The Truth About Urethroplasty & How I Got Through It

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

***OUT NOW*** Buy my phalloplasty memoir, 'Top to Bottom' finlaygames.com/my-books/ To see an exclusive video of me reading an extract sign up for my newsletter! eepurl.com/dM7Zw2

[@kellyedey8573]

You come across as there is not too many problem and it worked out very well for you and it will work out fine for everybody that you tell young people will think, you know, but this operation is incredibly dangerous and the satisfactory level is incredibly low. I do not understand, trans, people who advertise being trans, you are just a professional, trans person. I make operation at 21 in 1990, and lived a stealth life, all you are doing is undoing all the hard work we done in living invisibly in my chosen gender , as soon as people know, they will not see you as a genuine man for me as a genuine woman, obviously you can live like that, but I can’t. English is not my first language.

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

@@kellyedey8573 I give a very balanced honest view of phalloplasty, I do not paint a picture of it being easy at all..I have shared my own complications, and stressed that people must go into this with the knowledge that, with the surgery being so incredibly complex, there are likely to be complications along the way. We have to have a realistic view and manage our expectations, and that's the message I share, which you would know if you watched my videos and looked at my website. As for being out and visible as trans, if LGBT folks stayed hidden we would never have made any progress with our rights and acceptance in society.

[@TransKameron]

I'm having my "wee pipe" lengthened next month! I'm so excited you made this video before my next surgery. Thanks Finn! :)

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

My absolute pleasure my friend! Wishing you the very best of luck with your surgery, do feel free to message me any time!

[@rosediamond39]

Jesus Christ. What a world this is. A wee pipe lengthened. What the fuck is going on with human beings why can't we just be grateful for the sacred bodies we have been given.

[@jamesbuttery3862]

​@@rosediamond39 because how would you like it if your couldn't wee without a damn catheter up your wee wee??

[@Moosh207]

This is a really honest, informative and resourceful vlog. So detailed and thorough. You've really got so much mental strength and wisdom to get through your ups and downs of this phalloplasty journey FinnFinn. No one should have to go through such a feeling of disconnection from one's Self, sadness, depression and waiting for so long. You found ways to navigate through that dark place and connected to your light again. So proud of you. I remember the vlog when you 'set up camp' in 'dysphoria forest'. It wasn't an easy time, even though the finnfam put up fairy lights around your camp site to cosy it up. Your face was reliving it slightly as you were reflecting on the experience. Such a difficult and painful experience you had to process and heal from has contributed to your character, and given you the wisdom to forward on to others. So glad your body brings you peace now and reflects who you are on the inside.

[@gailannkimbrough]

Always gracious even with a delicate subject ⚘

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

That's such a lovely thing to say! Thank you!

[@mauriziavilla3958]

My dear Finn this video is so honest and realistic. I’ve followed all your videos through every painful steps to be the man that finally you are. Hopes, pain, power, a very long and complicared process! But you’ve always been positive in every bad situation. This is admirAble and an example for the others. 👍😘

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

Thank you so much for that lovely comment! Much love to you!

[@tfs4156]

I’m 17, almost 3 months on testosterone, and soon getting my first top surgery consultation. I’m so excited for the future. I’m falling down a rabbit hole of looking at bottom surgery videos, this is by far the most useful one. All other bottom surgery videos have just been about all their positive experiences. Knowing about the complications I could get with both surgery’s is helping a lot for deciding what I’ll hopefully get years down the road. Thank you so much for these videos.

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

Hello my friend! Congrats on 3 months on T! Awesome you are soon to have your top consult too, exciting times! Im very glad you are finding my videos helpful, lower surgery is a tricky thing to work through so I am glad to be able to help with the content I make. If you have any questions do feel free to message me over on my website finlaygames.com/welcome/

[@chocolantrosa]

Hope you don’t mutilate your body so young.

[@kellyedey8573]

ATF’s, darling you are watching too young to be having to surgery. There is absolutely no rush, this is sent with love not hate I’m a postop transsexual woman who had my operation at 21 years old in 1990.

