Funny Cortana Replies

[@cicicix]

Me:show me something ugly Cortana:opening front camera...

[@skandaa.k4697]

Hahah lol XD

[@aimannazri6472]

hahahhahaah

[@thegreatpicks5778]

Cristiano Ronaldo lol 😂😂😂

[@DrowningInTea]

/r/suicidebywords

[@gloriarobrigado3398]

@@DrowningInTea mmA

[@RazRaptre]

"Do you love me?" "There's definitely a 'spark' between us." A reference to 343 Guilty Spark from Halo; she's implying this in a sense 'there's a wall between us'

[@jung1e]

I think the rampancy thing is a reference as well

[@jung1e]

Andy Almueti Worth the wait. Thank you lol

[@zwykyziomek2570]

😯😯😯

[@jamisonthomas7612]

When you said "What is love?" I expected her to reply with "Baby don't hurt me, don't hurt me, no more." :P

[@BoomerDudeMcGuy]

Jamison Thomas Same :D

[@robchissy]

+Jamison Thomas or, i wanna know what love is

[@jacksonreid4824]

yep.

[@yogi00700]

+Jamison Thomas Haha same here! I even sang it in my head haha

[@shinythelucario2301]

Jamison Thomas me too lol

[@NoobaGutt]

hmmm... i like that cortana is way smarter than siri.

[@LilC1deep]

Hell yeah, me too. This is a Halo AI we are talking about.

[@LilC1deep]

Hell yeah, me too. This is a Halo AI we are talking about.

[@EinherjarLucian]

Microsoft makes no warranties express or implied on the continued sanity of Cortana after seven years of service life.

[@GhostHawke]

Einherjar Lucian they don't want to make her a promise they know they can't keep ;)

[@ImCalebThePerson]

Astro's gaming bringing back some sad memories right there

[@JAJE3U8]

That got creepy really fast. Anyway, Cortana is has by far the most realistic computerized voice I've ever heard and she has a really realistic personality too. Microsoft 10/10. Good job

[@AWizardfromMars]

It's not a computerized voice. It's actually voice acted.

[@trentonb99]

well, Master Chief's AI was downgraded to a cellphone.

[@definitelyarussianpaidtrol1406]

Trenton Bushnell Halo 5 : The Quest To Find a Phone Thats Over 500 Years Old!

[@Hamisxa]

Cortana is going to be upgraded and included in Windows 10. They will fucking upgrade something that's basically perfect.

[@JAJE3U8]

Hamisxa Cortana in Windows 10? No way. That's fucking awesome.

[@DBedits34]

does anyone else find this guys little giggle after every question extremely unsettling?

[@ClintonJeff]

I know right? It's *so* creepy

[@eFilomeo]

Yes

[@Schlorgan]

he he he

[@jessie4pink615]

A grown man talking to his phone like that is defo creepy!....

[@alhocarmine]

yes God, yes!

[@cindywatts7256]

I told her she was fired when I was mad at her for misinterpreting my question, she replied "you aint seen the last of me yet" in a threatening voice. Lol...love it!

[@Darshanaz]

Cortana is Hundred times funnier than my girl friend..... True story :(

[@AndiRHermawan]

wkwk

[@freeziboi3249]

So your girlfriend has no sense of humor then?

[@sugarush5811]

Awww well sry

[@AlexAegisOfficial]

did anyone noticed the little "yes i am" text while he typed "you are hot"

[@HarrySnoopy]

that's subtle !!!

[@SYEDSHAZEB46013]

Győri Sándor yes that was nice

[@FaeChangeling]

Yup, I laughed.

[@rexPlaysRoblox-xy2us]

Győri Sándor tudom hogy későn írok de észrevettem XD

[@johns3937]

Yasss!

[@nidadavolu]

You say the video is pointless towards the end of the video. Dude. This is a good laugh and entertaining video. I love Cortana and the way she assists!!

