Friendcast Clips: "Let The Kids Play Blood Sports!"

[@GenerationWest]

In Goblet of Fire, the Qudditch World Cup at the beginning of the story, Ireland faced Bulgaria. Ireland beasted on Bulgaria so freakin' hard, that Bulgaria getting the Golden Snitch meant nothing, because Ireland had more points.

[@trickster721]

The implication seemed to be that at the pro level the snitch didn't matter as much, and the games we see these high school kids play actually kind of suck. Of course, it's really a narrative device to make the games all about Harry and Draco and avoid describing what ten other characters are doing all the time.

[@DoctaDaKing]

The concept of the snitch makes every player that’s not the seeker almost worthless. Team 1 can just get off their brooms and fucking take a nap on the pitch while Team 2 scores over and over and STILL win if Team 1’s Seeker gets the snitch before Team 2 scores 15 or more goals. It’s fucking nonsense.

[@canalsincontenido]

​@@DoctaDaKing you realize that you're answering to someone saying that the in fourth match you get getting the snitch actually made that team lose, right?

[@DoctaDaKing]

Es lo que hay Of course I do. I did say the that the regular players were “almost” worthless. Like the World Cup, there’s gonna be some abnormalities, but most of the time the snitch is the only thing that decides anything.

[@ScorpioTheScorpion1503]

I think the rule with the Golden Snitch is to make the game a test of endurance. If I remember correctly, there was one game that went on for several days. At that point, most people would probably get the Snitch just to make the game end.

[@dduuddeechil]

I like how Pat and Bakugo have very similar ideas of "sportsmanship" lol

[@trickster721]

I immediately thought of Bakugo as well. Pat is confusing anime with real life again.

[@theoneandonlymichaelmccormick]

Matthew Murillo The difference is that Bakugo eventually learns that his mindset is wrong-headed and dangerous. Pat is not so merciful.

[@P0rk_Sinigang]

@@theoneandonlymichaelmccormick Dangerous yes, but I hope he see the merit that it has in certain situations. God bless him for how he approached the Uraraka fight. That match was a crowning moment for both characters.

[@theoneandonlymichaelmccormick]

elrapido5150 Oh yeah. It’s honestly very noble of him to recognize the capabilities of all his opponents regardless of prior assumptions, and Eraserhead even points out that it’s the rest of the crowd who’s being disrespectful for chastising him for doing so. I’m actually referring to how his perspectives on heroism are revealed to be regressive, and problematic in nature. For instance, how he perceives combative superiority as a hero’s greatest priority, or how he believes that some people have inherent greatness and that it’s impossible for people to rise above their lot in life in terms of quirks.

[@P0rk_Sinigang]

@@theoneandonlymichaelmccormick Yup, I'm glad he's learning what it means to be a hero. And I just finished reading the latest chapter, and am happy to see that his views on victory have definitely not changed.

[@patrickjohnson1649]

Quidditch is basically a Game where; take any kind of sporting match in your brain and have that going on, and while it’s going on, there are 2 Drunk Guys fighting, each representing a different team, and who ever wins that fight; their team also wins.

[@nubius]

Pat's last comment... I agree with that whole-heartedly. "Taking them seriously means crushing them into dirt." This is exactly how most of us played NBA Jam and Blitz back in the day.

[@UCannotDefeatMyShmeat]

that is a factual statement

[@jackpollard550]

Flood, the, Stadium! Flood, the, Stadium! I want my naval battle re-enactments, dammit! We can solve boring sports, grab the historical crowd, and satisfy the psychopaths of the world!

[@FlameOfUdun96]

Well it’s better than letting them play water sports, I’ll tell you that for free

[@innocentsin6206]

Water polo is fun. Piss tasting contests are also fun. And who doesn’t enjoy swimming?

[@ScorpioTheScorpion1503]

Cloudy Sky Excuse me, you wanna run that back a little?

[@SoaringLettuce]

Ah Blitzball brotha, I remember the battlefield and the smell of al bhed blood.

[@kingoftropes922]

@@innocentsin6206 Y-you realize you can't act like one of those statements belong. Water Polo is mediocre.