[@tfs4156]

@@kellyedey8573 nope I was absolutely not to young to have top surgery. I got it done at 17 and will be 20 this year with 0 regrets and I’m still working on the logistics around bottom surgery. Everyone’s journey is different and you don’t know me so you have no right to speak on if I’m ready or not 🤷‍♂️ without my top surgery I’d be dead

[@kellyedey8573]

No darling, you would not be dead if you waited a little while. There is no reason to come across so aggressively, although we are aware of the behaviour of certain trams???, people of late. It is highly questionable The percentages are people coming out as trans in the last five years roughly, and I feel people are not prepared for a stealth life , unless people want to live as transgender now and not as your chosen gender without people knowing like myself, that was the whole point of it.

[@MeekoEv]

Finn you’re so so right about all of this. I’m asked often an can’t explain it in words. Thank you so much for doing this video an helping me with words to say! I have been feeling you for years 🤙🏾

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

Bless you my dear friend, thank you for the appreciating and the kind words, I am very glad to help!

[@kendallfinch3838]

Thank you so much for sharing this! I have found it really difficult to find information on what the healing process is really like and this has been so helpful. I think many people are reluctant to share the difficulties that come with gender affirmation surgeries. You look so happy and I'm happy for you 💓

[@SegeshiOttawa]

I recommend adding this to the "Phalloplasty Skin Graft Healing" playlist! It really works with that topic and I feel it would help tons of people as well. Also, thank you for these videos, they really help with my decision and give me much more information for my research. Keep doing what you do.

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

Thank you so much my dear friend, Im so very glad that my videos help, are you also aware that I have written a book about my phallplasty journey? You can find more info here: finlaygames.com/my-books/ And you are right about this video fitting with that playlist, I shall add it, thank you!

[@MrPoeticEssence]

learning how to manage expectations when it comes to this surgery is very good advice. anytime someone ask me about this process the first thing i tell them is to manage their expectations about this surgery. know that some form of complication is going to happened, be it big or small. if you keep that in mind, you'll be ready and prepared for if and when it does.

[@jailawrence7237]

Tried signing up for your newsletter but the month/day box wasn't working :( You're brave my brother, I don't think I could go through all those surgeries.i so appreciate your vids all these years. Much love.

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

Thanks for letting me know! I think I have fixed it now, Ive removed that box, it was an experiment which failed! Thank you so much for your appreciation!

[@Grambi568]

Very informative, and helpful video! Thank you for sharing. : ) You are an amazing inspiration!

[@ncburton1713]

The potential complication with urethral lengthening is why the surgeon I saw strongly suggested that I shouldn't have the urethral lengthening and have what is called a shaft only phalloplasty. He said because I'm diabetic I have a greater chance of having complications with the lengthening. It's a good thing that the weight and feel of the penis as well as the ability to have penitrative sex is the most important things for me. It would have been awesome to have the ability to stand to pee too, but the surgery is complicated enough without adding extra risk of complication. We'll see though. Before lower surgery I have to lose at least 80 pounds. I currently have a consultation for weight loss surgery. It's something I've thought about for years and I finally decided to pursue it. One of the benefits is there is a stronge possibility that my diabetes could go into remission. So, we'll see, by the time I see the surgeon for phalloplasty again maybe he'll feel I'll be less likely to have complications with urethral lengthening. That's at least two years in the future through, so nearly impossible to predict. It takes anywhere from 4 months to a year to be green lighted for the weight loss surgery. Mostly because you generally have to have a certain amount of visits with a nutritionish and sometimes a counsilor too. Then after surgery it's the first year that you lose the most significant amount of weight. So it'll be about a year and a half to two years before I can even consider having a second consultation with the surgeon for phalloplasty. Thankfully my dysphoria conserning that part of my body isn't as severe as it was with my chest. It probably helps that for a while I had to come to terms with the idea that I may not be able to have lower surgery because of my many medical issues. Thankfully that's not the case, but it was a real consern for a while. Mentally readying myself for that possibility I think has helped with the reality of how long it will be before I can have another consultation for pballoplasty. Maybe by the time it happens there will be Ne and improved techniques that I will benefit from. Maybe that's why things have happened the way thay have, I'm meant to have something better than what's possible now. We'll see I suppose.

