Google Translate RUINS T'was the Night Before Christmas

[@twistedtranslations]

Thank you all for an amazing year of Translator Fails. If you want more frequent content from me it will be coming out weekly on my music channel, MALINDA. Go subscribe here!! kzbin.info

[@ninjaamber]

You're the best, Malinda! You're such a wonderful person and the content you put out on both of your channels is amazing! :D I hope you have a merry holiday and a wonderful 2020! :D

[@WinxAliNelCielo]

Merry Christmas

[@berrthecatlord3614]

Hey translate winnie tha pooh

[@veggieburgerlover130]

Pease just do other book reading with google translate

[@monstar7168]

Merry Christmas!

[@coldwater4391]

“A wine vacume” I swear, Google Translate has an alcohol problem.

[@gausts]

Merry Christmas!

[@MASIIMIDNA]

And that's why it always sex talks too

[@chrrysoda]

@@MASIIMIDNA hahah

[@koolkitty108]

Princess of Twilight what about Satan, though?

[@MASIIMIDNA]

@@koolkitty108 :and that too

[@isaacthered]

So the narrator snuck out of bed for an affair, discovered his girlfriend had amnesia and that Santa was a demon in disguise, causing Santa to frame the narrator for murder and then commit suicide?

[@koolkitty108]

Suddenly, this Christmas story got very dark.

[@minerrale6715]

Sounds legit

[@ttwilight_dragon]

Don't forget China is the origin of anxiety and it's consumers are part of the narrator's group...

[@Sleep_is_for_the_weak]

I ALWAYS KNEW ANXIETY WASN'T AMERICAN.

[@saragirl1465]

@@ttwilight_dragon Well that only makes sense, everyone knows China's evil, just like Satan Santa who enjoys giving out adult toys and cooking his head in the oven

[@grassybirb4152]

"His cheeks are like pens, his nose is a pencil" *Abstract art be like*

[@wolfheart8604]

Pearl

[@jeosz]

I_speak_for _the_birbs, so basically Nick is secretly Pinocchio.

[@thericseascorpion5946]

He is also sexy *Forgive me*

[@retrogue636]

@@wolfheart8604 amethyst

[@rexcake]

@@retrogue636 garnet

[@toribaker8612]

“A tiny animal with eight people!” I just imagined a terrified animal surrounded by eight people T-posing

[@elechronic]

T pose to show your superiority

[@thatmentallyunstablegorl]

OMG i'm dying right now , I'm rolling on the floor hahahajahaajajaj

[@oliverharston815]

This was actually a ancient hunting strategy made by cavemen to catch prey.

[@SorielHDTBers]

WALUIGI?

[@SorielHDTBers]

@@oliverharston815 …

[@actualmemer1934]

“I smiled when I saw her, but she didn’t recognize me.” Every Crush Ever

[@KeinAbendessen]

Me and my best friend go to the same club every time and we know all the people there, but one of them always forgets who I am and comes to us always hug my best friend and gives me the hand and introduce herself. 😂😂 it's a running gag by now but we went there just yesterday and it happend again I've just send it over to her 😂😅

[@wolfheart8604]

@@KeinAbendessen Make a card for her and have a little tally on the side of all the times she's done that.

[@corginzer6139]

Good for you, I *never* had a crush until today

[@psychoseagull3104]

Well what's worse, that or being in the friend zone?

[@shaneaycock9306]

Lonely i'm Mr. Lonely I have nobody to call my own

[@jarynn8156]

So... Santa came bringing sex toys, is actually an animal pulled by 8 people, and kept going till everyone bled to death? Wow. Christmas is rough.

[@beodas5577]

The best comment of the whole video. Thank you for the summerization.

[@wyntertheicewyvern6226]

Don't forget he put his head in the oven.

[@alaylaburkhart5940]

@@wyntertheicewyvern6226 And that's he's now Satan

[@Deathshead1923]

@@alaylaburkhart5940 At least he's chill about it.

[@lea6947]

😂😂😂

[@angsty.axe__906]

“He put his head in the oven....” “NO SANTA NOOOO-!!!”

[@lourdthebluefoxie]

i just commented tat

[@angsty.axe__906]

@@lourdthebluefoxie I commented this two months ago lol

[@lourdthebluefoxie]

@@angsty.axe__906 lmao

[@artisticalex1206]

The best part of this video 😂😂

[@johang727]

6:05

[@SeeManAboutADog]

“Wikiwiki, shave your feet, your leg is fine.” Can someone tell me why this line made me burst out laughing 😂

[@penguin22penguin22]

oof

[@kristinathomas5890]

I don't know but my kids and I just watched Google Translate Sings for like an hour, and THAT is the line we can't stop saying to each other. It's magical. Or if we're going to believe predjudice text, it's medical.

[@golden6209]

I died laughing at that!

[@starkjet2197]

@AC_Gaming915when it said shave your feet i don’t know why but I pictured shaving the bottom of the feet and it made me shiver

[@CreativeGirl247]

"But a miniature sleigh and eight tiny reindeer." "A small animal with eight people!" *Google just did the Uno Reverse Card*

[@davidalicea6705]

I like this I like you just because of how crazy it is like what what does that even mean with 8 people a small animal and a T-bone what does that mean

[@Vhizz125]

[Maniacal laugh]

[@STAY_Sleepy]

Oml true. ALSO EVERY COMMENT HERE IS MAKING ME LAUGH

[@stevedoolan1540]

exactly

[@WarmBreadBearBuddy]

That’s really not funny, My reindeer got ran over by a grandma recently and I’m still really upset about it… :

[@soph8160]

"he put his head in the oven" "He traveled and his team was bleeding" "And they all died when they broke" Well there goes Christmas guys.

