Gen Z Bible stories are actually amazing

Check out Gen Z Bible Stories for more: / @gen.z.bible.stories
Asmongold Clips / Asmongold Reacts To: Gen Z Bible Stories
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[@straypaper]

... and so when Big J told the boys "one of yous gon murk me" and the bros be "fr fam? Say more"

[@lonewolfhero3526]

more like "someone here is sus"

[@togucvinw7]

Judas : I put that on your father it ain’t gon be me Big J !

[@sackwonder9269]

Mistah J

[@danielawesome36]

​@@lonewolfhero3526among us

[@ProtectorKelvin]

​​@@togucvinw7 You sure about that ma g

[@JudsonRadio]

As someone who grew up in the church and was well studied, this is a surprisingly biblically accurate translation.

[@goi4246]

Its an GG Translation you might say.

[@neo_child]

@@goi4246 You mean its a 💯💯💯🔥🔥🔥lit translation fam🔥🔥🔥💯💯💯

[@randomuserame]

Holy Bible (OG Fax Translation)

[@toddconnell6256]

Same here, I got a bible degree and this conveys the meaning pretty damn well

[@derpfluidvariant0916]

@@toddconnell6256 same here *To clarify, not the degree part. Just that it is accurate to the meaning as described to me from those at my church who do have degrees in it.

[@breezy831]

My Lord spittin facts

[@snickle1980]

Verily i say unto thee...I am the I am, and it Is what it Is. know on this day, that this is the truth and the reality, dood. _What. A. Day._

[@zachster2016]

I say unto thee no cap bros, I'm literally Him

[@thesocialmediagame]

@@zachster2016 here's your W sir, have a good day

[@mrchenz1371]

Amen my dudes

[@FirepowerFantasy]

​@@zachster2016The captial H is what does it

[@DatHoasi]

Could you imagine the Bible in zoomer language? It would go from book long to pamphlet long

[@user85937]

And it will still be too long for their attention span.

[@DatHoasi]

@@user85937 there’d be some subway surfer gameplay on the side attached to every book

[@LunatiqHigh]

ONG FR FR

[@snickle1980]

@@DatHoasi I immediately imagined an intricate medieval painting of a subway surfer on each page lol.

[@anubis9151]

Honestly, it would probably be a billion dollar idea to turn the bible, curan, etc into games, either god of war style, where you cruise through a story as a character and watch and get involved in the bloodshed, or more freestyle like MMORPG where the events happen like expansions and players play around them. Would probably be really good if well made, ngl.

[@cosas_de_gatos]

As a Christian I almost cried laughing watching this. I need to show this to my younger siblings lmao

[@cosas_de_gatos]

@user-ss2ve4ub2i ♥️

[@SanctusPaulus1962]

​@@pookie6659 Why are you describing yourself?

[@AR12YO]

You do know what lmao means right? 🤨

[@phamlenam.]

@@AR12YO and what's wrong with that ?

[@Grimnoire]

Licking my ass off

[@firestorm1088]

To be fair, a lot of the difficulty in understanding on religious and philosophical texts stems from how they use outdated language that would have made perfect sense at the time they were written.

[@luigimrlgaming9484]

@markstein2845More like the language was optimized to be shorter.

[@trueblueclue]

​@@luigimrlgaming9484 gen z lingo isn't optimized

[@luigimrlgaming9484]

@@trueblueclue For understanding? No. For speed? Yes. Although that’s not really what I’m talking about.

[@sakesaurus]

and for the people that wrote it. Jews in the roman empire

[@Transformers2Fan1]

Like how "thou" is actually a personal intimate form of "you"

[@dougsmalls5459]

Jesus is the largest influencer with over 1.5 billion followers

[@StuninRub]

Not as much as Muhammad.

[@dougsmalls5459]

Actually I was wrong. There are about 2.2 billion Christians in the world

[@wilkic2]

@@StuninRubmore than Muhammad

[@perlundgren7797]

He was also the first victim of cancel culture.

