If Someone BETRAYED Your Trust, WATCH THIS! | Matthew Hussey

►► Transform Your Confidence With Me Over 30 Days
Claim Your FREE Spot on The Confidence Challenge
→ www.MHChallenge.com
▼
Don’t Miss Out! Subscribe to my KZbin channel now.
I post new love life advice for you every weekend.
▼
When someone’s betrayed or hurt us-especially when we didn’t see it coming-it’s hard to avoid the lack of trust that latches on to us and shadows us into our next relationship.
Is there an antidote to this? Is it possible to regain trust after heartbreak?
In this week’s video, I share 8 rules you’ll want to write on sticky notes and keep handy whenever you need a reminder.
As always, I’d love it if you left me a comment letting me know your favorite rule (and your favorite Jim and Pam moment from The Office . . . I hope you enjoy the example I included this week).
Here for you,
Matthew x
P.S. There’s still time to sign up for my 30-Day Confidence Challenge on July 21. These 30 days of massive momentum will set you up for an amazing end to 2021. It only takes 10 seconds to sign up at mhchallenge.com.
►► FREE download: “9 Texts No Man Can Resist” → www.9texts.com
►► FREE download: “5 Compliments to Get Him Addicted to You” → www.SayThisToHim.com
▼ Get My Latest Dating Tips and Connect With Me… ▼
Blog → www.howtogettheguy.com/blog/
Facebook → / coachmatthewhussey
Instagram → / thematthewhussey
Twitter → / matthewhussey

[@kristymounsey3941]

My ex walked away three weeks before the wedding. Years later I see that this was the luckiest day of my life.

[@amandamiele123]

Love this 💪🏻

[@vj9055]

So proud of you!!!😘😘 My mom had a similar story to yours....her advice to me was; "you can't sacrifice your happiness for a hallmark moment"!! She met and married her now husband 6 months later after that and have been together for almost 40 years and I never heard the word divorce!

[@davidjon426]

Gud for him😆

[@bhmgmusic_nahbi]

kzbin.info/www/bejne/oX61f4psfqZprM0

[@OffWithReligion]

Yeah he clearly didn’t love you and did both of you a favor!

[@stephaniecameron3987]

"The loss will be greater on their side because you walk away with the most loving person that relationship had in it; yourself." 💗 I really needed to hear this. Thank you, Matthew!!

[@summmer77]

@@familyz9349 same here!!!!!

[@deborahmoura7761]

Wow!

[@bhmgmusic_nahbi]

kzbin.info/www/bejne/oX61f4psfqZprM0

[@katee.kinnear2714]

it doesn't actually work this way, sadly. I finally trusted someone and after four years together, he left me for someone younger and married her a few weeks after breaking up with me. they are happy ever after and I'm too humiliated to leave the house

[@jrrichard1977]

Absolutely needed this. I really have to not give all my love away & save some for myself 💖

[@dominalgenesis]

Shits so wild how easily people can lie to you...

[@practicemongolian53]

@@emilyfarris563 .+:1 : (:2:1:3:) :9: 2:1: 3:8:9 :4: whatzpp him I was like this before I know who can help you out text him now he can solve your problem:: don't waste your time here

[@bhmgmusic_nahbi]

kzbin.info/www/bejne/oX61f4psfqZprM0

[@buahburke9912]

Plz stop posting this annoying pic/jingle

[@souparnikap]

1.Give an amount of time and energy you are willing to lose 2. Trust beautifully it's your standard, not because it's comfortable 3. Use trust as a way to make your relationship more beautiful 4. Trust because the alternative is futile 5. Trust because letting go is sexy 6. Don't let your demons define your boundaries 7. Trust not that someone will never hurt you, but that you'll be fine even if they do 8. Love your person so beautifully that if they break your trust,the loss will be greater on their side

[@TheLoudseed]

#4. YES! I always say I don't want to live in a world where I give up believing in goodness in the face of all the tragedy.

[@mercylisa8748]

@@TheLoudseed message he right now on whatap

[@bhmgmusic_nahbi]

kzbin.info/www/bejne/oX61f4psfqZprM0

[@drishtik6355]

Thank you.. ❤

[@Chaz_NFQ]

The first one hit home

[@TanzaniteHayley]

“Letting go is sexy” - only Matthew Hussey can convinced a concept like that and I’m here for that level philosophy 👍🏼

[@jonathanwells1172]

He's really a genius

[@jonathanwells1172]

He's really a genius

[@bhmgmusic_nahbi]

kzbin.info/www/bejne/oX61f4psfqZprM0

[@TheMbeje]

I would say it hardest thing to do more especially if you have an anxious attachment style and you've been hurt before

[@lovinganaspie6493]

lol I don’t know that I agree. I guess I don’t have that same belief in that kind of relationship. I just am not the type of person to go out and leave my man home.

[@GayathriRasingolla]

“Love your person so beautifully that if they break your trust, the loss will be greater on their side, because you walk away with the most loving person that relationship had in it: yourself.” - Matthew Hussey. That is so beautiful and comes from a place of not resentment towards the other person but a place of love for them, love in general and self worth 💕 It resonates. Thank you.