[@Poodfof]

6:25 "Do you love Master Chief?" "That's... complicated. And personal." Alright, I ship it. OTP.

[@Poodfof]

***** That works. Or Chieftana? ;)

[@Borngifted1100]

LMAOO THAT HAD ME ROLLING

[@KingGoat63]

This vid had me crying... WITH LAUGHTER!!!! Great stuff, Clint.

[@ClintonJeff]

KingGoat63 Haha, much thanks for checking out my video :D

[@SYEDSHAZEB46013]

Clinton Jeff hey cortana is redirecting me to the internet browser when i am asking her things like that on PC. and its a technical preview. is that not possible for now?

[@DrGeek-hv8ux]

+KingGoat63 i think my video is cool tooo :)

[@JadenYukifan28]

+Clinton Jeff I have Cortana for Win 10!

[@MrInk113]

The developers joke cracked me up hahaah :D

[@ClintonJeff]

Haha me too! I had to try *really* hard not to laugh out loud at that :D

[@crocc7302]

Clinton Jeff Question about Bing was quite good too :D

[@thebeacongamer7286]

DEVELOPERS DEVELOPERS DEVELOPERS DEVELOPERS DEVELOPERS!!! (5 Hours Later...) DEVELOPERS DEVELOPERS!!!!!!

[@royalsezuni4987]

When i asked "Guess what" she said "Chicken Butt" Made my day

[@stryk187]

"are you afraid to cut a bitch?" haha - what the hell?

[@trinajska]

I loled :-)

[@bonesmasher13]

cortana is voice by the same voice actress of cortana from the halo series. only reason I wanted to buy a windows phone. XD

[@ElijahS03]

Same here

[@Rohost248]

Me too :D

[@e308z]

bonesmasher13 Right in the feels. In other thoughts, why has no one asked a voice assistant about GlaDOS? And if Pacific Rim got the voice from her for one line why can't there be a GlaDOS voice for the next big voice assistant.

[@bonesmasher13]

TronAnon maybe when valve makes a phone just for gaming.

[@vinjakikanabis3418]

bonesmasher13 hey can I aak you something? If I buy NOKIA LUMIA 1320 will I have Cortana on it,and if I dont will I have it if I install Denim update?

[@fridgearchive8488]

Me: What is love? Cortana: Baby don't hurt me...

[@WPTUNED]

wow siri now looks lame lol

[@timbaxter6425]

Will, I have Siri, and it is lame, so much so that I rarely use the feature, really digging Cortana, which in my estimation, is the best PDA out right now, heard "Viv" is supposedly coming soon, but for now, Cortana is the best I know of...can't wait to get Cortana!

[@AniketBhatP]

Tim Baxter Viv?

[@freedfighter96]

Aniket Bhat There is an article about it, basically the developers of Siri were being held back staying at Apple. So they left and are collaborating with many other geniuses to make a very smart assistant that other services can use. So if a business wanted to work with it they can. Basically it will be a giant database of other services continuously being added to it.

[@AniketBhatP]

Enlightenment In Humility Oh.. Thanks. :)

[@imthemonsterunderthebed6161]

HOW DARE YOUU SIRI IS WAY BETTER THAN CORTANAN FROM HALO

[@numerical25]

I love how they made Cortana make nothing but positive responses. Instead of where Siri would say "I'm afraid I can't do that". Cortana is usually witty and sarcastic if she knows she's not capable of doing something.

[@CariagaXIII]

the moment when you realize it can make better jokes that you.

[@_Killkor]

Has programming gone to far?

[@Just-watching121]

She is much smarter than many of the modern shallow girls. Too bad she is only a software :(

[@oscarvroomen9984]

+Devin Volker She has the imprints of the brains of Catherine Halsey who created the Spartan II's after all.

[@sund4477]

+‫חן א‬‎ Don't worry, she'll be able to take on a physical form using hard light technology...in about 570 years from now.