[@Dwed746]

@@ScorpioTheScorpion1503 Nah man, I'm gonna have to back Cloudy up on this. Piss Polo, you have to figure out who's urine it is just by the taste.

[@throwdown1776]

Boxing is like for Honor, it's straightforward but people always use the guard break

[@NoahWolfWiseKingWolf]

And they would gank if they could

[@revelstatus2346]

We should have a Battle Royale for all the high school seniors who failed to graduate, last student standing gets his degree.

[@totaldestruction152]

Are there even enough failing students in any given school for that to work?

[@datedjr1]

Nobody Special lol clearly you did not go to school in a low income district

[@totaldestruction152]

@@datedjr1 I think all of the schools in Ontario are relatively well off.

[@datedjr1]

Nobody Special then how about the kids that got their degrees but barely passed have to defend their degrees from kids from other districts who can steel them by winning the fight

[@totaldestruction152]

@@datedjr1 Lol. I'd pay good money to see that.

[@marcotalin6410]

Pat in every argument: "By that logic, [outrageously illogical statement]"

[@Graysett]

I actually audibly cheered when i saw this title. That says so much about me. I remember there was one game in particular at my highschool that people would get injured so consistently in the kids started calling it a bloodsport unironically. It's called Gaga Ball for anyone interested.

[@aganaom1712]

best friend cast ft: wakka's extreme blitzball rules

[@Tokkoking]

killing an al bhed is worth 50pts.

[@insertnamehere8715]

This is all just the road to Blurnsball. Releasing the giant ant.

[@SeruraRenge11]

Ok new rule: if the fight goes past round 10, it officially HAS to end in a knockout.

[@JmasterPullmizter]

Nidhogg is literally a comeback game

[@Katagara84]

Baseball needs to take a page out of the Blernsball rule book, where there's a tiny hole in the outfield wall that will make you instantly win if you can bat a ball into it

[@PropaneWP]

Instant win is going to far. It just locks multiballs that are later shot out simultaneously while someone does a home run on a motorcycle. And then of course they release the giant spider from the bullpen.

[@elijahnakumura4375]

Clinching in boxing are usually to change position or hide your body movements or to go to the body as Woolie mentioned

[@axelskull]

naw its to take a rest or lock up your opponent if you're an out fighter and they got in close

[@elijahnakumura4375]

Until the ref starts handing out warnings sure, also does that not fall under “changing position”

[@Raven_Frame]

Matt's forehead is freaking me out.

[@geardog24]

Remember kids, no blood no foul.

[@malhekai]

Does internal bleeding count?

[@NekoKujo6785]

Nope, if they don't see it you're good.

[@malhekai]

@Jan Jappie They would just bite their tongues for free fouls. Take one for the team, you know?

[@TheZombieKing]

@@malhekai That's where the blood is supposed to be.

[@RedDragonEnigma]

I've had one unsanctioned boxing match that went super well and I'm going to start fighting as an amateur soon. it's so cool to see Woolie shares my love for the sport.

[@DoctaDaKing]

Back in my day, kids actually DIED in sports, and they were expected to just walk it off.

[@HellecticMojo]

Umbrella Corp plz

[@TactlessC]

"Sports should have a fighting game come-back state" Oh you mean like clinching in boxing?

[@RedDragonEnigma]

And Tyson Fury is a fucking inspiration. Coming back from drugs and alcohol abuse, being over 300 pounds and got up from one of the most devastating knockdown I have ever seen. And they declare the fight a draw despite him outboxing wilder 10 out of 12 rounds

[@patrickwilde5827]

These podcast titles are the kind of click-bait I can get behind

[@TerasOde]

Well, it's not click-bait if they do deliver what they are 'baiting', ya?

[@deslacooda]

"Promise nothing, deliver less." Awww yeeaaah.

[@KeysmashLP]

Chess boxing is the realist shit.

[@natetuimaseve7426]

I have no fuckin' clue what that is but please tell me its basically the chess mini game from Mortal Kombat Deception.

[@JackOfen]

Nate Tuimaseve I don't know what it is in MK. But in real life it consists of like 15 minutes boxing, then 15 minutes of playing chess, then boxing again etc. Whoever gets K.O.ed or Checkmated first looses.

