Fidel Castro's Dairy Adventures

[@josephpaterson8274]

That's how he survived all the assassination attempts, his bones were too strong.

[@nickelmuncher]

Fuckin, Mr.Bones but he's the strongest material in the entire galaxy.

[@northernarctic8339]

The sad thing is that milk actually weakens your bones so my Commie boy was like a toothpick😂

[@nolongerusing7430]

@@northernarctic8339 wait what

[@northernarctic8339]

SG21337 yeah milk isn’t even that great for you at all.

[@asp6449]

Northern Arctic wrong, milk IS good for you, but our digestive systems aren’t made for milk. Which can lead to us dealing sick after eating milk, giving the illusion that it’s bad for you.

[@AbhNormal]

"I'm sorry, are you disrespecting my cheese?" sounds like something straight out of a Monty Python sketch

[@presidentofallfoodnice8113]

Yeah!

[@maomao6023]

“No we do not have any cheese in the cheese shop”

[@whatasurprise6908]

how dare you diss my cheese

[@scrubukkit1133]

"Blessed be the cheesemakers"

[@oferzilberman5049]

Too true

[@Halfendymion]

Just after the "he's lactose intolerant" part, my phone lost connection, so i just had to stare into dairy mans cold dead eyes as he reacted to the news.

[@Ihaveagasmask]

Just go back 60 seconds

[@Halfendymion]

@@Ihaveagasmask you've missed the point...

[@mirowhzo5750]

@@Ihaveagasmask Sadly doesn’t work if you loose internet connection completely

[@Ihaveagasmask]

@@mirowhzo5750 well the thing saves 60 seconds so you can keep watching a 60 second video

[@floorboard.25]

Cold- see what ya did there!

[@graggyicelan5416]

As cuban myself, Coppelia has the best ice cream u can imagine, it is an italian recipe actually so it explains a lot of things

[@Emilia-gw8so]

Scale of 1-10 how good?

[@journeytorainbownights]

Yo vivia en vedado cerca del coppelia, ojala volver :(

[@journeytorainbownights]

@@graggyicelan5416 no me referia literalmente, me explique mal lmfao. Solo decia ojala volver en el tiempo, cuando era pequeño y no tenia que preocuparme por mucho

[@ThatOneGuy-wr8rh]

ok now i do want to go to cuba sometime for like a 3 day vacation i wanna try that. (might fuck around and become a fascist dictator, we'll see)

[@MoonGuardian866]

@@graggyicelan5416 well thats expected from a man whos obsessed with it. Now the question is will the quality stands up now that the strictest quality controller is no more. Or will he haunts the place if the milkshake doesnt bring all the boys in the yard?

[@jestersareawesome4332]

The funny thing is that when this video came out Castro was still alive

[@AnonymousFrogNG]

Probably got a heart attack when he saw the video.

[@blizzard_the_seal9863]

Wait *_what_* I didn’t know that, holy hEck

[@TheUnoriginalDrCorgi]

Ikr

[@God-ch8lq]

@@AnonymousFrogNG he was busy eating 18 scoops of ice cream

[@AnonymousFrogNG]

@@God-ch8lq The two don't mix well.

[@BuckBlaziken]

I went to Coppelia back in 2018 and man that place was massive. Imagine a stadium but it’s like a massive atrium filled with stores and vendors that sell nothing but ice cream and cheese

[@frenchfriesG]

All that to sell 3 flavors of ice cream and a waiting line for hours

[@hicrazyedd2715]

80

[@thegreengamer5702]

That sounds like heaven

[@pastaroni8683]

@@thegreengamer5702 it would be hell if you were lactose intolerant

[@Lenlon703]

@@pastaroni8683 I'm a dairy loving lactose intolerant, bring the hell to me

[@dottyContrarian]

"I'm sorry *are you disrespecting my cheese?"*

[@neunleben1358]

"In My HoUsE, On My IsLaNd???"

[@SlothHub]

I like cheese It makes me weak at the knees So please let me receive The glorious cheese

[@brielle7226]

@@SlothHub *big shauq*

[@jackryan2612]

You disrespect the cheese, you disrespect me

[@brielle7226]

I can walk the cheese

[@ryanlong9800]

I love how the story of the CIA poisoning Fidel Castro's milkshake is one of the "less interesting" dairy related stories from Castro's life.

[@reinatr4848]

I mean, by one count, there were 638 such attempts.

[@joshc5613]

it's also one of the less interesting assassination attempts that was carried out. my favorite is still the one where the CIA hired his ex-lover to kill him, and then she ended up spilling the plan and having sex with him instead

[@totallynothatguy]

@@reinatr4848 That must just be a cover story for a milkshake company accidentally exporting contaminated milkshakes

[@MoonGuardian866]

Huh his milkshake really brings all the boys in the yard

[@urphakeandgey6308]

If you didn't think the CIA would try such a stunt, you're new to this world. It's less whacky compared to the more goofy stuff.

[@RockinPhil117]

Due to my dyslexia, I thought the video was titled "Fidel Castro's Diary Adventures" and that somehow Sam got a hold of Castro's personal diary and would read some wacky excerpts.

[@Hdusiekwbshsjs]

RockinPhil117 “Overthrew a fascist.” “Almost destroyed America.” “Milk lol.” “Dodged another assassination.”

[@azelfdaboi5265]

That would've been amazing tho

[@mynamo12]

RockinPhil117 I read that as diary too, except I’m not dyslexic.

[@ValsurPal]

due to my dyslexia, I kept reading diary as dairy and was very confused with this comment oof

[@anniedang2692]

By reading this comment, I finally realized this adventure about dairy did not come Fidel’s diary.

[@christopherholt6930]

Funny thing, there are miniature cows and they can produce about 1 gallon of milk per milking plus they can adapt to all environments.

[@sephikong8323]

We call them goats yes

[@gamingman2720]

Why are you reading this ? Ibdeed

[@nafismubashir2479]

Christopher Holt according to the Guiness book of world records the smallest cow in the world stands at a record 26 inches

[@milk4231]

Damn that’s small

[@okayne4800]

Even in space

[@JackOfAllTradersOriginal]

imagine if he became lactose intolerant in the middle of his life

[@marche800]

He would've just dedicated an entire research devision to finding a "cure" and then overdose on lactose pills

[@Shadow-gc6le]

I mean I doubt he would have been perturbed a lot of lactose intolerant people today barely care unless they have really bad reactions or cramping

[@AnonymousFrogNG]

Probably did, and that's not good if you are 90 years old.