[@WildestCarton]

Sophie Dunn we know who is not getting any presents

[@Dynamix6]

Rip good ol' st nick

[@milkshakeheaven2886]

😢 I’m 1 month late

[@KKUNIQUE.]

“But I heard her crying, she was lost”

[@Ash-jw7mn]

Holy shoot

[@rachelnelson9713]

“He got out of bed to get used to the situation” is honestly me every mornings

[@iainronald4217]

Honestly, that's what I do whenever I get up and see Satan standing in my garden perfectly contented.

[@idontneednoname3304]

Same

[@orionskittles]

“He put his head in the oven.” “NO SANTA NO-“

[@maciakontonasakis379]

"The child is a child." "The snow is like snow. " *Hmmmm, yes, the floor here is made out of floor.*

[@NerdyAngel1989]

Are you sure though?

[@leoyori9829]

And the sea is the same as the sea

[@nohintshere]

$20 is $20

[@lizzie4909]

This tea is tea

[@ivie8465]

Virus or virus

[@Diana-gu3oy]

Translate: "As a result you may not realize that anxiety is coming from China" Translate knows

[@LilGamingYes]

Literally the first translated phrase was about the WHO too, kinda spooky.

[@Nefare1781]

LilGamingYes - Woah woah

[@mizusenshisongs]

I just thought that right now

[@ahmadfazlur7000]

Isn't this a little conspiracy...

[@Banshee_Null]

Yo

[@pallasproserpina4118]

“The child is a child” “The snow is like snow” “Dog dog dog dog dog dog dog” Me in English class

[@0.candy.cane.0]

Same here buddy

[@panda_playsyt3403]

Mood 😂

[@dylaneyestone5154]

Sameee

[@vibrantgleam]

IKR But I am good at English BUT THAT'S ME WHEN I RUN OUT OF IDEAS

[@jwsnyderaal]

Feels like what I’m told to write down. Nonesense

[@Tegres1]

"When you encounter an obstacle, you go to Heaven." *Me, every time something new goes wrong*

[@DJTechYT]

"The child is a child" "The snow is like snow" _true, 100% true_

[@AnitaG2003]

_Me trying to convince someone_

[@kelinsonjanuario8615]

TechGeos1019 *MATH IS MATH!*

[@cifge_404]

@@kelinsonjanuario8615 _Oh my hylia you are a legend_

[@JosyDominicanMamiQueenones]

People die when they are killed

[@simplysaturn4820]

TechGeos1019 when I was 1, my mom asked me “what does snow taste like?” My response: “snowmen!!” LOL

[@antoinewilliams4627]

She’s secretly trying not to die inside during this.

[@heatherjohnson6699]

I'm sure she's like that for many if not most of these. Dying of laughter, cringe, and probably embarrassment too😆😆😆

[@CrypticHowl]

@RikkyCZ meaning she's trying not to die laughing :)

[@margheritaparacini7729]

"secretly"?

[@dipperpines5622]

so true

[@cocoolilliabookcat9809]

‘The child was a child.’ ‘The snow was like snow.’ I mean...you’re not wrong.

[@Ellenchattergirl]

WoW

[@ceski3255]

Ah yes, the floor is floor. uwu

[@giabarstudios5733]

Ceski And the ceiling is ceiling owo

[@EcclesiastesLiker-py5ts]

R/technicallythetechnicallythetruth

[@shadeshift1268]

@@sophiamayes4035 AND ME IS ME AND THE MIRROR IS A MIRROR AND PAPER IS PAPER

[@pseudoCyan]

1:53 “World Health Organization” 3:34 “And vaccinate” 5:47 “Anxiety is coming from China” 6:15 “They all died” *GOOGLE TRANSLATE PREDICTED COVID* Edit: realized someone else commented this before i did :

[@unnikrishnan.a5028]

Yeah it did😂. Only if we understood it then😑

[@bc6399]

I did! And I want to borrow the “play well and vaccinate” line and use it for a shirt, or something.

[@netherlandscountryball9052]

@@unnikrishnan.a5028 he did not know anxiety was coming from china

[@xwleine]

Saddd lol

[@netherlandscountryball9052]

@CATch_Me! did i ask

[@Nicro_Allavonis]

Normal: Christmas Google translate: Thor vs. Satan

[@nyxthedragon225]

I would pay to watch that

[@ethnictendo]

Great, now we need a Christmas movie about that. Edit: Make sure we incorporate a suicidal Santa Claus in there somehow.

[@lydiaestrada6703]

*FIGHT FIGHT FIGHT FIGHT*

[@athorashadow]

Don’t forget Nicole

[@mbeakley6409]

Lol yes

[@youtuberfangirlnamededyn6186]

“Dog dog dog dog dog dog dog dog dog dog dog” wise words google translate

[@FulcrumAhsokaTano]

lets say that to my dog called Dog dog dog dog dog dog dog dog dog dog dog and see if he recognises his name (he isn't called that but lets see anyway!)

