How Your Birth Order Shapes Your Marriage (Best of 2024)

[@megalopolis2015]

I'm a middle child who was raised as a firstborn, but who was the favorite, as the baby. I have a major sense of responsibility, who makes lists, and has a long memory and plans and goals, yet Loves surprises, and enjoys expressing individuality, but am also often unfortunately invisible. I'm in Love with a baby who was raised as a firstborn, but who has a tendency to want to be catered to. He was very Loving, thoughtful, generous, and compassionate. We're in individual counseling, in different states, and I've been taking care of my elderly mom full time for nearly twenty one months. Prayers are appreciated.

[@mischelemiller5020]

Prayers. I didn't go back after my mom passed. It's hard

[@Hairitage2023]

🙏🏾🙏🏾🙏🏾

[@ellen3467]

​@@mischelemiller5020 my mom just passed and I was long time caregiver. What do you mean about didn't go back? Thank you

[@mischelemiller5020]

@ellen3467 my husband and I still live separately. We talk as often as politeness alows us to. It's been 2 years.

[@sylviabradford7926]

🙏

[@MalchevaIrina]

With all due respect I can’t agree that birth order defines your personality as much. I am the e youngest one and I’m the one who give comments, instructions, I’m list maker and so on. There are so many different factors that are molding us into the person we become.

[@BrianJuntunen]

You sound like every youngest child that I have known.

[@JustJada98]

I agree. I am the youngest and the only reliable, responsible one. I have to mediate the whole family and any problems that require overseeing somehow ends up my burden to deal with.

[@focusonthefamily]

@Jada Taylor We are sorry to hear that. Please know we are here for any help or resources we could possibly give you. We even have counselors who would love to speak with you, if you ever need. If you’d like to talk with one of our counselors (at no cost to you), call 855-771-HELP (4357) weekdays between 6 A.M. and 8 P.M. (MT). God bless you! - Treasure H.

[@lucygarcia7199]

There are always exceptions or outliers to the rule. Dr. Leeman’s findings are more a general scale. As individuals, many of us do not fit an exact mold or we may have a combination of many different birth order attributes or characteristics. Therefore, it does not disqualify his findings, but instead provides many of us a better understanding of our loved ones and how to get along or work out our differences to make it work. Respectfully, food for thought.

[@lucygarcia7199]

There are always exceptions or outliers to the rule. Dr. Leeman’s findings are more a general scale. As individuals, many of us do not fit an exact mold or we may have a combination of many different birth order attributes or characteristics. Therefore, it does not disqualify his findings, but instead provides many of us a better understanding of our loved ones and how to get along or work out our differences to make it work. Respectfully, food for thought.

[@Tehutli]

Just found this channel! Glad I did. Such wholesome and genuine content unlike a lot of family-focused content online. As a family advocate this is a great resource 👍

[@AndreaStrong-z6q]

I have read through many comments and am not surprised by the people who agree and those who disagree. There are too many factors to make blanket statements of all people, and there is enough commonalities to make this video true. In the end the Scripture instructs us to love others as Christ loves the church. We all have hope for what ever our situation.

[@Somebodys_Mother]

I'm a baby married to a baby. He has great work ethic, but has kept to himself far too much throughout raising children, just as his dad did. I have kept the leader position open, but I was the one who had to make sure things didn't utterly fall apart. It's not been easy, because I am just a baby 😅. Our children weren't raised in the Christian home we hoped for. But God... He is faithful to finish the good works He began. We are still growing and hopefully more together now. I pray for my children every day. I hope he does too. Yes! We have seen that encouragement helps overcome a lot of bad habits and insecurities.

[@focusonthefamily]

@Somebody's Mother Wow. Thank you so much for sharing! What a light and blessing you are. Keep those prayers up! God hears them! God bless you and your family! - Treasure H.