[@domerame5913]

should be enough to reclaim the kingdom of jerusalem

[@zigmus00A]

For anybody who thinks this is weird, I urge you to check out the "Pidgin Bible." It's the Bible, but in an English adjacent language that does not have equivalent phrases to modern English and is unintentionally hilarious. Such gems included: "He no-can-die" for "Immortal" and "Big-Boss-Man-in-the-Sky" for "God"

[@_Jay_Maker_]

Pidgin is a legitimately wild language. It's awesome. Yeah, it's funny, but don't forget that there's an entire society out there that speaks it. The BBC's news service in Pidgin is hilarious.

[@raketensven3127]

"Sky daddy" is the best for god imho.

[@Triunity4]

so...its not the bible

[@nicolaspeigne1429]

@@Triunity4 i guess your bible is in hebrew, or at least in latin

[@snickle1980]

"But in the Latin alphabet, Jehova begins with an i" @@nicolaspeigne1429

[@seymaple]

“Full time L taker” lmao

[@TheFlonn]

who`s an L taker? I'm not an eng native nor a zoomer...

[@user-ji1hb7wy8d]

​@@TheFlonn When someone loses a game, an argument or anything we say they "took an L". If you take an L all the time, you're a "full time L taker". Seymaple, the guy who wrote the comment you replied, is laughing because there was a moment in the video that the phrase "full time L taker" appeared in someone's face

[@TheFlonn]

@@user-ji1hb7wy8d cheers!

[@mr.slimeyt]

​@@user-ji1hb7wy8d um..you can just say L means Loser...or does L means different nowadays

[@user-ji1hb7wy8d]

@@mr.slimeyt They asked especifically about an L taker, so I wanted to be specific. But yeah, that works too and is pretty straight to the point

[@clutchhaze1036]

We have taken the Eternal L for many moons. The time has come for us to set off on a quest in search of the Eternal W.

[@dragonstorm_gaming]

Mf you are spitting too much facts, I tought it was bloodborne lore😂😂😂😂

[@Kopie0830]

Full cap

[@GlobalOutcast]

​@@dragonstorm_gaming the hunter waking up... finally achieving the enteral W

[@rafaeladvincula8119]

Note: This is based on the verses “Matthew 5:1-12” The Beatitudes. Introduction to the Sermon on the Mount 5 Now when Jesus saw the crowds, he went up on a mountainside and sat down. His disciples came to him, 2 and he began to teach them. The Beatitudes He said: 3 “Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven. 4 Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted. 5 Blessed are the meek, for they will inherit the earth. 6 Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, for they will be filled. 7 Blessed are the merciful, for they will be shown mercy. 8 Blessed are the pure in heart, for they will see God. 9 Blessed are the peacemakers, for they will be called children of God. 10 Blessed are those who are persecuted because of righteousness, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven. 11 “Blessed are you when people insult you, persecute you and falsely say all kinds of evil against you because of me. 12 Rejoice and be glad, because great is your reward in heaven, for in the same way they persecuted the prophets who were before you.

[@EnheTook50Benadryl]

Why are all the lines so right

[@thediodoin1000]

@@EnheTook50BenadrylStraight WORD from our God Almighty 🔥

[@sonnytag3720]

Thank you so much for this. No one provides a comparison to the OG.

[@danielsurvivor1372]

We need you or original TikTok channel to fully translate Bible into Gen Z speak frfr ong

[@tombrown5412]

Amen

[@PatrickWDunne]

"W to those who's spiritual fit is immaculate"

[@innovativedunce3706]

I'm your 100th like🎉!

[@SoundBubble]

Most of Gen Z won't even watch 20 seconds of this because there's no Subway Surfer in the background. And Gen Alpha already scrolled past before it started.

[@snickle1980]

So we basically have superpowers that the younglings don't? Thats not too shabby. Behold my attention span, ye' perky and weep.

[@vojtechstepanek7145]

It's still a shock to my millenial mind that Gen Alpha is something internet discourse has to consider now. And also how lacking in foresight whoever coined that term was. As if having an upcoming generation of people being called Betas for life is a perfectly good idea that can in no way go wrong.

[@snickle1980]

They'll have to hope that 20 years from now, the alpha/beta wildlife analogies have passed as a fad. Otherwise...yeah, that would be horrible. @@vojtechstepanek7145

[@MuantanamoMobile]

@@vojtechstepanek7145 terms change all the time, calling people B's is a recent phenomenon. In the past it was scrub, L'ser etc. So could have hanged by that time or been x-celled.

