Friendly Newfoundlanders vs. Grumpy Locals

[@mark_royle_newfoundland]

Thanks for watching this video. This is a topic that I think about a lot. I believe that Newfoundlanders are largely - and genuinely - friendly people... but we can be pretty terrible to each other. Maybe none of this is actually unique to Newfoundland and Newfoundlanders, but both sides of the coin are pretty noticeable here. What has your experience been?

[@Jayderritchey]

My partner and I moved to Newfoundland in the summer of 2022, and we absolutely love it here. I do find the Newfoundland flavour of friendliness to be difficult to navigate at times. When I go walking on trails, almost everyone I pass will nod or say hello, and people I've met but might not know that well are much more inclined to stop me for a chat in the grocery store than back where I'm from, where you pretty much ignore anyone you didn't make plans to see lol But I found making friends very difficult unless I took a lot of initiative; in almost all cases, I needed to offer invitations to coffee or supper first and keep offering after, I needed to be the person who said, "hey, let's meet up sometime," I needed to really put myself out there in ways that didn't feel reciprocal until after a fair bit of time, and be persistent to a degree that would have been rude where I grew up. But now these same people treat me like family and are always looking for ways to make me feel included and welcome, and the friendships I've made since being here are all very fulfilling and warm.

[@pipes8273]

Moved here with my wife a few years ago. We’ve had a mixed experience when it comes to the social landscape of this place. Our neighbors never welcomed us but to be fair it was on the tail of the pandemic. I think people were still scared. One interesting experience was when I hit a moose. When people stopped while I waited for first responders they seemed only concerned about where the moose was and not whether I was ok. We were definitely NOT welcomed as newcomers but over time we’ve met some very friendly locals. It’s strange though that we’ve never once been invited by locals for dinner. Only other transplants have invited us into their homes. Other CFA’s have become our core friends. We’ve created some very good community primarily with other newcomers. I think it is complex Mark. I don’t think our town is representative of all rural Newfoundland. When we were visiting people were way more welcoming! I wonder if locals get scared when we stay because they assume we are going to try to change things or have a say on local topics. This is a fascinating topic. I wonder if the people interviews are sharing their true experiences. Word travels fast if you say something critical publicly. Well done Mark! Keep the conversation going!

[@mark_royle_newfoundland]

I won't ask where you are specifically because I know that can cause a big problem for you but I can say that every one of the people in this video live in the St. John's area. I know each of these people on a personal level and I believe they are being sincere but I bet they were expressing the best side of their experience in their interviews. They surely must have also experienced some unfriendliness too, but in all of their cases they have people from their respective communities to rely on close by if/when they need a friend. I think the problem that you talk about with your own experience is very real, and very common. And maybe more pronounced in smaller communities around the island.

[@PeggyMF2]

I've been here 9 years (in St. John's) and knew that the locals had accepted me when they started to be rude about my opinions. "Well, that's one way to think about it." said in a sarcastic tone. They know that I'm a Newfoundlander By Choice not just a Come From Away who will go away again. One man asked me directly when I was going to move home. I replied that I was home, looking confused (although knowing that he was using it in the Newfoundlander way as 'where your family came from'). I said I was never going to move back to the mainland and that I'll die here. He was so confused! I use 'home' to mean where my heart is. Even though there are a fair number of small minded people here THIS is where my heart is! Thanks, Mark, fabulous topic!

[@mark_royle_newfoundland]

Loves it!

[@musingwithreba9667]

I just moved to a small bay town in Newfoundland from Toronto in August this year (2024). When people meet me, they immediately ask me where I'm from, and then say "why da fu.. did you move HERE?" I needed quiet, Toronto is too moisy and smelly and peopley 😝 I now work part-time in one of the grocery stores, and meet all kinds of people. Most are friendly, some are grumpy. But grocery shopping isn't very fun these days, and we cashiers often get the brunt of the sticker shock frustration. My neighbours I find a bit strange. The road I live on is named after a family, and they're all still here. All but one house on the road besides me, are family, (6 or 7 houses) and they NEVER talk to each other! If I'm taking to one of my neighbours, and mention I was talking to their cousin the other day, I usually get a scowl. I'd surely love to know the story, but I'm afraid to ask! 😂 I grew up in small-town Ontario, just north of the city, and a lot of what you said fits with my own experience there. I grew up in a poor area that had a reputation because of bank robbers and drug dealers, so anyone who lived there was painted with that very wide brush. Particularly by the folks in town where we had to go to school, and do our shopping etc...I still get sideways looks from people in Ontario when I say where I grew up. Oh well.

[@mark_royle_newfoundland]

Thanks so much for adding that to the conversation. I can talk about the topic, and I can talk with people about the topic, but it's great to see people I never met before like yourself jumping in to share your thoughts too. Thank you ☺️

[@PeggyMF2]

I love to say I'm FROM Toronto and have no intention of moving back. I love to see Newffoundlanders' incredulous reactions. Doesn't everybody want to be home? Yes and some people 'home' is not where your family came from!

[@musingwithreba9667]

@PeggyMF2 I've met people here who just moved back from Ontario who are originally from NL, and most are glad to be home. One of them said she can't wait to move back to Ontario! She lived there 20+ years, moved here, now wants to go back. 🤷‍♀️

[@thanksgreenfield7365]

Second time to listen so appreciate the reality of this love em all like most Canadians nice ❤

[@pipes8273]

Yes Mark! Some of the locals are brutal with each other! Yes! I have also found I cannot critique anything publicly. And there are stories of newcomers being ostracized by the community. Often the outport folks drop their pejorative comments about Townies. There is even competition and nastiness with towns that are close by. It’s a huge struggle for locals to collaborate and get ahead together. It does seem like they always need to step on someone else to get ahead. It’s really odd.

