MOST ATTRACTIVE Strategy For Dealing With INSECURITIES | Matthew Hussey

[@Azylys-]

I love insecurities. Seing a person grow, heal, expand their wings and shine when they feel secure around you (either friends or partner) is the most beautiful thing to witness !

[@aprilcheung9821]

You love the healing , not the wound. Being with someone with insecurities n seeing how they torture themselves others because of it is painful and they may not be aware of it so healing never occurs.

[@Ilovesushi123456]

What a beautiful statement. I don’t usually expect this level of niceness in KZbin comments. :)

[@tintinpenaredondo6531]

I was insecure as an Anxious Preoccupied attachment... And I am happy I can able to healed and now I felt secure and love myself. More Confident and positive in many aspects.

[@Kris-kq5yi]

This is such a wonderful way to see it.

[@MrSomebodyStrange]

@@aprilcheung9821 Now that's the nice way to put it. There's nothing to love about insecurities, they take a lot of time, effort and energy to overcome, and this energy otherwise would've been put into something more productive without them. And also not everybody overcomes them, only strong willed people with a good insight can do this. And everybody loves strong-willed people with a good insight except for those who are insecure themselves. Basically the OP's statement could be reframed as: "I like watching strong people showing their character."

[@tatyanas9]

"We don't choose our feelings, but we are responsible for what we do with them." - so, so true! This one is definitely what I should work on. Thanks for a great video, Matthew!

[@ChristianaSenibo]

Absolutely

[@TraceeH]

[@elizabethl169]

I'm learning this right now😅

[@chrismarie4681]

This holds true to marriage as well. We as individuals should never stop growing. The moment one partner thinks they themselves have nothing to improve upon then the relationship is doomed. You should want to be a better person for yourself and the other person. Matthew has done an excellent job articulating this, and hopefully will be a wake up call for many.

[@annelinetrollip9087]

When you tell in the beginning of your relatinship about your vulnerability, a lot of the times it is used against you later.....

[@RAE-homely-fairy-of-the-light]

Yeah it sux it's like a double whammy, was already hard opening up, then to get smashed by it later sux. I think it's important to help our partners, that's caring and showing humanity.

[@annebos4634]

That is true, if they are a narc they may even see your vunerability as some sort of invitation or permission to take advantage of you. They'll use it to manipulate you more accurately!

[@MCGreggy28]

I had this happen to me awhile back, and learned to be a lot more guarded until I get to know someone better.

[@francesbass6767]

Facts

[@francesbass6767]

Facts

[@mirandabarbero737]

How come you always post the right video at the right time? I've been struggling with feelings of insecurity in my LDR and wondering to what extent I should work on myself, and to what extent he should try to "make me feel better". Honestly, Matthew, I appreciate your work so much. You always help me bring some perspective into how I feel and help me feel more confident and reassured. Your brother also has super relatable points! Thank you millions to you both x

[@ChristianaSenibo]

Working on your insecurity apart from him will always be a benefit to you. That way you can engage in your relationship /any relationship from a healthy balanced place.

[@gabrielfranklin3880]

true that

[@annajohansson9349]

Wow. Okay. Strike me right in the gut with this one. Dated a guy who “ idealized me “. His words. And then I showed vulnerability and let him in. He used it as license to judge me. I knew at that moment, this is not a partner. It’s such a nuanced topic. Impressed that your work has led you to this depth.

[@Julian.Torres.]

Wow, that line hit me, where he said on constantly bringing up your insecurities damages the relationship as it gets old, and you’re just dumping on your partner and theres no improvement” i need to man up and start working on myself because i feel like im going to ruin my relationship with my girlfriend, i got work to do

[@elizabethl169]

I'm doing this right now. I've become my own worst enemy. I have one more chance to turn things around. When insecurity takes over, it can absolutely annihilate a relationship. If your partner hasn't given you a legitimate reason or reasons to be insecure and it's just you spinning in circles in your head, then you need to accept that you might be in the wrong. Good luck to you!