[@fabioladosramos8020]

Love this

[@susannefitzpatrick9955]

….. and lose weight, change your hair and make-up so that when you meet your ex in the street, you look f-ing fabulous!!! It will be like a knife through his (cold) heart, trust me.

[@goldlocky6801]

I've listened to this one sentece over and over again: You don't do it because it is comfortable but you do it because it's who you wanna be. This made me burst into tears, because as one of the worst things I have lost trust into myself. I always had such a good gut feeling but fear is horribly overshadowing it, so that I can barely sens it now and I have muted one of my best guidance in life because of fear and dissapointment into myself. I'm rebuilding slowly and step by step but this sentence made me realise something very important. Trusting myself always was a standart and it should be again. Thank you Matthew!

[@fortheloveofteaching9514]

I also have an issue distinguishing between anxiety and intuition. Anxiety can be so overwhelming that it feels like it hinders intuition. The only thing I know is that intuition is a peaceful calm sense/feeling while anxiety likes to scream loudly.

[@citichic2311]

True sending you love and light ❤️🌞

[@bsem7278]

I was crying really hard last night to the point of feeling suffocating inside. But once I started hearing your voice, somehow I started feeling the strength in me. And, when you said the #8, I realized that it’s so true. I stopped crying completely & went to sleep soundly. I have been every thing you taught, while he didn’t care to do much to prove his words to me. So, I will not lose so much. But I have loved so beautifully, the loss will be greater on his side. Matthew - you have no idea how your great videos saved me times & times again. Thank YOU! Now, I just have to be strong enough to walk away.

[@carmeloelborisway4063]

I pray you find yourself well

[@leahc9695]

Same just happened to me 😢 Xxx

[@sharonm1]

Love this advice. So basically dont over give and hold back a little so you dont fall so far; trust because its the right and noble thing to do; trust because it sets a safe and positive tone in the relationship whereas lack of trust pollutes it; Give your partner room to breathe and let them be free; have faith that you can get through anything and if they leave you will be alright; no-one ever regretted being kind and loving and if your person lets you down you can have a clean conscience that you gave it your all and they lost you and you lost someone who disappointed you

[@rmlopez0880]

Thank you u for this

[@sexymary]

Pin this, please !!!!

[@co_lrs459]

Been experiencing anxiety and depression lately coz of my failed relationship. Im so tired being not chosen. Trust is broken. Now trying to stand again and your videos helps me

[@roman4892]

😓 same.

[@AutoAbsolute]

This was a great help, my wife had a 6 week affair, I saw a text message and she confessed all. I'm trying to be a better man and lover her dearly, but it's hard, so hard right now. Love to all of you facing this horrible betrayal - you're going to be OK ♥️

[@dahliafiend]

My advice is to genuinely question how much you want to expend on someone who has disregarded you once completely now for 6 weeks? Chances are it will happen again, that your love won't be appreciated as strength but as the opposite. This video seemed to be more about not blaming future partners for past betrayals. Having been through betrayal and trying to be a better man and ending up losing years of my life to someone who turned out to be selfish and only pretending to be a kind person I have to say it's more common that if she has before, she will again. Unless there is something I don't know like you cheated on her. She did not sit down and talk about this before the 6 weeks. She admitted to it because she was caught. Were she a sociopath she might try to blame it on you, or a narcissist, thankfully she didn't and just told, as far as you know the truth. Meh. She's chosen to be married. Just being honest after being unfaithful would not be enough for me I would prefer to be alone. I don't know this person's history. It's hard to think of many I'd be willing to let go at this stage, Obviously it's your decision just know that you can do everything right and it can just as likey happen again. Then you will be seeking divorce and be angry at yourself as well.

[@alondraacosta-mora6504]

@@dahliafiend what about this, my boyfriend of 5 years has never cheated on me but he used to watch porn, and he would be staring at other women in front of me, which was so disrespectful and gross. My boyfriend broke my trust by doing this, he lied to me many times about this until one day after questioning him many times he confessed, and and now no matter how much I try to believe in him or how much he tries. It is just broken. I feel guilty for this, because I want to trust him but I can’t. Like there is a part of me who says don’t trust him anymore and the other part that says trust him, he is not a bad guy overall. And I feel horrible by leaving him after he has done his best. Maybe I should break up. He says that it does not matter what he does and tries I will not be able to trust him again, which now I feel like it is true. 😢maybe we should let go. I feel this relationship is full of pain and sadness now. It is horrible. I feel like we just wasting time by this point, the worst thing is he says to me “I should be able to trust him and let go” and now he gets mad when I accuse him of lying again when he says he is not. But he lied to me in the past many times that I don’t know anymore. I mean we just fight about this over and over now. I feel mad at him for breaking something so beautiful, and also I feel he probably feels angry at himself he did that shit and now he is getting mad at me.

[@acslater9118]

Please move on for yourself. That is the highest amount of disrespect, and there is no coming back from it.