[@jaylo3435]

The best thing is that I'm visiting my dog today DOGGO!!!!!!!

[@littlefangtarot]

GT had a malfunction LOL

[@HectorH-M]

Google translate needs a pet.

[@theevildrummingsithlord1492]

When my parents ask me what pet I want.

[@theshellacstation78]

"The child is a child" *Every 60 seconds in Africa a minute passes.*

[@fartherlights9594]

The snow... Is like... *snow*

[@chrishagemarcou9174]

Saint Nick. Sleigh of _-sex toys-_

[@iamwatchingyou7688]

The Copper One *Water, snow, ice, lake, ocean, rain.... all are water*

[@ElectroSwingingIt]

Google Translate ain’t wrong there.

[@jboxmm]

iAmWatching You r/woooosh

[@circle3565]

Man, Google Translate Satan seems like such a chill guy. First he takes people out for pasta, then he gives them rides on his tractors, and then he accepts his place as being second to God and now he's just being content in his garden. Quite the character development from "God acted against me!" Now, if only he didn't make the taxis in hell cost $6 per minute...

[@elechronic]

He also let his team die and put his head in the oven

[@lemons1086]

Also if you've seen google translate sings baby it's cold outside hes Linda's wife lol

[@elechronic]

@@lemons1086 No he's Linda's mother's wife

[@lemons1086]

@@elechronic oh lol still

[@ApollosRockstar]

@@lemons1086 and grandpa can’t die

[@Zander1Psy]

My desperate attempt to logically understand Google Translate's version: It's Christmas Eve. Children are children. Their parents are hippies working with China. Satan gets up, assesses the night, and cracks the window with lighting. That summons Thor's locusts and they do battle. But the parents, holy to St. Nicholas, pray to him. So tiny animal St. Nick (with a pen and pencil face) rides in with his sleigh pulled by eight people to kill Satan. He yells random advice and carries a sack of sex toys. St. Nick breaks the roof as some guy named Paul goes up the fireplace. One of them is rubbing feathers on himself. Meanwhile, Nicole is in the kitchen hatching some eggs and getting drunk. Flutes ooze from the trees. Suddenly, St. Nick's face explodes. The narrator runs for Nicole, but she doesn't recognize them. Meanwhile, St. Nick starts acting - he fills the stockings over the oven, curses his finger (maybe he burnt it?), then sticks his head in the oven. He leaves with his bleeding team, but they all break and die. So Nicole, lost, cries at St. Nick as he falls from the sky: "Happy Birthday to everyone and good luck." P.S. Dog.

[@mischamccarthy5887]

Thank you for making my day!!!😀😀

[@icantthinkofaname7293]

This looks like one of those scripts written by a bot.

[@koolkitty108]

Can this be a new Christmas movie? Please.

[@Sam-lb8xs]

That makes perfect sense! So that's what Clement Moore was trying to say! I haven't laughed so hard in a while...!

[@patrickmccurry1563]

This makes more sense than quite a few of the Adult Swim cartoons.

[@mandymaclean1055]

It's like the original is read through the eyes of an innocent child, and the translation is the mother who watched on in horror, and feels the need to tell the neighbours what actually happened.

[@erica4030]

Even with Santa and his sleigh full of s*x toys

[@lorken22]

And "dog dog dog dog dog dog dog dog dog" is when she just broke 😂

[@wolfheart8604]

Amelia Dogwood Your username is convenient

[@gloriaguo229]

“Shave your feet! Your leg is fine!” Google translate, FYI, my foot is not more hairy than my leg

[@amykeith9426]

Peony the Pinecone “Now dash away! Dash away! Dash away all!” = Wikiwiki! Shave your feet! Your leg is fine! “The prancing and pawing of each little hoof” =Small foot and stress. Is the real message here about Santa expressing that he needs to see a podiatrist?

[@GlacialSkyfarer]

W i k i w i k i

[@mmstv3604]

If your a pine cone you don’t even have legs or feet

[@gloriaguo229]

M&M's TV good point

[@mejanordberg4475]

“World health organization” “Anxiety is coming from China” “Stay well and vaccinate” How did you know!?

[@cpt_nordbart]

Happy birthday to everyone and good luck!

[@bishietuikku3588]

Yeah I just realized myself google translate predicted COVID !!

[@isaacbaxter253]

Google translate is a fortune teller

[@charcharslide239]

google translate is omni-present

[@luviee4554]

Underrated 1

[@DrPappy-un3op]

Google translate saw the future “On the night before Christmas and all World Health Organization.” “As a result you may not realize that anxiety is coming from China.” “Duchess now! Well, dance! Play well and vaccinate!” Edit: just realized someone else already pointed this out ._.;

[@ethan8106]

Lol

[@paintingroxy1668]

................ Me:why do i hear corona so-

[@sizlax]

Yea.. These lyrics were pretty uncanny...

[@diglettblue]

Ummm she predicted the future

[@redpalkia0682]

@@diglettblue Dance, play well and vaccinate... maybe the vaccine will come out on mardi gras?

[@phoebe1018]

English: And the smoke, it encircled his head like a wreath Google translate: DOG DOG DOG DOG DOG DOG DOG DIG

[@quackcreations1546]

Phoebe 101 that one single typo on your comment “DIG”.