[@jessianreilly]

I've realised I've been dumping my insecurities and not addressing them. Going over and over the same thing is tiring over time, and if the shoe was on the other foot (metaphorically speaking) I would tire of the same arguments. Thanks Matthew for putting it in such a relatable way, that hopefully I can be a team player

[@elizabethl169]

Exactly 😭me too!

[@andapopescu5857]

Having an anxiously attached partner is hard and it's exactly how you said, how many times do I need to understand, show compassion, forgive and forget, before they decide to work on themselves and the relationship? I am healing my own anxious attachment style, but am now accused of being "detached, avoidant, cold", because I know better than to give in to the old attachment style patterns. It's fecking hard!

[@ChristianaSenibo]

True

[@3rdeyeadventures390]

As another identified Preoccupied Anxious who's been shifting that attachment style to a more Secure attachment I think it swings to the opposite polar expression resembling Avoidant attachment style until it settles in the middle of Secure. I mean that's the End result we are all seeking. In healing & improving ourselves sometimes there can be an "overcorrection" so to speak. Honestly to me, being willing to hear feedback shows it's own security within. Wish you the best in love!

[@kimgordon3695]

Too many times... Not your Partner

[@kimgordon3695]

Easier said than done...

[@tatianaadams144]

I had to work on my own anxious attachment when my ex partner and I had a miscarriage and he wasn’t emotional available because of his avoidant attachment. I had to “understand” his feelings while I was experimenting the lost by myself. I don’t think he knows how I feel even tho I tried to talk.

[@elizabethl169]

Fantastic discussion! Especially the whole "abdicating responsibility" part! Soooo relevant to me right now😅😐 I have a very understanding and extremely patient partner but I'm so insecure at the moment and distrustful as a result and I keep talking in circles. It's to the point that now I have very few chances left. I am unintentionally sabotaging the relationship. I have become the untrustworthy one due to my insecurities. I have to be stronger. You can't half trust somebody so I have to let go and fully trust and be vulnerable.

[@carmenkamberos1156]

“No bird can fly without opening their wings, and no one can love without exposing their heart.” ( Moy)

[@chelseyl880]

I’ve got insecurities 100. I got to figure this shit out. I’m pulling back my energy and focusing on me. I’m trying to work on my self awareness, to break the pattern of insecurity. I’m sick of jealousy. I want none of it. Thank you for your help.

[@waxf4226]

I love everything you said here… i’m doing the same

[@Kat.The.Reaper]

Me too.

[@margaritallove9596]

Chelsey, just KNOW God and KNOW yourself. You have the God-given-power to destroy the spirit of insecurity. Insecurity is a spirit which you can destroy with determination and the Holy Spirit-power. God created you and gave you values. You are as valued as any other person. There is no reason for you to be jealous.

[@paula-elizabeth]

You can naturally get a “Non-Texter” to message you - it’s the way you handle it/ ask. - There are also ways of texting that are highly attractive and will automatically encourage a response. I also think - that one should “Never take advantage” of the Privileges they may have with someone. - It doesn’t show social/emotional awareness and it shows insecurity. 🎯😃🌈🌟

[@lesleyolinger3056]

8

[@donnakelly6860]

Omg on point. But I am past point of no return. Makes being in a relationship a nightmare that isn't emotionally beneficial for one party in the relationship giving them no alternative but to bring up walls, distancing and finally break up.

[@TiffanyNicholeCatley]

It's been so tough to find the most effective ways to be vulnerable as an anxiously attached person who's faced betrayal while my gaurd was completely down. 😑 I definitely end up dumping but I'm proud to say that I am learning and now let situations play out sometimes vs reacting to precieved threat. I want to get better for my sake as well as my partner.

[@gigibtsurvivor3348]

Careful: Some of what one partner brings up as unreasonable may actually be gaslighting. In other words, your suspicion and feeling that something is off is usually spot on.

[@jadegreen1554]

THIS (9:57 onwards) is GOLD. To me this is THE KEY to most fails and missed opportunities - not communicating properly

[@stephaniefaircloth3849]

I wish I knew this along time ago. Totally just lost a good guy due to my insecurities and his lack of communication. I came in hot. And he legit refuses to talk to me now. Sheesh. Thanks for this Matthew!