[@vihangiiddamalgoda3948]

​@@dahliafiendI 100% agree with this and it is so well written. I've been through this situation, forgave him and tried to give my best for our relationship again but 3 years later he betrayed me again. Trust me it's not worth it. Value yourself more and walk away with love. That's the best thing you can do for yourself because you deserve someone who loves you and would never do anything to hurt you. Trust me she's out there waiting for you. Sending hugs ❤

[@ruchikatikyani897]

I used to see my relationship as perfect. Recently my guy cheated on me. And it's so hard to still trust back with all the insecurities and anxieties. For me it's like a new side of him which I never noticed. It's hard 🥺

[@jward3961]

Sorry you're going through that it sucks. I found out two years ago it had gone on behind my back for years. We're in a better place now but it's not easy. Hopefully you get there someday too if you're going to give it a try.

[@blueocean811]

@@balkh_555leo4 girl leave, i might be a stranger but trust me it will never get repaired. He didn’t think about you when he did it and he will do it again. He had enough time to not do it but he still did it.

[@joannastanden5816]

This is me right now

[@blueocean811]

@@joannastanden5816 i am so sorry to you and the pain is unexplainable bad but NEVER go back to a cheater it will never get fixed trust me never.

[@raquelmariejaruda891]

We were in a ldr relationship. There was an intuition that he was cheating on me when we were apart. We were so happy when we met again. Then, one night, I felt that I needed to check his phone. I never did that before. But something tells me that something was off. Then I found out he cheated on me a few days before we met. It deeply hurt me. I'm in pain, as I just found out a few hours ago. I confronted him and I want to leave him despite he has also gave up a lot for me. I need help to move on. I could never trust him again and love him the same way as before.

[@Ciclopea2]

At this point i just gave up, i don't have it in me to go through that process of trusting someone again, i'm learning to feel at peace with ending up alone because i think nothing will be better than this peace of being on my own, no drama, no games, no lies, no bullshit. I do have a lot of love to give, but i guess i'm learning to be the one to give it to, investing in yourself just feels safer. I liked that example about going to the gym tho, for me i do enjoy working out because of how it makes me feel, and that should be enough.

[@helensanderson7092]

I agree 100% with you. My boyfriend hasn't contacted me in 5 days and I have no idea where he is. So I'm giving up on relationships and starting to give myself love, time and happiness. I have been let down, broken hearted to many times. I'm better of on my own

[@paredescax]

@@helensanderson7092 You are the greatest person you can be with Helen.

[@riasb]

Deadass, I feel you. I’m done 😂 I’m on my own and it will stay that way.

[@bhmgmusic_nahbi]

kzbin.info/www/bejne/oX61f4psfqZprM0

[@Eg-jd9zt]

For me whats helped is that trust is earned. It takes time. There’s no rush to trust someone. Let them prove themselves over time

[@scarletteshane1720]

I really needed this. I was heart broken when my fiance ( now ex) broke up with me after he cheated . It damaged me. Started dating again and turns out to be a toxic or more cheaters . I just closed my heart. Now I meet someone telling me he loves me and that I am the one for him, I get flashes of how my ex fiance said same thing. It really scares me that I don't want to be heart broken again

[@buahburke9912]

IDK about you, but I'm too ill anyway. I don't have the strength for another run in me.

[@nehaimtiyaz6357]

Now I think you're mature enough...let him run after you ..make him your last priority... don't be mean, give it all that has to be given in a relationship...no matter how much you want him, always remember that if he's gone, it's his loss.... people just don't change...a guy will make the same excuse everytime with everyone he leaves...and if he goes and becomes happily married to someone else...what the fuck...let them be fucking happy or sad or whatever...no one and I mean no one gets away by hurting someone...I mean there are some who stay with you and complain about you to someone else...so leave her instead why whine....but one day or the other they will ask you about marriage and ask you to finalize something...and snap...they'll show you their true colours by saying things about you that are true but is this the moment you were waiting for to kill someone...and in anger they marry someone else or their parents choice...oh puhhlease it's all bullshit... mommy's boy didn't ask mommy before making her his gf😁😁😁...

[@rosegeorgina6230]

@@buahburke9912 amen. Not worth it.

[@alondraacosta-mora6504]

Follow your intuition

[@HarmanSingh-ld7yh]

What you say at 9:30, I was so relieved to hear someone articulate my exact thoughts! I was misunderstood to be insecure when my ex flirted with others and I was silenced by saying "You're insecure that I'll leave you".. Its not the leaving I'm worried about, I was confident that my partner will never leave - its the betrayal & disrespect of my bond with my partner. Thank you Matthew for articulating such a simple thing so beautifully :')

[@alexare7948]

Wow that last one was a mic drop moment. So beautiful.

[@braziliandbrazilian7363]

Super hard when u trust them and the time u trusted them they actually were just lying to you and u gave them the benefit of the doubt. When you realize the time and effort u put into trusting that person was actually just a waste of time but I guess that's a risk being in a relationship

[@vgr3263]

#7 Trust not that someone will never hurt you, but that you’ll be fine, even if they do. Thank you, Matthew! I know I will be just fine (I feel that I already am), but it feels reassuring to hear you say it!