[@adrianbigboss5685]

@@Shadow-gc6le Like me, I'm lactose intolerant and I love milk (I'm eating a bowl of cereal right now), I just fart a lot.

[@zhouhuanyue]

@@adrianbigboss5685 when I drink milk, it makes me super sick, lots comes out of both ends :")

[@meyekull]

I visited Cuba once, and I can say they had some of the best ice cream I’ve ever had. Castro had something going right.

[@parkerlong2658]

I imagine a large part of it was embargos. A big problem with Cuba before Castro was basically that all of the sugar it produced would be shipped to America and the. Products would be shipped back to Cuba and marked up by a thousand percent. Things like candy and icecrean flavored with sugar where things that mostly happened because of Cuban farmers toiling on plantations owned by Americans and aristocrats. I imagine to him it was mostly a mission to make it so Cuba could make the product many of these people worked so hard to produce in the past and bring it to there families. Reason I say this is because Castro is well known for having projects like these and also he for any fault he had started everything because of his experience being the son of a shitty plantation owner( he was a bastard so he slept in a shed) Also ice cream is badass

[@jsquared1013]

@@parkerlong2658 a "large part of it" was the authoritarian imposition of an economic system that has failed every time it was tried and has led to poverty and hardship in every instance.

[@theyabib3323]

​@@jsquared1013Laughable. So Haiti the highly neoliberal country is so much better? Also funny this implies Cuba was better before... No it was basically an economic US colony, where slavery was still a thing under a horrible corrupt dictatorship. Comparably it got muuuuch better. Also mean to tell me the US isn't authoritarian? Where do we always hear about police brutality? Who has the highest prison population? To think the US government, which has terrorised and killed millions of people in the name of economic interest and political power, has any moral high ground to impose an embargo which has deprived regular citizens of medical aid and access to basic needs is utterly absurd. Every single UN member country has voted against the embargo as unhumanitarian (besides Israel and the US), so the consensus is also quite clear. Stop the embargo.

[@JohnBrown-tw2qi]

@@jsquared1013you know he was elected right? Do you even know what communism is specifically?

[@PuzzlingGoal]

@@jsquared1013 *SLIGHT COMPLIMENT TOWARDS NON-US ALIGNED COUNTRY DETECTED. EMERGENCY GOMMUNISM COPYPASTA DEPLOYED*

[@barokle]

Fun fact, there’s a street in Ecuador called Castro’s cow

[@miikkasihvonen8612]

What...

[@kazmakazii]

@@jaystreet46 this comment is kinda gay bro

[@jaystreet46]

@@kazmakazii I know that’s what I said! Just a bit more eloquently than you

[@co8ku]

@@jaystreet46 no you are just a boring person

[@unequivocalsuffering2734]

They named a street after his mother?

[@jer_e4806]

"What if we make cows, that are the size of dogs..." So... A Goat?

[@blizzard_the_seal9863]

hmmmmm _tilts screen_

[@ScarletCandlelight]

Jer_E yes but aparently a goat is not enough for some people.

[@poppyperidot94]

But goat milk taste nastu and the cheese is OK

[@ScarletCandlelight]

Poppy Peridot your just getting the wrong milk. Each goat breed has another taist. To be more like cow you need Nubian or Nigerian dwarf milk. They have a high butter fat like cows milk makes it sweeter and creamyer. Other goats are more water taisting not as thick and known for their volume they milk at. Lastly needs to be from a dairy that keeps the bucks far away from the does when they are in milk. The buck musk makes the does have bad taisting milk. Its all about the herd you get your milk from

[@norvindadealmeidabrandao6981]

What about goats the size of a cow?!

[@KentuckyFriedChildren]

Note: Castro Died only a couple of months after this video was posted, meaning it's entirely possible FIDEL CASTRO saw this video.

[@vale3242]

"Wow."

[@randomfur4202]

Huh. Every day you learn some more

[@yipee11037]

And this is true. He died on November 15th of 2016. Only four months after the publishing of this video.

[@randomfur4202]

@@yipee11037 this video killed him

[@phaseshifter3d455]

Pretty sure he was busy, y'know. slowly dying. And didn't have time for KZbin.

[@leovenegas5338]

Fun Fact: I've actually been to Copellia, and it's still one of the best looking parts of the entire city of Havana.

[@bruhsauce644]

yeah was the ice cream tasty

[@terrestrialcreature7481]

@@bruhsauce644 I’m pretty sure they also have tons of smaller copellias all over Cuba. Oh and yeah it’s good.

[@Ihaveagasmask]

@@terrestrialcreature7481 yeah that’s just like having one super store per country and no other store

[@ICantThinkOfAFunnyHandle]

that's not saying much when Havana looks like shit

[@volc9464]

USA:Is building nuclear missiles USSR:Is building space satellites Cuba:Is creating super cows

[@sapomercador7257]

I would pay to see super cows destroying satellites and nuclear weapons

[@dolphingoreeaccount7395]

Lol

[@gandalf_thegrey]

sometimes even a dictatorship can do good I mean, he completely ignored that he's on Cuba and that there is a reason why there are no cows, but at least he tried to share Ice cream and dairy products with his comrades.... or something.

[@EEEEEEEE]

‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎E

[@volc9464]

volc

[@Fr4ncM]

Imagine WWIII kickstarting just because Castro dissed the French's cheese.

[@Jokuman357]

The French would just wave a flag whiter than the finest dairy 🏳

[@spring1242]

Yeah because France and Cuba were relevant world powers

[@Fr4ncM]

@@spring1242 Unlike Austria-Hungary, right? I mean there is no way a random nation could bring the world to that...

[@user-ft3jq5vi2l]

Well, they did invade mexico in 1838 because of some soldier's vandalization of a cake shop (there were tensions already, but that was used as the justificating cassus belli).

[@scooperdooper4097]

@@spring1242 cuba was allies with the soviets, so if france decided to use the dissing of cheese to declare war, the soviet union would declare wwar on france, the americans would declare war on the soviets, so on and so on, and the world litteraly ends

[@williamsmeds1368]

2:45 those cows have 4 legs and a hand. *What?*

[@Deutalios818]

Dude, idk

[@vinesauceobscurities]

These are actually their love shafts.