[@shinedontrun]

It isn’t about perfection, it’s about progress. And it isn’t up to the other person to calm our personal demons. It is our own responsibility to not only grow for the other person, but for ourselves. Wise words as always Mr. Hussey 😊

[@hoseabitrus5232]

I know of a man who could help you restore back your relationship either your ex or soulmate

[@hoseabitrus5232]

He was the one who helped me in restoring back my ex partner three days ago without delay

[@hoseabitrus5232]

Whtsaap him"**

[@hoseabitrus5232]

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[@donnabollinger4680]

Yes, that would be great! Please let us know.

[@lucasgramz1634]

I’m so happy I found this channel, has helped with realizations and has made me think in a way that myself and others never have.

[@hypnohelenchtbolandschoolo4266]

We All have sensitivities. How to build or rebuild safe foundation for EachOther is the dance. Self Love is the Jam. Blessings

[@feliciaezenwegbu3435]

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[@mylittlecornerofdevon]

Very thought provoking content....One of the problems I believe we face in our adult relationships is having to re-wire our brains from one important childhood 'lesson'. For many of us, we learned from our parents and caregivers that when we are 'good' we are better thought of / better loved / more accepted. I believe we take this old childhood narrative into our romantic relationships and subconsciously try to keep pleasing others to achieve love. We all know this doesn't usually work but it takes a lot of hard work to change the childhood narrative and place our own needs and desires ahead of others. Loving your videos. Catherine Duncan

[@ladyk.3630]

Too much vulnerability definitely doesn’t work - I speak from experience. Your “stuff” remains your “stuff” even though I am there to support you. Vulnerability is being willing to show your true feelings or fears or insecurities, but it becomes dangerous when you expect the other person to make you “feel better”. I think every individual should manage their own demons and you should nEver be fOrced to open up about issues if it isn’t hurting the relationship. There is a reason why people should first figure themselves out before they get into a serious relationship otherwise you’ll just end up using your partner as a crutch.

[@_lines_of_joy]

First of all, I think you are so smart and give very well-thought out advises and videos. I've been watching you over the months now. I'm a widow who was cheated on before so my insecurity and jealousies are carrying on to the next relationship. But I'm really trying hard to change. This video is so spot on for me and is 100% applicable to me and my current boyfriend. He's been so understanding, but I'm glad I listened to this, as this has opened my eyes to really striving harder. Your videos are so therapeutic, so insightful. I cannot say enough about how I appreciate your videos. Thank you Matthew! God bless you! Hello from Boston!

[@miketeitsma6734]

Make a green flags video, what to look for, keep up the great work matt enjoying your stuff

[@rocking1313]

Repeating a Vulnerability without making the effort to address it is damaging to any relationship. You don't have a growth mindset. Thanks Matt!

[@RunninChic620]

Matthew, moving too fast is a major tell-tale sign of “love bombing”, which is the first phase a narcissist pulls over his/her prey or shall I say victim. It sucks you in to trap you. I have personally seen this happen in two of my past relationships and they were nightmares.

[@annainglant3831]

Wow. Just got out of 1.5 year relationship. Honestly, it ended because I couldn't stop dumping. Lol. This guy was great- and I pushed him away. I wish this video was made 2 months ago. Thank you for the information, I took notes & hopefully this current single season will bring me a lot of growth.

[@humming_wolf4635]

This topic is so spot on in my current situation. My recent break up was because am becoming toxic to my ex according to him coz when I ask him about those women he followed online he would act defensive about it and tell me that I'm having baseless accusations. Then I tried communicating to him crying to him that my anxiety wakes me up in the middle of the night coz I would get scared that if Im not online he would be entertaining others.I asked him assurance but his way of assuring me is he would just tell me " You just gotta trust me in everything I say" But he fucked up my trust before.He had stained our relationship with all this platonic friendship that he claims but soon as we break up I see him dating those friends I was jealous with.

[@andreamagyar5541]

You are not toxic, he is effing with your mind. What are you still doing there?

[@buckslady]

Hi. This is exact what I was going through half way into the relation because of Covid lockdown. He spent hours and hours on social media chatting to other women. When I confronted him, he said he was not going to date them. It left a cloud over us all the times. I feel so insecure and worthless.

