better about myself and I want to continue to get healthier.

[@cautiousgalaxy4613]

It makes me so angry they say it isnt sustainable, thats the most damaging thing you can tell people. My brother lost weight around 10 years. It fluctuates here and there but that's mainly the holidays that do it. I've been losing weight and keeping it off. I might have a stand still but I haven't gone back up.

[@Eibarwoman]

I've sustained 40-50 pounds of the weight loss from my peak weight and never gained it back from a decade ago. That being said, I've been as much as 40 pounds lighter in more recent years but didn't like what I saw in the mirror on the upper half as too much rib bone.

[@jaqiharrison1984]

This whole "it's a waste of time losing weight because you'll just gain it back" is like saying there's no point in cutting your toe nails because they'll just grow back. Then bitching because socks aren't made strong enough for people with long toenails.

[@carochan86]

Congrats on the weight stability.

[@WobblesandBean]

I lost 40 pounds, gained back 20. I'm dreading Thanksgiving. 😞

[@SmallSpoonBrigade]

It's not usually sustainable because diets require too much work to be maintained indefinitely. Very few people can manage it for more than a few months. If you want longer term, then you have to talk about changing your relationship with food and the related habits. Without that, it's not going to be long term. Plus, the body evolved to go through the year gaining and losing a bit of weight. As long as you're not getting too far from ideal in either direction, the body is just fine. Ideally, the body would be a bit on the heavy side in the fall and it's lightest in the early spring.

[@ChogTheGreat]

Over the space of about 3 yrs, I lost close to 50lb and intend on losing another 10lb or so. While progressively losing weight, I got into running (I've NEVER been into running), I hiked many miles at a time and saw amazing things such as slot canyons and mountain peaks... If you want to, you can honestly do this, you just need to deal with the underlying stress and shame, and have a solid purpose in mind. For me, it was about reducing stress, developing new coping mechanisms, and developing the purpose of living life 'to the fullest' by having amazing experiences that only physical conditioning can bring. There are many mountain peaks I would have missed if I didn't go on this journey. It's tough, but damn rewarding! There have been ups and downs, but if you are trying, keep trying, and never stop trying. The best and most rewarding type of "self love" is literally "self care." The journey is hard, but YOU CAN DO THIS.

[@meaganscarlette1279]

Love this! Congrats on putting in the work!

[@InedibleMuffin]

As someone who's overweight, I find it extremely empowering to believe that I can love my body at any weight. That I deserve to be healthy and live a longer life, which is why I should lose weight. The concept of self improvement, even if it's difficult, is incredibly uplifting. I don't understand how there was a need for it to be misconstrued into "health at every weight" by some circles, the movement really puzzles me. It's like a "feel-good" message without any of the effort.

[@nejuan6339]

A lack of accountability seemd to be a trend and it's disheartening. I fell in love with Vanessa and her whole attitude. She's beautiful, real and so in touch with herself. She's so inspirational. Great video.

[@kennie1814]

I honestly admire people who lose weight so much. I struggled with a drug addiction from 14-16, and I simply cannot imagine quitting something you’re addicted to while you literally need it to live. It’s like saying “stop being addicted to heroin but continue shooting up once a day” it’s insanity to me. Mad props to y’all!

[@angel-ry9mb]

being a formerly obese disordered eater and now pursuing a healthier lifestyle everyday, these videos tickle my brain so well. i've watched every video you've put out, keep up the good work.

[@WileyCylas]

Way to go! Rock on!

[@radiationpatient]

I love your videos on fatphobia and fat activism because it comes from such an informed and objective yet sympathetic position as you have been overweight/obese yourself, it's so much better than fit youtubers making videos that come off so rude and ignorant towards obesity or fat youtubers making videos disregarding health studies and the pain of being obese in the name of "body positivity". The combination of your knowledge on physical science and your knowledge on societal issues that factor into the obesity epidemic really makes these videos special; keep it up :)

[@haleyshaw8377]

Kiana, I'm so distracted by how incredible your hair looks. I noticed how great it looked in the last video as well. Just had to let you know, keep doing what you're doing, you look so glamorous!

[@venomg5799]

She's got good hair genes

[@lGhalis]

I noticed too! she is the result of embracing body positivity and it reflects completely! (healthwise)

[@venomg5799]

@@lGhalis umm, what? Not the bOdY pOsItIvItY the *OBESE* acceptance morons spread.

