Former Miss USA

This episode is a beautiful, real-time unpacking of managing expectations while getting to know a potential love interest. Is it just platonic? Is it romantic? Love takes both parties to be submitted at the same time. Former Miss USA, Deshauna Barber and Marvin Echols, share their powerful story of "The Fateful Journey."
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[@Iamlonndanicole]

I am forcing myself to listen to your podcasts so that I won’t give up on love, marriage, and family. I use the Bible, prayer, fasting, and this podcast to heal. I see myself healed for real this year! Hello Future Hubby, meet Future Wifey!

[@RhondaR4]

You got this sister! Your future husband is near. Pay attention to what GOD has you doing. Sending blessings and hugs your way.🙏🏽❤️🌻

[@Unalunallenadeluz]

In the name of Jesus!

[@janicetaylor1272]

Remember what Pastor RC said "You don't need to be married if you need to be married ". Let's spend our single time enjoying life and doing what God wants us to be doing. Single and satisfied 😌. Blessings to you my Sister

[@Iamlonndanicole]

@@janicetaylor1272 I understand and I’m doing just that but I also know through the relationship I have with God, that part of my legacy and destiny includes marriage. If you knew my story sis….. bloodlines and legacy can end when you’re an only child and you don’t continue the legacy…it’s much deeper than a title and ring for me (edited)

[@Unalunallenadeluz]

@@janicetaylor1272 I love how God is preparing me so I start to say, "I'm not waiting, I'm training" haha

[@jerlynnghee207]

I admire the way that he disagreed with her. He kept touching her and reassuring her lovingly. Also not bending and dating while he was focused on his goals.

[@timbawangu3038]

Right👌

[@ajordan1847]

Yes, I observed that too. ❤

[@rachelmcpherson6010]

I loved that as well. Very Beautiful The Two of Them ! God Bless Their Union ❤

[@stephf4175]

Meeee toooo. Also loved how he spoke the words "I love you" in the midst of a convo, too. He bedda cover her! 🙌🏽 P.S., I do get the vibe that she covers him, too...😉

[@tylynn256]

This is a man who knew/ knows what he wants. He wasn't so pressed to be in a relationship that it trumped his goals. I love it!

[@asills423]

I love how he dated with the intentionality of finding a wife. He did not date to hurt or use women as objects. A man that was able to discern and refrain from poor decisions, not too many men can do that. His mind was not disrupted by the foolishness, and this was how he could find his Queen. She is a very lucky woman, and s is he. I can only imagine how this will go. To God be the glory.

[@georginachibbamulilo5968]

I agree. I also love her courage😊

[@teachandinspire437]

He's such a true Leader. He will continue to teach and love her in ways she's never known!♥️🙏🏾

[@fareedhawilliams-appah3560]

Please have them back 6 month to a year after they have gotten married. I would love to hear about their newlywed journey. Great podcast!❤

[@herfamiller139]

I beg to second this ps.👏🏾👏🏾

[@lafranceandco]

I agree because I think there is still some work that needs to be done here. If they continue to openly communicate, things will be worked through just fine.

[@mika4eva314]

I went to high school with Marvin and when I say him and his sister Focus in on their goals THEY ARE FOCUSED!!! They are really great, loving people. I wish Marvin and Deshauna the best in their future endeavors. #BlackLove ❤

[@nosindisomyeni]

Praying for more men who are this intentional like Marvin, don’t play with people’s feelings while looking for the one.

[@nikkyshamz2696]

Yes. Very impressive

[@MzzTPC]

Whew...The maturity of this young man is SOOOOOOO refreshing! All in decency and order while also knowing how to care and communicate with a woman! Love it!

[@angelstatum2584]

THIS!!

[@ajordan1847]

Their story had me revisiting my perspective of men and my impatience with intention, and now I understand why; my "bar" needs adjusting. Agree; so refreshing.

[@aielnod]

Seems out of order to me. She doing the persuing

[@MzzTPC]

@kiuleiaable They all addressed that point and she def noted and saw the error of her ways. I'm speaking the order in which HE pursued when ready. Not her approach. I would Never! Lolbvvs

[@ladiesofiron]

He was protecting his heart at the beginning whether he knew it or not.❤😊

[@nikkyshamz2696]

He definately was. I wish I was that intentional in my previous relationships. It's a very laudable thing.