[@vojtechstepanek7145]

@@MuantanamoMobile It's as recent as 1932 or thereabouts and let's not forget that scrub, L, nerd are still in use while cuck(old) is having a resurgence. Aside from insults the only other area where humanity constantly innovates while refusing to leave the past behind is violence.

[@BuiHieuDong]

People who aren't used to Gen Z slangs: *He's speaking the language of god!*

[@Elphirein]

... if the gods were retarded.

[@exkiltersilva7483]

Oh I see what you did there

[@Post-Yap_Clarity]

Capitalize that G in God, my guy, for Jesus is the Top G

[@jesse2535]

I'm gen z but not a native speaker so those slangs were alien to me. The gen z slangs I might use are in my native tong and are mostly using league of legends lingo to convey day to day stuff.

[@Omega-uf7dy]

@@jesse2535I'm gen Z and can't understand gen Z slang even in my native language.

[@ToadstedCroaks]

As not Gen Z .. I understood this more than the actual bible verses.

[@KachZz]

gen z is not an age, it's a state of mind.

[@RichObiQuan]

@@KachZzfax

[@SanctusPaulus1962]

​@@KachZz Mentally challenged?

[@crossbearer6453]

Then either you don’t attend Church or have a terrible Pastor. I’ll bet it’s the first reason. Or you do attend Church or did but didn’t listen to the sermons , where the scriptures were literally explained

[@nathanl2966]

@@crossbearer6453 I think the fact that they have to be explained proves his point.

[@darrylferguson3622]

I hate how the slang actually translates pretty well to the actual verses

[@SockieTheSockPuppet]

*_*bangs head repeatedly on wall*_* Also, I feel compelled to say this: "The Lord Yeeteth, and the Lord Yoinketh away."

[@user-ji1hb7wy8d]

I love this

[@gold4963]

Sunday Cool Tees. Nice reference.

[@Arcjaw]

My Presbyterian brain is losing it There's already a "Street Bible" and it is one of the most painful things I have ever read

[@arthures-]

sola scriptura going to be explained as "follow only god's ToS"

[@ChaoticNeutralMatt]

😂

[@bkapps19]

​@@arthures-lmaoooo imagine if instead of the Ten Commandments, God gave Moses the Terms of Service

[@paulandreig.sahagun34]

​@@bkapps19Imagine, someone sent this to Redeemed Zoomer, bruh could get brain rot and quit Minecraft.

[@Ironed-Silver]

I am ashamed of myself for being able to understand this outstanding blasphemy. (－‸ლ) Edit: Since I keep getting people that don't understand sarcasm... I was being sarcastic.

[@calebe4266]

It's not blasphemy, the mesage goes unchanged. Just laugh at it, God also have sense off humor.

[@yeah-rb6kz]

Not blasphemy its literally just worded in gen z language.

[@9and7]

That's not blasphemy. It's just vernacular.

[@samszczepanski2281]

I can only understand it because I know the actual Beatitudes, and I'm Gen Z (I do not understand any of the slang (seriously my mind immediately connects rizz to Rizzo the Rat from the Muppets))

[@Ironed-Silver]

4 out 276 (at time of writing) cannot understand sarcasm. Good to know.

[@Ishaan_A]

Honestly this is the most realistic version of the "Gen Z speech these days" post I have seen. It doesn't use too many weird slangs and stays quite humble in their usage. Either that or I am getting Gen Z slangs more and more every day...

[@WindiChilliwack]

same here, it's a bit jarring for me at first, i kinda preferred the original verbose text, but simplifying things can be a bit problematic at times but i'm getting used to it and it feels kinda weird really lol.

[@GlobalOutcast]

You might be confusing Gen Z slag with Gen A. Im gen z (22) my younger cousin is gen a (14) and I couldn't understand him half the time 🤣

[@VyleX87]

0:29 Asmon with that "sketchy guy who watches from the bushes" grin.

[@nicolaspeigne1429]

I'm not religious, but the message of Jesus is beautiful no matter the language... no matter the language

[@ic.xc.]

W ✝️

[@huniverso]

why people are so obsessed with mixing religion and 'jesus' ? can't they exist separete?

