First Time Hearing The Drug In Me Is Reimagined by Falling In Reverse | Suicide Survivor Reacts

[@MentalAmanda]

💖Keep the mental health conversation going by sharing your story here in the comments. No matter where you are in your journey, you have a safe place here to share your struggles and accomplishments without judgment. This is how we shatter the mental health stigma.💖 And if you need some direction and would like me to be your Happiness teacher, you can sign up for my Happiness Boost course here: amandawebsterhealth.com/happiness-boost/

[@robertsmit7840]

Thank you Amanda

[@matthewmunson6098]

💕💕

[@MentalAmanda]

@@russoct27 To me the "point" is leaving the world better than I found it. And just experiencing as much as I can.

[@devinhouse285]

I love Ronnie's lyrics because I can also relate to them so well. Last year I committed suicide, and was able to come back from it. Because of war I suffer from severe PTSD, and on top of that the last 15 years I have been verbally and emotionally abused by my wife not even realizing it was abuse. On top of that I have lost 5 Marine Corps brothers from suicide from June 23 to today. I apologize for this being pretty winded but talking to anyone about this who advocates for mental health is refreshing. Love and mental peace to all of you

[@MentalAmanda]

@@devinhouse285 I am so very glad you made it. I'm sorry that your brothers didn't. I hope you can find ways to hold onto their light and share it with the world. PTSD is a hard battle as is, I can't imagine how difficult it must have been to have your pain compounded by abuse. I hope you are away from that so that you can really begin to heal.

[@lostlothbrok7156]

Ronnie is a amazing artist, extremely versatile. He is also a former addict, did prison time, struggles with mental health issues, is also a suicide survivor. I've followed him since 2004, he's been around for a while

[@itatsuuchiha96]

Im just happy to see that Ronnies in a good place now especially now that he has Paige in his life.

[@manditoon9627]

ETF 🖤

[@kathleenclark815]

@@itatsuuchiha96 Saraya is her name

[@itatsuuchiha96]

@@kathleenclark815 I know.

[@lostlothbrok7156]

@@itatsuuchiha96 amen to that

[@AndieO]

Ronnie speaks of mental health and addiction in many of his songs. The "triology" and Popular Monster are so very impactful.... and his daughter is in many of his videos... cause she's his anchor. Ronnie takes it from soft and peaceful, to screaming like few others... and it all works. *meant to add this. It's ok not to be ok. I had a bunch of losses in a short span of time. And it seemed everytime I was coming out of the dark, something else would drop me back. To give a cliff notes version.. only child with chronic disease that meant spending much of my life in hospitals. 2013... lost my dad (I was a daddy's girl), 2015.. my mom passed. Lost four of my extended family between 15 &18. 2019 had to have my therapy dog put dog because of cancer. 2020... my husband of 17 years died. There are days all I can do is cry. Then something will make me laugh. Joke that I can go from 0 to Bitch in 2.3 seconds. If you need to scream..scream, if you need to cry..cry. if you need to laugh.. do it. Hugs.

[@MentalAmanda]

You have lost so much and I am very proud of you for being able to cycle through those VERY difficult emotions and still be here building me up. I had a lot of loss in a short span too and it was crippling.

[@bazkeen]

Just loved your take on this incredible song. Now you have to do I'm Not A Vampire Revamped and Popular Monster. Would love to hear your opinion on those. Great insight

[@jovanm7009]

I've listened to this song so many times and it's not an easy song to listen but what affects me the most is that final scream. It always gets me because I always remember those times when I wanted to scream "can't you see?" when some people who were very important to me didn't see how bad I felt in that moment

[@wesdean9128]

This version of the song is so freakin' beautiful, and hits hard for anyone who's ever been lost in depression, addiction, etc. Great heartfelt reaction!

[@charlieknowles4126]

I feel like Ronnie knew very well that the scream at the end was a perfect representation of the feeling on the inside while the rest of the song represents what's showing to the rest of the world.

[@scifimonkey3]

Amanda you are most certainly meant to be here. I am sure that what you are doing is not only therapy for you but most critical for many others. Keep it up!

[@thatcdnmagik4857]

I’ve watched a few of your videos, and I have to say with your journey its been a ride so far seeing it. And with that being said overall you generally seem like a sweetheart and forever grateful to come across your videos!

[@shad3demon189]

One of the most genuine reactions I have seen. Love to see the sincerity!

[@GreathSentina]

Amanda, you're an inspiration. after watching several of your vids, I know why every relationship I get inti implodes. It's because I've not forgiven myself for trying to take my own life. So thank you for the insight.

[@MentalAmanda]

When we know better, we do better and depression loves to keep us ignorant. I am humbled to have helped you take that first step toward forgiveness and healing. Much love and I'm proud of you!