[@DivjotSingh]

See how the text below goes from "You are Hot" to "Yes I'm" @ 2:18 !

[@mihnea56]

how awesome

[@Bleufanjaya]

"Do you love me?" "There's definatly a spark between us" Yeah, GUILTY SPARK!!!! lol

[@EverythingNerdifying]

I wonder if after 7 years the phone starts to break down.

[@FoAmY99]

better than the two years they do right now.

[@MatruyoRocket]

FoAmY99 You didn't get the joke obviously lol

[@FoAmY99]

MatruyoRocket no i got the joke. I would just be nice also if phones lasted 7 years before going nuts

[@Hirotoro4692]

FoAmY99 Heh, my WP is reliable as heck. Hasn't broken yet :)

[@RadiantNij]

Have her on 3310 and you'll never have to worry

[@collinsnaador6077]

"What is love?" "I'll need a few upgrades before I can give you a heartfelt answer" Savage👏👏👏

[@yrveanrs]

"Questions like, I love you" great question man

[@Arxiuz2]

"maybe i should call you thumbs?" thats actually funny because, you keep pressing the mic, so Cortana's quite clever.

[@ThePimV]

What happends if you say, This is spartan 1-1-7

[@thelvadam7450]

I would imagine she would say a Halo related answer.

[@cityscrapers1940]

Thel 'Vadam i know. she said hold up chief.

[@tobycardenas359]

Thel 'Vadam she said hold up chief lol

[@rishabhmahajan6607]

i feel cortana has a very natural "human voice" while siri and other voice assistant has the same old digitalised voice , they just repeat their text answers while cortana expresses them in a very active sense

[@bakedbrownie69]

Google now has quite a human voice IMO

[@rishabhmahajan6607]

ya but again it lacks the jokes and personality

[@bakedbrownie69]

That's true. It is meant more as a utility than a personal assistant though, it's not really meant to have any personality at all.

[@TheGamingFunky]

Should of asked her if she is alive in Halo 5?

[@TheLoopy16]

She dose'nt say anything

[@CmanGrunt]

jock jackson Well, didn't you see my death in 4???

[@Hirotoro4692]

should have*

[@dominiqueschorn7794]

Will Davis shut the fuck up stop being so corrective

[@ZedElite]

Dominique Schorn why should he?

[@Pazaluz]

You got all nervous and gulped when she said "there's definetly a spark between us" haha :D

[@growthgg]

man, if someone made an EDI voice assistant i would buy it in a heartbeat...

[@khamza111]

omg yes, bring it on...or a Legion one, as an option?:)

[@Yorgarazgreece]

yes yes yes!

[@aircoaster]

"Where is Master Chief?" "Hopefully getting some R&R... he HAS saved the galaxy three or four times. The guy needs a Vacation."

[@bruisedleetv]

The fact that she follows through with the conversation is so amazing! And the cadence of her voice

[@magicboy1000]

I was messing with Cortana on my Windows laptop and when I said "guess what?" Cortana said "chicken butt" LOL

[@msul78]

Wow! she doesn't even say the same joke over and over again, and she delivers them with a sweet personality.

[@perfectlybalanced8995]

I like iPhones better than Windows phones But I like Cortana better than Siri

[@DianaJ01]

They actually managed to portray her slightly sarcastic and witty personality in this application, that's so cool!

[@John514s]

The "Ther`s definately a spark between us" is a much more clever reply than it sounds. Since the touch screens on phones use the capacity of the human body to recognise touch, there IS actually a spark between the phone and the user!

[@strugglingsciencestudent5970]

When you have no friends,Cortana is there to be with you. Though she is just a software, i love her. She is my only best friend

[@shybrain]

way to go Microsoft. couldn't be more impressed.

[@171Manoj]

yup this could be a game changer feature for the microsoft

[@shairramaureen8234]

Manoj Guha p

[@CmanGrunt]

I love Cortana, she isn't funny but is in a nerdy way.