[@nicolaspeigne1429]

@@huniverso i mean the guy said he is the so, of god and spent his whole life preaching about his message, kinda hard to separate him from religion

[@huniverso]

@@nicolaspeigne1429 for me god isn't a religion though

[@nicolaspeigne1429]

@@huniverso but religion is about god

[@thatmeme8648]

Imagine how hard Doomer Bible stories would go if we get this from Gen Z.

[@derpfluidvariant0916]

That's just the book of Job my dude. Maybe Kings too because of the downward cultural spiral. This chapter is actually pretty hopeful all things considered.

[@thatmeme8648]

@@derpfluidvariant0916 I honestly didn't even know that. I'm definitely gonna have to take a look at it now.

[@ramennight]

Check out Ecclesiastes. Its pretty nihilistic about life.

[@WaylonElstad]

​@@derpfluidvariant0916ecclesiastes would like a word.

[@cqllel5186]

Doomer's Book of Revelations

[@AceStrife]

The only reason some of us can understand even half of what's being said is because we're Asmongold viewers. A few years ago this would've been alien speak. To think Gen A will be even worse.

[@profanemagic5671]

I understand it, because I watch soju mald sometimes. He talks like this legitemately.

[@Craftee6]

It's not just asmon, internet is filled with those. You slowly learn, as all gen.z do. They didnt all individually invent those either, they copied it.

[@Warfoki]

Meh, every generation in history complained about the next generation ruining things. We literally have like ancient, Sumerian stone tablets where some old guy wrote down his complaints on how the younger generations are morally rotten, disrespectful and don't know how to address their elders properly, while back in his days, they were taught properly. It's hilarious how some things just don't change.

[@josephbutler4950]

They are gonna speak like cyberpunk style, thats actually kinda cool to think about.

[@derpfluidvariant0916]

@@Craftee6 Just read up on African American English Vernacular and you're set.

[@justsomeguy4422]

that eternal bag line had me dead.

[@Fear_hg]

asmon's editor never fails to fill us with funny edits

[@seppo974]

people never fail to repeat the same comment tens of times on every video

[@syressx9098]

also true@@seppo974

[@jkterjters]

I would unironically read the whole bible if it was written like this.

[@mythmakroxymore1670]

I’m a catholic Gen z by like a year, this is glorious. W’s from the Lord!

[@xxjongjongxx]

Based and rex caeli pilled

[@jackalope_hunter]

My brother in Christ, may you forever walk the path of the eternal W.

[@shino4242]

W's to you as well. May your rizz be ever lasting.

[@Ghoats]

to the skibidi gyatt and the holy sigma, amen🙏

[@aceman67.]

Eternal W shine upon you cuh 🙏🔥

[@Sheriden.]

Ah yes, the sermon on the mount. For anyone who wants to read this passage, it starts in chapter 5 of Matthew.

[@LISA.WANG.]

Tyty

[@SkeletonBill]

I'm not suggesting it would be a worthwhile endeavour to write or read an entire translation of the Bible in zoomerspeak, but it certainly does do a good job at cutting through the flowery language and getting to the heart the message

[@IchbinX]

Like Gen Z language isnt a sea of BS slangs. Its all the same.

[@PorscheRacer14]

It's been translated from Aramaic/Hebrew to Greek to Latin to English (and many other modern languages) already. What's the harm in another translation?

[@EquisBeta]

​@@PorscheRacer14This is not a translation. They've "modernized" it and, in my opinion, it sounds horrendous and a bit disrespectful.

[@austinschwartz7424]

@@EquisBeta There is a difference between "Modernizing" and translating Modernizing is changing the content and the message, and Translating is delivering the same message in a new way that will be understood.

[@EquisBeta]

@@austinschwartz7424 This video does not sound like the person talking is delivering the same message as the original. It sounds vastly different. Granted, as I said, this is only my opinion. It is possible that some still hear the same message.

[@Ifslayanct]

Pope AIs have been dope af.

[@Rubzor1]

top g pope bois

[@spinalcord6308]

“Glory to he who edits, for he hath given us eternal funny.” Book of Asmon-balditicus 420:69

[@ryan8737]

And yet the Sermon on the Mount is still beautiful

[@porgi2436]

Editors coming perfectly with last edit as always. W to editors

[@HeyMyNameIs...]