[@jackpetersen7545]

VGR,You look beautiful 🌹,Hope you are with a good man!

[@int963]

Dear person, who reads it. Yes, I mean exactly you! Maybe we don't know each other. Still, I want to say, that I believe in you! You will certainly achieve your dreams and your happiness! Just don't give up and be honest with yourself! Now you have at least one person who constantly believes in you, which means you are fated to realize your dreams! No doubts here ^) *Best wishes for you ❤️ from a new KZbinr* ✌️

[@buahburke9912]

Vova, admire your passion. Enjoy life while you have it before you become broken, sick and housebound. I know it could always be worse, & am grateful for a roof over my head and a couple friends. I am exhausted-no syrength for relationship.

[@anyameledamian1874]

Thank you so much, I really needed that

[@sebastianleon5490]

A lot of us come here regularly to find peace and reassurance but also, to work on ourselves. I am proud of you, whoever you are. I respect your efforts to not settle with your current self and to make yourself valuable. I currently deal with a girlfiend who is devoted to me, builds with me and always brings transparency to any discussion or disagreement. I love her for that. She's also prone to get along better with guys because of her type of personality and due to past female friends betraying her. I'm confident of her intentions yet the fact that she allows certain chemistry to flourish with one worker is worrysome and feels disrespectful. I haven't yet figured out if its my demons defining boundaries or that i am not compatible with a personality like that. Still searching for that answer but in the meantime, I will love her beautifully.

[@sofalvarez]

THIS ❤

[@js8536]

I was in an abusive marriage, able to get to a safe house, remain safe and rebuild my life but didn't date for 7 years. I did find a great gentle devoted spouse but still have trust issues with everyone. Your wise advice has alway been helpful. Thank you for your sincerity.

[@claudiaclaudia8599]

Work with a good therapist.

[@bhmgmusic_nahbi]

kzbin.info/www/bejne/oX61f4psfqZprM0

[@buahburke9912]

Why this stupid song over &over?! 😕

[@buahburke9912]

EMDR helps.

[@lon3bon448]

I'm glad you made it out, I'm sure the moments where you trust your current spouse stand out to them and mean a lot to them! I hope your life is full with luck and love in the future

[@elenapopa2254]

Instead of feeling bad by thinking we have been used by giving the best of ourselves better to be proud of beeing capable of love that why we feel bad when actually we think bad.

[@TheLoudseed]

I've struggled with this so much and really hurt and lashed out at someone because of my own neediness last year. That person did not deserve it. I think about what I wrote and I'm ashamed at how mean and cruel I was. I ultimately apologized, but the damage was done. Working on yourself is a day in/day out process. All I can do is ask for forgiveness, and not make the same mistake the next time. Wishing the other person happiness, because at the end of the day, the only person you 'can control' is yourself and how you react to things that happen. #7 is so key. No matter what happens, you will be okay because you decided already you will be fine no matter what. I always get so much from your videos, Matthew, thank you.

[@rorabarnes893]

Absolutely you did the right thing

[@bhmgmusic_nahbi]

kzbin.info/www/bejne/oX61f4psfqZprM0

[@reneesimmons1890]

I have done the same so mad at myself.

[@buahburke9912]

A real guy who can handle life will not let that break him/you.

[@gigibtsurvivor3348]

Protecting the relationship with healthy boundaries is important. Not placing yourself in situations where you are alone with the opposite sex (or someone you are attracted to) is important. The other partner should have the same standard which has been agreed beforehand.

[@keiraadolph442]

Hello fellow KZbinr you can fix your anxiety with the help of Dr James he helped me stop my bad emotions he can help you too...

[@keiraadolph442]

Message him on Whatsapp

[@keiraadolph442]

±2349029353859⏯⏯ WHAT'SAPP HIM??

[@windysmith7367]

I agree but so many claim we are insecure if we try to set these. I think Matt would say we are boxing them in. However, I think if you are both committed to a healthy relationship this should be a boundary. Why would you want to place yourself in a situation like this?

[@jessa9877]

Not really. It takes two to tango and a faithful partner will not cheat no matter what.

[@matthewfarmer1933]

Its hard to love and trust again but theres that special someone out there for all of us somewhere. It's that what I'm holding on to more than anything else despite still being heartbroken after almost 4 months of a relationship ending. Love to everyone out there suffering, we've got this 💙

[@firewalkwithmecooper]

Nah, there isn't someone out there for everyone. Plenty of good people never find the person they're looking for. You could try, try, try and still never succeed. But if you stop trying you *definitely* will not succeed. That's the truth. It's for everyone to decide if that struggle is worth it for them.

[@matthewfarmer1933]

@@firewalkwithmecooper thats a very morbid view to have, people just need to be willing to look long enough and put themselves out there...

[@practicemongolian53]

@@matthewfarmer1933 .+:1 : (:2:1:3:) :9: 2:1: 3:8:9 :4: whatzpp him I was like this before I know who can help you out text him now he can solve your problem:: don't waste your time here

[@NosarNaresar]

I Got completely blindsided. I know i have to heal fully. And start to trust myself first.. my own feelings and my own intuition, because it was destroyed by how she suddenly left. But i want to trust again... in the future ... i want to trust the right person.