[@cknowles7402]

Prayer is key to healing ❤️‍🩹, growth and peace

[@ruthturkington1736]

Yes, us first borns are like that!! My hubby and I are firstborns my parents were first borns. Both of us have wonderful marriages.

[@MLTDPT]

Oh. My. Goodness. My husband and I are both first borns and he’s so right…

[@Ruth-xr2dz]

My husband is first born but to me he has no characteristics of first born. His sister who was born two years after him definitely acts like a first born. My husband avoids leadership and conflict like the plague. He wants me in charge of everything. I definitely took charge of raising kids, paying bills, keeping family schedule, doctors visits, etc. His rationale was “you do it better.”🤔 His sister takes charge, quick decisions, got power of attorney of their mother, controls her finances, tells everyone what to do, etc. I have never been able to figure out their dynamics. The only thing is the dad that raised him was not his biological father and he did not discover this until he was 19 (a drunk cousin felt compelled to tell him.) My husband said he never felt like he belonged in the family. He said his sister was so much like the dad that raised him that it seemed they had their own secret code. I never quite understood this because my husband is so much like his mom in so many ways. Perhaps he just never identified with the dad that raised him. Anyway, I have characteristics of baby and firstborn. (Sibling above me is 6 years older). It’s all rather interesting but I don’t think everyone fits into a box neatly.

[@THrEeMuNkEes]

Before I watch … I am oldest of 3, brother in the middle of two girls. I am a go-getter, serious, adventurous ambitious, detail oriented and loyal/reliable, entrepreneurial, list maker, clean freak and a survivor. My brother is the rebel, struggles with lying, was an alcoholic before severe sickness, broken family and my sister - funny, social, easy going, life of the party!

[@purpleskald8130]

I am a firstborn and I felt <a href="#" class="seekto" data-time="695">11:35</a> to my heart. I am a first born that I feel I didn't receive the blessing of a firstborn. I was always taught that I need to take responsibility of my younger sins but I never really was respected. Whenever one of my siblings sinned, I was blamed for creating a bad example. Therefore, it was my fault. I was always treated like a younger child with no responsibility, yet I had to carry the burden of the firstborn. Everytime I would correct my young siblings, I was corrected for making a correction undermining my attempts to be a good brother and leadership. Thus I received little respect from my siblings as a the firstborn. Fast-forward 20 years today, I think it's slowly shifting today. I was asked to be a godfather of my younger brothers kid and that was definitely a blessing. But this is just how I feel, I'm not entirely sure if this is 100 percent correct and what happened.

[@jp5419]

My first born husband was coddled, parents were the original helicopter parents, he is not a leader nor can he make quick decisions. Suffers from high anxiety, and really requires a lot of support. Me… last born out of 4 (then when I was 10 little brother was born) and operate like a competent general.

[@agnesouma8784]

😂😂😂😂

[@jessyjonas4988]

This is excellent content Thanks Thanks FOTF

[@focusonthefamily]

@jessy jonas Thank you for sharing. We are so so glad this has blessed you. - Treasure H.

[@HenryFidelThomas]

What IS FOTF ?

[@petronellakayanan5160]

I am the 7th of 11. I have learned to keep to myself. My career was in IT.

[@androidphone6880]

This is inverted for my brothers... Oldest is fly by cuff adventurer and chronic entrepreneur, middle is worrying perfectionist company man... Youngest, me, is ultra introverted go with flow entrepreneur married to an oldest also entrepreneur who does behave as described here, always planning and correcting... She says my worst trait is that I'm usually right.

[@thamanig9289]

I'm a last born, always had the rationale of a first born. Both my brothers who are 6 and 5 years older than me are spoiled and basically I take care of everyone. I was a bread winner at 22 years and the mediator or the family. Husband is a middle child, who was the least loved by their mom who abondoned then. Most responsible, logical and calm. My husband and I are the ones that provide more for our families financially and emotionally and have a successful romantic relationship. But also trauma changes these dynamics. Both my husband and I experienced a whole more childhood trauma compared 5o our siblings and that forced us to grow very quick.