[@williaminaloftin3814]

I love Marvin's intentional approach towards dating and marriage. His parents did an outstanding job of living out a beautiful example for him to emulate.

[@socasoul]

Their level of communication is really good. Love that he didn't let his ego come into the conversation. He was so calm and respectful and they clearly 'hear' each other.

[@cavellfrancis6449]

This episode was hilarious 😂😂😂😂 I love them for each other. He is so reassuring and leads in a quiet, gentle way

[@aielnod]

I think she leading

[@keepthechange1]

@@aielnod She definitely is leading. I don't think he will marry her. She is too much of a DRAMA QUEEN!

[@aeriel4972]

I can tell she respects him. He's knows how to handle her, and she admires him. I like this couple's realness.

[@mostdefmodest]

Marvin's approach to relationships, in terms of how deliberate & intentional he was in taking his time paired with his discernment, is commendable!

[@kayfleming5180]

When DeShauna talked about vetting people and raising the bar!!!! I ran around the room!! 🏃🏾‍♀️🏃🏾‍♀️🏃🏾‍♀️THAT is so critical! As a society, we’re so ready to microwave the courtship (vetting) process with just anybody. We need to set that thang on simmer. It’s important to see a person in all seasons (temperaments). Kudos to Marvin’s parents for raising an upstanding & outstanding young man! 👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽

[@RhondaR4]

Please bring them back in years to come. I'd like to see their growth, kids, and hear their stories.❤

[@cshell75]

This was so interesting to watch. I almost think it should have been titled “Managing expectations” or something related to “Timing.” I appreciate the honesty in this interview. All relationships don’t start like a fairy tale.

[@nikkyshamz2696]

Facts. Many definately don't start with bells and whistles.

[@jinajames3525]

I wasn't sure where this interview was going at first....BUT the nuggets that were dropped were worth the wait. They are the cutest couple and have a great future ahead of them. They've already shown they can work through adversity and differences. Keep going yall.

[@adinahj.9212]

I agree l had to force myself to continue to watch this episode 😬

[@nnena3631]

@Adinah J. Same, and I still don't feel good about it

[@jinajames3525]

@@nnena3631 hang in there. There really is some good stuff here.

[@mgm2923]

A man of honor! What a great example to other men.

[@jerlynnghee207]

I love the way she was unashamed to speak about anxiety. Her "No" pageant video is so inspiring.

[@beat4broadway203]

Ok.... all the comments say watch till the end, so I will. But the first 30 minutes sound like run sis run, because he did not pursue you.

[@sheistamikawells]

He has great communication skills and also has such an engineer-analytical mindset. 😊

[@genikathompson5432]

MY GOD ..... SHE SAID A WORD 👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾 CAN THEY REACH THE BAR ??

[@rebecca9519]

When the bar is low it's easy too easy to walk over it without making any effort. Well said. This couple will make it as they communicate with each other openly and lovingly.

[@genikathompson5432]

@@rebecca9519 Yes exactly, that analogy was just amazing.

[@nnena3631]

I appreciated her saying that as well.

[@IkeRuffRyder]

Stating your intentions is a KEY FACTOR

[@kishah4799]

I love their transparency. They are indeed on a fateful love journey, and I am happy the decided to trust the process. Thank you for this episode, Laterras!

[@roea7846]

This was a great story. More men and women need to take their time to get to know each other. People can be so in a rush to be in a relationship with someone they don't take the time to get to know the other person. I am happy it worked out for this couple. There is nothing like a man who knows what he wants.

[@reginaclaxtonministries]

That's why she felt anxious... She was operating outside of her position as the woman who would be pursued. I respect he was true to himself/his goals.

[@adriennenicolewilliams1366]

This is so good...and he is correct...understanding is EVERYTHING!!!!! I'm glad they are where they are today ❤️🙏🏽

[@liberty_-qf1nb]

My my be free

[@loisbanks4030]

Timing is everything with open honest communication! Great interview!