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

Bless you my friend, its a mountain to climb for sure, but all mountains are possible with just one step at a time. If I can very help, please do message me

[@ncburton1713]

@@FinnTheInfinncible Definitely! :) I'm trying to just take it all as it comes and, focus on, the step I'm on now. I can't weight for my consult with the bariatric surgeon I about 2 weeks. At that appointment I'll find out exactly what my requirements for surgery will be. I'm excited to learn what the game plan will be. I've been morbidly obese for most of my life. I started packing on the pounds when puberty set in. Apparently part of that was due to early on-set poly cystic overian syndrome. It also made it extremely difficult to lose weight once I put it on. I'd tried many different diets and habits to try and she'd the pounds. It helped when I had my hysterectomy and a bit more after top surgery, but still I don't lose weight easily. It doesn't help that my chronic pain limits how much exercise I can do. I'm so glad I have this opportunity to finally get down to a healthier weight. On the application for surgery one of the questions was what you wanted from surgery, basically why do you want it. I was completely honest and said that firstly I want a better quality of life and two I want to lose enough weight to continue the medical part of my transition. My consultation with tbe bariatric surveon is on July 3.I'm glad I won't have to wait too long to find out what they'll require before I get a surgery date.

[@nature_greencool8017]

Ok. I spotted a Salt Lamp. " Finn for President " 😆 ❤

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

LMAO! Yes, I have 2 of them I love them! Although I need a new bulb!

[@jesuitvampirewhoreoncrack7539]

Lol so gross

[@thomas-jay5790]

Very informative, thank you and I'm glad your happy now :)

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

Bless you my friend, thank you!

[@DRockTransMan]

Managing expectations...such good good advice, in transition and life I suppose.

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

Absolutely it is, and a skill vital for a fulfilling transition I feel!

[@kellyreilly-robinson2130]

Your perseverance seems to have paid off Finn😊 I remember how hard it was for you and sharing your journey I’m sure is helping many people. As far as leaking I’m a 46 yr old woman and just coughing or laughing causes a bit of leaking😂😂 Age darling😘. Love you darling♥️♥️ Love to Fur-Fur

[@liam51]

i had UL aswell, first off there were 3 fistula, 2 strictures and because of those i almost lost my phallus ( it was barely attached ). so i decided to just get a reroute to my natal urethra.

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

Its unfortunately so common. Thank goodness you didnt loose your boy! Will you try again or are you happy with how things are?

[@liam51]

FinnTheInfinncible currently i'm leaving it as it is, and going ahead with stage 2. maybe i'll try it again in the future :) as of rn i'm happy that i can at least pee & don't have to have the SP.

[@j.j.l.]

So very helpful. Thank you!

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

Im very glad, thank you for letting me know!

[@EdinburghMayhem]

Can't they use a vein instead of a piece of skin? Seems like if it's to be wet all the time, then using something that's designed to be internally wet all the time would be better?

[@ano2023_anoniem]

Thank you for making informative videos about phalloplasty. I am looking for phalloplasty in the futur. The expericienses from another helps a lot to get information and to see that the life quality improves that gives hope for the future. You said that standing to pee was the main cause of dysforia that is for my also. Today, I was at a presentation about lower surgery. It was confronting to hear again about the risks. It is good that they say it but then I think is that the end or can it be solved. They also say that it can be that the urethral cannot be saved. That makes me a bit anxious because that is the most important thing. It is also difficult to choose which donorsite i wanna get it from.

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

You are right, it is wise to know the possible issues. At the end of the day though, for me, even knowing what the worst could happen, l had to try. Dysphoria is awful to live with and so it almost felt like not a choice!