[@drewciferf3293]

Thanks for being so open about yourself. I find your story inspiring, and I hope that you know a lot of people can relate to you. Keep up the great content and always take care of yourself. 🙂

[@taylormedeiros1946]

You are so sweet! I loved your reaction to this band, they are amazing. I really appreciate your input and overall reaction :) also your channel and what you’re doing on here is incredible. I hope you realize and are told how important it is, what you’re doing. Thank you! :)

[@Ronocos]

I'm very happy to hear that you seem to be doing better and trying to move on from your pain. I myself have suffered with depression and anxiety for longer than I can remember and I know all too well that feeling of living in the fight or flight state, it almost feels like that is when you feel most alive. Stay strong, keep doing you and take care of yourself

[@matthewmunson6098]

Again Amanda thank you so much for your channel and this like I said previously I am struggling because I'm dying from stage 4 cancer I do have depression anxiety PTSD and you make my life a lot brighter just listening and hearing you speak about the struggles and what it's like is tremendously helping me and is most definitely helping me not to try something stupid yes I'm going to die maybe in 6 months maybe a year but thank you so much I love your channel love you girl keep going

[@jasonfisher8529]

Yeah, you're going to love "Popular Monster". So tough, so good.

[@bradleyseaman460]

I just found your channel and immediately subscribed during your reaction. I love how you paused the song and told your story. I have been battling depression for a long time and I have kept to myself because no one has ever heard me. I have been in a dark place for quite a while and it's becoming more and more comfortable every day. I am at a point where I don't talk to people because people don't listen to me, I have a major dislike for people so I stay to myself and to my thoughts in my dark place. This is hard, this is the first time in a year that I have made contact with another human being and just getting some things off my chest, feels like some weight has been lifted off my shoulders so thank you for your channel

[@MentalAmanda]

I am a dog sitter outside of this because I have a hard time trusting/liking people as well. I often joke that the thing I like most about people is their dog. But this community.....we will listen to you and love you and hold space for you.

[@unknownunknown-un9xw]

I have just found your channel And I am so grateful for you content. I have friends and family who either have suffered from mental health or are currently suffering from it. And despite how hard I try to be there for them, I struggle to understand the sheer depth of whats going on with them, because all of us have been told "we don't talk about that sort of thing" or "you will get over it". Thank you for opening my eyes....and talking about this stuff. It's important for everyone to know and acknowledge that mental health issues are very real and we need to be more compassionate and understanding. I feel a little more equipped to hopefully help my loved ones...thank you..you are an inspiration.

[@ctobolsk]

Thank you for your honest and emotional reaction. Thank you for being so vulnerable. You might want to listen to the original The Drug in Me is You, which was written 10 years ago. The difference between that song and this reimagining of it are worlds apart, the original song was kind of emo/punk. The lyrics in both are exactly the same, but this reimagined version really lets the lyrics shine. The deep meaning was always there, but the original was such a fun song they weren’t noticed as much. I hope you continue on your Falling in Reverse journey. Popular Monster and I’m Not a Vampire Revamped (also a redone version of a 10 year old song) should definitely be your next stops. I have bipolar disorder and am also a suicide survivor, and I applaud you for working to break the stigma. You have a new sub here!

[@BenDeckard]

I really don't ever leave comments or anything because I just figure they'll get read over anyway. But if you do read this just know that I've listened to this song many times and have seen quite a few reactions to this song but I have never heard it being broke down in such fine and great detail before. I absolutely loved how you were able to explain almost every lyric and describe how it affects you at the same time. You really have a great understanding of lyrics and I absolutely love it. But yeah that's all I wanted to say. I know this reaction is like a year old so you probably won't see it lol. I'm definitely going to find some more of your stuff though. Thank you

[@KrisThroughGlass]

Awesome reaction! Ronnie (the singer), wrote the lyrics 10 years ago, whole he was in prison, becoming clean from heroin and looking at himself in the mirror. He's clean ever since, but still suffers from PTSD, Depression and Anxiety. I don't know what kind of music you usually like, but regarding your mental health focus, I suggest I Don't Mind and Popular Monster from Falling in Reverse, Zzyxx Rd. by Stone Sour and I Can't Sleep by Tom MacDonald. I think you might also like Leave a Light by Madchild and Dear Nova by Nova Rockafeller. Personally I suffer from depression and anxiety for decades. After basically not living for years and month of being suicidal Tom MacDonald convinced me to search for help. Now I'm on meds and recently started therapy. I don't really see a light yet but at least I feel like maybe I started to fight more activly, if that makes any sense. Subbed! Greetings from Germany

[@MentalAmanda]

There's a light, it just might be dim as you come out of the darkness! Proud of you for getting help! Just don't forget that the choices you make as far as lifestyle also affect mental health!