Finally someone who translated the bible in a language i understand.

[@quickstep2408]

i think whats most infuriating about this is that even though im older i can still understand everything he just said. can you imagine gen z talking like this in the workplace when they’re running the world? 🤦‍♂️

[@Warfoki]

Meh, most of the slang will die out anyway, since as the new generation grows up, they will make their own slang to differentiate themselves. There's nothing new about that, 90's slang and weird speech quirks also went away. No teenager will unironically say stuff like "that's like, totes rad my dude" anymore. Most of the current slang will fell by the wayside in a decade at most. And stuff that's here's to stay... well, that's how languages evolve. What you would consider perfectly appropriate, proper English speech, would have you being looked at funny at best if you went back to the 1910s.

[@PastPositive]

@@Warfoki​​⁠I doubt it for the next 20 years we’ll be using gen Z slang, gen alpha just took gen zs and overuses it so much to where it’s cringe, that’s why the “sticking out my gyat” song came from, it’s making fun of gen alpha.

[@giorgospapoutsakis5271]

You're probably exaggerating this i wouldn't talk like that in public

[@-_deploy_-]

​@@PastPositive Gen Alpha are still little babies chill

[@seaweedbanana4663]

As a christian this is probably the funniest thing Ive watched this week

[@williamgrimm2452]

Using this as a Rosetta Stone to figure out younger peoples lingo

[@ADMusic1999]

I’m gen Z and I have trouble understanding my generation’s slang. New words pop up every day. At this rate, we’re about to make a whole new language in 10 years.

[@Gale_789]

@@ADMusic1999Bet

[@calebcomet1868]

0:43 Yes, that's right.

[@mishtrong]

Old Testament gonna be wild

[@jcha15]

The Sodomites were wildin, and said "send out the homies cuh! We tryn give'em some backshots" 😅

[@-_deploy_-]

​@@jcha15 that's exactly what they said

[@koolunit]

And God was like 'Nah bro! And dropped a flaming L on all of Sodom...fr fr'

[@courtneyharris1006]

And thus eve sold when she bit the apple. We all took an L and got kick outta the skycrib on that day...And thats about time when the homies realized we were all naked...and so we all set out to acquire the first drip🙌

[@ValadrienLeonhart]

😂

[@totallynotasith4501]

See this is actually surprising good and accurate

[@rajann96]

W to the Editor who keeps blessing us with Superior Content.

[@cjoutright9255]

What the Medieval Latin priests heard when people first starting praying in Italian:

[@boomingbob1579]

This could actually help unironically

[@adventofknowledge]

This has a lot of potential actually lmao

[@m.i.g.2023]

Blud just turned Bible into the Broble

[@seiaghen]

i wanted to get up from my comfy spot to write "give the editors a raise" so many times, but this time i really did it, extremely creative

[@Casual.Gamer_0000]

guys, we need to print this bible. i'm currently atheist, but if this gets to the public, i might consider following it :D

[@kazuhirala]

Yo when is Top G entering the server again?

[@MildlyInterested_]

as soon as we remove cameras from existance again

[@TheUltimateRey]

No cap to you, no Redditor nor E-girl knows the hour

[@eomin]

Initially, I thought this must be a joke. Then I started listening and translating this brainrot into intelligible language, and I was almost moved to tears😭

[@snickle1980]

_"And there shall be a great confusion as to where things really are, and nobody will really know where lieth those little things wi - with the sort of raffia work base that has an attachment. At this time, a friend shall lose his friend's hammer and the young shall not know where lieth the things possessed by their fathers that their fathers put there only just the night before, about eight o'clock..."_

[@XarkoCZ]

W to us who never watch Asmon's streams or even his main yt channel. Just the clips.

[@cykalandon8635]

Imagine an actual church like this, kids would be lining up for service

[@KLucero22]

0:44 “Jesus Christ” 🤣

[@EyeboltsBrey]

This is so funny due to the fact that it was properly translated to slang

[@ZrodyApo]

Hundred years from now this will be studied by academics and scholars

[@-_deploy_-]

I don't think we will be here for more than 30 years...