[@stacyq7656]

I’ve always hated the ‘opposites attract’ saying. Yes, opposites can bring balance to each other in some ways. However, it really depends what areas people are opposite in. You can’t have two jealous people. But, like you said, you can’t have one that is super confident and another that is very insecure. Also, when it comes to certain values, it’s good to be on the same page. If people have drastically different views on parenting, finances, health, and religion, it could cause issues.

[@arlenemontaner1146]

Stay bless and safe Matt...the world is loving you and and your every word of advices .with much love😇🙏😘

[@stefimikova8607]

Everything you said… I am this person who is always vulnerable, scared to share but leaving some hints all the time because of lack of confidence. You made me realize what I have to do and how can I help myself and help my relationship just with this video! Thank you so much I am going to be following your videos with bug interest and can’t wait to see more content ❤️

[@siratuzrashaik]

Matthew that was really deep and has impacted me profoundly on my understanding of being vulnerable.

[@marlenecruz4361]

It is CRAAAAAZY!!! I HEAR THIS AND IM LOST FOR WORDS!!! IM HEART BROKEN TO REALIZE HE TURNED INTO THE MAN I RAN FROM .💔💔

[@marlenecruz4361]

He doesn't want to. Even though we both have messed up in 4 yrs of relationships hr holds me to my mistakes. He cheated n I forgave him from the heart. He jealousy and insecurities are driving me insane. I'm really trying to make it work n show him that with God everything is possible. But he don't want to hear me out

[@08tuner]

i believe that if the other person knowns about your weakness then they should be a good teammate to help ease your weakness also. It is good to help each other better understand each other.

[@PoppyCarvelle]

Loved this Matthew the subject is so relevant to me right now. I have just had to walk away from a relationship that became verbally abusive. There was no movement with his insecurities in a positive way only an escalation. He made me responible for his paranoid feelings and insecurities. Ultimately I feel things could have been different if he had been able to communicate with me in a calm manner. But unfortunately anger seemed to always get in the way and I couldn’t deal with that. I had to set my boundary of what I am willing to deal with or not as the case maybe. Regardless of how strong I feel for setting this boundary, I still feel heartbroken and extremely sad for him. But your advice about don’t mourn like he was the one, has really helped. Thank you for all your wisdom Matthew. X

[@stefimikova8607]

In addition to my other comment I forgot to mention that since these words “insecurities” “sabotaging relationship” “vulnerability” are totally describing in the best way my problem - I have never seen video on these topics together before! I am really grateful I watched this video, thank you 🙏🏼

[@LaPinturaBella]

The convo about insecurities being brought up, over and over is really interesting. In the texting throughout the day scenario, I find that kind of behavior to be a form of trying to control your partner. It's a red flag for me. Especially if it's coupled with moving the relationship along very quickly. The key here is the same insecurity bring brought up over and over. It is up to the person with the insecurity to work on overcoming it.

[@monday2756]

Stephen mentioned .. " by the way some people have been burned doing that ( exposing how you feel - being vulnerable ) I've said it before and some shown they really turned off by my insecurity". This is the story of my past relationships.. nothing worked . I gave up on Love . I believed there is love but seems just NOBODY is cut out for me . 👤

[@ieva7513]

This was exactly what I needed to hear . Thank you so much . I’d love to hear more about this topic - about the issues we repeatedly bring on to our partners that I’m reality have no logic sense . Like obsessing over your partner’s past , being jealous etc . Thanks 🙏🏻

[@LunarMarie]

I do feel like being in a relationship with someone you don't have much passion for makes it harder to have the motivation to grow in that relationship. You need to be with someone who also helps you want to grow.

[@lucyobillo35]

I used to be unreasonable like how Matthew describes but it was a reaction to how a particular person made me feel/triggered my jealousies and insecurities

[@pinkconfidantp2me912]

My problem is moving on to fast after a breakup, I know I miss being with someone and I miss being intimate but I'm going to take your advice and be my own person and do my own thing so I can heel properly. 😇God bless you and your videos

[@thebettercouple5572]

Looking forward to this one Matt! I’ve seen too many examples of insecurities KILLING relationships and it doesn’t need too.. This video will be essential in teaching how to deal with all things combined, thanks again for the video!