[@Ghostshiva45]

Everyone can stand in the light, it doesn't judge. But there is a special warmth to it, felt by those who have first been through the dark. I love you, too. ❤️🙏

[@dillonhayes3402]

Have heard waaaay too many reactions to all of falling in reverses songs I get stuck in loops for days on end.. usually when I'm starting to feel like I'm not doing too good and it seems to pull me through but I'm yet to hear anyone else truly relate the way so many of us fans do most talk about it from the other side of the glass looking in pretending to understand. I loved your reaction probably my favourite

[@joshturner3655]

Loved the reaction, I could see you was struggling with this, I know you feel I’ve been there myself. You’re an amazing person, your strong and you should be proud of yourself.

[@halosandheroes]

I peek in from time to time, but wanted to update you: 1. Got a vehicle 2. Been spending time with and making my daughter's mental health journey a little easier by sharing mine 3. Started school Thank you for inspiring me, my KZbin videos will be coming soon

[@MentalAmanda]

That's amazing! Very happy for and proud of you and thank you for the updates!

[@JohnFleshman]

As much as I love this version of the song your reaction made me want to reach through the screen and give you the biggest hug my body can generate!

[@distinguishedgoat8773]

I like how you are able to relate to the lyrics and share your story! However, the line is actually 'your secrets keep you sick' not safe. Also a relatable line. Keep up the good work!

[@MentalAmanda]

Did I mix them up? Darn it! But I think it kind of blends. It keeps you safe in your mind while staying sick in your own Hell. It convinces you that you are safe while you're dying.

[@distinguishedgoat8773]

@@MentalAmanda I absolutely agree!

[@shawnroffol2334]

Amanda this song help me get off dope....been sober a year always go back to this song to check me.....keep making the movement

[@MentalAmanda]

Very proud of you!

[@anthonyvalentine9685]

The genuine reaction is much appreciated. The truth will set you free.

[@BeylaKarina]

It is so great to see one like you, that has been through a lot of shit, is working her way through, I myself is strugling with depression and anciety and it is so hard, I hav an idea of what you've been through. Ronnie Radke is absolutely amazing, there is alot from them to dive through. Lots of love from Denmark from the bottom of my heart, my thoughts will be with you. Keep on fighting, we will get through someday. Kisses and hugs

[@ExileOfGods]

Just recently subscribed and I just want to come out and say that I am diagnosed with Chronic Depressive Disorder and Generalized Anxiety Disorder. This song accompanied by you and your life story makes life so much easier to handle. Knowing I’m not alone in the journey of life. While we are born just to die I feel as if you were never born in the first place you wouldn’t have the pain you carry but more importantly; you wouldn’t have the luxury to speak to others about the importance of mental health. Not saying you aren’t appreciative of the life you have but it seems to be the case with me and well anybody in general that in times of hardship and failure we often get lost and don’t look at what we have. Personally, it helps me recenter. Love your videos and your story and how much you’ve accomplished already. Stay strong and it’s ok to not be ok! ❤️

[@MentalAmanda]

This means everything to me ❤️ You are absolutely not alone!

[@davidtanguma6247]

Thank you for your thoughts on the song. All life matters! You are complete, whole and beautiful. 💕

[@brianpigg3119]

New subscriber! Love your reaction and your input. Looking forward to a Falling in Reverse rabbit hole. Ronnie is so talented.

[@donaldchapman4312]

The best thing you can do is share your experiences and help others with your story who may be experiencing these same things. It’s good for others to hear that they are not the only one’s who feel this way. I suffered with depression for about 20 years and had some pretty low points where I felt like I couldn’t go on. About a year and a half after I was sober and seeking treatment things just seemed to click for me and my mental state changed. Not saying everyday is a picnic, but I was better able to cope with problems and hurdles in daily life. I feel much better and I guess I’m fortunate to have done it without the need of medication. I no longer feel the need to just stay in my little box sheltered from the world. It’s a wonderful feeling when you don’t feel like you’re carrying the burden of the world on your shoulders. Hope you are doing and staying well, and good luck with your journey

[@MentalAmanda]

I also had a major shift, took control and can now handle life situations much more gracefully. Usually. Of course there are harder days, that is human. I did it without meds as well. Glad we made it to the other side!

[@donaldchapman4312]

@@MentalAmanda Absolutely, it is definitely a blessing from where we were.

[@shannonshaw9878]

I have had very similar thoughts, the biggest i can think of is, if you change even one person's life by even being there, making them laugh at just the right time that the went go through with something you have thought of, or even if they go on to do or think or help someone else by something you have said, and most times they won't tell you do you just have to make your conversations count, laugh as much as you can and have deep conversations with anyone who will listen. Even this channel can help.

[@BittyMERC]

i love it. i cant tell you how many people have reacted to this song and say something so similar near the end, its such a nice song such a peaceful and calm song ect, then a few seconds later their reaction is very similar to yours. like woah that went from 0 to 100 quickly lol.