[@mark_royle_newfoundland]

This is a thing, and it sucks. We can be the most friendly and warm people on the planet, but we can also be the coldest, most jealous crabs in the barrel

[@andrewhayes88]

Kingsley from the first part of this video is SPOT ON about his version of friendly is different than ours. I am a driving Instructor here in the metro region and we have seen a massive increase of International people trying to get their licenses in the last 2-3 years. I had this one woman fairly recently who paid a lot of money to get her training and such and when I was trying to teach her something or possibly correct her on something, it felt like she didn't care for what I had to say and acted very stubborn. However, it was the exact opposite. She learned, she improved and took all of my advise, but there was a point that I almost got offended that she reacted, to me, negatively. It was just her culture, part of her overall personality and she assured me she wasn't being stubborn or anything liked it seemed she was.

[@mark_royle_newfoundland]

I spoke with Kingsley for about an hour that day and this was definitely my favorite part of the conversation. He was reflecting on his own experience of course, and how he was able to start feeling more comfortable in Newfoundland, but I honestly don't think I ever considered what he was saying until I heard him say that.

[@codraven57]

There are so many aspects to this topic......I think you covered very well Mark......good one.

[@7966016]

Great video, Mark! I moved here 4 years ago with my family, and my experience has been very positive with a couple of exceptions! Before moving here, I visited the island yearly, and the people were always friendly. Since moving here, it's been a struggle to break into friendship circles! There is definitely a noticeable difference in how people interact with visitors vs. come from away people, I almost feel a resentment. The very same people who were friendly dont even say hello when you see them, very hard to understand, maybe its just me, lol! Although I have met a couple of good friends who are Newfoundlanders who lived abroad and are amazing people, not to say the others aren't, just different! It seems that the Nefoundlanders that have lived abroad are more open to outsiders and are more open to extending their circle! After saying all that, I love this place and wouldn't want to live anywhere else in the world! I will take your advice and put myself out there more and see if that helps! Thanks!

[@mark_royle_newfoundland]

I love to see that. It isn't easy to move anywhere, but when you come to a place for a reputation for friendliness, but you find small clique-y communities it is even harder to adjust because expectations don't meet the reality. I hope you keep loving this place in any case!

[@PeggyMF2]

I have lived in six different places and every move was difficult. Social circles are hard to get into and you have to push yourself out there to make friends. This happens everywhere. It's a lot of emotional work. I found the hard part is after the people around me figure out that I'm staying so they're going to have to get along with me for years 😄

[@Glosslipline]

As. a Brit who lived in and around St John’s for nine years, I can say everyone I came into contact with was very gracious and kind to a stranger. Maybe it could have been because I was married to a Canadian; I don’t know. I do know I loved Newfoundland and the people. ❤ (PS . My name’s Paul Russell. 😂 Got an ad free account online, Mark.)

[@mark_royle_newfoundland]

Hi Paul. For me, this is what makes the topic so fascinating. Everyone has their own experience with friendliness in Newfoundland, and the stories of how people feel here whether they are visiting or living here can be so different. My own experience as a born and raised Newfoundlander is mixed, but like you, I still love Newfoundland and its people (well, most of its people haha)

[@aircanuck]

Spot on Mark, you continue to guide my way in this new place!

[@mark_royle_newfoundland]

Glad to be of service!

[@Bradlovestravel]

Excellent video Mark!

[@mark_royle_newfoundland]

Thank you Brad

[@thegrandbankrovers8543]

Nailed it, Mark. Merry Christmas to you and your family, Buddy!

[@mark_royle_newfoundland]

Thanks for always coming back and watching these videos buddy! And Merry Christmas to you and your family too!

[@RyanSheppard-tq4pg]

Friendliness is universal and NL friendliness is not all lip salad.

[@moniqueball3559]

As always a great video . Thank you for the insight to the province that intrigues me so much.

[@mark_royle_newfoundland]

Thanks Monique!

[@bhangg_high]

A great way to wrap up the year, Mark! I look forward to watching this video with my wife. Much love brother. Bruce.

[@mark_royle_newfoundland]

I hope you both enjoy the video! Thanks for all the support this year my friend.

[@peterdaigle4772]

Great vid, Mark. Well done

[@mark_royle_newfoundland]

Thanks Peter!

[@G.I.N.N]

NFLD has a reputation of being " Friendly " However it stems from mainlanders / tourists....I've lived all over Canada....I don't say I'm from NFLD....If a conversation arises and NFLD is brought up....Almost every person has the same compliment " Newfies are the best " " So friendly " ....Chances are you'll run into a Newfie / Newfoundlander anywhere in Canada and beyond....If you've lived in NFLD ...Born and raised..Your perspective might be different. It has its good and bad....as does every province. The smaller towns have a cluster of old school Newfoundlanders....And it has Newfies....Both are different. It has a dark underbelly ....amongst the locals....Tourist / Mainlanders might not be exposed to it. Locals can treat eachother like crap ...Alot of drama and addiction. However for the most part its a great Province....My uncle has alway said " NFLD has too many Newfies , Not enough Newfoundlanders " He's 76 yrs old Born and raised in NFLD.

[@boredofcanada]

The "friendly Newfoundlander" thing is just a CBC angle. People on the island are friendly until you stand your ground then they resort to the group to ostracize you. Friendly my arse.