[@GuyUWishUWere]

Woolie: Clinching is effective. Pat: It's boring though. Woolie: But it's effective. Pat: But it's boring. Woolie: Maybe if I tell you how effective and strategic and [Insert unrelated positive trait] it is you'll forget that it's boring. Pat: Nope God I hate it when people argue like this

[@XxNin10dohgamerxX]

Wait... which one?

[@sharkodile22]

This argument will be taking place in anything competitive until the end of time, and it will get no less asinine. The guy who knows next to nothing who just wants to be entertained, and the actual player who's just "Fuck you, pay me."

[@GuyUWishUWere]

@@XxNin10dohgamerxX Woolie. Pat says it's boring. Woolie never actually says it's not boring. They aren't actually having an argument, because they agree. They're just shouting random shit. It's annoying and it's mostly stupid, defensive Woolie's fault.

[@kingoftropes922]

@@GuyUWishUWere Well I think thats the point, Woolie isn't trying to agrue Pat, just give context why things are the way they are...kinda like what I'm doing now. Huh.

[@iller3]

sounds like someone wants to get punched in the asshole!

[@tomisabum]

I hate how my brain instantly turned this into a Plauge video with a cat lady as soon as Pat said 'I wanna put a tiger on the field'. MEGALOBOX.

[@PunishedBlake]

I think in one of my history classes, I learned that ancient wars often had assholes just stand far enough away to not get involved, but close enough to watch it. Bring back that sport. It seemed like it could be fun and have plenty of room for promotional events to get people drinking Mountain Dew and eating Doritos.

[@ShieldedToad]

Officers in the British army would bring their wives and friends to the battlefield, and they would just sit and drink champagne as they watched hundreds of men die through their binoculars.

[@PunishedBlake]

@@ShieldedToad That sounds fucked up, but also sounds realistic. I dunno. Maybe it's just me, but I'd want advertisements for battles and see if people get unironically hyped. "SUNDAY! SUNDAY! SUNDAY! Watch these soldiers try their best to survive. Come for the dismemberment, stay for the hot dogs."

[@treetheoak8313]

At pat I think the game you are considering is the game where a high school coach had his special needs team bull rush an opposing special needs team. It was apperantly very hard to watch a group of kids who just wanted to be active and play absolutely destroy each other. It was so bad that both teams players where crying and the winning teams coach got boo'd off the court and forced to resign as coach for that team.

[@StrawberryMooosic]

"You know what'd be fuckin' -pshshh- awesome? You remember in Mutant League Hockey where you could kill the other team and then the game would just end?" - Pat, 2018

[@inactive9544]

I've never seen a man get so passionate about something he doesn't give a single fuck about

[@TheSpiritus0]

Rules should serve to maintain to the spirit of the sport. If a rule is allowing someone in a combat sport avoid combat then the rule needs to be changed because they're diminishing what the sport represents.

[@joecool2721]

They should bring in that Italian blood sport. It's like soccer but you can kick and punch the shit out of people. Also has random boxing matches in the field!

[@masterofwisdom42]

Isn’t that just the normal Italian Football though?

[@exodosthesoulbanish]

Boxing is also super corrupt so not only can the matches suck, they can be rigged from the start. That's what I've been hearing about the Tyson Fury match.

[@Infusions]

Kids Blood Sports wouldn't work in today's era. I mean, think about how many of them would get participation awards!

[@PunishedBlake]

"Even though you kids all lost, we decided not to let the winning team crucify you and instead you get participation crosses."

[@SoaringLettuce]

Ah yes, posthumous participation awards xD

[@TactlessC]

>complaining about participation awards in 2018 What are you, fucking 40?

[@cyberninjazero5659]

@@TactlessC >what are you the exact expected age to have school age children That's the weirdest way to complain about the exact demographic who would have kids that get Participation trophies

[@theoneandonlymichaelmccormick]

Elena Manetta Nobody actually hands out participation awards anymore.

[@Plexuz0]

I really like these Friendcast clips because they're not 4 hour long podcasts.

[@LuffyEntertainment]

this is why I love Go(baduk), the only thing we argue is KO and Komi rulings which vary from country and really doesn't take away from the game either way it swings. The game has pretty much been played in its original state since its inception.