[@Dumpweed971]

Hey, Respect dude.I totally get where you’re coming from in terms of not being able to accept help. People are different and friends mean well but we’re not always on the same wavelength and that ok, the thought still counts. It was fun to watch your reaction, I hope you’re doing well. ❤️

[@MartinScheuerJr]

Don’t care what anyone says, you have the most absolutely amazing channel on KZbin. There is no second to what you do. Thank you!

[@inyourbunnyhole6652]

i just want to hug you, i feel these songs the same way!

[@chrisvaughn4399]

Incredible artistry in this one. After watching this one the second time to make the connection that all of the darkness, anguish, guilt, anxiety, regret, addiction, insanity, and instability of the past is represented by the beautiful demon in a pale blue dress. The only hint of color in a gray world. Temptation. And then it all burns.. to be reinvented as a clean slate to rebuild on -- while bringing along the knowledge of knowing what didn't work in the past. So empowering. Insanely creative.

[@nekiritan6779]

Hello Amanda, I really like the honesty and vulnerability of your addiction. In my opinion it's so very important to openly speak about mental illnesses. I've recently started getting to grips again in my life after about 2 years of free falling. One of my favourite songs so far is "Toxic thoughts" by Faith Marie, depicting some of the thoughts I regularly had. I'd be interested to see if you can similarly relate. Either way, I appreciate the effort you're putting into your reactions and trying to share some positivity.

[@owwmygooch]

Just keep going on, its a primal instinct.. Were all in this together 🤘

[@rettr0grad350]

You should check out I'm not a Vampire Revamped Also by Falling in Reverse. Great reaction and thank you for everything you do. Too many people are lost out here in the world. It's good to know they have somewhere free to go. Keep it up! 👍🙂

[@joakimkarlsson2934]

love ya!

[@blackknight1013]

I love poetic moments, and saying about how the music was right before the heavy part had me laughing out loud. I was like, "Oh, you are sooo not ready for the musical slap in the face coming your way." Has a similar style in I'm not a vampire (revamped) though think that song it worked far better in with the lyrical content. Worth watching that video if you haven't, as for me it is up there as music video of the year for last year.

[@IvIidnight]

The point of life is change. That is the only constant in life. How we change ourselves to better deal with a situation, or change the situation to being more favorable. Or both.

[@xSylehn]

One day you'll must let burn your adictions. Dats the message. Now, the Falling in Reverse community will ask you for "I'm not a vampire (revamped)", "Popular Monster" and the Trilogy (in dat order) Losing my Mind, Losing my Life & Drugs. Nice react 👋

[@DarKcurrenT22]

Yes it’s what we all are asking Hahahhaha

[@shadowfox2120]

I always interpreted Falling in Reverse to mean getting back up. Going through his personal life it seems like that is the message. Ronnie is pretty cool guy and he does watch reactions to his songs on his livestreams.

[@MentalAmanda]

Let me know if he ever happens to watch mine!

[@MTrefry2]

I never thought about the name much till recently when I saw loosing my mind when one scene shows a woman dripping black liquid into his mouth which I think is figurative of his black tar heroine addiction and after that he is falling in reverse as a image of getting high

[@mokane86]

Not disagreeing or anything , But "getting back up" is so much more controlled... I see "Falling in Reverse" as out of your hands now but to a better place or in an improved direction. 🤘😁👍

[@kathleenclark815]

It means ACCENTION

[@einarthormodster95]

Thank you foot this channel! I feel safe here, I can talk openly about my self-harm and alcohol abuse. Also, overdose with painkillers 3 times, one whose heart stopped a few seconds. It's important to talk about these things, many of us are stigmatized by this. Thet jus y don't know.

[@ohryan9872]

I had to stop 7 minutes and 10 seconds into your reaction to let you know This is one of the most genuine And emotional reactions I've seen this song so far wonderful job Now that I said that that's continue Great reaction

[@Minextube]

Ronnies songs has acctualy saved my life and re think the hard choise that i wanted to take. Still feel the darker on my shoulder but trying to look forward for my daugther

[@MentalAmanda]

We all feel darkness sometimes. Sometimes more frequently than other times. Keep fighting. You've got this. And we're here for you anytime.

[@jdwildman5931]

Hello Amanda I hope you are all well and your life be blessed. For I believe in you and your great cause for I suffer from depression and God came to my life and I love the lord. Do not give up ever Amanda you have people who love you so be happy.

[@yubogolfer4040]

It's OK to feel your emotions and allow them to have space in your life, you're absolutely right Amanda. Please let me suggest another song for you that has exactly that message: Aurora - The River Just for the background of it, she wrote this song when she realized that over 70% of the worldwide suicides are commited by men ... who are predominantly told to be the 'strong' ones. I think you know how destructive this indoctrination in the upbringing of boys and young men actually is.