[@paulahall7585]

I read the book years ago and if I remember with that kind of age gap you are a first born.

[@RealJulianaInspiration]

Yes, first daughter, and no 4th out of 9 siblings in birth order. Traditionally, in my culture, first daughters assumed most of the family responsibilities, a role model to other siblings, and I did most of that and am still doing today. I am proud, though it can be overwhelming.

[@mariebrowne418]

The eldest daughter becomes the other mum..

[@my6732]

I come from a family of 9 as well , 7 boys and 2 girls. I am the seventh child. We didn't have an order of who did what. We just all took care of each other. We are very close in ages , basically a year or so apart all the way down to me . The last 2 boys arrived when I was 7

[@Heaveniswaitingforyou]

My husband is the middle child and I’m the oldest! He’s 5 years older than me. Very interesting! I tend to take charge over many things in the marriage but my personality is overall very much a follower type. So interesting!

[@bmcdonald7303]

Same for me.

[@energeticsoulhealer888]

I'm the youngest of 9. I create lists, am very organized, a planner, entrepreneurial, on time, a leader, opinionated, and stay as far away from drama as I can get. I'm equal parts responsible and fun, lol. Oh and I do love surprises. I do love babies as friends, as they are wayyyy more fun❤

[@nunyabb]

Got the book from previous shows and I’m glad I did❤❤❤❤❤❤

[@JaneThatcher89]

Which book please?

[@focusonthefamily]

@Jane Thatcher, this is the book: bit.ly/3UHymcs. Please let us know if you have any other questions. God bless you! - Treasure H.

[@BJ-bc7sl]

My oldest husband is so difficult, rigid, and manipulative. I’m youngest, flexible, responsible, and easygoing. I’m miserable in this marriage. Oldest / youngest Terrible mix.

[@amyfullmer5047]

Ditto! Exact same for me! We should be friends ❤ it’s been a miserable 36 years for me and divorce doesn’t seem to offer any better situation because of finances. I’m instead in a relationship with Jesus

[@MayBlake_Channel]

I'm the oldest and I'm not "difficult, rigid, and manipulative." This doesn't sound like a birth-order thing, it sounds like your husband is controlling

[@BJ-bc7sl]

@@MayBlake_Channelmaybe it’s a combination

[@MayBlake_Channel]

@BJ-bc7sl Could be. I'm still very concerned about her marriage, though. I'd reccomend reading the book "Why Does He Do That?: inside the minds of angry and controlling men" by Lundy Bancroft. It may bring clarity on some issues

[@monicanixon5140]

I think even before I listen ...parents are much more careful 🧐 & rule focused ,have more anxiety with first borns.

[@Mmathapelo-bd5ed]

Thanks

[@focusonthefamily]

@Mmathapelo You are welcome. We are so glad it has blessed you. God bless. - Treasure H.

[@REBEKAHJOHNSON-lh6xh]

Middle baby here!! Older sister (3 years) younger brother (2 years). Crazy how life works. We all thought I’d be the first to be married, but my little “wild child” brother has been married a year and a half now! And my sister has been married for a good decade. I’ve barely even jumped off the porch with dating.

[@StormSheldon]

"I would love to hear your opinion on this". Good one.

[@sharonhalmeoni]

I am the last born of quadruplets. I do say I’m the youngest. I’m very laid back compared to my other identical sisters. Financially, they all have enough money to spend. I do budget my finances and do good on what I have. I like this topic!

[@glee_again2594]

Neat. Not many can say this. Love that you truly follow the birth order with moments rather than months/years apart.