[@yorti006]

Aww man this was awesome insight. Thank you Matt finally someone acknowledged how to acknowledge a jealous person trying. Cuz its not easy changing your default behaviors

[@angel-mq2mo]

What if part of the whole reason you fell for that person is because they were attentive and communicative during the times when they're away at work; or what if you were initially attracted to that person because they didn't make you feel insecure about their interactions online or in real life with persons of the opposite sex, but now they are. I mean, if the relationship is important to them they will be consistent in their actions! If not, you have to ask yourself, why am I with this person who is now giving me the old "bait and switch!?" In other words, you can't stop doing the things you did to get that person once you already have them. If you do, then you deserve to lose them. And if they stay, they get what they deserve! IMHO😉

[@ChristianaSenibo]

True. You should be valued whether in person or otherwise. Staying only with those who value your worth.

[@Ispyletsseewhoshere]

Exactly ! I’m in the same spot

[@angel-mq2mo]

@@Ispyletsseewhoshere well that's sad. I hope you decide to do what's right for you and don't take no shit from someone who probably doesn't deserve you!☺️😉

[@angel-mq2mo]

@@ChristianaSenibo right!!☺️

[@00calimon]

I have my fair share of innate insecurities but I am convinced that in my last relationship I wound up being too forgiving in order to avoid being obsessive controlling insecure girlfriend. Turns out they were all flags, maybe not red, but at least yellow and orange, that demonstrated his lack of respect for me and my boundaries and lack of honest forthright communication. Seems many people just don't think they need to do "the work" or (preventive) maintenance, and or try continue in a relationship with someone they just aren't motivated to do that kind of work in.

[@Kris-kq5yi]

I’m realizing this too as I’m unpacking my marriage that just ended in therapy. I felt really insecure about how he interacted with other women and it turns out his interactions weren’t always innocent. Sometimes it’s difficult to tell the difference between insecurity and intuition.

[@FirstnameLastname-gm5nl]

Jealosy is a sign of love and honor.

[@whatsapp543]

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[@whatsapp543]

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[@barbaratothd.373]

Thank you Matthew for sharing this amazing video and conversation about vulnerability! Your sentences about openness and boxing touched me deeply.. , it's so true! Fortunately I never felt jealousy but your interpretation on how and why being vulnerable is so beautiful, means a lot to me. In my younger ages I thought showing your vulnerability is equal with weakness. However quite the opposite! Being vulnerable is very powerful, it means self-confidence, openness, self-love, trust... Realizing this some years ago I could come out of a non-progressive, not loving marriage. It was the best decision I could make and I am very happy to choose the growth - self improvement in love and to have tried to experience in next attempts to find a real loving relationship. And I am more confident now that I need the man who is not afraid of showing and communicate his feelings, has high standards of self-awareness, is self-confident and mature enough for believing and creating a fulfilling, progressive relationship. Maybe it takes time to find him, but I have faith that the Universe/destiny will send the best man fir me to my way when we have to meet. Thanks again for sharing this beautiful and emotionally high quality video. 🤗😍

[@elizabethl169]

Being truly vulnerable is extremely powerful. You're absolutely right. It is the opposite of weakness. It takes tremendous strength because it can be terrifying.

[@EmilyGiuffre]

This hit home. The part about your partner making you responsible for their feelings but never validating yours. A real recipe for crazy making that brought me so much hardship with the ex

[@iwuozorwisdom6954]

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[@braddhein6240]

Sober a year n half n relise how insecure i am but I’m working on it n this helped so much ….don’t choose our feeling but it’s how we respond to them that matters I love it

[@guroberger4101]

Engaging in the program makes me realize different sides of myself and hands me a mirror on my own behaviour. It's quite interesting but also dearing. My experience is that to reveil my own emotional weekness is not enough to build a bridge to another person. I have to take responsability for my own actions and learn from my mistakes. Taking actions requiers an understanding on what you fundamentally do wrong. Based on that you can make a new ritual to interprate new behaviours. It sounds easy doesn't it but it can take some time to implement it. It's a lot of work. But hopefully it's true what they say, that realizing what the probleme is is also half way solving it.