[@kuraes]

its their udders

[@stinkydonuts5533]

It’s UDDER art... ok I’ll stop now

[@IllDieAlone0818]

What u talking about I see no problem

[@ladyivers]

To this day, you get more jail time for killing a cow in Cuba than you do for killing a person. Castro deadass valued cows over people and that law IS STILL A THING

[@bandable]

I need to move

[@thatfiremanguy3033]

Wait, so are hamburgers and food made of cow outlawed or do they have a pass or use a substitute meat?

[@bandable]

@@thatfiremanguy3033 human meat maybe?

[@terrestrialcreature7481]

@@thatfiremanguy3033 Cow meat exists its just more expensive. Pretty sure it takes paperwork to kill a cow even if its your own.

[@ladyivers]

@@thatfiremanguy3033 well they don’t have fast food there AND cow meat is owned entirely by the Cuban government so as long as its sold by government owned restaurants (which is all of them unless you illegally have your own restaurant) then it’s fine to eat if you pay for it, though it’s usually overpriced and not that good since like sam said, cows don’t thrive in Cuba so the meat isn’t the best. Hope this helps clear that up! :)

[@BestgirlJordanfish]

"He went intercontinentally ballistic" is the best line I've ever heard.

[@Abdul0151]

"India hasn't got shit on Castro's cos worshipping" hahahaha

[@ourboyroy9398]

Udderly superior

[@goldenkaleo]

"Whats a nigga gotta do to get some eel dick" - sam

[@thesuperj2511]

Jordan Nguyen I CBM to make a good pun

[@everythingyouneed8957]

Jordan Nguyen k

[@Warshotqt]

Wow that’s crazy, I lived in Cuba for the first 10 years of my life and even went to Copelia, but never had any idea why it was built... this explains so much why it looks out of place. Honestly the buildings nearby aren’t that well taken care of to say the least.

[@amletomonacelli22]

Que se siente haber escapado del comunismo bro

[@presidentofallfoodnice8113]

@@amletomonacelli22 zebu

[@Ruanki46]

I was born in Cuba and lived there till I was 5 until I moved to the US. I can’t believe how lucky I was to leave that poverty strucken place. Unfortunately I still have a lot of family over there but I’m still 13 so it’s not like I can help a lot yk

[@amletomonacelli22]

@@Ruanki46 That happens when a commie is a leader... i'm glad you're aware of your luck bro, many americans don't.

[@cam_sus]

@@Ruanki46 Good luck bro

[@gizmo_gadgets6482]

“I’m sorry are you disrespecting my cheese? In my house? *On my island* ?!”

[@spideraba769]

At this time of year? At this time of day?

[@Cinnamon_Rolls_Out_Of_The_Oven]

on my country on my earth In my Milky Way In my universe

[@sla-l5n]

*our jkjk i'm kidding its a joke

[@MegaDarkmane]

In front of my salad Made exclusively from 38 different cheeses?

[@Distantexplosion1076]

in my TIMELINE!?

[@sj1productions68]

The dog-sized cow thing is actually real now. There's even a farmer in Iowa who has been breeding and selling miniature cattle so people can keep them as pets. Seems Fidel was ahead of his time on that one.

[@Dokataa]

Goats have existed for thousands of years

[@dv9239]

There's a guy in India selling micro mini cows Smaller than dogs

[@robertw6894]

*_Calcium Castro: Bone is unbreakable._*

[@DesiraiX16]

Phantom dairy Calcium tendency Lactose Crusaders Bone is unbreakable Golden Milk

[@lorenzo7402]

Broke: JoJo Woke: CaCa

[@burnstjamp]

Dairy Ocean Calcium Bone Run IceCreamium

[@jackryan2612]

Wtf is going on

[@robertw6894]

@@jackryan2612 my thought exactly

[@begerbingchilling]

the worst part is that you're not making this up

[@lukejohns5900]

The Tactical Guy you commies need to get it together

[@icameherejusttocomment550]

Mr. Murica Excuse me?! We COULD revolt and create a perfect utopia, if we WERE together.

[@majinbros9971]

+SFSR Ball agreed SFSR ball

[@lukejohns5900]

SFSR Ball a perfect utopia of purges?

[@icameherejusttocomment550]

Mr. Murica Stalinism =\= Communism, and plus Capitalist Conservative pigs like you have purges, they're called 'imprisonment' (although to be more specfic, it's drug addiction and minor crime imprisonment) and you enslave and have people partying while millions starve.

[@amphafan3364]

This was the first time a story sounded so stupid that I had to research.

[@qaseemtak9368]

Is it mostly true? (Too lazy to do research)

[@amphafan3364]

Qaseem Tak it's completely true:D

[@qaseemtak9368]

Amphafan noice

[@lethos8811]

I grew up in cuba and even tho I was born after ubre blanca died i still know her story, because castro made her legacy last long

[@jacobhayes5245]

You must not keep up with the news.

[@breadcrumbhoarder]

I visited Coppelia when I went to Cuba, the ice cream is pretty good and they served it with fruit which was great. Unfortunately we had to go to the visitors section because the complex actually has a section for Cuban citizens only. It’s not a whole city block but it’s still really big like an outdoor amphitheater and it’s in a nicer area for the most part, though everywhere is poor

[@casenalesi5661]

The three C's of Castro Communism Cuba Calcium

[@gdolphinz7486]

4. *C O W S*

[@Circ00mspice]

So Castro doesn't begin with "C"?

[@himister2516]

5. Castration

[@rbvfeehfbudenrj]

*_-Colf-_*

[@kaitlyngrove4550]

Castro, Communism, Cuba, Calcium, Cows, Cheese

[@_sky_3123]

Castro: "I want a dog-sized cow." Scientists:" Eh,, my commesar. We call that a goat ."

[@ldobehardcore]

Was about to say that. "You want a dog-sized cow that's heat resistant and can live in a confined space? That's a goat."

[@PRGME7]

_Sky_ *our

[@strionic770]

That was my first thought, why not import this magical thing called a "goat"

[@Demonslayer20111]

Because goat milk is a lot more salty than cow milk

[@mogyesz9]

@@Demonslayer20111 Also smells fucking terrible, the cheese is good though.