[@laramatthews2082]

<a href="#" class="seekto" data-time="860">14:20</a> pray together audibly

[@joschmo1007]

Heaven above, is what he said starting at about <a href="#" class="seekto" data-time="740">12:20</a> true. I am married to an Air Force pilot -- and he wasn't in the Air Force when we got married, but man alive dis it bring out the nitpicky in him -- and that statement is absolutely spot on. His perfectionist attitude has torn our kids up in ways. It isn't intentional, but we cannot neglect to observe our behaviors as parents and how they effect out kids. Thank God for Romans <a href="#" class="seekto" data-time="508">8:28</a>-30! And I mean that in the most reverent way. What a mercy! What grace on us as parents and as children! What a blessing that God can still fix my kids after I screw them up!

[@bobwishart8780]

Amen!!

[@clairebee5904]

I'm # 7 last born and that doesn't describe me,i ended up being the most responsible, took care of my mother that had dementia for 10 years.

[@KristelViljoen]

Middle children are treated as if they are just ad on or coincidence. They don't have a voice and nobody cares. They have to learn to put up or shut up. They learned early on to read people and situations like a book.

[@ntokozomathaba2337]

Hi from South Africa, firstborn here and loving it, i was born to raise everyone in my family and i wasn't even aware, i just assumed responsibilities as an older child thinking that if i don't do anything no one will. Also the good part about it was that my mother used to affirm me more than my siblings making me more confident and loved at the expense of my siblings....well they were also spoiled 🙂 I used to hear people asking me if am i the firstborn and i would be asking why are saying that? and they say we can tell by the way you give orders and leading. So yeah i am loving it❤❤❤😂😂

[@bobwishart8780]

What an insightful man!

[@employme2]

Please do more of this type of content, is ts very enlightening. Thank you 🙏

[@micahortega6041]

It's funny. As a middle kid we often feel overlooked. Maybe we aren't but there is something inside us that makes us feel that way. This video reinforced that haha. <a href="#" class="seekto" data-time="1653">27:33</a> long video and 40 seconds about middle kids. There rest was about first and last kids haha.

[@inchristalone25]

Yeah that's about right! I had that overlooked middle kid disease.

[@GMBL-h3w]

Middle child here, older one run everything, couldn't do no wrong,very bossy. Younger one didn't have to do anything. Middle got the blame for everything!!!​@@inchristalone25

[@deniseflorence381]

Think of it like this, when you get caught playing in mud with your siblings, my two older siblings got it worse than I did. I also learned not to repeat their mistakes.

[@rainewaters6371]

Has there been any research on individuals with high functioning autism, who have developed unknowingly what is called, 'masking autism' (meaning they mostly present as typical but are developmentally atypical), and birth order.

[@mushroombird9400]

I’m technically an only child as my sisters are 15 and 17 years older…..however; I’m such a baby of the family! My husband is the eldest and organized and self motivated and such a leader. We have one child and she’s just like her daddy! And thank goodness because I have just taken over the role of being the unorganized but fun loving and lighthearted baby.

[@denisetaylor-crommett4781]

My husband talks too much and I am the quiet one. He always wonders what I am thinking and I never wonder what he is thinking because he doesn’t shut up. 😂😂 I am 2nd born of 4. My husband is last born.

[@pattiemattice3530]

I could have written your comment. 2nd of 4, husband last of 5. He’s the talker.

[@pandjnixon]

I agree with this up to a point, but some first borns who have been adopted and have ended up in being the last born, have been treated differently. This doesn't take into consideration personalities and different temperments of various individuals. I appreciate this as a general guide only, but i did pick up some good tips, thanks❤

[@tracyrussell4116]

I’m a disobedient middle child. Married to a loved firstborn Son. Thank you Lord.

[@SophieSisley]

Hello everyone. I am French and I did not understand everything, because it is fast, even though I put the subtitles. It is interesting, because I had never heard before that we, as either first, middle or last born child, could have a different impact in our mariage. I guess we can trust the experience of this man, who seem to know what he is talking about. My question is : should we have cared about knowing in what order our future spouse was?

[@BrianJuntunen]

I wish my parents had this guy to listen to.