[@alorikitsune6394]

Google Translate: DOG DOG DOG DOG DOG DOG DOG DOG Phoebe 101: DOG DOG DOG DOG DOG DOG DOG DIG

[@gaminggamerguy9107]

“Santa’s sleigh of sex toys” Hum Idk who is to blame the kids who asked for them or Santa

[@hunrgyok4229]

If there are teens then The children but if teens dont belive.. santa doing dirty

[@Ellenchattergirl]

I'm gonna pull the Mrs Claus card

[@sinteleon]

Well, someone has certainly been naughty..

[@wonderrxo2904]

*”no, No, NOOOOo”* -Malinda

[@Ellenchattergirl]

You've been a naughty girl, come and sit on my lap

[@ShaunM926]

"When Satan was in the garden, he was content" I died

[@rosiered6712]

Paradise lost

[@kberhvoierjgn]

“This is a collaborative with other Chinese consumers.” “Anxiety is coming from China.” CORONA VIRIUS!

[@LilGamingYes]

Literally the first translated phrase was about the WHO too, kinda spooky.

[@userx-inactive8]

Wonder if the translator was trying to send a message

[@kavanamarasinghe]

Oh my god that’s what I thought

[@Anacone]

I had to check when this video was released.

[@jtom2958]

It mentioned the WHO, vaccines, China causing anxiety, and the Chinese collaborative..... :o

[@Emily-cy6ej]

"Dog dog dog dog dog dog dog dog dog." Jeez, that's one person's Christmas list right there.

[@DeZeCrATioN]

It's my christmas list :D

[@Emily-cy6ej]

@@DeZeCrATioN Same!!

[@Retrenorium]

@@Emily-cy6ej same except with 233 million dogs

[@davincent98]

Kind of like Lisa Simpson's list: A pony A pony A pony A pony A pony A pony A pony A pony A pony

[@zionnemakoma1398]

Only person I can think of who would get that already has like 15.

[@SpectralMagnolia]

"When Satan was in the garden, he was content" So *that's* Malinda's unknown friend from Love Letter!

[@NerdyAngel1989]

Personally I think Satan’s PR team need to hear about this get some rebranding going on, maybe a KZbin channel going. Satan’s Monday Gardening Tips for the Demon on the Go.

[@aliya_7]

Malinda: And the smoke, it encircled his head like a wreath. Google Translate: Dog Dog Dog Dog Dog Dog Dog Dog Dog Dog Dog. Me: * accidently chokes on my popcorn and laughs it out*

[@gregoryhilton8059]

I totally agree with you!!!

[@nightwing-scp4268]

I was reading this and eating egg rolls at the same time and I just got to that part and I did the same xd

[@RobbyMounce]

Do you remember ever watching her video on how to enjoy Google Translate RESPONSIBLY? lol! I think it’s actually called “An Issue I Need To Address”………..? Maybe?! Idk? 🤷‍♂️ lol! I have suffered a TBI………….lol! ❤

[@samanthavictoria3308]

Why is no one talking about Santa’s suicide attempt😂

[@Sam-lb8xs]

Samantha Victoria even St Nicholas has his moments. As somebody who endures depression and anxiety, I can definitely relate to his moment of despondency.

[@samanthavictoria3308]

Samuel Ford I’m screaming😂

[@edwarddelacruz3923]

Calm down everyone! He was just checking if you left extra cookies.

[@WatermelonLord_]

I did

[@WatermelonLord_]

@@edwarddelacruz3923 i didnt think of it like that... welp i have a dark mind.

[@CocoTheMii]

“The child is a child.” “The snow is like snow.” The first rule of tautology club is the first rule of tautology club.

[@timelordsrapbattles8498]

Hm yes the floor here is made out of floor

[@sanegamerlady5947]

Malinda is called Malinda

[@singingcalmercreepypasta6325]

Ah yes , the creepypasta here is made of creepypasta . OR SPAGHETTI Edit : If you don't know what creepypasta is , then here #CreepypastathemoveDuskandDawn

[@ColorOfIZONE]

“I feel like the possibility of all those possibilities being possible is just another possibility that could possibly happen.” - Mark Lee, 2019

[@magogosora]

“This is a collaboration with other Chinese consumers.” “As a result, you may not realize that anxiety is coming from China.” I somehow expected this and yet didn’t expect this at the same time…

[@puredemon5926]

Expect the unexpected with Google Translate. :D

[@wolfheart8604]

Oh no XD

[@ryansenft3315]

I would think it's coming from North Korea but still works.

[@itsreeah2663]

“Play well and vaccinate!" "His face was full of explosions!" I think Google translate is obsessed with science

[@shittyliving]

and obssessed with 2020/21

[@driesbaelen2221]

"And they all died when they broke" "She was lost" "He put his head in the oven" In remembrance of everyone who... "HaPpY bIrThDaY tO eVeRyOnE"

[@Ellenchattergirl]

-HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YA!

[@AnEffingPinkCatThatBreathes]

And gooood luck! *Saint Nicholas Sleigh of **-sex toys-*

[@janawinch4266]

“I smiled when i saw her, but she didn’t recognize me” Me when I mistake someone for my friend.

