Feeling lonely at university? 😔 Watch this

Рет қаралды 11,578

Christina Aaliyah

Күн бұрын

Пікірлер

@Amandasbarros Жыл бұрын

The thing about feeling great alone but so lonely in uni is so real. I just don't feel like myself around them

@ChristinaAaliyah Жыл бұрын

i feel you 🥺

@cookiekrum Ай бұрын

thank you so much for this video cuz i’ve genuinely never been feeling so lonely and it gets to the point where I feel embarrassed to even talk to old friends because I feel like i’m coming off as desperate for any social interactions. This is also surprising considering that I was a highschool senior just a year ago and I was super socialable and outgoing and while having a tight knit friend group and this transition to being less social has really taken a toll on my mental health.

@Aomame_love 8 ай бұрын

I’m in the same situation right now. I don’t have any close relationship in uni and it’s so hard to be alone all the time

@ailblentyn 8 ай бұрын

What county are you in? Are you living with other students, as in most of the U.K. and U.S.?

@h.nawarathna509 5 ай бұрын

Same here

@PhdCooper16 2 ай бұрын

Same here

@AmanKaur0987 2 ай бұрын

Same

@MeredithFlood Ай бұрын

Same!

@elliottmarcel1506 Жыл бұрын

Hey just wanted to say watching this video made me feel so validated as to how I feel , It’s so easy to think I’m the only one in my town who feels this way , this video honestly felt like a therapy session , I agree with how us being naturally quiet prevents us from showing our inner , vibrant personalities that we have , but are afraid to show due to fear . Honestly for me the loneliness has really affected my grades , I feel so much less motivated to study and work hard when I have no social interaction , it feels so empty , and when I visit home on the weekends and meet up with family and friends from high school I feel so much better , almost overjoyed , like damn this is what’s it’s like to have friends . Also being around so many vibrant friend groups when your alone is kind of heartbreaking , also a bit jealousy invoking . I be jealous of all those friend groups on campus . I wish universities put more of an effort in creating support systems and organizations / meetups specifically for people who tend to struggle socially (due to shyness , fear of new people ) , because it’s kind of really common , and it really puts people in a dark place 😢

@ChristinaAaliyah Жыл бұрын

You literally took the words right out of my mouth 🥹 It's the story of my life, being too scared to be myself and then around the right people I'm just a totally different person. It can totally get you down that was me for sure, that phase doesn't last forever though I promise 🙏🏽

@calliekatherine 11 ай бұрын

Hey! I just wanted to see that you put into words exactly what I am experiencing and going through in college right now. Wow, this is crazy that I’m not alone and someone else is feeling exactly the same. Hoping we can both eventually find our people!

@charlotte7590 9 ай бұрын

Thank you for this, it’s not talked about how you can be the most extroverted, friendly person and make the most effort and sometimes you still can’t seem to find your people. Hopefully it gets better but it can just be so difficult

@ChristinaAaliyah 8 ай бұрын

so true

@sasaha8389 5 ай бұрын

This loneliness is not my issue...its more the challenges the uni throws at me that i cant really deal alone, while i see everyone else dealing with it absolutely fine

@ChristinaAaliyah Жыл бұрын

feel like i could write a book about all the things no one tells you before you come to uni 😭😭

@alishanziro6011 Жыл бұрын

literally

@donatkentang7174 3 ай бұрын

please do omg i will read the entire book 😭😭

@littlecorporal4910 Жыл бұрын

Its not just introvert who struggle with making friends tho. As an autistic extrovert i find it difficult to progress conversations despite being naturally sociable because of my troubles with the cues. In other words, i like to play the game, but i struggle to pass the levels. Am told by people that i am "fun", "delightful", "full of vibes" etc. and yet have no close friends to back this personality up. I get stuck in the catch-22 of not picking up on the cues that gives me the green light on a person's interest in a friendship and am also reluctant to ask them to hang out as i worry im forcing things. I can't help but worry so much that my efforts to socialise in 2nd and 3rd year will go to waste because of this disability i never asked for. I can only pray that i meet people who get the literal aspect of my personality.