[@tanyawatkins7206]

Many of you are commenting on the “blanket” statements made- but do not know his whole study on this. There are MANY variations. I am one. My brothers and I are only 2 years apart, each. I am the youngest. But I am the only girl. I have both oldest and youngest characteristics. I Mothered my middle brother because he seemed useless and incapable to me because I make lists and order, etc. But I am also super creative. Laid back in some areas and have been less responsible in some ways. My middle brother has turned out to be very successful, though in my thinking he is flying by the seat of his pants.

[@415jsg]

Does this apply across cultures ? And I’m curious to know about siblings who have years in between like my sister and I are 10 years apart

[@ntokozomathaba2337]

Yes, it does. Hi there from South Africa ❤

[@Somebodys_Mother]

Though, from what I have understood, 10 years apart can be more like two only children, depending how close the family is.

[@Catherine-ty8ss]

I was born the baby who became an only child at age 14 when my mother died and my brother went to go live with my 13 yrs older than me sister! With so many broken families birth order changes many times.

[@kathy6222]

Your family dynamics may change, but your birth is not changeable.

[@LindaCoffee-e3k]

Raised with 6 brothers me right in the middle. I was over looked being female. It was all about the boys.

[@laxel01]

Love it!!

[@amyclutter7259]

I have never gained much from these conversations, partly because I come from a blended family, and partly because my sisters and I don’t fit neatly into the categories. My own kids (4 of them) don’t really either. Youngest married to a youngest, 16 years going strong.

[@bud5084]

I'm a first born. As a teenager I was to do all the yard work and anything else that can up while my two brothers watched tv. Mama would let them do it because they were " sickly", but they could do anything they wanted to do. My wife is the youngest child and she it the one they all went to to solve any problems that came up and she took care of her parents in old age.

[@maureenmckenna5220]

No doubt birth order matters. Experiences are so different for first, second and so forth. Your parents are different as first parents. But, it also matters if you are very close siblings and if you are same sex. There is so much more to this than just order, although order must be considered.

[@salemthorup9536]

Married an oldest child and he does not act like an oldest child. I'm the 3rd, but have 6 younger siblings. No, a man won't always talk if you ask him his viewpoint. Probably the most frustrating thing in my marriage is his lack of talking. I've asked and begged him for his thoughts for almost 20 years.

[@mtg6753]

Really good video!

[@dianediliberto1876]

Interesting. Thank you.

[@focusonthefamily]

@Diane Diliberto You are welcome. We are so glad it blessed you! God bless! - Treasure H.

[@patsydanec7864]

The English teacher explains it!🥰

[@deborahsteele7427]

"VERY ENCOURAGING AND INSPIRING MESSAGE, INDEED" ... BLESSINGS, MS. DEBORAH J. STEELE - 12/11/24

[@rhoadestraveled]

What about blended families… I was a first born until I was 5. Then my stepbrother came in. He's 3 years older. Then my mom and stepdad had a daughter that is 8 years younger than me.

[@laramatthews2082]

<a href="#" class="seekto" data-time="160">2:40</a> that was my best friend w/her son 😆 🤣 caught on video too ... the dirt and the freakout 😆

[@ellen3467]

Thank you for replying. I asked because the joint caregiving I'm sure has caused damage between us and now I feel like I'm done

[@brendagillespie2805]

Oh how many times i have told my sibling that i had a different mother than i did. They look at me and say i am wrong. After listening to this i understand why I say this (Firstborn Child)

[@gardenroom65]

I’m the youngest of 4, I avoid them all. I’m 65 btw.

[@annak8249]

I am the youngest baby and married the oldest❤️

[@roseseifert8939]

Regardless of birth order everyone has all these capabilites and differences. Some are stronger others weaker.

[@paulaferrari48]

I'm 1st born of 5..he nailed my personality to a T!

[@saraneudorf526]

We are both middle of the family,had a rough many day's,,,, especially while raising children,,

[@jaykay3839]

Oh wow, that critical mother comment was dead on with my in-laws. My poor BIL could do nothing right. Second born sister-in-law was Miss perfect.