[@lGhalis]

@@venomg5799 did u watch the video? lol

[@ZephyrusBlue]

At least someone else said it 😂. The color coordination and everything was just 🤌🏻. (I’m definitely a sucker for blue though) but regardless, yeah she’s killin it!

[@mrastronaut9078]

Nobody mentions ho funny Vanessa is. Like, in so many clips, she makes a joke that actually makes me laugh at how likable she is. Like, actually laugh irl. Idk why, but that makes me so much more happy to see her succeed.

[@slxxpyhollow]

Vannessa legitimately makes my eyes tear up from how sweet she is and how happy and proud I feel for her!

[@miunya]

The one thing i regret is being obese as a teenager. I've lost a lot of weight but now I've got stretch marks, lose skin and a pot belly, saggy boobs etc it sucks... I wish my mom knew about nutrition... how blind I was about food and how I was abusing it. I am still overweight but only by just under 30lb and I'm trying to lose it. Going gym more etc. Diet is still a struggle as I'm only 5 foot 2 and not sure if I'm eating too much even when I'm tracking

[@maylhinem1077]

I can relate to that so much; It sucks to have managed to lose all the extra weight and be stuck with the irreversible damage that my unhealthy lifestyle and obesity has done to my body for life...

[@misskay6831]

I had that issue as well. I've been lifting weights for 6 months now. The belly is almost gone along with the loose skin, boobs have lifted alot but not perky. Also look into pelvic tilt, that may be the problem with your pot belly.

[@savannaobregon3823]

At 5'3 I have found that the best calorie amount while exercising 3 times a week is about 1300-1500 per day to slowly lose weight without constantly feeling hungry

[@feonixrizen4960]

That part where she's just sitting on the ground crying because everything hurts and is difficult hit me so hard. I've been there, not because of obesity but because of my own disability. There's not much I can do to change my situation but I hope and pray that she is able to change hers for the better. She seems like a very practical woman and deserves to be happy and pain free. And to that fat activist that said being fat stabilizes your joints, I hope we don't meet. I've never been obese but I've been damn close to overweight and even just that hurt my joints. I've lost some weight and while, yes, I am still in pain I cannot imagine how much more pain I'd be in if I were obese. That's the kind of person that I would make them look me in the eye to say that to me before I slap them in the damn face.

[@sparkles154]

What you said is right. Also I have the same condition as the guy who said being fat stabilises our joints... It doesn't. He's likely gonna need large joint replacements in his 40s. Genuinely annoys me

[@thegriffinnews]

​@@sparkles154 I had a health scare last summer and dropped nearly 25 pounds I didn't have to lose. As I've been working on putting it back on I will say that as my boney bits get some padding I can see why people would say "fat=padding=good for joints". But it really depends on what your percentage of body fat is to start with.

[@ActuallyAShrimp]

I literally started crying at the end I'm so proud of this goddamn woman

[@chophouse404]

Vanessa truly is an inspiration. I wish more of the body-positivity members could see her story and realize that you can accept yourself AND better yourself. I hope she is still doing great and living her best life. Thank you for shedding some light on her.

[@idkwhattoputherechat]

i like body positivity when it’s teaching women and young girls that you don’t have to be borderline underweight to be pretty but not when it’s making ppl hurt themselves

[@KitCat898]

As always this video was so well done! I think the worst parts of the fat acceptance movements are that those who are “pro-fat acceptance,” have made the movement about self worth instead of about the extremely addictive, unhealthy food industry that pushes products they know will cause problems in order to make money. Plus, as you stated, there’s a behavior issue that’s not being addressed. Each individual is responsible fort their diets and acknowledging a lack of discipline or displacement of emotions that’s using food as a coping mechanism.

[@autisticrabi5296]

It's always a better day when Kiana uploads

[@LuthienAlexandra]

I was 212 pounds in August, now I'm down to 180 and still going. 10 years ago I was 125 pounds. I have not went to the beach since before I gained weight (for obvious reasons), but even when I was skinny I was never confident wearing a bikini. I never had actual fun at the beach because I was constantly self conscious and tense. That's why I admire Vanessa so much. She is the incarnation of confidence and body positivity.

[@veteranredbeard6222]

Being overweight contributes to depression, body pain, makes it harder to get pregnant, and affects EVERYTHING. I was 335 lbs and was miserable every minute. When I lost 100lbs, my life changed and I'm now so happy.

[@noah1502]

this is a very important thing youre talking about. the internet in general is really bad at heightening delusions and keeping people from owning up to their own reality. learned helplessness, social contagions of depression, self-harm, etc. im glad you are talking about this, its very important from so many different angles.