[@natalie3608]

Totally agree

[@kristinesmith1665]

There's nothing better than reassurance from a man who is so intentional - a true leader, methodical, caring and empathetic. He was very transparent without throwing smoke. He could see her pain and uncertainty and sought guidance to make sure he can be her trusted partner in their journey. I absolutely loved this episode ❤️ #gems

[@atlantasfaithsmom]

He was strategically reeling her in. He was interested the whole time, but felt taken for granted and ignored in the very beginning.

[@aielnod]

I don't like that. He playing games. and its Not that she wasn't interested in the beginning , she didn't even know him . he liked her in secret for a whole year before speaking . I don't like Their relationship. it's kind of sketchy

[@atlantasfaithsmom]

@@aielnod It may work, but I had the same feeling....

[@nnena3631]

@Ariel Nod He's giving red pill, and cut her down a notch vibes. I observed something else and I mean no harm. But his determination to not big her up or pursue her like other guys screamed insecurity, and when I saw their engagement video he appeared to be vertically challenged. There are men of a certian stature that have serious chips on their shoulder and take it out on women they feel have a high opinion of themselves and "neg" them to keep them under thumb I didn't even like her countenance in the interview it appeared self protecting and his distant and aloof..😠

[@nnena3631]

That sounds like a fragile ego to me. How were you taken for granted when she wasn't available and all you're doing is liking pictures on IG?

[@mzbrown6969]

@@nnena3631 exactly those who know know, no regard for her timeline, waited two years put her in the terrain of a geriatric pregnancy and the fact that she keeps entertaining him when he gave her nothing but negs is wild to me

[@ladydee7099]

I look forward to Wednesdays because I know Laterras is going to drop another GREAT DFW episode!!!! I can’t wait to watch this one!!!!

[@justinashealthyghanaianmeals]

Facts !!!

[@SandraJamesmentor]

📌He is not interested! When he is interested you will know it, you won’t be confused.

[@atlantasfaithsmom]

He was interested.

[@tiffmat9475]

This was actually refreshing coz it's not the typical love story, it almost seems very real, and they are also not too lovey dovey. This is actually the realest conversation, it was raw and honest!

[@Itsbrittanykerr]

As always Laterras, I like how you really dig and ask the important questions. I think they have a good shot but I’m concerned that the man is concerned with getting the upper hand in the relationship, out of his own insecurities. I hope that he changes his mindset so he can truly open up to all the intimacy that marriage has to offer.

[@womanofgod2948]

I loved this episode. Their love story didn't go the traditional way, but God bought them back together. What is for you, will truly be yours ❤

[@TiffanyBTV]

I was locked in after Laterras said “he’s not that into you”… i wonder how they were able to move forward because she did all of the initiating from beginning to end. I was watching with one eye open, hoping that one of them wouldn’t let the realization set in and they begin to overthink if they’re really meant for each other…. Let me keep watching

[@CEC805]

This is an interesting story because she mentioned having anxiety which would be a red flag for me personally or maybe the anxiety is from her pursuing him....

[@jakhyiajohnson7812]

Your thoughts are valid. I'm happy for them, but honestly if it was me, I would have dropped him like a bad habit and moved on with my life. From the outside looking in, it certainly appears that he just was not that interested. I would have felt differently if once they started speaking he was more intentional about courting and marrying her but he purposely waited until the end of the two years for the proposal. To me, he play too many mind games. I've learned through THIS podcast that it takes NO time for a man to know if a woman is the one. 6 months tops! NO way on God's green earth should MISS USA, as beautiful as she is have experienced mixed signals from a said man that was interested in her. Nonetheless, I wish them the best and pray they have a happy union.

[@kingleyo9277]

@@jakhyiajohnson7812 stop it lol you don’t know anyone in 6 months!! Stop lying

[@jakhyiajohnson7812]

@@kingleyo9277 I said a man knows within 6 months. These are the words from multiple men who have sat on that yellow couch. But as for me, I would certainly know if a man is the one within that same time frame. It definitely wouldn’t be two years.

[@ThirtySomethingDiaries]

It is incorrect to assume that because it us said here by a few men, it goes for alllll men. Some men may know, not ALL. BUT even those who know from 6 months or earlier, they will take their time. We are often rushing our way into relationships...starting it before it should, making it permanent before it should begin. There is no set formula for relationships...this worked for them, it worked for others too...we have to respect differences.

[@leatricewalker8038]

This was great! I loved how they are so comfortable with each other and authentic.