[@trenvert123]

**Laced milkshake brings Fidel to the yard** **He says, it's better than yours** **He insists, it's better than yours** **Agree or get the firing squad**

[@alanmalan2644]

Wife of Kastro was kinsman of Tito - last dictator of Cuba, Kastro was sun of landlord from family of spanish colonisators in last , father hate this seeing died before time of revilution, he take lands from landlord and himself and give that to farmers (slaves became farmers) in first days when he came to the power, he rebuild Cuba from colony with slaves and landlord that supported by US mafia and CIA like big american kazino with drugs and bichs that and how are poor slaves of landlords how can't to buy something without that they do in land of landlord to Republic with socialist way of development , Kuba have most highest level of medicine in the world today, but life under US sanctions and without support of Soviet Union still very poor this days, you know anything about Kuba without propaganda that named Kastro by dictator

[@pancake1781]

Alan Malan jesus what language are you speaking

[@gdolphinz7486]

Alan Malan *I’m sorry, W H A T*

[@Dokataa]

Are you making the milkshake to the yard joke? It's not very good and if not you had a prime opportunity

[@epicswirl]

MainCherry why are you contradicting yourself

[@Rice_Wolf]

“At this point, the average dairy queen would have given up” *”but castro’s more that a dairy queen”* *”HE’S A DAIRY DICTATOR”*

[@eevee7663]

OH MY GOD DID YOU WATCH THE EXACT SAME VIDEO AS EVERYONE ELSE AND LAUGHED AT THE SAME JOKE THAT WAS PUT INTO THE EXACT SAME VIDEO THAT EVERYONE ELSE WHO WATCHED THIS VIDEO ALSO SAW OH WOW HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA I'M DYING AND I AM SO GLAD YOU DECIDED TO MAKE THIS AMAZING TOP TIER NOBEL PRIZE NOMINEE OF A COMMENT, HAIL 2 YOU MF

[@wasp795]

ok

[@BrendanRader-n4p]

ok

[@Rice_Wolf]

@@BrendanRader-n4p ok

[@evilgrandmaofficial]

What I love about Sam’s drawings is when you first see them you go “what the fuck is that” but when you google a picture of the actual thing you go “yeah okay that kinda looks like it” The Copellia is a great example

[@user-mg7wh8zq6v]

Im sorry, did u just disrespected Sam's artistic expression and capability, on his video, on his channel?

[@daisybell5884]

So you're telling me Fidel Castro was the living embodiment of a got milk ad?

[@howardbaxter2514]

Yes.

[@kurinthekitty6842]

There's just a poster of him in cow out fit saying "¿Tienes Leche?"(Got Milk?)

[@jackniessen]

Idk why but the thought of Castro speaking in English with Sam’s voice is udderly hilarious to me

[@kevenwang2250]

bruh the pun 'udderly'

[@malicexvii7905]

@@kevenwang2250 Sam already made that pun in the video and it was far funnier when he did it.

[@9inchpp]

Castro can speak English just fine

[@ChaplainBobWalkerBTh]

Castro attended Harvard so his English was likely better than many.

[@b3nl555]

I wish people would stop milking this joke

[@lordedmundblackadder9321]

"Castro's dairy adventures" sounds like either silence shitty documentary for kids about how calcium is for thicc bones, or the greatest porno ever made.

[@1leon000]

i don't wanna think about the second one I DON'T WANNA THINK ABOUT THE SECOND ONE-

[@BronzetheGolden]

Elaborate please

[@thatGuy-wm2cr]

@@BronzetheGolden replace dairy with the that’s white and associated with pornos

[@isaiahp.4609]

Castro’s Bizarre Adventure

[@spaghetti5914]

🤨📸

[@toast8086]

When he finds out that he lives in the milky way *nut*

[@Jsbt123]

LMFAOOOOO

[@jimhalpert9803]

Underrated comment lmfao

[@gagiibaaji2774]

Yeah

[@JimmyBoy9878]

@@dontreadmydescription4473 Weak

[@sirlambchops.]

@XxBean_PlayzxX Yes, he drinks so much milk he nuts milk

[@DomanicGamingYT]

I thought he would say *CASTRONAUT* instead of Astronaut.

[@MrSnaztastic]

That sounds kinda.. painful...

[@mcvibing2785]

@@MrSnaztastic NO

[@thotusmaximus971]

Missed opportunity

[@moshiurrahman52]

Will regret forever for the mistake

[@dontreadmydescription4473]

DONT READ” MY DESCRIPTION!1

[@mrmaniac3]

3:39 um excuse me Castronaut

[@latinospammer8441]

Badum pshh

[@sarahmchugh4169]

Thank you comrade.

[@ASkittishRaven]

Lol... I laugh at dumb jokes.......

[@Spr1ditis]

I thought the same thing just a year later xd

[@candycorn-]

'BA DUM _snaps neck_

[@frenchfriesG]

The plan of a giant air conditioner is real, but he didn’t end like that. He said that the Canadian cows could produce the same amount of milk only refrigerating their heads so he ordered to build a kind of air conditioned tunnel where cows put their heads while milking the body on the outside. I’m Cuban :)

[@GameMasterWLC]

Neat, it's been 5 months but has life in Cuba been good to you lately?

[@julian23561]

@@GameMasterWLC I'm interested as well. Say hi to him for me if you get a reply

[@Ihaveagasmask]

Does work

[@kakalimukherjee3297]

Even more hilarious

[@rbunebula_1551]

@@GameMasterWLC they probably live in Miami

[@tobybackscratcher4706]

Fidel Castro: I like long walks on the beach, milk, and surviving assassination attempts

[@hicrazyedd2715]

100

[@imbob99999]

638 of 'em, in fact

[@MemeFinds]

Other ducuments about fidel: "what drove fidel to the cuban missle crisis" Sama o'nalla: "why fidel loved dairy so much

[@draxxychan]

Sama n'olla lmao? Learn to spell.

[@CocoWantsACracker]

Let's be honest: this story is a lot more interesting and original. The missile crisis just came down to: "Hey, we tossed out my big neighbor, but he won't stop bullying us and talking smack about us to everyone. Now we have no friends and we're all going to die. Dude, you always stand up against that bully; won't YOU be my friend? You can put some missiles here in return." Nothing too surprising there. But this dairy story... It almost makes Fidel seem like a human being with a good side, a bad side AND some funny quirks!