[@omni-galachu9684]

*Pain*

[@missyaniabdullah]

Omg samee

[@Catasros]

"When you encounter an obstacle, you go to heaven." BOY that escalated quickly.

[@AlqhemyA]

“thor winks and unlocks the locusts” so now we know who to blame for the locusts.

[@rubyrangitsch5248]

Are we sure it wasn't Loki in disguise?

[@safyre23]

69 years ago, you got me

[@yourdadssecretlover]

When I read your name I thought it said that the comment was posted 69 years ago-

[@frostyvoid827]

*THERE WILL BE A SPOON SHORTAGE*

[@alexf9480]

"The child is a child." Ah yes, the floor is made out of floor.

[@un-human418]

And ded peeg is made of ded peeg

[@treefrogg]

ah yes, the snow here is made out of snow

[@lydiasoares88]

Ah yes, The sand is made out of sand.

[@CapybaraFilms0107]

And the window is......a window?

[@animegirl8033]

@@shermendlakk We can make a stop to that. Save Africa today

[@VeraEdelman]

"On the night before Christmas and all World Health Organization." "This is a collaboration with other Chinese consumers." "He got up out of bed to get used to the situation." "I feel like I'm starving!" "Duchess now! Well, dance! Play well and vaccinate!" "After the stupidity." "As a result you may not realize that anxiety is coming from China." "And they all died when they broke." "Happy Birthday to everyone and good luck!" ....was this a warning??? 😂😂

[@OhsweetOhno]

@Vera theBanana yep. Google tried to warn us but we didn’t listen

[@Everettalla]

Yo anyone watching on 2019? :D haha, I’m so excited for March. I’m going on a huge family trip, we’re going to every country!!

[@eebertdeebert]

@@Everettalla Yeah, about that...

[@IceePhoenix]

I think XD

[@IceePhoenix]

@@Everettalla .... 2019? Your comment says 3 days ago and it's not edited. It's 2020

[@gillbates4213]

"this is a collaboration with other Chinese consumers" "anxiety is coming from China" Top ten saddest anime betrayals of all time

[@psychoseagull3104]

Anime is Japanese though...

[@electracatforever3356]

r/wooosh

[@simplysaturn4820]

Matthew Moules yes

[@k3njii917]

Alec Gerhardt Joke child

[@mochibabe8622]

Anime is Japanese geez

[@turtl3912]

Nobody talking about “St Nicholas Sleigh of Sex Toys?”

[@doloresgronenberg5882]

I was looking for comments of that!! And that's disturbing and creepy, and he's a saint too and knowing what Christmas means... yeah...

[@stepheneguevara1165]

@@doloresgronenberg5882 yeah me to

[@TheNumbersGuy-bm6bt]

No No No No

[@marcofrancke]

Malinda agter saying it: no no nonono why did I say that ima die now

[@AlexGW]

This sounds like someones acid trip at Christmas Black and White: telling the story of the night Colour: What you actually said.

[@flamingexhaust5725]

"... that anxiety is coming from China." Google translate has been trying to warn us this entire time...

[@xwtek3505]

An idea: use google translate for fortunetelling

[@latifaalneyadi7181]

“The child is a child” “The snow is like snow” Wow so deep

[@callarkisonsyouthspawn3786]

The more you know

[@Marrshmo]

yes.

[@DaTDMasters]

*MOOD*

[@vipro1090]

This is a sneak peak at Billie eilish's new song

[@H0IidayGirl1225]

Jeb: The snow is snowier

[@fusion7246]

"Wine vacuum" "After the stupidity, throw it back" Just a typical christmas day

[@Strawberry-sm2em]

yup

[@nhipham6723]

"As a result,you may not realize that anxiety is coming from China" Google translate predict the future (☉｡☉)!

[@LilGamingYes]

Literally the first translated phrase was about the WHO too, kinda spooky.

[@suzichee6193]

Nice mitsuba pfp

[@911couple5]

Toriki Norikarin ya no kidding lol

[@BURRLT01]

CORONAVIRUS

[@aquaticangel3380]

*And good luck.*

[@RyanSandberg]

Nobody: Nobody at all: Google Translate: Wikiwiki! Shave your feet!

[@jonathancripe5776]

I can not at all even remotely understand this constantly reposted template of a comment. What in the world does the phrase "nobody" and "nobody at all" followed by a colon then blank space make any sense?

[@samanthavictoria3308]

Ryan Sandberg YOUR LEG IS FINE

[@pennyfriesen9314]

@@jonathancripe5776 Ok boomer

[@gachaemily9252]

@@jonathancripe5776 omg follow the memes will you it means no one but this random message example No one: No one AT ALL: Jonathan Cripe:WhaT DoEs ThAT mEaN?

[@thecrepeofdeath]

@@jonathancripe5776 it's just a meme, you can look it up on knowyourmeme if you don't get it

[@t.s.teller8530]

"All the World health organization." "You may not realise anxiety is coming from China." Translate knew, she was trying to warn us!

[@MrMatthias]

The prophecy...!

[@lizalexander1164]

Something about vaccines too I think. So weird

[@freshfighter9]

Plays well, and vaccinate

[@BeanKally]

“When satan was in the garden, he was content.” “He got out of bed to get used to the situation.” “The window cracked like an electrician.” “Thor winks and unlocks the locusts.”