[@Letstalk_LoveHopeFaith]

Wowww amazing talk, thank you for allowing us to chime in on these!! Straight gems!!! But i have to say that my favorite part of these podcasts are your letters to your future wifey.. they are so poetic, real, and powerful!! you can feel the love you have for her with every word expressed even in the painful times!!! I'm praying for you and her and everyone connected to this journey!!!

[@deyaonsotti9594]

Very healthy conversation. Thank you all for being vulnerable.

[@godsfav]

Packed a punch in the beginning with setting the bar. Whewww Def watching til the end. Love this podcast. So many teachable and beauitful moments. 😇

[@WoundstoScars]

Another great episode. I love the respectful way they disagreed with each other and give each time to share their perspective. Many lessons that can be learnt here about communication and managing conflicting points of view.

[@ambriaberryhill7017]

This was beautiful! I truly enjoyed this conversation.

[@carojenn]

Watching this episode was quite enlightening.. Listening to Dashauna really made me think because I was able to recognize some similarities in my own mindset. It was refreshing to hear her articulation of how how her unmet and unexpressed expectations caused her experiences to be a different/negative one than Marvin's. I was also pleased that the Bahamas was positively mentioned and factored in their relationship. I am also hoping to attend your upcoming session in Nassau, and to meet you as well.

[@CherryCalypsoTea]

I agree why pursue an unavailable person. Healthy pursuit. He definitely had his head on straight. Glad connections happened has it should.

[@marlenapetty7561]

This episode was so resourceful! Insightful of terms that communication and clarity is essential. This was good. Super way of unpacking that timing should be considered.

[@rrnn6472]

Another great episode. This young man is so honourable! Hope he has the time to mentor and share his skillset!

[@Samone681]

This whole podcast is a word!! It's not how you start but how you finish!!! Both Deshauna & Marvin had amazing nuggets❤😍🥺

[@c.j.promiseland6456]

This was such a good interview. Brother knew what he wanted and him standing on what he says and thinks, let's us know he is a man of his word and he means what he says. They are communicating effectively, glad they are growing together. Patience on both sides is so key. I am glad she was willing to push past the fear, take it one day at a time.

[@denisehouston7805]

Thank you both for being transparent with your relationship this is so beautiful y'all being transparent about the negative & the positive. This interview was amazing & the clip made me cry. I wish you both the best - I pray God's Blessings for you both.

[@yeyeni9893]

I love how they worked through that! TRANSPARENCY AND COMMUNICATION!

[@IAmMonicaDenise]

This intro just preached! 🙌🏾(Great editing skills Laterras.)😊I can’t wait to receive this full message. I’m sure it will bless me as always. ❤

[@tikerachisley6028]

I so appreciate this episode! We often have these Pollyanna stories of love that make you think relationships have to start that way to work. Thank you for your honesty, transparency and vulnerability.

[@janicetaylor1272]

My bar was low. Unfortunately i was not taught about relationships. This podcast has definitely changed how i see myself. Thank you for another good episode 🙏

[@stephanielang5632]

This pod is fire! I appreciate how Ms. Deshauna put action to what she wanted. I learned, even more, to protect my heart in my intentions and communicate what is going on in my head. Assumption is not the move.

[@godsglory1921]

Thank you for this amazing episode Laterras. What a beautiful couple. I love their transparency. I do see how how God used what was unfamiliar to orchestrate their love story. As usual, you dropped some gems. The anointing was definitely flowing through you. God bless you MOG❤

[@JustUdoro]

WOW…such a beautiful and wonderful testament of who God is and how God works all things together for our good! This was beautiful and needed. Thank you again! 🙌🏾❤️🙌🏾

[@thegardineventvenue5052]

I REALLY loved and enjoyed their story! Super inspirational and 💎💎💎💎💎 GEMS. 🥰🥰 Thank y’all!

[@wpooh6181]

I loved this episode! It is Hands down my favorite to date!!! You must do an update!!!!! It reminds me of the conversations I have with my adult son who has a similar spirit to the young man in the video. These two young people make me feel hopeful for love. Just beautiful. It's great to see values and beliefs being displayed period! The world has gotten so far away from that! You must do a follow up to all of your most beloved episodes! Definitely this one!!! I don't expect perfection from these young couple but I do see something very special that is truly missing in the world today and it is inspiring! Well Done!!!!!!