[@Grim_enigma]

how to make *insert subject here* with pat " GIVE THEM KNIVES"

[@JoshMonreaux]

14:50 Every soccer player gets one, until it's done.

[@furyberserk]

Memories of Justin Wong spamming in MKX on 10 yr old on stream with evil laugh. TWICE!!

[@romeobelisario3190]

It sounds like Pat would love Blood Bowl also, which I think is like British Mutant League Football, except it's fantasy

[@malikoniousjoe]

9:00 I wanna put a tiger on the field!

[@Sitruk86]

20:13 michigan. Dakota High vs L'Anse Creuse North. Football. their games regularly end like 55 - 7. every year its the same joke.

[@jebbryant6522]

There was a game of quitich where the team that grabbed the snitch was lossing by so many points they still lost

[@Kimosabes2hot]

With a title like that, -Woolie- *Pat* is taking us down the bad timeline.

[@Nuceful]

My idea was in football ("soccer") that the ball explodes randomly when touched- once per game. Not only does this encourage people to watch for the violence, like Nascar, but also justifies the abhorrent and ridiculous salaries the players receive.

[@Mantis47]

The worst part about Quidditch is that the Snitch mechanic is there just so Harry Potter can excel in that stupid sport without having any training or experience with it. No matter if everyone else have trained hard for years to give their best in the game, Potter will trip on his own dick, eat shit and somehow have the Snitch on his hand when he gets up. What a hero.

[@masonhugh4420]

I feel like football would be more popular in the US if the US had a decent team.

[@saladoc]

Top 5 sports that should be updated: -Soccer (for the americans, the rest of the world call it for what it is god damn it!) -MMA -American football. -Baseball (make the game go faster for fuck´s sake) -Basketball (but this one instead is about backing down many pussy rules, we want 90's basketball back) There is no point to put box on this list because is corrupt to the core and there is no hope.

[@ThatSamoanGuy]

There's a way to get what you want, guys... *SPORTS ANIME* (especially Kuroko, that show has Team Aerial Combos and legit comeback mechanics)

[@ACommonHero2]

The Snitch is the end game condition for Quidditch. You can't end the game without catching the Snitch. So the answer is technically no. On the other hand, there was one game shown in the seven books (The Quidditch World Cup) where the team that caught the Snitch didn't win. The logic behind that was apparently, "My team is losing so fucking badly that not ending the game right now is just going to further embarrass us. I'm putting my team out of our misery." I haven't read any of the side materials to know any more about the subject.

[@TactlessC]

Pat's solution to prevent clinching- MEGALO BOX BUT WORSE!

[@cuddlemegently]

Im surprised Pat wouldn't remember such a bad ass super hype mega villain name like Tyson Fury.

[@tsarzamancorpdna]

I wonder if woolie saw the wilder vs fury fight

[@seriousbusiness47]

17776, (or What Football Will Look Like in the Future) is a great little read/watch/etc. that has a lot of fun, goofy stuff about wild changes to american football. you don't even have to like football. you don't have to like it, hate it, or feel nothing about football, because this is the perfect future of football.

[@Kitchcube]

I followed the 17776 rabbit hole to all of Jon Bois stuff, Pretty Good and ChartParty specifically. And now I think I'm into sports statistics?

[@Fjarhultian]

Woolie's "it should be allowed if it helps you win" seems Pat-like.

[@Bigbrawler72]

I remember reading in one of the Harry Potter books that catching the snitch ends the match and some pro quiditch game lasted like 2 days or something like that because they just couldn't catch it.

[@aatired7307]

There's actually an extended universe book written by Rowling about Quidditch that says before the timer was added to the game the games would last for days regularly because the only way for it to end was to catch the Snitch. The official world record for longest Quidditch match was multiple months long. Quidditch was Mutant League for wizards and that's why the Snitch makes no sense in modern games.

[@Bigbrawler72]

@@aatired7307 you're right it was months! But yeah the closest we have to snitch rules is baseball. I decided to watch what I thought was the last inning with my mother and the game ended up being 18 innings long. It was midnight when the game ended but I felt bad for east coast viewers. The bars and stuff were closing while the game was still on. It was like 3 am for them when the game ended.