[@etaohouse6765]

T’was the night before Christmas, covered, by google translate: On the night before Christmas, and all world Health Organization Lice, mice, ETC.Socks attached to the oven carefully I consider my self holy to st Nicolas The child is a child When a sesame seed sits in my head This is a collaboration with other Chinese consumers Just concentrate on your cool mindd~ When Santana was in the garden he was content He got out of the bed to get used to the situation The window cracked like a electrician Thor winks and unlocks the locust At night it looks like a ice cub A wine vacuum Ask me what I think A small animal with at tiny people I feel like I’m starving I soon learned he was killed by st nick When he finished his book Telephone communication, and communication “Duchess now! well, dance! play well, and vaccinate!” Join the blur, no thank you! Lights and onions! Above the pillar till the bar Wiki wiki! Shave your feet! Your leg is fine! And the baby can fly faster than the storm When you meat a obstacle, you go to heaven So fly St Nicolas sleigh full of sex toys Then I heard a crack in the roof Small foot, and stress My head is painted on a poster Paul fire place, going up. Nicole was in the kitchen And he rubbed the feathers from head to foot All her eggs were hatched After the stupidity Throw it back Nice work, the card looks great! His eyes like a pen his nose is like a pencil Her funny seed grows like a suitcase The snow is like snow The tree oozes fluids Dog, dog, dog, dog, dog, dog, dog, dog, dog His face was full of explosions It looks like a cub full of concrete The fat and cream are old and dwarf I smiled when I saw her, but she didn’t saw her, but she didn’t recognized me…He just rolled his eyes and patted his head As a result you may not notice anxiety is coming from China He said nothing and immediately began acting All the vegetables were grown, it sounded like a surprise He cursed his finger He put his head inside the oven He traveled and his team was bleeding And they died when they broke But I heard her cry, she was lost Happy birthday to all and good luck! Judges: ❌❌❌

[@izukutodoroki9573]

Dude, you need more likes!

[@shadowisinsane845]

*clap clap clap*

[@ch1ch1_34]

*Awkward silence* *Slow clapping starts* 👏👏

[@itzchin]

Woah. U have time 😂

[@fruityfruity6178]

Itz Chin! That’s called quarantine :(

[@detectivestudios7699]

Can we get socks saying: "Wikiwiki! Shave your feet! Your leg is fine!"?

[@elizabethjohnson4034]

I'd buy them

[@prastarkeepers]

“When Satan was in the garden, he was content” So you’re telling me that whole chapter of Genesis was just all about a snek trying to get rid of the two naked people who had decided to move into his happy place?

[@kindakyana2372]

I guess so...hmm

[@WhatRemainsofNovaJames]

Yup

[@TheSpectator7]

Anything is an alternative happy place compared to Hell.

[@psychoseagull3104]

Yup.

[@AlqhemyA]

How did “Tore open the shutters and threw up the sash” Become “Thor winks and unlocks the locusts” Wait...

[@vezniljack3658]

"On the night before Christmas and all World Health Organization" "This is a collaboration with other Chinese consumers" "As a result, you may not realize that anxiety is coming from China" HOW COULD WE HAVE BEEN SO BLIND, THIS VIDEO WAS A PROPHECY

[@shadowisinsane845]

OH MY GOD-

[@matthewmitchell3457]

Also, at the beginning, she offered a deal on audible and emphasized the part about news updates for the coming year. I almost expected her to wink when she said that. Also that bit about telephone communication and communication... Also, it encouraged us to vaccinate at 3:34, though I'm not sure how that would help... we don't have COVID19 vaccine yet. At any rate, you're right. Malinda is a prophet.

[@julieta6171]

OH S**T

[@adamgriffith9114]

Mind reader

[@hexvitaminddeficiency9690]

VezNilJack wait, Corona virus was anxiety. Bruhhhhhh.

[@poyobox8301]

"The child is a child" My parents discussing me.

[@toast6349]

someone: MY LEG IS BROKEN HELP-- Google Translate: YOUR LEG IS *FINE*

[@driesbaelen2221]

Shave your feet!

[@Blue_phoenixLover]

@@A0001_ wiki shave your feet!

[@memester2909]

"Satan was in the garden" This is what I said in my head: "Hey mom can you get the holy water? Satan's in the garden again!"

[@Peace_and_Flowers]

Oh no not again!

[@GasparzinOfTheCoffee]

But he's content :)

[@pongo7931]

I think that google translate will just make it better.

[@soniaweider4348]

Me too.

[@jordancooper2038]

ß

[@leoyori9829]

“As a result you may not realize that anxiety is coming from China” Well at least google translate understands the anxiety of the corona virus

[@LilGamingYes]

Literally the first translated phrase was about the WHO too, kinda spooky.

[@PeachLemonade_]

LilGamingYes did u literally copy and paste that everywhere 🤦🏻‍♀️

[@fatmaalsheibani5586]

Lol omg

[@leoyori9829]

cookiiz Exactly my point

[@michi-tankenka8116]

@@LilGamingYes stop spamming

[@FyberOptiX_]

"His cheeks are like pens, his nose is a pencil." Sounds like Pinocchio.