[@eeedona.3747]

You have done way more for me than therapy 😭

[@krystiesolfyre5340]

I love the way you describe things so descriptively and clear.

[@MrLordWarren]

Great timing Matthew! Thank you for clarifying this for me, I kinda knew this deep down I guess the difficulty is actually putting what you know into practice, especially when emotion seems to trump reason. I'll keep trying and learning and hopefully I'll be there 100% soon :)

[@n.524]

Tip 8 was really beautiful, never saw it like that thank you Matthew :)

[@eGlamorous1]

Thank you! I loved tip no.7 where you said "trust the tools that you have" that hit me deeply.

[@ehramitschke4888]

What a beautiful video and thoughtful, unique advice. Your videos aren't just helpful with dating, but great for every other aspect of life. Ironically you really helped me with anxiety revolving around a reoccuring disease and dealing with the anxiety around that. Thank you

[@miyanakouyama6457]

You once said to grab a pen and paper to take notes and ever since then I have dedicated an entire journal to taking notes about relationships. Thank you for making the learning process easier ❤️ All of these tips are wonderful . Number 8 really spoke to my heart. Thank you for the amazing content and bringing something worth watching to KZbin . All the best ! 💖

[@intuitiveyogis7163]

I’ve watched this video more than once and learning more each time. Trust has been such an issue for me in relationships. I wanted to say Mathew how incredibly beautiful the perspectives you share are here. They make feel so hopeful about being in a relationships which is so contrary to what I have felt in the past - it leaves such a warm and fuzzy feeling in me knowing that irrespective of whether things work out or not I can walk away with such integrity and self value.Relationships don’t have to mean pain and dysfunction - and I am in control of this.

[@chickendeener]

Matt I watched your videos probably 4 years ago to help overcome my relationships, and here I am again completely unlocking the fact that I would watch these videos to help

[@katjordan]

That last sentence carries so much power! 🔥

[@AugustAdvice]

Please remember that trust is EARNED, its not GIVEN immediately.

[@gabriela.36944]

Great timing for me to hear this, truly needed that. Thank u 💓

[@anjijack5392]

This is probably the best relationship video I've ever seen. Every bullet point was so profound. Definitely keeping this one handy. Thank you!

[@messerjokkel1316]

„But he doesnt jeopardize the beauty thats actually there for a demon that is in his head“ thank you man, needed to hear that.

[@anon_ya]

Matthew, your work is a gift. I have turned to your voice for self compassion and discovery after a string of broken relationships and rejection. I am trying to learn and grow. Thank you for your patience, kindness, and gentleness. You are like the big brother some of us never had.

[@happyngrateful5786]

Incredible. Every word is gold. Thank you so much, Matthew. 🙏🏻

[@bhmgmusic_nahbi]

kzbin.info/www/bejne/oX61f4psfqZprM0

[@naya457]

I’m

[@kriskoman3868]

This is by far the most beautiful video I have seen about dealing with betrayal. I was put through something similar recently and this video has helped me understand and validate all my feelings and actions during such a situation. Thank you so much Matthew Hussey, who have genuinely helped me become a more mature person.

[@cariannkirby]

This has to be one of the most touching, profound and genuine videos I have watched of yours in the last 3years. Amazing. Keep it up. 😊

[@suecole5543]

Wonderful Matthew . totally agree with all you say. When we can walk away knowing we gave our whole heart and we were rejected in the end . it hurts ..yes but we can walk away with our heads held high.

[@reshulyadav5752]

This is pure love. The effort you put here to deal with trust issues. God bless you. ❣️

[@aimo8228]

Thank you so much for this video!!!! I'm going to focus on your tips because I know it is an area of my life that needs work. I feel like I deserve to be happy too and even though I was hurt so badly, I'm starting to try not to give up on the possibility of love and trusting a man again. One of the largest factors for my desire in changing my view of men is because of you and your team (well a few supportive friends have also been supportive). Thank you for all of your help!!! 🧡🧡🧡🧡

[@BevoDaywalk]

I've never felt so understood in my whole life..thank you from the bottom of my heart. This one video has possibly saved my marriage. I almost walked away from the love of my life based on a situation that made me feel uncomfortable and therefore I associated it with completely breaking trust. Keep up the great work, your words are a gift.

[@imstacey666]

Thank you, Matthew for this video! I really needed it right now. A person I loved so dearly, out of nowhere ended the healthiest and most beautiful relationship I ever had:(. It is the worst and the hardest break up I’ve had because of how it so suddenly ended. It broke my trust and hope for feeling secure in a relationship ever again😢

[@tnt01]

therapy helps.

[@christianjohnson4097]

Such a fantastic theme! Love this weeks video 🌹

[@that.simp_2620]

I love this man so much. Wise and helps me heal, always.

[@cleo6482]

I think this is the most precious advice I have ever heard in my life. Thank you Matthew 💕

[@offromance]

Thank you, Matthew. I needed this video.