[@aatired7307]

@@Bigbrawler72 Yeah I can see that. Although, I like to think of Quidditch as keep away plus hockey as opposed to soccer plus keep away as many people compare it to. It seems that the keep away is the main component to the game and it's more like hockey because it seems more like a blood sport. When people get horribly injured in quidditch it feels like that is a feature of the game rather than an externality.

[@LilAnonomus]

If there was no time limit then what was the point of the other balls?

[@Bigbrawler72]

@@LilAnonomus the snitch doesn't actually determine the winner. You get 150 points for catching it. If you're team is styling on the opponents and 160 to 0, suddenly they get the snitch and games over. You still win because the games 160 to 150 because you're team kept getting regular goals the whole time.

[@ripamoramee14]

KEEP GOING UNTIL ONE OF THEM DOES A DEMPSEY ROLL!!!!

[@DoctaDaKing]

Quidditch would literally be fixed completely if catching the Snitch didn’t award any points. It just ends the game.

[@elijahnakumura4375]

So Pat wants Megalobox. Thatll be the day i have to retire my gloves then fuck that lol

[@SwagBroPlays]

You can't spell PSYCHOPATH without PAT

[@3serio]

Woolz liked the complimentary yellow card idea

[@lunacysstraightjacket2121]

21"07 maaaan i've been watching a lot of Kuroko

[@tarnishedStruggler]

Megalo Box was fucking rad

[@andrei11dr]

So the moral of the story is that Pat loves to see real murder, as long as he wasn't involved. Man, don't get robbed around him, cause he'll just take a video of you getting stabbed, so he can enjoy it later!

[@maximumwill9208]

Have we all forgotten taser-ball? look it up

[@matthewcoyle4131]

I think the hammer doctor miiiiight break the Hippocratic Oath.

[@kingcoheed1208]

On the Quidditch thing Catching the Snitch Always ends the game and is the only way to end the game, but it doesn't guarantee the win as we see in book 4. You score 15 goals and the snitch is basically a come back mechanics

[@theoneandonlymichaelmccormick]

Kid Coheed 150, actually.

[@theoneandonlymichaelmccormick]

Jan Jappie Yeah, The Golden Snitch is worth 150 points and immediately ends the game, if I’m not mistaken.

[@theoneandonlymichaelmccormick]

Jan Jappie That’s fair. There are like...three different goals, each with different amounts of points, right?

[@lunacysstraightjacket2121]

that's like if people in movies thought properly instead of "let me go investigate noise"

[@KeroKaminaX]

GIVE THE CHILDREN KNIVES SAYS PAT

[@codafett]

I agree with everything Pat said.

[@Myrrith16]

So, in this episode the Best Friends WILDLY misunderstand Quidditch. Quidditch is a lot like baseball in that it can go on for fucking ever. The golden snitch being caught is how the game ends. It's also worth 150 points. So let's say your team has 0 and your opposing team has 160. They still win, even if you catch the Snitch. The reason Harry always wins by catching the Snitch is because he has good hand-eye coordination and is good at focusing on small moving objects. And because literal school children are so bad at the game that it becomes 'your team wins if you catch the snitch'.

[@MrGregory777]

Clinching is a legitimate strategy.

[@LilAnonomus]

But it's boring.

[@vistea1]

WHAT IS WITH THE TIGERS PAT?!

[@Umberman]

"A doctor with a hammer"

[@gruknarorcishwar-yerhereto8489]

Did pat just summarize the first instance of the Harlem Globe Totters

[@RipperTips]

Kawami when

[@ElricCantona82]

I can't believe they know K-1! such a shame what happened to them...loved seeing masato inexplicably getting a draw despite getting FUCKIN WRECKED by buakaw! Fuck, I need to read those Seanbaby articles again!

[@lunacysstraightjacket2121]

here's how you solve all boring-ness in all sports...anime-fy it

[@KingM1023]

Boxing needs a balance patch. Mayweather dominating with 10-0 match-ups. I'd say nerf his invincibility frames while clinching

[@ShardTown]

Only caring for “crowd pleasing” styles is what caused so many boxers to have cte. Look at Floyd’s uncle roger and Floyd’s dad for that matter and then wonder why he fights with a “boring” style.