[@kaiderhai86]

"For he will say bet" got me 😅

[@drikkel312]

damn i'd kinda fuck with a gen z audiobook tbh

[@AegisAuras]

We do be canceling hard nowadays. It gets mid sometimes. 😔

[@solomani5959]

Christ is King.

[@unncommonsense]

"My crew is big and it keeps gettin bigga..."

[@FacterinoCommenterino]

Today's Fact: In 1970, a man named Erskine Lawrence Ebbin was killed by a taxi in Bermuda; a year earlier, his brother was also killed by a taxi in Bermuda, while riding the same moped.

[@o0-0o693]

The same passage was in the car for both rides

[@palleppalsson]

I was killed by the same taxi too.

[@good_good_host3991]

Can confirm,I was the taxi

[@BatLB]

Sturdy moped, mine broke when the wind knocked them over while parked.

[@arekusu.]

Cursed moped

[@soulbade-x9709]

I’m Gen Z and I don’t even keep up with the shit my generation comes up with! It’s like I’m learning new slang every time I watch a KZbin video.

[@Paschendale2]

I am 34 and understand like 95% of this. I feel both smart and incredibly dumb at the same time.

[@Ulexcool]

Oh, I know *EXACTLY* how you feel 🤣

[@Hawk-Eye-bs2hr]

I shudder to think of the gen alpha version...

[@webmube]

im so old, I only understood like 50% of it, sad

[@l0kk016]

Lemme guess, mid - late 20's?

[@webmube]

@@l0kk016 30

[@snickle1980]

How old? I understood 90%, but a couple of them stumped me, regardless of the context. No cap! But is it really great to know all this slang at 43? ya know? lol

[@SadBnnuy]

Sadge

[@Chefmaddix]

dog the prayer hand chat comments had me crying

[@AfaqueAhmed_]

My Lord the non believers be trippin'

[@levranz1054]

Somehow, the words sound just as caretaking, and full of love; Despite it has been made to sound funny. I love this

[@Radahntheconqueror]

Jesus ate and left no crumps. Salvation is salvationing fr🙏

[@j.urrutia]

"there it is" dead pan lol

[@jaimerojas6578]

This editor is the one getting Ws nonstop!

[@blu_j_1977]

If the Bible is Star Wars, this video is it’s SpaceBalls

[@aimanmarzuqi4804]

This is absolute gold. Oh god, now I'm trying to imagine if the Quran was read in zoomer language. My local Imam would probably have a stroke😂

[@SanctusPaulus1962]

Yeah, all those verses about killing the infidels and beating women would certainly sound funny in Zoomer-speak

[@aimanmarzuqi4804]

You just can't let Muslims be happy huh. I came here to appreciate this video but apparently you just have a natural revulsion towards Muslims appreciating something.@@SanctusPaulus1962

[@riaanvahora489]

​@@SanctusPaulus1962 , just want to explain, 1.the verse of killing non believers is not for every infidel but the ones who are hostile, it's taken out of context here, just read next verses it also says the the peaceful non Muslims can be your friends and there is other verse which says non Muslims like Christians, jews and others can go to heaven if they are good too. In verse (2:62), About wife beating verse which is (4:34) , the word for beating is darabbah, which has multiple meanings, and can be interpreted according ot reader's mindset or will, the same word has other meaning like seperate or walk away Thus, it depends upon the reader how he interprets the book, open minded one will interpret the verses in a great way, while extremist will in a bad way

[@asd44688]

Lmfao Francis what are you doing here 😭😭😭

[@RitaMcCloud]

Sooo religion isn't exactly the entire problem but what I understood from this is that it's a language barrier. The Bible text spoken and with complete serious sincerity didn't work with me at all. But the same thing said in modern dialect (is that the correct word here) the word of God becomes entirely more revelvent and understandable to kids and if the solution is change the way it's said but the message still is there... the church are really slowly catching up ha.

[@longiusaescius2537]

@RitaMcCloud more slang than dialect because it's less stable

[@strawberriesstar]

"...Jeus Christ-" yes, quite literally my man hahaha

[@spookypilgrim]

This unironically inspired to go to church next week 💀

[@Jpthecool1800]

That’s it, I’m converting

[@Star_Biscuit]

It doesn't matter what language it's in. If 'zoomer' speak is truly that devolved from English, then by God, let's have our Zoomer Bible. Let God's Word be spread in every way, no matter how cringe.