[@lakeishawright535]

😂😂😂 4 minutes. .. I feel you. . Sis

[@VonnieVon86]

Their love story is so relatable as love can have challenges. Best of luck and love to them both.❤

[@OptimisticKTV]

I LOVEEEEE this LOVEEEE STORY!!! I love that he took his time to really get to know her and go through the process!! I can relate to her husband’s approach I’m definitely a person that takes my time to vet people especially when it comes to my heart! I’m definitely going to always uphold my standards. I’ve never had a serious relationship because I’m not trying to attach myself to anyone that I don’t see a future with! I take relationships seriously! You’re not about to be saying you dated me. Lol I love seeing this example in living color. This is so beautiful.

[@ileniepowell]

This was such an interesting and honest story by this beautiful couple. Seems like a solid foundation has been established. God bless your unión and a happy life❤

[@catherinenjoroge1236]

A very honest conversation.... A beautiful story n I pray that it all goes well...

[@ANGEL_MONIQUE]

Talking about being honest open and transparent.. This was a beautiful episode, I laughed 😂and smiled 😊 the entire time watching.

[@roslyntrotter-harmon4111]

Excellent podcast with this couple. I learn something about relationships each time I view your show. This couple has given me hope as my husband and I navigate marriage for the second time with each other. Powerful!

[@graceali-grap9919]

I wish he just admitted that he was not ready at the time... truth is most men who are interested don't need that much opening given to them to make their intentions known. I am struggling with the fact that he can't admit he was not ready, I can 't really say I would have encouraged my sisters to wait for him. listening to him talk he is a great guy...but he almost messed up...BUT GOD!

[@deidrefearn6634]

I have been following you for a while. I have grown spiritually by your guest. Lots of wisdom and understanding

[@heirtotheking5832]

Strategic! Intentional! Kudos! This is a beautiful love story!💞

[@ladytinag4276]

Great love story! I predict longevity. Blessings!

[@islanddreams1072]

Really nice couple. Great wisdom received from both parents. I pray they have a long marriage and that they get premarital counseling to make them and their foundation stronger before the wedding.

[@winfridahbanda5739]

Oh yes!!! I'm looking forward to seeing this❤

[@Justmythoughts___]

Really enjoyed the realness of this episode 🙏🏾

[@renembongn.5877]

Nice episode. I feel the guy was just being a gentleman as should be. A lesson learnt here, ladies should present and not pursue. I think the lady here crossed into the pursuit zone to ask him out to the trip then expectations were not met. I’m glad though that you both ended together, so keep it strong🙏🏿

[@jaybrad1070]

Beautiful interview and The last part hit home for me. God bless this union and once again Laterras, well done brother 🙏🏾

[@raej4884]

Another great one! Thanks for the reminder to communicate 👏👏👏

[@petajoanderson8108]

Such a beautiful love story … blessings to both of you and thank you for another wonderful episode Laterras

[@MNIU_]

This was a great convo even if most of it was about the trip , seeing this kind of communication, different expectations etc play out is very interesting

[@its.jasminesmith]

29 seconds in & Deshauna already preached I so relate to her def watching this whole video. So happy for her congrats to this beautiful couple! 🎉❤😊

[@kaones5928]

This was good! Great video Laterras. Please bring in Maya and Javaughn Graves for an interview as well. ☺

[@chblck]

Wow!! I just met Deshauna as the keynote speaker at Develop Her Women's Summit in Memphis and now here she is on one favorite podcasts. Keep shining Queen 👑

[@lindaholcomb6443]

Thank you so much for this conversation I received the answer to an issue that has had me stuck in the pain of heartache for years!!!!!

[@missadug]

Oh my goodness! I love her, I just taught a lesson on grit and showed the video of her Miss USA journey to the group of ladies I was teaching.

[@shaniagilles20]

I REALLY enjoyed this episode.

[@rebeccaemmanuel8074]

From 1:14:28 to 1:15:00 Love that! Sometime people shame or think people who don't have many relationships before getting married are weird or strange but I feel like that should be a normal thing.