[@dilophosaurussk4333]

@@draxxychan Sam-sama

[@coronaexe884]

almost got a stroke from reading this

[@victoracosta4796]

That’s why we love Sam O’Nella. He talks about the WTF parts of history nobody would talk about.

[@angelserenade]

"Udderly superior" "they are not *laughing cows* by any means" "path to the MILKY-way" The writing is so clever!

[@thebluefox6494]

AlphaIkaros it’s udderly superior

[@urielseptim910]

He milked the writing for everything it had.

[@Kyzr_Signal]

What dairing comment.

[@alextull8251]

how TITIllating

[@Azrielfiend]

very cheesy jokes

[@SHDW-nf2ki]

benito mussolini: *literally lives off two glasses of milk a day fidel castro: FINALLY. A WORTHY OPPONENT.

[@fishthealmighty3220]

“Like the time the CIA tried to poison his milkshake” EXCUSE ME WHAT? THIS HAPPENED???

[@joshellsworth355]

The US tried to kill him over 600 times, this was one of em

[@miketrujillo3677]

I heard they even put a bomb in one of his cigars, and one in his phone

[@gummihu]

@@cormacabbey2404 professionals as in getting paid for it , or as in being good at it because... you know... Castro

[@darpro0457]

Didn’t they also rig a cigar of his with an explosive

[@DustyHoney]

Cormac Abbey “like our own” you say it like you’re proud of your country’s actions. Also, not everyone on the internet is American FYI. I know it’s hard for Americans to understand they’re not the only country with internet access, don’t worry.

[@NytanThePetLobsterEnthusiast]

He also loved surviving assassination attempts

[@maximusstirnimus5210]

Saw someone say that he had plot armour because he was the protagonist of the story lol.

[@StrabbyStrabby]

It was all that calcium

[@abelwaite2016]

And cigars

[@garbagebin3667]

i think everyone likes surviving assassination attempts

[@niger216]

@@garbagebin3667 bin Laden doesn't

[@honeyyoumeanhunk_ules4410]

It took me until halfway through this video to realise that it was called “Castro’s Dairy” not “Castro’s Diary”....

[@Grongle4]

Diary Of A Cuban Dictator

[@ANDROLOMA]

Dairy of Anne Frank.

[@samsamthetrashcan]

*Dyslexia has entered the chat*

[@benphenicie]

"But like the astronaut he is, Castro held on to his dream of finding the Milky Way." Sam O'Nella humor hits different. I love it.

[@mokebanana]

0:35 "dairy farmers"? oh sir, i think you mean "the milk people"?

[@seigyert5245]

Moke Banana a

[@stinkiestman398]

b

[@matthewsher7801]

Great trump reference

[@lazy_artist3246]

Moke Banana Or me? I love milk ._.

[@gameslayer404]

*milk men

[@il-dottore]

Wouldn't Castro want his son to be Lactose Intolerant? That would mean more Dairy for him.

[@Jessica-eo5hg]

YEAH

[@azelfdaboi5265]

Makes sense

[@ycasto1063]

Thats not how communism works duh

[@kacperszatko8192]

I was thinking the same. Sister's breast milk is still a milk

[@whafflete6721]

umm this is cuba not alabama

[@lrballistics]

"I'm sorry are you disrespecting my cheese?" - Sheogorath 4E 201

[@brandonhall6048]

Dothurnaax wabbajack

[@benediktbroeerken2777]

A man of kultuture i see

[@nickd.9955]

Do you mind? I'm busy doing the Fish Stick. It's a very delicate state of mind!

[@brandonhall6048]

Nick D. 😂😂😂

[@covfefecafe9947]

Ah, the wabbajack. Turning dragons into chickens and chickens into rabbits.

[@alexgrip8813]

Fun fact, when swedish prime minister Olof Palme visited Cuba as the first western leader to do so, Castro asked (among other things) how much milk swedish cows produce. Palme didn't know (I guess most people doesn't know how much milk ones nations cows produce).

[@rama.arian96]

Castro: *eats 18 scoops of ice cream after a meal* Kim jong un: are u challenging me?

[@lincolncarvalho8739]

Finally, a worthy opponent!

[@lukasbajorenas6357]

ahhahahahhahahhahahahahahahhahahahahhahahahahahhahahahhahahahhahahahahhahahahahahahhahahahahhahhahhahHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHhahahahahahhahahahahahha

[@grayghosts]

Donald trump has entered the chat.

[@PSIgmr]

People in North Korea: you guys have meals?

[@pancakedestroyer5289]

Hes ded

[@Tewemeh2ter]

2:30 can we acknowledge this amazing frame for a second. Just forget why it’s there and just imagine you saw this with no context.

[@lewis261]

And this: 4:11

[@Tewemeh2ter]

I’m actually laughing my ass off

[@sumvs5992]

It's a perfect representation of any communist leader with their usage of their country

[@empblaze2146]

@@lewis261 not gonna lie it looks like nut

[@birbbos219]

@@empblaze2146 the cow nut is the best nut

[@radosawmichapiwko7141]

I just added Copelia to my "I have to see this" list.

[@awildfilingcabinet6239]

We’re actually going there on a trip. I’m about to get an American outsider’s perspective on how it be

[@Danez1342]

As a Cuban this is the most hilariously thing I’ve ever heard, the mention of Copelia took me out of commission 😂

[@fahadalghamdi9316]

hope things are gettting better with you guys! stay safe and awesome out there!

[@Danez1342]

@@fahadalghamdi9316 thank you, sadly it gets worse everyday, many die from hunger or from standing up to the “government”, and the economy gets worse and more corrupted every day. But that will never stop us from laughing, having fun, and surviving. Hopefully life takes action and truly gives us freedom in our own country. And if your wondering about Copelia, there is only one Copelia still open in cuba(in Havana) and they only serve 3 or 4 flavors(vanilla, chocolate, strawberry, and sometimes neopoliton)

[@transturtlegames1212]

I think Castro produced his own milk when he first saw Ubre Blanca if you know what I'm saying

[@wrenthdavis5174]

He certainly had an udder of his own.