@ChristinaAaliyah Жыл бұрын

you seem really self aware 🥺 i'm sure you'll people your people one day, introverted or not uni can be a lonely place and it definitely takes longer than anticipated to meet the right people. I'm sorry you've not had the best experience so far, but you're defo not alone ❤️‍🩹

@joyfadele3104 9 ай бұрын

@@ChristinaAaliyahI am almost finished first year and still have no friends despite my best efforts to go to social events and societies in 2nd semester it’s difficult since everyone knows each other and I feel like no one really wants to make more freinds because everyone already has friends.its really hard to go to events by myself 😢

@miraofalltrades 8 ай бұрын

I was just about to comment this. So many people know who I am. I’m a “mini-bnoc”. They claim to like me and my vibes or whatever but I’m the one who’s always having to reach out to make plans because they have friendship groups that they instinctively make plans with all the time. I’m social but that doesn’t mean I want to be a floater. I’ve been forced to be a floater which means I don’t get the deep connections I need as an autistic person and I still spend most of my time alone. I have friends but I don’t have best friends or close friends. I don’t have the friendships I want. I’m about to finish my 2nd year and I’m very much losing hope that it’s even possible. Being an autistic extrovert is the worst.

@littlecorporal4910 8 ай бұрын

@@miraofalltrades I hope I'm not understating your own struggles by saying this, but it has got better for me. Close to finishing my second year, I have found myself in a good, close circle of friends by joining and being active in my uni's Model UN society. When I was told about it by one of my now-close friends (who at our first meeting was going through an autism assessment himself), he described it as a place that attracts the "quirky and nerdy" types of people that understand us autistics more than most. I'm in a separate group chat with them all as well as the main society chat, have celebrated my 21st birthday, and am looking forward to a beach outing this summer. I know it may seem hard, but the truth is that you do have a lot to offer, and if people don't want to give the same effort back, then they don't deserve your time effort or energy. Keep trying and seeking out spaces which may be more niche than others. As my mum said: "Look at all these freaks, and yet they love each other and it's a party". Sending my best wishes of luck and hope to you. May you find people who value you as a whole BNOC and not a mini one. ❤️❤️🙏🏿🙏🏿

@beautytips7779 4 ай бұрын

@@joyfadele3104 real same!!

@donatkentang7174 3 ай бұрын

NO because as you keep speaking i keep shouting "RIGHT!?!?!?" 🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️ your experience in 1st year is exactly what i'm feeling rn omg (i'm in my 1st year too) thank you for making this video i feel relieved that i'm not the only one struggling with this

@Vlogstafy Жыл бұрын

This video felt like a warm hug and I just want to send a warm hug right back at you. If you were in my uni we'd become friends so fast!

@ChristinaAaliyah Жыл бұрын

this is the nicest thing anyone could have ever said to me, I appreciate this 😭😭

@ailblentyn 8 ай бұрын

I found the pandemic incredibly healthy mentally. Not having to deal with a whole range of social stressors was great.

@fauzianalwoga 7 ай бұрын

I joined university without any friends and now am in my final year . I really don't care about having a lot of friends but what hurts is that i no longer have my mom. She was my best friend 😢

@markyiagroves4643 3 ай бұрын

Gurl it’s like we’re living the same life

@markyiagroves4643 3 ай бұрын

I’m in my second year and I got into a accident last year and I’m literally still grieving and I feel so alone without her

@fauzianalwoga 2 ай бұрын

@@markyiagroves4643oh dear 😢

@Skole-hj5xi 2 ай бұрын

im so glad you uplaoded this video made me feel so good. because i have "alot" of friends in my private life, but in Uni i have had the exact same situation as you. Expeccially when you try to talk with all and you keep forcing conversations, but in the end a few months later you still end up sitting alone, and even a few time hearing orther peoble talking bad about me. And no - I dont dress bad or smell or whatever, i have a good social life in my private life, is just in uni im like you. Thank you so much glad to hear im not the only one - im graduatining this summer, and i will earn more money then all of the classmates who talked bad about me, I will make sure they will regret their arrogance.