[@laramcclure6799]

Maybe an insecurity is repeated because the other person is doing little to nothing to help. If we are a team, then we are both responsible to build trust and help each other heal, not just expect trust and security to already be in the relationship without both people doing whatever they can to protect and take care of each other.

[@aimeechas]

I this EXACT relationship. He always thought I was cheating and I never once did - not even a hint of it. Told him it was HIS issue - it was one of the things that ended us - I warned him it would so many times.

[@lucasrojo986]

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[@melissaperrotta1054]

Yep, same for me. It was my ex husband who couldn’t be trusted in reality, he was just projecting it on me. Almost like, if I’m getting away with it, what is she doing behind my back. He’s now shacked up with my cousin.

[@TraceeH]

I absolutely love listening to your advice I'm addicted ..God bless you both ... Thank you so much!!

[@meaganoreilly1]

I wish I had known this when I was younger. Men would often use "vulnerability" to make me empathize with them to manipulate me into doing what they wanted me to do.

[@Silverwolf-hr6wi]

Needed this eye opener..I am dumping a lot actually and it's not fair.. I am working on things..though it's hard when dealing with a lot and trauma therapy..I am so happy with the man i am with..he is kind, loving, has patience, and i love him so much..I am just scared of losing it..a nd thats my security and abandonment issue..

[@christymckissick9217]

I’d love to discuss friendships and how we can communicate when we feel the relationship is one sided

[@malcolmallison1072]

So true what you say about this topic ( insecurities and relationships), I remember particularly the way you differentiated between sort of unchanging, dumping, vulnerability and the vulnerability state where you try to change and take responsibility

[@Clorophylle]

Amazing breakdown of thoughts and actions. God bless you Matthew

[@alexohalloran5546]

Really interesting to hear things from a guys point of view! We know men and women’s brains / thoughts are wired differently but to hear you talk about how men feel in relationships is actually super helpful! (Not being manly enough etc) More of this please!! It’s really interesting to hear how men feel at different stages of the relationship. I love your videos (particularly with both of you) and find everything really interesting and helpful but I do feel that it’s more targeted at the woman or from the woman’s point of view - which I get as you have mainly women watching but to understand how men think in relationships is really helpful to us. Thank you for everything you do - you’re both awesome xx

[@rainydays-dancing5793]

I can't tell you how grateful I am for this message. It was eye opening and helpful in releasing some things for me

[@user-cya]

I consider this such an important topic. I ended a 5 year relationship for this reasons. For years he would dump his same insecurities about his career, and I’d be there to understand him, encourage him, giving advice, suggestions and support him. But in a time when there were huge cracks in the relationship, I’d just finally take a look at all those patterns and realize he didn’t take constant action to solve those issues, always breaking promises because he was insecure and even staying in places that were detrimental to his mental and physical health. He would make this huge plans for the future, but doing nothing in the present to make that a reality, and I just had to end it and distance for the sake of my mental health. Now I understand if would have required couples counseling to save what we had, but it’s too late. Also funny, he resents me because he feels I was always going to walk away if things got too hard.

[@feliciaezenwegbu3435]

*whatzpp him I was like this be'fore I know who can he:lp you out text him now he can solve your problem:: don't waste your time here......*

[@cristina350]

And he was right.

[@robinsartsandcrafts6500]

I’m still happily in a relationship, and still watching you, because your insights are always fabulous.

[@LouisaWatt]

I’ve dated an irrationally jealous guy who had obsessive compulsive thoughts about me finding someone else or going back to my ex, even though I had no inclination to do so. It got too much when he got jealous about my family and my dog. It was nuts.

[@Draginja1995]

The problems of my last relationship in a nutshell! Thank you!

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[@annasonnenblume]

This hits home hard. I just divorced a very insecure person to whose dumping never finished and never did anything about it. He made me feel responsible for things I never did and I never gave him enough. Funny how I never saw the abuse until now.