[@SwagBroPlays]

At this point let's just make The Hunger Games

[@Waaaghtatic]

While these are all good ideas, it's important to note: This is pointless, because even they were legitimate bloodsports, none of them would watch them anyway, on account of them being sports.

[@patrickjohnson1649]

I once went to a White Sox/Yankees Game, and the Yankees got Fucking Killed, and I knew from the 2nd Inning, I can happen.

[@darkrequiem9133]

Why don't we just make Blitzball a thing?

[@PropaneWP]

Underwater rugby is a thing. But you can't kick or throw a ball underwater, because the laws of physics and hydrodynamics in particular exists.

[@Parere_Pare]

Blood bowl irl.........

[@oradrive745]

I love woolies shirt I only have one JoJo shirt thats just the phantom blood cast but I'd like to have a jotaro or a star platinum shirt

[@coolboyyo654]

Women's soccer > Men's soccer They actually score and shit and it's great.

[@RainDaemonic]

and lose to high school boys

[@JackOfen]

Well of course. Women can score whenever they want and men have to work hard to even score once

[@just_matt214]

5-Soccer > 11-Soccer The game actually doesn't stall and the pitch is smaller.

[@nickram321]

9:04

[@theprofesionalist7927]

Okay so I still think Pat makes a great point because blood sports are great, would be so fun to watch, and here's how you can make them work. Since people will probably only be able to last 5 years without getting injured past the point of no return everyone should paid 5 times as much as they usually get paid so that they can at least get 25 years worth of pay in exchange for getting super injured and killed. Not only that, but as long as they keep playing past 5 years they'll still keep getting paid this way as an incentive. Will most athletes die; yes, but they'll want to because of the fame, glory, and fortune that they can earn for them and their families; just like in the good old times of Rome.

[@amaizeing.dumbass5123]

but the fighters already try do that, but they sometimes dosen't have the abilities to do good inversions, something that is exploited by everyone in the sport except for the fighter's familiy

[@UNLebanon]

How to make soccer better: Make it into Rocket League.

[@DrHixPhD]

"Floyd Mayweather is the shittiest boxer to watch ever" - man who's only heard of him through other people talking about MayPac He admitted he DKSAB, he doesn't need to prove it

[@chunkanpony]

In the recent Tyson Fury V Deontay Wilder boxing match, Tyson was knocked pretty much out, not down, out, in a late round. Then proceeds to get back up, carry on fighting, and pull a draw in the match.

[@KoiNoYokan37]

"Pulled a draw" he was fucking robbed mate

[@chunkanpony]

Koi No Yokan oh for sure. But given that fucked up judging, I’m surprised he didn’t end up losing. He definitely deserved a win.

[@N_Moli]

No blitzball? No watch. Simple as that.

[@treetheoak8313]

@pat if you wanna watch entertaining clinchers in boxing look no further than Roberto Duran. For anyone on this platform look up the "modern martial artist" breakdown of Roberto Duran.

[@Whitebeardcrewmate]

Wilder vs. Fury was an incredible fight. Shame about the judges though

[@WindowsRive]

fucking GOLF needs new rules

[@TactlessC]

If you guys ever thought Pat wasn't an ADHD addled Boomer who needs to fucking retire, then look no further than him thinking rules in sports are made cause they're boring for the audience and not because PLAYERS, the people actually being paid to play the sport, find the exploitation unfair. If that were true Football would still have god damn touchdown celebrations.

[@AlexAndriy1995]

i'm not a fan but football is fun...I'm from europe, surprise

[@jcace13]

As a European who couldn’t find football/soccer any more dull I’m all for causing the injuries if they are faked.

[@Wolfclaw]

There should be a real world martial arts tournament like in Dragonball, not just karate matches.

[@JackOfen]

Hell yeah! We need more three eyed guys that can multiply and guys that marry a woman when they beat her up. Also more green demons that blow up the entire place and god taking possesion of a human to fight demons! That would be hype af!

[@a.rheser8181]

@@JackOfen also guys that smell so bad that the only way to win is to NOT have a nose. Guys growing two extra arms. Cyborgs that shoot you with lasers. Blonde evil guys teleporting into the match killing the audience. The hypest shit.