[@FinalFoxFeistyFox]

Ogh eewww

[@yoda9098]

bruh

[@lucyschraff4893]

How do I delete another person’s account

[@Bluemilk92]

Actually I don't know what you're saying. I need you to explain in *great detail,* what it is you're trying to get across.

[@Haloslayer46]

but what about the people who were Lack toast in tall or rent

[@SalItzMed]

Lack toast in tall or rent. Yes.

[@qaiser648]

Veitnam flash back Oscar The Grouch lack toast in tall or rent lmao

[@skeletonz7924]

Veitnam flash back Oscar The Grouch Lack toast in tall or rent 💀😂😭

[@zurnan1953]

It's lactose intolerant

[@Haloslayer46]

Dr. J. Bright Thanks Captain obvious

[@philhayes3781]

Just imagine how strong his bones are

[@Static3649]

* boulder falls onto his head* * isn't crushed by boulder* Cia: well, we tried.

[@bradleymcewen4654]

Too much dairy has the opposite effect :)

[@jackduggan4669]

@@bradleymcewen4654 are...are you a vegan?

[@Accrovideogames]

Studies have shown that too much milk can make your bones brittle. Moderation is key. Even too much water can be lethal. Look up water intoxication.

[@Zombiegg101]

@@Accrovideogames Fucker still overstayed his welcome tho

[@smnkumarpaul]

There is actally an indian cow breed small enough to live inside the house. Breed name is Punganur, it is also known for producing good milk.

[@ushalabotha9659]

I just googled Punganur, they are adorable

[@pramanabudiman9761]

I looked it up as well, I'm pretty sure this what Fidel Castro was thicking about when he mentioned "Doggie Cow".

[@samwolfenstein5239]

"I would cut myself, were I to bleed cheese"

[@radopon]

Levels of milk loving from lowest to highest: 1. I don’t look like milk 2. Milk is interesting 3. Milk is delicious 4. Milk is the best 5. Milk is my water 6. I wish I have an udder 7. I wish I bleed milk 8. Bones hard as Minecraft bedrock 9. Fidel Castro

[@Nobelk12]

D A N I DEVS

[@jakethegreatestofalltime]

Ima 7

[@herculesmclovin]

Dairy actual leaches calcium from your bones... Don't believe the hype lol

[@radopon]

Joe Callister if what you say is true, then my skeleton would have fallen apart by now. And also, that fact only works for people who are lactose intolerant.

[@herculesmclovin]

Health implications of dairy consumption. 1. 1/4 to 1/3 cup of dairy milk per day is associated with a 30% increased risk of breast cancer. One cup daily= 50% Up to two cups= 70-80%: academic.oup.com/ije/advance-article-abstract/doi/10.1093/ije/dyaa007/5743492?redirectedFrom=fulltext 2. The New England Journal of Medicine, raises questions about milk’s purported benefits and dairy’s impact on the planet: www.forksoverknives.com/new-harvard-review-finds-little-evidence-dairy-supposed-health-benefits?_ke=eyJrbF9lbWFpbCI6ICJkcnNib2JhbmRsaXpAeWFob28uY29tIiwgImtsX2NvbXBhbnlfaWQiOiAiS0NITkVhIn0%3D#gs.yceikv 3. Drinking cow's milk raises IGF-1 [growth hormones] IGF-1 increases when cows are injected with rBGH [synthetic hormone to increase milk production] and again when milk is pasteurized. The ingestion and absorption of IGF-1 by humans has shown to be a risk factor for breast cancer and gastrointestinal cancer: www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/8932606 4. Women who consumed four or more servings of dairy products each day were twice as likely to develop serous ovarian cancer as those who consumed two or fewer servings of dairy products each day: ajcn.nutrition.org/content/80/5/1353.abstract?ijkey=f32e0c0c9e1a6d310919598b1448fbe4cc588fe3&keytype2=tf_ipsecsha 5. Consumption of milk and other dairy products leads to an increased risk of prostate cancer: www.goldjournal.net/article/S0090-4295(00)00974-2/abstract 6. Cow's milk can have a calcium leaching effect, which explains why osteoporotic bone fracture rates are highest in countries that consume the most dairy. Vegetarians will most likely have healthier outcomes for a host of chronic diseases by limiting or avoiding milk and other dairy products. All nutrients found in milk are readily available in healthier foods from plant sources: ajcn.nutrition.org/content/89/5/1638S.full 7. After controlling for known risk factors and current milk consumption, each additional glass of milk per day during teenage years was associated with a significant 9% higher risk of hip fracture in men: www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/24247817 8. High milk intake was associated with higher mortality in one cohort of women and in another cohort of men, and with higher fracture incidence in women: www.bmj.com/content/349/bmj.g6015 9. In multiple studies, drinking cow’s milk was linked to an increased prevalence and severity of acne in both boys and girls: onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/10.1111/j.1365-4632.2009.04002.x/full 10. Harvard overview on milk and health: www.hsph.harvard.edu/nutritionsource/what-should-you-eat/calcium-and-milk/calcium-full-story 11. Scientific evidence that questions health benefits and indicates potential health risks: www.pcrm.org/health/diets/vegdiets/health-concerns-about-dairy-products 12. Major studies suggesting a link between milk and prostate cancer have appeared in medical journals since the 1970s: www.pcrm.org/health/health-topics/milk-and-prostate-cancer-the-evidence-mounts 13. The milk protein, casein, promotes the proliferation of prostate cancer cells such as PC3 and LNCaP: www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC4166373 14. In all mammals except Neolithic humans, postnatal activation of mTORC1 by milk intake is restricted to the postnatal lactation period. It is of critical concern that persistent hyperactivation of mTORC1 [due to continued dairy intake] is associated with aging and the development of age-related disorders: www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/26225961

[@aimeemcgregor2789]

"There's plenty of other miscellanies stories surrounding his little preoccupation like the time the CIA tried to poisson his milkshake..." No hold on, could you elaborate on that?

[@Mac-nw3uc]

600 attempts were made by the CIA and FBI to assassinate fidel castro, it required a worker at the restuarant to place a pill in his milkshake that would kill him, but the pill burst in the fridge and it was failed

[@macaroon_nuggets8008]

Poisson is french for fish.

[@klenovyysirop12]

@@macaroon_nuggets8008 Thank you what I can only assume is the American Education System

[@macaroon_nuggets8008]

@@klenovyysirop12 "CIA tried to poisson his milkshake"

[@klenovyysirop12]

@@macaroon_nuggets8008 Okay yeah I didn't see that. I thought you were just talking about french for some reason.