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

And yes, choosing is not easy as each donor site method comes with both gains and losses. It seemed to me, that the most sensation was retained with forearm, which is why l chose that

[@ano2023_anoniem]

@@FinnTheInfinncibletoday, I was with a friend ( transman) and that is exactly what I said. ' I think that I gonna regret it if I do not go for phalloplasty when I am old'. That is the way I think it about at the moment.

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

Thats exactly how I was. In fact, when I was deciding on phalloplasty, I was doing some drama therapy. We did a little excercise where I spoke to my older self and thats what got me to realize that I could live with complications, but I could not live my life without at least trying to get a functioning Finn jr!

[@ormurgujonsson8463]

I’ve never had an issue with the parts I have down there, and since starting hormones I’ve come to love the little micropenis that has started to grow. My biggest (literally) issue is my chest, since I have 38FF breasts. Binding does not and can not flatten me, it genuinely makes me upset every single day, and since I’m overweight, and have always been due to PCOS and how it affects my body, my plastic surgeon refuses to operate until I am 30 kilograms lighter. Been on a strict diet for 6 months with very little change, and I’m just exhausted. It feels like I’ll always have these bloody things. It feels hopeless.

[@elliotlukechoma5816]

Ormur Guðjónsson discuss going on metaformin with your dr. It’s common practice for it to prescribed it here (nhs) as it reduces insulin resistance (basically what PCOS causes). Other than that look at insulin resistant diets and learn about glycemic index and loads. Losing weight with PCOS is possible it’s just got to be done differently to most people.

[@jesuitvampirewhoreoncrack7539]

Hrt doesn't make a penis grow...

[@BranMuffin365]

Wonder why they dont use a skin graft from inside the mouth for the urethra tube.

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

They do with metoidioplasty,, but with phallic there is a lot of urethra to re route so they need a bigger portion of skin yiu see.

[@xxFragileBirdxx]

I mean cis guys drip on occasion too, that's why cis guys shake sometimes (as per my husbands wording lol)

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

Exactly!

[@kimlaurafowler2066]

Hi Finn. Can I buy that powder in a chemist?

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

Hiya! Yes I would think so, or a health food shop. Do make sure to get the powder, not the capsules.

[@iftikharahmed4158]

Which country are you from? and do you need to go to a plastic surgeon for urethroplasty?

[@MeekoEv]

Anytime brother

[@pmbluemoon]

*trigger warning for anyone reading my comment* Ok, I don't want to disclose too much about my anatomy, but there is the whole "rabbit hole" that I'm going to jump down!! OK... there's the "labia minora" that has lots of excess skin, which (in my case) is in abundance. Is there a way I could use that excess skin to use to lengthen my urethra, while also using my excess abdominal skin as part of the phallo? (instead of my arm or other visible body part) Just a question to float around out there for any doctor willing to answer my question of you're reading my comment :) I have LOTS of extra tissues all over to work with! I would be interested to know if getting a labiaplasty, tummy tuck and phalloplasty could be done with all of my "skin folds" after losing weight! Would be an interesting challenge for sure! :D I'm sorry if I grossed anyone out, or offended anyone with my comment! I also can't get any implants due to my body's rejection of anything not body related (implants of any kind) I found this out after a surgeon left a clamp in me after a surgery, it was NOT FUN, took about 5 years for them to finally take it out (another doctor did actually take it out other than the one who put it in in the first place.) And I'm VERY sensitive and allergic to a LOT of things, was debating on clitoral lengthening to stretch the erectile tissues to be able to have a mini penis "Not all men are created equal" ;) ) There's so many extra toys and such available, that I'm not too concerned, so far I just have not done any lower surgery, but checking out my options vs what tissues I have extra that I could possibly use :) My dad (cis male) also found out if he takes Benedryl or anything with diphenhydramine HCL in it *READ YOUR MEDICATION INGREDIENT LABELS!!!* , it can lead to urinary retention, and it also happens to me as well, I found out I need to give an "extra push" to get all the wee out if I'm on this antihistamine. I've not had ANY lower surgery besides hysto and oophorectomy/hernia surgery) Thank you so much for your candor and explanations about phallo, you're so awesome, and I appreciate you so much, and just your attitude and personality in general! "FINN FOR PRESIDENT" :D