[@ceski3255]

Is this a BFB ship???? o.O

[@gregoryj1477]

“You may not know that China brings anxiety” -Google Translate “Wait, why do I have anxiety? I have never been to China.” -Me

[@elechronic]

I can relate

[@starlegends3092]

Mayby they shipped it over to Amarica with all the stuff we by from China

[@Lucario0007]

@@elechronic but covid

[@elechronic]

@@Lucario0007 Surprisingly, covid never gave me anxiety

[@bubtheesseffex6015]

“The child is a child” “The snow is like snow” “Dog dog dog dog dog dog dog” Me in a nutshell

[@WoodlouseFairy]

Hed hed hed hed hed hed hed hed hed hed hed hed hed hed hed hed hed hed hed hed hed hed hed hed hed hed hed hed hed hed hed hed hed hed hed hed hed hed hed hed Snisco 3900 Bed is bad Me in a nutshell

[@ilikecorn6943]

ah yes, the child is a child.

[@Darthmaster52]

him yes the floor is made out of floor

[@christinauwu436]

After the stupidity

[@TsuyuAsui-m2m]

"He put his head in the oven"..............THAT MADE ME LAUGH SO HARD.

[@elechronic]

Rip Santa 99999999999-2020

[@hex28]

Ikr I laughed so hard I scared my dog, also the way she said no Santa nooooo. Got me

[@davendavid]

Same .-.

[@sodium223]

Hands down the best line google translate has ever made

[@lourdthebluefoxie]

me too

[@blake_cosplays]

"Saint Nicholas Sleigh of Sex toys" "No no no no" Me: NOPE NOPE NOPE

[@bramblestar334]

OH GOD NO

[@castielangelwing7448]

Oh yes,oh yes,oh yes!

[@Mothicide]

Oh NOOOOOOOO

[@charlesandshimmerposey2725]

yes yes yes

[@urarakaochaco790]

Nooooo

[@SIiceOfCake]

“ satan was in the garden, he was content.” Me: well that’s surprising :P

[@lemurlover7975]

When Jesus was in the garden He was crying so it makes sense that Satan was content with Him at that time. But Jesus still died and rose after 3 days and so Satan ended up losing in the end ... which overcame any small comfort Satan might have had seeing Jesus in distress in the garden of Gethsemane.

[@rosiered6712]

Paradise lost

[@fishnewt1331]

Google Translate: “And the baby can fly faster than the storm.” Ah yes. Everyone knows the story of Superman.

[@jareththegoblinking3191]

Are sure that isn’t baby Jesus?

[@davincent98]

@@jareththegoblinking3191 they are the House of El

[@marvindujardin463]

Superbaby of the Incredibles?

[@tardueful]

@@marvindujardin463 Yesssss

[@taehyvnqii]

*_“when satan was in the garden, he was content”_* oh dear-

[@Damien-oi4vv]

• lemøn • oh deer

[@celia1818]

oh my i see-

[@henrywong2224]

• lemøn • u flamingo fan?

[@henrywong2224]

Nvm the google translate is a flamingo fan

[@taehyvnqii]

Henry Wong ya I watch flamingo

[@L0onyMo0ny]

“The child is a child” Ah yes, this child is made of child

[@monad_tcp]

this is Terrifying

[@L0onyMo0ny]

Luiz Felipe good.

[@theoumber6604]

My child is made of adult

[@monad_tcp]

@@theoumber6604 Can you imagine a child made out of human meat? that would be nasty

[@jackh.3052]

@@monad_tcp no it is good actually

[@atoaster1209]

4:52 Can we appreciate Malinda containing her laughter after "his nose is like a pencil"?

[@Vassi_Drakonov]

"Saint Nicholas Sleigh of sex toys." Santa is forever ruined for me......

[@RamblingGremlin2]

It took me forever to find this comment!

[@amyjones7023]

No no on on

[@LunaandEve]

Yep.. me too... I am forever scarred for life.. 😂

[@capn7298]

Santa can't wait to visit the children

[@mangotango2798]

Underrated. I spit my milk all over my iPad, which is why I’m typing this on my laptop

[@v1de0gamr23]

"As a result, you may not realize that anxiety is coming from China." That line aged well.

[@IceFox606]

P A I N

[@errietaanderson4670]

I K R

[@kioku119]

They also mentioned "all world health organizations" and warned us to vaccinate...

[@ZeroGForce]

"This is a collaboration with other Chinese consumers." "Thor winks and opens the locusts _(murder hornets)."_ "Duchess, now! Well, dance! Play well and vaccinate!" "When you encounter an obstacle, you go to Heaven." "Dog, dog, dog, dog, dog, dog, dog, dog, dog, dog, dog." ...accurate.

[@spaghetti_2448]

C O R O N A

[@johnmachut6938]

“He put his head in the oven”. No nO SaNtA

[@callmeanon307]

*NO SANTA NO*

[@darshraatparsadhraj5583]

“He got up out of bed to get used to the situation” Me, every morning when I wake up, I guess

[@RC-iw7um]

"the child is a child" _hmm, yes, the floor here is made out of floor_

[@davincent98]

"And when I wake up, I'm getting a CT scan!"

[@littlelovegoodanimations9043]

the snow is snow

[@narey8229]

*sniff* yes and the smell in the air has a smell

[@iquitthischannel.youmustfi4527]

_BREATH_ Ah Yes, The *AIR* Here Is Made Out Of *AIR*

[@leah4122]

69 likes I can't ruin that

[@k.c.maiale7504]

"The snow is like....snow." Me trying to explain anything.