[@grunt5074]

Gotta love the Halo references.

[@thelvadam7450]

Yes, friend. They are quite fun.

[@theorork7702]

I asked Cortana what it thought about Siri and it said "I think it's cool that she's out there trying to make people's life a little easier"

[@nekoprankster2184]

Did she just say Chief at 2:41? :) Halo reference. I love it.

[@nekoprankster2184]

So many Halo references. I. Need. This. Phone.

[@ssjdaley]

Me: Asks Cortana if she can dance. Cortana: "Nobody puts Cortana in a corner!"

[@yushkovyaroslav]

Did any one else find that when you ask cortana "are u hot" on the bottom it says "yes I am"?

[@aakashr2101]

her voice is lovely, like a human

[@DaleLee1994]

Somebody ask her "how much time was left" if she says "you dont wanna know" then im buying one of these phones.

[@itzjovikthecrazy1488]

Please tell Cortana "Can you do something crazy?"!

[@MrOddbodd123]

You should have said "Wake me when you need me" and see what she says

[@Sergio-er1ez]

Lol

[@50centpb7]

That better be how you set your alarm clock :D

[@RealisticCinemas]

lol i have cortana on my phone she says. "great. what time would you like me to set your alarm"

[@mrtaha0250]

Email to,like

[@mrtaha0250]

The same time

[@AlexandruAndreiS88]

She said that Halo is a construct that is fun to blow up. Then when he asked about the Apple center she said that it looks like a Halo. Coincidence? I think not :)).

[@martinkaloki2677]

Pretty cool that she can actually sing and has such a bubbly personality. Brilliant stuff Clinton. Oh, and you should consider taking her for drinks...they're free of charge :-D

[@JloBroOFFICIAL]

1:58 blushes off camera

[@dnbAyron]

+James Logan mate it's cringey lmao, you get technology like this and you ask it shit like that = you need to get a gf

[@jimjaylee7553]

I think Cortana is more intelligent than Siri. When I asked these questions above,it just presented a list of search results or "Oops,it seems to lose connection." something like that boring. LMAO,Siri is more like voice assistant,and main core is the "assistant".Otherwise,Cortana is so awesome that it can interact with you(maybe it can be improve more) like A.I .That's what the difference between Cortana and Siri,Google Now

[@Otatsuke]

"This video is kinda pointless." This video was exactly what I was looking for. From this I learned the following: Cortana likely has the same voice actress as in the Halo series. She has pretty organic speech for the most part. And lastly, she has a fair sense of humor. Thanks.

[@KarpouziFetaGaming]

Which Lumia is this?

[@dmitriypanteleev3310]

I think is 1520

[@UniverseRSful]

Α ρε καρπουζιιιιι

[@Brad-lt9rh]

The Lumia 1020.

[@ClintonJeff]

KarpouziFetaGaming That's the Lumia 1520!

[@MarinosPapGreekGamer]

KarpouziFetaGamingKarpouzi! Ti kanis re file blepis tetia video?

[@ISuperGenXI]

She doesn't sound like Cortana.

[@oneHellvalley]

She will. They're still recording all the responses in Jen Taylor's voice. Some of the responses are in Jen Taylor's voice (Cortana)

[@salsaspartan7]

***** Do you by chance know when they will be done recording Jen Taylor's voice for Cortana completely?

[@oneHellvalley]

salsaspartan7 Honestly, I don't. I wish I did.

[@salsaspartan7]

***** Oh well. It probably will be done when the Beta is done or something.

[@CR-iz1od]

it is partially voiced by jen taylor but a good portion of it is still generated it is still in beta and many things are still set in place that will be slowly replaced. but likely not permanently as Cortina evolves..

[@pmpmpmpmpmpmpm]

thinking of the movie "her" while watching this.