[@blu9419]

i have rewatched all of your videos at least 20 times

[@MetalEater13]

"They are UDDERLY superior" criminally underrated pun.

[@aryapatel1932]

*udderrated

[@leoshork]

I noticed that too, I wondered whether that was a coincidence or on purpose

[@YTLSF]

In 1998 when he came to Switzerland he visited my mother's cousin's dairy farm in order to discuss their ways of producing Gruyere cheese and breeding Holstein cows, I was just a few days old at that time but he still has pictures of him with the Cuban leader in his house now!

[@MisterTipp]

YTLSF you must post those pictures somewhere!

[@diecar128]

YTLSF wow that's pretty cool

[@hbq76]

I feel like this is too odd a story to be made up

[@Kevin-mk6tf]

Welp, he died in 2016.... he will be missed as the man who almost started another war and one of the best revolutionaries out there.

[@icantcomeupwithagoodusername]

Thats cool. You should post it somewere.

[@gorami]

no one: Castro at important foreign meetings: so what ice cream do u like?

[@Overlord99762]

You lactose intolerant?

[@TheEsdaniel]

That would certainly brake the ice , I would do it

[@nickelmuncher]

Mint cookies n' cream.

[@detol2in1fabriccleaner45]

I like your name

[@averongodoffire8098]

Having a Frenchman eat your cheese and then ask if it’s better than the French variety you might as well spit on the flag itself lol It’s like if someone said “we make pretty good syrup, probably better than yours” To a Canadian it just hits a part of your core ya know

[@corn58]

Dairy Queen Castro: 😒 Dairy *dictator* Castro: 😏

[@franciscomm7675]

LOL

[@mr.funmanman5621]

brimreaper 1104 (“

[@juliaguan5153]

Don't you mean DICKtator?

[@efrenangeles7386]

I wouldn't like to be called the opposite of my gender too. XD

[@juliaguan5153]

@@efrenangeles7386 sorry if i offended anyone. That was only joke that popped up in my head. Didnt realize that it was bad until i got reminded like after 3 weeks

[@gulliver831]

"This bitch still juicy" * derp cow draw * Man i love this channel.

[@somehater5628]

gulliver 449 likes but no replies

[@somehater5628]

gulliver feelsbadman

[@lmaoxdgoem6933]

gulliver durp? wit year u in

[@6sal6em6]

Anyone who says derp now will be shot by a sniper

[@Jay13340]

Alex Derp Derp Derp Derp Derp Derp Derp Derp Derp Derp Derp Derp Derp Derp Derp Derp Derp Derp Derp Derp

[@alecnava5465]

He can't enjoy dairy no mo

[@Sara3346]

*no moo, you mean.

[@Squeaks]

you beat me to it 1 month early

[@therealbetenoire2226]

Hyru two months :-;

[@jakobzilinski6273]

Spiciest Meme Lord Alec I

[@wumbo1833]

Too soon

[@xxfoxcakqxx9293]

"He also tried to create house cows, but this failed" oh wait until he meets Rani the world's smallest cow

[@eatyourcereal7840]

Cuban-CASTRO THAT MILKSHAKE WAS POISONED BY THE CIA DONT DRINK IT!!! *slurp* Cuban-are u still drinking it Castro-But it’s my favorite flavor

[@bairdmccarthy3148]

Nah dude, the CIA never got the poison into the milkshake because the guy who was supposed to put in the capsule accidentally got it stuck to the side of the fridge and it broke open when he tried taking it out.

[@LoydAvenheart]

we atched the asam vide mcar?

[@Shaymin0]

Sir you favorite flavor is chocolate. That is strawberry. "But it's milky goodness!"

[@Zombiegg101]

If a Cuban knew that Fidel was about to drink poison, they wouldn't tell him, trust me, we hated him

[@sa-uw2vn]

Baird McCarthy wasn’t it in the freezer? that’s why it exploded, because of the colder temperatures of the freezer compared to the fridge.

[@mlepperian]

Some random guy:disrespects Castro's cheese Castro:so you have chosen... Death

[@OffGridInvestor]

Lucky it wasn't a missile strike if it involved Cuba.

[@shleemyd8169]

Glad to see Ross made the list for his milk chugging skills

[@normal-potato05]

EXACTLY, you’re the first person to mention Ross in this comment section that I’ve come across

[@CallenderMan]

@@normal-potato05 Glad to know I'm not the only one (in the past day, even) searching for someone who noticed the joke about Ross.

[@pitchforkmechanic7797]

“The breeding efforts were mostly a BUST” this was way funnier than I think it was meant to be

[@troglodytes3041]

Ccommunism and Dairy is a great way to start your morning.

[@PRGME7]

hairysquatch *our

[@troglodytes3041]

@@PRGME7 Our bad commrade

[@fadjan9998]

COMMMMMIE! COMMMMIE! REEEEEEEEEEE!

[@kams8759]

*mourning

[@Rockzilla1122]

ha food and communism nice joke bud

[@zasmrcaveman5725]

😂"fuck him it's good cheese"😂

[@OHYS]

Z ASMR Caveman, Omg lol haha

[@Fijilost]

Z ASMR Caveman Thats what my dad said when i said the cheese expired

[@luke2660]

RIP THE DAIRY KING

[@luke2660]

*Dictator

[@majinbros9971]

+Luke Grzywacz How dare you call communist king?!

[@m654z]

*Queen

[@theshuman100]

hail the dairy dic

[@pizzatime3367]

Dairy Dictator!