[@angiebeaudoin9926]

ThE ChiLd Is A cHiLd

[@shadowisinsane845]

S a m e

[@shadowisinsane845]

@@angiebeaudoin9926 dog, dog, dog, dog, dog, dog, dog

[@neonthefox3550]

"Thor winks and unlocks the locusts" Thor was doing a good thing and freeing them... Like a hero.

[@Ellenchattergirl]

I am inevitable

[@gachalegends9421]

I like how Rudolph is never mentioned in any Christmas story that has Santa calling his reindeer XD

[@pageturner2958]

He only goes when it is important to the plot

[@xeveemon]

@@pageturner2958 Okay, but what is Olive’s excuse?

[@774martinn]

"I smiled when I saw her," * but she didn't recognise me....*

[@sanatizerrr]

Relating to us

[@jessabelvin1697]

Welcome to my life

[@Ellenchattergirl]

This quote reminds me of that one time I fell for a straight girl

[@hex28]

It's ok she didn't recognize me either...

[@natethegreat7881]

Story of my life

[@SmoshyGoodness87]

"When you encounter an obstacle, you go to heaven" Well, yeah, if you encounter it hard enough 🤷🏻‍♀️🤷🏻‍♀️

[@StarDripluvsSunDrop]

Lawl XD

[@Monster_Lock]

"a child is a… child" *Slow claps*

[@elechronic]

The snow is like snow

[@flowerpot1300]

Ah yes, the floor is made of floor.

[@smam375]

Dog

[@christinauwu436]

@flowerpot I was going to say that toooo lol

[@williamperry414]

*"As a result, you may not realize that anxiety is coming from China."* Definition of 2020.

[@penguin22penguin22]

yeah ikr but it's called "covid-19" which means 2019 , but yeah

[@michi-tankenka8116]

@@penguin22penguin22 covid-19 is from 2019 because it’s from late 2019 or a day before 2020.

[@penguin22penguin22]

@@michi-tankenka8116 ik , co=corona vi=virus d=December and 19=2019 I think.

[@michi-tankenka8116]

@@penguin22penguin22 You’re all right

[@penguin22penguin22]

@@michi-tankenka8116 ok

[@jamesfrost126]

This one contained all of the recurring themes: Satanism, alcohol, random geography and food!

[@petergray2712]

I wish I could be that intensely bipolar😜

[@TheChaotic-fi2fu]

Sex and murder along with having anxiety

[@TheChaotic-fi2fu]

And cursing and death

[@TheChaotic-fi2fu]

Sadness too

[@TheChaotic-fi2fu]

And bleeding

[@zelda8203]

Phoebe trying to teach Joey french: *black and white clips* Joey: “coloured clips*

[@NicoNico-tx1fb]

Yessss

[@joerawlins100]

"He got up out of bed to get used to the situation." Mood.

[@jessmires5504]

5:13 *google translate loves dogs.*

[@jennlackey8519]

“The baby can fly faster than the storm.” Google translate 2019 -

[@Willow_Wisp279]

They chucked a baby and it then hit an obstacle and died

[@cedartheyeah.justyeah.3967]

Why does this remind me of The Incredibles?

[@mareenaur]

"This is a collaboration with other Chinese consumers" "Anxiety is coming from China" China: ...

[@fartherlights9594]

China = Anxiety... So anxiety is contagious? :O

[@khloenuguid6065]

It's because of Corona Virus 😷😣

[@НедаСтојановиќ]

Anxiety: made in China

[@57thorns]

That alone should warrant an angry letter from the Chinese Embassy. If it weren't for the fact they deal those out like flyers for a Christmas Concert those letters would be a valuable collectible item.

[@MattPerk7]

Coronavirus

[@zoeyc3855]

Regular: "He looked like a peddler opening his sack" Google translate: "Throw it back"

[@i.m1ss.y0u.s0.f4r]

Tik tok boys: ok Google translate: I wasn’t talking to you I was talking to SANTA

[@gracedyer-baker3902]

I really connect on a personal level to the line, "Dog, dog, dog, dog, dog, dog, dog, dog, dog, dog, dog, dog, dog, dog, dog, dog, dog" It just gets me, ya know?

[@TSterTheGreat01]

"As a result you may not realize that anxiety is coming from China" I feel like a terrible person for finding this incredibly ironic

[@imjango1052]

"His face was full of explosions" Ah. I see we are reading the Michael Bay version.

[@kunimip8925]

“The child is a child” “The snow is like snow” R/technically correct-?

[@un-human418]

R/technicallythetruth fits this a bit better

[@NekoMimiOfficial]

Hmmmm yes ! The floor here is made out of floor (Can someone use Google translate and see what it will turn this to XD)

[@mollyroughan1154]

@@NekoMimiOfficial I just did! I went through about 10 languages: “Yes, yes, yes, yes, I know how it was meant at first.”

[@iwasDJYukey]

@@NekoMimiOfficial ok i know someone else did but here it is and uh.... Hmmm yes! The soil is clay wtf google translate-

[@NekoMimiOfficial]

@@iwasDJYukey nice the drunk Translator is drunk