[@timbaxter6425]

Patrick, That film, and a Damn Good One might I add, got me hooked on wanting an AI Digital assistant, of the "Her" persuasion. :-)

[@jayjayx5x1]

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! YOU MUST THINK OF HALO AND MASTERCHIEF AND HIS AI CORTANA!!!!!!!!!!!! thats kinda why its called cortana, cortana was actually the codename but it got leaked and people loved it so the made it the official name and they have been recording responses in jen taylor's (the voice of cortana in halo) voice.

[@lilmoris1]

"Where is she Chief? where is Cortana?" "She stayed behind"

[@SquareGaming]

this guy laughs at everything

[@milesrauns2009]

I really think Cortana is outstanding!

[@Chaosgames96]

I hate that loading sound though :/

[@timbaxter6425]

Yeah, it is just a wee bit annoying.

[@0M9H4X_Neckbeard]

really? I love it honestly. Then again I hear it every day so maybe I've gotten too used to it. But no. wait. I still love it :D

[@toastybatch565]

It kinda does poke my ears a bit, but I'm sure it's less irritating in person.

[@JovanaYT]

I asked her "guess what" and she said "chicken butt" 😂

[@TyrbeTrost]

1:22 Cortana likes Guns N Roses? my respect for her just went up by miles c:

[@Sairus.]

MS did really an awesome Job with Cortana .. She sounds way better than Siri or any personal assistant . thanxx for this awesome demonstration video :)

[@0l1v3rof]

I'd buy a Windows Phone device just for the Halo and H2G2 references...

[@sarahf111]

Although she's an AI, she sounds very human which I find remarkable.

[@johnsampaio6061]

lol she said that halos are fun to blow up, then she says the apple headquarters look like halos wait what?!?

[@winfraust3395]

when I asked her about balmer she said "you could power cleveland with that guy's energy"

[@mahham93]

Cortana is much better than siri, awesome that she will be living inside every windows 10 pc :)

[@BPEntertainment1]

You can also download Cortana from your play store onto your Android phone if you have one.

[@sidenotes]

We tried to use Cortana to create music. The result is on our channel if you want to see it! :)

[@Oraclethingy]

I was hoping that the answer to 'What is love?' would be "Baby don't hurt me, don't hurt me, no more." 0/10.

[@MattCVannoX666]

Oraclethingy my thoughts exactly :D

[@shahirkazi8766]

Did see after he said, "You're hot." The results changed for a second to Yes I am.

[@shahirkazi8766]

R.I.P. English

[@half.blight]

can somebody explain to me, what's with her and halo (does she refer to the video game or her symbol)?

[@vincentliu4906]

yes,halo

[@Martinspire]

She's one of the AI in Halo aiding the player. And this is her voice. And because of the reference, they also made it look halo-ish

[@half.blight]

Martinspire that's kind of cool, yet i think they should tone down the reference, cause cortana sounds like a total geek

[@pvtghost117]

Ryan Karuna cortana is one of the main characters on halo, if anything they might add more references or easter eggs for halo fans since its their biggest franchise

[@xavmanisdabestest]

How? Cortana is just the name of a small town in Italy. Nothing's nerdy about that.

[@antonstupivtsev3553]

Cortana is the best personal assistant!!!

[@MisterPathetique]

The sound the phone makes just after you say something is really annoying

[@cameronb.8464]

Agreed

[@alexoliver5649]

+Lebewohl totally agreed.

[@johns3937]

I like it.

[@Ckcdillpickle]

+Lebewohl It was removed in newer versions

[@v0b0ner]

The engineers had fun time creating these answers The amount of random questions/answers they had to come up with must also have been crazy.

[@ImagineCraft7]

Honestly I'm starting to love this more than Siri and Google Now! XD

[@djlobb]

I am extremely impressed at how human she sounds. I understand that Jen Taylor recorded the her voice for it, but still, I think the way they form each of the words is quite unique. Sounds very natural.