[@cherylwin9364]

AGREED 👍🏾

[@laramatthews2082]

<a href="#" class="seekto" data-time="151">2:31</a> I joked that my [only] son's first words were going to be, "Be careful" 😆

[@nunyabb]

It’s the same skill at work, that works against you with those you love.

[@carolcalhoun9969]

pisces man-cancer woman-wowza-5 star compatibility

[@rachelsantilli1755]

What about all the only children?

[@nunyabb]

<a href="#" class="seekto" data-time="360">6:00</a> middle child

[@goldenrulebanner2896]

As a middle born, I went through a phase of bad attention is better than no attention.

[@julieshepard3409]

6 kids in family. I had a brother 1 year older. He died when I was 6 and he was 7. I became oldest then even though 2nd born. Wonder how that applies to me.

[@focusonthefamily]

@Julie Shepard We are so sorry to hear that. Thank you for sharing. Please be assured we are praying for you! Your birth order would stay the same. Please let us know if you have any other questions. God bless you! - Treasure H.

[@chenderson18]

I am the last born and have all the characteristics of a first born. All my life my siblings looked to me for direction, and still do. 😅

[@shannanross5628]

See that you are only really addressing functional families but not the ones that have dv; child abuse and neglect; mental health issues for any family member and substance abuse

[@mischelemiller5020]

Im Oldest- husband youngest, BUT he is 20 years older then I am . Birth order still applies.

[@Donna-cc1kt]

The era of history affects who you marry. When the US went through WWII, the dust bowl and the Depression and the Korean War our families were of a mindset. Girls married early as expected. Our parents were not of an enlightened expanded. life concerning women. We women made children, hopefully some males. I married at 18. Then the world exploded with innovations and a more expanded woman’s role as a contributor to the world. Here I sit with 2 degrees, a profession and a family. Now retired. Thank God the role of a woman is now expanded. I was first born but not fully valued in the early family although loved. Point is - I say it’s your opportunities not which came first, second, third. That isn’t the factor but the opportunites .

[@chf9514]

I am a first-born. But most of the attributes of the ‘first born’ that you described in this video do NOT describe me!

[@anumchika]

Same here

[@desleighcoombs2067]

Same for me.

[@jaykay3839]

I'd love to hear more too. My husband is youngest of three. He's the clown. He avoids conflict like the plague. Lies so much his pants are on fire. 🔥 I'm the youngest of two. I'm a brat. Need help with a lot of things. Fairly laid back but also codependent like my mom (she was 2nd oldest of 11). I'm critical of his driving but I'm working on that. Even though he's been in nearly 20 accidents and I have never had one ticket. Oh! Okay. The disabled children explanation helps with my 5th child. She's organized and incredibly capable like a first born but she's sandwiched between two special needs siblings And she was born after her brother died. Someone said they're in charge but the youngest. That's called being bossy.😅 My youngest child is bossy. 😅

[@bobwishart8780]

Our 10 yo granddaughter is young sister of her autistic brother who is non verbal and with complex special needs. She is not particularly blessed with a gentle and quiet spirit but my goodness! such an enduring little champion, full of energy and grit and support for her big brother….you can’t help but love her!

[@adampatton6072]

What about being an identical twin with an older sibling?

[@focusonthefamily]

That's an interesting question. Dr. Leman was a guest on our show, we would like to encourage you to check out Dr. Leman's website where you'll find valuable resources' and can pose that question to him. Here's the link bit.ly/3ZEHd2o Blessings, Ella L

[@danielaamaning92]

What about no. 10 out of 11? that would be me!

[@gregs157]

What about the youngest child, who's sister was 8yo older and acted like an only child, my Dad died when I was 12, my sister was always more immature. Now my sister died when she was 42 and I'm left help guide my mother through dementia. I'm probably nothing like most last born children. Btw, my wife is the first born of 2, ironically her brother died when he was 35. Now we're both only children. It's a very strange life we've had.