[@tetehl4731]

Thank you very much Matthew. I am going through this heartbreak that I did not see coming. It numb and hurt me deeply. I let him go in a loving way. Now I am trying to heal..🙏♥️💝

[@yensend]

Thank you, THANK YOU! I needed to be reminded of all of this.... Trusting someone NOT to hurt you is so hard, believing the person you love wouldn't intentionally hurt you, because why would they?

[@davidjay375]

I just want to add, watching this in 2022 after experiencing every single one of these points in some way. The way you broke each section down and explained and touched on each aspect was amazing. Hit every nail on the head, with such simplicity yet with so much detail. You truly have gift of communication. Thanks man

[@mrl4646]

I've had this from a male perspective and it absolutely ruined me for 2 years. She ended things abruptly and started seeing someone else

[@TheMongolianMage]

My ex wasn't going to bother ending our relationship. I had to

[@claudiaclaudia8599]

If you’re an adult you’ve been broken at least once in your lifetime.

[@mrl4646]

@@claudiaclaudia8599 several times but it was a new form of betrayal that I'd never experienced and it messed my head up so much

[@practicemongolian53]

@@TheMongolianMage .+:1 : (:2:1:3:) :9: 2:1: 3:8:9 :4: whatzpp him I was like this before I know who can help you out text him now he can solve your problem:: don't waste your time here

[@butterflygoddess2436]

I love it and this really helped me loosen up… Thank you Matthew, you are God’s gift to us women! 😊

[@Continuesprouting]

Thank you so much! Preach, Preach, Preach 🙏🏽 got ghosted after a year and now I'm stronger on the other side.

[@rachelarnold3848]

Your advice has been exposure therapy for me these past few years and I thank you. You truly are good at what you do. God bless you.

[@jelovibes2039]

Love them beautifully and if they betray you "The loss will be greater on thier side..this words make me help more to get rid my trust issues permanently

[@borislibaque1558]

This is beautiful Mathew. As a guy who who doesn't really know how to deal with a girl's various trust issues, seeing this really helps show me how to be more loving and supportive. As crazy as it is to say out loud, I've lost far more potential girlfriends making breakfast for them in the mornings, giving them massages, or buying birthday presents, than any of the opposite behaviours and it seems to always comes down trust issues. Given these experiences it would be very easy to become jaded, if not for the evidence on your channel that there are actually women somewhere, who put in effort and invest in their relationships and like men who do the same instead of run from them. I'm so tired of having to baby-step things and wish people were just confident enough to want what they want and go for it, and its been a struggle to learn to pull back and be more empathetic. Very grateful for your wisdom and a big fan of your work, its made and continues to make a massive difference in my dating life.

[@corinablank9085]

Thank you 🙏 ive got pretty big trust issues and this video has at the least reassured me that im on the right path to healing! It takes time and patience which is another thing i struggle with but i am getting stronger

[@cutejhilmil]

Dear Matthew! You have rebuild the confidence in me which I was thinking I have lost, thinking I was the one to be blamed. I was going crazy reading articles and watching videos here on YT trying to find out if I was at fault or if I was a fake person or if I was a narcissist ( just imagine the low esteem I have had about my own self). I gave my best to this one person knowing my boundaries and with best intention, but turns out he wanted something else from me and I never realised that and now I am the one who was playing the games and a subject of shame and badmouthing. Well, to him he lost a love interest but to me, he lost a true genuine caring Friend. I know people will talk behind my back based on his side of story but I also know my good deeds will show and people will see the difference.

[@lalaineaquino9174]

I wish I can still be able to find someone who I can trust too. I've got a very traumatic experience. Still hoping and praying to find a partner I can spend my life with. Thanks for this Matt! 😊

[@charlottesmith5760]

Sadly, things happen in relationships resulting in heartbreak. Does it make the person who broke our hearts unworthy of gaining our trust again? People are flawed this is a chance we all take in opening our hearts to love. Thank you, Matthew! 🙏🏾💕

[@stephaniegarnett8995]

I hope you understand the magnitude of how much you truly help people! I needed to hear this! I’m going to watch it as many times as it takes to get it in my brain!!! Thank you! 💕

[@ericaalarcon8537]

Man the beginning of this video completely resonated with me because that's exactly what happened to me.. I got betrayed by the worst way and I never saw it coming nor did I think it would ever happen 9yrs and 3kids down the line.... 😩 it's been so hard to not worry... I'm trying. Thank u for this video! 💯

[@heiressofmusic]

The lad always comes through with the best advice. Thank you, Matthew! Number 7 and 8 really hit me in the heart. Thank you. ❤

[@umarmohammedadamu3715]

I can connect you to someone who help me attract my ex back in two days💕💕💕

[@farewell259]

I keep coming back to this video, and it's always so grounding and reassuring. Thank you, Matthew. This is one of your best videos.

[@MR-fh4pc]

Same Here!

[@Babesinthewood97]

Your advice is unique in the sense that they are always genuinely helpful. No BS.