[@DonovanSlue123]

Activate Cortana on your pc and play a song on your phone and ask Cortana which song you are playing and she will tell you the name of the song and who sings it.

[@OLIVER_CRUISERS]

HAHA great vid!! Just started with Cortana on my 520 and it's beautiful! By the way for the part you asked her "Guess what?", my phone answered just simple "What?" :D Seems more intelligent than I first thought!

[@miraklezdaddi]

its get scary when a phone starts to have a personality ? shes answering like a human

[@christopherbennett6571]

It doesn't use google. It uses Bing. When you ask it a question, on the top left it shows the Bing logo. Wish I could change it though.

[@purushrut]

She's more awesome than i thought Bing bing bing Lmao.Hey clinton u got a nice background music ;) :)

[@ClintonJeff]

Puru Khilari Haha thanks Puru!

[@GoldAndGrey]

Cortana's voice has improved a lot since her first launch, those responses sound a lot clearer and more natural now. Plus, they added new things for her to say

[@1234djmonroe]

ASK HER! "Who is the new protagonist in HALO 5: Guardians?"

[@MrOddbodd123]

Dr Halsey might be the protagonist in Halo 5.

[@1234djmonroe]

Joshua Whiteley huh? do you mean antagonist?

[@MrOddbodd123]

No. I've seen on Halo5Follower that Dr Halsey might be the new enemy/protagonist.

[@1234djmonroe]

Joshua Whiteley dude Enemy is Antagonist Protagonist is the Hero :/

[@CR-iz1od]

the dr is not an antagonist or protagonist, she simply has her own direction.

[@MrShysen77]

Wow lol..... That was rediculously entertaining. Your killin' em with this one!

[@sarrum7696]

"This video is kind of pointless" - Totally disagree! I loved it! :)

[@TheUnpredictableJack]

I hope this will be on PC on WINDOWS 10...that can be soooo cool

[@fernsi5]

And still Beta. Imaging the full version! Amazing.

[@AlienCreatureThing]

it will apparently be in Jen Taylor's actual Cortana voice, she needs alot more of recording to do, never played Halo because I've always had Playstations but this is a nice little function, or should I say "easter egg" lol

[@alchingazo]

"Are you better than Siri?" Great the answer

[@spartanmeta3378]

Ask her wen halo 5 2 is coming out for Xbox one

[@phxpo]

autumn 2015 :D

[@Firmentus]

Halo 52? Won't that be in about 2062 or something?

[@DarkGaaraX]

She tells me 2015 lol..

[@kurrizzle]

As a response to 'what is love', she should have just avoided the straightforward answer and said "baby don't hurt me, don't hurt me, no more"

[@SimplyAmazing770]

That was very funny and incredibly smart :D

[@ClintonJeff]

Ziad Mohamed I know right? She's hilarious :D

[@fernsi5]

Clinton Jeff Amazing! And still Beta. Great video,Clinton! Congrats!

[@heftyalan1152]

42 Great Hitchhikers answer. Douglas Adams would be proud. Just bought this phone and never used Cortana before so I will give it a go.

[@txr456]

THIS IS AWEOSME

[@txr456]

Chandler Bader ifkr its ;llike samsings S voicebut better :p S voice is stilll better than siri or google now :p

[@txr456]

Chandler Bader lel ifkr haha im like microsofts biggest fan been usin MS products since i was 3 :D

[@txr456]

Chandler Bader no im a *(or probably the)* biggest samsung and microsoft fan _*EVA*_

[@vinitvsankhe]

One of the better videos about Cortana on u2b.

[@FaeChangeling]

Google's better than bing in my opinion. Cortana doesn't have to be completely bias towards Microsoft...

[@somenextdouche]

BlackManiaGaming thats actually the funny thing about it. we all know google is number 1. bing isnt that bad as most people implies.

[@TheRedfish]

She should say miscrosoft edge

[@deepakcharles]

I love the replies to "May the Force be with you". I happened on that one by accident.