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Hi

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[@rebecca5233]

I LOVE THAT... " You can't throw a punch without opening yourself up "ooof.

[@sandrascaparotti7513]

I especially liked the point of improvement in a relationship.

[@womenwhodate7643]

Oh Matthew your videos are always the best ❤️You’re incredibly thoughtful, honest and inspiring. You are one of a kind, wish you all the best!

[@sandragalloway5601]

Great advice... my son and his wife had yhis problem and it judt wore him down to the point of depression. People need to take responsibliity for their problems.

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±2348103378310⏯️⏯️⏯️⏯️ Hello it's works I can't believe am with my love again after so many years of break-up.,.....

[@merlincrystalerm]

You are on a really good point, though I think that there is a prologue to the point you are . I had this experience tonight. There is a guy coming to a bar that I work at, who is there each weekend, severely rude towards to everyone and always negative. Last night I decided to remain on the mute. No silence treatment, but taking out my voice and my thoughts, just being neutral towards to everyone. What become real was that people become more open, they started telling their lives through their hearts.... They opened up. They told me their insecurities. I think most of us are busy being busy building our walls by making noise. And even if we are willing to show our insecurities,do we n't scream out the things that make us uncomfortable with ourselves or in public. There needs to be the (good) void in the "everyday" informational flow, to expose ourselves, as we live in an era of information overload. But as human being is adapting to an environment, we often seem to forget about the quality of information we give out instead of the quantity that we actually do. And this is the noise that keeps the other half opening up to us.

[@joseyjee5753]

Is it ridiculous of me to insist a future partner to watch all these very informative and extremely helpful videos with me ? They've helped me understand myself and others more and I feel these videos could help a relationship grow in a healthy direction.

[@susanavery6733]

I love all your videos thank you for taking the time

[@donnabunch8444]

Matt that was so so so good! I really got what u meant about vulnerable in a relationship but need to watch the video again because I have a retention problem but that was a great video. Thank u so much for sharing and Also Thank U Steve I can't forget U either because with out U I know Matt would not be able to do what he does. Thank U Both for helping us women get a little bit of knowledge on how that thing on a man's shoulder works! Beautifully Misterious.!

[@MagdalenaH]

yes absolutely, it all boils down to managing being less reactive and more responsive.

[@hoseabitrus5232]

I know of a man who could help you restore back your relationship either your ex or soulmate

[@hoseabitrus5232]

He was the one who helped me in restoring back my ex partner three days ago without delay

[@hoseabitrus5232]

Whtsaap him"**

[@mike198383]

This is dead on with what im currently experiencing.

[@nicolef.2172]

But how do I improve my fear of him cheating on me. And yes, it is irrational. I really tried and he is the ideal partner. In all the ways. Made his mistakes, learnt his lessons, told me about it and I, with my trauma, am just irrationally scared and full of fear again and again. Even slipped away from being my true self. And still he is the one pushing me back, being there for me and loving me for who I am. Yes, guess I’m a hard one. A tricky case.

[@VanguardOfLight]

There’s so much good information, thank you for sharing!

[@michakroese6751]

I think you are amazing, you changed my life for the better. Thank you.

[@Chelsea-552]

As a woman who has been with man who is neglegent, afraid of his feelings, and consistently bringing insecurities to the table, it had equaled a lack of a relationship. While I love him, and I have struggled so much because of it, it is absolutely vulnerability and not demand. I have tried to talk about it all, and be open in a loving way. All he has done is refused to be vulnerable. The woman is not the problem. A good woman will always want to be open, willing to talk and find trust, and lift their partner up out of love. Love is genuine. People are not. A good woman will address problems right on, and want to hold your hand through it all. Often times her wings are broken for being vulnerable. If she has any effort for you, she loves you.

[@sunshine030480]

Thank you so much for differentiating between vulnerability and dumping. Very helpful, that's a question I had... love your video :)

[@rosemarylavendar8607]

18:40 I think a man showing vulnerability is actually really attractive--it shows confidence but humility and trust. I think the problem lies within whether that vulnerability will lead into an insecurity that never resolves itself or transfers into the relationship...just a thought

[@kiapierson9902]

This was amazing!!