[@davidandshera744]

I was adopted at 12 days old and I became a first born but I came from a family where I was second born. How does that play out?

[@focusonthefamily]

@David and Shera Hello! Thank you for reaching out. Dr. Leman is so talented! Please refer to his website for any additional information: bit.ly/3BvPGf1. God bless you! - Treasure H.

[@Champ577]

I'm the youngest...always the baby 😢 over dependent difficult to decide

[@ntokozomathaba2337]

Sounds like my youngest sister last born ❤she's work of art i tell you😂

[@sheilacarriker1340]

My husband has an older sister,and a younger brother.

[@EllenSmyth]

Birth order matters to eternity. But it is not which order you already were born in, but which order you will be born in. Will you be firstborn? Will you inherit a double portion of eternity?

[@feliciawalker1004]

My mom has 4 . 2 girls 2 boys. My sister is the oldest than my brother, than Me and than my younger brother. So I'm the youngest girl but my brother is the youngest boy. So I'm considering the middle child?

[@tuliphayward4833]

Lol, the leapfrog the queen charles and anne

[@glee_again2594]

Middle child “We don’t care!” Is sooooo my middle child as well as the rest of what he said.

[@Somebodys_Mother]

My middle daughters are the responsible ones.

[@romanavrana1782]

I am a fist Child (daughter), who was married to a man who is a middle child between two sisters.

[@bernicechukwumba5622]

What happens when two first born children marry each other? Probably a bad combination?

[@amandathode4540]

Only child for 13 years so I’m the oldest and only at the same time. No wonder I have no idea what I’m doing.

[@shawnmiles100]

HOW DOES BIRTH ORDER WORK WITH PERSONALITY TYPING?

[@focusonthefamily]

Great question, Dr. Leman was a guest on our podcast. Here is his website which is full of resources that can help you answer that question. bit.ly/3ZEHd2o

[@TheAndibk]

Question: my husband is the first born of 7 kids. Then the next two came,rapidly, almost a year after each other.

[@focusonthefamily]

Hello friend, are you asking if he would be considered first born? If so then yes. If you would like more resources on Dr. Leman check out his website bit.ly/3BvPGf1 Blessings, Ella L

[@weallhaveastorychannel]

He couldn't be more wrong about my brother and me. He's the first born and I'm the second. My brother is the exact OPPOSITE of what he described as a first born.

[@michellebower4643]

What happens when there is a break between the first and the second out of four? Male, 7 years later ME!, 4 years later another male and 4 years more a female.

[@focusonthefamily]

Great question, We would like to encourage you to check out Dr. Leman's website where you'll find valuable recourses' and can pose that question to hi,. Here's the link bit.ly/3ZEHd2o

[@elyciahfaithklaartjies]

The first male is the “only child, because you were born 7 years later - that makes you the eldest of your other 2 siblings.

[@michellebower4643]

@ feels that way!

[@jessicaharvey7446]

As I always ask what about adoption. From fourth to first

[@cyrairani2190]

First born... description on the dot.👍

[@scharliem]

Program nonsensical….this is just based on American household and upbringing….I was brought up in Germany, totally different narrative, mother never fussed what I ate, everything calm without this nervous tension….

[@bonnymorgan108]

So, i The 5th of 6 then our parents died when i was 3. Then i was adopted with my younger (youngest) sister when i was 4. So would i be classified as the oldest. Im very confused. No wonder I cant figure me out 😂

[@tessjones5987]

Depends on the marriage of the parents what roles are played. Many times the First is when the marriage was happy. The middle child is a stuck mode. And the following child is just a servant to the parents cause they didn't want them. The last child can be a non-event uninvolved parents.

[@shirleysantana783]

3rd out of 10

[@robinhartman6108]

I agree and disagree. It also determines generational. When you were more 1950’s etc