[@MentalAmanda]

Oh I very much do. The minute I found out I was having a boy (he's now 10), I told EVERY person in his life that if they ever said ANY variation of "be a man" or "men don't cry" or any of that, they'd get my stiletto to their face.

[@yubogolfer4040]

@@MentalAmanda 👍

[@mokane86]

@@MentalAmanda people are often "toxic" in their interpretation and judgement of others and in this case young men and boys,,, But in my opinion "be a man" doesnt mean dont experience emotion or grow ij your emotion, it means do not allow your emotions to conquer and control you . Do not wallow or live in despair or anger. 🤘 😁👍

[@clqueyoungblood6905]

I know a lot of people already asked, but I would love to see you react to Popular Monster! It is my favorite song by Falling in Reverse and the lyrics are very powerful. Stay strong queen, hope you just get better and better💖

[@richardfisher21081]

Subbed!! Love your channel. Keep up the great work 👍

[@LadyEmilyNyx]

The whole song always makes me cry, because I relate so much to all of it, but it's the ending that really gets me sobbing. Throughout the whole song feels like it's desperately trying to express something, and at the end it feels like a glimpse inside the mind, and everything is on fire, and you're screaming "Cant you see?!" I'm dying, I'm burning... Why can't you see that...but all anyone sees is the pretty piano ballad, and thinks "oh it's not that bad, everyone gets sad". They don't see the burning. The screaming. The REAL depression that only those who've been there will ever understand. My mother always says "You wouldn't be depressed if you didn't listen to depressing music". But listening to songs like this, is the only time I ever feel seen.

[@austinbarkley5871]

i have terrible anxiety from ptsd of an experience in which my friend died and "i died".... i came back, he didnt... im just now realizing im meant to be here... however i assure everyone, there is nothing to fear, its beautiful, its peaceful. my anxiety stems from the fear of the life not lived yet with a respect and understanding for death that it is simply crossing to something else, at least in my experience. dont fear death, fear not living.

[@scottpurcell8833]

your brain sounds exactly like mine. i understand 7 different languages so that gives me lots more material to work with to keep my brain busy or ill go mad. As for mortality. Im now a grandfather and have accepted that my life doesnt concern me. I put my life before my kids and grand kids above anything else and would give my life in a moments notice for them. Before they came along, yes mortality scared me too. I commend you for helping others. Its what i do in my own way too. Helping others helps me with me.

[@DyvmSlorm]

Live life like there is no tomorrow. If, after the end, you discover there IS something else, you'll likely be pleasantly surprised. Live in the moment, enjoy the tastes, smells, and feelings that surround you. Enjoy your friends and be civil to everyone else. That is how I TRY to live my life. Then again, I'm sitting and watching you watch a video. However, I get joy seeing music that has touched me, touch others. It makes one feel less alone.

[@themplar]

Steel Panther - party like there is no tomorrow.

[@stevemack2004]

Its a strange fight that win or lose, some memories stay between other people. And that those memories frighten me

[@CaryHedges]

Thank you for this reaction. "If we are born to die, and we all die to live Then what's the point of living life if it just contradicts?" The entire song is beautiful, but this is the lyric that sticks out to me the most. We all wonder "why?" I have found the answer by surrounding myself with people I love, who I know will love me back.

[@MentalAmanda]

That is so important. I am proud of you.

[@NOSpwered]

You just nailed it on the head, that is why I love this video, don't know if anyone else has noticed but Ronnie is a Vamp in this video

[@franciscogomez465]

I struggled with depression and suicide from ages 12-18. For one year I was on top of the world and care free. Than my friends starting leaving and dying. I was in a lot of toxic relationships where I got burned really bad and I struggled with alcohol for awhile and became homeless for a bit. I pushed my feelings deep down around that time and it eventually turned into a lot of anxiety and stress. Every day people ask me how I’m doing and I always say “I’m not doing great but I’ll be okay” because I went through hell before and I don’t think this is too big to overcome. It still hurts though. I’m lonely.

[@MentalAmanda]

I hope you can find some connection here. Feel free to message me anytime. I'm proud of you for fighting and you're never alone!

[@devinhouse285]

One thing you misheard and a few reactors have as well is "Your secrets keep you sick". You know meaning the more you keep bottle up your emotion the stronger the poison becomes and keeps you sick. Loved the reaction

[@bst.1502]

Your thought process on mortality reminded me of a movie that might shift your perspective. The movie is the fault in our stars if you wanna give that a watch. I am new to your channel and already love it! 💜💜

[@MentalAmanda]

I just read that book earlier this year!