[@regular-user]

He forgot to say "like" in every sentence.

[@yaboiportch]

wtf I love the bible now

[@itstoasty7089]

It’s amazing how potent God’s Word is. I’m shocked how powerful the translation into gen z left an impact as the actual passage without it being modified lol. If you read the passage and meditated on it, you’ll feel a bigger impact

[@peaaanuuutz]

I honestly believe this is how the English language is gonna evolve into in a few hundred years... Looking back, english was weird back then. Imagine what the opinion of the people of medieval England would be if they read English of today. The ones that could read anyways lol

[@longiusaescius2537]

English was pretty stable compared to now

[@lightningjet9444]

I know this joke has already been used, credit to someone called Delcake. “If you donate to God’s twitch channel, it counts as a super prayer”

[@x711gasolinehitsdifferentx]

i think that the gen z bible is extremely disrespectful to god and his word

[@discpiss4432]

Wait til they find out that He can turn water into wine 🔥

[@namelessminionveinreaver3763]

I know it's meant as a joke, but, yeah, sounds great if that's what it takes to get people to read the Bible. There've been so many translations over the centuries to spread the Word to new generations or communities. The verses he's translating I kind of think some of it might be BETTER as a way to look at it than what we were taught. "Store up your riches in Heaven." It wasn't about wealth. It's about doing good for its own sake to make God happy. I'm partial to King James Version personally, but I'm a huge nerd and was born in the 80s.

[@NobbsAndVagene]

Yes, get on your knees and do what you can to please your sky-daddy. Make him happy.

[@lonewolfhero3526]

​@@NobbsAndVagene ok

[@namelessminionveinreaver3763]

@@NobbsAndVagene He loves you too, buddy.

[@longiusaescius2537]

@NobbsAndVagene Danes have any inkling of intelligence challenge

[@artoodiitoo]

"and OP said; let there be W"

[@alsoimpxct]

pure brainrot right here

[@patrickjones2843]

The scariest L will be if you get to the after life and God says I never knew you. No matter how bad you are you can pray to him for help. You dont have to go to church, you dont have to be sinless. You just need a relationship with him. When no one else has your back I hope you remember these words and at least try.

[@ianyoder2537]

I really want to say this is blasphemous, but unfortunately for every one, this is a pretty accurate translation into out wrenched modern language.

[@Black09Wolf]

Jorge Mario making an appearance at the end for the guys.

[@user-un8ei1ko1b]

I don't know what that "W" means, and at this point I'm too afraid to ask. (You can´t even google it...)

[@erebos4203]

w means win

[@magicmilkcartonxd2551]

It means wumbo from sponge bob

[@jaridhope9224]

Games do short form "W" or "L" for a win or loss.

[@snickle1980]

@@jaridhope9224 Kinda crazy when you live long enough to see gaming culture enter the mass consciousness. We Are Legion.

[@WhistlingStickman]

"For the will be CEO's of peace" That got me. lol.

[@LordPebble2309]

Amen.

[@wulfgarpl]

You mean YEP?

[@freespeechisdead7233]

The Bible if it was localized by Crunchyroll:

[@ViralVideos-wp5cz]

W to the editors, tgey really go above and beyond for our entertainment.😢

[@ezdelicades5554]

Im a christian who has read many versions of the bible, particularly in the new testament, I find it interesting as someome who also goes on memes that I find myself hooked on this, I could relate to it more because it creates common interest in relation to the current time period we live in which it creates a simple connection to the reader that makes it simplified for understanding on a degree on how well your knowledge is on the internet slang, I could say it passes as an actual translation of a variant of english edition of the Bible, Im not american so Ive read the bible in a different asian language where words can seem different to the english but recreates the same close idea, This Gen Z bible appears to do the same thing as well, there's even a mixture that existed prior to the Gen Z Bible which is the Taglish version that is introduced in the Philippines which is a mixture of Tagalog and English, its also weird to read because it gives off cool vibes and it was a Pastor who showed that specific translation of the Bible to us in a classroom but it did not fail to give the common idea of what the traditional modern Bible tells you.

[@ladyjane621]

some people call this blasphemy just because its gen z like damn have a humor