[@rachaelvaldivieso3434]

loved the example of boxing so much Mathew!!! that was genius!!

[@feliciaezenwegbu3435]

*whatzpp him I was like this be'fore I know who can he:lp you out text him now he can solve your problem:: don't waste your time here......*

[@feliciaezenwegbu3435]

*✝2347034218893⏯⏯⏯??*

[@matthewriegner5180]

We should not hide our insecurities, but like many things if you know it, your are responsible for addressing it. Sometimes a partner can help, but ultimately it is on us to address the things we are not happy with about ourselves. Can not expect someone else to do for you, what you won't do for yourself. Expectations are the death of relationships before they even start, especially these days.

[@walker0972]

Agreed re expectations - however, it's unexpressed expectations that kill relationships. Our partners want to make us happy and they need us to tell them what our expectations are. If they don't try to meet our expectations then we'd need to talk it out

[@matthewriegner5180]

@@walker0972 true

[@ckim5134]

Extremely well video. Matthew the way you go so deeply into a persons feelings and explain it all is extraordinary.

[@fatal1ty531]

Wow it opened my eyes on mistakes I make in my relationship and what to work on. Although I know there is always area for improvement, I honestly believe that Matt's videos made me better and more aware partner

[@michellehastings3203]

If you are honest and ask for what you want and need time and time again, and your partner doesn’t acknowledge or change then…? We won’t always get what what we want and need, but can we at least continue to try and evolve together. I’ve always told men that showing vulnerability shows incredible strength and connection, not emasculating or taking away the hero complex. Being with your partner and “seeing” one another is beautiful, but it should always be a work in progress.

[@nomfundobhengu6829]

I needed to hear this,thank you.

[@nanimal13]

I really need your videos to be available in spanish. I always want to share them with my friends but most dont understand english, it's so frustrating! You give great advice, I really appreciate your work!!!

[@whatsapp543]

*whatzpp him I was like this be'fore I know who can he:lp you out text him now he can solve your problem:: don't waste your time here.....🙏😭💔❤️.*

[@godsplan7726]

Matthew Hussey..you are best in the world..

[@Kristijunes]

This is good. This is really really good and seeing both of you together makes it even better. I'll send a reflex response this week. I promise

[@trippiepot]

Great Video. Great advice. It Helps so much🐣

[@frizerse]

I said all my insecurities to my ex and opened myself like to no one in this world, she wanted to help me and motivated me to heal…later on she used everything against me, even if certain things were done by her passing the limits, never open yourself to anyone it will fuck you up, another thing: all these therapists are keep saying « run away from toxic and bad people… » unfortunately they don’t work where the problem is but actually making it bigger, toxic people become that way due to drama or past shitty experiences, work where the real problem is and fix the toxic ones instead of making even more, i think more people would pay for that…if or how i see it’s their goal, making money from selling the strategy how to maintain your relationship or get the man you want.

[@alisonlejeune614]

Matthew and Stephen still doing my daily weekly habits since my Retreat in September 💕🙏🥰my new relationship is fabulous but I'm suffering from silly irritation jealousy emotions YOU GUYS🙏💜 have as usual helped me to rationalise stop panicking and map a positive constructive way forward Much love Alison Le Jeune ps send love to rest of world Retreat staff 💜💕💜xxx

[@whatsapp543]

*I pray for the universe grant your heart desires l know of a great Dr BABA that can help you manifest your ex back without any delay. He just help me restore my relationship of 14 years back with law of attraction manifestation last week. He also deal on all kinds of spiritual assistance like job promotion, spiritual protection, * don't waste your time here..e.t.c🙏🙏❤️.*

[@whatsapp543]

*✝ 17077502632⏯⏯..💌..*

[@whatsapp543]

*What'sApp Him..💌..*

[@alexaisarose]

I really needed this video, because I do have expressed the same vulnerability twice now, and I am trying to improve it, just not sure how to overcome it, yet.

[@Grace-qb2vb]

this is gold!

[@jacquishi4668]

Quite like the saying of Lily Jones. Definitely, no one wants their children to be treated abusively in emotions or romance. But unfortuanately, people just do it while without this thinking.