[@melissask8784]

As a borderliner Person this kind of songs hit me really hard. And im thankful im not alone feeling things like this

[@Jason-yt9fl]

I know this is a very old video and I feel weird commenting on it. Your reaction and commentary was amazing. I just want to say that most men (in a particular generation) who are hurt or feel not a part of the world will struggle with their purpose of self. With that said we were expected to push past our internal feeling, and for a lack of better words "suck it up". And I hate it. Ronnie at the end when everything with him burns is how a lot of feels. It Leaves a destroyed piece of our soul behind so we can move on. But scares will never go away. I Love your content 😊

[@annkennedy1672]

You are beautiful and wonderful and sensibly sensitive ❤️❤️❤️ 🥰🥰🥰you get this so well 😊 subbed!!!!

[@Jumpermon]

This song encapsulates the despair that, for those that have contemplated suicide, is all too familiar. Hard, but necessary, to listen to this song. There are hands to grasp...reach out.

[@wendigodestroyer665]

I love this version of the song it's so beautiful.

[@joeyx2savage110]

I love when he remakes his songs! Im gonna search, id like to see your reaction on the normal "the drug in me is you" reaction. Same with both im not a vampire. It just feels different with each! The way you deliver a message really matters. I feel these songs are proof. Take "last resort" for example. Listen to papa roach version then falling in reverse version. Same meaning but expressed differently. Papa roach felt angry. Falling in reverse felt sad. Same with "drug in me is you" except other version wasnt angry. Idk. Ronnie is incredible

[@SparkimusPrime]

What everyone else said about FiR. They’re consistently amazing. And now I’m going to watch some of your other videos as it seems like we might be dealing with similar stuff. My kid is 12 and we’re really going through it. How am I supposed to fix them when I’m broken too? I know “fix” isn’t the right term, but you know what I mean. Everything has just been a lot. Best way I can describe it. Thanks for this 🖤

[@MentalAmanda]

I know exactly what you mean. This VLOG I made about our mental health might resonate with you: kzbin.info/www/bejne/r3-8haFrjc-ghLM

[@SparkimusPrime]

@@MentalAmanda Thank you 🖤

[@stevefortner6413]

Because of your relating to this song, you must do Popular Monster. Ronnie watches these reactions on Twitch, I’ll suggest this one to him in his chat. Good work!

[@MentalAmanda]

Thank you so much! Grab a screen cap for me if he actually watches my reaction!

[@MTrefry2]

Ronnie really goes into it with the trilogy that he did. Its Loosing my mind, loosing my life, and Drugs. He talks alot about his mental health, drug addiction and the need to change and how he needed to kill the old him. Its rough emotionally, but really well done.

[@michaelaboheim4929]

thx for the reaction video. (please don't jugde my english - it is not my mother tongue) this one is a song that means very much to me at the moment and it is mainly because of (the kind of) powerfull ending. i wish i could cry out all the misery as he says that i am feeling right inside me, emotions i can not even tell most of the people around me. i know it's a kind of "displacement activity" that it can make people laugh because of the suprise ending, but it is a little stab in my heart when people do so (yes, not the first time, i got this reaction). but overall i am glad that i watched the video, mainly because of the part when you are talking about the fear of death and/or mortality. this is an issue for me since i was a child in the age of about 5-7 years and it became more and more intense over the years. it is not only the idea of my consciousness is going to end and there is no meaning to the things i do in life when in the end i am losing it all and i am wiped away. the dominating feeling is the loss of everyone concentrated in one single point which can happen at any time of my life, because there is no guaranty and every fucking day could be my last. and so far no one seemed to feel (kind of) the same way about it - so thank you very much for this. at the moment this fear often terrorizes me so much, i feel like it's "melting down my brain". at last i want to say, that even in times, when i feel so lost, so despaired and so helpless suicide is not an option for me, because my fear of death, of losing everything and everyone is my personal idea of hell. and in my reality, as long as i can breath i potentially can overcome bad things that happen, but there is no chance coming back from death. - i know that many people may feel completely different about this - so no offence! this feeling about death is kind of both for me: a blessing and a curse.

[@Aldy8]

I strongly recommend you react to bring me the horizon - “don’t go”. Very emotional song and you can just feel the pain in the vocalist

[@tristantknight]

I've had same thoughts about why we are here. it wasn't until after my awakening that brought clarity along with it and some reading about spirituality that we are all just energy here in a physical realm to learn. to learn what still kind of puzzles me. but I believe this learning can be accomplished through anything we experience such as joy, love and sadness. you won't cease to exist at death. your energy is eternal and will continue on even after your physical death. and it's possible at some point you may reincarnate in the future to learn something different. it might sound like a bunch of nonsense, but with my clarity, I can assure you it makes sense. before my awakening I was similar to you, in that I was weighed down by depression and my demons. all that is mostly gone now. I still have one demon I can't shake. I don't know if you have reacted to other Falling In Reverse songs, if you haven't, I certainly hope you do. Ronnie is an amazing artist and Falling In Reverse is one of my favorite bands, right up there with Slipknot and Jinjer. hope life is treating you well, Amanda! 😊

[@Red_Ring_Of_Death]

I feel you a little bit. The difference for me is if anything ever good happens in my life I get anxiety and I inevitably sabotage it. I'm still waiting for me to be okay and something that resembles normal.