[@jelenastevanovic5314]

Great video, point 6. " Don't let your demons define your boundaries " gave me a great reassurance for my actions... Trying to speak about specific and rational concerns, and then observing the response your partner is giving - actually describes the relationship you are in... The problem in all of this is that those who are usually hurt are those who are actually doing the inner work and reaching the levels of empathy and compassion to have high levels of understanding and acceptance... but also stretching the boundaries until they finally break, and they again have to heal... I believe people on the other side of these stories rarely, if ever, go through the videos like this... Having healthy boundaries and firm standards from the beginning is the key to sort out all the bullshit someone can give to you.

[@PearlJamAndBiscuits]

My trust issues are so bad I already dont trust people I havent even met yet. Thank you for this video, it's very needed and helpful.

[@kristenfuller9168]

I feel like I have bad trust issues too feels like it's getting worse 😞 my boyfriend betrayed my trust for the second time. He blocked me for no reason all because I didn't respond to his messages and not saying Merry Christmas or Happy New years to him on Facebook. I have been dumped over something small not responding to his messages 💔 now he wants me back in his life he's begging me to trust him he's begging me to forgive him. He keep saying please forgive me I didn't mean to block you I heard that last time. He said that last time to me when he first did it to me. And I can't handle dealing with the same thing over and over again 😑 it's so exhausting stressful. He's not giving me space not letting me heal not letting me have time for myself not respecting my wishes. Haven't even met his parents yet either and he saying I don't care about his parents like what the heck I haven't even met his parents how do I care about someone if I haven't met them .... He's accusing me he's blaming me on everything he's acting like his heart is broken he doesn't care about my heart broken he cares about his heart broken. So tired of him playing the victim. Him playing the victim is not going to make me want to go back with him. I was dumped and blocked on New year's day. I feel like I'm being rushed to trust him again. And he doesn't seem to like that I'm busy with other things in life. I think me being busy is a big problem feel like I had to put my life on hold for him

[@jasleen3665]

Thank you, Matthew! I had these questions and was discussing them with my therapist last week. And you uploaded this. Everything you said makes so much sense. Thank you so much! In case you have happen to read my comment can you please make a video on how to feel secure in a relationship in a world where microcheating seems to be gaining ground?

[@buahburke9912]

Microcheating? You mean PORN???

[@markaspen6711]

Looking back at my recent relationship and how it ended. Each of those points hits home. Thanks man and keep up the great work.

[@shoonyah]

No 5 : The word is self reassured. Loved this talk. ❤️

[@bhavanakambhammettu7873]

Much needed ❤️

[@harshitasharma8740]

Matthew, you have no idea how much I needed to hear this! You're no less than a guardian angel, bless you! ❤️✨

[@clairebear2975]

Thank you SO much. Really helped. Ive gone from feeling of insecurity to strength.

[@gabipretto8068]

Thank you so so much for this video! I am dealing with my boyfriend who has major trust issues from his past relationships. He has a hard time trusting me and he always assumes first that I am not telling the truth, eventhough I am so truthful, loving, loyal to him and always try my best to listen to him. It's utterly exhausting but I'm not giving up! I can see and feel that theres the most wonderful human that i've ever met under this shell of trust issues... and I am not giving up trying to crack it. It's extremely hard sometimes... but right now I just hope that showing him this video will help, even if it's just a tiny bit. Again, thank you so much for bringing everything I want him to do to regain trust to the point!!!!

[@lacey7025]

This has helped a lot, my last relationship was filled with insecurity, manipulation, control and accusations. I have healed from that after 3.5 years, I now need to prepare my mindset for any future relationship and this helped, thanks

[@KendrickJ2]

This helped? The moral of this story was to trust the woman who cheated on her ex, with you.. while she is out drinking and partying it up late at night with other men... lol Reminds me of "The Notebook" (the most-acclaimed love story of a woman who cheats on her fiance with her ex and lives happily ever after... awwwwwwwww. lol) Has this ever actually worked out in Non-Fiction? Not exactly quantum physics that these people are not who you should trust. Films of deceit and betrayal, not love stories.

[@everydaytherapist7315]

I think this was beautifully said. I also believe that it is OK to have binary thinking about some boundaries. It is self-loving to have rules about conduct in relationship without being nuanced. Sometimes it seems judgmental or aggressive to be clear about what behavior we will allow and will not allow, but it can make all the difference in the end. I've seen so many relationships go on endlessly into a downward spiral of abuse for years because of being too nuanced about boundaries. It is best to find a person who actually wants to know your boundaries and respect them. It's even better to find someone who shares your boundaries to begin with.

[@cmrandall9151]

Agreed. Nuanced boundaries can actually be pretty destructive when it comes to the fundamental elements of the relationship. For instance, if there are nuanced boundaries about whether the relationship is monogamous or open-that is a situation that will lead to problems down the road. You guys are either allowed to sleep with other people or you're not. You're allowed to date other people or you're not. I get the central message of this video is don't be too controlling or clingy, but there is a balancing act that needs to happen here

[@godsplan7726]

Matthew Hussey..you are a blessing to the world..