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

Thank you my friend, l appreciate your appreciation so much! I love finding your comments! As for your questions, there are many options available, there is abdominal phallo which uses skin on the tummy, so that might work. An appointment to discuss this with a surgeon should help to make things clearer. Thanks for that tip re antihistamine too! Much love to you

[@pmbluemoon]

@@FinnTheInfinncible Much love to you as well, and thank you for being here, sharing and making videos

[@AB-jn4bi]

Does anyone know of any procedure or maybe not procedure but ways of mitigating urethral complications? I know it's a huge complication rate - in Canada through the Montreal Clinic it is nearly 30% risk rate but this is one of the scariest things of phalloplasty (urinary complications) for me. I read something a couple months ago about procedural ways of avoiding complications or at least mitigating a full 30% rate of complication but I cannot find it any more.

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

Unfortunately I dont know of any my friend

[@AB-jn4bi]

@@FinnTheInfinncible that's fine, thought I'd ask. You're doing a great service to the trans community even if we just base that on your fantastically positive attitude! Thanks for everything you do!

[@notmisael9367]

I just had this surgery i’m on day 10. But I just had a situation alot of blood leaked out from my penis whole, it wasn’t painful at all but should I be worried ? Is it normal. The first few days a bled a little as I was told but just today i woke up from a nap and there was alot of blood even gushes of blood

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

Hi my friend. I am really sorry, I missed your message. How is the healing going?

[@notmisael9367]

@@FinnTheInfinncible i’ve been healing good! But it does feel a lil tender and lil sensitive in the area not sure how long it’ll be like that.

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

@@notmisael9367 glad you are healing well. Yes, I was tender for a good few months. Take it easy! If l can ever help, or you want more phallo info, you can find me over on my website finlaygames.com

[@chocolantrosa]

I am giving you a thumbs up tho

[@alidaud258]

Does it hurt? so can you urinate without pain etc?

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

It did at the time. Most surgery is unfortunately painful but now it's completely fine, pain free and works well!

[@alidaud258]

@@FinnTheInfinncible So being intimate is no pain too? and when you urinate is there any leakage still or is it less now as time goes on. Im a guy suffering from meatal, navicular fossa stricture, my stream is okay up to the tip of the penis where its like 25% of the diameter of what it should be. It happened due to a injury with jean zip in which I had to use some steroid cream and eventually I didnt realise but the cream gave me a burn in my urethra and damaged the lining and now my urethra opening is narrower and now 25% of its normal thickness.

[@tinahickman6300]

I checked out a website called gurecon.com and it shows different images of postop metoidioplasty phalloplasty & glansplasty. After listening to what you talked about with your experiences I wanted to see what the major differences were between these procedures. It's amazing what these surgeons can do!! I'm glad to see that you have gotten to where you want to be and think it's wonderful that you are trying to help other people get through this to let them know that they're not alone!!!

[@BranMuffin365]

My cis partner has to "milk" so he doesnt drip too 🤷🏼‍♀️

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

Ah well there you go!

[@aresynshaw355]

@@FinnTheInfinncible Hi Finn, is there any way I can contact you to have a chat?

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

@@aresynshaw355 hi my friend. Feel free to email me using the contact me option on my website finlaygames.com

[@rosediamond39]

Don't get surgery your body is perfect it's your mind that needs help

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

Nothing wrong with my mind thank you. And yes my body is perfect.

[@kellyedey8573]

It is not a chance you’re going to have issues down the line it is a guarantee, i’m sure you are fully aware but the bottom surgery for trans-man is wholly inadequate.

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

I love how people think they can speak for my own body experience! It's far from inadequate, I'm incredibly pleased with my surgery results and it's vastly improved the quality of my life in all manner of ways.

[@chocolantrosa]

I Watch these videos out of cringe, nothing else

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

I hope you learn something on the way!