[@MentalAmanda]

I have a habit of self sabotage too! The good thing is that being aware of it allows you to see when you're doing it and act opposite of what you're default is.

[@Red_Ring_Of_Death]

@@MentalAmanda Thanks for being there for all of us in your community Amanda. I don’t think you realize how many people you help.

[@silentbb8679]

this video helped me, even if just for a moment. thank you.

[@MentalAmanda]

*hug* Message anytime.

[@IvanTKlasnic]

You should Check out The Amity Affliction, They Talk a lot about Addiction and Mental Health. They had 4 no 1 records in Australia (where they are from) and two other top 10 records since 2010. I'd recommend the Songs "All Fucked Up", "I Bring The Weather With Me" and "This Could Be Heartbreak" since their videos belong together in that order. Other notable songs would be "Open Letter", "Drag The Lake" and "Don't Lean On Me"

[@minilabyrinth]

I think the name falling in reverse means how vampires rise out of coffins with their arms over their chest, like a reverse fall upwards

[@edwardfordyce6174]

I've gotten past the addiction but the feelings of worthlessness and loneliness have yet to go away.

[@MentalAmanda]

First of all, congratulations in overcoming the addiction. That's no small feat and I'm so proud of you! It's often portrayed to us that kicking addiction will make everything better, but it's only the first step. We fell into it for a reason - often to avoid uncomfortable feelings such as worthlessness and loneliness. The next step is addressing and combatting those feelings, which often involves outside support from a professional, a support group of others who have been there and building a strong circle. You've already come so far, keep fighting!

[@paintedhorse6880]

This is actually a remastered version of the original he wrote while in prison. It was alot faster and heavier and angrier but recently hes been remastering his older songs a bit.

[@deejayturtle]

#AmandaWebster... I have not shed tears to this video since the first time I watched it... Till now. I WISH i COULD GIVE YOU A REALLY BIG SAFE GENJTLE HUG. Thank you so much for sharing as much as you did in this reaction. It was nostalgic seeing someone shiver from the lyrics to parts of this song. Incest. mental, physical, and verbal survivor of child abuse. Anxiety and depression still plague me to the point I am disabled. Toxic relationships right and left. And then a 4 yr addiction to a street drug called Ice (Think meth but 2 to 4 times stronger). I had a couple times I literally thought I was dyeing. I'm still here, a year and a half clean now as of the 14th of last month. Art is so subjective. To me this song is literally about drug addiction. The woman is the representation of the drug. The third verse is the drug reaching out to him though he is trying SO HARD to let it go. In the end he escapes the drug. The end was what got me sobbing. As an addict you have to burn down your past... gotta lose all those addresses , drop all those old friends because the drug has integrated itself into your whole life. You have to burn it all down and leave it behind. Thank you so much for this reaction, Amanda. You got a new sub.

[@deejayturtle]

I am also a 3 time suicide survivor.

[@MentalAmanda]

I am so SO proud of you for your recovery! I absolutely had to burn down my life and start from scratch to really find happiness.

[@Willhmartin]

The reason I like Ronnie is the fact that he is a real guy.. he did what he had to do in the past ..made mistakes in the past ....but all of those things result in a pretty damn great musical mind and ability.i can't wait to see what he evolves into now that he has control of what he creates.. could be watching one of the great ones ..

[@bst.1502]

You should compare the revamped version to the original version...its wild how much Ronnie has grown over the years!

[@jdsim9173]

You are meant to be here, we all love you for being you. The song is about a toxic relationship, and she is the problem.

[@DarionJackman]

As a person with terrifying existential dread... thank you for putting some light on us. lol

[@10LinesTechnician]

I know you've been recommended Popular Monster quite a bit, I definitely recommend the song and video, but having the lyrics up will really help you truly understand his message in the song. Watched a few of your videos, I appreciate your message, people that know my past and upbringing don't know how I was able to come out on this side. Keeping "normal" was really hard sometimes, but we do what we have to, in order to survive. Much love!

[@MentalAmanda]

Normal is overrated! People constantly ask me how I survived and actually found HAPPINESS. I often reply, because I stopped letting it be optional.

[@dupeesfashionconsultant4204]

Truthfully you are that princess, you may have taken a different path but you reached it nonetheless. It takes an incredibly strong person to stand up to their addiction and come out the other side so don't sell yourself short. As someone who is a recovering addict and has lost countless family members and friends to addiction. It takes so much strength to deal with that. I share your dark feelings too....but it will pass

[@MentalAmanda]

Proud of you for overcoming your demons! I'm sorry for your losses.