[@sephrah_precious]

Thank you for this video 💝 I’m dedicated more now than ever, to truly heal in this area of my life. I want to operate from a healthy and loving mindset free from past trauma, distrust and pain. I owe it to myself because I truly deserve love x

[@ashackle01]

I was just ghosted about a month ago from some who I was falling in love with. I’m shattered…..I cry every day. I still have the hope that he will come back to me again. And the even more sad part is that I’m not even mad at him, because to me he was so amazing. I feel so pathetic, I can’t possibly see myself with anyone else other than him.

[@umarmohammedadamu3715]

I can connect you to someone who help me attract my ex back in two days💕💕💕💕💕

[@Ciclopea2]

Try to look at it this way, if your narcissist ghosted you so easily he obviously never cared about you, so why should you care about him because of how amazing he appeared to be? it was all an act to put you in this position, it's what they do, don't even wonder why, they're just empty shells disguised as human beings. You are not pathetic, he is, you'll grow stronger from this and that will keep assholes like him away and only attract what you deserve.

[@mirand0la]

It doesn't matter that he was "amazing" . What matters is that he ghosted you. Choose what you focus on in your own narative, it is the only way to stay clear of unnecessary illusions.

[@LonjeMarie7]

Hey beautiful you can get past the hurt and move on. If he was as wonderful and terrific as you idolized him to be he wouldn’t have done that to you. I would NEVER never let him come back because guaranteed he will do that to you again. He actually blessed you by ghosting you ,he created an empty space for that RIGHT man God has for you.

[@elenapopa2254]

Been there, is heartbroken I dont judge u But , if he is coming back to u are u ready for another heartbreak in case he leaves again ? Watch Mathew's video about what u can found amazing in other people The more people u speak to the quicker u recover Time is key as well As Mathew says-if he was willing to risk then prob is not right person for u I know sounds cruel but try to swap , bring him down from pedestal and put yourself in that place 🙏

[@fortheloveofteaching9514]

I love this video! Something I also place trust in is that, no matter what the outcome, the universe is always working in my favor. It has my back in any and every situation for what’s best for me ❤Thank you Mathew! This video helped me to gain new perspective 😊

[@hellosunshine53]

Beautifully said.

[@bloodyheart12691]

After being in an abusive relationship and dating again I've worked really hard to complete the fist 7 in this video. It really helped me recognize my progress but number 8 really hit home with me and will definitely make master the first 7 much easier. Thanks as always Matthew!

[@hootowlme]

This is the first video I’ve seen with genuine sounding and accurate advice.

[@unknownartistOo]

Plus points for The Office reference!

[@jezerdevera2073]

Do you know what exact season and episode is that of The Office?

[@unknownartistOo]

@@jezerdevera2073 Season 5, episode 5, Crime Aid

[@JSolar590]

Isn't the definition of insanity "Doing things over and over and expecting different results"?

[@buahburke9912]

AMEN!!!

[@c.lynnearendtcaleca7775]

this is hands-down the best advice I’ve seen on trust in a relationship. it’s amazing great advice.

[@catherineracicot]

Listening to him feels so therapeutic... so many golden nuggets of wisdom and information. he hits the nail on the head so many times for how I feel and what I experience, and really helps me to see clearly. Listening to him is a game changer, highly recommend!

[@rejnholten]

I so want to take this to heart, and I do really try. But I have deep deep wounds from childhood that makes it really difficult for me to trust guys that I meet. And as an adult the guys that have invited me for dates, I find out have girlfriends, are married, have pregnant fiancees, or dump me after sex... That makes trust difficult to give :/

[@gueswhathappened]

Everyone should watch this every year, I keep forgetting how good those videos are.

[@bellabella327]

You get some of the best advice. I think he really make people think from a different perspective than most channels. Bravo

[@MaryAkaKanyonaticUk]

Your psychic lol

[@michellerains2732]

The Universe's sense if divine timing.

[@creepypisces83]

Needed to hear this today ❤ my partners Bipolar makes this so much harder as I trust him when he is stable. When he is sick he is not himself, he says things he wouldn't say or does things he would never do. Hearing this made me think very hard about this situation and that he has never betrayed me despite being so ill sometimes and he would never knowingly set out to betray our relationship. The Jim and Pam analogy is so fitting as we actually have Keyrings saying "he is my jim" "she is my pam". I will write down these and put them somewhere where I can read them when I feel the deamons nibbling at my brain. Thank you Matthew ❤

[@verticaladventure5762]

Bro... this speaks DIRECTLY to me! I've had instances in the past where, without notice, I was devastated by a partner's decision to move on with someone else or just choose to be friends. This, in turn, has affected my current relationship negatively. But I'm finding strength in healthy self dialog and OPEN discussion with my fiance to work through my demons. I'm so glad I found this video! This is now one of my new tools to handle and heal the wounds I carry! Thank you!!!

[@cherryblossom1405]

This couldn't come at a better time for me. Thank you Matthew!

[@jennadwyer]

Very thought provoking and moving video. Settling in to the fact one can't control the future but control how we feel about it is strengthening. Thank you.