@estherighile Жыл бұрын

why is this so relateable? thxs for the video

@ChristinaAaliyah Жыл бұрын

i feel like we've all had the same experience 😫

@alishanziro6011 Жыл бұрын

btw i'm a loud outspoken person but I do rehearse convos before talking to the person, I used to have anxiety in primary and as a result became quiet, however in secondary became loud but it was a process. The trick is to get used to putting yourself out there despite what people think about you because you are the one that's going to regret it not them so who cares about what they believe. But it's honestly not easy, sometimes it's like I can feel my heart beating out my chest. Anyways if this is any help, I don't think anyone is born loud, especially me, and I also don't think u have to change your personality to get friends that aren't seasonal. Listen I can't wait to get to medical school to befriend you, I think you are more genuine and sincere, it takes a lot of courage to be vulnerable on a platform where there is hatred and the possibility of that people that know you to see you, this more credible than anyone loud friend that may be detached from their feelings can offer

@ChristinaAaliyah Жыл бұрын

thank you so much

@robin-hr7tc Жыл бұрын

Lmao this is the most relatable thing i ever seen your story seems like my life, I think I am gonna also be alone at uni because i am shy

@ChristinaAaliyah Жыл бұрын

I'm sure you won't I think i was just a hermit lool i shouldve gone out more 😅

@robin-hr7tc Жыл бұрын

@@ChristinaAaliyah haha thanks

@e.7085 Жыл бұрын

thank you i really needed this❤ i have had a similar experiance as you. i was very lonely in my first year in uni and didnt know anyone. in second year i tried to be more outgoing and go to places or events where i could meet people, but i didnt really make any friends. i do have a couple people that i go out with from time to time but i havent found a group of friends that i have clicked with yet. i am now in my third year and i have started to accept the situation and i don’t mind being alone for the most part cuz i’m so used to it now.

@ChristinaAaliyah Жыл бұрын

So many people have this experience at uni, to the point where I think it's there's more people are in our boat, than people in solid friendship groups :( you're definitely not alone. It's better to be alone that make friends with the wrong people too, I made that mistake before 😫

@rainbowcatwho Ай бұрын

im in my first year too, i feel the same! thank you christina for speaking my mind xx

@Dark_Blond_Noodles Күн бұрын

I just started college and I kinda hate it. I haven’t had a real close friend in years so I don’t have anyone I can rely on when I’m lonely. Social anxiety and depression keeps me from feeling normal around my classmates and I can’t even talk to my roommate without feeling extremely awkward. I’ve been alone for a long time but I’m still not used to the feeling :(

@proof2710 10 ай бұрын

Oh my god your video resonated with me soo much and I haven’t even finished watching it yet. My mindset is literally what you are explaining . Also a first year med student 😭 it feels soo incredibly lonely and at the same time oddly comforting being alone. I also honestly feel like such a boring person, I’m just so introverted 😭 where are the Waterstones dinner coffee shop people like you describe when you need them😅

@estrelletapolar Күн бұрын

I've made absolutely ZERO friends. Nobody else is alone but me, I genuinely don't know what to do, I've always been able to make friends straight away and now I just feel... Rejected? Part of the reason why I haven't made friends is because I didn't want to include myself in a group I don't feel comfortable with. I thought I'd eventually find my people but nobody seems to share my interests or personality (sweet, into anime, videogames etc.)

@miringuinasanchez9176 23 сағат бұрын

literally me

@maxdrumplayer 4 ай бұрын

Thanks so much for this honesty. I recently dropped out of University to move to another one this September ans this relates with me so much!❤ Thanks Christina! 😁

@shintori23 Жыл бұрын

First two minutes spoke to me and I’m trying my best 😭

@ChristinaAaliyah 11 ай бұрын

You got this Victoria

@nirina1445 Жыл бұрын

Thank you for your sharing excellent video !!

@ChristinaAaliyah Жыл бұрын

no probs nirina ✨

@SkullTheGuy 9 ай бұрын

Well i expected to find also freinds at uni or like group to study with but well sadly our expectations are not what the reality looks like. I feel like you have to be good at uni like getting good grades, being prepared etc. to get like attention and if you do that then they still dont take you, like that was my case and i think its bcs myb you are just ahead of them

@Arya72899 3 ай бұрын

I skipped classes due to loneliness in class but it now started affecting my uni criteria of 75% mandatory attendance, I mean fuck it I have to do it now, I am preparing myself, will be in class alone in 5 hours 😅❤

@malavikamohan2415 2 ай бұрын

Same here

@Arya72899 2 ай бұрын

@malavikamohan2415 must be in DU

@malavikamohan2415 2 ай бұрын

DU like in delhi uni?