[@nnena3631]

I'm a bit curious about that because in this day and age people don't have to be in relationships to deal with and sleep with a lot of people which could cause as many if not more problems as the relationship baggage..

[@chimakalu41]

Agree that should be a normal thing. One does not want to go around wasting time with different people. If they check the boxes with the one person they feel they can settle down with for marriage. Quantity does not equal quality.

[@rebeccaemmanuel8074]

@@nnena3631 Yeah I see what you mean. I did not mean it in that way (sleeping around or having flings). I'm talking about just not dating or sleeping with people until you're ready for a committed relationship.

[@williaminaloftin3814]

Amen, Rebecca! That was definitely one of my favorite parts (take-aways) of the whole conversation.

[@azanianpulse]

First time watching this podcast, was always lazy to watch because I find it to be very long. I really enjoyed this and will definitely be coming back for more. Thank you, and may the Lord bless the work of your hands regarding this podcast and Kingdom Royale.Blessings from Cape Town, South Africa 💙

[@asills423]

A lovely interview. Congratulations on your upcoming union.

[@elenapyle4524]

this was sooo good! Great podcast love the transparency between them both blessings to them thanx Laterras ❤

[@angelaphelps9986]

Beautiful! Beautiful! Beautiful couple! The genuineness and intentionality is refreshing. Thank you Marvin and Deshauna for sharing your love story! Laterras is an instigator!!!! But, I like it. Great podcast!!!

[@DearFutureWifey]

Lol. How was I instigating? I was trying to get to the bottom of it?

[@angelaphelps9986]

@@DearFutureWifey OH, you definitely got to the bottom of it, sir!!! Lol 😆

[@IAmJamieAlexander]

Laterras!! I take my hat off to you brother! Season 6 just keeps getting better and better. This couple/episode has me on the edge of my seat!!!!! 🔥🙌🏾😩🥰

[@stephf4175]

LOVED this podcast, as with most others. What a testimony of God's timing. I really enjoyed their dynamic together after so many years, but I LOVED that an organic "Fix it Jesus" part happened still happened here as a result of and in the midst of your powerful channel, LRW. Both a Blessing for them and us watching. 🙏🏽🙌🏽

[@williamjohnson7829]

Man, this was a good one. Enjoyed the podcast. Another great couple to sit on the yellow couch. 😊😊

[@leanetta3673]

OMG! If only Marvin's "strange" could be more common with men, this world would be more like Heaven!! Fewer Heartbreaks and less damage all around. Ooooh I can only wish. But I'm older, more seasoned and experienced, so romance isn't my go-to. Can we enjoy one another's conversations and company first... and then, let's contemplate if we both want something more. I LOVED this episode Laterras. Thank you all for sharing so honestly. (I believe y'all learned some additional things about one another and yourselves whilst you talked this out on the podcast).

[@leanetta3673]

Happy belated birthdays Laterras and Mother 🎉

[@myllenacarlagoyasilva9747]

She reminded me of myself at her age🫣 Thank you for sharing🙌🏾 God bless you 🙏🏾

[@91WriterzStatus]

Their story is so interesting! Expectations are very important.

[@snowbaby1982]

Woooo setting the bar!!! That was a whole word! Time to move that bar🙌🏽🙌🏽🙌🏽!!!

[@cletang88]

There were so many take always from this podcast. Thank you for sharing your experience with us. Definitely asking the same questions in my next relationship👍🏽

[@lrice645]

Whew..I love this.. you both are amazing....he makes her better and she's not afraid to admit it...

[@jakhyiajohnson7812]

I learned way too much through this podcast that men know within six months or sooner if a woman is his wife. The fact he intentionally waited until the two year mark to pop the question unsettles me. I would've went on 'bout my business personally. He playing too much chile.

[@cannon5041]

I came across your podcast on Instagram today and have been hooked ever since. I love hearing about the love stories from my people it's freaking amazing.

[@wendyjenkins6076]

Thank you so much wonderful segment everytime i watch your podcast it's always amazing crying here and there love it .

[@butterflyj08]

This was a fantastic episode. Deshaun said something profound she said she couldn’t longer sit in her anxiety and fear and just embrace and be optimistic. There’s a-lot of things that she has learned along the way with Marvin. I believe that purpose partners definitely help you uncover things that you may not see and will help you heal.