[@noah1502]

also props to vanessa for being so brave and being able to own up to so much and take on such a challenge!

[@hope-cat4894]

That's definitely true. There are people out there who'll blame the world for their own actions and choices when they meet people who do the same thing, they build a community that will bully anyone who criticizes them into submission. It's frustrating to watch.

[@tunaricebanana]

Strongly agree with you on being concerned for the people who join these movements and what will happen to them in 20+ years. Can’t imagine the regret some of them will feel. Regret is bad enough when it’s not health related.

[@catrinacrystallina]

I hate that it isn’t limited to their movement. Their rhetoric will at best diminish people’s quality of life and at worst lead them to an early grave. It’s such a dangerous message to push.

[@krisl6537]

I'm rooting for Vanessa. Her story has brought me to tears. I really hope she reaches her goal and stays healthy.

[@JasonLeeIsAGod]

Vanessa's attitude about her body & weight loss are life goals! I know seeing her working out on that stationary bike a few episodes ago & saying she loved it made me get back on my stationary bike & do some extra time for my own good.

[@wikiwoof9590]

Thank you Kiana. I use your videos to help me get my head right because I gained 40 lbs during Covid. My joints are messed up and I feel gross even though I don’t look that bad yet. Looks don’t matter though, I just miss being strong and not in pain. Edit to add: the reason body positivity isn’t like Vanessa is because that require swallowing hard truths, putting in effort and being vulnerable.

[@pinkypie8322]

Vanessa has my deepest Respect, she is raw, she is brutally honest, she is human and shows it 100%, at the same time she is a warm and understanding person who motivates her friends, i Love her

[@MK-hh1vo]

Thanks for sharing this message. My heart breaks for her 400lb son! So glad she's sharing the downside of the "It's ok to be obese" movement. Wish you had a full body pic of Vanessa at the end. Love you!

[@ruby8863]

This is the kinda nuanced take i wanna see more often in body positivity. I’m always going to believe that you can be happy, beautiful, confident, etc, at every size but you can’t be healthy. It doesn’t mean you have to hate yourself, it just means you have to find motivation to improve your self.

[@JessicaMargaretDean]

Vanessa is the embodiment of learning to become the Hero of her own life. And so are you Kiana. Thank you for your reasoned voice in this sphere. Great video!! 👏

[@kaoyuehhui]

I gained at least 10kg in US. I went back to Taiwan and everyone reminded me that i became so big. I personally felt hurt but I knew that I should better improve my diet. I know that talking about weight is a taboo in US but I sometimes miss it. This kind of stressful conversation help people like me who sometimes eat whatever and totally forget the obligation of talking care of oneself.

[@dc100dc100]

“I’m fat and healthy” is like “ I smoke and don’t have cancer”.. yet.

[@alexandrahill9176]

It has taken me years to realize I can appreciate how much my body has done for me and love how it is now while taking action to get healthier so I can continue to be thankful for everything my body will do for me the better I take care of myself. The body positive community has put the wool over my eyes for years and really messed me up mentally and emotionally for a long time. Seeing people like Vannessa on her journey makes me so happy!

[@katerynaivashchenko783]

You are always so thoughtful and empathetic when talking about people🥺 It's what makes your videos very comfortable to watch, even when you cover difficult topics. Thank you for educating people on these topics, which can be very difficult to do because of how controversial some people make them out to be. I first came across one of your videos because I wanted a quick recap of what happened with 1000 pound sisters, but I stayed for very insightful analysis of how we interact with food and I learned a lot about the psychology behind it all. Thank you so much for your work!💖

[@grant6578]

I watch this show every week, its so good, Vanessa is such a role model now for her son, and friends. Shes showing everyone that its possible to take control of your life. She's showing everyone how hard it is, but how its possible with the right attitude. With the right support, and that it isn't a magic pill. You can literally see how much happier she is now. Sure, she loved herself too while overweight, but it just hits different.. when you love yourself differently.

[@xdani_thethinkingneko]

12:45 The way she talks about it, reminds me how I used to talk about heroin when I was still actively an IV drug user. I'm glad she's finally accepted her addiction, and realize how much it's hurting her. That is the first step to getting better. I wish the fat acceptance movement, understood that is certain point it is literally addiction. It is no different, than me shooting drugs into my veins. 😢 Edit: I am clean now tho! Just hit 5yrs ❤