[@Ghostshiva45]

You are a beautiful soul. Your light is such that even your darkness could not defeat it. I've been there too, luckily I've tamed my demons. Oblivion is a myth.. Advaita Vedanta. That gave me the answer, and gave me my freedom. ❤️🙏

[@ricks7093]

This song broke me down to! After almost 20 years, she tells me i havent been in love w you for over 15 yrs!!! My oldest is 16, two more kids and a marriage later. So married in church, vows taken and spoken when you dont love someone, wth

[@MentalAmanda]

I am so very sorry. I hope that you are able to heal and find someone worthy of your love. Here if you need to talk.

[@wellitsureisntdale1860]

I get annoyingly bad anxiety when I’m trying to go to bed. I get adrenaline bursts as I’m trying to sleep and then panic about anything that could have Caused the anxiety.

[@MentalAmanda]

I have been there! I originally made this meditation to help myself, but decided to share it a while ago: kzbin.info/www/bejne/jnKWloSQp92Np8k

[@milannikolic1098]

I started to be afraid to love. Because I quickly bond with that person. As much as she hurt me, I want her to be there, to exist in my life... But I am to blame for that, because I start something that I know cannot be realized, I create expectations that I know cannot be realized. It's all a labyrinth... I need someone, but I'm afraid to let him in my life... And so on and on and on... It usually goes like this: I bond, I fall in love, I lose her, I suffer...

[@MentalAmanda]

I get close to a person then push them away because I'm afraid they will abandon me. I get the mind labyrinth! Just know that you CAN fight those urges by being self aware and working on the limiting beliefs. I did and I've never been happier!

[@milannikolic1098]

@@MentalAmanda Thank you for your answer! I'm trying to do it, but I still can't go against myself...

[@MentalAmanda]

@@milannikolic1098 YET. You can't do it YET. That doesn't mean it's impossible!

[@milannikolic1098]

You are right. Thank you for your support! It means alot 💖

[@TanelTheAntiWokeGuy]

The survival mode is i'm on at all times. Been born this way. Had to sleep with one eye open since childhood. But hey. You gotta chill or you're gonna lose your fucking mind.

[@ditsiwt]

Have you listened to Badflower - Ghost?

[@robquince3076]

I've been in battle with my demons for over 40 years and fighting to live is excruciating at times its always there and never ever goes away x but I believe its my punishment for being worthless x I've failed in life and failed everyone in my life and my punishment is to punish myself through mental self harm x it's what I do and sometimes it's hard because I just want switch off and be at peace x

[@MentalAmanda]

We have all failed those we love the most. We don't mean to. When we know better, we do better. And sometimes we have to learn lessons multiple times to truly LEARN. You aren't worthless. You feel remorse, which is human and shows that you have a heart. I promise peace is possible here. I did some terrible things that I'm still coming to terms with too, but I've found happiness. I believe you can too. Much love.

[@gumgumclap2310]

You won't ever non exist. You are a spiritual being in physical form , and your spirit and journey will continue after this. I believe if you have a good heart and love God and continue to grow and evolve your conscience...you will end up in paradise with your ancestors from your lineage. They will be waiting for you. God bless

[@gumgumclap2310]

Fact. Energy can never be destroyed, only transfered....I encourage you to study Matthew LaCroix and his videos about everything may help you. ✌️

[@loganryan462]

For me, an this is just my thoughts on the point of life. My point of life is whatever i make it, there is no one reason for my being. I use to live careless and strung out on meth for years an years not caring whether i was alive or dead the point of my life back then was to just do as much an whatever i wanted to do before i killed myself or died. An then i had a kid. Shes 7 an my point of life. I have full custody and im also 7 years clean. Its amazing how a life with no reason an no real point of being can suddenly be consumed by someone who wipes away everything. Dont get me wrong i struggle still an get in these ruts and numb an cant explain why or antthing but giving up doesnt cross my mind anymore because i have purpose.

[@straitjacket3241]

Gonna second everyone saying to watch I'm Not A Vampire (Revamped) but also gonna add some others! Meg Myers' songs Heart Heart Head, Desire and Numb. She's a very raw songwriter and her songs perfectly capture a lot of the energy of mania, hypersexual self destructive fixation, depression and overwhelming pressures of relationships and society at large. Also gonna emphatically suggest Bring Me the Horizon's Doomed (live at the Royal Albert Hall) Oli Sykes writes a lot of very deep and relatable songs about his addiction issues, his recovery, and his support networks. Their style is a lot more aggressive but I relate so much to because of the sort of heavy emotion and just frustrated outlet. I hope you have a great week and keep on inspiring others to share their stories and seek support and healing!