[@tim.noonan]

0:16 I’m American and even I’m pretty sure Castro wasn’t really the antagonist in the CMC

[@BIGTHANKSHEESH]

Compared to much of central and south America, Cuba actually got it good due to him

[@andrezits9723]

"Zebus originated from India" "They're mostly just raised for their meat" *"India"* *"Raised for their meat"*

[@sirlionson2207]

Somethings worng I can feel it

[@MattyQube]

Don't worry. Their meat suck. I'd say they are way ahead of cows in living expectations XD

[@vaibhavyadav5462]

Well it's quite complicated. I'll explain everything (obviously I'm Indian) Back then every indian family (which were mostly joint) owned atleast a cow and calf (because it's bad to separate child from mother) to meet their daily needs of milk. They produce enough milk for a family. Indians raised cows for milk not for meat. We used to treat cows like mother and you can't cook your mother. But when Castro though that Indian cows would be suitable he brought them in Cuba. But peope in Cuba don't believed cows as their mother so they eat them. Because these indian cows produce less milk to meet family needs NOT country needs so they should be used in some other way and that was for meat

[@aryyancarman705]

@@vaibhavyadav5462 well the not eating cow thingy started later as Hinduism developed earlier cow meat was100% eaten ,and was also sacrificed in the proto indo European community

[@nimrodbong8173]

@@aryyancarman705 theyre still eaten today

[@tomflanagan551]

Never change, Sam O'Nella. Never change.

[@ditto5631]

5:26 we never heard from that scientist since

[@LE_DHE_D]

Using this as inspiration for a school project rn, thanks Sam!

[@josueh5831]

Fun fact: Fidel Castro died only about 4 months after this video was posted

[@Someone-cd7yi]

@Gangsta Macc he probably drank a milkshake while watching it

[@AudieHolland]

He was only 90 years old.

[@naomimatthiesen8097]

probably died because of this video

[@themostbritishpersonalive868]

@@AudieHolland that's pretty old actually

[@imcloud305]

@@AudieHolland that is more than enough

[@dr.spycrab4089]

Why did we never use this for negotiation? We probably could have annexed Cuba if we promised this dude a lifetime supply of Ben and Jerry's

[@christancoding4424]

Trash Child It's not worth it, he would use up more money to get ice cream than Cuba would generate profit.

[@notpulverman9660]

ChrisTanGaming Dude it would be like a second Florida. It would be entirely worth it. And Cuba is the richest

[@monet5889]

we dont need more florida man

[@grizzlyowlbear3538]

USA -Yo, Fidel, wanna make your country part of us? Fidel -Hell no! I'll never collaborate with you, imperialist, capitalist pigs! USA -You'll live in Wisconsin Fidel -Deal

[@leggozombieslayin]

fuck the us

[@chaoticklutz3633]

Fun Fact: The US had many assassination attempts on Castro but one was close to succession and it was a poisoned milkshake. Castro was thirsty one day while on patrol and the parlor that was supposed to poison the milkshake ended up pussying out at the last second. Castro got to gulp frozen cow juice for another day.

[@leggozombieslayin]

Bay of Pigs invasion is one of my favorite stories of US shenanigans and failures. Unfortunately, a lot of their other shenanigans resulted in successful assassinations of democratically-elected leaders and the establishment of oppressive, violent governments in favor of the US which accounts in large part for the impoverished and divided state of Latin America today.

[@howardbaxter2514]

Well, they didn’t pussy out. The pill broke after they put it in the freezer.

[@Blue_Cinema]

Not a Sage can u link me to an article or video that talks about this?

[@Bernard-ue9pn]

Moo juice

[@FlailSnail222]

I love how Sam is secretly a game grumps fan.

[@littleblueclovers]

Am I the only one getting excited over the Ross/Game Grump reference? He's my favorite Grump, yo.

[@starstruckmetal1225]

Nah man, I was happy to hear Ross too

[@alialeaves9458]

Same here. Ross is really amazing. :D

[@jamaigar]

the reference was super on point :D

[@klungusxyz]

come at me scrublord, I'm ripped

[@prazedplatoon6502]

Love ross but Danny is the man

[@alduiner4850]

I clicked this video because I’m from a small farm town in Minnesota. A family that we’re friends with are very successful dairy farmers. In the early 2000s, Cuba and the US government had a program where they sent farmers to Cuba to help with their dairy industry. Needless to say, Castro loved them. One of the sons even has a picture with him on Castro’s lap. I believe the relations between Cuba and the US fizzled out because of milk.

[@kanati1133]

That's pretty cool

[@mattf5855]

Wisconsinites: Finally a worthy opponent. Our battle will be legendary!

[@DjFexFL]

Legen-dairy, bro. You were on the verge of greatness, this close

[@SvenDzahov]

As a wisconsinite I now welcome Castro with accepting arms. We shall turn Wisconsin into a communist dairy producing haven

[@mauer594]

@@SvenDzahov pretty based

[@jacco4418]

Dutch people: how dare you opose me mortal

[@oranjpeelz6918]

the amount of dairy puns in this video genuinely brings a tear to my eye

[@murderousintent7838]

"I wish I bled milk" was Castro's level Im dead

[@raaston9761]

and mine too

[@yellowblue_tt]

I wish I was milk

[@Lex60]

A journalist went to interview him like two years after is death. Returned so angry cause he tried to obtain serious answers, but Castro always changed the subject just to talk about the properties of soy milk. I think he ended lactose intolerant at old age.

[@arvidbergman]

I'd imagine he'd get bad answers, you can't interview someone that died two years before the interview.

[@jessicacombs8745]

You mean before?

[@PiousMoltar]

Zombie Castro is notoriously difficult to interview.

[@chancelloryusuf]

@@arvidbergman didn1 expect to find you here

[@arvidbergman]

@@chancelloryusuf drat, make for the escape plan

[@leanetgutierrez838]

Fun fact, Copelia is really expensive for the common Cuban and going there when I was little was the equivalent of going to a top restaurant in the U.S . My dad was a chemist for Copelia and I remember that for my fifth birthday he stole two strawberry ice cream pints. Suck it Castor.

[@peganin442]

Im using you as an information source on my school project

[@aidanstone2447]

If reddit existed back then castro would be on r/madlads

[@aidanstone2447]

But was r/madlads

[@azelfdaboi5265]

r/Milklads

[@julianbelza797]

r/NeverBrokeaBone

[@russelljohnson2632]

R/milkman

[@fastyrunbus9443]

if reddit didnt exist the world would be better

[@MYG]

DAIRY DICTATOR!!!

[@robotichamster5260]

Hairy dictator

[@nedarezaie7612]

Hairy dairy dictator

[@savedburrito5654]

Bronze *WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH*

[@spaceguy6863]

911 Likes....

[@y7va]

1,000th like

[@kirsten3214]

0:50 missed opportunity to say "preoccupation with lactation"

[@patapax7033]

"you can juice these guys for days, they are *udderly* superior" I really appreciate the pun.